For anyone that is looking at getting married, I have prepared an extensive 9hr Pre-Marriage Course where I cover all aspects regarding your journey to getting married. We conduct these courses live every few months - www.belalassaad.com.au/pre-marriage-course
assalamualaikum, sheikh, I am a 26 year old man who was matched with a girl whose guardian did not allow any man to take her out, and I was introduced to that girl, to be honest, the feeling when I first met I didn't feel like it or you could say it was normal, then the girl told her guardian that she liked me, I was asking Allah to marry me, long story short I thought this was the path that Allah had given me, maybe this was the best path from Allah, and finally I agreed to get engaged, but after we got engaged my heart I seemed to say no to the girl, remembering that from the first time I met her, I was normal to that girl, now I'm confused about whether I should continue with the condition of my heart that says no, or what. I really need an answer right now, because the woman's guardian asked for certainty, hopefully the answer from the sheikh is an answer from Allah too.
Assalyam aleikum, brother Belal. Many thanks for enlightening me with your lessons. I am from Uzbekistan. I am still single although I am 33. Alhamdulillah now I can afford to get married. I had a conversation and meeting with one girl from another city in my country. I went there to get to know her with good intentions because my friends suggested to meet her. I found out that she tries to practise Islam, tries to pray, but not regularly, she doesn't wear hejab, but the most frustrating thing was that she draws, paints people's pictures as her hobby. It has reached to the point that people have begun to order their pictures for money and she paints people's pictures for them with a pleasure. She doesn't want to quit painting due to her interest. But I am scared of this because painting living creatures prohibited in Islam. Shall I still go on to marry her knowing that she won't stop painting? But something inside me hates that she paints
❤I'm sure happy with the stregth partof the wwhy a bigging you can get the best of the stregth part of the stregth part of the. by the way off Allah rabbi jallah whallah ❤ bicous his best one love you right I'm sure good will happy with it Alhamdulillah rabbilallamiehne bicous right now I'm a good one for my own life ❤❤❤
Everyone who reads this, please make Dua for me. There is a woman that I find very special and exceptional, to the point that my fear is that I won't be good enough for her. Make Dua that I will be everything she wants and needs in a husband and more InshaAllah
Lecture notes 🖊️ 🖊️ Steps for getting to know someone for marriage. 🖊️ Marriage is compulsory, when you have the means... All sorts of means. And the fear that you're ganna fall for Haram. Get marry if you're in such condition. Time transperecy, time, talking, tolerance the five important T's of a marriage 🖊️ Marriage is Recommended, when you do have means all sorts of but you have control your temptations. 🖊️ Marriage is Neutral, when you're finances and temptations are balancrd, not too much 🖊️ Marriage is Disliked, when one doesn't have enough finances, but temptations are so low that they won't be able to satisfy a female 🖊️ Marriage is Forbidden, unable to provide for a family and they are ganna victimize the female. So forbidden. How to search for a spouse, the limits of searching for a spouse 🖊️ So the one who is serious for marriage, and he know he would talk in Islamic boundaries and within limits with respect, he can talk to the other person that he wants to marry. But the necessary things only. 🖊️ Don't approach marriage if you're not ready , just because you're thinking thr other person ganna go away and you just cling on to it knowing that you're ganna marry like 7 years after ... Don't approach for such marriage.... If you know you can't marry this person, don't play with him or her. Seeing the potential spouse, what to see in her or him 🖊️ Are you allowed to see her without hijab? 🖊️ You can see only hands and face says majority. But based on evidence prophet saaw said to jabir ... See of her what would entice you to marry her and the scholars say that you can see of her with her Wali permission ( father or brother ) what they'd allow, bit of hairs,a bit of arms, legs or neck or what a father or brother or uncle can see . 🖊️ Take your time in meeting and knowing them... Take your time when you're knowing her or him. But with respect Bi IznIAllah. 🖊️ Ask and research for things that you are looking for in a marriage before you marry, that you want in your spouse, manners! Or being a good friend or beauty or wealth etc. What makes a good husband or wife in your perspective.... Ask and research for it... make a list of things you're looking for inshallah. 🖊️ Look for what you really want, and look for a person who already have what you want in spouse. What is already there, what is already established. Because you might do things for other's and if something happens and they leave that thing because they say we did that only for you Ways you can find someone....... 🖊️ In a respectable manner, within limits, within the line of islam that you know her or him quite well Matters to keep in mind to find about each other 13 topics of discussion to talk about. Visit the one you wanna marey in his/her home... Talk to her in a supervised environment. Like do talk before so that you two become comfortable , the likes and dislikes maybe. Talk about yourself first Talk about things... Other things with her, weather etc maybe..... What you can ask or talk with your spouse before Marriage , think about them and then decide. 1 Whats marriage life to you... 2 What qualities would you like to see in a spouse. 3 Talk about each other family and culture. Talk about how things goes in each other families. Talk about culture how things goes on in one's family. 4 Living arrangements and family dynamics. Islam does not recommend that a husband would force her wife to live with her family. She would have a home of herself. 5 How you spend your free times... Hobbies... You workout or do you read or you do what. 6 financial arrangements. Managing finances. Agree on finances... No matter your money is mine or your and my money is ours.... Just be agree on these arrangements. Her money is her's, but his money, a part of his earnings or wealth is her's money not all money. 7 Talk about children, talk about numbers, and how to raise them how to educate them and naming them. Who would name the child... So talk about them 8 future Ambitions, your carrier, my carrier, 9 Health issues, that you might have. Islam have made this thing haram. Don't hide it from him or her. Tell someone else to tell them but do tell them 10 The past. If a sin in your past can show in future, talk about it. Like drugs. Or some addictions. Talk about it. With respect of course. Anything that can creeo from the past, talk about it. 11 How would you want a weeding, details of weeding. Talk about details so that it doesn't make a fuss in that critical time. JazakAllah khair
Inshallah! Allah had a precious Muslim man show up in the US. What a gift. Take your own car and don’t go to rooms. That was my father’s advice but he’s not Muslim.
I love it when my Muslim brothers sisters tell stories and happenings in the comment section. It just feels like a global community sharing and chit chatting together. Makes me so happy😁😁
Questions to ask? 1. How you view marriage life? 2. Qualities you will like to see in a spouse? 3. Each others family dynamics; how you get along with your family, culture, living arrangements 4. How you spend your free time; what are your hubbies, what's cheating when it comes to social media 5. Financial arrangements; combined or separated resources, lending money 6. Social life; introverts, extroverts 7. Children: decisions on educating them, naming them, raising them 8. Future ambition and goals 9. Health issues 10. The past 11. Criminal records 12. How would you want a wedding?
Shayteen live in the human body!!! Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174 Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies! May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us).... Satan Said, "I will Surely Mislead them All," and so God Said, "I will Surely Fill Hell with you, O Iblees, and those of them that Follow you All Together"So Indeed Satan is an Enemy to you, so Take him as an Enemy, he Only Invites you to be with him in the Blaze of Hellfire 43:62, Qur'an [So] never let Satan avert you. Indeed, he is a clear enemy to you - 36:62, Qur'an [For] he had already led astray much of creation from among you, so did you not use reason? 15:39 - 40, Qur'an [For Iblees] said, "My Lord, because You have made me err, I will surely make [disobedience] attractive to them on earth, and I will mislead them all, except Your chosen servants among them." 38:84 - 85, Qur'an [So God] said, "The truth [is My oath], and the truth I say - [that] I will surely fill Hell with you and those of them that follow you all together.".... Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174 Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies! May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us)
الحمد لله الذي بنعمته تتم الصا لحات I have always refrained from falling into haram relationships because I truly believe that each one of us has already someone Allah has chosen for us. We just have to be patient and hold onto our faith that the person Allah has chosen for us will find us in His destined time. In my prayers, I always ask Allah to preserve my future husband like how He is preserving me for him. May Allah guide us and grant us sabaar while waiting. May we all be married to someone who would help us build our eeman stronger. Ameen.
@@hannahmhmmd aameen May Allah preserve my future husband just as Allah has preserved me for Him. May I meet a loving, caring, generous, very righteous, and good akhlaaq man. May Allah give us good Naseeb. Aameen
One of the best lectures I’ve heard, masha Allah, I love the way he talks, such a soft spoken May Allah swt grant him the highest rank of jannah ameen, truly a very clear message. May Allah swt be pleased with him on the day of judgment ameen
Assalamu alaikum just to give some hope insha'Allah. I searched for 10 years, couldnt find a husband. In the lockdown my mum gave me a profile of someone and after meeting 3 times we decided to get married alhamdulillah. We spoke on the phone in between. We are UK born, professionals but we kept family in the loop which is how I knew he was serious. Of course alhamdulillah he was God fearing and respectful towards me. Theres nothing shameful about involving family early on.
Alhamdulillah that’s great news for you. May Allah bless you. I’m in a predicament as well, looking for long but still no opening. Family are not well connected socially so it’s more hard and going through the social media route is a bit scary tbh.
Brothers, I hope this channel Admin makes some Islamic videos about the harms of porn. Moslem youths are being plagued by this disease, but for many non-Moslem white men, it is their pride that keep them pure and good. Whoever I talk to about Islam, they listen with eagerness and say they will take a course in Islam, while Moslems I advise lash out, and even speak negatively about tenets of Islam, until I was afraid for the future of this Ummah, and I felt like screaming and crying. Every one of us will have to die, today or tomorrow, and imagine, if you have to lose Iman and faith in Allah because of these filthy sins, and because you were addicted to watching these disgusting things, then we must ask why were we even born. You and I will rot in the awaiting grave and those dirty bodied porn stars who you watched will also die and decompose in the shallow graves and will be eaten by insects and worms, and yet, Moslems are constantly searching online for more filthy images and videos. Who do you think Allah will prefer to have next to Him in paradise? Moslems who watch porn and think about sexual relations all day, or non-Moslem men who are chaste and have a clean heart? Never think Allah has a dearth of people to worship Him, and if your heart is filthy, then Allah will replace you with the non-Muslim youths who have a pure heart, because they do not find the filthy women in porn movies to be attractive or worthy of their time. In whose heart do you think Allah will decide to preserve the Koran? Who do you think Allah will give the gift of the Koran, in their hearts or our dirty eyes and filthy minded souls which have become cheap by constantly watching disgusting bodies of human worshiping? While Moslem are watching and worshipping filthy probate parts of sinful men and women, don’t you think Allah might choose to expel us from the glorious folds of Islam?
I think such advice should be given in every school, irrespective of race or religion, I wish I had the benefit of such advice when I was young (many years ago) unfortunately I am a product of the 60’s, but Allah makes us strong with every life experience 🙏
Mashallah he has such a wide knowledge in so many aspects and his ability to apply Islam in a pure practical way on our day to day life is impressive. Inshallah we will have more such blessed professors.thank you so much , you answered so many of my questions and im sure many of us find many answers in this lecture mashallah without even have to ask our questions.
@ It's their own journey, lol. We're not entitled to knowing that. They could also be young. Please don't say these types of things as it's discouraging.
Shayteen live in the human body!!! Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174 Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies! May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us).... Satan Said, "I will Surely Mislead them All," and so God Said, "I will Surely Fill Hell with you, O Iblees, and those of them that Follow you All Together"So Indeed Satan is an Enemy to you, so Take him as an Enemy, he Only Invites you to be with him in the Blaze of Hellfire 43:62, Qur'an [So] never let Satan avert you. Indeed, he is a clear enemy to you - 36:62, Qur'an [For] he had already led astray much of creation from among you, so did you not use reason? 15:39 - 40, Qur'an [For Iblees] said, "My Lord, because You have made me err, I will surely make [disobedience] attractive to them on earth, and I will mislead them all, except Your chosen servants among them." 38:84 - 85, Qur'an [So God] said, "The truth [is My oath], and the truth I say - [that] I will surely fill Hell with you and those of them that follow you all together.".... Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174 Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies! May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us)
@@hellfire...burns. Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.” Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174 Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim عَنْ أَنَسٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِنَّ الشَّيْطَانَ يَجْرِي مِنْ الْإِنْسَانِ مَجْرَى الدَّمِ
My Brother sent me this and i listened it completely. My Brother is now in Qabr😭. May Allah make his qabr vast and bless him with Jannah🤲. I am excited to Prophet (SAW)'s wedding and my brother's wedding in Jannah❤. May Allah make it true. Aameen yaa rabbal aalameen🤲.
Those questions and decisions are really really important, I knew islam value your thoughts, feelings and opinions ... I'm fully agreed with mufti May Allah bless us all
Jazakumullah khairun Sheikh. There are also those that convert to Islam for the sake of marriage and not for the pleasure of ALLAH. I know of a family that married their daughter to a "revert from hindu" soon after they married the husband stopped practicing and became influenced by his family again. They raised their children upon a philosophy and some mix of Islam from wife's extended family. However this man would refuse for the children to do anything like madressa or fast etc. Many years later they divorced, Alhamdulillah. The daughter chose to practice Islam fully, Alhamdulillah however she is a single Mother trying to protect her child from the clutches of her father who dots over the grandson who is the only grandchild. Please keep them in your duas , may Allah facilitate their hijrah and make her son amongst the righteous Aameen
Thank sheikh. I started to talk with someone for marriage. I wrote all this questions in my note. And I will ask all of them . May Allah take care of you.
This is one of THE best lectures on marriage on youtube... I'm surprised this imam only has 1k followers. His advice is on nouman ali khan or mufti menk level. Looking forward to more content!
@@PoesieIslamiquePlease listen to what he said about mixing again. He is a school teacher and counselor as well so he knows what happens on the ground / in reality hence he mentions genders mixing already exists....he is addressing people living in the west who attend the schools etc. He clearly said we can't be naive about what happens and that the ideal would be how it used to be during the time of Nabi SAW.
@@PoesieIslamique it would be helpful and a show of your level of knowledge and wisdom to clarify which ‘weird’ points about mixing I stated so we can all learn inshllah.
welp some of us guys dont wanna sell ourselfs on social media like some game ofcourse that makes the options alot smaller but doesnt matter really cause its all Allahs plans for us@@fridawsbamba1641
We’ll it’s sad that women are asking for so much when the inflation rates are so high and zina is so cheap when Aisha ra ate dates and black water for 3 months
@@zk321 When you Muslim men become exactly like Rasoolallah, then we Muslim women will become like Aisha. No other way around. Otherwise, your suggestion to drink black water is ridiculous! I wonder if it's even saheeh! And you're comparing two completely different times. Your logic would make us go back to ride donkeys instead of driving the cars. Allah forbid and protect us from the extremes and extremists of all kinds, both ascetics and hedonists! Asceticism is not an excuse for laziness.
@@RR-wk9zi As a Muslimah, I support this message but not to the point of being ridiculously cheep. As you said, treating yourself from your savings with trips to the neighboring cities or countries should be a norm. I don't crave for luxurious travels but neither do I want to live a boring life like a prisoner in one town my entire life and eventually only visit Saudi on my way to hajj. I don't want a husband who's a couch potato because I certainly am not a lazy woman unlike many sisters who just want to live privileged princess life of putting makeup on, shopping, travelling, and self-obsessed social media boasting and self-promoting even when married.
Sister Aminah, define 'full provision', please. I hope your clarification will be realistic. On the other hand, I know extremes where they really don't provide basic necessities, yet look for a 2nd wife. Those are disgusting weasels.
Me watching this right now because he said he'll come to our home in 2 days. 💀 Idk what he saw in me. But i did secretly like him. Although I just hoped he talked to my dad for setting that date. Listening to this though, maybe we should be easy on him hahahaa. Please Make dua that everything goes for the best. 👀🥺
Please make dua for me, I haven’t had any kind of luck in this field. I’m really stressed out not being able to find anyone, and my hopes have gone all down. I have a family who really don’t care for me to be happy, and they have shamed me for being rejected. I have a mother and sister who finds it laughable I am not married yet, I also get cursed by them in this aspect “you’ll never find anyone” “no one will deal with you” and so on …. And so I have no one to turn to expect Allah swt, and feeling super alone in this world. So please make dua for me I find a good righteous husband who will take care of me. Inshallah ameen.
JazzakAllah Khaïr Sheikh for your advise to muslims to choose muslimah as their spouse. One of reason why sisters are 35+ without finding a husband is because, brothers tend to choose non muslim women as spouses, specially those brothers who became successful in their careers. They don't want to be seen with a woman wearing hijab. Subhana Allah, I pray Allah SWT that our sons choose muslim women for marriage for their own sake. Wassalam Alaikoum.
When he was talking about men that are a bit more feminete or women that are a bitt more musculine, he isn't talking about those that support and are a part of the qawmu lut gang.
Yes because it’s very lonely out here Allah made us to be in pairs at minimum Swear I’m dead serious I’ll need 1-2weeks to get mentally physically ready
This is the only man who ever addressed my struggle. I’m a 28 young man looking to get married for like 2 years now but am afraid to not be able to satisfy my spouse. I’ve been thinking about this for years. I’m really worried and anxious. Sometimes i just don’t sleep at night. I don’t know what to do. The pressure of my family is unbearable as time goes… Anyone relating to this struggle ? Any help here. How can I contact you ? Pls
im 27 years old i never had a girlfriend before i never kissed a girl and im a virgin. I never smoked cigarettes shisha or drunk alcohol. And im proud but thats why future wife has to be a virgin too. BUT if i wasnt a virgin my self i shouldnt und couldnt expect a virgin wife too.
Alhamdulillah!! thank you for this amazing khutba. It was so helpful. You had such wonderful insights for marriage. I wanted to ask you if you can make a video about children at a young age coming asking where did they come from and what's the process. Ofcourse we sugarcoat things in the beginning but as they grow up, they know the real truth. But my question is if we don't lie to our kids, how much truth do we really reveal at their very young age so they don't become influenced wrongly and act on it in desparation? Thank you!
22:00 this is actually a good advise. Like you have to give space and keep improving yourself. He/She will see your change will follow too. Might take long but it works!
I think it’s a good idea to start with, after establishing some contact to lay out the bad habits to see if you can tolerate them. If you can’t then move on… because the things you can agree on can and will be there with many people
There is a girl I am getting to know. Her sister told me all about her and she also told her about me. Now, we are spending time talking on the phone. She is very shy and innocent. May Allah make it easy for us if we are destined to be together in marriage. Please pray for us brothers and sisters
Helpful lecture, I took notes. I think Q1 is very important and one should also mention gender-roles since these can be a big problem especially in the west. Men usually looking for traditional gender roles, but some sisters want to have their own freedom when it comes to working, decision taking and splitting household chores etc. But also sister should specifically ask brothers if they are expecting the women to go to work and pay half of the bills. Also how about getting married legally in the west? Is it necessary. Should one avoid it?
@@RR-wk9zi Maybe it's different in your culture but in my environment most girls also expect some sort of ring (usually diamond) or other type of jewelery on top of mahr + the groom is also expected to pay for the brides wedding dress + shoes. And let's not forget he already has to save up for the actual wedding, flat, furniture etc. If the guy is lucky and can find a job in his parents vicinity and doesn't have to pay rent or his dad helps him out financially, he can save it up with 2-3 years of work. Otherwise we shouldn't expect brothers to work until 25 to get married.
Wow some of these comments make me scared of getting married. The state of women in the west is very very very bad.. if women talk about 'at least having 20,000 on their Bank Account, having enough Qualification to work etc.', just in case something goes wrong is extreme stupidity. It's the same as a man getting to know his 2nd wife already 'just in case the first one fails'.. can't take any risks, right 🤡
it's funny how girls nowadays say "being a mum is a full time job" and using it as an excuse why the man should help her out in the household while they have all kinds of machines, food is ready, bread is ready, even the babys food is ready, there is pampers, breast pumps etc. My grandma had no washing machine, no dish washer, even no fridge when she was younger. There was no shop other than weekly bazaar. She had to bake her own bread, the vegetables and eggs had to be picked up from the garden, the chicken fed, the milk milked. And she still managed to grow 5 children. So I guess being a mum used to be 3 full time jobs.
I am facing the same issue that I didn't know what I want because I was 17 at my engagement time and he was 27 so he know what he want. Now I am facing the issues
@@zaibnwazit’s good to have someone older and realize they need patience. The couple has to have good communication. A man in early 20s has not usually developed his patience and consideration for the wife’s feelings.
Thank you so much Ya sheikh. Right now am really on this move, that's why i had to learn more about the decisions I take because marriage is a serious thing so long as you in it no going out unnecessarily 😢
As a muslim vrigin of 23 years and counting, I want to get married in the near future, however I either want a virgin preferably or a woman who's only been with one other person via marriage. However, I don't even know where to begin to start asking about a potential wife's past without trying to expose her past. But I just don't want to be with someone who used to go out with others, even if that was their past. That's good for them, but I just can't do that myself
A lot of ppl actually don’t understand what is and isn’t creepy unfortunately and need actual direction. And even with direction still don’t understand!
I feel better watching this video. Btw I have problem with my mr.p because of diabetes. I diagnosed diabetes since I was teen and Im 29 now. Its hard to explain when your family and your society asking about marriage cause only your age mature enought for that.
Thank you very much. In my opinion,since Prophet(SAW) said that if two people of opposite sex who are not family are in an enclosed place, the third person will be shaytan. Hence, my opinion is that such people should see each other where others are present. For instance,in a mosque etc.
the important questions are : are you a hadith rejector? do you believe in feminism? are you a sufi? etc... all the shoubouhat, for me these things are the most important i don't care how you spend your freetime if you are a hadiht rejector
In the beginning you brushed off the ideal way of marriage. Can you explain what that is? Ideally you’re not supposed to talk and just marry based on what your parents say? Is there a special reward if you do? Can you elaborate?
AsAlaykum, in Islam it is preferred to speak to your prospective spouse in the presence and permission of her Wali- who is her father in the first degree, if this can be done. Otherwise, there are other halal means. It does not mean that the parents must decide whom you must marry, this is in fact against Islamic principles. Thank you for your question.
I think there has been a misunderstanding. It‘s technically not allowed for a man and a woman to speak privately in a secluded area without a third person present, who is a „Mahram“. A mahram is any Person related to the woman in a way that they can’t marry her, e.g. her brother, father, uncle, granddad… This is to protect both parties from crossing any boundaries, bc ofc as long as a person is present certain physical intimate and other haram, e.g. verbal, boundaries can be withheld or in case it happens, the Mahram can intervene. This protects the woman especially, since some people use these also for assault etc. So it would be ideal to ask the Dad or any other male mahram from the girls family if you’re interested in marriage, then they relay the message to the daughter, if she’s interested and would be willing to meet. If the daughter/sister whatever agrees to meet, than they can sit together/go on dates etc with a mahram present. Theres no boundaries, you can go to the restaurant or do any other activity and get to know the person as long as the mahram is always present. And there is no limit of time how you should get to know someone. Like if its a month or a year, or even a few years - as long a no boundaries are crossed, and the mahram is present, you can meet as many times as you like and decide if this is the right fit for you or not. Being forced into a marriage is strictly forbidden, in fact, the marriage isn’t seen as valid and the parents/ppl who forced will have to answer for that. And allah knows best
@@belal.assaad Ameen, me and you both. Baraka allahu feek for answering, and may Allah swt make you successful in your Dawah and your Teaching, and may it become your reason for entering Firdaus Al Alaa. Since you did answer, may I take this opportunity to get your counsel on a personal matter? If you have no objections, I would like to elaborate on my situation regarding a potential spouse (husband) I am currently getting to know and would love get your counsel/expert opinion on that. No hard feelings if you’d rather not :) again, May Allah swt reward you highly, and wa salam alaikum wa rahmatu allahi wa barakatuh
Im a non-muslim person and i love youre content and yes girls dont ever share anything to a guy if he ask you!!! Dont ever do that because you never know what is their intentions... 🥺take care of yourself.
Aslamualeikum sheikh. Very heart touching lecture Marshallah it was. I am engaged with a guy for 2 years and still we didn't discuss these things. When I start he said we will see after marriage and if I start forcely these topics he didn't make any interest in it. For 2 years he is just discussing me the odd sexual things and just funny jokes and these types of things. I several times makes him understand that we have to discuss these and agree on both our choices. I show strictness ni my behavior to make him to understand these then he discuss some times some things and I describe him that I want these type of things. He is changing a little bit but he said that I am changing for you. I don't know what should I do for now. He is good in religion and character mashallah but don't understand these real facts. I am 19 and he is 29. I am just making Dua for me and him.
Alllah forgive me if I'm wrong but I truly believe this doesn't seem good. He is not so good in religion if he makes sexual jokes with a woman he is not married to and his character doesn't seem so good if you as the woman have to "force" these topics on him! It was a good idea to ask the sheikh, seek help wherever you find it even the internet but please do not let this be the only thing you do. I advise you find someone in person you can confide in with the details (a family member, sister at the masjid, elder in the community, anyone with good will & integrity) and ask again what they think. But in the end, truly, it only matters what you think. I will make dua that whatever decision you make to be the right one.
41:25 ... 😅 Mr Belal you are hilarious... This topic should have been brought up again- like the topic about " Those who desire Paradise " but 2.0 version of it . Listening to this at work- so with that : thank you for the company. insha Allah until the next time.
For anyone that is looking at getting married, I have prepared an extensive 9hr Pre-Marriage Course where I cover all aspects regarding your journey to getting married. We conduct these courses live every few months - www.belalassaad.com.au/pre-marriage-course
assalamualaikum, sheikh, I am a 26 year old man who was matched with a girl whose guardian did not allow any man to take her out, and I was introduced to that girl, to be honest, the feeling when I first met I didn't feel like it or you could say it was normal, then the girl told her guardian that she liked me, I was asking Allah to marry me, long story short I thought this was the path that Allah had given me, maybe this was the best path from Allah, and finally I agreed to get engaged, but after we got engaged my heart I seemed to say no to the girl, remembering that from the first time I met her, I was normal to that girl, now I'm confused about whether I should continue with the condition of my heart that says no, or what. I really need an answer right now, because the woman's guardian asked for certainty, hopefully the answer from the sheikh is an answer from Allah too.
Assalyam aleikum, brother Belal. Many thanks for enlightening me with your lessons. I am from Uzbekistan. I am still single although I am 33. Alhamdulillah now I can afford to get married. I had a conversation and meeting with one girl from another city in my country. I went there to get to know her with good intentions because my friends suggested to meet her. I found out that she tries to practise Islam, tries to pray, but not regularly, she doesn't wear hejab, but the most frustrating thing was that she draws, paints people's pictures as her hobby. It has reached to the point that people have begun to order their pictures for money and she paints people's pictures for them with a pleasure. She doesn't want to quit painting due to her interest. But I am scared of this because painting living creatures prohibited in Islam. Shall I still go on to marry her knowing that she won't stop painting? But something inside me hates that she paints
Ma Sha Allah
❤I'm sure happy with the stregth partof the wwhy a bigging you can get the best of the stregth part of the stregth part of the. by the way off Allah rabbi jallah whallah ❤ bicous his best one love you right I'm sure good will happy with it Alhamdulillah rabbilallamiehne bicous right now I'm a good one for my own life ❤❤❤
@@bumblebee1544
Love is unpredictable, friendship is built
Everyone who reads this, please make Dua for me. There is a woman that I find very special and exceptional, to the point that my fear is that I won't be good enough for her. Make Dua that I will be everything she wants and needs in a husband and more InshaAllah
L0
bro, that goes for me too. I even started pray regularly. I never saw her yet.
May Allah make it easy inshallah amiin
I really hope Allah grant you brothers a healthy marriage with the ones your attached too
May ALLAH ease it
Lecture notes 🖊️
🖊️ Steps for getting to know someone for marriage.
🖊️ Marriage is compulsory, when you have the means... All sorts of means. And the fear that you're ganna fall for Haram. Get marry if you're in such condition.
Time transperecy, time, talking, tolerance the five important T's of a marriage
🖊️ Marriage is Recommended, when you do have means all sorts of but you have control your temptations.
🖊️ Marriage is Neutral, when you're finances and temptations are balancrd, not too much
🖊️ Marriage is Disliked, when one doesn't have enough finances, but temptations are so low that they won't be able to satisfy a female
🖊️ Marriage is Forbidden, unable to provide for a family and they are ganna victimize the female. So forbidden.
How to search for a spouse, the limits of searching for a spouse
🖊️ So the one who is serious for marriage, and he know he would talk in Islamic boundaries and within limits with respect, he can talk to the other person that he wants to marry. But the necessary things only.
🖊️ Don't approach marriage if you're not ready , just because you're thinking thr other person ganna go away and you just cling on to it knowing that you're ganna marry like 7 years after ... Don't approach for such marriage.... If you know you can't marry this person, don't play with him or her.
Seeing the potential spouse, what to see in her or him
🖊️ Are you allowed to see her without hijab?
🖊️ You can see only hands and face says majority. But based on evidence prophet saaw said to jabir ... See of her what would entice you to marry her and the scholars say that you can see of her with her Wali permission ( father or brother ) what they'd allow, bit of hairs,a bit of arms, legs or neck or what a father or brother or uncle can see .
🖊️ Take your time in meeting and knowing them... Take your time when you're knowing her or him. But with respect Bi IznIAllah.
🖊️ Ask and research for things that you are looking for in a marriage before you marry, that you want in your spouse, manners! Or being a good friend or beauty or wealth etc. What makes a good husband or wife in your perspective.... Ask and research for it... make a list of things you're looking for inshallah.
🖊️ Look for what you really want, and look for a person who already have what you want in spouse. What is already there, what is already established. Because you might do things for other's and if something happens and they leave that thing because they say we did that only for you
Ways you can find someone.......
🖊️ In a respectable manner, within limits, within the line of islam that you know her or him quite well
Matters to keep in mind to find about each other
13 topics of discussion to talk about.
Visit the one you wanna marey in his/her home...
Talk to her in a supervised environment. Like do talk before so that you two become comfortable , the likes and dislikes maybe.
Talk about yourself first
Talk about things... Other things with her, weather etc maybe.....
What you can ask or talk with your spouse before Marriage , think about them and then decide.
1 Whats marriage life to you...
2 What qualities would you like to see in a spouse.
3 Talk about each other family and culture. Talk about how things goes in each other families. Talk about culture how things goes on in one's family.
4 Living arrangements and family dynamics. Islam does not recommend that a husband would force her wife to live with her family. She would have a home of herself.
5 How you spend your free times... Hobbies... You workout or do you read or you do what.
6 financial arrangements. Managing finances. Agree on finances... No matter your money is mine or your and my money is ours.... Just be agree on these arrangements. Her money is her's, but his money, a part of his earnings or wealth is her's money not all money.
7 Talk about children, talk about numbers, and how to raise them how to educate them and naming them. Who would name the child... So talk about them
8 future Ambitions, your carrier, my carrier,
9 Health issues, that you might have. Islam have made this thing haram. Don't hide it from him or her. Tell someone else to tell them but do tell them
10 The past. If a sin in your past can show in future, talk about it. Like drugs. Or some addictions. Talk about it. With respect of course. Anything that can creeo from the past, talk about it.
11 How would you want a weeding, details of weeding. Talk about details so that it doesn't make a fuss in that critical time.
JazakAllah khair
Thank you so much!
@@dkurniawatid 😇
Thank you for writing. Really appreciated
@@wyhed1 remember me in your prays bhai 🏵️
Jazakallah ❤ I needed this
Pray for me May I find righteous spouse who will be best for me.
May Allah give you a good man of your choice, اللهم صل و سلم و بارك على محمد و على اله و اصحابه اجمعين
Inshallah! Allah had a precious Muslim man show up in the US. What a gift. Take your own car and don’t go to rooms. That was my father’s advice but he’s not Muslim.
Ameen 🤲🏻
May Allah grant u a pious spouse
May Allah SWT grant you a spouse whom you’re pleased with and whom Allah SWT is pleased with Allahumma Ameen
I love it when my Muslim brothers sisters tell stories and happenings in the comment section. It just feels like a global community sharing and chit chatting together. Makes me so happy😁😁
Just like a gossiping group chat
Haha..
Good 👍🏻
@@bakhtawarnawaz7791wooow,like seriously
Ikr 😊
Questions to ask?
1. How you view marriage life?
2. Qualities you will like to see in a spouse?
3. Each others family dynamics; how you get along with your family, culture, living arrangements
4. How you spend your free time; what are your hubbies, what's cheating when it comes to social media
5. Financial arrangements; combined or separated resources, lending money
6. Social life; introverts, extroverts
7. Children: decisions on educating them, naming them, raising them
8. Future ambition and goals
9. Health issues
10. The past
11. Criminal records
12. How would you want a wedding?
Weddings are from the past
Thank you 😊
@@MakaveliA.Bwhat
Shayteen live in the human body!!!
Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood
Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.”
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174
Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim
Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies!
May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us).... Satan Said, "I will Surely Mislead them All," and so God Said, "I will Surely Fill Hell with you, O Iblees, and those of them that Follow you All Together"So Indeed Satan is an Enemy to you, so Take him as an Enemy, he Only Invites you to be with him in the Blaze of Hellfire
43:62, Qur'an
[So] never let Satan avert you. Indeed, he is a clear enemy to you -
36:62, Qur'an
[For] he had already led astray much of creation from among you, so did you not use reason?
15:39 - 40, Qur'an
[For Iblees] said, "My Lord, because You have made me err, I will surely make [disobedience] attractive to them on earth, and I will mislead them all, except Your chosen servants among them."
38:84 - 85, Qur'an
[So God] said, "The truth [is My oath], and the truth I say - [that] I will surely fill Hell with you and those of them that follow you all together."....
Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood
Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.”
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174
Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim
Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies!
May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us)
@@MakaveliA.B get off your red pill nonsense boy. Are you a Muslim?
الحمد لله الذي بنعمته تتم الصا لحات
I have always refrained from falling into haram relationships because I truly believe that each one of us has already someone Allah has chosen for us. We just have to be patient and hold onto our faith that the person Allah has chosen for us will find us in His destined time.
In my prayers, I always ask Allah to preserve my future husband like how He is preserving me for him. May Allah guide us and grant us sabaar while waiting.
May we all be married to someone who would help us build our eeman stronger. Ameen.
Ameen
Ameen
Ameen yarab 🥹
@@hannahmhmmd aameen
May Allah preserve my future husband just as Allah has preserved me for Him. May I meet a loving, caring, generous, very righteous, and good akhlaaq man. May Allah give us good Naseeb.
Aameen
ameen
Marriage is act of worship- Subhan’Allah!
One of the best lectures I’ve heard, masha Allah, I love the way he talks, such a soft spoken May Allah swt grant him the highest rank of jannah ameen, truly a very clear message.
May Allah swt be pleased with him on the day of judgment ameen
Assalamu alaikum just to give some hope insha'Allah. I searched for 10 years, couldnt find a husband. In the lockdown my mum gave me a profile of someone and after meeting 3 times we decided to get married alhamdulillah. We spoke on the phone in between. We are UK born, professionals but we kept family in the loop which is how I knew he was serious. Of course alhamdulillah he was God fearing and respectful towards me. Theres nothing shameful about involving family early on.
Alhamdulillah that’s great news for you. May Allah bless you. I’m in a predicament as well, looking for long but still no opening. Family are not well connected socially so it’s more hard and going through the social media route is a bit scary tbh.
Involving family early on is what should be done
Yum ...that's so much wellness of you ....May God keeps yalll Happy
@@ihsaan4450Please why is family not helping though
I am 32, a doctor and still unmarried ..Still hopefull and Alhamdulillah for everything..
This lecture was great, MashaAllah! Please make a full course for youngsters going to get married. May Allah bless you, Ameen.
Brothers, I hope this channel Admin makes some Islamic videos about the harms of porn. Moslem youths are being plagued by this disease, but for many non-Moslem white men, it is their pride that keep them pure and good. Whoever I talk to about Islam, they listen with eagerness and say they will take a course in Islam, while Moslems I advise lash out, and even speak negatively about tenets of Islam, until I was afraid for the future of this Ummah, and I felt like screaming and crying.
Every one of us will have to die, today or tomorrow, and imagine, if you have to lose Iman and faith in Allah because of these filthy sins, and because you were addicted to watching these disgusting things, then we must ask why were we even born. You and I will rot in the awaiting grave and those dirty bodied porn stars who you watched will also die and decompose in the shallow graves and will be eaten by insects and worms, and yet, Moslems are constantly searching online for more filthy images and videos.
Who do you think Allah will prefer to have next to Him in paradise? Moslems who watch porn and think about sexual relations all day, or non-Moslem men who are chaste and have a clean heart? Never think Allah has a dearth of people to worship Him, and if your heart is filthy, then Allah will replace you with the non-Muslim youths who have a pure heart, because they do not find the filthy women in porn movies to be attractive or worthy of their time. In whose heart do you think Allah will decide to preserve the Koran?
Who do you think Allah will give the gift of the Koran, in their hearts or our dirty eyes and filthy minded souls which have become cheap by constantly watching disgusting bodies of human worshiping? While Moslem are watching and worshipping filthy probate parts of sinful men and women, don’t you think Allah might choose to expel us from the glorious folds of Islam?
Aameen yarba 🙏
AllahummaBarik
@stephaneabdullah7045 C*cc'c''v:cc:'
Not just the youngsters , but even older people need to hear this
I think such advice should be given in every school, irrespective of race or religion, I wish I had the benefit of such advice when I was young (many years ago) unfortunately I am a product of the 60’s, but Allah makes us strong with every life experience 🙏
That's trueee🙌🏽I'm in my 20s but I love watching this kind of contents
Mashallah he has such a wide knowledge in so many aspects and his ability to apply Islam in a pure practical way on our day to day life is impressive. Inshallah we will have more such blessed professors.thank you so much , you answered so many of my questions and im sure many of us find many answers in this lecture mashallah without even have to ask our questions.
ربنا هب لنا من أزواجنا و ذريتنا قرة أعيننا و إجعلنا للمتقين إماما ❤
I just started praying and I love listening to your lectures.
only 4 months ? why didn't you pray before ?
@ It's their own journey, lol. We're not entitled to knowing that. They could also be young. Please don't say these types of things as it's discouraging.
This lecture was so rich and insightful ma sha Allah. Jazakallahu khayran 🤲🏾
Shayteen live in the human body!!!
Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood
Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.”
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174
Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim
Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies!
May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us).... Satan Said, "I will Surely Mislead them All," and so God Said, "I will Surely Fill Hell with you, O Iblees, and those of them that Follow you All Together"So Indeed Satan is an Enemy to you, so Take him as an Enemy, he Only Invites you to be with him in the Blaze of Hellfire
43:62, Qur'an
[So] never let Satan avert you. Indeed, he is a clear enemy to you -
36:62, Qur'an
[For] he had already led astray much of creation from among you, so did you not use reason?
15:39 - 40, Qur'an
[For Iblees] said, "My Lord, because You have made me err, I will surely make [disobedience] attractive to them on earth, and I will mislead them all, except Your chosen servants among them."
38:84 - 85, Qur'an
[So God] said, "The truth [is My oath], and the truth I say - [that] I will surely fill Hell with you and those of them that follow you all together."....
Hadith on Satan: Devil runs through people like blood
Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.”
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174
Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim
Shaytaan lives inside humans! All humans have shaytaan living inside their bodies!
May Allah protect us from the accursed shaytaan and guide us to the right path ameen (WE MUST SAY! please say this because the shaytaan cant harm us)
@@hellfire...burns.
Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Satan flows through the human being like the flowing of blood.”
Source: Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2174
Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Muslim
عَنْ أَنَسٍ قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِنَّ الشَّيْطَانَ يَجْرِي مِنْ الْإِنْسَانِ مَجْرَى الدَّمِ
My Brother sent me this and i listened it completely. My Brother is now in Qabr😭. May Allah make his qabr vast and bless him with Jannah🤲. I am excited to Prophet (SAW)'s wedding and my brother's wedding in Jannah❤. May Allah make it true. Aameen yaa rabbal aalameen🤲.
This man is so blessed with knowledge, wisdom, understanding and insight. So grateful for this talk 🙏 alhamdulilah
Those questions and decisions are really really important, I knew islam value your thoughts, feelings and opinions ... I'm fully agreed with mufti
May Allah bless us all
Jazakumullah khairun Sheikh. There are also those that convert to Islam for the sake of marriage and not for the pleasure of ALLAH.
I know of a family that married their daughter to a "revert from hindu" soon after they married the husband stopped practicing and became influenced by his family again. They raised their children upon a philosophy and some mix of Islam from wife's extended family.
However this man would refuse for the children to do anything like madressa or fast etc.
Many years later they divorced, Alhamdulillah. The daughter chose to practice Islam fully, Alhamdulillah however she is a single Mother trying to protect her child from the clutches of her father who dots over the grandson who is the only grandchild.
Please keep them in your duas , may Allah facilitate their hijrah and make her son amongst the righteous
Aameen
That’s ridiculous, may Allah guide them to the right path.
lol, thats what happens with reverts
@@taym2720stop generalizing. fear Allah
The best lecture on marriage I've heard so far, May Allah bless you belal :), Jazakhallair this was so insightful especially as a young muslim woman.
Thank sheikh. I started to talk with someone for marriage. I wrote all this questions in my note. And I will ask all of them . May Allah take care of you.
How did it go? Hopefully well
why ?@@ahmedxo9094
Any update on how did it go
@@BeeButter😂
He got rejected unfortunately
This is one of THE best lectures on marriage on youtube...
I'm surprised this imam only has 1k followers.
His advice is on nouman ali khan or mufti menk level.
Looking forward to more content!
nouman and menk are both people not to follow.
not to mention that this guy said some weird stuff about mixity
This Sheikh can't be compared to those you mentioned. He is on another level. ALLAHUMA BARIK, Aameen.
May we all benefit from his lectures, Ameen
@@PoesieIslamiquePlease listen to what he said about mixing again. He is a school teacher and counselor as well so he knows what happens on the ground / in reality hence he mentions genders mixing already exists....he is addressing people living in the west who attend the schools etc.
He clearly said we can't be naive about what happens and that the ideal would be how it used to be during the time of Nabi SAW.
Jazak brother. May Allah make me as you assume of me and increase us all in knowledge and forgive our shortcomings, Ameen.
@@PoesieIslamique it would be helpful and a show of your level of knowledge and wisdom to clarify which ‘weird’ points about mixing I stated so we can all learn inshllah.
I like very much to listen to the sheikh! MashaAllah, is very good speaker! Many people can benefit from his lectures! 🤲💚🌹
Great lecture. however , I still feel overwhelmed by thinking about marriage. Finding a partner/ spouse is not easy now a days.
Yes true, but leave it to Allah
What's making it difficult though
welp some of us guys dont wanna sell ourselfs on social media like some game ofcourse that makes the options alot smaller but doesnt matter really cause its all Allahs plans for us@@fridawsbamba1641
the most truthful and practical questions before marriage
Interesting and a beneficial talk for today's youth. Allāhumma barik
It’s sad that a lot of brothers don’t fully provide for thier wives
We’ll it’s sad that women are asking for so much when the inflation rates are so high and zina is so cheap when Aisha ra ate dates and black water for 3 months
@@zk321 When you Muslim men become exactly like Rasoolallah, then we Muslim women will become like Aisha. No other way around.
Otherwise, your suggestion to drink black water is ridiculous! I wonder if it's even saheeh!
And you're comparing two completely different times. Your logic would make us go back to ride donkeys instead of driving the cars.
Allah forbid and protect us from the extremes and extremists of all kinds, both ascetics and hedonists! Asceticism is not an excuse for laziness.
@@Realrabbit If you're already a Muslim, first thing you need to do in order to thrive is to either marry or leave your non-Muslim haram girlfriend.
@@RR-wk9zi As a Muslimah, I support this message but not to the point of being ridiculously cheep. As you said, treating yourself from your savings with trips to the neighboring cities or countries should be a norm. I don't crave for luxurious travels but neither do I want to live a boring life like a prisoner in one town my entire life and eventually only visit Saudi on my way to hajj. I don't want a husband who's a couch potato because I certainly am not a lazy woman unlike many sisters who just want to live privileged princess life of putting makeup on, shopping, travelling, and self-obsessed social media boasting and self-promoting even when married.
Sister Aminah, define 'full provision', please.
I hope your clarification will be realistic.
On the other hand, I know extremes where they really don't provide basic necessities, yet look for a 2nd wife.
Those are disgusting weasels.
Me watching this right now because he said he'll come to our home in 2 days. 💀 Idk what he saw in me. But i did secretly like him. Although I just hoped he talked to my dad for setting that date. Listening to this though, maybe we should be easy on him hahahaa.
Please Make dua that everything goes for the best. 👀🥺
Please make dua for me, I haven’t had any kind of luck in this field. I’m really stressed out not being able to find anyone, and my hopes have gone all down. I have a family who really don’t care for me to be happy, and they have shamed me for being rejected. I have a mother and sister who finds it laughable I am not married yet, I also get cursed by them in this aspect “you’ll never find anyone” “no one will deal with you” and so on …. And so I have no one to turn to expect Allah swt, and feeling super alone in this world. So please make dua for me I find a good righteous husband who will take care of me. Inshallah ameen.
Where are you from?
May Allah grant you the righteous good husband . We can talk if you are interested . how old are you ?
@@1ksubwithonevideo265 haram brother.
This is the first time I hear this type of lesson jezakAllah
May Allah reward you and continue to spread beneficial knowledge through you. Ameen
A question I feel should be added is how do you handle conflict and disagreements
Becase some people may shut down and not be open to any solution or compromise unless they are approached in a certain way
May ﷲ swt. reward us all with good spouses. Allahuma Amin
JazzakAllah Khaïr Sheikh for your advise to muslims to choose muslimah as their spouse. One of reason why sisters are 35+ without finding a husband is because, brothers tend to choose non muslim women as spouses, specially those brothers who became successful in their careers. They don't want to be seen with a woman wearing hijab. Subhana Allah, I pray Allah SWT that our sons choose muslim women for marriage for their own sake. Wassalam Alaikoum.
I met a really nice man MashaAllah that i plan getting married to InshaAllah. Please pray for us 🥹
May Allah bless you two with a prosperous marriage Inshaalah. Please pray for all our brothers and sister that are looking too.
@@loyaperiot6268 thank you so much, may Allah grant you Jannah 🩷
Where did you guys meet
Salam alaykum from France 🔵⚪🔴 I just discovered these videos and i love listening them. May Allah reward you.
Amazing ma sha Allah. That final answer is brilliant.
This brother GETS IT MashaAllah
When he was talking about men that are a bit more feminete or women that are a bitt more musculine, he isn't talking about those that support and are a part of the qawmu lut gang.
Qawm e lut gang😂 Perfect name.
I believe not, because we can have the ideas or thoughts but not act upon them… i guess
@@MrsLeenzYes but one should increase in good deeds and make dua. Thoughts will decrease
The what gang?
Good ikhlaq , good manners are very important in all relationships.
So... anybody interested in marriage? .. I'm asking from a non-freaky perspective ofcourse
May Allah ﷻ bless you ya Bilal😅
Yes because it’s very lonely out here Allah made us to be in pairs at minimum
Swear I’m dead serious I’ll need 1-2weeks to get mentally physically ready
A lot of us are out there, don't know where u guys are looking though
i love his lectures mashaAllah Allahumma Baarik may Allah bless him and his family
7777p⁷
Ameen
Allah yarhm his son
Agreed family dynamics should be discussed
Encouraging Islam is fixing society’s problems and challenges
I noticed all your points and inshaaAllah convey it to my children, so that they will make right decision, JazakAllah
This is the only man who ever addressed my struggle. I’m a 28 young man looking to get married for like 2 years now but am afraid to not be able to satisfy my spouse. I’ve been thinking about this for years. I’m really worried and anxious. Sometimes i just don’t sleep at night. I don’t know what to do. The pressure of my family is unbearable as time goes… Anyone relating to this struggle ? Any help here.
How can I contact you ? Pls
im 27 years old i never had a girlfriend before i never kissed a girl and im a virgin. I never smoked cigarettes shisha or drunk alcohol. And im proud but thats why future wife has to be a virgin too. BUT if i wasnt a virgin my self i shouldnt und couldnt expect a virgin wife too.
I totally understand what means I have same problem 😢
this lecture is really like a light to our thoughts.... JazakAllah..
Man i wish i knew dis before allhamdulillah im happy tho but answered these questions during the marriage 😂
Thank you brother it was an eye opener for young generation, people who wants to getting married... May Allah bless you
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What a delight once again.
May Allah preserve you sheikh 💙
Waiyyakum.
Alhamdulillah!! thank you for this amazing khutba. It was so helpful. You had such wonderful insights for marriage. I wanted to ask you if you can make a video about children at a young age coming asking where did they come from and what's the process. Ofcourse we sugarcoat things in the beginning but as they grow up, they know the real truth. But my question is if we don't lie to our kids, how much truth do we really reveal at their very young age so they don't become influenced wrongly and act on it in desparation? Thank you!
22:00 this is actually a good advise. Like you have to give space and keep improving yourself. He/She will see your change will follow too. Might take long but it works!
As a revert have learned more about marriage... MashaAllah
This is advice worth more than gold.
Thank you dear skeikh and may allah bless you
I think it’s a good idea to start with, after establishing some contact to lay out the bad habits to see if you can tolerate them. If you can’t then move on… because the things you can agree on can and will be there with many people
I'm constantly amazed by the depth of insights this channel provides about Allah and Islamic teachings. Keep up the incredible work!
Excellent lecture, well researched and very practical.
Thanks alot for the briefings,am glad to be part of 3MTT
Very informative and beneficial. Jazakallahu khayran wa baarakallahu feek. 🤲
May Allah give me the right person to married to Ameen
Mashaallah allahuma barik sheikh. I needed this lecture. I wrote down all the points
If only this lecture was available before I got married 😔
There is a girl I am getting to know. Her sister told me all about her and she also told her about me. Now, we are spending time talking on the phone.
She is very shy and innocent.
May Allah make it easy for us if we are destined to be together in marriage.
Please pray for us brothers and sisters
Really enjoyable lecture, you speak in such an inviting way and display great character masha'Allah - barak Allah feek 🤲🏼
Helpful lecture, I took notes. I think Q1 is very important and one should also mention gender-roles since these can be a big problem especially in the west. Men usually looking for traditional gender roles, but some sisters want to have their own freedom when it comes to working, decision taking and splitting household chores etc.
But also sister should specifically ask brothers if they are expecting the women to go to work and pay half of the bills.
Also how about getting married legally in the west? Is it necessary. Should one avoid it?
20.000 is quite a lot for a young brother. Remember when you make the halal hard, haram becomes easy.
@@RR-wk9zi Maybe it's different in your culture but in my environment most girls also expect some sort of ring (usually diamond) or other type of jewelery on top of mahr + the groom is also expected to pay for the brides wedding dress + shoes.
And let's not forget he already has to save up for the actual wedding, flat, furniture etc.
If the guy is lucky and can find a job in his parents vicinity and doesn't have to pay rent or his dad helps him out financially, he can save it up with 2-3 years of work. Otherwise we shouldn't expect brothers to work until 25 to get married.
Wow some of these comments make me scared of getting married. The state of women in the west is very very very bad.. if women talk about 'at least having 20,000 on their Bank Account, having enough Qualification to work etc.', just in case something goes wrong is extreme stupidity. It's the same as a man getting to know his 2nd wife already 'just in case the first one fails'.. can't take any risks, right 🤡
it's funny how girls nowadays say "being a mum is a full time job" and using it as an excuse why the man should help her out in the household while they have all kinds of machines, food is ready, bread is ready, even the babys food is ready, there is pampers, breast pumps etc.
My grandma had no washing machine, no dish washer, even no fridge when she was younger. There was no shop other than weekly bazaar. She had to bake her own bread, the vegetables and eggs had to be picked up from the garden, the chicken fed, the milk milked. And she still managed to grow 5 children. So I guess being a mum used to be 3 full time jobs.
@@RR-wk9ziIs your advice backed up by scholarly evidence? You aren't a person of knowledge. Be humble and listen to scholars.
24:14 is such an accurate assessment tbh
Thanks for sharing this information it is very important for us the ummah MashaAllah 😊
I wish he went into cases of when it's recommended for women to get married or not
Good advice. I didn’t know these things because I was only 17 and my husband was 27 (he only knew what he wanted) 🇺🇸🇸🇦❤️
So you're both 10 years apart?
@@taxonomy5707 yes and it’s good to have someone older and experienced to handle virginity because I have heard a lot of sad stories from some women.
I am facing the same issue that I didn't know what I want because I was 17 at my engagement time and he was 27 so he know what he want. Now I am facing the issues
@@zaibnwazit’s good to have someone older and realize they need patience. The couple has to have good communication. A man in early 20s has not usually developed his patience and consideration for the wife’s feelings.
Someone older is good but I feel like that’s a big age gap
The best advices from I’ve ever heard about mariage ! Thank you very much.
Thank you so much Ya sheikh. Right now am really on this move, that's why i had to learn more about the decisions I take because marriage is a serious thing so long as you in it no going out unnecessarily 😢
Ya Allah, please pray for me. I'm going in to my thirties and I hope and pray for a husband to love, remind me of my Deen, and travel the world with.
Thank you for your video. I have made a note of the Five Ruling.
As a muslim vrigin of 23 years and counting, I want to get married in the near future, however I either want a virgin preferably or a woman who's only been with one other person via marriage. However, I don't even know where to begin to start asking about a potential wife's past without trying to expose her past. But I just don't want to be with someone who used to go out with others, even if that was their past. That's good for them, but I just can't do that myself
"you can ask them...in a non-freaky way" 😂
Was that code for flirty lol
A lot of ppl actually don’t understand what is and isn’t creepy unfortunately and need actual direction. And even with direction still don’t understand!
@@mlindalina1I'ma Flirt
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JazakAllah khair kaseeran for such words of wisdom
May Allah bless us all ameen
How you veiw married life qualities you will life see in a spouse
Thanks for this value sheikh may Allah reward you
Good advice my brother I always listen to you wish to meet you personally inShaAllah 🙏
I feel better watching this video. Btw I have problem with my mr.p because of diabetes. I diagnosed diabetes since I was teen and Im 29 now. Its hard to explain when your family and your society asking about marriage cause only your age mature enought for that.
Love from Pakıstan, my dearest Sheıkh.
It’s nice to see you active again ustadh. Alhamdulillah
Thanks .we need more vedio like this
The whole lecture summarized by Shk at the second last question ❤😂😂 1:14:14
Thank you very much. In my opinion,since Prophet(SAW) said that if two people of opposite sex who are not family are in an enclosed place, the third person will be shaytan. Hence, my opinion is that such people should see each other where others are present. For instance,in a mosque etc.
Ma sha Allah Shaikh Belal, great talk, jazak Allah khair!
the important questions are : are you a hadith rejector? do you believe in feminism? are you a sufi? etc... all the shoubouhat, for me these things are the most important i don't care how you spend your freetime if you are a hadiht rejector
In the beginning you brushed off the ideal way of marriage. Can you explain what that is? Ideally you’re not supposed to talk and just marry based on what your parents say? Is there a special reward if you do? Can you elaborate?
AsAlaykum, in Islam it is preferred to speak to your prospective spouse in the presence and permission of her Wali- who is her father in the first degree, if this can be done. Otherwise, there are other halal means. It does not mean that the parents must decide whom you must marry, this is in fact against Islamic principles. Thank you for your question.
I think there has been a misunderstanding. It‘s technically not allowed for a man and a woman to speak privately in a secluded area without a third person present, who is a „Mahram“. A mahram is any Person related to the woman in a way that they can’t marry her, e.g. her brother, father, uncle, granddad… This is to protect both parties from crossing any boundaries, bc ofc as long as a person is present certain physical intimate and other haram, e.g. verbal, boundaries can be withheld or in case it happens, the Mahram can intervene. This protects the woman especially, since some people use these also for assault etc. So it would be ideal to ask the Dad or any other male mahram from the girls family if you’re interested in marriage, then they relay the message to the daughter, if she’s interested and would be willing to meet. If the daughter/sister whatever agrees to meet, than they can sit together/go on dates etc with a mahram present. Theres no boundaries, you can go to the restaurant or do any other activity and get to know the person as long as the mahram is always present. And there is no limit of time how you should get to know someone. Like if its a month or a year, or even a few years - as long a no boundaries are crossed, and the mahram is present, you can meet as many times as you like and decide if this is the right fit for you or not. Being forced into a marriage is strictly forbidden, in fact, the marriage isn’t seen as valid and the parents/ppl who forced will have to answer for that. And allah knows best
@@justavoice7649 May Allah reward you and increase you in knowledge. Yes, that is a beautiful answer.
@@belal.assaad Ameen, me and you both. Baraka allahu feek for answering, and may Allah swt make you successful in your Dawah and your Teaching, and may it become your reason for entering Firdaus Al Alaa. Since you did answer, may I take this opportunity to get your counsel on a personal matter? If you have no objections, I would like to elaborate on my situation regarding a potential spouse (husband) I am currently getting to know and would love get your counsel/expert opinion on that. No hard feelings if you’d rather not :) again, May Allah swt reward you highly, and wa salam alaikum wa rahmatu allahi wa barakatuh
@@justavoice7649 Dating? Are you sure? This sounds very odd
Thank that you opened your channel🎉
May Allah reward you habeebi. I cant count the number of blessings i got from this beautiful lecture.
brother Belal I hope you could post more videos on more topics I much appreciate them
Im a non-muslim person and i love youre content and yes girls dont ever share anything to a guy if he ask you!!! Dont ever do that because you never know what is their intentions... 🥺take care of yourself.
Awww I had been waiting for this video .... TabarakaAllah sheikh Billal🤗
Everyone plzz make dua for me there is this man i find really special…plzz make dua for us to be together
Jazakallah sheikh this was soooo insightful plzzzzz do more videos like these! ❤
Aslamualeikum sheikh. Very heart touching lecture Marshallah it was. I am engaged with a guy for 2 years and still we didn't discuss these things. When I start he said we will see after marriage and if I start forcely these topics he didn't make any interest in it. For 2 years he is just discussing me the odd sexual things and just funny jokes and these types of things. I several times makes him understand that we have to discuss these and agree on both our choices. I show strictness ni my behavior to make him to understand these then he discuss some times some things and I describe him that I want these type of things. He is changing a little bit but he said that I am changing for you. I don't know what should I do for now. He is good in religion and character mashallah but don't understand these real facts. I am 19 and he is 29. I am just making Dua for me and him.
Alllah forgive me if I'm wrong but I truly believe this doesn't seem good. He is not so good in religion if he makes sexual jokes with a woman he is not married to and his character doesn't seem so good if you as the woman have to "force" these topics on him! It was a good idea to ask the sheikh, seek help wherever you find it even the internet but please do not let this be the only thing you do. I advise you find someone in person you can confide in with the details (a family member, sister at the masjid, elder in the community, anyone with good will & integrity) and ask again what they think. But in the end, truly, it only matters what you think. I will make dua that whatever decision you make to be the right one.
41:25 ... 😅 Mr Belal you are hilarious... This topic should have been brought up again- like the topic about " Those who desire Paradise " but 2.0 version of it .
Listening to this at work- so with that : thank you for the company.
insha Allah until the next time.