You don't even look as bad you think you are. If you take the time to take care of yourself (going to the gym, getting a haircut that suits you, fixing your facial hair) I believe you could be a good looking man. Don't be too harsh on yourself man. Learn to love yourself, and people will be more drawn towards you. Hope this helps man.
Dude 100%. This guy is not ugly in an irredeemable sense. Besides everything you mentioned, I think a large problem for him is that he has no reference point of what being "cool" is. There's many different versions of this depending on one's own personality, stage in life, etc. etc. etc. But his mannerisms/gestures, the way he carries himself, and even the way his voice sounds comes off as very autistic/geeky. He just needs a nudge in the right direction and I feel things could be very different for him.
His problem is way more serious than his physical aspects. There is no guarantee you can make friends no matter how good you look. That would be superficial. That would be a plus but It all comes down to being able to connect to people, make them feel comfortable, and being comfortable around them. And that can happen if you socialize with people regularly.
@@prasmitdevkota4251 sure, those are valid points. But you know what helps when socializing with people? Confidence. And you can get a massive boost in confidence when you know you're in your best shape, when you know that you're well taken care of. I used to have social anxiety, I dread the feeling of being in a room full of people. But when I started taking care of how I look, I can't stress enough how much of a confidence boost it gave me, that I found myself initiating conversations, when back then, I used to not even speak for hours unless I was spoken to. Is it superficial? You could make that argument. Is it useful? It damn well is.
If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here. I know it sounds weird, but it never hurts to help someone out and let them know they are not alone. This world needs more humanity than ever.
Watching your video of u talk about how you are lonely, eased my feeling of loneliness U help people unintentionally With these videos Dont forget that
Can't play guitar, can't drive a car cause I don't know how. Man, you do both and this is an advantage for you. Own it! Loneliness is everywhere these days, with all social media, we are more alone than ever. Another good thing you did is creating a community here on UA-cam. Something big again. I'm not good at that either. So yeah, here are 3 big advantages that you have. Keep the channel going and don't quit. You are on a great journey ahead 🙂
My heart goes out to all the physically unattractive people in the world. It was never your fault that you were born like that, and no one should really feel unloved. It’s a sad world.
It’s not about looks🤦♂️u need to feel confident in being yourself (not changing just to please someone) regardless of the outcome. That makes u successful in everything (not only with women). And the reason you are feeling lonely is probably because you have a passion deep down that you are not working towards. Think about it bro. What’s to say you’re not gonna feel lonely even in a relationship, or if you have 100 flings. It’s mindset bro. Improve that
@@adzinsnsek3en887think there are people who are overly critical of themselves to the point that its off putting. At the same time, I think saying, "just be confident!" is bs and false hope. Yes it is harder for less attractive men to get dates and women.
A good way to forget your problems is to HELP others. It feels so good to read to the elderly, or deliver roadside flowers to a friend's door with a kind note! Being a friend is how you get a friend.
when i felt down i usually always either go to the gym or go for some short runs just to clear my head from what’s going on. I don’t know if you already do this but if you don’t i 100% recommend doing it. Also if you already have 2 best friends, talk to them.. if they’re good enough to be considered your best friends they should be able to talk to you. You don’t have to burden them with this information you can just let your emotions out to them and if for some reason you really can’t do this then go to a therapist, maybe they can help you with your situation. Also it’s always important to keep a good mindset, if you want change make it come to you, keep trying and don’t give up. Nothing will ever change if you’re to scared to do it, I had this problem a while back too but i kept reminding myself that there will be no medicals in life and the only thing i could do was by doing it myself. Work on yourself before you think of a girlfriend and having a lady friend doesn’t always mean you should tell them you like them after a small span of time, try to keep your relationship with them and build it and make it healthy, this goes for any friendship to male, female, or whatever. Best wishes man, keep you head up and keep on trying to work on yourself and make yourself a better man. You got this.
I actually have deep empathy for you sir, especially because I'm pretty much the same age with the same issues, albeit my financial situation is slightly better. I recently this year started going to the gym, relapsed but started back again. I know one problem we both have is we self deprecate ourselves constantly, we CONSTANTLY put ourselves down and it amplifies our anxiety and decreases our confidence by exponents. We have no to little self love, this is why for the last 8 years (im 26) all I have done is work/college, smoke weed, play video games. No bars, no clubs, very little socialization aside from what was forced in college, never pursued women , what's the point when I can just get high and jack off, less drama is what I thought. Hanging over my stoned stupor these last 8 years was a slowly growing dark cloud of loneliness, the type of loneliness that changes somebody in a very negative way. I have no good advice to give you since like I said, I'm in pretty much the same position you are spare the finances. But I did want to let you know that you are not alone, and I genuinely wish you a life full of happiness and joy. Have a great day.
@@cameronwaelchli6319 been going 5-6 days a week since august. I’m down 20 pounds since the beginning of the year currently at 210 and I’m 6 foot tall. My lifts are getting better and better. I still have a long way to go though regarding my social life, and I need to get out there and date lmao 🤣
Man I can see you with a nice haircut nice clothes a nice smile and going out and conquering life and getting everything you deserve from the guitar to the lady bro I have faith in you don’t sabotage yourself bro and if it ain’t logical stay out your feelings bro it’s no money there💯💪🏾
I hope you find your purpose bro. keep grinding in making videos, i just found you today and i'll keep supporting you. i'm alone, been alone my entire life really and in a very dark place myself. hope you get allright man
@Street Tool It's okay man, it can happen, I know a few people who are in this situation also, but how old are you, and what would you say is the reason..
I genuinely mean it when I say, go to the gym and work out, cut your hair, wear basic clothes (white shirt and jeans), eat healthy, take care of yourself. Get out of your comfort zone. Being depressed or anxious shouldn’t be an excuse for not doing better. It’s an explanation, but respectfully you use it as a reason for not evolving. Nothing good comes easy. So don’t expect it too. Work for it. Coming from a person that was depressed. It’s no wonder that you don’t feel great while not taking care of yourself that much. When you continue doing those things you’ll see how much better you’ll feel. This is coming from a caring place, not from hate. Take care dude
Build that courage up to do things you may be uncomfortable with. I got the best outcomes doing things when I had an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach the butterflies. I promise if you start doing this in your everyday life u will get the outcomes you want
I think I kinda understand what could be your issue because I was going through a similar situation in the past and basically its mostly about the mindset. Many people are occupying their minds with what they cant have or what is the norm that they should have otherwise they are useless and how lonely it is and in the end we are creating in our minds the hell hole where we struggle. I mean remember your accomplishments in life you can play a musical instrument you have overcome homelessness and got back on your feet even though you are struggling with solitude you still have good friends which is not everyone could tell because most liked people tend to not form a poweful friendships since they treat people as disposable and you dont do it. Keep your head high focus on earning enough money to fullfil your dream of getting the guitar back and doing what you like and then the right people will flock to you instantly. It may sound harsh but if you beat yourself down and the anxiety and nerves and deppression oozes from you people tend to stay away. “We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” Seneca
Bro I’ve also felt alone and still do at times. What I did was I went to the gym, dressed better, got tattoos because I really wanted them, got my ear pierced, grew my facial hair and hair, started going to church on sundays, met awesome people outside of work, build my social skills, got out my comfort zone. I’m still developing myself. This helped me bro and I’m sure you can find something that will work for you. Fuck people that bring you down. keep pushing bro
Damn man. Don't give up! Make sure you have at least one thing that keeps you going. Same happened to me when my friends started to get girlfriends or moving away. Don't let people convince you that your problems matter less because your aren't disabled, have food in the table and other bs.
Thank you for the channel. I like your channel. Take care. Happy new year. We all go through trials and times that changes every day. Wish you the best
Projecting comment you made is correct, they are smart and intuitive these women, they pick up on your mental state and you're nerves and conscious give away a negative vibe and so they run ..
Your not alone bro my whole life has been hell cuz of my bipolar disorder. Never give up on being positive and love yourself. Your a cool dude just live and relax as much as you can. Also being alone has so much benefits if your think about it! You save hella money for example. But bro, your a good guy and there’s nothing wrong with you. Always fight the negative energy. It will take long to cope but I promise you will find happiness somehow!
You got this man - I’d recommend one thing to do, is to always focus doing something in your time beyond your job, that allows you to “level up” your character. Whether it’s in physical strength, intellectual strength, or your community service. At any given point in time, make sure you are upping your strengths in these categories. But honestly, starting right off- Hit the gym man, increase your protein intake/decrease junk food and carbs- it will pay off dividends in your future health, your self esteem, and level up your physical strength. It will give something immediately to level up in, and early gym strength progress is often quick, and it will pay dividends to your motivation and drive. It will reflect in your external appearance to others too. I know it sounds cliche, but this is indeed one of the main things that really do help level up your character in real life.
It actually hurts and pissis me off so much that people keep calling you ugly 😔 I see your shattered heart and its probably the most genuine I've ever seen anyone be and share in a long time. These videos you make really make me appreciate what I do have going well in my life. I feel pretty similarly to you where its a chore to wake up and goto work then coming home and crying for xyz reasons. I can't express how much these videos are helping me overcome my own problems. I really want to see this man build up confidence and overcome his doubts and get that dream girl in the end. It hurts me so much that someone so kind can be treated like utter shit and be tossed around in today's society as if he's a failure. People have no sympathy for you and its truly sickening that your scared to even read your comments on these videos in the fear that they'll bring you down. I truly wish I could be there for your support and help you get by life ☹️
The things you talk about are common to the human experience. Some books came to mind while I was watching this video. Books that helped me and continues to do so. Might be worth checking out. “Meditations” by Marcus Aurelius. “War of Art” by Steven Pressfield. And “Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor Frankl. Everyone has so sort out their own way of thinking, but there are some ideas and some levers hidden in great books written by people that did some fantastic sorting themselves.
I've been suffering from depression and anxiety all my life ( i'm a bit older than you) and the only times i feel normal is when i'm on fluoxetine and anxiolytics. Of course one should work on one's mindset but with these it's definately easier and they make you feel more confident. Good luck to you Man
i dont think ur problem is u being ugly, poor, loser or any thing only problem is loneliness for all men like us Men suffer from loneliness more 10 times than women
I’m a woman and I definitely suffer from loneliness. I think his problem is probably like mine social anxiety/social awkwardness/lack of confidence which would turn people off
@@jomr4249 guaranteed if you went out there you could have anyone you want and guaranteed you’re not ugly like me. Society doesn’t hate you. You’re a woman get out there and have fun but for me I will just rock here alone because I have nothing to offer. Nobody wants to have kids with an ugly pos like me.
@@jomr4249 lacking confidence when you are a woman is completely different story. I saw so many times a girl with low confidence and she always had a partner...
Definitely work on fixing yourself first before taking on another person. The relationship you have with other people will only be as good and healthy as the relationship you have with yourself. 🙏God Bless 🙏 I pray you heal soon 🙏
I could honestly get how you feel. Feeling lost and things never making sense. And feeling no one understands I get it. It’s funny you touched on the prediction thing. Bc I see my self doing that when I’m at my worse even lately when I’m at my best. It’s just how can you be so sure. Life is complicated. I hate when I do that too because you never will know the outcome of life or what is ahead. For me I’m just trying to remain in the present and first work out the issues you got going on and then make push. I was the similar spot a year ago.
Feeling lonely is not about what you have, it about what you appreciate! As someone who don`t pay bills, rent, having a big house and having athletic and healthy body and lifestyle I can say that I still feel depressed and lonely. The days that I feel most happy I do not care about my problems and focus on my growth and hobbies
While I don't have the exact same issues, I'm in a similar boat as you on many facets. I'm planning to relocate to another state and start over because of my problems. But it was just good watching this to see I'm not alone. I'll definitely keep watching if you continously post
Dude, I'm literally a survivor from depression, I used to take pills like implicane, risperidona, olazin, and many other antidepressants. I'm still taking olazin to sleep because I suffer from insomnia (I'm getting better), and take magnesium pills for Fobia and social anxiety. And all the struggle I had was for a Purpose: helping others like me from the past. My advice to you is this, eat healthy, take long walks and take morning sun to charge you up. Read books or listen audiobooks like steven covey's, conferences like Jhon Maxwell, Bryan Tracy, etc... This is an stage that every high value men needs to pass through. I have been emasculated by woman, guys at school threw me stones, and many more things that caused me to reclude myself from my childhood to almost 25 (I'm 26). I hope you find my advice, and I will copy and paste this until you see it, I wish the better for you.
Bro I would rather you reach out to me than to have to live your life filled with anxiety, you got to stop hendering yourself from being great bro you deserve to live a good life as well you just have to believe it bro❤
you dont need anyone else bro. you need to be content within yourself and if you dont, you have the power to fix it. i strongly recommend going to the gym bc a strong body is a strong mind is sooooo true
Social anxiety isn’t rare it’s just some people can go with the flow and hide it better and then there are people who mannerisms and conversations that gives it away. Just like how some people make you uncomfortable or awkward, others can feel the same but you. Let things happen naturally and do the things you want. Meet people who accepts you, don’t lie to yourself about how people treat you and how you treat them. I have Social Pragmatic disorder and learned this the hard way. A lot of my behavior weren’t good towards my friends and I need to be more mindful of others and my some friends definitely treated me like shit but I was to desperate to not be lonely to see it at the time. I had a problem with infatuation before and it’s bad. Girls don’t like desperate people. They laugh at them with their friends and pity them. It just happens. You have too much self pity for yourself. You’re a dude with a good heart let yourself be you and fix things about yourself. You’re always allowed to evolve and change. Never think this is the end for you, you’re 28 and still have a lot of time left.
Psychologist do work. It helps to share your inner thoughts and fears with someone that doesn't judge you. Whatever you're feeling, although it may not seem this way, millions of others have also felt. Don't give up, you're a young man with a lot of time for your life to change for the better.
Overthinking and the feeling of fear of the other person might betray is the main reason it is harder for us to make friends when we get old. But remember, you cannot love anything that you think negative about. Thats impossible. So you should see world from more of a positive light and start to have a positive and loving feeling towards everyone. I always effortlessly made friends and that happened because I always searched positive in the people and found a reason to like them.
I feel ya man. I also got social anxiety n I try to overcome it but it’s difficult when you’re too damn shy n quiet like me. I try not to peak my head into finding a relationship with a girl but honestly I don’t even care. With all of that being said, hang in there just try to improve on yourself even tho it’s hard n frustrating.
I stand in a very strange camp facially. I either look very handsome to some people or very ugly to others. It's created a polarizing effect and a lot of people just end up not wanting me around completely. I never get texted back from people, never get asked to hang out, always third wheeling. It's just gotten completely old. The dreary, hazy feeling of isolation over time is like slowly breathing in carbon monoxide. You don't realize how detrimental it is until it is too late.
man you really should read or listen the book No more mr nice guy.Listen and then pratice.This book changed how i react to things in my life and made me acountable for the shit i did too.It should help you with the situations and loneliness too. me too i was destroyed by anxiety and panic attacks and i am somewhat healed from that.Just give the time work on yourself,do some exercise, eat clean food and improve your sleep and rest periods.I know its like a broken record advice but it saved my life! hope youre doing better!
"Loneliness" comes from within just like happiness. Loneliness is discontentment with the self. Relationships are overrated. The discontentment only goes away for the excitement of someone new to share your life with until the relationship becomes complacent and the excitement exits. Then the discontentment returns. When youre ok with you is when someone else will notice and take interest.
What you need is a mentor, not someone to just "talk too" online. I person that takes you on, train, socialize, have time to meet you. They are out there. but are rare. One thing you can do is socialize, being nice, talking to a lot of people and be be semi open. Its very hard to leave your situation alone, its easier if you surround you with people that enable you. You get nowhere if you put the same solution to the same problem over and over. One thing you are doing very good is working and putting that money into that car. Some day it will paid off.
I really want to be your friend I'm serious I do, I feel so sorry for you and all the pain you gone through, that last video in your car actually made me tear but please listen to me please don't give up keep moving forward no matter what, mate, stand up and be tough, and don't let words and trash keep letting you down, stand up on your feet and fight back, like fight fire with fire, don't be too nice all the time some people take advantage of that, just going strong and make yourself stand out to the crowd, if life is tough then you have to be tougher within yourself,,, I wished you well, I be your friend if ya want I text anytime, buddy I may sound nice here it's because I can understand the pain I was like that once years back but never again
Im sorry I made so many comments but I just hope that all goes well for you. And I hope none of my comments have offended you. I think your reallt cool and yiur super duper relatable with me.
What strikes me is why people from the US are so obsessed with someone who wears handkerchiefs and is willing to diminish that person to dust. I'm from Europe and you can hardly ever find someone here wearing a handkerchief around one's neck, even if you come across one, strangers don't give a fuck what he/she is wearing.
If you’re bringing this gloom and doom personality with you…well you will continue to not make a single friend. It’s a harsh reality. I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone who radiates this woe is me attitude. We all struggle and have difficult lives as well. Start with going to the gym. It will boost your confidence and depression.
How to overcome these issues 🥺 I'm 23 and always feel lonely all the time whenever and wherever and I don't have any friends at all irl so miserable right, my friends around me are toxic that's what I'm automatically avoid from them
Honestly man, I feel you and I love your videos. Some small tips (though I understand it's hard to get out of vicious cycles). 1. Try and not compare yourself to others. Own yourself and just have your own style. Fuck other people. 2. Get physically in shape, try running, or walking a lot, or lifting some weights. 3. Get some new clothes, or a new haircut, something different that'll stick out. 4. MUSIC.
I'm in the exact same boat as you. 29, Uber driver. Except instead of guitar my hobby is my motorcycle. And it does attract some women, increase my confidence when approaching them. But my plan for now is to fix it is to find a decent career first and quit doing Uber so I can start my 30s off with a good start. Don't focus on getting a girlfriend or friends for now. When you have a good source of income you'll have enough time for those. I'm learning to code at the moment so I can get a job as a software developer. Maybe try giving coding a shot. It takes dedication but you won't have to drive around all day for those low ball offers Uber gives you just to make your car payment and bills on time.
Man, i know this video is old and you may not read that but, i really like the face mask it kind of adds to your personality. it may sound stupid but i dont know how to explain it better. keep up the work champ!
I spent my entire life chasing the social norm. Yes there was a lot of good times, there was also a lot of pain. I’m 50 now and I’m doing things my way. No friends no girlfriend no stress no disappointments, no drama. I chase peace now and I only get that being alone. Maybe this is meant to be your life’s path?
I dont see anything here thats unfixable thats for sure, he's a likeable fella, i personally think he does the most damage to himself emotionally, i see a man who doesnt know his own worth, doesnt see the positive sides of himself at all, well my friend i gotta say through my own experiences, positive vibes and a bit of that " i dont give a shit what anyone thinks" attitude, could certainly go a long way. Sometimes it pays just to let go of everything a bit, stop caring what others may be thinking or saying about you behind your back because none of it matters, caring about what others thinks is just more weight to carry around on those shoulders, let it go and i promise you'll immediately feel better. Also doesnt matter what anyone looks like man when it comes to getting a good women, they will see the good in you when you get rid of all that extra baggage you carry around ( bad vibes ) your a decent looking guy with potential to have some charm up his sleeve, i could visualize a confident family man within ya, just gotta find a way to bring it out. Sorry for the rant, to end it im just gonna say i personally think you should try to work on your own mental fortitude, try to understand yourself a bit more and maybe set some short term goals to help bring that self confidence up, try walk through this world while not giving a fuck what anyone thinks, just be you and be happy. Everyone will see it and be drawn to your positivity. Thats how this works. Good luck with everything there friend!
I'm 31 and I'm in a similar situation as you. I have no friends. Nearly every day I feel lonely. There have been a few women in my life, but nothing has lasted long. I just couldn't handle myself. I was constantly putting myself down. Although I was clearly signaled that they were interested in me, I couldn't believe it inside. I didn't find myself attractive. Not lovable. Why would they want to sleep with me? Or want a relationship with me? What do I have to offer? I'm a social phobe. I can't assert myself. There are better men than me. There is nothing I regret more than never taking my chances on a relationship with these great women. Where would I be now if I hadn't been such an idiot back then? Maybe I would be in a happy relationship and have a circle of friends? Could be. But maybe I wouldn't have such a good job as I have today. Or maybe I would have been run over by a bus. Who knows. Sometimes these thoughts torment me. I'm already 31, where have my 20s gone? Wasted on video games and weed. But these thoughts are useless, they are not productive. So I try to avoid them. You say you don't know how to break out of this circle. I don't know for sure either, but in the meantime I am following a few approaches that help me. Last year I understood that if I don't change something fundamentally, it won't get better. So I decided to change something. I never wanted to believe it, but exercise is actually as important and helpful as some people tell you it is. It makes me feel better and after a few weeks it started to be super fun to work out to the max. Such a good feeling. I've lost 55 pounds, my health has improved massively. I've gotten into nutrition, meditation, self-care and it has significantly enhanced my life. I am still not much less socially anxious because of it. I haven't made a single new friend yet either. Instead, I broke off contact with my last remaining friend a week ago. Now I have no one left. The friendship was not all bad, we had a lot of fun and he listened to me when I was feeling bad. But on the other hand, he constantly crossed my boundaries. I always avoided conflicts and put my needs behind. But that's over now and it feels damn good to not having anyone deal with me like that anymore. I think I know by now why I never got significantly further all these years. First of all, we need to stop putting ourselves down all the time. How are we supposed to develop if we constantly remind ourselves of all the things we don't have, all the things we can't do, and all the things we will never be? It is not easy to get rid of these thought patterns, but it can be done. Whenever I have bad thoughts about myself, I subject these thoughts to a reality check. I am insecure? No, I am not always insecure - there are also situations when I am confident. My humor is strange, people don't like it? No, I am not humorless - there are many situations in which I am very humorous and there were enough people who appreciated me exactly for that. I am a failure? No, I'm not a failure - considering the conditions I started with, I've accomplished a hell of a lot. Let's see how someone with severe social phobia and depression can get as far as I have. Furthermore, we must put ourselves in social situations and we must do it with high frequency. From now on, I'll go to the gym several times a week, I'll go to a support group for social anxiety once a week, I'll take courses at the adult education center that interest me, e.g. on astronomy, and I'll soon arrange via app to engage in social activities like table tennis with random strangers who are looking for comrades-in-arms. Maybe it will be too much for me, then I'll do less. But first of all, I'm going to challenge myself permanently. I have already started with some of those things. Soon I'll move to a new city and start a new job, then the rest will follow. I don't know if that's the right way to go. I just know that it shouldn't go on like it is now and that my life and I are worth fighting as hard as I can for it. Well then, enough writing. I don't know if my thoughts are correct and lead to overcoming this social phobia and this depression. But I thought I'd share them with you as you share your thoughts with us. You are so much braver than me by posting these videos. I've seen you even perform in karaoke bars. Fuck I couldn't do that. You are a good one, you are looking good, you have a lot of potential and I wish you all the best.
Also SHOUTOUT TO HOUSTON. I live right outside of Houston. I highkey hate driving into Houston though. And I agree. Driving in Downtown Houston will give anyone anxiety. Ive never driven myself there but ive driven with others there and it always puts me a bit on edge. One day though ima drive there just to say I did it.
It breaks my heart seeing good dudes like you going thru this. I'm going thru the same thing but it's by choice. For some reason I just don't get lonely. I basically have thinking that if nobody wants to talk to me then fuck em. It sounds sad but it works for me. I'm actually surprised that I've had girlfriends in the past. Actually it's a miracle. I don't know what your beliefs are but when the right girl crosses your path, you'll know brother.
Loneliness is very, very tough at times but one does get used to it. You have to find things to do. In terms of being romantic with women - if you're attractive then they will be enthusiastic, if you're not then probably best to find other stuff to combat the depression and anxiety. Romantic relationships with women IS the magic wand that will cure most problems but, if you're like me and physically ugly, then it just won't happen so pointless banging on about it I suppose. Good luck.
you need 2 kinds of love: the love family and friends can provide and love from a significant other. unfortunately females are the gatekeepers of this. im sorta in the same situation but i learned not to care about that. i accepted my fate. work on yourself both physically and mentally and get your revenge
I hope you will find a way out of this situation, i just want to say that I have already found it and it’s definitely possible!! Even if it seems it’s not, I’m sure it’s just yes, it’s just possible
Bro I feel you 100%. I been hanging a lot more with my friend on the weekends most with us screwing around with his car. I been also tryna talk to girls hear and there. I knew I felt lonely so I said fuck it. Lemme fix that. Also dude your not ugly. Your good looking. Ive seen some seriously ugly alien looking dudes and your nowhere near that. Id say and I think another person mentioned this in the comment is maybe try changing your hairstyle/haircut. Bcs legit dude in my opinion I think your very good looking. Start working out as well and dude youll be set. I have a coworker/friend who used to havw really long hair and he looked rather shaggy. But hes a cool dude. Later on he decided to cut his hair and everyone was shocked cause we were so used to seeing him with long hair. But at the same time it turned his look around so much becuase he was already a good looking guy. His hair just blocked his face. In your case I suppose its the way its made up. But yeah man trust me I know you'll someday have a girlfriend.
this is not an issue that affects you alone or others that have struggles with learning social skills. loneliness is something that plagues most men, even if you have a small group of good friends and nice relationship. the loneliness can still be unbearable, you have to go out of your way to surround yourself with as many quality people who care about you as you can.
Man. Please look into how you can improve your diet. I’m lonely too man but it’s okay. I also try to approach girls in public but I fail every single time. I can’t even muster the courage to speak to them. But every day I go out and try. Ive done it before plenty of times but recently I just can’t muster the courage and to even say something to them. But I won’t give up. Neither should you
You should try excersizing and getting in good shape. You might meet people at the gym and it will help you socialize, maybe hire a trainer too if you don't know what you're doing. It'll help you feel better and look better and have much better confidence. Worth a shot my friend.
I dont think you look as bad as you may think. You just need to find your own style and take care of yourself (gym etc) and even if none of us will be a 10/10, you'll be looking better then now.
I definitely understand the loneliness as a man. I've been in one long term relationship that ended and have dated people a little bit here and there over the years. If you want to know the truth it is this and I hope you see my post: As a man, at the end if the day, no one cares about our struggles. We have to be beasts NO MATTER WHAT. Not everything about the red pill is 100% correct, but I suggest you watch some red pill creators for men. It will help you understand why women do and act how they fo and honestly, it's a weight off your shoulders once you understand that. As a guy, I know at the end of the day, I need to fight and never give up regardless.
Leave your "music career" in the past bro.. Leave the video games in the past... Leave that Uber job and find something where you can socialize Join a Gym and get in shape Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start focusing on making the best version of yourself. If you keep doing the same thing over and over again you'll find yourself in the same position 10 years from now. Women can sense insecurities, just put yourself in their shoes. would you date someone who all he does is play video games, doesn't have their sht together and is always complaining about everything or someone who is atleast trying to better themselves? This may seem harsh. But I was just like you til I left the video games in the past, joined a gym, got in shape which boosted my confidence and overall lifestyle and now I have a lot of options to pick from, even had women ask for my number in some occasions.
I know people who have recently moved away from Texas because it's so ridiculously expensive, if you're this unhappy maybe move someplace else just start looking for places with a low cost of living. I mean, it doesn't sound like there's anything for you in Texas, so just start looking and make the move. I thought you said you were an Uber driver, if that's your main profession you can do that anywhere.
Im the opposite. I ALWAYS had a girlfriend and trust me ive been single now for 8 years and have discovered myself. Sure its nice to have someone around but its even nicer being able to get things done. Most women wanna drag you down on their level and make you feel you cant have a life. Its no way to live and it doesn't make you happy. It ends up being A LOT of work.
You gotta fight to have good mental health. Work out. Eat clean. Drink plenty of water. Get QUALITY sleep, get your circadian Rythms in order. Quit eating sugar and processed food. Put some effort into your appearance because when you look good you feel good. Do these things and I GARUNTEE you will feel better Mentally, physically and emotionally. Might even cure your depression. Life is going to try to fold you every time. It’s your responsibility to become unfoldable.
Hey bro you have a Snapchat or something? I’d like to talk to you about some of this stuff. I’m not sure if your doing better now or not but I’d like to be a friend/acquaintance of yours. I know a little bit about how you feel. I can really really relate to your social anxiety. I was able to work my way out of it but I used to go to highschool every day with tremendous anxiety. I wanted so bad to be normal and not have that anxious feeling. My anxiety would get so bad that I’d throw up multiple times a week. Sometimes more than once a day. Id throw up walking into school, throw up before a presentation, throw up before an event with friends and other people. That was a bit of a rant but I just wanna say I can relate to you there and I’m just offering to be another friend of yours. That level of anxiety is pretty much completely behind me now and I’m now comfortable with myself. I hope your doing better now bro.
You don't even look as bad you think you are. If you take the time to take care of yourself (going to the gym, getting a haircut that suits you, fixing your facial hair) I believe you could be a good looking man. Don't be too harsh on yourself man. Learn to love yourself, and people will be more drawn towards you. Hope this helps man.
Dude 100%. This guy is not ugly in an irredeemable sense.
Besides everything you mentioned, I think a large problem for him is that he has no reference point of what being "cool" is. There's many different versions of this depending on one's own personality, stage in life, etc. etc. etc. But his mannerisms/gestures, the way he carries himself, and even the way his voice sounds comes off as very autistic/geeky. He just needs a nudge in the right direction and I feel things could be very different for him.
facts I know some ugly mofos and this dude is not bad at all!
His problem is way more serious than his physical aspects. There is no guarantee you can make friends no matter how good you look. That would be superficial. That would be a plus but It all comes down to being able to connect to people, make them feel comfortable, and being comfortable around them. And that can happen if you socialize with people regularly.
@@prasmitdevkota4251 sure, those are valid points. But you know what helps when socializing with people? Confidence. And you can get a massive boost in confidence when you know you're in your best shape, when you know that you're well taken care of.
I used to have social anxiety, I dread the feeling of being in a room full of people. But when I started taking care of how I look, I can't stress enough how much of a confidence boost it gave me, that I found myself initiating conversations, when back then, I used to not even speak for hours unless I was spoken to.
Is it superficial? You could make that argument. Is it useful? It damn well is.
If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here. I know it sounds weird, but it never hurts to help someone out and let them know they are not alone. This world needs more humanity than ever.
Same bro, there are people that will help if you need it and carry a lot of valuable information and advice that could help you a lot.
you missed the point of the video completely. you bozo. why would he want to talk to some random indian online. he wants a female bro
Dont tell me what to do ma boi and dont make me stand up and come over there.
I fck you up son.
Watching your video of u talk about how you are lonely, eased my feeling of loneliness
U help people unintentionally
With these videos
Dont forget that
Facts
Can't play guitar, can't drive a car cause I don't know how. Man, you do both and this is an advantage for you. Own it! Loneliness is everywhere these days, with all social media, we are more alone than ever. Another good thing you did is creating a community here on UA-cam. Something big again. I'm not good at that either. So yeah, here are 3 big advantages that you have. Keep the channel going and don't quit. You are on a great journey ahead 🙂
xd loser
My heart goes out to all the physically unattractive people in the world. It was never your fault that you were born like that, and no one should really feel unloved. It’s a sad world.
I agree with your point but this guy is not ugly
Working out, a decent wardrobe and grooming can make any man look decent
It’s not about looks🤦♂️u need to feel confident in being yourself (not changing just to please someone) regardless of the outcome. That makes u successful in everything (not only with women).
And the reason you are feeling lonely is probably because you have a passion deep down that you are not working towards.
Think about it bro. What’s to say you’re not gonna feel lonely even in a relationship, or if you have 100 flings. It’s mindset bro. Improve that
That's so true.
@@adzinsnsek3en887think there are people who are overly critical of themselves to the point that its off putting. At the same time, I think saying, "just be confident!" is bs and false hope. Yes it is harder for less attractive men to get dates and women.
A good way to forget your problems is to HELP others. It feels so good to read to the elderly, or deliver roadside flowers to a friend's door with a kind note! Being a friend is how you get a friend.
when i felt down i usually always either go to the gym or go for some short runs just to clear my head from what’s going on. I don’t know if you already do this but if you don’t i 100% recommend doing it. Also if you already have 2 best friends, talk to them.. if they’re good enough to be considered your best friends they should be able to talk to you. You don’t have to burden them with this information you can just let your emotions out to them and if for some reason you really can’t do this then go to a therapist, maybe they can help you with your situation. Also it’s always important to keep a good mindset, if you want change make it come to you, keep trying and don’t give up. Nothing will ever change if you’re to scared to do it, I had this problem a while back too but i kept reminding myself that there will be no medicals in life and the only thing i could do was by doing it myself. Work on yourself before you think of a girlfriend and having a lady friend doesn’t always mean you should tell them you like them after a small span of time, try to keep your relationship with them and build it and make it healthy, this goes for any friendship to male, female, or whatever. Best wishes man, keep you head up and keep on trying to work on yourself and make yourself a better man. You got this.
You are in my prayers brother.
May the Lord Bless&Keep you.
My NO weapon formed by the enemy effect you. May He give you Peace .
This video helps me by making me realize that I'm not alone dealing with these types of issues. Thank u sir
I actually have deep empathy for you sir, especially because I'm pretty much the same age with the same issues, albeit my financial situation is slightly better. I recently this year started going to the gym, relapsed but started back again. I know one problem we both have is we self deprecate ourselves constantly, we CONSTANTLY put ourselves down and it amplifies our anxiety and decreases our confidence by exponents. We have no to little self love, this is why for the last 8 years (im 26) all I have done is work/college, smoke weed, play video games. No bars, no clubs, very little socialization aside from what was forced in college, never pursued women , what's the point when I can just get high and jack off, less drama is what I thought. Hanging over my stoned stupor these last 8 years was a slowly growing dark cloud of loneliness, the type of loneliness that changes somebody in a very negative way. I have no good advice to give you since like I said, I'm in pretty much the same position you are spare the finances. But I did want to let you know that you are not alone, and I genuinely wish you a life full of happiness and joy. Have a great day.
How’s life Joe a month later?
@@TheSantos173 been going to the gym hard, my body is looking better. Still have a lot to work on though.
@@TheAverageJoe2014 keep going
@@cameronwaelchli6319 been going 5-6 days a week since august. I’m down 20 pounds since the beginning of the year currently at 210 and I’m 6 foot tall. My lifts are getting better and better. I still have a long way to go though regarding my social life, and I need to get out there and date lmao 🤣
@@TheSantos173hi santos, please don’t call people by their first name. Do you like when I call you santos? Huh? Yeh thought so…
Man I can see you with a nice haircut nice clothes a nice smile and going out and conquering life and getting everything you deserve from the guitar to the lady bro I have faith in you don’t sabotage yourself bro and if it ain’t logical stay out your feelings bro it’s no money there💯💪🏾
I hope you find your purpose bro. keep grinding in making videos, i just found you today and i'll keep supporting you. i'm alone, been alone my entire life really and in a very dark place myself. hope you get allright man
@Street Tool It's okay man, it can happen, I know a few people who are in this situation also, but how old are you, and what would you say is the reason..
Talking on the phone to family and friends helps me a lot
What if you have no friends or family to talk with?
Even without social anxiety it's hard, everyone is busy trying to figure out life themselves, you can't really blame them.
I genuinely mean it when I say, go to the gym and work out, cut your hair, wear basic clothes (white shirt and jeans), eat healthy, take care of yourself. Get out of your comfort zone. Being depressed or anxious shouldn’t be an excuse for not doing better. It’s an explanation, but respectfully you use it as a reason for not evolving. Nothing good comes easy. So don’t expect it too. Work for it. Coming from a person that was depressed. It’s no wonder that you don’t feel great while not taking care of yourself that much. When you continue doing those things you’ll see how much better you’ll feel.
This is coming from a caring place, not from hate. Take care dude
Don't feel embarrassed for making these videos.. this is your safe space and we're all here for you.
thanks for being so honest man! hope you are getting better my friend....
Thanks for sharing bro. Seriously. I feel some of the same feelings and it helps knowing I'm not alone.
Build that courage up to do things you may be uncomfortable with. I got the best outcomes doing things when I had an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach the butterflies. I promise if you start doing this in your everyday life u will get the outcomes you want
You didn't waste anyone's time. You are a human that's hurting. Please stop thinking you're a burden on anyone too
Dude you're awesome - I hope you do well! It's nice to see a real person with their own problems and emotions, not another perfect blogger image
I think I kinda understand what could be your issue because I was going through a similar situation in the past and basically its mostly about the mindset. Many people are occupying their minds with what they cant have or what is the norm that they should have otherwise they are useless and how lonely it is and in the end we are creating in our minds the hell hole where we struggle. I mean remember your accomplishments in life you can play a musical instrument you have overcome homelessness and got back on your feet even though you are struggling with solitude you still have good friends which is not everyone could tell because most liked people tend to not form a poweful friendships since they treat people as disposable and you dont do it. Keep your head high focus on earning enough money to fullfil your dream of getting the guitar back and doing what you like and then the right people will flock to you instantly. It may sound harsh but if you beat yourself down and the anxiety and nerves and deppression oozes from you people tend to stay away. “We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more in imagination than in reality.” Seneca
Please stop saying that telling that girl you liked her was a mistake. It wasn't.
Bro I’ve also felt alone and still do at times. What I did was I went to the gym, dressed better, got tattoos because I really wanted them, got my ear pierced, grew my facial hair and hair, started going to church on sundays, met awesome people outside of work, build my social skills, got out my comfort zone. I’m still developing myself. This helped me bro and I’m sure you can find something that will work for you. Fuck people that bring you down. keep pushing bro
This is from the heart, the number one thing you can do is stop playing the victim. No one wants to be around that. Stay strong.
I’m a female in a similar situation thanks for sharing!
Damn man. Don't give up! Make sure you have at least one thing that keeps you going. Same happened to me when my friends started to get girlfriends or moving away.
Don't let people convince you that your problems matter less because your aren't disabled, have food in the table and other bs.
He might be disabled but not diagnosed. Happens way more then you think
Thank you for the channel. I like your channel. Take care. Happy new year. We all go through trials and times that changes every day. Wish you the best
Projecting comment you made is correct, they are smart and intuitive these women, they pick up on your mental state and you're nerves and conscious give away a negative vibe and so they run ..
Your not alone bro my whole life has been hell cuz of my bipolar disorder. Never give up on being positive and love yourself. Your a cool dude just live and relax as much as you can. Also being alone has so much benefits if your think about it! You save hella money for example. But bro, your a good guy and there’s nothing wrong with you. Always fight the negative energy. It will take long to cope but I promise you will find happiness somehow!
You got this man - I’d recommend one thing to do, is to always focus doing something in your time beyond your job, that allows you to “level up” your character. Whether it’s in physical strength, intellectual strength, or your community service. At any given point in time, make sure you are upping your strengths in these categories.
But honestly, starting right off- Hit the gym man, increase your protein intake/decrease junk food and carbs- it will pay off dividends in your future health, your self esteem, and level up your physical strength. It will give something immediately to level up in, and early gym strength progress is often quick, and it will pay dividends to your motivation and drive. It will reflect in your external appearance to others too. I know it sounds cliche, but this is indeed one of the main things that really do help level up your character in real life.
Don't be lonely. A new friend here. God bless you. 🙏❤️ You're a talented man. Keep it up.
It actually hurts and pissis me off so much that people keep calling you ugly 😔 I see your shattered heart and its probably the most genuine I've ever seen anyone be and share in a long time. These videos you make really make me appreciate what I do have going well in my life. I feel pretty similarly to you where its a chore to wake up and goto work then coming home and crying for xyz reasons. I can't express how much these videos are helping me overcome my own problems. I really want to see this man build up confidence and overcome his doubts and get that dream girl in the end. It hurts me so much that someone so kind can be treated like utter shit and be tossed around in today's society as if he's a failure. People have no sympathy for you and its truly sickening that your scared to even read your comments on these videos in the fear that they'll bring you down. I truly wish I could be there for your support and help you get by life ☹️
i am 30 years old guy people call me ugly too
The things you talk about are common to the human experience. Some books came to mind while I was watching this video. Books that helped me and continues to do so. Might be worth checking out. “Meditations” by Marcus Aurelius. “War of Art” by Steven Pressfield. And “Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor Frankl. Everyone has so sort out their own way of thinking, but there are some ideas and some levers hidden in great books written by people that did some fantastic sorting themselves.
I've been suffering from depression and anxiety all my life ( i'm a bit older than you) and the only times i feel normal is when i'm on fluoxetine and anxiolytics. Of course one should work on one's mindset but with these it's definately easier and they make you feel more confident. Good luck to you Man
Keep your head high ! U will get though this ! Things WILL get better !
i dont think ur problem is u being ugly, poor, loser or any thing only problem is loneliness for all men like us
Men suffer from loneliness more 10 times than women
I’m a woman and I definitely suffer from loneliness. I think his problem is probably like mine social anxiety/social awkwardness/lack of confidence which would turn people off
@@jomr4249 guaranteed if you went out there you could have anyone you want and guaranteed you’re not ugly like me. Society doesn’t hate you. You’re a woman get out there and have fun but for me I will just rock here alone because I have nothing to offer. Nobody wants to have kids with an ugly pos like me.
@@jomr4249 lacking confidence when you are a woman is completely different story. I saw so many times a girl with low confidence and she always had a partner...
Definitely work on fixing yourself first before taking on another person. The relationship you have with other people will only be as good and healthy as the relationship you have with yourself. 🙏God Bless 🙏 I pray you heal soon 🙏
I could honestly get how you feel. Feeling lost and things never making sense. And feeling no one understands I get it.
It’s funny you touched on the prediction thing. Bc I see my self doing that when I’m at my worse even lately when I’m at my best. It’s just how can you be so sure. Life is complicated. I hate when I do that too because you never will know the outcome of life or what is ahead. For me I’m just trying to remain in the present and first work out the issues you got going on and then make push. I was the similar spot a year ago.
You inspire me homie.
Feeling lonely is not about what you have, it about what you appreciate!
As someone who don`t pay bills, rent, having a big house and having athletic and healthy body and lifestyle I can say that I still feel depressed and lonely. The days that I feel most happy I do not care about my problems and focus on my growth and hobbies
@Big Bangy България!
@@teodortodorov1662lol you probably live with your parents
@@LilXancheX Maybe if I had making a lots of money I would leave them.
While I don't have the exact same issues, I'm in a similar boat as you on many facets.
I'm planning to relocate to another state and start over because of my problems. But it was just good watching this to see I'm not alone.
I'll definitely keep watching if you continously post
Dude, I'm literally a survivor from depression, I used to take pills like implicane, risperidona, olazin, and many other antidepressants.
I'm still taking olazin to sleep because I suffer from insomnia (I'm getting better), and take magnesium pills for Fobia and social anxiety.
And all the struggle I had was for a Purpose: helping others like me from the past.
My advice to you is this, eat healthy, take long walks and take morning sun to charge you up.
Read books or listen audiobooks like steven covey's, conferences like Jhon Maxwell, Bryan Tracy, etc...
This is an stage that every high value men needs to pass through.
I have been emasculated by woman, guys at school threw me stones, and many more things that caused me to reclude myself from my childhood to almost 25 (I'm 26).
I hope you find my advice, and I will copy and paste this until you see it, I wish the better for you.
don’t subscribe to this toxic “high value man” bullshit. it’s the stuff of incels who blame society for their inability to get women.
I see you have a lot of potential brother but you are allowing your feelings to get a hold of you, master your emotions, it is everything trust me.
Thanks for sharing 👍🙏💯
Bro I would rather you reach out to me than to have to live your life filled with anxiety, you got to stop hendering yourself from being great bro you deserve to live a good life as well you just have to believe it bro❤
you dont need anyone else bro. you need to be content within yourself and if you dont, you have the power to fix it. i strongly recommend going to the gym bc a strong body is a strong mind is sooooo true
Social anxiety isn’t rare it’s just some people can go with the flow and hide it better and then there are people who mannerisms and conversations that gives it away. Just like how some people make you uncomfortable or awkward, others can feel the same but you. Let things happen naturally and do the things you want. Meet people who accepts you, don’t lie to yourself about how people treat you and how you treat them. I have Social Pragmatic disorder and learned this the hard way. A lot of my behavior weren’t good towards my friends and I need to be more mindful of others and my some friends definitely treated me like shit but I was to desperate to not be lonely to see it at the time. I had a problem with infatuation before and it’s bad. Girls don’t like desperate people. They laugh at them with their friends and pity them. It just happens. You have too much self pity for yourself. You’re a dude with a good heart let yourself be you and fix things about yourself. You’re always allowed to evolve and change. Never think this is the end for you, you’re 28 and still have a lot of time left.
Psychologist do work. It helps to share your inner thoughts and fears with someone that doesn't judge you. Whatever you're feeling, although it may not seem this way, millions of others have also felt. Don't give up, you're a young man with a lot of time for your life to change for the better.
Overthinking and the feeling of fear of the other person might betray is the main reason it is harder for us to make friends when we get old. But remember, you cannot love anything that you think negative about. Thats impossible. So you should see world from more of a positive light and start to have a positive and loving feeling towards everyone. I always effortlessly made friends and that happened because I always searched positive in the people and found a reason to like them.
I feel ya man. I also got social anxiety n I try to overcome it but it’s difficult when you’re too damn shy n quiet like me. I try not to peak my head into finding a relationship with a girl but honestly I don’t even care. With all of that being said, hang in there just try to improve on yourself even tho it’s hard n frustrating.
We in the same boat my brotha
try getting prescribed.
@@kiavaxxaskew
Prescription girlfriend?
I stand in a very strange camp facially. I either look very handsome to some people or very ugly to others. It's created a polarizing effect and a lot of people just end up not wanting me around completely.
I never get texted back from people, never get asked to hang out, always third wheeling. It's just gotten completely old.
The dreary, hazy feeling of isolation over time is like slowly breathing in carbon monoxide. You don't realize how detrimental it is until it is too late.
Same spot for me im 58, no girlfriend, lonely life
Everyone has different opinions on what is good looking or ugly. Confidence is the first step, and after that everything falls into place.
man you really should read or listen the book No more mr nice guy.Listen and then pratice.This book changed how i react to things in my life and made me acountable for the shit i did too.It should help you with the situations and loneliness too.
me too i was destroyed by anxiety and panic attacks and i am somewhat healed from that.Just give the time work on yourself,do some exercise, eat clean food and improve your sleep and rest periods.I know its like a broken record advice but it saved my life!
hope youre doing better!
"Loneliness" comes from within just like happiness. Loneliness is discontentment with the self. Relationships are overrated. The discontentment only goes away for the excitement of someone new to share your life with until the relationship becomes complacent and the excitement exits. Then the discontentment returns. When youre ok with you is when someone else will notice and take interest.
What you need is a mentor, not someone to just "talk too" online. I person that takes you on, train, socialize, have time to meet you. They are out there. but are rare. One thing you can do is socialize, being nice, talking to a lot of people and be be semi open. Its very hard to leave your situation alone, its easier if you surround you with people that enable you. You get nowhere if you put the same solution to the same problem over and over. One thing you are doing very good is working and putting that money into that car. Some day it will paid off.
I really want to be your friend I'm serious I do, I feel so sorry for you and all the pain you gone through, that last video in your car actually made me tear but please listen to me please don't give up keep moving forward no matter what, mate, stand up and be tough, and don't let words and trash keep letting you down, stand up on your feet and fight back, like fight fire with fire, don't be too nice all the time some people take advantage of that, just going strong and make yourself stand out to the crowd, if life is tough then you have to be tougher within yourself,,, I wished you well, I be your friend if ya want I text anytime, buddy I may sound nice here it's because I can understand the pain I was like that once years back but never again
Your nice
Yeah I respect people that needs it I be friends to anyone that is kind and caring
@@chrislabedzski9076 much respect for you
Im sorry I made so many comments but I just hope that all goes well for you. And I hope none of my comments have offended you. I think your reallt cool and yiur super duper relatable with me.
What strikes me is why people from the US are so obsessed with someone who wears handkerchiefs and is willing to diminish that person to dust. I'm from Europe and you can hardly ever find someone here wearing a handkerchief around one's neck, even if you come across one, strangers don't give a fuck what he/she is wearing.
If you’re bringing this gloom and doom personality with you…well you will continue to not make a single friend. It’s a harsh reality. I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone who radiates this woe is me attitude. We all struggle and have difficult lives as well.
Start with going to the gym. It will boost your confidence and depression.
bluepilled coper
the fact that hes ac not bad looking, but everything else that is in his own control, he chooses to not care about or improve
I'm mostly always depressed and lonely
How to overcome these issues 🥺 I'm 23 and always feel lonely all the time whenever and wherever and I don't have any friends at all irl so miserable right, my friends around me are toxic that's what I'm automatically avoid from them
Honestly man, I feel you and I love your videos. Some small tips (though I understand it's hard to get out of vicious cycles).
1. Try and not compare yourself to others. Own yourself and just have your own style. Fuck other people.
2. Get physically in shape, try running, or walking a lot, or lifting some weights.
3. Get some new clothes, or a new haircut, something different that'll stick out.
4. MUSIC.
I'm in the exact same boat as you. 29, Uber driver. Except instead of guitar my hobby is my motorcycle. And it does attract some women, increase my confidence when approaching them. But my plan for now is to fix it is to find a decent career first and quit doing Uber so I can start my 30s off with a good start. Don't focus on getting a girlfriend or friends for now. When you have a good source of income you'll have enough time for those. I'm learning to code at the moment so I can get a job as a software developer. Maybe try giving coding a shot. It takes dedication but you won't have to drive around all day for those low ball offers Uber gives you just to make your car payment and bills on time.
Man, i know this video is old and you may not read that but, i really like the face mask it kind of adds to your personality. it may sound stupid but i dont know how to explain it better. keep up the work champ!
your not alone. we got your back just reach out
I spent my entire life chasing the social norm. Yes there was a lot of good times, there was also a lot of pain. I’m 50 now and I’m doing things my way. No friends no girlfriend no stress no disappointments, no drama. I chase peace now and I only get that being alone. Maybe this is meant to be your life’s path?
believe me your times were much better than today's men.
I dont see anything here thats unfixable thats for sure, he's a likeable fella, i personally think he does the most damage to himself emotionally, i see a man who doesnt know his own worth, doesnt see the positive sides of himself at all, well my friend i gotta say through my own experiences, positive vibes and a bit of that " i dont give a shit what anyone thinks" attitude, could certainly go a long way. Sometimes it pays just to let go of everything a bit, stop caring what others may be thinking or saying about you behind your back because none of it matters, caring about what others thinks is just more weight to carry around on those shoulders, let it go and i promise you'll immediately feel better. Also doesnt matter what anyone looks like man when it comes to getting a good women, they will see the good in you when you get rid of all that extra baggage you carry around ( bad vibes ) your a decent looking guy with potential to have some charm up his sleeve, i could visualize a confident family man within ya, just gotta find a way to bring it out. Sorry for the rant, to end it im just gonna say i personally think you should try to work on your own mental fortitude, try to understand yourself a bit more and maybe set some short term goals to help bring that self confidence up, try walk through this world while not giving a fuck what anyone thinks, just be you and be happy. Everyone will see it and be drawn to your positivity. Thats how this works. Good luck with everything there friend!
Bro I'm from Houston too! If you ever need someone to free your mind to, let me know brother! I know exactly how you feel man
People are freaking a-holes!
Keep fighting!
I'm 31 and I'm in a similar situation as you. I have no friends. Nearly every day I feel lonely. There have been a few women in my life, but nothing has lasted long. I just couldn't handle myself. I was constantly putting myself down. Although I was clearly signaled that they were interested in me, I couldn't believe it inside. I didn't find myself attractive. Not lovable. Why would they want to sleep with me? Or want a relationship with me? What do I have to offer? I'm a social phobe. I can't assert myself. There are better men than me. There is nothing I regret more than never taking my chances on a relationship with these great women. Where would I be now if I hadn't been such an idiot back then? Maybe I would be in a happy relationship and have a circle of friends? Could be. But maybe I wouldn't have such a good job as I have today. Or maybe I would have been run over by a bus. Who knows. Sometimes these thoughts torment me. I'm already 31, where have my 20s gone? Wasted on video games and weed. But these thoughts are useless, they are not productive. So I try to avoid them.
You say you don't know how to break out of this circle. I don't know for sure either, but in the meantime I am following a few approaches that help me. Last year I understood that if I don't change something fundamentally, it won't get better. So I decided to change something. I never wanted to believe it, but exercise is actually as important and helpful as some people tell you it is. It makes me feel better and after a few weeks it started to be super fun to work out to the max. Such a good feeling. I've lost 55 pounds, my health has improved massively. I've gotten into nutrition, meditation, self-care and it has significantly enhanced my life.
I am still not much less socially anxious because of it. I haven't made a single new friend yet either. Instead, I broke off contact with my last remaining friend a week ago. Now I have no one left. The friendship was not all bad, we had a lot of fun and he listened to me when I was feeling bad. But on the other hand, he constantly crossed my boundaries. I always avoided conflicts and put my needs behind. But that's over now and it feels damn good to not having anyone deal with me like that anymore.
I think I know by now why I never got significantly further all these years. First of all, we need to stop putting ourselves down all the time. How are we supposed to develop if we constantly remind ourselves of all the things we don't have, all the things we can't do, and all the things we will never be? It is not easy to get rid of these thought patterns, but it can be done. Whenever I have bad thoughts about myself, I subject these thoughts to a reality check. I am insecure? No, I am not always insecure - there are also situations when I am confident. My humor is strange, people don't like it? No, I am not humorless - there are many situations in which I am very humorous and there were enough people who appreciated me exactly for that. I am a failure? No, I'm not a failure - considering the conditions I started with, I've accomplished a hell of a lot. Let's see how someone with severe social phobia and depression can get as far as I have.
Furthermore, we must put ourselves in social situations and we must do it with high frequency. From now on, I'll go to the gym several times a week, I'll go to a support group for social anxiety once a week, I'll take courses at the adult education center that interest me, e.g. on astronomy, and I'll soon arrange via app to engage in social activities like table tennis with random strangers who are looking for comrades-in-arms. Maybe it will be too much for me, then I'll do less. But first of all, I'm going to challenge myself permanently. I have already started with some of those things. Soon I'll move to a new city and start a new job, then the rest will follow.
I don't know if that's the right way to go. I just know that it shouldn't go on like it is now and that my life and I are worth fighting as hard as I can for it.
Well then, enough writing. I don't know if my thoughts are correct and lead to overcoming this social phobia and this depression. But I thought I'd share them with you as you share your thoughts with us. You are so much braver than me by posting these videos. I've seen you even perform in karaoke bars. Fuck I couldn't do that. You are a good one, you are looking good, you have a lot of potential and I wish you all the best.
At least you have someone to talk to and at least you have two friends I'm a wanderer no family or friends just me and my pet dog
How’s your relationship with your family?
Also SHOUTOUT TO HOUSTON. I live right outside of Houston. I highkey hate driving into Houston though. And I agree. Driving in Downtown Houston will give anyone anxiety. Ive never driven myself there but ive driven with others there and it always puts me a bit on edge. One day though ima drive there just to say I did it.
Edge.
It breaks my heart seeing good dudes like you going thru this. I'm going thru the same thing but it's by choice. For some reason I just don't get lonely. I basically have thinking that if nobody wants to talk to me then fuck em. It sounds sad but it works for me. I'm actually surprised that I've had girlfriends in the past. Actually it's a miracle. I don't know what your beliefs are but when the right girl crosses your path, you'll know brother.
Loneliness is very, very tough at times but one does get used to it. You have to find things to do. In terms of being romantic with women - if you're attractive then they will be enthusiastic, if you're not then probably best to find other stuff to combat the depression and anxiety. Romantic relationships with women IS the magic wand that will cure most problems but, if you're like me and physically ugly, then it just won't happen so pointless banging on about it I suppose.
Good luck.
you need 2 kinds of love: the love family and friends can provide and love from a significant other. unfortunately females are the gatekeepers of this. im sorta in the same situation but i learned not to care about that. i accepted my fate. work on yourself both physically and mentally and get your revenge
I hope you will find a way out of this situation, i just want to say that I have already found it and it’s definitely possible!! Even if it seems it’s not, I’m sure it’s just yes, it’s just possible
With all honestly, I think you have already made an improvement by trying and learning how to mange your social anxiety and depression.
Bro I feel you 100%. I been hanging a lot more with my friend on the weekends most with us screwing around with his car. I been also tryna talk to girls hear and there. I knew I felt lonely so I said fuck it. Lemme fix that. Also dude your not ugly. Your good looking. Ive seen some seriously ugly alien looking dudes and your nowhere near that. Id say and I think another person mentioned this in the comment is maybe try changing your hairstyle/haircut. Bcs legit dude in my opinion I think your very good looking. Start working out as well and dude youll be set. I have a coworker/friend who used to havw really long hair and he looked rather shaggy. But hes a cool dude. Later on he decided to cut his hair and everyone was shocked cause we were so used to seeing him with long hair. But at the same time it turned his look around so much becuase he was already a good looking guy. His hair just blocked his face. In your case I suppose its the way its made up. But yeah man trust me I know you'll someday have a girlfriend.
this is not an issue that affects you alone or others that have struggles with learning social skills. loneliness is something that plagues most men, even if you have a small group of good friends and nice relationship. the loneliness can still be unbearable, you have to go out of your way to surround yourself with as many quality people who care about you as you can.
Stay strong
Man. Please look into how you can improve your diet. I’m lonely too man but it’s okay. I also try to approach girls in public but I fail every single time. I can’t even muster the courage to speak to them. But every day I go out and try. Ive done it before plenty of times but recently I just can’t muster the courage and to even say something to them. But I won’t give up. Neither should you
Oh wow, that is pretty wild man. But yeah, keep at it(if you don't give up) and see what will happen later on.
You should try excersizing and getting in good shape. You might meet people at the gym and it will help you socialize, maybe hire a trainer too if you don't know what you're doing. It'll help you feel better and look better and have much better confidence. Worth a shot my friend.
Your videos really help people! Please don’t stop posting them
I dont think you look as bad as you may think. You just need to find your own style and take care of yourself (gym etc) and even if none of us will be a 10/10, you'll be looking better then now.
I definitely understand the loneliness as a man. I've been in one long term relationship that ended and have dated people a little bit here and there over the years. If you want to know the truth it is this and I hope you see my post:
As a man, at the end if the day, no one cares about our struggles. We have to be beasts NO MATTER WHAT. Not everything about the red pill is 100% correct, but I suggest you watch some red pill creators for men. It will help you understand why women do and act how they fo and honestly, it's a weight off your shoulders once you understand that. As a guy, I know at the end of the day, I need to fight and never give up regardless.
Fuck that. That red pill shit just encourages you to give up on dating like a defeated little bitch.
The "yes it is" could have been someone feeling the same way and self proyecting instead of someone trying to be mean
My boyfriend always thought the same thing when he was single..the only women that thought he was handsome was his mom and his grandma.
Loneliness is not a phase. The field of pain is where I graze serenity is far away.
Leave your "music career" in the past bro..
Leave the video games in the past...
Leave that Uber job and find something where you can socialize
Join a Gym and get in shape
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start focusing on making the best version of yourself.
If you keep doing the same thing over and over again you'll find yourself in the same position 10 years from now.
Women can sense insecurities, just put yourself in their shoes. would you date someone who all he does is play video games, doesn't have their sht together and is always complaining about everything or someone who is atleast trying to better themselves?
This may seem harsh. But I was just like you til I left the video games in the past, joined a gym, got in shape which boosted my confidence and overall lifestyle and now I have a lot of options to pick from, even had women ask for my number in some occasions.
Why not do both? Play video games for 1 or 2 hours and then socialize
I met more women working in the music biz.
you are quite charming guy, believe me
I feel lonely everyday even when I'm around people and I'm an average looking dude
I know people who have recently moved away from Texas because it's so ridiculously expensive, if you're this unhappy maybe move someplace else just start looking for places with a low cost of living.
I mean, it doesn't sound like there's anything for you in Texas, so just start looking and make the move.
I thought you said you were an Uber driver, if that's your main profession you can do that anywhere.
Im the opposite. I ALWAYS had a girlfriend and trust me ive been single now for 8 years and have discovered myself. Sure its nice to have someone around but its even nicer being able to get things done. Most women wanna drag you down on their level and make you feel you cant have a life. Its no way to live and it doesn't make you happy. It ends up being A LOT of work.
You'll learn to enjoy it
You gotta fight to have good mental health. Work out. Eat clean. Drink plenty of water. Get QUALITY sleep, get your circadian Rythms in order. Quit eating sugar and processed food. Put some effort into your appearance because when you look good you feel good. Do these things and I GARUNTEE you will feel better Mentally, physically and emotionally. Might even cure your depression. Life is going to try to fold you every time. It’s your responsibility to become unfoldable.
Facts.
Hey bro you have a Snapchat or something? I’d like to talk to you about some of this stuff. I’m not sure if your doing better now or not but I’d like to be a friend/acquaintance of yours. I know a little bit about how you feel. I can really really relate to your social anxiety. I was able to work my way out of it but I used to go to highschool every day with tremendous anxiety. I wanted so bad to be normal and not have that anxious feeling. My anxiety would get so bad that I’d throw up multiple times a week. Sometimes more than once a day. Id throw up walking into school, throw up before a presentation, throw up before an event with friends and other people. That was a bit of a rant but I just wanna say I can relate to you there and I’m just offering to be another friend of yours. That level of anxiety is pretty much completely behind me now and I’m now comfortable with myself. I hope your doing better now bro.