This Is Paris #5 - (Trauma) - Therapist Reacts
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- Опубліковано 29 вер 2024
- Dr. Kirk Honda reacts to The Real Story of Paris Hilton - This Is Paris. Includes clips from This Is Paris (UA-cam).
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This content is for educational and informational purposes only. Although Kirk Honda is a licensed marriage and family therapist, this content is not a replacement for proper mental health treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health provider regarding any questions or concerns you have about your mental health needs.
#ParisHilton #ThisIsParis
This makes me cry, I feel so horrible for Paris. She should never have gone through that
same :(
Agreed. :(
Her parents abused her by proxy.
it made me cry, poor girl, so f ... bad, and I was raised by Somali mother with the occasional beating and flying shoes. But this is deep trauma,
@@agricolaregs I would disagree. I think her parents tried to give her, the best life. You can't expect parents to know what happened, if you don't tell them. Just look at the stats around unreported assaults. It's very common to go through something, and never say anything about it. I'm not going to tag the parents, with something they were not privy to.
The parents are so emotionally detached. Who can't figure out that this is totally bad? The origins of their problems are poor parenting and a failure to form a healthy relationship with your child so that you can positively influence them. It's all about fear and control.
Her billion dollar goal makes much more sense knowing this. Her parents have shown that moving and throwing money at problems solves them. Therefore, the richer you are, the safer you are.
@@Andrew-qm5im Yes, generations will repeat the same dysfunctional behavior. It's so important to understand the underlying issues to model a healthier response for your children.
Amen. This^^
Narcissist mentalities... They have no love, its just business for them.
THIS! ^^
My sisters good friend committed suicide the night before her mother was going to send her to one of those boarding schools. So glad Paris survived and will be praying for her healing!
Wow, that's heartbreaking. 💔
Wow. That's insane. I wonder how the family has dealt with that.
Kathryn E it was the night of her birthday (not sure if the boarding school requires you to be a certain age) they want her to go the morning after her birthday. She was the only child so I doubt they coped well with the situation. It’s been 15 or 16 years ago and it still haunts my sister today.
@@phanfamily3017 may she and the family of that young girl heal from that.
Omg. How guilty the mother should have felt. This is so heartbreaking.
Her mom appears detached and cold. I don't know...She talks about Paris like she's some kind of inconvenience. So sad.
i think she has deep severe issues of her own. :/
I suspect she detaches because she also holds trauma of her own from being a child actress (her controlling parenting style comes from a lot of fear and insecurity) and has painful and complicated feelings about what happened to Paris.
Full blown sociopathic narcissist parenting style ... think her husband will pass before her... she’s treacherous and a weird type of ego...
@@umchinagirard1800 oh please.. 🙄
I just caught this for 5 minutes. I literally thought the other woman in the room was a hostile reporter. Really.
I literally just finished the 4th one of these and was sad the next wasn't up yet, I love this series. I saw the documentary all the way through and now I'm so invested in your reactions. I love how compassionate you are to her while also acknowledging her privilege and neither cancels the other out. I hope the best for Paris.
Same!
Me too!
Yes me too. I also really appreciate the documentary and this series
I really don't like her mother
Her mom is not nice person , Nikki is alot like her mom. I think her dad is nicer .Her brothers are assholes.
The brothers are even more neglected, forgotten, invisible, white noise, the boys are poor and insignificant, the lost children suffer too....
I’ve been watching the series... but now understanding what has happened to this woman I am shook. This episode has let me aghast and in disbelief. No child deserves to have their trust broken like this. I will never see her the same way. Bless her.
Dr. Honda, You are such a good Doctor and man. I am in tears, and though it's a privileged Paris we're talking about, my heart is broken to now know what these children endure in these programs. A few years ago, I was tempted to seek a program for my rebellious and defiant child. THANK GOD we were able to get through, assuring him out of LOVE for him, we needed him to open up to us with a healthy and much needed dialog..
It wasn't an easy OR fast process but we worked it out. I will NEVER ever.. NEVER threaten or give it a thought to seek this treatment for my children again.
This is traumatizing to be just watching the animated re-enacted. Good lord, how is this legal?
Did you see the Drew Barrymore interview? She states that she relates to Paris because she went to a school due to doing drugs as a teen and her experience was good and she wouldn’t take it back? She undermines Paris’ experience with abuse and Paris puts on her fake persona and voice at the end because she could feel lack of empathy from Drew. It just breaks my heart and I hope Paris is seeking therapy behind the scenes to also help her heal from this. I have my bachelors degree in psychology and really enjoy your breakdown to bring awareness of the stigmas around mental health. Thank you for spreading more awareness on the schools that exist like this today. Hopefully they won’t go hush hush for much longer.
Instead of sending kids to these prison camps, imagine what would happen if these families went to an awesome family therapist (like Dr. Honda Kirk). So much wasted by going to drastic extremes of sending their kids to abusive places!
I have to say - doing this story in animation was an excellent decision. I don’t think people would respond to Paris telling her story as a talking head.
what i find fascinating is that someone who is traumatized & unhealed, yet becomes one of the most famous people in the world & successful & ability to make so much money
What her parents did is disgusting! Sorry, I have no empathy for them.
Nikki is so dismissive of Paris’s trauma it’s gross
Exactly, she seems so cold and ignorant. Even knowing what Paris has gone through she still asks "Did you ever apologize to mom and dad?". Hello?! They should be apologizing to her!
She was sick of her shit as all of us were in the 2000s
Mae Bo that comment shocked me. Think she’s just brain washed by her parents to believe that Paris was a problem
M S it’s like you didn’t listen to a word this video says and just went ahead and commented anyway
I know. Shes jealous
The parents abandoned her and let her be abused. I am surprised that she has anything to do with her family after watching this documentary. So incredibly sad!
children have to come back their loyalty is endless, my dad said you just and only come back because its family -and that is strange- abuse goes unnoticed to the untrained eye and the naive heart
In our society, there's a huge amount of pressure on kids to forgive their parents no matter what happen. Look at her sister telling Paris she has to apologize... Going no contact with your family is extremely har emotionally as you have this constant pressure and people around you playing into that by not understanding and/or shaming you for not being in contact with your parents.
@@SweetenedBluffer That's very true. It's extremely rare that people go no contact. No matter what happens, most stay in contact in one form or another but distance themselves emotionally...sometimes physically by putting a larger distance between them.
I thought the exact same thing!
@@SweetenedBluffer right. They always forgive. I heard blac chynas mom say that she should respect her even if she sold her for sex for money and i was like wtf??? It's very common to forgive your family after all the hell they put you through because...they're your family...society makes it seem like they're all you'll ever have
Her parents weren’t worried about her, they were worried about their image.
Send them off to “fix” them.
I’d be interested in his take on Passages Malibu. To me, it is an example of the adult version of these types of scenarios....@psychologyinseattle
@@KassidyGonzales Yeah both sisters talked about things being swept under the rug all the time. And when you hear Kyle and Kim talk their mother was the same way. So that is where Kathy got it from. It sounds like it all started going down hill when she had to leave CA for NY and all the girls there were horrible to her and it seems like it spiraled from there. I can't imagine how scared she must have been and then to see her own parents standing there as she is drug out and they do nothing.
When she tells her mother, I don't think they'd get her out of there. Paris was sent there because she was just an ordinary teenager. It's very sad that they did it.
She is the same way. She is more worried about her brand today cause I feel like Paris isn’t saying everything that happened to her and she keeps saying her brand. Soooooo
Lucky she survive everything, strong girl,her mom must feel terible some time
Paris' mom knew what was going on. She's lying. You can feel it.
Agree.
Sam Montgomery's step mom in Cinderella Story... She's giving me those vibes.
She gave me a bad vibe the moment she started talking
@@ariagrace7431 same so cold
Yup! I was surprised he didn't comment on that. Her facial expressions gave it all away...she knew the truth and still doesn't feel bad about it at all.
I am from Germany and my mind is blown that those camps are legal ?? Where is law enforcement ? What about children’s rights ?? Hello ???
depending on the state, in the united states children dont have rights. they are considered the property of their parents or extended family, and if they dont have any family then they are the property of the government. all of this applies until you turn 18. sadly thats why "schools" like this are legal, because the children within the walls and outside the walls have no rights. even in regular public schools, children dont have rights. its fucked up, but children are not seen as indiviudal human beings in the eyes of the US government.
Madeline Ferachi ironic how usa is so quick to judge other countries on human rights
projection is the american way
Madeline Ferachi my god I had no idea ... this is horrifying
I think that’s the reaction from absolutely everyone from any other country... how is this legal?!!
Nina Sky then you don’t want to know about our laws regarding child marriage and statutory rape from state to state. A lot of creepy ish is allowed.
I didn't know this was a thing until I watched the documentary and I was, and still am, absolutely horrified. HOW IN THE WORLD IS THIS LEGAL? The definition of scarring your child for life.
I can tell you from experience (I have been to 2 of these schools) that they are constantly being shut down due to abuse, neglect, etc. and reopened under a different name. Over and over. It’s really sad & a flawed system. Hopefully more awareness will change this forever ♥️
Same!! The only thing I’ve heard about close to this is dr.phil ranch. Just shows how fucked up America is and what people can get away with. It’s kidnapping?? Period?? A stranger kidnaps your kid and that’s illegal but the parents pay and now it’s legal?? HUH
Utah child abuse laws are an abomination. Anyone living in that state with a child and who does nothing to change the system there is culpable in my eyes.
I dont understand why it would be surprising that the were abused in the camps, like you pay for them to practically be kidnapped. Did you think the harsh borderline illegal treatment stopped there??
Mother jealous of her daughter.
My thought exactly. If they treated her that way in your own home, imagine what they would to her on their turf.
I went into similar school and one time because I “ignored” one of the fellow leaders that was almost graduated from the place one of the counselors yanked my hair and threw me off the chair, put me on the floor and sat on me while I sobbed.
@@pinkrainclouds2190 that's awful. I'm sorry that happened to you.
@@dogtrainer4645 Thanks. What was the worst is that i had the closest relationship with her. Like she was the only person who seemed to really care and listen to me. The other counselors would mock me and ignore when I was sick or in alot of pain and she would talk with me and all that as well as give me pain meds outside of "med time" because she saw how much pain I was in. But the thing is that I forgave her because she was the only person there that was nice to me which really shows how shitty the rest of them were. Admitted I had a big crush on her and cried when she was fired for an unrelated reason but to be honest if anyone else had done it I would have been further traumatized and hated them but even then I was mostly crying because I wanted a hug instead on her sitting on me while me being pinned to the ground. Afterwards we talked it out and I explained why I was disrespectful to the person and she understood that the person was extremely condescending and power hungry and took her status in the group as a way to talk down and all that. Anyways we talked it out, she hugged me and admitted that what she did was unnecessary and apologized. I was actually more angry that she did it in front of the whole "school" and in front of all the counselors and none of the counselors did anything except laugh at me. It helped that she admitted that the girl was kind of a bitch but told me that even though I didnt like how she treated me, being rude to her with not conducive with raising in my level (we had a level system) and that I'd get dropped since everyone tattled and you lost a level at the smallest things. Perhaps I should be more upset with her but my crush was too big to be mad at her for long. Lol
I was one of those kids sent to a “therapeutic boarding school” in Arizona. Several of the girls i was there with have died from drug overdoses in the last 13 years. I’m so glad this is getting some light. I felt totally abandoned by my family and that they didn’t exhaust other options first.
My first therapist there was a male therapist. My first session with him he asked me for the names & ages of each sexual partner I’ve been with and which sex acts I committed with them. I was only 16! I refused and felt it was totally unnecessary and creepy. I was punished with work hours. All I learned was to be manipulative in order to get out of that place.
Glad you understood the system and used it at your favor. It feels that those camps are to completely destroy what's left in those kids.
Hope you are doing well. Virtual hug.
Omg that's so fucked up! I really feel for you
Omg what a perv!!! Why doesn’t anyone shut these systems down?
@@evae.9424 one word : money
I have a friend that went to one of those wilderness camps and it really traumatized her. There were abusive and withheld food for punishment.
And in your case, that pisses me off that that make “therapist” asked you those question! How fucking inappropriate. Instead of trying to help you he wanted the details and sounds like wanted to shame you. Horrible. I’m glad you were smart enough to not answer his questions.
My daughter just said "why does that man look like Ariel's husband?" Lmao 🤣
I guess you look like Prince Eric here 🤴
Price Eric!!! I love that
Just reading this comment resulted in me getting Under the Sea stuck in my head 😄
Omg I just noticed that and he has the white shirt 🤣
😂😂 Aweee❤🤴
🤯😂🤣
this series really taught me that every single person has trauma that shapes them to be who they are, so sad to think so many of the celebrities we look up too are being used & abused behind the screen.
Yes and I think Paris Hilton has always been unfairly "witch hunted" exactly for the reasons stated in this video about how people who are assumed to be "rich spoiled kids" are not allowed to be seen as humans who also deserve to be treated with respect, kindness and decency. It is an odd objectification where people become the social status = monetary value instead of merely a human being like everyone else
@@Joeblogs999 Yes, thank you for mentioning it. I changed it in my comment.
@@Joeblogs999 there is evidence that she wasn't the one that leaked it, but instead her much older boyfriend. I don't know either way (and neither do you) but judging her for that is unwarranted at this point. And even if she DID leak it, that doesn't mean she doesn't deserve empathy.
@@Joeblogs999 Her boyfriend at the time pressured her into video taping them having sex by threatening to find someone more "fun" if she kept being boring and then released the tape without her consent, which she was made fun of a lot in public entertainment. That she managed build a high paying career out of being a pop culture phenomenon seems like having a smart business sense. One can argue whether or not this is valuably contributing to society at large but frankly I think there are many jobs that does not visibly contribute to society. I don't see being an pop culture "persona" and influencer as a less valuable job than for instance running a hotel chain, a fast food chain or a cleaning company. I am not sure why you don't think Paris deserves human empathy for being put in a child prison camp which traumatised her. Is it because she is rich? Or she is annoying to you? Or because she has a job without a clear social value?
nadia c and she was a fcking 18 years old girl you pos. she was barely legal. Also her then boyfriend openly stated he leaked the video and brag around and sold it to company. Before that she was already on the round to her fame.
Her sister is so cold and act so indifferent... like why the hell she would need to apologize for being abuse ?!
Its crazy when the lady says to her sister "were you scared it would happen to you" and she's like no (: in this cheery ass voice. Like wtf? Thats crazy. It was planned, they knew what was gonna to her there and they told the other sisters before hand. If I heard screaming in the night I'd definitely try to investigate. And then wake up the next morning and my sisters not there?! Id go crazy like where is she?!
i think she's also jealous of her fame
The mom is demented in the head. What I got from the series is that Paris' mom only cares about things that inconvenience her. When they talk about the sex tape she talks about how uncomfortable it was for her. Not any concern that Paris was 19 in the tape.
Exactly! No concern displayed for her child. Just how it impacted her own life. Textbook narcissist mom
My thoughts too. And I thought she said she was 18
Wow so true
I was thinking the same thing
i wouldn't be that mean to kathy.. i think she have serious trauma shit of her own.. the whole thing is just sad.. for everyone involved.. :(
Something about Paris’ sister doesn’t sit right with me. It seems like instead of being the “parent sibling” she was more trying to act superior to Paris and not actually looking out for her. She seems to talk down on her.
Because she is. Golden child "syndrome".
It’s also really sad that you can tell Paris is used to it and chooses to take the high road (at least from what we saw in the documentary) :(
Did you notice she married into the Rothschilds?
GCS. 😂😂😂
@@zayribautista8971 who r they ?
I didn’t understand Nicky’s comment of, “You were very naughty.”, considering she was out partying with Paris. It was always reported as the both of them going out together. I have a feeling Nicky snitched so she wouldn’t have to go to the camp as well, not that it justifies betraying her sister.
Worst sister of the year and to think Paris still has the strength to associate with her
Exactly,plenty of pictures of her looking drugged up too.
I’m also bothered by a grown woman still using the word “naughty” in such a serious context. Sick
@@thisisthewaterandthisisthe3254 LOL
I think by the time Nicky was going out with her they were older/after she was taken away?
I loved and hated watching this series. So tramatic yet so happy that she is finally able to speak out about it. Her parents literally had no idea what they were doing to her. I wonder what they think after watching it. So sad.
I do not think they had no idea. Who can do this to a child...... in my eyes...let me just not finish this sentence.
If they didn't know they also didn't make much effort to find out.
I think they knew.
What I meant by "they had no idea" was about the lifelong trama they were going to cause her to have. I dont think they did that knowing they were going to cause her severe trauma. Looking at it from the outside I could see how we automatically are like -Duh! Kidnapping her in the middle of the night is going to traumatize her. However, I dont think they were probably fully aware what the people at the school were doing to her while she was there either.
@@Puuws I think some of it is that she has a lot of botox in her face too 😅 but to me it did seem like she took a second to think. She lifted her hand to her mouth and said - she never told me that. But imagine just learning that you were responsible for that happening to her. You might not know what to do or how to respond either? Idk, just my thoughts.
That school paris went to still exists but it changed owners and they say they're different from the past owners but how different can you really be with that kind of "education"
It's like when the KGB in Russia changed its name to FSB after the fall of the Soviet Union, but no one believes (nor should they) that the FSB is run any differently than the former. Different name, same shit, same terror.
Meh, 2 more minutes of research on Google and you’ll start seeing some reviews of that place, it’s still the same as described in here
What school
Still the same thing going on, you see the other survivor say they have this many police reports from like 2011-20?? I forgot lol but they’re all SRA
@@elygonzalez677 provo canyon school in Utah
Let’s not ignore that her brother, Conrad, is a full blown addict. I wonder what so-called “help” his parents got for him. 😣
Breaks my heart ☹
And wonder why they went this route,family isn’t as perfect as they try to act.
Was he black sheep, family scapegoat, lost child? Rejected kid??
Oh God I haven't thought about this :(
Paris parents betrayed her. Hope Paris documentary will make these places close down. Shocked that America allows this
America allows a lot of bs and always has
Paris's parents really sold her out. And her siblings, especially Nicky, ride on her fame and wealth. Provo Canyon needs to be shut down and the school management and staff there should all be put in jail for life for all the pain and suffering they've inflicted on all those kids who attended their school!!
Very sad how much abuse is only allowed in the US that isn't allowed in other first world country... crazy. If this was happening in Germany I think the other European countries would get involved asap.
I'm not shocked and I am American
This series has brought back so many memories for me. I wasn't a bad kid, just a little unruly in my teens. But my mother couldn't handle the fact that I was no longer a perfect little girl. My parents looked into having me committed somewhere, but fortunately they couldn't afford it, and the school principal told them I didn't need it. When I was 16 I went to spend a few nights with a friend, and my parents asked my friend's mother if I could stay permanently. I was thrilled! Once I was away from the pressure I straightened up. Finished high school, went to college, and had a successful life.
May I ask how is your relationship with your parents today? What do you think your mom could have done differently? Did you straighten up at your friend's house because you respected them more than your mother? I want to be the best mom I can be. Answer if you are comfortable. Thanks and glad you turned out great.
THANK GOD !
@@christinehaynes9368 I think from my own experience with toxic parents, a few of the best things you can do as a parent is:
- always show them love and show them they are wanted, no matter how difficult they are being. Yes if they misbehave you should tell them no, but afterwards explain why you did it and show them love
- dont let fear for your own reputation with your friends/ family or fear for how your kid is going to turn out, overrule your judgement on how to raise them
Kids will have bad days, doesnt mean they will accomplish nothing and will be spit out by society
- never lie to your kids, especially not to safe your own ass
- dont try to manipulate your kids into doing things "your way". And dont try to control every part of their lives, just because they live under your roof. Your kids have a right to privacy and to make their own choices. You teach them all you know and they have to make up their own minds about what to do with your information
- always tell them the reasons you have certain rules, dont use "because I said so". And dont suddenly change those rules when it benefits you
-always motivate them and compliment them, dont hate on their interests and ideas.
- dont "take it with a grain of salt" when they tell you about their trauma, or tell your kids that they must have remembered this all wrong because "I, as your mother, dont remember this happening the same way and for me the experience felt very different". Completely shoving the kids feelings to the side.
Help them find a way through their trauma
- dont demand respect, just because you are older and the parent doesnt mean you should be given respect automatically. Teach them to respect people who respect them back
- and always believe them when they tell you someone hurt them or ask "why they dont want to go to a certain family members house". Usually when a kid doesnt want to go visit someone, chances are high this person abuses the kid. But turns out my mom was also abused by this person and she thinks this is normal behaviour
@@nadiar.4638 Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for taking the time to share these very wise words with me and others. You are most gracious. God bless you.
An eye opener to read this, thank you Nadia for sharing. Hoping you continue to love and grow in your life❤️
i've never wanted to be paris hilton's friend so badly in my life. i just want to help her.
yes, I just want to give her a hug.
me too
Same 🥺😩
Teresita Davis - There are plenty of other people who could really use your friendship.
Ravenesque One shut up
I can’t imagine how any parent could pay two huge men to come into a home and drag a young woman from their own bed
And have the nerve to say it was the best for her cause everything make her stronger
Call 844-622-6705 and they will try to convince you it is for their own good.
Wow her moms reaction really told a lot about what her story might be and who she is. Possibly coming from nothing or also coming from money and striving to be poised and perfect at all times. Now realizing she’s so hardened that her daughter can’t even talk to her.
Ya. I got that impression too
People need to remember that Kathy has experienced her own childhood emotional trauma as well and that would effect the way she views what Paris went through. Kathy was one of three child actress siblings. Her mother was a hard ass in her demand for her children to work but at the same time she was lenient in the way she parented them outside of their work duties. She favoured the 2 girls that made it in their childhood careers and I think Kathy got left on the back burner or possibly faced a lot of degrading comments in her youth because her mum was an alcoholic. The other two sisters are on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Kim struggles with alcohol and substance abuse issues, Kyle the youngest sister seems to have thrown herself straight into motherhood at an early age however appears really stunted and immature in how she handles adult situations. Paris spoke about Kathy’s mum in this documentary, she mentioned that her grandmother used to tell her she was like Marilyn Monroe or Grace Kelly, she was trying to groom and push Paris towards wanting a public life where her mother Kathy it seems just wanted Paris to have and be everything she wasn’t and couldn’t as a child; prim, proper, private, privilege. When Paris rebelled from their strictness I think Kathy just didn’t know what to do and probably lent more on her husbands judgement. I really don’t think she’s a narcissist like so many comments are saying, I think she just watched her entire family fall apart from Her own mothers dreams of Hollywood fame and she just didn’t want that for her kids
Da Reel Slim Shady oh my god! I didn’t know she was one of the Richards sisters! It makes a lot of sense. There’s so many puzzle pieces that make up the whole.
Does anyone else get the impression the mom and Nikki are jealous of Paris? And the fact that the grandma liked Paris and called her “Star” I feel like the mom and Nikki, even if they knew the extent of the trauma, still probably wouldn’t care because they have very active inferiority complexes with Paris
I always thought the sister was jealous,you can tell by the way she looks at her.
Yes the sister has the bitch face everytime she sees Paris
YES! Completely agree!
agreed
I didn't get jealousy but I think the way Nicky acts is a shield just like Paris's "carefree" personality. It feels like Nicky is telling Paris "if you would just be less dramatic/more responsible (like me), everything would be okay and none of these bad things would have happened". -But there's a reason why Nicky acts like that.
I'm surprised that Paris still talks to her mother. I would never want to do anything with my parents if they did that to me
Danielle Frank she will know for sure once she has a child. She even treats her dog better than her parents treated her.Probably the reality is so hard to face and she is trying to reconcile these thoughts in her dreams.Her parents don’t love, their children are props.
Maybe still afraid of them. Powerful people. Even her sister and her sisters husband... scary.
Such a striking difference in analysis compared to Todd Grandes. Thank you Kirk for bringing some empathy and love to us!
Yep, Todd Grandes seemed to hold a lot of previous bias towards Paris and I felt like this completely clouded his judgement
Grande is a drama channel pretending to be not
Dr. Grande isn't big on empathy, especially towards women.
@@ExtraordinaryMachine333 Yea I kind feel dr. Grande is a misogynist. He is also very judgemental. Dr. Grande is a typical passive-aggressive boomer, kind of like a boring and uninteresting version of dr. Phil.
@@marko_jarvinen He's Gen X, but he definitely seems to lean into those Boomer Conservative values. We all have biases, but I don't think Dr. G ever questions them or thinks they are a bad thing.
There’s a podcast called The Lost Kids that talks about a veryyyy sketchy child camp called Cedu, which Paris briefly mentioned.And yes, a lot of these camps do still exist, including the one that Paris talks about at length (although it says on their website they have changed owners in 2000).
I honestly think these types of camps should be illegal based on the research I’ve done on it.
ebraden09 investing in this comment
They change owners and names, but remains the same.
Trump should do an Executive order to shut them all down
I love that scene in the documentary where Paris is sitting in solitary, and she speaks about who she was going to be when she got out and how she was going be successful, and her eye color changed from her natural brown to the blue contacts she wears. It's so poignant.
Noticed it too☹️😭
Sometimes family scapegoat children get revenge
Wow I never even realized she wore blue eye contacts for her persona all along. 🙁
Her natural eye color is actually green.
I was wondering if she wore contacts bc in the animations she had hazel eyes and then in person she had blue. So thanks! I loved this part as well, and that all of her dreams came to fruition.
The kidnapping is beyond disturbing, but to be woken up in the middle of the night from your sleep? For a girl to be woken up like that by grown men...how can you not have nightmares. And I have yet to hear she was doing drugs/drinking. "to save her life" her mom says? From sneaking into clubs as a teen?
My friend told me she was raped by a staffer in one of these camps 20 years ago. When she said something everyone just said she was acting out and she was punished. These places were horrible.
Yes, sexual abuse and death happen even in the "less bad" ones.
There is no way the mom didn’t know what this was doing to her child. Maybe if it was just one incident but she was REPEATEDLY sent to multiple of these camps for extended periods of time. There is no way the parents did not notice the trauma being caused each time when she returned home unless they completely didn’t pay attention to her at all unless she was acting out. So sad :(
She was probably on her best behavior when she got back even quiet so they might have thought it worked.
you wont believe how EXTREMELY ignorant parents can be. once they decide they want to improve their kid they will see themselves as absolute right, positive good saviours doing their duties and they will ignore their kid's trauma and depression as one of the tantrums. It's fucking sad.
Her parents could have found another way to discipline her. I get that sometimes teenagers, especially rich ones tend to want to grow up fast, party and drink alcohol and don't abide by the rules. But there must have been another way to get Paris to behave other than sending her off to a horrible place.
Never underestimate the power of denial, thats no excuse but Ive met parents who have done the same thing
im ani if she was on her best behaviour when she came back they would ah e had no reason to send her to the next one... she also said she tried telling her mom that she had nightmares every night about what happened to her and her mom essentially blew it off... I think that’s a clear enough sign that she was troubled by the experience and a caring parent would have opened those lines of communications to find out more about what happened there.
I feel in SHOOK to realize that these places are even exist!!! I’m not even American but American culture in general really surprises me every time with the amount of violence there :/
They're not common.
JP2GiannaT eh, more common than you think. Not necessarily the average persons first option but still
I know that, at least in the UK, they exists to.
That doesnt look like a concerned parent when they're told their kid was put in solitary confinement
It looks like she practiced responding to that question and having it in her head that she's just going to play dumb. She already knew that it was going come up it was easier for her to act like she was ignorant.
If you looked at Paris before this doc, you might say she was a success of that school, too. Until you look deeper and see that it’s traumatized her for the rest of her life (thus far).
Damn, I never thought of that
@Mackenzie L It's hard though, I've had PTSD in the past, I'm even in therapy for it currently, and it's like even when you recognize that you need it, there's this deep aversion to seeking treatment for it. It's like every fibre of your being is telling you not to address it, even though your logical mind knows you should. I don't fault anyone for avoiding therapy anymore, after experiencing that. It's like even the thought of talking to someone about it puts you into fight or flight.
Mackenzie L Ah, I see! I thought you meant her not seeking therapy in the years since
@Mackenzie L I guess it would depend on your definition of success.
Yes they might taken credit for her financial success, I hope she financially supports if need her fellow abused friends in the dock... they look really poor...
The most revealing part of the documentary was when her mother admitted fear was her biggest motivator, even stronger than love. She thought her daughter could be raped, mutilated, murdered or all three. Her main motivator was to keep her alive. I know because that what my mother told me. Somewhere along the line they forget their motivator is supposed to be love. They only see Paris as the problem. That's where Nicki's attitude stems from. Her mother genuinely believed she was doing the best for her daughter to keep her alive. Its taken me about 10 years to even consider that my sole care giver loved me due to a similar neurotic belief system held by my own mother. There was no love there was only fear, anxiety and anger. Her mothers own anxieties created this highly traumatic situation. What was Paris' crime- wanting to drink/do drugs/party /meet guys/ have sex? Kind of normal urges for teenagers who don't really get their emotional needs met at home. In a parent-child relationship, the responsibility has to fall to the parent. And the parent failed. Her child is traumatised until she can heal past it. I'm that daughter, just like Paris. We were too "wild", looking for something that we just didn't have at home, too young to know that alcohol, parties, drugs and sex weren't a good solution and having a massive culture difference between generations. I don't want to "blame" but the responsibility has to be allocated to the adult. Paris is on her journey to healing and she is helping myself and many others. So for that alone she should be commended. She is a survivor. People don't think emotional abuse even counts as abuse. It does.
Yes, important point. Emotional abuse is invisible, so people don’t consider it. However, it is horrible and very destructive, especially if your parent was the abuser.
Paris: "I'm too scared to ever see a therapist."
Internet: "Free Therapy to you my child!"
Hope Paris listens to him 💓
This happened to me... the depth of this kind of betrayal never leaves you.
Same!
I can't believe this is legal... So sorry to hear. ❤️
Same :(
Same ♥️
I'm so sorry. I hope you are managing to heal from the trauma 😪
I appreciate Paris for opening up like this because i know it's really hard to do so. But I pray for her healing and for her to find happiness in this crazy world.
Anyone else feel like her mom was lying when she said Paris never told her she was in solitary confinement?......I bet she knew a lot...but to her it was "worth it." 😡
Her acting was so bad it’s obvious she was lying 🥴
Yes non verbal clue.. um yes I knew
Even though this is wrong. This kind of place was made for problem children that were overly rebellious and lost causes to society. Children like Danielle Bregoli. But sadly some not so bad children get sent away too, some for no reason either 😔
quietvalerie1 Paris was on the new Drew Barrymore show and Drew went through the same thing. Drew admitted her facility was not as bad (pretty reasonable) and she in fact led many riots there.
Im from and live in WA and 13 years ago was taken in the middle of the night and sent to a wilderness program and after that a therapeutic boarding school. At 30 years old I am still suffering from what happened to me as a kid and have horrible ptsd and anxiety.
But your reaction to these videos on Paris's story has helped me a lot in not only understanding myself and what I was going thru as a teenager but also you helped me see what my parents must have been going thru too. Not one of the 3 therapists I've had had ever explained things the way you did or much less even understand or fathom what happened to me at these abusive programs. So thank you!!
So incredibly sorry that this happened to you ❤️Wish these places wouldn’t exist:( glad that Dr Honda could help you with his analysis!! sending you much love and strength🙏❤️
You know what the parents could have done?
PARENT!
AMEN WHAT THEY DID IS A FORM OF CHILD NEGLECT THE RICH WAY.
We need to give these kidnappers the scarlet letter
I am really glad for all the " Let's talk, what is happening to you, dear?" moments with my parents. They were rough and ended in many tears. but I always felt cared for. And there always had the "what can I do to help you?" Wich let me know it wasn't a "me" problem but a "we" problem and I could trust that they would catch me when I fall. Not being able to know wether people will activelly betray your trust or not ( something that happened many times, by multiple people) must be awful
Yeah that sounds really good. As someone who didn't have that, I always thought that would have made a huge positive difference in my life. So glad to hear someone had it and can appreciate its benefits.
Your parents sound so lovely
They weren't perfect and sometimes screwed up real bad. But you could def tell they were trying their best through their own hurts and traumas.
Lu D Yeah that is what sounds quite good. That they were self aware and that they understood and were capable of prioritising their kids above their own image and issues. Perfect isn’t needed but human mature parenting and care is. Again I’m glad for you that you got that
There are many children that have died at some of those child prison camps. I couldn't imagine sending any child there no matter how "bad" they were.
Where's DCF when you really need them? These 'schools' should be regulated by the state.
Maria look up the Dozier school in Florida. It was run by the state for 100 years & profited off the slave labour of underage boys for the state. There’s a cemetery on the “reform school’s” property. Horrible horrible things happened there & no one ever did anything about it.
Even in the "less bad" ones, there are deaths and sexual abuse is rampant.
I can’t blame Paris. I’m sad because I don’t think she will find healing until she walks away from her abusers
Yup. Lots of therapy and cutting communication with her parents, especially her mother. That mother is delusional.
So true.
Spot-on analysis. I wish Paris all the best. She still seems trapped, mentally, and wrapped up in trauma that goes beyond the incident.
True she does seem trapped somehow. It is like she is a human who got trapped inside a barbie doll
She had plenty of time and money to see a good therapist and solve it
@@tkalant372 Well not if she doesn't want to admit that these things happened to her, and if she is scared that not being perfect can ruin her brand (that provides her with the wealth she thinks will keep her safe) which is built on her basically being a human flesh barbie.
@@tkalant372 SHUT THE HELL UP! HER PARENTS SHOULD HAVE BEEN PARENTS INSTEAD OF SHIPPING OFF THEIR CHILD TO BE ABUSED.
Agreed ! I hope she watches this doc back and sees that she can get some help to assist her . Hope her family also now realizes how deeply she is wounded .
glad you continued right where you stopped and saw the reaction from the mum to the producer telling her about solitary confinement. i was afraid you'd miss it since you didnt watch the scene to the end last time :O
Same! It was such an important moment!
Sharing your expertise on these issues with others is exactly the kind of conversation that I think the producers intended to spur. Thank you for calling them Child Prison Camps. From all that I have read about these types of behavioral camps, that is exactly what they are.
I was a hard kid but my mom always said if I couldn't handel you I wouldn't send you to someone else I would figure you out. Love that woman
THATS A GOOD PARENT. THATS A REAL PARENT WE HAVE TO STRUGGLE IT OUT AND NOT QUIT THERE IS KIDS THAT GIVE MORE TROUBLE THAN OTHERS ITS LIFE. I AM NOT GIVING MY CHILD TO ANYONE I WILL FIGHT FOR MY CHILD.
100% have a higher rate of predators; children and staff.
They have so much control over children. It’s a perfect environment to abuse them. Smh.
The boyfriends wasn’t hurting her feelings. He was getting in the way of what she needed to accomplish in that moment. Good thing she had protection.
Elizabeth Faraone her protection was garbage she needs new security ASAP
He was abusive.
This is honestly such a garbage take on part of the therapist. If someone is acting like that in any place with security like a bar, restaurant, concert venue, etc they should be ejected. You can't get up in your partner's face then grab her like that while she pleads for you to stop it and act like the victim of her "privilege" (right) to get you the fuck away from her.
I wonder what Dr. Honda thinks about Dr. Phil's reliance on therapeutic camps (it sure didn't work on the "Cash me ousside" girl.)
therapeutic camps can be very helpful! very far from these ‘prison camps’
@@emilydavis628 if you watch the episodes (I don't know how real they are or if they're just acting) you see kids being dragged from their bed in the middle of night by dr Phil's crew and then forced to either agree to go to the camp or be sent to the camp against their will!!
Dr. Phil employs Transporters that basically drags the "trouble children" and dumps them in The Ranch
I’m pretty sure Dr Phil has sent children to Provo.
Emily Davis they call most of these place “therapeutic camps”.
I really dislike her sister. She has that better than thou air about her.
Nah her sister has conformed and is a spitting image of her mother, and, her kids are in trouble if they even think about following their Aunty
She’s jealous of her,she use to party just as much as Paris. She found a rich husband a thinks she’s better.
@hello is it me youre looking forthis has nothing to do with the Rothschild family. Nowhere in this documentary are they mentioned. This is about Paris and you're the one changing the subject. Rothschild family are nothing compared to Paris
@@hollyerwin7511 Then the sister should do a documentary of her own
@@lenamatthews5629 struggling to understand your point but okee dokee
If you read about the Elan school, perhaps watch the documentary on that, you can see how horrifying these schools can be and how they control the narrative until survivors years later are able to come forward. It's very rare for the parents to believe the kids afterwards or apologize for their part of it and the parental relationship is damaged forever.
Would love to hear some more about emotionally eating as an escape from trauma. I think people who are overweight are so misunderstood and villainized for using eating as a coping mechanism when other things like alcoholism is so much more accepted. I truly don't think that majority of people realize that over eating is one of the most common coping mechanisms in the western world
Thank you its pretty hard cause I have that problem and its even harder hearing about all the health consequences years later which leads to more trauma. Very difficult to break out of.
Astrea hi, but you will overcome this I have faith in you ❤️
@@astrea5259 You can do it! I chose alcohol to numb myself, and I am now two years sober after finally adressing the traumas which led me to want to escape reality in the first place.
*Please* don't be embarassed and find professional help. You deserve to overcome this addiction and enjoy all life has to offer, including a healthy body ❤️
@@astrea5259 It's one of the toughest things to work through, because humans have to face food not just every day, but multiple times throughout the day. Once you start to heal and accept yourself, the small changes get easier over time. I think it helps to try to be mindful of when and why we over eat or mindlessly snack on things. I also understand how difficult it is to be constantly berated and feel judged by everyone around you simply for eating something. It's definitely difficult to have people constantly bring up your health and future, and usually it doesn't feel helpful to be reminded, but the bright side is that those people want us around and want to see us thriving, but society has taught them to shame us rather than support us 😔
Thank you very much everyone! 💖
Oh my god, how is this even legal, to let abduct your kids? I am in owe... cannot imagine any lucid parent would do this to kid. I am from central Europe. I am not aware of anything like this here. They are some institution for kids who have troubled behaviour. But a judge or social state instituion have to decide to send them there. And that is only last option... sorry for all who had to undercome this.
You should really look up Provo Canyon School. Her allegations are accurate.
I feel like the Mom in the beginning was obviously lying... her response seemed really planned or fake. When the sister talks it seems staged too.
Why would parents violate their child and think that’s going to help anything?
I was at Cross Creek Programs and it’s a part of the WWASP. My parents paid almost 5k a month. All I have to say is that I am glad Paris used her platform to bring awareness to these kinds of programs.
It seemed in the old home videos of Paris as a child most of the attention from her family revolved around her looks and clothes. Her mom and grandmother were actresses and models and compared her to beautiful actresses.
For teenage paris to find a place where looks and dancing and what you wear was a focus, is a way for her to get more validation when her peers were bullying her for not wearing cool clothes or being pretty enough.
That's a great observation
No one could convince me that her parents had no idea what was going on. Her mum's complete lack of reaction is to me a dead giveaway. As well as the justification of what they chose to do to her.
Right! I'm like wait, nobody called Paris? Checked in? Visited her at "school". Like I do more research when I'm buying mascara ain't no way the parents were clueless. BS. If you think it's reasonable for two men to kidnap your teenage daughter in her room while sleeping, you are deranged.
I wonder if the infamous "Ranch" (popularized by Dr. Phil) uses similarly abusive tactics.
It does seem similar
Was just thinking of this!
was thinking of this too. but I think the difference is the “ranch” gets consent from the patient. Like dr Phil would explain what it is first and then offers it based on what I’ve seen from his shows.
Good question.
I’ve read disturbing accounts...I don’t trust the ranch
Could you react to the interview in the Drew Barrimore show with Paris about this? She was in such a camp to and reacted almost judging Paris for speaking out about this.
I saw that too! That interview really gave me pause. Drew has always put out open energy and in that interview I felt such a disconnect from her and Paris. When drew brought up how those schools helped her and asked Paris if she had any positives, I died a little inside as I saw Paris just let it roll off her
@@hellno4475 yeah that was absolutely tone deaf of Drew Barrymore
She was so annoying.
Do you have a link to the interview?
Thats the thing - Drew was in a type of rehab, not a child behavior reform school. It was wrong of her to draw a comparison. The only thing that compares is technically Drew was also sent away from home & separated from family/friends.
But the type of environment each ended up in were very different.
This happened to me when I was 15. I am 31 now. In the last year or two, the trauma of the wilderness reform boarding school has come up completely. It’s so hard that 15 years later, it all resurfaces. I’m so grateful for Paris, for her to speak on her experience is so healing for others who have been thru the same awful events. Trauma never leaves the body. Random but, magic mushrooms helped heal a lot of my trauma within one trip.
Paris' mom is not seeing the pearly gates after pretending to be clueless about it all. Kathy, you consented and funded the kidnapping. You heard your daughter's horror screams and really thought everything after that was gonna be sunshine, rainbows, glitter...
Yes! And she has the nerve to act like she didn’t know. She said something to the effect of “well if your dad and I knew, we would’ve pulled you out” lies! Way to further blame the victim 🤦🏼♀️
Michelle Stice she said it was “worth it”. How despicable!!
I live in Utah, there is soooooo many of these places people just take their kids too. There is a place here called vantage point and kids go thru HELL in there and I know cuz I’ve survived it lmao
LMAO? WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING????? ITS NOT FUNNY
Toni-Ann Stewart let me make light of my own traumas sis I was in a prison school lol lmao lol lmao lmao lolololo hahahahah lmao lmao
I hope you are having a good day! I’m sorry for your experience but your so strong for making it out and being you!!! 🙌🖤🖤🖤
J Marie thx sis❤️ I was tough I didn’t let it effect me today ❤️❤️
@@jamsng in therapy, it is called incongruence and it is normal for survivors of trauma. Don't judge
How is this legal in any state, tbh?
I would never speak to my parents again after that.
It is hard to imagine just how traumatizing this is. I can't even imagine.
Paris was definitely traumatized and it was heartbreaking to watch this. I will never look at her the same. It’s clear to me that she’s dissociating to an extent when she turns into her “character” and a part of her is stuck at the age she was when she was traumatized. I have childhood PTSD and though the trauma was different, I see so many far too many familiar behaviors. I truly hope she is in REAL therapy and getting help separate from her family who seems to dismiss and invalidate her.
Paris never used drugs or alchohol before she was sent away.
I hope paris is leaving her family behind yo
I can only imagine how painful it was for Paris when she saw her parents whilst she was she was being "kidnapped". That right there might have given her the great sense of abandonment.
I remember hearing my dad tell my mom that I was a devil child and suggest that I be taken to one of these schools. I was 10 years old and the worst I had done was talk back to him when he screamed at me for no reason (he had a really bad temper). I remember him telling my mom that I was born to lie, and everything I told her about him were lies and therefore, to stop me from "tearing the family apart", I should be taken to these schools. Good thing my mom protected me and didn't let him do it, because who knows where I would be if she had allowed it. I feel like whether or not the kids are bad enough to go to these schools depend so much on the parents. A parent's normal kid can be another parents devil child. To other adults, I was just being a kid, but to my dad, I was the worst thing he had ever encountered. So these kids can literally go to these schools not because they were bad, but because their parents think they were bad. The parents have all the power to control what happens to their children, and it's so awful that simply based on their judgement, the children's lives can be ruined forever.
the mother seems to have a very strong personality. my mom was the same and you were not allowed to state your opinion or how you feel
MY MOM IS THE SAME AND WE ARE AT WAR ....I AVOID SPEAKING TO HER SO THERE IS NO ARGUMENTS ITS ROUGH.
My mom is like that
We always stigmatize the abusee in this society, no matter their socio economic status. We need to start looking at the abusers and their enablers. I am not saying to continue with persecution of anyone for the mistakes they make, but stop sweeping mistakes under the carpet.
My dad was born in 1930. 8th of 15 kids. He never got out of the habit of bulk buying food, throwing away what you didn't eat was a serious offense and he would mix his juice with water to make it last longer. He also told me he remembered when he never thought he'd see the day gas was 25 cents a gallon 😂 miss him so much 💕
My prison camp was in Kansas until they got sued and had to rebrand. It taught me to not trust anyone and how to manipulate to get out. I had to under go years of therapy to get over the experience. I was 12/13 and my mom refused to parent and just paid other people to try to parent me. I used to sneak out of the house and I went to a camp with people that were court mandated because of heroin addictions or real crimes. The girls that ended up being there with me didn't improve at all and a lot of them ended up dying afterwards from suicide or drunk driving, etc. My mother and I still aren't close as I do not trust her at all since that time, I'm not 27 still in therapy for what my mom did.
I don't believe the mother. As soon as she said that if Paris would've told them they would've gone immediately, you can tell Paris didn't believe her. She probably knew that already and thought that was ok in order to get the results she wanted to as a parent.
That had to be a long ass drive from NYC to Utah too I wonder if she blocked all that out
Great episode. I had no idea these places existed.. I don't think they exist in France, I'll look into it but that seems so destructive on so many levels.. Wow.
I never realized I have so much in common with Paris Hilton 🤷🏻♀️
SAME.
Me too
I found it kind of strange that the mum didn't react about her daughter being abused.
Sah that’s what she paid for.someone else to punish her while she feigns concern and love. Evil stuff.
This is very insightful but very saddening and alarming this is a thing with the kidnapping to child camps.
Have you ever heard of the TV show "Beyond Scared Straight" (A&E channel)? I know you're busy with many TV shows but it would be interesting to see what you think of taking "problem kids" into a jail to scare them into being better.
Never watched it but I remember when that show was on
Wasn't there a child who died because of this program?
i imagine it cannot be effective
kids will just learn to be more sneaky, more manipulative, to hide things better so their parents wouldn’t find out so easily
Everyone else thinking about how the same thing (forcefully taking kids in the middle of the night) has happened on the dr phil show multiple times?
I don't, but I can definitely imagine something like that happening. I think the problem with Dr. Phil and these kind of camps is that they forget that not everything is about rational black and white situations. They forget that they need to look deeper and to actually connect, instead of just pointing fingers and punishing.
I literally thought to myself "they actually took her to the ranch" when watching this since that phrase was a meme in the past. I probably shouldnt joke about it but my brain made that connection 😅
All I can say is wow. The parents are responsible for her trauma