"No one ever gets anywhere important in one go. We have to be able to forgive ourselves for our first drafts." Holy cow this quote is relevant to me. My favorite video from you guys in a while. Please keep up the good work!
I failed medchool in Berlin 2 years ago. My entire life fell apart. I had to move back to the city where my parents stay, because my jobs were bound to the condition of me being a medstudent. I am 28 now, have been struggling against suicidal impulses, lost major parts of my humorous, extroverted personality, have become isolated (I have no friends in this city), alone. I struggle everyday to try to get back into another medical school (outside germany), but there are many barriers that end up preventing it (tuition in UK and US, language barriers in other EU countries etc.). I hate my life and don't know what to do. All my life I was the straight A student. Always did my best. In medschool, while others went partying, relaxing or sleeping, I was working in one of my 3 jobs to get through the month, while trying to pass my exams and have a perfect attendance in university. In the end, a heavy depression and burn-out, ruined an important exam. I failed 2 times in a row (didn't attend the first time and failed the remaining two attempts.. always the same way... months of hard studying, just to sit in front of the exam and suddenly having no knowledge to draw upon.. as if the hours of mental torture and discipline neverhappened..). Now the guys that always copied my answers during exams or whom I explained things, who had money and a life, are wearing white coats, treat patients and tell others how hard they worked, while I went above and beyond my limits and lost everything. I want to be a doctor. There is no other profession I can see myself in. I am lost.
Thank you for sharing your story. I had a similar experience in some ways, dropping out of college after burn out. Have you considered becoming a medic?
Honor Wayson Hey it's just a process . I was a bright kid in Med school too but lost my exams in finals . It took me 3 attempts & endless days of isolation & endless nights of depression to fight back . Just don't give up coz after a few years u will b so proud of urself fr fighting back & treating patients . Never lose hope . Lots of hugs & love ❤️❤️❤️
Sometimes I think what could get me through those years as med student and my early years of practice, what is important is not being a doctor itself, but what can I do for others or for my self if I become a doctor. Being a doctor is not the end result, it is just a mean to do what I like to do. At the end, if everything seems to fail you or me, it is okay for not being a doctor as long as I can do what I like to do. I can be a nurse, therapist, teacher, psychologist, it doesn't matter. So what you like to do if ever you become a doctor? Never too late to quit, never too late to start again. I hope everything goes well now.
This made me tear up a bit... The feelings couldn't have been more perfectly worded, and the emotions are absolutely real. Thank you so much for making this beautiful video and making me more hopeful about life.
Narrative psychology, if anyone's interested in researching this topic further. McAdam's book "The Redemptive Self" is a particularly good starting point.
Mental self-flagellation is a proper problem of mine. In the pursuit of perfectionism, as your recent video pointed out, the sometimes unyielding & brutal nature of self criticism is wasted time and energy. As Baz Lurhman said, "Don't congratulate yourself too much - or berate yourself too much either."
I like this video. At first viewing what I got from it is there's nothing wrong with being an Idiot. Being a self proclaimed Idiot, I constantly struggle with people's compliments saying I'm a Genius, simply thinking that they don't know me at my worst, crippled by my anxiety and depression. But then again I make the same mistake, only looking at them from the brighter side. I am intensely working on learning not to selfdepreciate, and yet my ghost is so tuned on self critique, its the first thought law after feeling my existence. The second law has to be almost equally powerful, maybe along the lines of Everyone makes silly mistakes, and beats themselves up afterwards. I shall endeavor to love myself more. Now if only I could achieve enough energy to reach the second law consistently, maybe I could change the world.
Recently I been feeling like I'm completely lost control of telling my own story, I was surprised how much time I just let pass without realizing that I can make my own decisions. But is never late and when you do that's when the fun part begins .
I remember being grabbed by my ankles by a big hairy arm with another arm beat my naked bottom. That was when I realized that the hairy arm wanted me to be a masochist. Dear Hairy Arm, I've been quite happy being sad, Sincerely, Bloody Bottom
One thing to know: Everything you do in your life is a learning experience, including the mistakes. And another: the journey to achieving something will always be greater than the end result of that journey.
30 yo: This is more like it. 40 yo: I will define what I want and get it 50 yo: That's it? Everything I wanted is anticlimactic compared to working for it. What now...stand around with hands in pockets? BORING. 60 yo: See what is precious and value it. Think "How the hell am I 60. I feel pretty much as I did at 21, except I have learned a few things. I worry that mine bones are about to get creaky. If time actually goes this fast, I could be dead in what seems like 10 minutes. Damn." ... ? Damn. ;)
Every video that you guys make is a confort to me. I love to know that i'm not the only one who thinks and questions the very basic human condition, the little feellings in our daily routine. Thank you guys from Brazil!
I spent nearly one and a half hour translating your video into my mother tounge- vietnamese as your video was so inspiring and meaningful. Please approve my translation, I put so much hope in it
Hi, Thank you! I really needed this today.I'm sick, needing a kidney transplant and on dialysis,I'm living with my sister and her family for the moment but she's decided to kick me out. So I'm having to go to the government welfare office this morning to apply for help. I was our Mother's caregiver for twenty five years after she was hit by a drunk driver and permanently disabled. After she passed I got sick and now when I'm the one that needs help,I'm made to feel like an unwanted burden. People keep telling me it's her problem and not me, but it still hurts to feel so easily discarded. Trying to tell my story to myself in a positive light. Hope it works:/ Thanks.
This video is beautiful. Rejection and failure are hard to accept, but when you do accept it as part of life, you see it as something beautiful. A journey of battles to reach victory, not a journey of despair.
@Cliff Hanley I mean that we have to spread kindness everyday in life so therefor life and livings meanings are kindness for me. Kindness, positivity, helpfulness, belief and faith are all the keys to achieve. (I know this by my own experience.) May not be for you though...depends on your destiny and experience.
I recommend anyone to write their own autobiography, even if you're the only one that reads it. You'll be surprised at the things you remember when you start remembering.
The only thing I feel like saying, is that the way you talk to yourself makes all the difference. And I'm usually very hard on myself, so I'm not saying it's easy. But once you start doing it, once you start accepting and loving your story, it will get easier and easier.
Excellent video. I personally always focus on the negatives in life and beat myself up for mistakes and missed opportunities. When in fact, mistakes are an essential part of learning and improving. On social media, we tend to only see the good highlights of other peoples lives making us feel less successful and valued. But we all make mistakes. We're only human after all. Have a good day everyone.
practicing self love is tough, and it's a slow process, but it's worth it. I'm still trying, but it's crazy how far I've come, like I make mistakes now and instead of my brain going directly to self destruct, I'm like it's ok, mistakes happen
john pardon well there are people out there that aren't happy. I wanted them to know that they're loved. I don't care if that's meaningless to you. don't be ignorant and realise that the world is not just about you.
I used hesitate to watch these videos because the truths within them seemed too harsh for me to take anything from. However, I feel finding this channel was one of the best things I discovered on the internet. These videos are so informative and straight forward, but still offers a profound simplicity. Your videos have impacted me just after a couple months of watching these videos! Thank you.
Thank you Alain De Botton. Your voice is so compassionate, and your message so sincere. So happy to live on this time of humanity when we can reach wise people at the other side of the planet by just a simple click. I feel truly lucky
I love the style of this video. It makes me feel like I am being read to. It feels like a bedtime picture book for grown ups, where complicated problems are clearly stated and placed within a safely viewed but whole and honest construct. I appreciate these videos and the time I spend with them daily.
As a clinical psychologist who uses Narrative Therapy I am so so so glad you did this video following the Freudian and old school psychological models often used as frameworks for life change and relationships. Please use Micheal Whites work for more of this! There is much knowledge to be used which takes into account the socio political, cultural and economic contexts in a time that the popular pop psychology (which is arguably neoliberal and in favour of getting people back to work, like CBT approaches) is everywhere on the internet! David Smail called it "magical voluntarism" i.e. The fallacy that we have the ability to magic ourselves out of the inequality, oppression, deprecation and existential angst without material resources such as access to education or social support, therefore blaming the individual for their own misery. To take it to the next level we can co-author our lives together in groups of people with shared values which can liberate, aka liberation psychology and the work of Paulo Freire & Nacho Martin-Baro. Just like collectives such as Buddhists have done for many years before their knowledge was appropriated and sold back to them. Look forward to more videos bringing these ideas to the Everyman. Thank you !!! Dane
Unexpectedly cried watching this. It feels so seen knowing that you have power, you ultimately create meaning in your life. No matter the challenges. Akin to an artist or author that creates a piece of art and shows to the public after many attempts behind the scenes without others knowledge. Whatever reason family, culture, religion, gender, social class, sexual orientation that is independent of your self prescribed identities that make you as an individual you, like your decisions, inner self reflections, etc. As a young person, its so easy to do what is safe, what gains you acceptance from ppl around you. But to be yourself. That honestly takes not just time. It sometimes means messing up. I just turned 27. And something I learned paradoxically is the process and adventure of maturing but most of all unlearning things actually help to be more of who and where you want to be. Some get there quick, others more time. The results of things we did in our lives got us to where we are today. There is no perfect life. Perfect decision. That is not say take life trivially, but the narrative of one's life value is unique. Its not staight forward and its difficult to know whats the proper decision. That is your judgment and honestly thats terrifying but also amazing. Why? Because with more experience and mishaps you become a more effective and decisive and competent you. Not judging your life based off an ideal stranger's life crafted on social, not your parents, peers, or community. Life is a creative endeavor not a scientific measurement not can a robot replace you as a human being as a whole be better at who you are. Being a better you is all you can create to do, hopefully the product is fun, functional, and sharing and collabing w others is mutually inspirational thru lifes that is layered with struggles and emotions but as well as love
Yet again, I have to bring up my unfinished reading of "High Fidelity". The main character tells of all his past failed relationships, but it's not that which bothers people, but rather that he is inherently boring and uninsteresting. Furthermore, it's good to write your own biography for the sake of your children and grandchildren and relatives. But since it's not meant for publishing you don't have to adhere to any rules. Just write what you remember and screw style. In this sense you don't need this video's advice. Maybe you're a man of few words and describe factually what you've been through. Or maybe you spend twenty pages describing the angst of having to choose between two brands of milk during a period in your life. It doesn't matter. The only true form of autobiography is the private diary. Only that along with the factual context can make for a true autobiography. If you wait until you're 80 to write your biography then you'll embelish and change facts since memories are not reliable and very subjective. No wonder people mentioned in others' autobiographies are outraged how they were portrayed. The human mind is very unreliable.
Keep strong. Dont forget that despite the evil in this world, God is full of justice, mercy and love. Justice said we broke His perfect law - causing the world's previous perfection to be destroyed - and therefore we deserve Hell (like a punishment in any legal system but this is eternal as His perfect law is eternal too). Don't think you fit in that category? Ever done one of these?: lying, stealing - regardless of how small the object EVER, hating others - which is murder in God's perfect law, lusting (plus God sees our entire thought life). Justice says "the soul that sins shall die" - if we break one in thought/word/deed it's as if we're guilty of all of them. Quite simply, living by the law (which is doing everything perfectly) is impossible for sinful humans . The law shows us that 1. We will die in Hell if we fail to follow it and 2. We cannot save ourselves BUT, 3. God's perfect, immovable law points us to Christ, who followed and fulfilled the law in thought, word and deed perfectly in our place. He did what we couldn't and did it on our behalf. He was then sentenced to death on a cross, and took our personal punishment for our sin, paying our penalty (like paying our fine) completely FOR us, and has given us freedom. If we turn from the sins we have committed and repent (pursue the opposite direction of love through Christ) He will, overtime, recreate us back into that previously perfect image through The Holy Spirit which Jesus sends to all who accept Him as their personal Lord and Savior of their life. It's not about following the law - perfectly, as it's impossible - it's about letting Christ in to guide and teach you and obeying Him through His power (not ourselves as it's impossible without depending on His power and instruction). He is our substitute in His life, death and resurrection. He essentially rewrote history in our place so that, if you believe in Him, it will be as if you had never sinned if you accept Christ's death as our own in our place. He is in Heaven right now preparing a place for us so that He can take His faithful, believing children home with Him when He returns. He will ressurrect us from death when He returns, giving mercy to those who accept His love, instruction and teachings in their life, and give justice to those who refuse it. He doesn't want ANY of us to go to Hell and die for continuing in evil and rejecting His way to life, thats why He died FOR us. Hes giving EVERYONE a chance, He wants everyone to take the free gift of salvation from Hell. He wants us to be His and begin to follow His life of love and service through His power and abiding (staying) with Him. So long as we keep our hearts near to Christ through His strength, strive to follow His will of perfect love revealed in the Bible, and let Him lead in the midst of (very certain) pitfalls and struggles, we will, in time, win the ultimate victory over sin, pain and DEATH through Christ. Even if you are willing to be made willing, pray for Jesus to come in and He will do what we can't. Give us The Holy Spirit who will guide us in the right way. NOTE: You are NEVER too sinful or messed up that God cannot turn your life around through Jesus. EVER. Regardless of what you've done or what you're going through you CAN make it through Jesus. If you have any questions let me know x
Here is my story: *October 1st 2003* I am born in Houston, Texas to my 20 yr old Shellie and 23 yr old Zane Hayes. *My life until school* I lived in League City which was a smaller city near Houston. My mom and dad grew up in a small town in Center, Texas which was near the border of Louisiana. My parents moved to League City so my mom could go to college at Sam Houston University. My dad worked as a machine operator for Texas drainage, they digged ditches on the side of roads so they wouldn't flood from rain. Fortunately, my mom's grandparents lived in Houston because my great grandfather was a business man. So I had somewhere to stay when my mom had college. We visited Center where I see my grandparents and my aunt. Mom had a friend who had a son named Corbyn whom I became friends with in Center. I always had an obsession with airplanes as my dad's father was a pilot who landed in League City to get me to Center faster in his own airplane so he was fun to hang around with. *2009 and 2011* I went to school. I thought school was cool at the time and I made many friends there. *2011* During the summer, my mom got a call from her dad, Rick, saying that my aunt Kelsie (her sister) snuck out with friends and got injured in a car wreck. And she was in a coma. My mom and I went back to Tyler, a town near Center with a good hospital. I wasn't allowed to see her because I couldn't go in the ICU. I had to sit with my dad's parents and mom's friends came to visit the hospital so I wasn't alone in the waiting room. That summer, my mom's mother died from stress and because of that, my parents decided to move back to Center. So I moved to Center. Kelsie had recieved a permanent speech problem and couldn't walk straight anymore as a result of the wreck. I had moved to Center and started 2nd grade there. Making new friends was difficult but I eventually did. My dad still had to work in Houston so I only saw him on weekends or holidays when he was off. He and some of his friends were gonna build a house in Center so we didn't have to live with my grandparents. But it was slow. *2012* Rick met someone from New York on a dating website named Lori. She was wierd. Rick and Lori visited each other for a while but broke up because Lori disrespected my mom and they got into an arguement. *2013* Rick's health began to decrease. He got surgeory often and became a slob. Not showering, growing a beard, dressing inproperly, being lazy and peeing into a bucket outside. It was a good reason for my mom to start getting ready to move out. My mom had big news too. She was pregnant! And I was excited. *October 20th 2013* My mom gave birth to my sister we named Brynlee. We were now able move out to our new home. *Febuary 12 2014* Rick died in the hospital from cancer. He smoked a lot which my family begged him to stop long before. Now Kelsie had to move in with us. *2018* It's been pretty solid so far. I am in highschool right now and living a life. Getting my drivers permit and hunting this season. May I wish you Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and thank you for reading this.
This videos make me feel like I'm not alone, others think exactly like I do. While, I often know I am right. I'm human. I forget. I fuck up. I lose faith... But as the video says Forgive Yourself for your first drafts. "Forgive Myself and outlive this hell"- Madonna.
It sounds all beautiful but way unrealistic. "We have to be able to forgive ourselves for our first drafts"....Well, there are no drafts. If you mess up, you can't go back and do it better. If you mess up your 20s, for example, they're gone.. I usually like your videos but this is just unhealthy sugarcoating of the reality, IMHO.
Should I go for my dreams and passions if I have rare abilities and ideas. I can put my all in whatever it is I do. I believe my life from birth to the present has provided a celeb like plot. But, leaving everything behind. Afraid of success. I don't know Any thoughts.
"No one ever gets anywhere important in one go. We have to be able to forgive ourselves for our first drafts." Holy cow this quote is relevant to me. My favorite video from you guys in a while. Please keep up the good work!
I agree !
when a UA-cam channel shapes your thoughts more than your parents
Nishit Dua whole team of professionals behind the scene. read their bio on their website
Nishit Dua probably not your parents probably influence more than you would first think.
Fairy Khamari true dude True but sad
Semper Reformanda lol
Nishit Dua Truth😷
I failed medchool in Berlin 2 years ago. My entire life fell apart. I had to move back to the city where my parents stay, because my jobs were bound to the condition of me being a medstudent. I am 28 now, have been struggling against suicidal impulses, lost major parts of my humorous, extroverted personality, have become isolated (I have no friends in this city), alone. I struggle everyday to try to get back into another medical school (outside germany), but there are many barriers that end up preventing it (tuition in UK and US, language barriers in other EU countries etc.). I hate my life and don't know what to do. All my life I was the straight A student. Always did my best. In medschool, while others went partying, relaxing or sleeping, I was working in one of my 3 jobs to get through the month, while trying to pass my exams and have a perfect attendance in university. In the end, a heavy depression and burn-out, ruined an important exam. I failed 2 times in a row (didn't attend the first time and failed the remaining two attempts.. always the same way... months of hard studying, just to sit in front of the exam and suddenly having no knowledge to draw upon.. as if the hours of mental torture and discipline neverhappened..). Now the guys that always copied my answers during exams or whom I explained things, who had money and a life, are wearing white coats, treat patients and tell others how hard they worked, while I went above and beyond my limits and lost everything. I want to be a doctor. There is no other profession I can see myself in. I am lost.
Thank you for sharing your story. I had a similar experience in some ways, dropping out of college after burn out. Have you considered becoming a medic?
Honor Wayson Hey it's just a process . I was a bright kid in Med school too but lost my exams in finals . It took me 3 attempts & endless days of isolation & endless nights of depression to fight back .
Just don't give up coz after a few years u will b so proud of urself fr fighting back & treating patients . Never lose hope . Lots of hugs & love ❤️❤️❤️
I hope you will be ok!! Thank you for sharing this. I hope you find a way to enjoy other things in life than work.
Honor Wayson I’m a young medical doctor... with 1 year of practice, I feel so so empty inside. Keep your head up brother.
Sometimes I think what could get me through those years as med student and my early years of practice, what is important is not being a doctor itself, but what can I do for others or for my self if I become a doctor. Being a doctor is not the end result, it is just a mean to do what I like to do. At the end, if everything seems to fail you or me, it is okay for not being a doctor as long as I can do what I like to do. I can be a nurse, therapist, teacher, psychologist, it doesn't matter. So what you like to do if ever you become a doctor? Never too late to quit, never too late to start again. I hope everything goes well now.
This is so beautiful. Thank you ❤️
This was so relatable, it made me take a step back and revaluate my negative outlook towards my life. This video gave me hope, thank you.
This made me tear up a bit...
The feelings couldn't have been more perfectly worded, and the emotions are absolutely real. Thank you so much for making this beautiful video and making me more hopeful about life.
It’s easy, I know how to explain my life in so many ways.
You've given me peace I've never been able to find on my own before. Thank you for your work.
Narrative psychology, if anyone's interested in researching this topic further.
McAdam's book "The Redemptive Self" is a particularly good starting point.
Took your advice. I'm reading it. It's brilliant. Thanks for the recommend.
Somehow for me you posted it on my birthday. I don't know if it is just me or this really is the best video you ever posted.
Hello there Lady Irony! Happy birthday! I send you many greetings and my best wishes:-)
Happy Birthday Lady Iron :)
And....yep...I just started crying. I needed this.
Mental self-flagellation is a proper problem of mine. In the pursuit of perfectionism, as your recent video pointed out, the sometimes unyielding & brutal nature of self criticism is wasted time and energy. As Baz Lurhman said, "Don't congratulate yourself too much - or berate yourself too much either."
"Horrors of a first draft" how beautifully put! I shall remember this line forever.
Ritwik Ghosh yes it resonated with me too ☺️
I like this video. At first viewing what I got from it is there's nothing wrong with being an Idiot. Being a self proclaimed Idiot, I constantly struggle with people's compliments saying I'm a Genius, simply thinking that they don't know me at my worst, crippled by my anxiety and depression.
But then again I make the same mistake, only looking at them from the brighter side. I am intensely working on learning not to selfdepreciate, and yet my ghost is so tuned on self critique, its the first thought law after feeling my existence. The second law has to be almost equally powerful, maybe along the lines of Everyone makes silly mistakes, and beats themselves up afterwards. I shall endeavor to love myself more.
Now if only I could achieve enough energy to reach the second law consistently, maybe I could change the world.
Thank you school of life, best videos for when you need a boost in self esteem
not really sure why but i teared up watching this video
this brought me to tears
so needed to hear this
I honestly don't know where I'd be, how I'd be without the School of Life teaching me regularly some fundamental things.
This is one of the best videos of School of Life!
I'm trying to be a recording artist... wish me luck
Austin Esquillin good luck 👍🏿🍀
Good luck, Austin.
Still painting and painting....and writing children story books...
Im trying to be an female rapper wish me luck
I'm trying to be sexual. Wish me luck.
using perspective to balance reality
so meaningful and relatable! my eyes teared up! thank you for the motivation! 😊
Simply Beautiful. ..
I wish you guys had a podcast or playlist on Spotify. that would be awesome
This is the quality content I subscribed for.
I really appreciate these videos. Please keep it up you guys are doing an excellent service to the world
I just lost my first real job today. This makes it feel like its going to be okay
My ideal career is to work in SOL. Currently at first week of 3rd year at bloody university and already a big mess!
Sometimes I think I want to school my future kids, only with School of Life videos.
this is so beautiful! 😭
This video gives me hope ❤️
I love this
Basically the School of Life says 'love yourself and other people' in every single video
This is amazing
This is art.
Recently I been feeling like I'm completely lost control of telling my own story, I was surprised how much time I just let pass without realizing that I can make my own decisions. But is never late and when you do that's when the fun part begins .
This video hits different.
thank you guys for all the videos you made.💙
why this video made me cry
This video made me cry tbh
0:18 best feeling
the video is on point by the way!
I remember being grabbed by my ankles by a big hairy arm with another arm beat my naked bottom. That was when I realized that the hairy arm wanted me to be a masochist.
Dear Hairy Arm,
I've been quite happy being sad,
Sincerely,
Bloody Bottom
That was great.
Great stuff!
exactly what im trying to do
really beautiful
One thing to know:
Everything you do in your life is a learning experience, including the mistakes. And another: the journey to achieving something will always be greater than the end result of that journey.
Keep it up!
If you're reading this, please, live.
I want ray liotta to narrate my life, personally
❣️
Forget me narrating my life story, I want Morgan Freeman to do it
Devon Lowe I'd prefer Sir David Attenborough.
y'all sucks there's no other best narrator than Alain himself
I'd rather have wayne june narrate it.
or David Attenborough
+Adi ya..
I love this
My life is based on a true story
jack amiegbe and you're played by Brendan Fraser
Mine too, I just strive not to be played by Nicolas Cage.
i strive to be played by Nicolas Cage
I am Nicholas Cage
Good. Be honest with yourself, even if it makes you miserable. It's your only hope of avoiding future misery.
me narrating my life
21yo: Wow I can't wait to become an adult.
22yo: Whoa.
23yo: Ummm...
24yo: Wait.
25yo: Oh God.
26yo: Please make it stop.
Duncan Lycan ha... wait another 10 years. 😅
Duncan Lycan you mean 16: ohh I can't wait to become an adult
30 yo: This is more like it.
40 yo: I will define what I want and get it
50 yo: That's it? Everything I wanted is anticlimactic compared to working for it. What now...stand around with hands in pockets? BORING.
60 yo: See what is precious and value it. Think "How the hell am I 60. I feel pretty much as I did at 21, except I have learned a few things. I worry that mine bones are about to get creaky. If time actually goes this fast, I could be dead in what seems like 10 minutes. Damn."
... ? Damn. ;)
Duncan Lycan this is so me. So true. Smh
Duncan Lycan Well in my country you become an adult at 18.
Every video that you guys make is a confort to me. I love to know that i'm not the only one who thinks and questions the very basic human condition, the little feellings in our daily routine. Thank you guys from Brazil!
Destructor EFX I love this channel too idk why but some people call it a cult lol
This video caught me off guard and has left me speechless. In the good way.
I defy anyone to find a more soothing, wise & meaning-packed 5 minutes on UA-cam. You have my deep thanks.❤
One of your best videos in a while
Joshua Pimm I second your words
and I third them!
fourth
I spent nearly one and a half hour translating your video into my mother tounge- vietnamese as your video was so inspiring and meaningful. Please approve my translation, I put so much hope in it
Tạ Thu Huyền Thank you for your translation
That’s so beautiful 😻 wish I could hear it anyway I don’t speak that language
Hi, Thank you! I really needed this today.I'm sick, needing a kidney transplant and on dialysis,I'm living with my sister and her family for the moment but she's decided to kick me out. So I'm having to go to the government welfare office this morning to apply for help.
I was our Mother's caregiver for twenty five years after she was hit by a drunk driver and permanently disabled. After she passed I got sick and now when I'm the one that needs help,I'm made to feel like an unwanted burden.
People keep telling me it's her problem and not me, but it still hurts to feel so easily discarded. Trying to tell my story to myself in a positive light. Hope it works:/ Thanks.
Michael Pesavento I wish you good luck
Michael Pesavento oh my word :( i will pray for you love from south africa
Michael Pesavento 😭😭
Hi Thank you, Do you follow "Steven Jay"? he's from SA and does mostly reaction vid's now. Thanks.
Hi Benjamin, Thank you and good luck to you too.
Did you know your first name means "Child Of Joy"? :) Thanks.
This video is beautiful. Rejection and failure are hard to accept, but when you do accept it as part of life, you see it as something beautiful. A journey of battles to reach victory, not a journey of despair.
Life itself is meaningless, but living is not.
Well said!
Life and living have a meaning, kindness.
@Cliff Hanley I mean that we have to spread kindness everyday in life so therefor life and livings meanings are kindness for me. Kindness, positivity, helpfulness, belief and faith are all the keys to achieve. (I know this by my own experience.) May not be for you though...depends on your destiny and experience.
Well said 🙌
shine on you crazy diamond!
Smiling Iam, Shining thru to the other side. Trusting myself, Loving myself. Unleashing the BEST VERSION OF ME...
I recommend anyone to write their own autobiography, even if you're the only one that reads it. You'll be surprised at the things you remember when you start remembering.
today i thought about Suiciding 5 or 6 times ... but this video made me understand what a foolish act it wouldve been xD
Happy to hear, hope you'll stay ok ^^
Hope your having a good day and live your best life
The only thing I feel like saying, is that the way you talk to yourself makes all the difference. And I'm usually very hard on myself, so I'm not saying it's easy. But once you start doing it, once you start accepting and loving your story, it will get easier and easier.
Femrys Watson we often forget how to be a best friend to our self..
Unfortunately, we do. We look for people to make our lives better, but we need to begin with ourselves...
No one can make our life better, except ourselves. We always look happiness in others, but the true happiness lays in us.
His voice makes me sleepy 😌 I listen every night to fall sleep 😴
that is so beautiful...after experiencing the end of a lovely relationship that is exactly what I needed...thank you guys!
Bit gay
just shut up
Wow Rude!
Remember this guys: "No one gets anywhere important in just one go"
Excellent video. I personally always focus on the negatives in life and beat myself up for mistakes and missed opportunities. When in fact, mistakes are an essential part of learning and improving.
On social media, we tend to only see the good highlights of other peoples lives making us feel less successful and valued. But we all make mistakes. We're only human after all. Have a good day everyone.
KCG - Kodie Collings Gaming so true
practicing self love is tough, and it's a slow process, but it's worth it.
I'm still trying, but it's crazy how far I've come, like I make mistakes now and instead of my brain going directly to self destruct, I'm like it's ok, mistakes happen
what is the background music? it's beautiful
Daily reminder that you are beautiful and important. I love you. ❤
Semper Reformanda yasss you are ☺
Gerard Sass Queen Way God loves you all too!
Thank you, Gerard Way
You too
i don't know what you're trying to archive but it's meaningless.
john pardon well there are people out there that aren't happy. I wanted them to know that they're loved. I don't care if that's meaningless to you. don't be ignorant and realise that the world is not just about you.
I think this is probably my favorite video from School of Life.
And the music helped to make the video better.
I'm in love with your animations😍
"The difference between despair and hope is just a different way of telling stories from the same set of facts."
-- The School of Life
Boom.
I used hesitate to watch these videos because the truths within them seemed too harsh for me to take anything from. However, I feel finding this channel was one of the best things I discovered on the internet. These videos are so informative and straight forward, but still offers a profound simplicity. Your videos have impacted me just after a couple months of watching these videos! Thank you.
I needed that, thanks School of life
Can you make a video on why people find it hard to say 'no'?
It's almost as if this video was made for me. This is exactly what I'm going through.
Thank you Alain De Botton. Your voice is so compassionate, and your message so sincere. So happy to live on this time of humanity when we can reach wise people at the other side of the planet by just a simple click. I feel truly lucky
I started crying in the beginning :(
tears rolling..... I felt warmth to read the comments...thank you TSOL... I always smile when I get a notification of a new video.
I love the style of this video. It makes me feel like I am being read to. It feels like a bedtime picture book for grown ups, where complicated problems are clearly stated and placed within a safely viewed but whole and honest construct. I appreciate these videos and the time I spend with them daily.
So true! Great artwork..
As a clinical psychologist who uses Narrative Therapy I am so so so glad you did this video following the Freudian and old school psychological models often used as frameworks for life change and relationships. Please use Micheal Whites work for more of this! There is much knowledge to be used which takes into account the socio political, cultural and economic contexts in a time that the popular pop psychology (which is arguably neoliberal and in favour of getting people back to work, like CBT approaches) is everywhere on the internet! David Smail called it "magical voluntarism" i.e. The fallacy that we have the ability to magic ourselves out of the inequality, oppression, deprecation and existential angst without material resources such as access to education or social support, therefore blaming the individual for their own misery. To take it to the next level we can co-author our lives together in groups of people with shared values which can liberate, aka liberation psychology and the work of Paulo Freire & Nacho Martin-Baro. Just like collectives such as Buddhists have done for many years before their knowledge was appropriated and sold back to them. Look forward to more videos bringing these ideas to the Everyman. Thank you !!! Dane
That was fucking beautiful
Unexpectedly cried watching this. It feels so seen knowing that you have power, you ultimately create meaning in your life. No matter the challenges. Akin to an artist or author that creates a piece of art and shows to the public after many attempts behind the scenes without others knowledge. Whatever reason family, culture, religion, gender, social class, sexual orientation that is independent of your self prescribed identities that make you as an individual you, like your decisions, inner self reflections, etc. As a young person, its so easy to do what is safe, what gains you acceptance from ppl around you. But to be yourself. That honestly takes not just time. It sometimes means messing up. I just turned 27. And something I learned paradoxically is the process and adventure of maturing but most of all unlearning things actually help to be more of who and where you want to be. Some get there quick, others more time.
The results of things we did in our lives got us to where we are today. There is no perfect life. Perfect decision. That is not say take life trivially, but the narrative of one's life value is unique. Its not staight forward and its difficult to know whats the proper decision. That is your judgment and honestly thats terrifying but also amazing. Why? Because with more experience and mishaps you become a more effective and decisive and competent you. Not judging your life based off an ideal stranger's life crafted on social, not your parents, peers, or community. Life is a creative endeavor not a scientific measurement not can a robot replace you as a human being as a whole be better at who you are. Being a better you is all you can create to do, hopefully the product is fun, functional, and sharing and collabing w others is mutually inspirational thru lifes that is layered with struggles and emotions but as well as love
Yet again, I have to bring up my unfinished reading of "High Fidelity". The main character tells of all his past failed relationships, but it's not that which bothers people, but rather that he is inherently boring and uninsteresting. Furthermore, it's good to write your own biography for the sake of your children and grandchildren and relatives. But since it's not meant for publishing you don't have to adhere to any rules. Just write what you remember and screw style. In this sense you don't need this video's advice. Maybe you're a man of few words and describe factually what you've been through. Or maybe you spend twenty pages describing the angst of having to choose between two brands of milk during a period in your life. It doesn't matter.
The only true form of autobiography is the private diary. Only that along with the factual context can make for a true autobiography. If you wait until you're 80 to write your biography then you'll embelish and change facts since memories are not reliable and very subjective. No wonder people mentioned in others' autobiographies are outraged how they were portrayed. The human mind is very unreliable.
Havta give 'ee credit.
i like to blame myself and sometimes (most of the times i mean) i am too harsh to myself...
Life is far happier once you've realized that people don't have any long lasting meaning whatsoever.
True words, but I guess everyone has to learn this the hard way...
that Tetris part hit me hard
You have no idea how much I needed this today. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Keep strong. Dont forget that despite the evil in this world, God is full of justice, mercy and love.
Justice said we broke His perfect law - causing the world's previous perfection to be destroyed - and therefore we deserve Hell (like a punishment in any legal system but this is eternal as His perfect law is eternal too). Don't think you fit in that category? Ever done one of these?: lying, stealing - regardless of how small the object EVER, hating others - which is murder in God's perfect law, lusting (plus God sees our entire thought life). Justice says "the soul that sins shall die" - if we break one in thought/word/deed it's as if we're guilty of all of them. Quite simply, living by the law (which is doing everything perfectly) is impossible for sinful humans
. The law shows us that 1. We will die in Hell if we fail to follow it and 2. We cannot save ourselves BUT, 3. God's perfect, immovable law points us to Christ, who followed and fulfilled the law in thought, word and deed perfectly in our place. He did what we couldn't and did it on our behalf. He was then sentenced to death on a cross, and took our personal punishment for our sin, paying our penalty (like paying our fine) completely FOR us, and has given us freedom.
If we turn from the sins we have committed and repent (pursue the opposite direction of love through Christ) He will, overtime, recreate us back into that previously perfect image through The Holy Spirit which Jesus sends to all who accept Him as their personal Lord and Savior of their life. It's not about following the law - perfectly, as it's impossible - it's about letting Christ in to guide and teach you and obeying Him through His power (not ourselves as it's impossible without depending on His power and instruction).
He is our substitute in His life, death and resurrection. He essentially rewrote history in our place so that, if you believe in Him, it will be as if you had never sinned if you accept Christ's death as our own in our place.
He is in Heaven right now preparing a place for us so that He can take His faithful, believing children home with Him when He returns. He will ressurrect us from death when He returns, giving mercy to those who accept His love, instruction and teachings in their life, and give justice to those who refuse it.
He doesn't want ANY of us to go to Hell and die for continuing in evil and rejecting His way to life, thats why He died FOR us. Hes giving EVERYONE a chance, He wants everyone to take the free gift of salvation from Hell. He wants us to be His and begin to follow His life of love and service through His power and abiding (staying) with Him. So long as we keep our hearts near to Christ through His strength, strive to follow His will of perfect love revealed in the Bible, and let Him lead in the midst of (very certain) pitfalls and struggles, we will, in time, win the ultimate victory over sin, pain and DEATH through Christ. Even if you are willing to be made willing, pray for Jesus to come in and He will do what we can't. Give us The Holy Spirit who will guide us in the right way.
NOTE: You are NEVER too sinful or messed up that God cannot turn your life around through Jesus. EVER. Regardless of what you've done or what you're going through you CAN make it through Jesus.
If you have any questions let me know x
Here is my story:
*October 1st 2003* I am born in Houston, Texas to my 20 yr old Shellie and 23 yr old Zane Hayes.
*My life until school* I lived in League City which was a smaller city near Houston. My mom and dad grew up in a small town in Center, Texas which was near the border of Louisiana. My parents moved to League City so my mom could go to college at Sam Houston University. My dad worked as a machine operator for Texas drainage, they digged ditches on the side of roads so they wouldn't flood from rain. Fortunately, my mom's grandparents lived in Houston because my great grandfather was a business man. So I had somewhere to stay when my mom had college. We visited Center where I see my grandparents and my aunt. Mom had a friend who had a son named Corbyn whom I became friends with in Center.
I always had an obsession with airplanes as my dad's father was a pilot who landed in League City to get me to Center faster in his own airplane so he was fun to hang around with.
*2009 and 2011* I went to school. I thought school was cool at the time and I made many friends there.
*2011* During the summer, my mom got a call from her dad, Rick, saying that my aunt Kelsie (her sister) snuck out with friends and got injured in a car wreck. And she was in a coma. My mom and I went back to Tyler, a town near Center with a good hospital. I wasn't allowed to see her because I couldn't go in the ICU. I had to sit with my dad's parents and mom's friends came to visit the hospital so I wasn't alone in the waiting room. That summer, my mom's mother died from stress and because of that, my parents decided to move back to Center. So I moved to Center. Kelsie had recieved a permanent speech problem and couldn't walk straight anymore as a result of the wreck. I had moved to Center and started 2nd grade there. Making new friends was difficult but I eventually did. My dad still had to work in Houston so I only saw him on weekends or holidays when he was off. He and some of his friends were gonna build a house in Center so we didn't have to live with my grandparents. But it was slow.
*2012* Rick met someone from New York on a dating website named Lori. She was wierd. Rick and Lori visited each other for a while but broke up because Lori disrespected my mom and they got into an arguement.
*2013* Rick's health began to decrease. He got surgeory often and became a slob. Not showering, growing a beard, dressing inproperly, being lazy and peeing into a bucket outside. It was a good reason for my mom to start getting ready to move out. My mom had big news too. She was pregnant! And I was excited.
*October 20th 2013* My mom gave birth to my sister we named Brynlee.
We were now able move out to our new home.
*Febuary 12 2014* Rick died in the hospital from cancer. He smoked a lot which my family begged him to stop long before. Now Kelsie had to move in with us.
*2018* It's been pretty solid so far. I am in highschool right now and living a life. Getting my drivers permit and hunting this season. May I wish you Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and thank you for reading this.
This videos make me feel like I'm not alone, others think exactly like I do. While, I often know I am right. I'm human. I forget. I fuck up. I lose faith... But as the video says Forgive Yourself for your first drafts. "Forgive Myself and outlive this hell"- Madonna.
I so glad you guys exist. Don't know where I'd be without you lads
It sounds all beautiful but way unrealistic. "We have to be able to forgive ourselves for our first drafts"....Well, there are no drafts. If you mess up, you can't go back and do it better. If you mess up your 20s, for example, they're gone.. I usually like your videos but this is just unhealthy sugarcoating of the reality, IMHO.
Thank you, Alain. I really needed that.
Should I go for my dreams and passions if I have rare abilities and ideas. I can put my all in whatever it is I do. I believe my life from birth to the present has provided a celeb like plot. But, leaving everything behind. Afraid of success. I don't know
Any thoughts.