The Most Misunderstood MBTI Type No One Cares About
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- Опубліковано 27 лип 2024
- INTJs are routinely misunderstood and no one seems to care in comparison to our sister types. This video is me telling all my fellow INTJs that I personally care and that you're not alone in that feeling.
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I turned 81 yesterday, and am an INTJ. This is the first time anyone ever stated the basic difficulty people like myself live with, and live with, and live with……..
Happy belated birthday Judith! 81 is the new 30 😀
I hope so. The first time I turned 30 I was perishing of old age! Now, not so much.
I was lucky to have an INTJ father and brother; we had little difficulty understanding an appreciating each other. Then my dad’s INTP brother (our favorite uncle) got involved as a board member for the Association for Psychological Type circa 1970? We mostly saw it as a way to understand everyone else, however. 😉
@@judithgockel1001 Ha Judith me too...tomorrow I will be turning 76...life got easier for me too...I have lived alot learned alot enjoyed alot and hope to continue. As long as l7fe is postitive..happy belated birthday.
@@latinaalma1947 - and a joyous birthday to you as well! My brother was born in ‘47, too . He, however, is getting old!😁
As an INTJ woman I always felt so misunderstood. "you are so cold" "smile more" "why are you so mean" but this video made me feel better. Thank you!!!
✊
INTJ woman is a tough spawn... I feel you
I empathize. I heard all of that - repeatedly. My all-time unfavorite: "You're not normal!" That came from a hedonistic and irresponsible general manager at a busy workplace wherein I was literally doing the work of two or even three people (coworkers who were calling off entirely or coming to work intoxicated).
Me too. I learned to ignore those people and as the years passed each year I felt better about who I was inside....I have had at soon 76, a gloriously happy and productive life. I wish I could have run the movie reel of my life in front of my 10, 13, 16, 22, 25, 30 yr old eyes for me to see what beautiful things, experiences and people who loved me full tilt, lay in my future..I would have been amazed.
"smile more" hits me in the bottom of my heart
I gave up on being understood a long time ago 😪 now I don't care anymore and I just live my life.
Live your best life brotha ✊
I am on my way your destination bro, good girl friends good family still lonely, black sheep, you should smile more
well... i understand... 🥲
How do you do that?
I'm trying to figure out how to do the same.
I’m an INFJ, and my daughter is an INTJ. I love her so much- she is absolutely priceless and is my best friend. She is the kindest and most helpful person. She is grounded and true. I chose early on not to push her into social situations or to change her- I wanted to see who she was. INTJ’s are the coolest people. They are knowledgeable and resourceful. They are understanding and good listeners. If you don’t take too much from them, they can be there for you like no one else can. Love my INTJ!!!!!!
Thank you for raising your INTJ the way you do! It's easy for us to feel suffocated and we grow up already aware that we're different so it's nice to hear that you've allowed your daugther to grow at her own pace. ❤
Awesome. I'm happy for y'all both. It's really hard for INTJs to socialize and least interested in having a relationship or even kids but seeing your a INTJ and you happened to have a INTJ kid is straight out a miracle. 😎
I think INTJs can significantly benefit from principles of the Stoic philosophy, notably that we cannot control what other people say or do, rather we can recognize the judgements we make and acknowledge them as just our judgements. Other people projecting their insecurities and immaturity on us is a reflection of their character and not our own. I think many INTJs can benefit from leaning into their stubborn confidence and become even more polarizing, so it easily filters out those incompatible and strongly attracts those who are compatible.
Agreed 100% to focus on your strengths and those that are willing to follow will follow ✊
INTJs ARE the stoic principle. We wouldn't want to control others even if we could. That'd be work.
My mother introduced me to the concept of being a Stoic like her. My father also had Stoic traits, that he bestowed upon his sons.
Daily Stoic be like "say the absolute bare minimum to not be a burden on anyone"
Well, my "relief" was pretty much Sunzi's Art of war, the 36 strategies, and history books.. I became dwelled in critically analyzing whatsoever events in history and few moments later, I became a "seer" in terms of making accurate predictions..
But on the downside, I started feeling that I'm becoming manipulative.. But then I am okay with it...
This is so true, as in INFP who can easily understand people, I always find INTJ the most complex personalities, they are like a riddle, you really have to be honest and straightforward to get to know them while also keeping a safe distance to not make them run away. it is truly an honor when an INTJ actually open to me. They are really like cats 🐈
Being honest and straight forward should ne easy for an INFP 🙂
i think an infp is one of the easiest types for an intj to open up to. we know, you all like cats. 🤭
INFPs like cats and INTJs act like cats, so I guess it's a good synergy here :D
@@Braenn666 Yep. Cats = good, INTJ = cat, therefore INTJ = good. (INFP here.)
101% agree, INTJ are as cute and complex like cats
Good that as INTJ we couldn’t care less if we are understood or not. Results speak for themselves, and we are internally confident with or without external input.
I agree completely. There just shouldn't be a dichotomy. INTJs should be able to produce results while still being understood but this is the reality that we live in. Keep kicking ass INTJ ✊
I opened up to a friend about being worried, anxious and depressed in hs because of my family members getting sick and dying. She told me that other people had rough times and it could be worse. It took over 10 yrs before I opened up like that to another friend
It sucks to hear that your pain wasn't being acknowledged. It's also nice to hear that you finally opened up to someone deserving of your trust and time ✊
I think some people feel righteous or something when they put others down. There are a lot of amazing people out there. Keep hope alive, I guess...? :D
Let me give you an INFP commentary about that "friend": What a shitheel!!! And more seriously, maybe it's an Fi-dom thing but to my mind it's incredibly wrong to devalue someone else's pain. To that person it IS the worst thing in their world and should be treated with according to that level of seriousness.
That is just... poison to an INTJ. One of the few, rare times that we open up, and we just get shot down.
Me too. So I never open up! I use small talk in order to keep my mouth closed about the really important things. People say I am superficial...😢😢😢😢
It's such a relief to see other people having the same experience about the fact we look like bragging when we try to express ourselves. I could never understand why I cannot share my joy with others without being misundestood. I could'nt say it helped me understand why it happened but at least I know im not alone. Thank you.
You're never alone brotha ✊
Omg I legit teared up when you were talking about how INTJ’s get overshadowed by our fellow IN brothers. Especially the part about expressing emotions, cause it’s already hard enough to express emotions in the first place, and then to have someone tell you you’re being fake or disingenuous…that hurts
I understand ❤
For it's my own parents, note both are xsxjs
I've never been told such, but I get a vibe from some that they think I'm fake. And it's due to my inability to express myself, which is due to my tendency to be "antisocial" 🤕
Yes! Us IN types are the loneliest types.
I felt like this was a love letter to INTJs! ❤ Thank you for being that voice. As a female INTJ, I’ve always felt different from my peers growing up (and sometimes still do as an adult). Looking forward to more of your videos!
Thank you, I really appreciate the kind words and support 🙏
Love letter pretty accurate indeed!!
yes! 100%!
For all the INTJs out there that feel misunderstood, I highly recommend checking out Harry (INFJ) at Cognitive Personality Theory, he gets INTJs. As well, Nathan (INTP) over at Love Who understands as well.
Thank you for making this video. (And that RBF/Death Stare definitely doesn't help us.)
Great channels recommendation ! I learnt a lot too with Asura Psych and Lijo, and many others INTJ creators.
@@Elodie_N_INTJ_Analyzes Lijo is grifter and not an INTJ.
@@DesertILI Why so many people invalidate the type of other people ? And they can't even prove it.
_She is officially typed : FM-INTJ-Ni/Te BPSC (Objective personality)
FM meaning : Feminine Se, Masculine Te (and so Masculine Ni, Feminine Fi) and Visual/Tester as leaning style.
Ni-Te (Blast), Se-Te (Play), Ni-Fi (Sleep), Se-Fi (consume), that's why she look like extroverted, and her behavior is similar to ESFP.
_Whereas an MM-INTJ-Ni/Fi SCBP like me, who is one of the most introverted type, can appears like an ISFP or ISTJ in the behavior.
MM meaning : Masculine Se, Te, and Feminine Ni, Fi. And Learning style Kinesthetic/Audio.
Ni-Fi (Sleep), Se-Fi (Consume), Ni-Te (Blast), Te-Se (Play)
No one fit to the stereotype. If we add the enneagram and subtype from rational typology, you will see how 2 INTJ can be really different.
@@Elodie_N_INTJ_Analyzes Because she's been shown to be a grifter and has anything negative about her taken down across the internet. Try googling her. There was a huge reddit post that broke everything down. She was also tested in OP which is their own verkakte system. It's not MBTI or That doesn't make her one.
Hell, just check our her being type policed. She was so out in left field in the video used. She's removed the source video and most of her early videos that showed her true personality before she started the grift.
That's the problem with internet (full of people opinions and wrong informations), it's better to think by ourselves. The better is to talk/write to the person directly, and you would be surprise she have the same way of thinking than you. I think she know herself and her type better than anyone else.
In the comments of the video you mention, she wrote : "Again, study my channel, I’m an INTJ that plays the SF game."
In camera, we all more or less acting (we have no choice), we all show the SF side of our personality or super ego (that's why most of people see INTJ as ISFP, ESFP, ISFJ in the behavior). INTJ is our ego side, ESFP subconscious side, ENTP unconscious side, ISFJ super ego side.
No video show our "true personality", it's difficult to show our entire personality, we show the parts of our personality we want to share. People only see/know what we show/tell to them.
In one of her last video she shared her psychological assessment (in part the WAIS IV test which evaluate mainly the pattern recognition, and problem solving : it's typically NT type) We even exchanged messages in live, and commented about it.
Multi potential (gifted) and Asperger we have good capacity of adaptation to every situation. We can pass for a typical person.
She surely have a talent for acting, du to her multi potential and Play (Se Te)
When I’m alone I’m not lonely. I’m only lonely with other people. Being with those who don’t understand you makes you long for someone who does when you need an ally.
I feel lonely sometimes when I'm alone. It doesn't happen often but just Ariel from The Little Mermaid, sometimes I just want to be part of that world 😅
@@justcallmejon22 I can't help feeling that they look like they're having fun doing things that aren't fun, so I rarely envy them. Also, my parents were INTJ and ISTJ, and I have concluded that the N/S difference is structural in the way information is processed--parallel universes between S/N. I think the wiring is different, whereas the other pairs are more fluid and change with various hormones or other influences--easier to compromise and understand. I did feel like something was missing after being on a new job for a couple of years where, for the first time since age 2.5 until age 35, no one was following my lead. I had gone from eldest child to retail manager before that, and missed the team.
It's very frustrating being misunderstood all the time. I'll make a comment, thinking out loud and the other person will think I am being defensive or need validation, when that is furthest from the truth. Or I'll suggest an idea at work, leadership doesnt understand it, someone above them says the same thing 3 months later and suddenly its the best idea ever.
It's definitely frustrating. One of my favorites is being called rude for stating facts.
It's worst when it happens at work because that's your livelihood being affected 😤
This is the most frustrating! An old boss of mine made a suggestion that would not work for many reasons. So I tried to tell her that the way we were doing it was already working better and was, essentially, the same thing but more efficient.
After a few rounds of circular arguing, a coworker gave me a sign to drop it because it wasn't getting through to her, so I agreed to her suggestion.
Naturally, within a few weeks, her idea was proven to not work and we were back to doing it the original way.
Omg! Yes! I tell my "superiors", what will happen if they hire that person. Months later; after they sack that piece of shit, they ignore me again.
The last one is so damn frustrating, story of my life.
Thanks Jonathan for this video. I am a 57 year old classic INTJ-A and could definitely relate to nearly everything you stated. I often tell people that I'm almost always alone, but I very rarely actually feel lonely. Having a rich internalized and active fantasy life seems to help me. Often times those fantasies involve simply meeting people that I consider interesting and playing out long conversations between us in my mind. Spending time out in nature also helps a lot. I find that for me, people often find me intriguing and interesting in the beginning but eventually find it more difficult to relate to my ideologies and often end up feeling intimidated by my strong moral and ethical dispositions. I can of course only take so much engagement in 'small talk' or trivial concerns and most people don't really seem to care to dive as deeply into topics of science, spirituality etc as I do. They recognize my intellectual level and often ask me to "dumb things down". I have just subscribed and will be checking out more of your videos in the future as time allows. Thanks again. 🙂
Thank you for the kind words and for the support! We INTJs are really just built different, not in a negative way but just different. It sounds like you've learned how to engage Se, so I hope you enjoy life the way you want to ✊
Thank you for this! I am not nuts, then.😂
I'm 61 yo. I had to figure this out by myself. Misunderstood my whole life. Then I found out about the INTJ. Finally put everything into perspective. This is the most powerful personality trait. You young folks are lucky for UA-cam. All INTJS out there learn to harness this gift. And life is a breeze.
💯
My closest friend I believe is an INTJ. Love her to death! Definitely an underappreciated type. She's so much more put together and capable than I am in life. I find myself wishing I could be more like her. The INTJ function stack is no joke, you guys are pretty amazing!
I'm sure she'll appreciate it if you told her that even if she's going to act weird about it 😅
What's your type?enfp? Or esfp?
Hearing your stories was like walking through my own memories. It's crazy how mbti is considered pseudoscience but intjs always have such similar experiences. I got accused of every single thing on that list too. Especially bragging when not. You include your score with everyone else, you're bragging. You hide it to not discourage anyone, you're arrogant and belittling. Dead if you do, dead if you don't.
Looks like the ai overlord deleted one of my comments. I'll just leave the quote since you were talking about jokes.
"Without laughter and joy to balance out the sorrow, there is no hope of a brighter future"
Damn if you do, damned if you don't 🙃
I think maybe MBTI is best described as a pragmatic tool rather than as a science. Its limitations need to be recognized in that it isn't backed with the kind of studies that the Big Five has (which I do think is rather funny considering the extremely semantically-charged terminology the Big Five uses that to me does *not* seem scientifically sound), but if you are willing to take it within those limitations and not try to overextend it to things like hiring processes and other things where you need scientific rigor, then it can be used. ''
Think, for example, of how you can use Newtonian physics for most cases within the solar system but you have to recognize that's just giving you an estimate that is good enough at such a small scale and if you want to deal with edge cases in our solar system like Mercury's orbit, or with things on a larger scale than what we deal with when sending interplanetary probes, you're going to need a more rigorous tool, that is, Einsteinian physics. (And of course that doesn't cut it when you start trying to merge it with quantum physics so when we get around to finally explaining gravity, Einsteinian physics will have to give way in those applications even though still perfectly good for other use cases outside of black holes and the like.)
As an INFP I am strangely attracted to INTJs
Trust me when I say the feeling is mutual about how the INTJ feels about INFPs 🙂
@@justcallmejon22 yeah! when an intj-robot sees an infp, the robot suddenly turns into a teddybear. 🤤
Agreed! I’m an intj and my boyfriend is infp, and it’s the healthiest relationship I’ve ever been in. Intj and infp balance each other well.
Jon, being misunderstood= loneliness. No one understands how you process data, so you are left stranded so often. You need to to think about it too deeply. One thing just leads to another. It's like being a foreigner in a strange land where literally no one speaks your language. Great video! I enjoyed it.
At least we INTJs got each other 💪
You accurately pointed out all the kindly vs critical evaluations of other types vs. INTJ!! Thank you!
As a child, I remember going to my grandmother in tears over my mother, who thought everyone was supposed to think and act like she did.. and my grandmother telling her, "You'll never understand this child".. as evidenced by my reaction to when my mother ordered me to be a rebel.... and as a child, I sat there thinking, how do you rebel against an order to rebel?... ! By complying ! Nope. That was not the answer she wanted.
Then as an adult, people would say "You should share more of yourself".. and then tell me "don't be so negative"... well, at the time I was surrounded in a place best described as "not nice. not pleasant. not encouraging." So yes, it takes me a while to decide whether it's safe to share things with other people. "We want someone who.... - but not you."
Luckily, I like myself, and can be good company on my own. So there's that. Great fun, and keep making content!
Thank you for sharing your experience and I can relate because that's how I was with my father. It really is an interesting thing that most people don't realize about an INTJ. That we've felt alone for so long that we learned to enjoy our own company.
@@justcallmejon22 so even you it's the dad huh
If I had to point out the one comment that messed me up the most as a young INTJ (though I had no clue about this way back then, way before the internet even) is that one about having something "wrong" with me, and all the subsequent pressure to "change", like that was a even a possibility. That created traumas and unresolved identify issues that took me literally years to solve... Yeah, talk about being misunderstood. I really can understand your mood
So true. Made to feel there was something wrong with me as I never wanted to belong to or think like the group.
I understand brotha and I'm happy to hear that you resolved it ✊
Absolutely agree that I'm not judging the person, I'm actively listening. What's going on in my head is using each piece of info I'm receiving from that person to go down decision/data flow paths in templates I've already developed from experience, research, and/or intuition. Based on where that interaction ends on the respective template will guide whether I want to continue to interact with them or not. But that's not a judgment of that person's value as good/bad, right/wrong, mature/immature, etc. It's more of a decision whether there's enough value to me to continue to spend my limited time and energy. Even if I don't 'like' the content of what is being expressed, I love when I hear something new that forces a new branch on the decision tree; i.e., I learned something new for now and to, potentially, better identify patterns in the future.
INTJs and our desire to learn can find the best quality in anyone ✊
One thing I hate is when someone tells me something, and I mention a similar circumstance that I have faced "You stole the spotlight and are trying to make it about you"
No? I'm trying to relate to you and show you empathy.
As an ENFP, I am watching this video (and many related videos and reads forums) because I want to understand my INTJ friend. This is my first time meeting one and I am extremely fascinated by his personality and the way he think. I want to keep our friendship so I'm trying my best to be a better friend for him. 😊
Ask all the questions you'd like and I'm sure someone from the community will be happy to answer. Take care of my fellow INTJ please 🙏
i think communication with enfps and intjs isnt so hard, because both have te and fi...
well... the most difficult thing for me as an intj about an enfp is that they are sometimes so chaotic and spontaneous... but on the other hand i like how enfps can help me, to come out of my shell... and they are full of cazy ideas, like we secretly are...☺
ENFPs are the best, especially women. Don't try to be something for him, just be you. That's the best thing an ENFP can do for their INTJ. We like the quirky and odd side of you. It seems like when an ENFP try to hard that that's the side that they suppress since it's what works with normal people. Neither of us is normal so let your freak flag fly. :)
The other best thing that you could do is just try to follow through with anything that you tell him that you're going to to, especially if it's for him. It'll be a pleasant surprise for him since we've learned to work around when our ENFPs get flaky.
I know right? I'm INTJ and all the ENFPs I've met both in real life and the ones in the media are so adorable 😭
A fellow INTJ here 🙂. Great video! I'm a bit older (in my mid 40s) so I've already crossed that bridge. Yes, you'll be always be misunderstood (and even sometimes taken for an idiot, and even by idiots... 🤦♂️)... Anyway, you'll figure out how to communicate better and disregard other's opinions more, so no biggy. Also, you'll improve at identiying who you can share things with. Anyway, what I wanted to share is how important I think it is for younger INTJs to see/listen to older INTJs, to see/hear how they overcame their struggles, to feel the solace from seeing an older INTJ going about their life and how things have worked out for him/her (because we always figure it out / we always win in the end 😉, and if we haven't won, it's not the end yet)...
Love that line "If we haven't won yet, it's not the end." I'm taking it as my own 🤣
@@justcallmejon22 Sure, no problem, I took John Lennon's "Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end" and made it more INTJish.
I came across your channel thanks to UA-cam suggestions. I love your videos bc they really help me understand who i am. As a female INTJ, I’ve experienced every misunderstandings that you’ve listed in your videos. It is such a struggle to find someone to see us as a normal person. Thank you for creating these videos and putting them out there for people like me who’s on the self understanding journey and for non-INTJs to better understand us. ❤
Welcome to the community! I would offer cookies if it were an actual physical place. Being an INTJ is synonomous with being a person that's misunderstood but the beauty in the time of technology so you're only a website away from finding likeminded people. Stay as long as you need fellow INTJ, you're always welcomed here ❤
This was such a well put together and articulate video on the struggle with being an INTJ and interacting with others. There are so MANY times I can recall where I'd set clear guidelines, expectations, and taken even subtle measures based on knowing how people would react to something I was about to do or say, and even with all of that, my intent would be misconstrued usually to the negative. It's honestly exhausting and big reason why it seems like INTJs resolve to withdraw socially when the obvious red flags start popping up.
But I've also ran into people who do understand and do get that, unless I specifically state otherwise, I'm operating with the best intent to what I believe the desired outcome is based on the information I was provided. And when people understand that, you can see some magical moments and truly awesome growth conversations happen. Do I wish there was an easier way? Absolutely! But the struggle does make me cherish those allies I have gained along the way so much more.
I'm always happy to hear when an INTJ find their tribe ✊
One less miserable intj but remember they could easy be pretending humans are good at that
As a side note: even INFJs can misunderstand us. I'm waiting for the day I can plot out an INTP's cognitive algorithm and build a partner who I can have real conversations with and whom I can learn with and from.
I've met both healthy and unhealthy INFJs so I agree that they can still misunderstand us. You shouldn't let that experience deter you from meeting others (if that's your reaction, if not then my bad 😅)
@@justcallmejon22 No worries, it doesn't. I've come across other INFJs that are still able to understand and accept INTJs. The latter portion is because I'm an altero-ace, so I don't have much faith in finding a match. That's all. :)
Same though there intps that simply don't like intjs keep a look out for Fe nasty stuff
I had an infj friend who we really got along then he just quit on me cause I didn't go to church with him 😂😭🤣
@@beautifullittleoni1216 what's that alter.... something
You get it Jon. All my life one of my biggest frustrations has been being misunderstood.
I definately understand your frustration ✊
same
It's been my observation/experience that you have to earn your place in the INTJ's Circle of Trust before we'll show you our true selves, so we're going to be a mystery for those folks not in that group. That being said, it does seem as if folks give up trying to understand INTJs, even on a superficial level, fairly easily. Certainly, we are hard to read (even for ENFJs and INFJs) but not impossible if one makes any effort. It often seems like some folks misunderstand us deliberately, just to see if they can get under our skin or due to some underlying emotional issues.
Being misunderstood deliberately is something that I can relate all too well. I usually just let those people live in their bubble if it doesn't affect me ✊
@@justcallmejon22 same i just want to know how do you ignore them when they are your own parents should I move out and leave the family company which I am stakeholding at a young age
I have resulted as both ISTJ and INTJ but this video speaks 200 % to my lifelong, every day struggles at communicating with others. I have excellent abilities at writing and deciphering between-the-lines; but still, somehow, when I speak, no one understands me, while what I write is perfectly expressed. Many times I go undermined or undervalued because what I say doesn't have the impact it should have if someone had read it first, and there is no time to read everything I want or should express at work, home, friends' gatherings, etc. They often think I'm bragging, showing off, criticizing, ignoring, misinterpreting and ridiculizing others' possessions and ideas just to make me look and appear better than everyone else is at whatever the topic is. But if I'm alone in the back of the room, quiet, bored, and disinterested, it's because "I am too good to waste my time with them", when in reality, I have just given up on trying to socialize.
I've met a few ISTJs that felt similar so regardless of what type you are, you're not alone. It sucks brotha but you get used to it if you haven't already ✊🏼
Just be yourself anyway. It will scare off the wrong people and attract the right people. into your life. You're gonna be lonley and misunderstood by the wrong people either way - just let it happen and just go do you how you want to. :)
I think most people who look up these videos tried being ourselves and it didn't help as much as we want it to, me being one of them 🤣
As an INTJ, this is utterly relatable. I needed to see this video, indeed. Thank you.
I'm going to quote your username, It's OK. You're not alone ✊
Your the only content creator that earned my respect.
I'm happy to hear that, thank you 🙏
This video is amazing, at first I didn't like this MBTI stuff because most content creators don't go as deep into it - but this video changed my mind, it's like for the first time in the world someone explained exactly what has been happening from childhood to today, this is so helpful, thanks a ton man
You're not alone brotha and I appreciate the comment as well ✊
Thank you for creating your channel! I admire your gumption in this YT endeavor. There are times when I really seek out INTJ videos online to make myself feel 'normal' - that I am not the only one. It's therapeutic. Your channel is a gold mine. Just, thank you so much. :)
I appreciate the support and glad that you're enjoying my content 🙏
INTJ here👋 Thank you for your videos❤️
✊
INTJs are great. They may not be the fuzziest creatures out there, but you guys show love/care/support through actions. So many people say nice things but don't back it up - if an INTJ does, they really mean it.
Happy to hear that someone understands us ❤
"The wolf doesn't concern itself with the opinions of the sheep." ...is a thing I learned not to say out loud.
How do you know that you're a wolf instead of just another black sheep?! 🙃
I appreciate your videos and look forward to them as an INTJ. Keep up the great work.
I appreciate the support, thank you 🙏
Very accurate video. I have set up personal barriers to protect myself from all the things you talked about your video. I have decided that I'm always going to be misunderstood, so I observe people a lot before I engage in true conversation. Meaning I'm not opening up on a personal level until I have decided it's safe for me to do so. Tons of acquaintances, hardly any friends, yep that's me.
That's the best approach 💯
Great video as per usual 🥰 it is unfortunate that most people don't understand us, but having the internet is a major life upgrade. Can't wait for the next video.
Thank you 🙏
Your videos are great!! Thank you for representing us so well.
Ughh...it's gross to hear this out-loud and not not in my voice...
...though it's even worse hearing it in my own voice while also believing that no one that I know will ever be willing to understand me 🙃
As usual, you speak my souls words.
Great work, Uncle Jon
You might feel lonely but you're never alone ✊
Thank you Jon. I really needed to hear this
Anytime brotha ✊
Thank you, you are sweet. It’s rare that I ever tell any one this especially a stranger. It makes me feel happy that I can relate to you since we are both INTJ’s! Cheers 🎉
I appreciate the kind words, I truly do. Lets continue pushing positivity in this community ✊🏼
Great video. You earned a sub with it. It's so nice and refreshing to see a good INTJ video that's not just playing off of the stereo types. Although we might need to do some of these as secret videos. We can't have you telling everyone else our secrets. 😉
I assure you that INTJs will always be a secret to people no matter how much they learn about us 😅
Bro this so true, one of my most proudest traits is that I always see what others cannot, but then it is also one of the most annoying traits because I have not one who really understands what I can understand, and so what I see is so often ignored or I don't even put it out there in the first place
Also nice Saitama T shirt
It really is a super power so I'm glad that you've embraced it ✊
@@justcallmejon22thanks for replying to a 1 year old video
The ending gave me Shivers.... Thank youuuu!!! I appreciate your perspective of our Truth!!!
❤😂❤
Thank you! I hope you have a great day, my INTJ sister 😀
Thank you for the video! When I was a child I constantly heard that I should smile more, be more friendly, play with other kids not asking questions about choices, life paths, multiuniverses and so on. It made me angry and anxious at the same time. Fortunately, I had my mom. Today I still have this problem with people except my best friends. Yes, I agree with your point about relatives. We love them deeply but most of them, even them, see us as aliens. Being misunderstood becomes natural for us, I suppose. We have to explain more and more thorough. Sometimes it seems overwhelming and exhausting. When I met my best friend intp, she asked why I try to explain obvious things. And it was so refreshing, I finally could talk without filters. I know it's hard and challenging for us to meet someone who understands but I am sure we are not alone in this. Thank you again!
One of my closest friend since childhood is an INTP so I always felt lucky having him around not making me feel too much like an alien. I'm glad you found someone that understands you and yeah..alien in our own tribe 😆
Thank you very much, Jon. You speak for me.
I got you ✊
Watching your videos makes me really emotional. Thanks you, so much - feeling blessed thay even for a few minutes watching your videos made me feel sane. 🙏
You're not alone my INTJ sibling ❤
Infjs, feel u all Intjs, don't ever give up guys, just help us to connect with u 🥺
Love u guys ❤💛💜
❤
As an INTJ who was born in Nigeria and have been living in Nigeria, it's really tough because people do not really know about and understand the whole personality type thing and it can be really frustrating for me because I get misunderstood a whole lot and I get very lonely too, and me being by myself is even misunderstood as me being proud and that I don't need anybody, whereas I freaking get lonely. It is just a long list of misunderstandings.
I feel your pain because even though I live in the US, my friends and family think cognitive functions are fake. It makes me feel a little better knowing that I'm not the only person who feels this way and with this specific experience. You're not alone brother, there are people out there who can relate to you ✊
I’m really hoping to find more people around me and most importantly, be a part of a community where I can interact with people that understands these things. I think you might want to consider doing that, with the kind of audience you have consisting of people who need that, not only to learn from your videos, also to do life with.
I’m looking forward to that man
This video is incredible. Thank you.
Glad you enjoyed it ✊
infjs are just as misunderstood with their good intentions and honesty
This is textbook for the life of an INTJ. Perfect.
😂
Absolutely! INFJs are great people! I'm one 🙂 it's great
Definately one of the easiest type to bond with ✊
This video describes it perfectly, especially the part where when the INTJ shows emotion everyone says their "fake", that was exactly what others said about me last year when I tried to show feelings.
I feel your pain ✊
This video really hits close to home.
I got you ✊
loved this video! not only was it completely accurate but it also encompassed why i love your channel. once i got into mbti i found plenty of good channels but none that were INTJ centric. once i found you it was like a breath of fresh air. it's refreshing to be around like minded people in our little INTJ corner of youtube 😉
Thank you, I appreciate the support! You're not alone INTJ, we're just a website away. Please keep commenting because this channel is building a positive support system for all INTJs ✊
Im not even going to over explain myself here bro but just know this is mad accurate
✊
Your sayings are realistic and practical on INTJ I accept the points you explain 👍🏻Keep going
Thank you 🙏
Thank you for understanding
❤
Thank you so much! I am also an INTJ and I randomly came across your channel clicked on it and I am soooo glad! I actually feel relief that I connected. Appreciate what you are doing.
Welcome to the community! You're safe and always welcomed here my INTJ sister ✊
@@justcallmejon22 Thank you
@@justcallmejon22 Thank you!
I grew up feeling alone but with the goal of being a filmmaker. I made myself heard through story telling and movies were like friends.
This INTJ thanks you to making this video.
You have any work that you're willing to share with the community? I'm sure people would enjoy seeing projects that you're proud of 🙂
Thanks a lot for this message. Coming from childhood, adolescence, and young adult years I’ve come to the conclusion that I am misunderstood and a big part of me likes it that way. I realized that it’s best to say and do as I please (in a positive way of course), and those who have a hard time grasping it are just going to have deal with it. Those who get it will be blessed, lol. Also someone described my RBF as RGF (Resting Gansta Face), I like that better.
RGF reminds me of something that happened a long ago. Someone thought I was mean-mugging them because of how I looked but it was just the sun was too bright shinging in my eyes. Almost got into a fight because of that 😂
I'm only half way through this video and I'm bawling my eyes out and want to hug you.
No hug necessary, a comment is more than enough 🙂
This deserves applause in Ted Talk. Good speech Jon. I've been binging your videos. Infj here.
Thank you for the kind words 🙏
and if you'll be really lucky, you' ll meet that one ENFP, who'll make your life more bright and magical. they thank you, when you give them harsh and honest advice, because they think, it's practical and real, and it show them, that you care. at least, I met such unicorn. and she is my best friend for almost 20 years ))))
and my sister is INFJ, so I was born very lucky 😁
Always happy to hear positive stories about the golden pair 😄
@@justcallmejon22 it's not pair, just a beautiful friendship. I'm still INTJ 😆 romantic relationships (after few failed attempts) are still something alien to me. I understand the process, I just can't catch a right moment. Ever)))
thank you, finnaly i find my tribe on the internet, first time i got test result, it was aha moment for me. before i always know i am different but i cannot call what am i. keep going my fellows intj
Welcome to the community! Stay as long as you need and most importantly, have fun! 😁
Myers Briggs saved me. Took the rest with the lowest possible expectations because personality tests had never even come close to working for me. Found my type and read the description and holy 💩, it knew things about me that I had never told anyone. Suddenly I knew that I was not broken and there were other people like me in the world. In a blinding flash I was so much less alone in the world. And that did wonderful things for my mental health, which needed it badly at the time.
Trust me when I say that I understand that feeling 💯
I care about people of your type. Everyone is misunderstood, but your type is making more leaps than most people can follow. I might not be able to understand all, but I will not want to stop from trying to learn.
I may look like I am being understood by others, but I rarely ever share as much as I wish I could because it's difficult to be truly understood. I feel you have the ability to understand me better than most. Your friendly ENFP.
I usually enjoy my conversations with ENFPs and I agree that there's mutual understanding of being non judgemental and matching the same energy. Keep being you and take care of my fellow INTJs 🙏
Sometimes I feel like a sheep in wolf's clothing. Thank you for explaining why
Thank you for this. I’ve been feeling especially misunderstood today and this helps to remind me that it’s not me, it’s them.😅
I’ve watched a lot of INTJ content and yours is top-notch. 🙏
Thank you for the support! You're not alone fellow INTJ, the people that understand you are just a website away ✊
10:22 onwards
I needed to hear that for soo loong!
Almost got me into tears!
You'll find your tribe, my friend ✊
@JustCallMeJon. Dear one, I am so appreciative of you and your content. Thank You ❤️. My sweetheart is an INTJ and I really enjoy your channel. Best regards, sincerely, an INFP-T
Thank you for the kind words 🙏
If I could like this video 1000 times, I would. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 🙏
I got you ✊
I'm in this video and I don't like it... 😀
Yeah I realized these things just in the recent years, before that I also thought that I'm 'broken' or something. So good video again.
So far I didn't found my tribe and place in the world. A major problem are self-doubt, depression and anxiety. And throu this it's hard to show myself and my abilities.😒
You'll find your tribe but it will take effort. Keep trying but only when you're ready. I believe in you ✊
This is my life. Thanks Jon!
❤
I am enjoying your videos. I first tested as INFP, ENFP and INFJ. Then an offical test and consultancy gave me INTJ. I don’t relate to most of the stereotypes on the internet although the cognitive functions make sense as does my MBTI report. Still there was always some doubt. Hearing you put words to how my mind operates on a daily basis has almost completely erased that doubt. I don’t know why knowing for sure is so important to me but it is. You are the first content creator that has helped me affirm I am an INTJ rather than cause me to question it. Thank you
I questioned whether I was INTJ or not as well when I started getting into MBTI because I couldn't relate to the stereotype or a lot of the content. I'm happy to hear that my videos helped you arrive at your realization. Welcome to the family fellow INTJ ✊
Once again you’re right on point! I’ve been told the exact same things - you’re judging me, you’re being too hard on me, you’re being arrogant, and not being believed bc I came across the wrong way. Ugh So exhausting!
The only thing I keep hearing is, INTJ’s like to be alone. That’s so not true for me. I am fine alone for some time but definitely prefer a companion. As hard as it is to find someone who understands you, as a true INTJ I’m always evolving and learning, so I’ve become a better partner after each failed relationship and therefore just as confident as the previous (if not more).
Thanks for the great content! 🙏💪
One of my favorite quotes to rephrase what you expertly said in your comment, "Every day and in every way, I become better and better." ✊
Broooooooo!!! 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
Had to edit this!
Bro I have the EXACT SAME FAMILY LIFE AS YOU! this is why I feel I am an INTJ! Actually bro...Im 100% convinced now!
Well, im an INFJ...and I subscribed to you because I feel that based off of my personal experiences in life(probably about the last 18 months), my Fe and Ti are slowly transitioning into Te being my 2nd and Fi being my 3rd..because things that mattered to me before then(ir should matter to an INFJ) do not matter like they used to...So approaching my mid 40s, I can feel this shift.. EXCE LLENT WORK with the channel btw!
Whatever MBTI type you actually are, thank you for the kind words and we'll get through it together. We might be outcasts but that doesn't mean that we're not necessary ✊
So accurate. As an INTJ female, it's so tiring with my social life. Whatever i said, ended up ppls misunderstood me. So i learn it's easy to shut down the door to other even with my family, i just dont want to care too much anymore. My life feel much more easy this way.
It takes a while to find people that will allow and accept you for who you are. I hope that you're also working on developing yourself along the way because your future friends deserve the best version of yourself 🙂
Yes, I've learned just to not engage half the time if I have an opinion.
Me: "Well I think they should do x"
"Why should they do x? that makes no sense"
I usually drop it because I don't want to spend an hour laying out all the variables I've considered and the probabilities of different outcomes playing out. Plus I would usually need to give them a short primer on each of the different variables and fields that I'm drawing from so they could at least understand where I'm coming from. Not worth the time and effort. And they would usually just fight me on principle from them not wanting to admit that they were wrong, or that at least my opinion could have some merit (Not to say that INTJs are always right, but we do think through everything carefully)
Finally, Me:"You know what? You're right, that makes no sense"
BTW I'm a new subscriber. Love the content :)
I appreciate the support brotha ✊
The "Scary" thing: Yes, what is that? LOL So annoying! "Relationship Pragmatics": in my late twenties, I developed a questionnaire that I committed to memory so I would just start weeding out non-partners from the first date - LOL! People who thought the questions were too much or weird? - Self-select out! That was so helpful and pragmatic. At some point I met someone who said, "Wait, I feel like I'm being interviewed, do you have a list of questions or something? That's weird, but it makes a lot of sense. Let me see it." Eventually I provided a print copy and he actually filled it out: that was 30 years ago. Oh - he's an INFJ, its the best!
Don't keep us in suspense, did you end up getting together with the INFJ?! 🍿
@@justcallmejon22 LOL - we met November 1993, started dating in November 1994, and married August 1995. That's 30 years of conversations like:
Me: why does that bother you, why do you care what they think?
Him: I don't care what they THINK
Me: yes you do, you are twisting yourself into a pretzel here, just figure out what works and move on...
Him: I just want everyone to feel....(insert the appropriate feeling).
Me: but why do you care?
LOL my INFJ has a nearly infinite
level of patience and kindness. The best part is the companionship of parallel play - he does his stuff in one room and I do mine in another, and nobody has hurt feelings or complains about being neglected.
Hearing your story made me cry. I'm an INFP woman and my ex is an INTJ. We broke up a few weeks ago and days after the breakup he told me that he's INTJ so maybe knowing that information can help me understand him better. Right after he told me I spent most of my time learning about INTJs.
Just thinking about him going through the same thing as you did makes me want to comfort him but now I doubt if he would even want that from me anymore. We no longer talk but I message him from time to time to let him know that I'm still here for him.
I genuinely love him and I adore him. We were together for 3 months but I did my best to really understand him and get to know him. I wish I knew about his INTJ personality before we broke up.
I think INTJs are amazing people and are most worthy of care and understanding. 💝
Thank you, for caring for him even after the break up. It's not your responsibility to comfort him but you'll know that you hold a special place in his heart if he goes to you for comfort ❤
@@justcallmejon22 I appreciate the advice. Your channel is a big help in understanding INTJs more. :)
Wow, this is spot on!! Love one punch man
✊😶
BROO THANK YOU SO MUCH !! ♥️♥️
✊
It's really hard to comment on this one. I've spent my entire life feeling "accidentally outsider", with people always misinterpreting everything I did, I said, I was. Thank you so much for this video, there's so much I could say about it, but I know you already know 😄 just thanks.
No need to say much, I understand ✊
Thanks! I feel a lot of refusal at work and in private life. My standards are high, I know, but I also think that people don’t want to know certain details/things and are not reliable.
It still stings when I'm misunderstood by the people that I care about but I've learned that being misunderstood is part of life. I'm not sure where you are in your journey but I'm rooting for you fellow INTJ ✊
I quickly wanted to say that, I have found all your videos on the INTJ topic extremely interesting. Thank you for your efforts. Hope everything is well.
Thank you, I appreciate the support 🙏
Me and my INFP mom really struggle. I've screwed up and she's screwed up, and we've both been through traumatic situations and handled them differently. Her at-times hypersensitivity and conflict-aversion combined with my bumbling blind Fe and tendency to withdraw have fed off eachother and pile on the misunderstandings. I hate this wall that's there.
I have an INFP older sister and that's how our relationship was for years until we both matured. I understand your struggle and I hope that you two work things out soon ✊
I try to explain this to people so they can understand me better, but like you said, it rarely works. I had 1 best friend and 2 cousins that I could be myself with and not worry about being judged or misunderstood, but sadly they all died recently. I started trying to connect with my brothers and family for the first time, and my mind was blown as to how they see me. My only real relationship was with an INFP. However, I’m not sure I feel sad about my life. Hard to tell because I see myself from various perspectives but rarely 1st. I detached from myself when I was a kid and rarely snap into 1st perspective anymore, only when I’m very frustrated or rare times of “falling in love.” As an outsider looking in, I look strong and happy. As myself, I’m happy and full of life, yet chronically sad. I have lots of friends yet I’m completely alone. It’s just full of contradictory elements as if I’m living multiple parallel lives all connected to a central database.
My condolences for you and your loved ones for the loss of your best friend and cousins. I hope you're all doing well. It really is interesting how easily detached we are from our own bodies and how difficult it is to explain the multiple realities that we are able to live in at the same time. I hear you and I hope you know that you're not alone fellow INTJ Queen 👑
Thank you!
Exactly, I was told that I needed to be humbled…..
For something that I knew was true at that….
Thank you! This helps
I hope that you keep speaking your truth! The worst thing I hear about is an INTJ that loses their voice from constantly being told to be humble 😕
Me LK shedding a tear @10:25 - 10:51 that maybe one day someone will get me. IT feels like being an female INTJ makes it worse because women are already too emotional to get me and men see me as not friendly enough or too tough. My own mother says I'm uncaring and rude lol.
Yep - my mother used to call me a robot when I was little and was deliberately cruel to me to get an emotional reaction. As if that would make me feel safer about being vulnerable ... :) She was not alone in doing this, so it made for a very confusing childhood.
@@jillross6331 That's so true, I'm always trying to help my mother do things more efficiently and that makes me an "ass". I'm fairly certain she's an ESTJ, so she does A LOT but it never seems to be for any set goal. She's like someone sitting in a rocking chair rocking, rocking, rocking but not getting anywhere...Busy works annoys me I'd rather sit and think about how to fix stuff or make it better than to just do "something" with no real reason or goal. We just clash so bad, because like your mom doing things to irritate you my mom has always been VERY passive aggressive.
You're not alone my fellow INTJ Queen 👑
@@justcallmejon22 Ty 💚.
dont give up. intp/infp/infj-s are the ones that allmost get me, and it feels good, to not beeing completely misunderstood. 🥲and yeah... it makes me realy angry, that society has that opinion, how women should be... 🤬
This was pretty good - top 10% for intj content. On the greater 1/2 for you 👍
Thank you, I appreciate the kind words 🙏
I’m an INTJ…My focus leans towards illuminating “New Information” into whatever environment that I’m in. This is a subconscious state of being for me…there have been plenty of times where I didn’t realize the “newness” of what I was expressing until I got the deer in the headlights stare - of course the majority of people will not understand this. When I get the stare I use my wit (which always seems to be handy) and crack a joke. It’s not so much that I don’t care about being misunderstood as it is a wonderful opportunity to laugh.
Your videos on INTJ are awesome.
Humor is the best way to make things not awkward! I'm glad to hear that you've developed that response, a lot of INTJs haven't and it was night & day for me once I developed it myself 😂
Thank you for making this video - and your positive outro! And yes I can relate to your struggles, absolutely.
My INFJ - check; 25 years friendship
My INFP - check; my father in law (and my mother in law ENFP... has absolutely played a role in my wife's mate selection process)
My I(?)NTP - check; my ENTP business partner buddy
Finding is still reserved for those who search so go out there and meet many people, knowing you will only truly connect to 1% of them: you need more numbers.
Anything that matters is definitely a numbers game and a lot of luck 🙃
Oh my goodness this is amazing. I found you today after finding out I’m an infp and my husband is intj. I instantly feel less judged by him🤣🤣
One of the best pairing! Please take care of my INTJ brother ✊