Louis C.K - Being Selfish

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 20 вер 2024
  • Please support Louis and his work: LouisCK.com
    #louie #louisck #standupcomedy #comedian #standup #standupcomedian #standupcomedians #comedyshorts #joerogan #davechappelle #comedyclub #shorts #patriceoneal #billburr #normmacdonald #ymh #tomsegura #yourmomshouse #theovon #comedyclips
    Full Credit to Louis C.K's show "Louie"

КОМЕНТАРІ • 255

  • @carrrrrrrlos3306
    @carrrrrrrlos3306 Рік тому +130

    Louis CK is basically the only comedian that consistently makes me belly laugh, hard.

  • @justdriveon
    @justdriveon Рік тому +24

    This stuff is really quite philosophical and I love how he does it!

  • @sixfootben4892
    @sixfootben4892 Рік тому +42

    I used to work at hertz and this happened all the time.

  • @shortlivedglory3314
    @shortlivedglory3314 Рік тому +6

    Tried this once. They charged me for picking it up. Cost more than the flight.

  • @cobraofearth
    @cobraofearth Рік тому +2

    haha! When that dog put his paw on his shoulder, like “it’s ok human”

  • @MrSenChoi
    @MrSenChoi Рік тому +10

    This is one of the best of his. Lol

  • @tarot-karma-online
    @tarot-karma-online Рік тому +5

    Years ago there was a public holiday in Ireland with no buses to airport. I had to do the same,get rental car and leave it in Kerry cause taxi would have been more expesive, so I thought ... I called them from Germany and said your car is in the parking, keys inside. They said thank you for sharing the information. We have to send somebody out, that makes 300 euro :) Lesson learned but at the time, I did not mind, cause it really helped me.

  • @diligentsun1154
    @diligentsun1154 3 місяці тому

    'it doesn't have any bacon on it...'

  • @Trav_Can
    @Trav_Can Рік тому +12

    6:53 There's always gonna be that...

  • @M3atP0psicl35
    @M3atP0psicl35 Рік тому +39

    I think these commenters believe Lou will read how funny their comments are and fast track them to stardom.

    • @gunkanjima3408
      @gunkanjima3408 Рік тому

      It’s the 2023 version of giving a rapper a cassette tape 😂

    • @vicsville760
      @vicsville760 Рік тому +1

      No one Thinks that, Brian

    • @cloudmaster182
      @cloudmaster182 Рік тому

      ​@Gunkanjima it's more like typing a fire verse in the comment section of a lil wayne instrumental

    • @logann7942
      @logann7942 Рік тому

      They aren’t as cool as you, I mean you call him “Lou” bc you’re such good friends.

    • @SophiaAphrodite
      @SophiaAphrodite Рік тому

      The guy was such a prick he tried to get Pete Davidsin fired for smoking weed.

  • @BrienAhern
    @BrienAhern Рік тому +1

    Crickets actually hop backwards if you look closely

  • @lawrencemaweu
    @lawrencemaweu Рік тому +12

    You should act in a way, that if everyone acted the same, everything would work out

    • @jackjones6849
      @jackjones6849 Рік тому +4

      This is basically exactly what Immanuel Kant said about how to live.

    • @keykrazy
      @keykrazy Рік тому +3

      @@jackjones6849 Kant's Categorical Imperative, if memory serves

    • @lonnielynn9566
      @lonnielynn9566 Рік тому

      That's a Louie quote right?

    • @joeking6972
      @joeking6972 Рік тому +5

      "Which BRINGS me to fucking Kant..."

    • @lawrencemaweu
      @lawrencemaweu Рік тому

      @@joeking6972 😲calm down

  • @tripwilliam47
    @tripwilliam47 Рік тому +12

    Another example of AI bots taking over youtube. All social media, the entire internet even has been compromised. You are now soon to be truly alone on the web.

  • @thecollection3643
    @thecollection3643 Рік тому +5

    Did you know the earth is flat when you stand on it?

    • @thecollection3643
      @thecollection3643 Рік тому +1

      Unless you’re standing on a mountain, then it’s not flat. But most of the time it’s flat

    • @thecollection3643
      @thecollection3643 Рік тому +5

      I likes my own comments because I’m lonely

    • @Brotheroppi
      @Brotheroppi Рік тому

      ​@@thecollection3643 fair, here take another

    • @KayGee-sp6xm
      @KayGee-sp6xm Рік тому

      Did you know that the world is actually upside down, stand on your head and you'll find out the truth. #realeyesrealizereallies...

  • @uchibenkei
    @uchibenkei Рік тому +1

    we do go overboard with trying to save everything. i've seen chickens in wheelchairs walking around. you know what? just eat that one. it's ok if we just eat it.

  • @franzbeckenbauer2374
    @franzbeckenbauer2374 Рік тому +2

    I should study for my ap psychology test and not watch tractor tutorials

  • @capslockcapable1719
    @capslockcapable1719 Рік тому

    4:18 "It's been towed beyond the environment."
    iykyk

  • @ilovemelodyjane
    @ilovemelodyjane Рік тому +3

    Oh. I thank him for this "favorite things" but, it has given me answers to others entitled behavior for years. 👀

  • @isaiahfreeman725
    @isaiahfreeman725 Рік тому +1

    Let’s do a roast pheasant

  • @chetsamuels4307
    @chetsamuels4307 Рік тому +43

    Why put ads in the middle of a standup clip, I’m never watching this channel again now

    • @MelancholicFools
      @MelancholicFools Рік тому +7

      Lol, I didn’t get one

    • @nololol
      @nololol Рік тому

      you're stupid and dont use an adblock sounds like a you problem

    • @AlkaRez
      @AlkaRez Рік тому +3

      I be doing the same thing. Never forgive!

    • @ocshine.detailing
      @ocshine.detailing Рік тому +1

      Was only 1 ya selfish white fuck!! 🤣🤣

    • @slaysimple9383
      @slaysimple9383 Рік тому +3

      Aww shit, what are we gonna do now!

  • @Searching4DMT
    @Searching4DMT Рік тому +1

    Top 5 comics of all time

  • @dearbrad1996
    @dearbrad1996 Рік тому +4

    I agree with another commenter, IE, what are these comments about? Are they from other videos? Or do they think you just comment on anything

  • @hakuamper365
    @hakuamper365 Рік тому +2

    Theres is actually a video of a lady if California getting out of a moving car LOL.

  • @thomaspearce8271
    @thomaspearce8271 Рік тому

    Ok I’ll play. “ blah blah blah “

  • @jocu475
    @jocu475 Рік тому +19

    This is like 10 years old at this point

    • @ckw8723
      @ckw8723 Рік тому

      couple more years n it'll be too old to f*c/*--......

    • @ilovemybuddythunder
      @ilovemybuddythunder Рік тому +5

      It's still relevant though..

  • @bert1913
    @bert1913 Рік тому +13

    "this is all of my lotion and you can't have any of it"

  • @dickbaggins-bc6hs
    @dickbaggins-bc6hs Рік тому +17

    Madd Miggs throws out the first pitch of the game

    • @skelter1153
      @skelter1153 Рік тому

      Multiple Miggs.
      Silence-O-The Lambs.

    • @dickbaggins-bc6hs
      @dickbaggins-bc6hs Рік тому

      There once was a man named darth plagus the wise and he was powerfull that he could stave off death.

    • @dickbaggins-bc6hs
      @dickbaggins-bc6hs Рік тому

      But super cereal loui ck is pervy weirdo sex offender (hes a jazz tosser) who likes crackin wise on parkland shooting survivors.

  • @oddgoblin1400
    @oddgoblin1400 Рік тому +27

    The thing about Denzel Washington is his way of acting comes across as very very authentic or real

    • @nak3dxsnake
      @nak3dxsnake Рік тому +3

      He also bring a lot of Denzel to the roles haha.

  • @Anabsurdsuggestion
    @Anabsurdsuggestion Рік тому +2

    Excellent upload.

  • @Benbobr
    @Benbobr Рік тому +164

    Whats the deal with this comment section

  • @golhandincmen
    @golhandincmen Рік тому +4

    I never even tried to finish a whole pizza before.

  • @Yiilks
    @Yiilks Рік тому +4

    i like the way this was !

  • @LankyMF
    @LankyMF Рік тому +1

    Bruv these comments must be AI generated, what the fuck is this. Good content though.

  • @owenrees7544
    @owenrees7544 Рік тому +3

    Surely that forfeits your deposit if you just leave it like that?

  • @val_de_mez
    @val_de_mez Рік тому

    This is totally about americans. 😂
    Not most people, most americans.

  • @Clem_lippin
    @Clem_lippin Рік тому

    Did he really steal Jim Gaffigan’s Indian joke?

  • @Zoetstok
    @Zoetstok Рік тому +1

    What about the deposit?

  • @trevordallas
    @trevordallas Рік тому +3

    Louis, when he is on, is hands down one of the best comedians of all time. It's hard to top Carlin, so let's not even try. Aside from Carlin and Bill Burr, Louis is stunningly real and hilarious. Louis is like the "California Gold Rush." Sure, there was a ton of drama and problems with the era, but the end result was fucking Gold!

    • @jaysilverstone7221
      @jaysilverstone7221 Рік тому +1

      have you seen stewart lee

    • @trevordallas
      @trevordallas Рік тому

      @@jaysilverstone7221 No, but that's where I'm headed now.

    • @jaysilverstone7221
      @jaysilverstone7221 Рік тому

      It may take a while for you to find a bit of his that really works for you but it's worth the effort. If you can find the entire "content provider" it's really high art. The wtf podcast will give you insight into his history and approach. Enjoy

    • @AtagoSKK
      @AtagoSKK Рік тому +3

      Never agreed so much. Those three occupy the same region in my mind, scathingly critical but comical observation of society. Carlin is a legend and he was a brilliant mind as any even late into his career. Bill Burr feels more wholesome and likable but peak Louis was second to none, had me laughing in some dark times.

    • @jaysilverstone7221
      @jaysilverstone7221 Рік тому +1

      @@AtagoSKK try Stewart Lee, more sardonic but one of the best

  • @asilver50
    @asilver50 Рік тому +4

    This was funny. I laughed until I stopped. I still don't understand why American football has 15 minute quarters, but NBA games have 12 minute quarters.

  • @CAPrato
    @CAPrato Рік тому +5

    I disagree. I think Margaret Thatcher was an excellent Prime Minister.

  • @timg3679
    @timg3679 Рік тому

    If bakeries made yeast infection pussy bread, would they tell if the yeast was locally produced as to make it eco?

  • @royalew1thcheese
    @royalew1thcheese Рік тому +2

    It's crazy extremist leftists tried to cancel this man... Dude was on your side.... Except rationale

    • @Randy58-zn4ez
      @Randy58-zn4ez Рік тому +3

      It’s crazy that some people bring politics into everything 😂

    • @royalew1thcheese
      @royalew1thcheese Рік тому

      @@Randy58-zn4ez It's crazy some people are so blind unless they go woke 🤣

  • @altonstevens1294
    @altonstevens1294 Рік тому +7

    I've seen the small town bit, but I think Louis would like a small town. Granted your urge to prioritize your convenience over other people is funnier than being courteous but it makes for a better life.

  • @aidassko
    @aidassko Рік тому +5

    I'm Not Louis is a real Louis? Same like I'm not Norm is a real Norm?

    • @ImNotLouis
      @ImNotLouis  Рік тому +11

      I’m Not Louis and I’m Not Norm is Louis and Norm at the same time! Bet you didn’t expect that!

    • @aidassko
      @aidassko Рік тому

      @@ImNotLouis Norm MacDonald and Louis CK are incredibly talented comedians who make me laugh really hard. Rest in peace, Norm, and Louis, please try to maintain a healthy diet, you fat f....

  • @skmo7072
    @skmo7072 Рік тому +9

    I bet he got a massive fine from hertz

    • @lens_hunter
      @lens_hunter Рік тому +5

      Either that, or they banned him. Or both.

    • @crazyharmless666
      @crazyharmless666 Рік тому +1

      If you believe he actually did this youre stupid lol

    • @lens_hunter
      @lens_hunter Рік тому

      @@crazyharmless666 Also that.

    • @trip4923
      @trip4923 Рік тому +3

      I heard they tried to cancel him or something for it.

    • @SlaughterMeister
      @SlaughterMeister Рік тому +17

      I bet it didn't happen, because it's a joke.

  • @Piercutu7
    @Piercutu7 Рік тому

    But really, no one knows a thing about why the sand makes colors and the audacity of that being said

  • @Igornopolis
    @Igornopolis Рік тому +2

    Yes! All that is fine but taxes in Germany did indeed increase over the last 3 fiscal years.

    • @Canuckhardtail
      @Canuckhardtail Рік тому +1

      Which place hasn't. Thanks for the obvious. Jesus.

  • @alexsavutube
    @alexsavutube Рік тому +11

    Even if we called Indians Americans it would still be wrong. We stumbled upon a continent full of different cultures and nations and we started naming people and places. I'm peaty sure America had a name before Amerigo Vespucci.

    • @ILoveGrilledCheese
      @ILoveGrilledCheese Рік тому

      That doesn’t matter, winners determine truth. We took the country over and now whatever we call someone is what they are.

    • @angusyoung119
      @angusyoung119 Рік тому

      I'm pretty sure being bothered by this makes you the problem. Not whatever fuckin name is used.

    • @joebowl8315
      @joebowl8315 Рік тому

      Oh shut up

    • @patrickvonjanicke658
      @patrickvonjanicke658 Рік тому

      Blah blah blah

    • @RyanKaufman
      @RyanKaufman Рік тому +7

      That is pedantry. If you called a white person from Europe "European" you would not be wrong even if they're from Rome which predates Europe. Calling a Navajo man "American" is accurate. Calling him Indian is wrong, not only because India has nothing to do with where the man is from or his culture or anything about him, but also it's confusing. Indian American is the closest to correcting the confusion, but it still plants a weird term in front of American to denote a separate group of people. Just call them Native American.

  • @CAPrato
    @CAPrato Рік тому

    Which show is this bit from? Can anyone tell me?

    • @babasemka
      @babasemka Рік тому +1

      Live at the Beacon Theater (2011)

    • @CAPrato
      @CAPrato Рік тому

      @@babasemka Thank you.

    • @babasemka
      @babasemka Рік тому

      @@CAPrato I got you :)

  • @ryanfulton8421
    @ryanfulton8421 Рік тому +7

    You can tell everything you need to know about a person by the way they drive.

    • @Hankblue
      @Hankblue Рік тому +11

      What if you need to know whether they can perform delicate surgery or not?

    • @greengenes5129
      @greengenes5129 Рік тому +1

      You can see everything u need to know about a person by what they think they think u need to know about a person... Is what I'd say if I thought u weren't just saying something to be funny. But for real tho, with great power, comes great responsibility. (He said, atop a mountain of pomposity)

    • @backbone93
      @backbone93 Рік тому +1

      Also by the way they cook theyr food and what food they make

    • @jackedkerouac4414
      @jackedkerouac4414 Рік тому

      @@backbone93 well then it’s really hard to pin down a chef huh?

    • @backbone93
      @backbone93 Рік тому

      @@jackedkerouac4414 no not really
      If a cook puts sugar or Ketchup in a bolognese i know all i need to know

  • @SHNASTDOG
    @SHNASTDOG Рік тому +8

    6:15 but actually incorrect. Indios meaning gods people. It wasn't a mistake. And it wasn't a slur. They were very fond of the copper skin beautiful people. In dios. Indios. Indians. It's a great compliment which is why it was not corrected. This is historical fact supported by a letter from Columbus himself.
    Furthermore he is wrong about them being peaceful saints across the continent. They hunted animals, ate meat, and had many many brutal wars with eachother. They made sacrifices, bloody rituals, and were sick with a infection before Columbus even arrived. The tribes were not doing" all good" at that time. Lol so he got the decapitation part right.

    • @greenderp
      @greenderp Рік тому

      he was talking about english settlers obviously, not the spanish ones

    • @bryantparker7390
      @bryantparker7390 Рік тому +2

      ​@Sneakyvolta I think Louis was doing what most ppl do and just lumping them all together as "white people"

    • @joaorosa5656
      @joaorosa5656 Рік тому +4

      It's a comedy show, not an history lesson.

    • @BabyJesus66
      @BabyJesus66 Рік тому

      Nobody cares.

    • @SHNASTDOG
      @SHNASTDOG Рік тому

      @@BabyJesus66 liar. You cared enough to talk shit. Get wrecked Culty edge lord.

  • @henreebee6561
    @henreebee6561 Рік тому +2

    Did he steal that dolphin joke from Bill Burr? I remember Bill making a very similar joke.

  • @tylerharvey7357
    @tylerharvey7357 Рік тому +3

    Yes

  • @RyanTheJay
    @RyanTheJay Рік тому +3

    I never thought the Lord of the Rings would be good but I give it an 8/10

  • @samuelhatlestad6676
    @samuelhatlestad6676 Рік тому +1

    I doubt that there are absolutely 0 consequences to doing that haha. They could charge u a fine and put a flag on your account so u can't ever rent with them again or something.

    • @alexandersargeaunt2643
      @alexandersargeaunt2643 Рік тому

      Lol that is what has always bothered me about that joke. Plus you get a ticket for parking your car at the terminal.

  • @Chaosdude341
    @Chaosdude341 Рік тому +7

    Thanks for the upload chap
    Why'd you upload?
    You just did it anyway

    • @M6cha
      @M6cha Рік тому +2

      What?

    • @Chaosdude341
      @Chaosdude341 Рік тому

      @@M6cha comment followed by reference to bit in the video

  • @DeezNuts-
    @DeezNuts- Рік тому

    Ive done the left turn from the right and the right turn from the left, eh no biggie

  • @starroguex6006
    @starroguex6006 Рік тому +1

    Whatssss the deal with Seinfield bits?! Ami right?

  • @DiamondKingVideos
    @DiamondKingVideos Рік тому +1

    I mean I don't even think Avatar was that good. 3D didn't take off afterward and movie theaters are still struggling.

  • @DaMainDiSh
    @DaMainDiSh Рік тому +3

    My favorite punk rock band of the 2000’s has probably gotta be Blink-182.

    • @LeskoBrandon2x
      @LeskoBrandon2x Рік тому +3

      You call that punk? 😂

    • @dickheadrecs
      @dickheadrecs Рік тому +4

      imagine the first 181 attempts if this is what we got

    • @Tbone.357
      @Tbone.357 Рік тому

      Selfish bastard!

    • @kingofdjembe
      @kingofdjembe Рік тому

      The best mainstream pop-punk band from the 2000's was The Offspring.

    • @LeskoBrandon2x
      @LeskoBrandon2x Рік тому

      @@kingofdjembe 2000s? How old are you?

  • @supamatta9207
    @supamatta9207 Рік тому +6

    Wise c.k. thats most obvious in the forehand lately ... lahnhhhn following lanes of an ideal road, all the emotional steps of getting my car acriss 8 lanes. ,

  • @shazzbutter
    @shazzbutter Рік тому

    808 likes

  • @Moonrot24
    @Moonrot24 Рік тому

    Given that this comment section is going nowhere. I got a yt channel with letsplays and ramblings in DnD. The channel is rubbish,but i need views.

  • @problem_man
    @problem_man Рік тому +2

    Manchester city will win the champions league this year

  • @mastercharlesdiltardino8058

    😊

  • @switzerfamily9727
    @switzerfamily9727 Рік тому

    I swallow socks like I like this video.
    Sweaty

    • @bigtupa5613
      @bigtupa5613 Рік тому

      nigga

    • @paperjawa
      @paperjawa Рік тому

      I thought you said cocks. But then I read it again. Oddly enough cocks makes more sense. I want to say for every 1 sock that gets swallowed there are probably 100,000 swallowed cocks.
      Or maybe you meant swallowed as like this process a bird goes through if it happens upon a sock in the wilderness. I see swallows finding socks all the time. They use the socks in their nests. All the time.

  • @quietreason9667
    @quietreason9667 Рік тому +2

    Is this an AI replication of his voice? I don't believe he ever said this

    • @radhiadeedou8286
      @radhiadeedou8286 Рік тому +8

      It's in one of his specials

    • @CrazyCritterTV
      @CrazyCritterTV Рік тому +10

      And so begins an age of confusion where we can't tell what's real or not. Crap.

    • @quietreason9667
      @quietreason9667 Рік тому +3

      Yes, it has already begun. The philosophical approach, a gentle idea, is that we never truly knew what was true.
      Now we have to discern the truth.
      Over many years, we may benefit from fashioned falsehoods. Truth be told, we have no choice.
      Study the ancients. Logic, reason, pattern recognition.
      Or just accept it as an acceleration of the human consciousness.
      Again, you have no choice.

    • @imageword5576
      @imageword5576 Рік тому

      @@quietreason9667 Eh, maybe, but maybe not. This clip isn't an AI replication.

    • @quietreason9667
      @quietreason9667 Рік тому +1

      ChatGPT4 goes live very soon. All boundaries will dissolve. The real and the imagined. We will live together, our fictions, our loves, our horrors. Together.
      As above, so below.

  • @greengenes5129
    @greengenes5129 Рік тому +4

    One can see everything one needs to know about a (hu)man by what (s)he thinks (s)he thinks u need to know about a person... Is what I'd say, if the spoken word had an extra dimension or 3... Seriously tho, with great power comes great responsibility. (He said atop a mountain ~consisting primarily~ of pomposity) Or can one...

    • @BillyMcBean.
      @BillyMcBean. Рік тому +12

      These bots are making no sense

    • @tripwilliam47
      @tripwilliam47 Рік тому

      I hope so, or someone is having a stroke.

  • @maxjames8764
    @maxjames8764 Рік тому +1

    Obviously, he knows not everything about the Christian worldview. 😂 maybe some judge mental assholes who call themselves Christians. But for people that actually read the book
    We are commanded to look after the earth… We just don’t worship it …We are also told to be thankful for salvation, and not treat everybody else like shit because they don’t believe the way we do. Love, Louis, though he’s one of my faves.

    • @403.FORBIDDEN
      @403.FORBIDDEN Рік тому +3

      He didn't say every Christian, he said a lot of them are...

    • @funkchurches
      @funkchurches Рік тому +1

      You’re reading the Bible selectively

  • @roboticunclephil
    @roboticunclephil Рік тому

    Wow, after all is said and done, all the ups and downs of Louis CK, I can see through all the BS and hype and finally see that this guy was never that great of a comedian.

  • @AndyL940
    @AndyL940 Рік тому

    Funny 😂

  • @tumadrexuxa
    @tumadrexuxa Рік тому

    That hertz Story is not true, they would charge your card if you do that

    • @tarot-karma-online
      @tarot-karma-online Рік тому

      correct. It happened to me in ireland, i had to pay 300 extra, cause 2 men had to come to collect it. one who drove the driver to the car, and both returned in their cars to the depot.

    • @Amer1kop
      @Amer1kop 11 місяців тому +1

      @@tarot-karma-onlineto Louis CK this is basically nothing