The thoughts wouldn't cause distress or anxiety IF you were really a psychopath. You are anxious because you believe that thought is horrible and would never do it.
As someone who's experienced this, it's a living hell! You can't live a normal life you're literally being tortured by your own brain and it's mentally crippling. I'm praying for anyone who's experiencing this. There IS hope I promise, I've completely recovered after seeking help. Love you and stay strong!!
I think you just explained my whole life. I never brought this up in therapy cause I'm scared of what she would think (that I'm a psychopath). Wow. Just wow.
Yeah. I really feel you. You don't want to explain your horrifying thoughts because you fear you will deeply disturb the other person. And even weirder still, repressing the thoughts when asked about them seems like a basic form or control.
I know exactly how you feel I'm currently go through what she is describing I want to cry because this whole time I've been going to therapy and I can't get myself to tell the therapist the nature of these thoughts for fear of being judged or a psychopath
You should certainly bring it up. You're certainly not a psycho, and gettung therapy in this area could be very liberating. You're freedom from pure o, is way more valuable than the fear of someone thinking that you may be psycho. Although im peetty sure your therapist wouldn't judge you or anything. Peace in love 🙂 PS. I started trusting and believing in Christ more and more and this has completely liberated me from pure o and fear of any kind . All love my friend
Just to be clear, Pure O is generally like, 95% of the time you are FLOODED with these thoughts and feelings. It doesn't end, except when heavily medicated or extremely busy. I still get echoes of it but when it was full blown I likely would have killed myself if I couldn't find treatment. It's horrific. Would probably rather have both of my arms chopped off than relapse.
I have pure O and it sucks. I remember back as young as 8 have intrusive thoughts. It went away for a while then came back viciously as a teen. I kept it to myself because I knew it wasn’t me, I knew something was wrong but I was too scared to voice my concerns because I thought if I talked to someone they would think I was crazy. The intrusiveness eventually subsided for about 6 years. Fast forward to pregnancy and having a child. My hormones were thrown completely out of wack and once again intrusive thoughts came back and hit me like a truck. It was almost constant. It would play on my worst fears(loved ones dying, me hurting them, suicide and leaving my child motherless). Even though I 100% know none of this would ever happen the fact that the thought popped in my head made me absolutely disgusted with myself because I didn’t understand my disorder. At this point I didn’t even know wth intrusive thoughts were let alone pure O. I decided one night to get help after thoughts kept popping in my head that I should commit suicide(even though I wasn’t depressed and in no way shape or form wanted to. The thoughts were scary and dark just like all the others). I went to a therapy session. ONE SESSION that changed my life. I learned that with my disorder this process is normal, and now I know that if an intrusive thoughts happens I can just push it aside mentally. I know that others have this issue as well and it helps so much. Sorry that was extremely long I just wanted to share my story.
OMG...I literally felt the same after my pregnancy as well! And I always wondered why I would get these weird thoughts most of my life! For the most part I have been able to better control my OCD in general with the help of natural medicine for the anxiety.
I had this for about a year and a half. I really considered killing myself... taking Prozac helped me IMMENSELY. Please don’t give up if you’re going through this, it will get better
casey - I have really weird obsession where when I see people on my screen and my obsession quickly calling them “ugly” sort of then I dont know why my mind agrees and my heart thinking its true but I know the real me I don’t see people only by their appearance so it comes in handy that I think I’ll get karma because of this
for those who don't want to go to the doctor, here you go. • i constantly thought i was a psychopath • i thought i was gay • i thought i wanted to have sex with the members of my family. • i thought every human is a criminal waiting to become. and the only reason i'm not a murderer or a rapist is because i haven't been put in a situation that facilitates it. • i thought i was a racist and i hated people that didn't look like me. • i thought i didn't actually like, and didn't deserve the girl i so madly in love with, i was constantly worried about not loving her anymore and was constantly worried about harming her mentally or changing her personality or believes by force. .... of coerce none of this was true, but it felt so real. and living with that was pain on another level. please, PLEASE seek professional help, if you find yourself thinking these or worse, *YOUR DOCTOR WILL NOT JUDGE YOU* .
Thank you for posting this. I’ve had a lot of these thoughts (my bisexuality spared me from developing hocd thankfully Lmao 😂) But it’s gotten really bad for me lately. It feels like I actually think these things, that I want these thoughts, and that I’m only pretending to be a good person. I know that seems crazy, throughout most of the day this is how it feels and I honestly haven’t been able to get through a single day without feeling like I’m going insane or becoming a psychotic, demented person. I just feel like pure o is something not enough doctors are aware of, and even if I were to find an ocd specialist, I’m still not sure whether I have ocd or if I have some other mental problems causing this issue for me. :(
@@fluffynyasquirrel lol tru. But here's the thing. My family would have disowned me & there are a-holes in my extended family who literally would've (tried to) kill me. So.. u r absolutely right but also 🥶
Oh my God. I have this and I had no idea it was an actual thing. It's not exactly easy to google and not something you would want to discuss with someone else. So glad I subscribed!!
ME TOO it’s like once i finally found articles and videos about Pure O it was like someone was looking directly into my brain. Now that I am paying attention to my spirals of doubt, I’ve found that sometimes I can even make myself doubt if I have OCD.
I had this and it was HELL! It started when I was 16-17 and it was SO bad, that I tried to commit suicide : ( The thoughts didn't stop until I fell asleep and I actually needed the radio to be on the whole night so it would distract me even a little from the thoughts. They were the typical ones, sexual and very violent. I honestly believed that I had psychosis or some other. Then suddenly it stopped and I was SO happy! Until it came back when I was 19 : ( It was a little milder but still horrible. It all stopped when I was 22 years old and chose to seek help. I got meds for it and a weekly therapy session. Nowadays I still need to use meds but they help A LOT! I have other diagnosis too, like PTSD, Avoidant personality disorder, generalized anxiety disorder but honestly the OCD caused me the most problems and I'm super happy that even just that is now controlled.
So glad to hear you've got it controlled! I also got a lot of sexual ones and it was horrible but CBT and ERP really helped me learn not to react to these thoughts and now I also feel I have a lot more control! So here's to having control!!!
Does anyone else have fear and intrusive thoughts about breaking the law and ending up in jail? I have been a super straight arrow all my life but I've been stressed and mentally tormenting myself about my accidentally or unknowingly breaking some huge law and having my life ruined. I also sometimes have other types of intrusive thoughts but the criminal one is at the forefront now. I had the violent ones real bad when I was younger. Scary thing is it's all too easy to slip back into.
I had my worst panic attack ever about that I don’t even know what triggered me to think that it just popped up but I’m still not sure if I have pure o
This video made me cry. Ive spent 15 years thinking I was crazy for my thoughts. Thank you for relieving a 15 year stress. Now I know I need to talk to someone and there is a name for what I have.
My experience with pure OCD began a few months ago. It started off as general panic/anxiety attacks and then progressived into anxiety from only intrusive thoughts. I stopped driving for over a month in fear of hitting a pedestrians & I began to isolate myself from friends and refused to spend time with family in fear that I would hurt someone. I can't stand being near knives. I've searched for so many ways to get better but I have such a hard time accepting these thoughts. I find that creative writing and listening to upbeat music helps a bit. I hope to find more strategies because this is no way to live. I feel for other people suffering from this. We will all get through this. Don't give up!!!💗💗
@@isabellawillberg3872 My life has changed dramatically. The ocd and anxiety has subsided a lot since 3 years ago! I know longer have an issue with driving, being near knives or isolation. What has truly helped me is challenging the thoughts and confronting situations that in the past triggered anxiety and intrusive thoughts. I have taught myself to observe thoughts rather than react and life has been uphill since then. Wishing you the best!!
Since I was 12 years old, I've had intrusive thoughts. Throughout the years they've changed. It's scary. Now it's stupid, I have to compare & repeat things in my head over and over. I really don't know what to do.
I got mine also when i was 12 and now i`m 26. I know what are you going through. I`ve just found out recently about pure O OCD. Unwanted thoughts, images and impulses are the worst thing ever! ugh it`s so hard dealing with that...
Same. Started when I was 11. I’m 15 now. It comes and goes, mostly returns in stressful times. I haven’t been diagnosed but I’ve done research for years and I want to talk to someone but my family doesn’t really believe me they say I’m exaggerating but it is extremely distressing. What should I do? Who do I talk to?
molly, talk to a teacher or a trusted adult. you don't need to be specific about what the thoughts are, all you should say is 'i'm in a very bad place mentally, can you please help me to get to see a psychologist'. first with your psychologist should you open up about your thoughts. i've only opened up to my psychologist, and no one else, and i don't plan to do it, cause sometimes some things are better left unsaid, especially if they are really embarrassing/shameful for us.
Thank you for this video! I suffer from Pure O, and intrusive thoughts that really plagued me a few years ago. During that time I would get thoughts about all kinds of disgusting and morally repulsive things. It was very scary, especially for my family who knew little about the subject. Thankfully we went to my doctors and he told me I was a good person, that I would never do any of these things etc and prescribed clomipramine before referring me to the community mental health team. Two weeks later I had a interview with them, who also reinforced the fact I would never do anything like said thoughts and they refereed me to a few self-help CBT sites, which really let me understand my mind better. In a way, I am glad it happened. Since doing CBT and learning more about my brain, I have found my life has changed for the better. I feel stronger and I have been told my confidence has greatly improved. Sure, its not something I am ever going to be 100% cured off, and rumination is something that I suffer with a lot too. But I feel more able to carry on with life now. I simply have a brain with is far to creative for its own good! ^_^
I definitely identify with pure obsessional ocd but not with the compulsive side of washing your hands or cleaning the whole time. It really gets me when I have those horrible thoughts, it can manifest as dark demonic type of images, or memories of a video game that overwhelm and crowd my mental space, which is why I can't play video games.
I feel so weird watching this bc I'm half like "this is 100% me" But the other half is like "I wasn't even diagnosed with OCD to start with wtf" either way! thank you for your work and information
a lot of the time you can hear the symptoms of a mental illness (or a physical illness) and relate to it but it's the severity of the symptoms that is different from actually having the illness.
regardless if you have the illness or if you're diagnosed, you should seek out someone to get help from! You don't have to have a diagnosis to go to therapy, if it's bothering you then it's valid.
Lately I've been having scary thoughts & it frightens the hell out of me! It's to the point that I'm avoiding certain people, places and things. Its not fun at all and I dont wish this on people at all. Thanks Kati!
The also scary thought is that therapists can quick to think that you are a danger to others if you have the thoughts, which makes it that much more scary.
I have this! Took me stinkin' forever to get diagnosed because I had no idea what it was and neither did anyone else. It was hell for a long time before I was officially diagnosed at 19. But my obsessions started at 7. 12 years and no idea what was going on. I am a happy person by nature but it got to the point that I wanted to kill myself because I didn't know what I was going to do, but I was afraid to do that because I was afraid that I would be damned because of my thoughts. At 25, I no longer feel that way. Exposure therapy actually REALLY helped me! It was AWFUL at first but it really helped and am now in an amazing place where my OCD rarely affects me and I can manage it easily. Thank God!!! I hope that more people become knowledgeable about this so another little girl doesn't have to grow up thinking they're demon possessed or going to hell because they can't control their thoughts. 😫. Thanks for this video, Katie, and for raising awareness about mental illness!
hey i have similar story like you. Except i`m still dealing with this. I`ve never visited psychiatrist. What kind of therapy you had? I wish you all the best
@@aylinnf8861 honey you are ok! These thoughts only occur because they represent the opposite of who you actually are and what you actually desire. They are from anxiety and the fact that they fill you with dread instead of longing or delight, means that they are the opposite of your will. They have no power over you
I have Pure "O" OCD. thank you for this video and for including that we actually DO have compulsions, it's just still in our heads. but yeah, we do have triggers, a WORD can remind me of a similiar word that exists as a part of my intrusive thoughts. I had times when I couldn't really listen to music, read books or watch tv shows, lol. Love the video though!
For me, any scenes in hospitals or of injuries would trigger panic attacks, because I temporarily could not distinguish between what was happening onscreen and myself. I had to watch pretty harmless shows for a long time. Disney movies were good :)
I can so relate to this. I have pure o and hypochondria too, so my head would keep spinning around potential diseases esp cancer and I'd stopped reading newspapers and articles bcz every other article having cancer written would make me panicky! And I'd be obsessed with thinking other superstitious thoughts related to it, like if I've read it, OMG I'm finding the word everywhere around that means I have it, I need a doc!!
This was hell growing up with. I had no idea what was wrong with me until late high school/college. I'm 24 now and have a much better handle on it. 24/7 of the thoughts were unbearable at times. Thanks for shedding light on this topic. Blessings!
My pure O seems to just latch on to anything distressing that I happen to be thinking. I'll spend the entire day obsessing about multiple different bad things, especially regarding my health. It's exhausting.
Lol! I get it... we are all supposed to be "neat freaks"? It is just a stereotype & misconception that many people have of OCD. People think keeping an tidy desk at work or color coordinating socks in like OCD. lol If they only knew.......
Pure O is terrible and so scary, mine are philosophical instructive thoughts. I’ve Sally’s tumbled upon some philosophical videos and topics and I of course did more research out of fear which made it even worse. The thoughts come and stay for a while I’ve had one stay for almost 4 months until another came on. I luckily have great friends who have helped me through eh tough times and am so grateful I found videos about how to cope and how others have struggled. If you are dealing with these thoughts I’m sure reassurance hardly works but please know you ARE real and you WILL be okay and WILL overcome this.
Kati, I’ve been stressing bc I’ve been thinking I’m a narcissist for about 2 years. I have empathy, I have hurt people very close to me, like I was controlling to someone in my family at a young age and an old friend. I was also in some bad relationships and rn have insecurities. I am good at listening and I’m good at empathizing. I just over think and obsess over small things and beat myself up when I think I’m being selfish. I’ll neglect myself just to help ppl sometimes bc I think helping me is slfish. That’s another thing is when I act as a therapist to people, they usually seem to feel heard and understood and feel like I give them some pure useful advice. I’m just struggling bc I read all day about narcissism. Find what traits I can relate to and then start freaking out and thinking I’m a narcissist and will almost mimic the traits in my head. I once read narcissists think they’re perfect and I was always told by a close person when I was younger “you think your just so perfect sonny” and I’d feel like shit bc I don’t want to think that. So an intrusive thought I’ll have is “you think your perfect” and I’ll think “I’m not perfect” and I’ll get anxiety and think “I’m perfect” then “NO NO NO IM NOT PERFECT” then I’ll beat myself up bc I’m not being fair to others thinking that, and i think I’m really being dillusional about being perfect when really the dellusion is what I think I believe........ FUCK that was a lot for you to read if you read this
expose yourself to the situations which fears you of, stay there and don't do anything, don't even judge, don't even ruminate.. feel the fear... do this for few times and over the time u feel it is just an unwanted thought... this is how I cured.. I had an intrusive thought of jumping off the building and fear of loosing mind.. for over 6 months.. this is how I cleared
I'm seeking help for this. I'm scared shitless. But my best friend convinced me to go to a psychiatrist and seek help. I'm going to do this before it's too late...
@@chelzyramirez3663 well, I'm doing better! I realized I was fixating on different disorders to try and establish my identity. So, I don't have OCD, but I'm trying to get help. It's still a struggle, I'm trying to see a psychiatrist without having to spend hundreds of dollars. But eventually I'll get there! Thanks for asking
Woo, great to see this video! I also raise awareness for OCD on my channel - and keen to see other people do the same. I can also recommend Kat from Shalom Aleichem as a channel with loads of resources on Pure O. :) The term "Pure O" is a fallacy though, they do have compulsions (I hate it when people call it Pure O, because the compulsions are mental and can be treated in the same way..)
Yess!! I try so hard to suppress them and not blurt them outloud. It's so distressing. I'm doing intense research to find out why i have such an urge to say them outloud.
I knew I was struggling with this for a while now, but this video really "set me free" in a sense. I am regularly seeing a therapist but she doesn't seem that knowledgeable about pure O in particular, and I now feel the courage start telling her about it and explain it to her. Really the worst thing is that the more you try to deny it, the worse it becomes. It's just pure hell. Just ... thanks Kati.
Pure O can be a real bitch to root out, because there's nothing you can do to break the compulsion physically, you have to break the chain of thinking, and describing horrifying or embarrassing stuff to a therapist can be really difficult. And the obsessions are often dug in deep and use all the mind's own resources to try and stop...the mind!...from healing itself. But it can be done.
This is the most enlightening thing I have seen. My entire life I have had this "fear" or "urge" to throw myself out of moving cars. Just what if I would unbuckle my belt and open the door on the highway? WHY? WHY WOULD I DO THAT? It scares the hell out of me. Or in the shower...what if I pushed my razor down on my leg and scraped my skin off? I am not a self harmer. I don't want to hurt myself. But my brain has these horrible intrusive thoughts ALL THE TIME. It usually isn't directed at other people, but they are SO SCARY. And now this. THIS VIDEO. I was planning on looking for a new therapist after we moved in a few weeks bc my depression and anxiety are getting bad again, and I will definitely be showing him/her this. THANK YOU.
i think i probably just watched a video with the potential to change my life. ive been im treatment trying to deal with anxiety panic disorder self harm depression etc for 8 years and little to none improvement because I still have these "intrusive thoughts" all the fucking time and nothing makes them go away. for the past months I've been reading about ocd and thinking that could be it but I don't have compulsions so it didn't quite fit. the thing is, I never brought up this obsessive thoughts in therapy or to my doctor cause they are extremely grafic embarrassing chocking and weird and I don't feel ready to talk about them. maybe the time has come. I have never heard about pure o in my life (I'm from Brazil, maybe this is not well know around here? I had five therapists and six psychiatrists in the last 8 years and nobody mentioned it) but I'll certainly keep looking into researches and stuff like this and eventually talk about it in therapy. thank you, kati, I thank you profusely. keep spreading knowledge!!
Hey guys, I once thought I was suffering with pure O, I felt unable to do anything, was constantly worried by these thoughts, but then guess what? My confusion finally came to an end, the only problem I really had was diagnosing myself with pure O, I labelled myself as having pure O, and everyday I would have the urge to think delusional thoughts. I will give you the solution, the solution is DONT LOOK FOR A SOLUTION, you are trying to solve something that doesnt exist, hence creating the problem yourself, I wish I could go back and tell myself this wheb I was google searching solutions for hours, our brains are very powerful, we have to fight urges in everyday life such as urges to smoke, urges to spend money etc, similiar to this scenario you have formed the urge in your head to think delusional thoughts, seperate the thoughts in your head with actual thoughts & urgeful thoughts, and when you have them recognise them & understand you have the urge to think these thoughts and they dont mean anything, also clear your life of any unnesecary stresses and i would recommend a strong belief in God, I have a strong belief in Allah, and that is what keeps me so confident and strong, but anyway hope my comment helps, I got through this & so will you
the thing that helped me the most with my pure o is the Buddhist practice of mindful awareness. you are not your thoughts. you are not your emotions. you are not your images. you are the observer of your thoughts, emotions and images. keep an open mind. mindful awareness. it will change you, but time takes time.
It is absolutely fine to have graphic, embarrassing, shocking thoughts. Everyone has them once in a while. Random thoughts are part of the human existence. If you keep holding on to your intrusive thoughts and trying to scrutinize them and make them go away, they'll only grow stronger. You have to just allow your mind to flow. Learn to shrug, learn to laugh at your most absurd thoughts. Violent thoughts; sexual thoughts; disgusting thoughts. We all have them. It's human.
We all think mental health should be destigmatize but we all struggle to talk about our own issues. This is my experience: I initially had regular ocd, it's always been very secret for me, noone would notice unless I told them. Lately it got almost pure O, my ruminations got worse and worse. It's terrible, sometimes I think I can't get through this, that there's no way out and that my life will never be normal/happy. If you're going through the same thing please seek help and don't be ashamed of yourself for who you are. You are not alone.
Jesus. I always wondered why I got these types of thoughts. There’s OCD in my family and they have different compulsions from what I suffer from. I thought I was just fucked up in the head. Thank you so much, this brings me a bit more peace.
There can definitely also be physical compulsions too, some of those are checking and that might be checking what you emotionally feel and evaluating if that is bad, checking the body for a physical response because pure o can come with a physical response and reassurance seeking. ERP and meds can both help.
Thank you for making this! I've dealt with this type of OCD in the past. In my own experience, I've found that the book 'Brain Lock' by Jeffrey Schwartz really helped me learn how to break the cognitive cycle that fuels the obsession. Despite the name 'Pure O,' it's important to identify the cognitive compulsions and to work on eliminating them. Examples include obsessively seeking reassurance, mental checks, going out of your way to prevent yourself from acting on impulse, etc. The more you do these, the worse the obsessions get! A good mantra to remember is that thoughts are not reality.
Oh my god this is me to a tee. From waking up, I get intrusive thoughts rushing in “what if you’ve got psychosis, what if you go crazy” and then it’s almost like I start to convince myself that I have!! Haha, I start to feel paranoid and checking rooms , just to get annoyed at myself for doing these things as they just make me think even more that I am schizophrenic😭 Honestly, these are just thoughts and they do not need reassurance or a response. Try the book/audiobook “Overcoming unwanted intrusive thoughts” it has helped me so far, I’m going to continue the practices and hope for the best ❤️ lotta love you you
Thank you @KatiMorton for explaining Pure O! As a sufferer, I had a therapist who did not know how to help me with my sexually violent thoughts. That was 5 yrs ago. Now I have a great therapist who understands me:) My question to you: Why aren't some therapists knowledgeable about this subtype of OCD?
it's good to know that this is a real thing, because typically when OCD is talked about in informative videos and classes, they really do emphasize the necessity of the presence of compulsions; the problem is that for people who don't have those compulsions, it can cause doubt as to whether there's a real clinical disorder there (at least, that's kinda how _i_ thought)
Thank you for doing this! I tell people I have the obsessive and intrusive thoughts that are part of OCD but no one thinks that it could be a real thing. Finally I can show them this incredible video!
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!! (CBT therapy can make any OCD worse. Look for a therapist that specializes in “exposure response therapy”. If they aren’t trained in this, don’t waste your time.
I feel like this is me. But I’m too afraid to say how bad my thoughts are because they are so graphic. Whenever I get these thoughts I try to pray so I can “balance” out the bad thought or stop it. It doesn’t work usually. The thought just gets worse. I’ve never been diagnosed but I feel like I have OCD. I also stress out about events that I know never occurred. Like “what if I just told that lady she is ugly and fat”. Even though I know I didn’t say that I stress about it.
Erica dude, I'm right there with you. I'm sorry you're having a tough time with it. I've done that before too, the praying thing for it. I also get the doubt of 'did I just do /say that? No, right? I don't know I don't think so? You're definitely not alone!
i have it too, what i find works best is to take the power away from the thought. this is done by not reacting to it. what i say to myself is 'let it go in through one ear and out the other'. you will get better, especially if you start meditation
Same. I’m also afraid to say I might have this and describe it but it sounds so familiar. I just hate to self-diagnose. I’m going to show this to my therapist and psychiatrist and discuss it with them.
Lisa-Michelle Morgan that's a good idea! And honestly, I was super nervous to say something too but honestly what makes me feel better is that it's not stuff that'll phase them :) even as disturbing as it is. It's also super relieving to tell someone
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!! (CBT therapy can make any OCD worse. Look for a therapist that specializes in “exposure response therapy”. If they aren’t trained in this, don’t waste your time.
I've struggled to explain this to so many people. Thank you, I've been dealing with this since I was a kid and have never had the words to properly define what was going on in my head.
For me personally Pure OCD feels like you are in court everyday you are the prosecuter, the lawyer on both sides, you are the jury, the judge, the audience, and your own witness. It feels like everyday I need to battle myself in court and argue "evidence"(thoughts memories sometimes false memories) as to why I am not a rapist, a murderer, a pedophile, and so on.. Memories are the worst because since you can not remeber specifically every detail it is so easy for your mind to change the memory I always use this example when I try to explain this (I hope it makes sense)🙏. "You are an adult 20s or so and you get a memory, you remeber you went to the park when you were 6 and you were playing and suddenly saw a butterfly. You go and grab the butterfly but at the early age of 6 you didn't know that if you touch a butterfly to hard it could die , this memory suddenly comes to you and a voice inside your head (the OCD) says "oh YOU killed that butterfly" "YOU wanted to" "YOU probably liked it" "Are YOU sure YOUR not a murder" "what if that was an early sighn you are messed up" " end of story. So in conclusion at some point you can't even trust your memories you will now forever remeber and organize that memory as "evidence" that you are a "BAD PERSON". Now for the reality you are not you didnt know you were 6 for crying out loud there alot of memories, actions, and things that people do by accident. Sometimes the way you grew up what you knew what you didn't know. What I learned is present you can not judge past you. YOU ARE NOT THE SAME PERSON YOU WERE LAST YEAR LAST MONTH LAST WEEK EVEN. Everyday you learn something new maybe you didn't know something was wrong that ok well now you do. Thats it. Thats were one should stop. But....its not that easy you have to keep reminding yourself everything a new piece of "evidence" shows up of what logic lies behind it. The shame guilt and PANIC behind every thought is real it really truly does feel like you did something horrible unspeakable. When in reality it is the furthest thing you could possibly do. For me it feels like OCD or Pure OCD is just a different version of a phobia. It takes what you consider to be the worst person on this planet (aka a murder, pedo, rapist...) and then you become so scared to become them that you start to look for any signs in memories thoughts actions that could indicate you might be this horrible person. The thought I consistently get is "what is I am a horrible human being and I just don't know it?" I know it makes no sense its just a fear I have and I become obsessed with looking to see if I can find any evidence to back up that fear. Its a horrible court game played every day. When in reality I actually wouldn't hurt a fly. I think for me personally it stems from the want to always be perfect and to always be a goody tooshoes. I think maybe for me personally I am so afraid of doing anything bad or making a mistake that now I am just looking for things to punish myself for not being perfect all the time. I actually love children and was a tutor for a long time i have always been great with children so for me doing any harm to them would be my worst fear😰. I know I would never in a million years do ANYTHING. Yet I can not help but be scared and torment myself. Anyway that was a long rant I am sorry. Please be kind to others because sometimes I just want to roll up into little ball.
I have one small comment Kati. ERP is definitely necessary for Pure O, just as necessary as for OCD with physical compulsions. I'd argue ERP is more effective than CBT for OCD, all types of OCD. In my experience alone, ERP helped my Pure O tremendously, in conjunction with CBT. But CBT alone does not help Pure O as much as CBT with ERP. Pure O is really the same thing as OCD with physical compulsions, and needs the same treatment. Pure O may be harder to treat to therapists without experience with it, but with a therapist experienced with Pure O can treat it effectively with ERP. It's about finding those mental compulsions and refraining from those, since people with Pure O DO have compulsions, they're just internal. Other than that, thank you for talking about such an important topic! :)
Thank you, watching this video and reading the comments makes me feel better. I was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago, and I’m 23. Before I was diagnosed I felt so shitty about myself. I used to combat the horrible sexual thoughts with extremely violent ones when I was younger because it numbed me for the moment. I am on SSRIs right now, but I find I need to watch these videos once in awhile because it’s so hard to explain to people that I’m suffering when there is little to no physical evidence, like compulsions. To everyone out there - remember that your suffering is real, and that you don’t need to justify it.
These videos and the comments sections makes me feel better as well. Honestly, it is comforting to know that there are people out there that can relate to what you are experiencing. Just imagine I was first diagnosed with OCD about 30 years ago. This was before the internet and I always felt rather alone in this condition. I confided in my dad about it and his advice was "Be a man, suck it up and push forward". Yeah... not very helpful, huh? I don't blame him really, nobody knew about OCD then.
2:57 man, it's crazy having a problem for years, and then years later, finding out that there is a very reliable clinical diagnosis which seems to fit the kinds of things you were going through at the time. to put it more concisely, it's crazy finding out that some hardship you've been going through is a "thing", and that there's a _word_ for it; a term
I’ve begun the process of writing a book on my experience with Pure O. It’ll likely be called “Oh god, I think I might be gay!” My intrusive thoughts are based unfortunately in pretty violent thoughts as well as the frequent fear that I may be gay when I know I’m not sexually attracted to men. I’d love to collaborate with you on the book, Kati! Perhaps quite you on occasion throughout the book!
Thank you Kati. I have Pure OCD since 12-13 years old (now 43) and I haven't managed to get over it. It caused me chronic anxiety which led me to chronic depression (along with other factors like hypersensitive personality). SSRI's never worked for me for OCD only for anxiety-depression-social phobia. Sometimes I am successfully avoid to follow the thoughts and images but then it come back strong and feel so exhausted and helpless. I have done interpersonal therapy but never CBT or ERP and I want to try it. Keep fighting to all of you who struggle with this problem.
I relate to a lot of this. I probably don’t even have pure o but, since April, I had terrible sexual thoughts and I hated myself for it and even thought if suicide. It sort of calmed down but, I still get intrusive thoughts from time to time and recently, I’ve always found myself thinking about near death situations that have a 5% chance of happening and start to panic for one second before calming myself down and realizing none of the thoughts are real, get thoughts about my loved ones dying or me accidentally killing them. I’m not really ashamed of the thoughts about death but, I’m more ashamed about the sexual intrusive thoughts. I might talk to my school therapist tomorrow though.
I assume you haven't been diagnosed if you didnt know. But I think I'm in the same boat. Get constant thoughts that are just horrible. Eberytime I try fall asleep or relax the images keep coming into my mind
I have been regularly sitting for hours trying to fix things in my head, trying to obtain some sort of mental closure each time a new realisation comes into my head. Is this a strong sign of OCD?
I'm such a worrier when I realise I have ocd pure o. my past mistakes make me feel so negative and I want to be positive. I'm married to an amazing woman who comforts me and has always helped me. my mind sometimes deceives me and makes me feel terrible. my dad passed away last week and everytime I see my dad's picture of him smiling, I have to look again and again as my brain makes me feel like is he really smiling? was he disappointed in me ever? will I stay strong and get through this. and I always tell myself ofcourse he's smiling ☺. he always smiled and spent about of time with his family. I love him and always will. thank you soo much for your videos as u really inspire me to be myself and keep strong. thank you everyone who also understands me and hope you all have a great day. x
I’ve never heard of this and been following you for a long time. My psych told me she suspects OCD. I didn’t understand so I started digging for internal OCD. This was the first video that came up. Thanks again Kati. I kind of wish this had a different name because OCD research is dominated by the compulsive side of things and it just presents so differently like cptsd and ptsd
Omg I wish I had known this information when I started struggling with OCD (Pure O) at age 13. I also struggled with anxiety and depression (of course) until 18, when I started taking an SSRI and the OCD went away and depression lessened. Much later, at 33, I found out the "root" of all of it was actually undiagnosed ADHD. Thanks for your videos- i would love to see more on ADHD in women/adults. 💕
I’ve had the POCD subtype for a while… intrusive thoughts about children, constantly thinking I’m a child predator in the making, going out of my way to avoid kids or refusing to watch anything that has a kid in it….
I have had these thoughts for years, It's highly distressing but you learn to live with it. It's incredibly interesting to watch this video though, It's nice to know there is a diagnosis for this. I was always told they were just 'intrusive thoughts'. Every time I have one I have to tell myself it's an 'intrusive thought' and it helps it go away. I don't know if this is normal but they tend to stay the same for a while then I'll get a new one? It sounds ridiculous but I struggle to hold a hot drink around people out of fear I'll chuck it in their face. I then have to abandon my hot drink because of the worry i'll lob it over someone. (I have many different 'thoughts' and it's embarrassing to share them because some of them are so horrific but It's reassuring to know other people have them too.)
Yay! I've been looking forward to you making a video on intrusive thoughts for a while. Thank you for making it so easy to understand and follow as always. 💛
Actually, I believe ERP has in recent years surpassed CBT and has proven itself to be the most effective treatment for this condition. ACT seems to be used quite often as an adjunct to ERP.
I suffer from schizophrenia but find myself with this type of mindset many times as it seems to kick in as a self defense mechanism especially when outdoors. I noticed one way to make the conflicting positive thoughts win out over the negative ones is by looking at people's faces directly which helps me to snap out of the negative fantasy thinking as i all of sudden see them as people and tell myself that was some foolish negative thinking. Thanks for the always excellent videos Kati Morton :D
I have been having thoughts like this and it's been making me worry about myself. I never thought I was a bad person but I have always had intrusive suicidal thoughts (I'm not suicidal) along with thoughts of hurting other people. When I was young I had the thought "Im going to jump out of the car right now" and I didn't have the reasoning skills at the time to know opening a car door on highway 19 is bad. Thank God for seat belts and booster seats. Because my thoughts have been becoming more disruptive in my life, I made an appointment and have been doing research on OCD because I also do things like rewriting pages and pages of things I written because I don't like how it looks and it'll cause we stress and anxiety to just leave it. I'm going to definitely bring this up in my appointment. Thanks for making this video. It's helped me.
I suffered with this my whole life along with general anxiety and depression. They’re all beasts. Ugh. It’s funny for so long I thought I just had obsessions but then I realized that I have a ton of mental compulsions too. My OCD is almost entirely about perfectionism with myself and my experiences. I obsess about interactions with people, stressful things at work, if some part of my body isn’t perfect. It’s awful. I’ve been off meds for 5 years, have many coping mechanisms and therapy has helped a lot but it’s hard. It’s also hard for me to do ERP because of these hArder to see mental compulsions. I wish OCD specialists were covered in my insurance plan but they’re not so I can’t see an ERP specialist. 😭
you just described the EXACT way ive been feeling the last two weeks. the ontario covid lockdown got extended to 6 weeks and it triggered a lot of anxiety that led to intrusive thoughts. i convinced myself i was going insane and labelled myself every mental illness in the dsm until i found this. I'm currently waiting to see the doctor this week and hopefully get a referral to a psychiatrist too. my mom has ocpd but i resonate so much with pure o OCD. i feel so much better knowing im not insane and that there is hope. im looking forward to doing CT and getting medicated. THANK YOU SO MUCH
Angy G I just had a consultation over the phone to begin my treatment, it's more common than you think and there are people that can help you find the tools to deal with this. You are not alone.
Thanks for this...it definitely helps create conciousness around the realities of what it really means to struggle with OCD. The more we speak about it the better others around us can be educated.
Ummm I know this may sound a little under-rated but... when it comes to intrusive/ obsessive thoughts, the best way I console myself is by reminding myself what Albus Dumbledore told Harry Potter in the first book when he was feeling anxious about the Sorting Hat telling him he could do well in Slytherin because he had Voldemort-induced powers such as the ability to speak in Parsel tongue etc etc. He said "it is not our abilities that define us. it's our choices that makes us different from others." i'd rephrase that and be like it's not our unintentional thoughts or abilities that define us. it's our choices and actions that defines us. my therapist told me thought is not equal to action. so doesnt matter how messed up the thought is, it's not reality. i know it's easier said than done. when those intrusive thoughts plague you, it get's very nauseating and stifling.
Wow, okay, you described some of my thoughts exactly. I thought everyone had those kind of intrusive thoughts followed by the spiral of "what does this say about me" but it sounds like that might be pure O?
For me , I think it’s more of a anxiety disorder. I have had some of the worst instructive thoughts imaginable which cause severe depression and anxiety. It started when I was young and it gave me a severe anxiety attack. My psychiatrist says everyone has these thoughts. The problem with OCD is the anxiety makes people linger on these thoughts. The unknown and the what if is actually at play here. I actually call Pure O” the “what if” disease because that is what it is.
Exactly! What if a mole or spot is cancer? What if I ran over a pedestrian while driving? What if I were to snap and throw a baby off a balcony at a family gathering? These are typical thoughts which plague pure O & OCD sufferers night and day. Speaking of the unknown a fellow sufferer I met who claims to have recovered from OCD offered this advice: The key is to learn to accept and even embrace the unknown and to not do rituals if that is a coping mechanism. The rituals keep you in a perpetual OCD hamster wheel. Meaning, they bring instant relief, which is short lived, as you are stuck in a vicious cycle. An example would be an individual with health related OCD & anxiety, who's preoccupation is cancer. They typically spend enormous amounts of time every day checking their bodies for signs of cancer. Skin, mouth, armpits etc.. Also, comparing 'symptoms' or a anything vaguely suspicious with pics & info they have gathered online. The sufferer has to say to themselves "I just might have cancer". Learn to live with the uncertainty of it all and stop the rituals. Over time the OCD lessens and in best case scenario disappears, but the sufferer needs to stay ever vigilant. Thanks for mentioning this! You never know how casual statements you make may help others.
@@finn3102 Yea but, Try having this curse (that’s what I also call it), but your dream is to be a pilot. It really sucks to have this disease. For those of you who don’t know, in order to be a pilot (I’ve flown a plane in flight school and love aviation and studying it) you need to be medically certified before you can get your license. And I kept putting it off but I quit school and I know I wouldn’t get my medical because no matter how calm ( when I’m in the plane all my worries go away, I’m so focused on flying) I am in the plane it wouldn’t matter. It really does suck to have this curse. It feels like a demon that ruins your life. I’m on anti depressants and anti anxiety meds and I quit because I knew I would never get my first class medical.
I read an article was written by a person who has Pure O and they wrote that cognitive restructuring therapy doesn't work because it is supposed to rationalize that those intrusive thoughts aren't true but the analysis of the intrusive thoughts can make them more deeply entrenched. It may depend on the person, but according to the article ERP is the best treatment. This is the link to the article if anyone wants more details on this: www.theguardian.com/society/2013/aug/31/pure-ocd-the-naked-truth Again this may vary from person to person, but this is what I have found from a bit of research that I have done. To put things into context, I am certain I have Pure O and only found out this recently. I have never been to therapy for it but I have tried to rationalize on my own knowing that my thoughts were wildly untrue but yet part of me still had self doubt that I could just be a psychopath as well as being no help to stop the intrusive thoughts from rushing in. So from my experience trying to rid this thoughts myself, analysis and rationalization did not help.
@@chelzyramirez3663 I can't say I've overcome Pure O, because though my intrusive thoughts are less frequent they are still something I have to deal with. But my intrusive thoughts are much more manageable now that I know it is Pure O. Before I had learned that my intrusive thoughts were caused by Pure O, a mental illness, I thought I was a terrible person who chose to think these thoughts. Finding out that I had Pure O gave me a sense of relief. Since writing this comment I have gone to therapy, began consistently practicing mindfulness, and have been more open to talking about my experience with this type of OCD. Although I may never truly "overcome" Pure O, I can more easily let these thoughts go and pay them less mind. I am in a much better headspace now than I have ever been and I get to continue my journey of self growth.
I personally love ACT therapy. It became helpful when I got to a point in my CBT work where I was getting frustrated over having the anxious thought in the first place. CBT helped me recognize if/ how the thought was distorted but that never seemed to fully help.
ACT is great for thought-related issues! I casually got into it because the therapist I was talking to was using the method, and it makes so much sense. It´s also very practical in a way, you need to learn to accept your thoughts and don´t be negatively influenced by them. ALso not to get lost in your mind but go back to reality, so you can move on with your life and just accept those thoughts without engaging. Slowly those thoughts will be less present and less disturbing...it´s a whole process but is worth it and helps with other issues too
I deal with this sometimes...I get really bad intrusive thoughts such as jumping off of buildings...even though I DONT want to and I DONT feel suicidal. It’s like this extremely intense fear. I know what is happening when I have these intrusive thoughts so every time I tell myself it is my ocd and eventually it goes away. I’m lucky to avoid a panic attack after one though!!! So important for anyone dealing with intrusive thoughts to be knowledgeable about the symptoms of OCD!
OCD: when you become so obsessed with a problem that the obsession becomes more of a problem than the actual problem
Matthew Hankosky, Agreed.
it’s horrific
Couldn't be described better than this!!!
Exactly!
Infatheline you nailed it lol
The thoughts wouldn't cause distress or anxiety IF you were really a psychopath. You are anxious because you believe that thought is horrible and would never do it.
but also you can get desensitized to the thought and as a result are not disturbed by it anymore.
Sooo true
Spot on
This is very reassuring
@@jeansforbeans6836 you're feeding my intrusive thought when you said this.
As someone who's experienced this, it's a living hell! You can't live a normal life you're literally being tortured by your own brain and it's mentally crippling. I'm praying for anyone who's experiencing this. There IS hope I promise, I've completely recovered after seeking help. Love you and stay strong!!
How did you do it ?
Omg how??
Yes I'm sick of it
@@matayagreen2414 Find a therapist and check out all the resources. You're not alone. Sending you love and compassion.
@@chaunceylocklear3661 I am seeing one she gave me some stuff to look at
I feel a lot less alone
Madeline Coe me too
Glad you feel relief
Me too :’)
Ah I’m crying.
Me too
Me too
For me it's died down, as soon as I accepted that my thoughts can never harm anyone, it calmed down.
Pure O sucks. That's what I'm dealing with and the intrusive thoughts and images really give me terrible anxiety. ugh.
***** Thankfully I am. However I got recommended to take medication and I'm not too sure about that.
IKR. Mine was so bad I had constant anxiety and couldn't sleep for 2 years. I'm happy I'm not alone.
Hang tight brother
I understand your struggle, I'm going through the same
Get help... PLEASE
I think you just explained my whole life. I never brought this up in therapy cause I'm scared of what she would think (that I'm a psychopath). Wow. Just wow.
Yeah. I really feel you. You don't want to explain your horrifying thoughts because you fear you will deeply disturb the other person. And even weirder still, repressing the thoughts when asked about them seems like a basic form or control.
I know exactly how you feel I'm currently go through what she is describing I want to cry because this whole time I've been going to therapy and I can't get myself to tell the therapist the nature of these thoughts for fear of being judged or a psychopath
Me too! I told my therapist some of the less bad ones and she didn't seem too horrified, but I still can't even say all of them.
You should certainly bring it up. You're certainly not a psycho, and gettung therapy in this area could be very liberating. You're freedom from pure o, is way more valuable than the fear of someone thinking that you may be psycho. Although im peetty sure your therapist wouldn't judge you or anything. Peace in love 🙂 PS. I started trusting and believing in Christ more and more and this has completely liberated me from pure o and fear of any kind . All love my friend
Just to be clear, Pure O is generally like, 95% of the time you are FLOODED with these thoughts and feelings. It doesn't end, except when heavily medicated or extremely busy. I still get echoes of it but when it was full blown I likely would have killed myself if I couldn't find treatment. It's horrific. Would probably rather have both of my arms chopped off than relapse.
thank you so much for this. i get physically nauseated from my intrusive thoughts
Me too!
Sem here
same i hate it
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!!
I have pure O and it sucks. I remember back as young as 8 have intrusive thoughts. It went away for a while then came back viciously as a teen. I kept it to myself because I knew it wasn’t me, I knew something was wrong but I was too scared to voice my concerns because I thought if I talked to someone they would think I was crazy. The intrusiveness eventually subsided for about 6 years.
Fast forward to pregnancy and having a child. My hormones were thrown completely out of wack and once again intrusive thoughts came back and hit me like a truck. It was almost constant. It would play on my worst fears(loved ones dying, me hurting them, suicide and leaving my child motherless). Even though I 100% know none of this would ever happen the fact that the thought popped in my head made me absolutely disgusted with myself because I didn’t understand my disorder. At this point I didn’t even know wth intrusive thoughts were let alone pure O.
I decided one night to get help after thoughts kept popping in my head that I should commit suicide(even though I wasn’t depressed and in no way shape or form wanted to. The thoughts were scary and dark just like all the others). I went to a therapy session. ONE SESSION that changed my life. I learned that with my disorder this process is normal, and now I know that if an intrusive thoughts happens I can just push it aside mentally. I know that others have this issue as well and it helps so much.
Sorry that was extremely long I just wanted to share my story.
I love you Bri. Hugs my friend I feel you.
OMG...I literally felt the same after my pregnancy as well! And I always wondered why I would get these weird thoughts most of my life! For the most part I have been able to better control my OCD in general with the help of natural medicine for the anxiety.
We are not alone ✌🏻
I'm crying in bed because it's so overwhelming to Even open up about.
Erin how are you my friend
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!!
I hope you are doing better these days
I had this for about a year and a half. I really considered killing myself... taking Prozac helped me IMMENSELY. Please don’t give up if you’re going through this, it will get better
casey s yeah I’ve been feeling like this lately. My pure O is beating my ass right now. Taking Lexapro, but it gets better, then gets real bad
casey - I have it too developed few months ago
casey - I have really weird obsession where when I see people on my screen and my obsession quickly calling them “ugly” sort of then I dont know why my mind agrees and my heart thinking its true but I know the real me I don’t see people only by their appearance so it comes in handy that I think I’ll get karma because of this
Dub Kodiak I don’t take meds and really wanna fight it
Dub Kodiak same with me. I am taking lexapro as well for OCD and some days are good, then it gets bad again
for those who don't want to go to the doctor, here you go.
• i constantly thought i was a psychopath
• i thought i was gay
• i thought i wanted to have sex with the members of my family.
• i thought every human is a criminal waiting to become. and the only reason i'm not a murderer or a rapist is because i haven't been put in a situation that facilitates it.
• i thought i was a racist and i hated people that didn't look like me.
• i thought i didn't actually like, and didn't deserve the girl i so madly in love with, i was constantly worried about not loving her anymore and was constantly worried about harming her mentally or changing her personality or believes by force.
....
of coerce none of this was true, but it felt so real. and living with that was pain on another level.
please, PLEASE seek professional help, if you find yourself thinking these or worse, *YOUR DOCTOR WILL NOT JUDGE YOU* .
Thank you for posting this. I’ve had a lot of these thoughts (my bisexuality spared me from developing hocd thankfully Lmao 😂) But it’s gotten really bad for me lately. It feels like I actually think these things, that I want these thoughts, and that I’m only pretending to be a good person. I know that seems crazy, throughout most of the day this is how it feels and I honestly haven’t been able to get through a single day without feeling like I’m going insane or becoming a psychotic, demented person. I just feel like pure o is something not enough doctors are aware of, and even if I were to find an ocd specialist, I’m still not sure whether I have ocd or if I have some other mental problems causing this issue for me. :(
Thanks man those are pretty much the exact same thoughts in my head and they suck like shit
Correction-writing about it, as I had shared a journal entry with her.
"i thought i was gay" as if its a crime😭
(my pocd made me think im attracted to men when im literally a lesbian)
@@fluffynyasquirrel lol tru. But here's the thing.
My family would have disowned me & there are a-holes in my extended family who literally would've (tried to) kill me.
So.. u r absolutely right but also 🥶
Oh my God. I have this and I had no idea it was an actual thing. It's not exactly easy to google and not something you would want to discuss with someone else. So glad I subscribed!!
SAME
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!!
ME TOO it’s like once i finally found articles and videos about Pure O it was like someone was looking directly into my brain. Now that I am paying attention to my spirals of doubt, I’ve found that sometimes I can even make myself doubt if I have OCD.
I had this and it was HELL! It started when I was 16-17 and it was SO bad, that I tried to commit suicide : ( The thoughts didn't stop until I fell asleep and I actually needed the radio to be on the whole night so it would distract me even a little from the thoughts. They were the typical ones, sexual and very violent. I honestly believed that I had psychosis or some other. Then suddenly it stopped and I was SO happy! Until it came back when I was 19 : ( It was a little milder but still horrible. It all stopped when I was 22 years old and chose to seek help. I got meds for it and a weekly therapy session. Nowadays I still need to use meds but they help A LOT! I have other diagnosis too, like PTSD, Avoidant personality disorder, generalized anxiety disorder but honestly the OCD caused me the most problems and I'm super happy that even just that is now controlled.
So glad to hear you've got it controlled! I also got a lot of sexual ones and it was horrible but CBT and ERP really helped me learn not to react to these thoughts and now I also feel I have a lot more control! So here's to having control!!!
Indira Pandora did it help
I hear you. keep going my fellow pure o warrior xx
Indira Pandora I suffered those thoughts when I was 5 years old till now. Pure. Hell. PURE HELL.
Yes I haven't been seriously suicidal but I've had thoughts about it
Does anyone else have fear and intrusive thoughts about breaking the law and ending up in jail? I have been a super straight arrow all my life but I've been stressed and mentally tormenting myself about my accidentally or unknowingly breaking some huge law and having my life ruined. I also sometimes have other types of intrusive thoughts but the criminal one is at the forefront now. I had the violent ones real bad when I was younger. Scary thing is it's all too easy to slip back into.
I have that fear so much and it’s pure o
i have this fear everyday too
I had my worst panic attack ever about that I don’t even know what triggered me to think that it just popped up but I’m still not sure if I have pure o
@@rulingvenus yes! Those kind of programmes seem to make it worse.
@@mairimka8757 literally me 😅😩
This video made me cry. Ive spent 15 years thinking I was crazy for my thoughts. Thank you for relieving a 15 year stress. Now I know I need to talk to someone and there is a name for what I have.
My experience with pure OCD began a few months ago. It started off as general panic/anxiety attacks and then progressived into anxiety from only intrusive thoughts. I stopped driving for over a month in fear of hitting a pedestrians & I began to isolate myself from friends and refused to spend time with family in fear that I would hurt someone. I can't stand being near knives. I've searched for so many ways to get better but I have such a hard time accepting these thoughts. I find that creative writing and listening to upbeat music helps a bit. I hope to find more strategies because this is no way to live. I feel for other people suffering from this. We will all get through this. Don't give up!!!💗💗
How r u now
@@isabellawillberg3872 My life has changed dramatically. The ocd and anxiety has subsided a lot since 3 years ago! I know longer have an issue with driving, being near knives or isolation. What has truly helped me is challenging the thoughts and confronting situations that in the past triggered anxiety and intrusive thoughts. I have taught myself to observe thoughts rather than react and life has been uphill since then.
Wishing you the best!!
How are you?
Since I was 12 years old, I've had intrusive thoughts. Throughout the years they've changed. It's scary. Now it's stupid, I have to compare & repeat things in my head over and over. I really don't know what to do.
Michelle Elez try CBT it helps
I got mine also when i was 12 and now i`m 26. I know what are you going through. I`ve just found out recently about pure O OCD. Unwanted thoughts, images and impulses are the worst thing ever! ugh it`s so hard dealing with that...
Same. Started when I was 11. I’m 15 now. It comes and goes, mostly returns in stressful times. I haven’t been diagnosed but I’ve done research for years and I want to talk to someone but my family doesn’t really believe me they say I’m exaggerating but it is extremely distressing. What should I do? Who do I talk to?
molly, talk to a teacher or a trusted adult. you don't need to be specific about what the thoughts are, all you should say is 'i'm in a very bad place mentally, can you please help me to get to see a psychologist'. first with your psychologist should you open up about your thoughts. i've only opened up to my psychologist, and no one else, and i don't plan to do it, cause sometimes some things are better left unsaid, especially if they are really embarrassing/shameful for us.
Wow I'm glad I don't feel so alone anymore, I feel understood...thank you so much for this
Thank you for this video! I suffer from Pure O, and intrusive thoughts that really plagued me a few years ago. During that time I would get thoughts about all kinds of disgusting and morally repulsive things. It was very scary, especially for my family who knew little about the subject. Thankfully we went to my doctors and he told me I was a good person, that I would never do any of these things etc and prescribed clomipramine before referring me to the community mental health team. Two weeks later I had a interview with them, who also reinforced the fact I would never do anything like said thoughts and they refereed me to a few self-help CBT sites, which really let me understand my mind better.
In a way, I am glad it happened. Since doing CBT and learning more about my brain, I have found my life has changed for the better. I feel stronger and I have been told my confidence has greatly improved. Sure, its not something I am ever going to be 100% cured off, and rumination is something that I suffer with a lot too. But I feel more able to carry on with life now. I simply have a brain with is far to creative for its own good! ^_^
How are you now? Do you still have thoughts ?
Yes far too creative !
I definitely identify with pure obsessional ocd but not with the compulsive side of washing your hands or cleaning the whole time. It really gets me when I have those horrible thoughts, it can manifest as dark demonic type of images, or memories of a video game that overwhelm and crowd my mental space, which is why I can't play video games.
I feel so weird watching this bc I'm half like "this is 100% me" But the other half is like "I wasn't even diagnosed with OCD to start with wtf"
either way! thank you for your work and information
I was thinking the exact same thing!
same!x
a lot of the time you can hear the symptoms of a mental illness (or a physical illness) and relate to it but it's the severity of the symptoms that is different from actually having the illness.
regardless if you have the illness or if you're diagnosed, you should seek out someone to get help from! You don't have to have a diagnosis to go to therapy, if it's bothering you then it's valid.
Pure O is a fucking bitch man. It will make you obsess and worry about anything and everything mentally. It is such a mind fuck man
Lately I've been having scary thoughts & it frightens the hell out of me! It's to the point that I'm avoiding certain people, places and things. Its not fun at all and I dont wish this on people at all. Thanks Kati!
Same here, it’s the literal worst. I hope you’re doing a lot better seeing as this was a while ago but, these thoughts are so hard to get rid of.
The also scary thought is that therapists can quick to think that you are a danger to others if you have the thoughts, which makes it that much more scary.
My husband has Pure O and I'm just praying and praying we get to see a therapist soon!
I have this! Took me stinkin' forever to get diagnosed because I had no idea what it was and neither did anyone else. It was hell for a long time before I was officially diagnosed at 19. But my obsessions started at 7. 12 years and no idea what was going on. I am a happy person by nature but it got to the point that I wanted to kill myself because I didn't know what I was going to do, but I was afraid to do that because I was afraid that I would be damned because of my thoughts. At 25, I no longer feel that way. Exposure therapy actually REALLY helped me! It was AWFUL at first but it really helped and am now in an amazing place where my OCD rarely affects me and I can manage it easily. Thank God!!! I hope that more people become knowledgeable about this so another little girl doesn't have to grow up thinking they're demon possessed or going to hell because they can't control their thoughts. 😫. Thanks for this video, Katie, and for raising awareness about mental illness!
hey i have similar story like you. Except i`m still dealing with this. I`ve never visited psychiatrist. What kind of therapy you had? I wish you all the best
Thanks for sharing. Praise God!
I know this comment is old but it's such a relief to hear success stories
I am that little girl 😟
@@aylinnf8861 honey you are ok! These thoughts only occur because they represent the opposite of who you actually are and what you actually desire. They are from anxiety and the fact that they fill you with dread instead of longing or delight, means that they are the opposite of your will. They have no power over you
I had no idea this existed, but I think it describes me perfectly. Thank you for this video.
I have Pure "O" OCD. thank you for this video and for including that we actually DO have compulsions, it's just still in our heads. but yeah, we do have triggers, a WORD can remind me of a similiar word that exists as a part of my intrusive thoughts. I had times when I couldn't really listen to music, read books or watch tv shows, lol. Love the video though!
For me, any scenes in hospitals or of injuries would trigger panic attacks, because I temporarily could not distinguish between what was happening onscreen and myself. I had to watch pretty harmless shows for a long time. Disney movies were good :)
this is so true for me holy shit. I get triggered by colours, ice cream, just reading about things which remind me of what I’m woRryIng. About.
I can so relate to this. I have pure o and hypochondria too, so my head would keep spinning around potential diseases esp cancer and I'd stopped reading newspapers and articles bcz every other article having cancer written would make me panicky! And I'd be obsessed with thinking other superstitious thoughts related to it, like if I've read it, OMG I'm finding the word everywhere around that means I have it, I need a doc!!
Yeah same😍
How are you now? Did you cure?
This was hell growing up with. I had no idea what was wrong with me until late high school/college. I'm 24 now and have a much better handle on it. 24/7 of the thoughts were unbearable at times. Thanks for shedding light on this topic. Blessings!
My pure O seems to just latch on to anything distressing that I happen to be thinking. I'll spend the entire day obsessing about multiple different bad things, especially regarding my health. It's exhausting.
How are you now?
Saving this to send to people who, when I say I’ve been diagnosed, say “but your place isn’t always tidy” 🤦🏼♀️
Lol! I get it... we are all supposed to be "neat freaks"? It is just a stereotype & misconception that many people have of OCD. People think keeping an tidy desk at work or color coordinating socks in like OCD. lol If they only knew.......
Pure O is terrible and so scary, mine are philosophical instructive thoughts. I’ve Sally’s tumbled upon some philosophical videos and topics and I of course did more research out of fear which made it even worse. The thoughts come and stay for a while I’ve had one stay for almost 4 months until another came on. I luckily have great friends who have helped me through eh tough times and am so grateful I found videos about how to cope and how others have struggled. If you are dealing with these thoughts I’m sure reassurance hardly works but please know you ARE real and you WILL be okay and WILL overcome this.
Thank you. Stay strong brother. We can get thru this.
I love you and know you're not alone. This illness is a curse and so hard to live with, but we just gotta hold on. We can get through this.
Kati, I’ve been stressing bc I’ve been thinking I’m a narcissist for about 2 years. I have empathy, I have hurt people very close to me, like I was controlling to someone in my family at a young age and an old friend. I was also in some bad relationships and rn have insecurities. I am good at listening and I’m good at empathizing. I just over think and obsess over small things and beat myself up when I think I’m being selfish. I’ll neglect myself just to help ppl sometimes bc I think helping me is slfish. That’s another thing is when I act as a therapist to people, they usually seem to feel heard and understood and feel like I give them some pure useful advice. I’m just struggling bc I read all day about narcissism. Find what traits I can relate to and then start freaking out and thinking I’m a narcissist and will almost mimic the traits in my head. I once read narcissists think they’re perfect and I was always told by a close person when I was younger “you think your just so perfect sonny” and I’d feel like shit bc I don’t want to think that. So an intrusive thought I’ll have is “you think your perfect” and I’ll think “I’m not perfect” and I’ll get anxiety and think “I’m perfect” then “NO NO NO IM NOT PERFECT” then I’ll beat myself up bc I’m not being fair to others thinking that, and i think I’m really being dillusional about being perfect when really the dellusion is what I think I believe........ FUCK that was a lot for you to read if you read this
expose yourself to the situations which fears you of, stay there and don't do anything, don't even judge, don't even ruminate.. feel the fear... do this for few times and over the time u feel it is just an unwanted thought... this is how I cured.. I had an intrusive thought of jumping off the building and fear of loosing mind.. for over 6 months.. this is how I cleared
I'm seeking help for this. I'm scared shitless. But my best friend convinced me to go to a psychiatrist and seek help. I'm going to do this before it's too late...
i feel the same and have to do that too
How are you now?
@@chelzyramirez3663 well, I'm doing better! I realized I was fixating on different disorders to try and establish my identity. So, I don't have OCD, but I'm trying to get help. It's still a struggle, I'm trying to see a psychiatrist without having to spend hundreds of dollars. But eventually I'll get there! Thanks for asking
Woo, great to see this video! I also raise awareness for OCD on my channel - and keen to see other people do the same. I can also recommend Kat from Shalom Aleichem as a channel with loads of resources on Pure O. :)
The term "Pure O" is a fallacy though, they do have compulsions (I hate it when people call it Pure O, because the compulsions are mental and can be treated in the same way..)
I can’t even leave the house anymore without getting scared my intrusive thoughts get triggered.
Has anyone had an experience with intrusive thoughts where you start to speak them out loud when you don't want too?
Yess!! I try so hard to suppress them and not blurt them outloud. It's so distressing. I'm doing intense research to find out why i have such an urge to say them outloud.
No but, that would be hell!
Seems like tourettes?
I knew I was struggling with this for a while now, but this video really "set me free" in a sense. I am regularly seeing a therapist but she doesn't seem that knowledgeable about pure O in particular, and I now feel the courage start telling her about it and explain it to her. Really the worst thing is that the more you try to deny it, the worse it becomes. It's just pure hell. Just ... thanks Kati.
Pure O can be a real bitch to root out, because there's nothing you can do to break the compulsion physically, you have to break the chain of thinking, and describing horrifying or embarrassing stuff to a therapist can be really difficult. And the obsessions are often dug in deep and use all the mind's own resources to try and stop...the mind!...from healing itself. But it can be done.
This is the most enlightening thing I have seen. My entire life I have had this "fear" or "urge" to throw myself out of moving cars. Just what if I would unbuckle my belt and open the door on the highway? WHY? WHY WOULD I DO THAT? It scares the hell out of me. Or in the shower...what if I pushed my razor down on my leg and scraped my skin off? I am not a self harmer. I don't want to hurt myself. But my brain has these horrible intrusive thoughts ALL THE TIME. It usually isn't directed at other people, but they are SO SCARY.
And now this. THIS VIDEO. I was planning on looking for a new therapist after we moved in a few weeks bc my depression and anxiety are getting bad again, and I will definitely be showing him/her this. THANK YOU.
i think i probably just watched a video with the potential to change my life. ive been im treatment trying to deal with anxiety panic disorder self harm depression etc for 8 years and little to none improvement because I still have these "intrusive thoughts" all the fucking time and nothing makes them go away. for the past months I've been reading about ocd and thinking that could be it but I don't have compulsions so it didn't quite fit. the thing is, I never brought up this obsessive thoughts in therapy or to my doctor cause they are extremely grafic embarrassing chocking and weird and I don't feel ready to talk about them. maybe the time has come. I have never heard about pure o in my life (I'm from Brazil, maybe this is not well know around here? I had five therapists and six psychiatrists in the last 8 years and nobody mentioned it) but I'll certainly keep looking into researches and stuff like this and eventually talk about it in therapy. thank you, kati, I thank you profusely. keep spreading knowledge!!
Hey guys, I once thought I was suffering with pure O, I felt unable to do anything, was constantly worried by these thoughts, but then guess what? My confusion finally came to an end, the only problem I really had was diagnosing myself with pure O, I labelled myself as having pure O, and everyday I would have the urge to think delusional thoughts. I will give you the solution, the solution is DONT LOOK FOR A SOLUTION, you are trying to solve something that doesnt exist, hence creating the problem yourself, I wish I could go back and tell myself this wheb I was google searching solutions for hours, our brains are very powerful, we have to fight urges in everyday life such as urges to smoke, urges to spend money etc, similiar to this scenario you have formed the urge in your head to think delusional thoughts, seperate the thoughts in your head with actual thoughts & urgeful thoughts, and when you have them recognise them & understand you have the urge to think these thoughts and they dont mean anything, also clear your life of any unnesecary stresses and i would recommend a strong belief in God, I have a strong belief in Allah, and that is what keeps me so confident and strong, but anyway hope my comment helps, I got through this & so will you
never feel embarrassed..i have had terrible thoughts that i am still dealing with.
Louise Miles thank you for the support. i hope you're OK ❤
the thing that helped me the most with my pure o is the Buddhist practice of mindful awareness. you are not your thoughts. you are not your emotions. you are not your images. you are the observer of your thoughts, emotions and images. keep an open mind. mindful awareness. it will change you, but time takes time.
It is absolutely fine to have graphic, embarrassing, shocking thoughts. Everyone has them once in a while. Random thoughts are part of the human existence.
If you keep holding on to your intrusive thoughts and trying to scrutinize them and make them go away, they'll only grow stronger.
You have to just allow your mind to flow. Learn to shrug, learn to laugh at your most absurd thoughts.
Violent thoughts; sexual thoughts; disgusting thoughts. We all have them. It's human.
We all think mental health should be destigmatize but we all struggle to talk about our own issues. This is my experience: I initially had regular ocd, it's always been very secret for me, noone would notice unless I told them. Lately it got almost pure O, my ruminations got worse and worse. It's terrible, sometimes I think I can't get through this, that there's no way out and that my life will never be normal/happy. If you're going through the same thing please seek help and don't be ashamed of yourself for who you are. You are not alone.
Jesus. I always wondered why I got these types of thoughts. There’s OCD in my family and they have different compulsions from what I suffer from. I thought I was just fucked up in the head. Thank you so much, this brings me a bit more peace.
There can definitely also be physical compulsions too, some of those are checking and that might be checking what you emotionally feel and evaluating if that is bad, checking the body for a physical response because pure o can come with a physical response and reassurance seeking. ERP and meds can both help.
Great meeting you at Playlist, Kati!
OCD is just a 3 letter word for fear. And guess what FEAR can be overcome 💪🏻
Thank you for making this! I've dealt with this type of OCD in the past. In my own experience, I've found that the book 'Brain Lock' by Jeffrey Schwartz really helped me learn how to break the cognitive cycle that fuels the obsession. Despite the name 'Pure O,' it's important to identify the cognitive compulsions and to work on eliminating them. Examples include obsessively seeking reassurance, mental checks, going out of your way to prevent yourself from acting on impulse, etc. The more you do these, the worse the obsessions get! A good mantra to remember is that thoughts are not reality.
My experience is a fear that I may have schizophrenia, and I Google about it and it doesnt help at all and just makes things worse.
Same. I feel like I’m going psychotic and I googled the symptoms and it made me extremely paranoid thinking that I may have it.😔
Oh my god this is me to a tee. From waking up, I get intrusive thoughts rushing in “what if you’ve got psychosis, what if you go crazy” and then it’s almost like I start to convince myself that I have!! Haha, I start to feel paranoid and checking rooms , just to get annoyed at myself for doing these things as they just make me think even more that I am schizophrenic😭 Honestly, these are just thoughts and they do not need reassurance or a response. Try the book/audiobook “Overcoming unwanted intrusive thoughts” it has helped me so far, I’m going to continue the practices and hope for the best ❤️ lotta love you you
Thank you @KatiMorton for explaining Pure O! As a sufferer, I had a therapist who did not know how to help me with my sexually violent thoughts. That was 5 yrs ago. Now I have a great therapist who understands me:) My question to you: Why aren't some therapists knowledgeable about this subtype of OCD?
it's good to know that this is a real thing, because typically when OCD is talked about in informative videos and classes, they really do emphasize the necessity of the presence of compulsions; the problem is that for people who don't have those compulsions, it can cause doubt as to whether there's a real clinical disorder there (at least, that's kinda how _i_ thought)
Wow I just self diagnosed myself and I’ve never had anything describe my thoughts more accurately in my life. I’m gonna start therapy ASAP
Thank you for doing this! I tell people I have the obsessive and intrusive thoughts that are part of OCD but no one thinks that it could be a real thing. Finally I can show them this incredible video!
I was diagnosed with pure O OCD which is pretty stressful, but hey, once you're diagnosed treatment can begin
How r u
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!!
(CBT therapy can make any OCD worse. Look for a therapist that specializes in “exposure response therapy”. If they aren’t trained in this, don’t waste your time.
Finding this video saved my life. I thought I was crazy and a bad person until I realized that I have this, thank you 💖
I feel like this is me. But I’m too afraid to say how bad my thoughts are because they are so graphic. Whenever I get these thoughts I try to pray so I can “balance” out the bad thought or stop it. It doesn’t work usually. The thought just gets worse.
I’ve never been diagnosed but I feel like I have OCD.
I also stress out about events that I know never occurred. Like “what if I just told that lady she is ugly and fat”. Even though I know I didn’t say that I stress about it.
Erica dude, I'm right there with you. I'm sorry you're having a tough time with it. I've done that before too, the praying thing for it. I also get the doubt of 'did I just do /say that? No, right? I don't know I don't think so? You're definitely not alone!
i have it too, what i find works best is to take the power away from the thought. this is done by not reacting to it. what i say to myself is 'let it go in through one ear and out the other'. you will get better, especially if you start meditation
Same. I’m also afraid to say I might have this and describe it but it sounds so familiar. I just hate to self-diagnose. I’m going to show this to my therapist and psychiatrist and discuss it with them.
Lisa-Michelle Morgan that's a good idea! And honestly, I was super nervous to say something too but honestly what makes me feel better is that it's not stuff that'll phase them :) even as disturbing as it is. It's also super relieving to tell someone
Look up Nathan Peterson on UA-cam. He specializes in all types of OCD… He’s the best!!!!
(CBT therapy can make any OCD worse. Look for a therapist that specializes in “exposure response therapy”. If they aren’t trained in this, don’t waste your time.
I've struggled to explain this to so many people. Thank you, I've been dealing with this since I was a kid and have never had the words to properly define what was going on in my head.
same here..
For me personally Pure OCD feels like you are in court everyday you are the prosecuter, the lawyer on both sides, you are the jury, the judge, the audience, and your own witness. It feels like everyday I need to battle myself in court and argue "evidence"(thoughts memories sometimes false memories) as to why I am not a rapist, a murderer, a pedophile, and so on.. Memories are the worst because since you can not remeber specifically every detail it is so easy for your mind to change the memory I always use this example when I try to explain this (I hope it makes sense)🙏. "You are an adult 20s or so and you get a memory, you remeber you went to the park when you were 6 and you were playing and suddenly saw a butterfly. You go and grab the butterfly but at the early age of 6 you didn't know that if you touch a butterfly to hard it could die , this memory suddenly comes to you and a voice inside your head (the OCD) says "oh YOU killed that butterfly" "YOU wanted to" "YOU probably liked it" "Are YOU sure YOUR not a murder" "what if that was an early sighn you are messed up" " end of story. So in conclusion at some point you can't even trust your memories you will now forever remeber and organize that memory as "evidence" that you are a "BAD PERSON". Now for the reality you are not you didnt know you were 6 for crying out loud there alot of memories, actions, and things that people do by accident. Sometimes the way you grew up what you knew what you didn't know. What I learned is present you can not judge past you. YOU ARE NOT THE SAME PERSON YOU WERE LAST YEAR LAST MONTH LAST WEEK EVEN. Everyday you learn something new maybe you didn't know something was wrong that ok well now you do. Thats it. Thats were one should stop. But....its not that easy you have to keep reminding yourself everything a new piece of "evidence" shows up of what logic lies behind it. The shame guilt and PANIC behind every thought is real it really truly does feel like you did something horrible unspeakable. When in reality it is the furthest thing you could possibly do. For me it feels like OCD or Pure OCD is just a different version of a phobia. It takes what you consider to be the worst person on this planet (aka a murder, pedo, rapist...) and then you become so scared to become them that you start to look for any signs in memories thoughts actions that could indicate you might be this horrible person. The thought I consistently get is "what is I am a horrible human being and I just don't know it?" I know it makes no sense its just a fear I have and I become obsessed with looking to see if I can find any evidence to back up that fear. Its a horrible court game played every day. When in reality I actually wouldn't hurt a fly. I think for me personally it stems from the want to always be perfect and to always be a goody tooshoes. I think maybe for me personally I am so afraid of doing anything bad or making a mistake that now I am just looking for things to punish myself for not being perfect all the time. I actually love children and was a tutor for a long time i have always been great with children so for me doing any harm to them would be my worst fear😰. I know I would never in a million years do ANYTHING. Yet I can not help but be scared and torment myself. Anyway that was a long rant I am sorry. Please be kind to others because sometimes I just want to roll up into
little ball.
It's exactly it for me...
It's exactly it for me...
I have one small comment Kati. ERP is definitely necessary for Pure O, just as necessary as for OCD with physical compulsions. I'd argue ERP is more effective than CBT for OCD, all types of OCD.
In my experience alone, ERP helped my Pure O tremendously, in conjunction with CBT. But CBT alone does not help Pure O as much as CBT with ERP.
Pure O is really the same thing as OCD with physical compulsions, and needs the same treatment. Pure O may be harder to treat to therapists without experience with it, but with a therapist experienced with Pure O can treat it effectively with ERP. It's about finding those mental compulsions and refraining from those, since people with Pure O DO have compulsions, they're just internal.
Other than that, thank you for talking about such an important topic! :)
I have pure o. Does anyone else see "floaters" and have a ringing in their ears every now and then?
Boston Schroeder yep
Yes!!
Yes!!!
I think everyone does.
Oh I was just having the ringing in my ear just now hahaha
OCD is literally hell, i feel like i have sepreate sides of my brain and they battle all the time
It is surely an internal battle between the rational & irrational parts of the same brain. The judge, jury and accused all in the same mind.
I was having intrusive thoughts as young as elementary school, it's literal hell. I'm so glad I learned about this!
Thank you, watching this video and reading the comments makes me feel better. I was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago, and I’m 23. Before I was diagnosed I felt so shitty about myself. I used to combat the horrible sexual thoughts with extremely violent ones when I was younger because it numbed me for the moment. I am on SSRIs right now, but I find I need to watch these videos once in awhile because it’s so hard to explain to people that I’m suffering when there is little to no physical evidence, like compulsions. To everyone out there - remember that your suffering is real, and that you don’t need to justify it.
These videos and the comments sections makes me feel better as well. Honestly, it is comforting to know that there are people out there that can relate to what you are experiencing. Just imagine I was first diagnosed with OCD about 30 years ago. This was before the internet and I always felt rather alone in this condition. I confided in my dad about it and his advice was "Be a man, suck it up and push forward". Yeah... not very helpful, huh? I don't blame him really, nobody knew about OCD then.
I thought this was a normal way of thinking like my whole life..... glad to know I'm not the only one dealing with this.
2:57
man, it's crazy having a problem for years, and then years later, finding out that there is a very reliable clinical diagnosis which seems to fit the kinds of things you were going through at the time. to put it more concisely, it's crazy finding out that some hardship you've been going through is a "thing", and that there's a _word_ for it; a term
I’ve begun the process of writing a book on my experience with Pure O. It’ll likely be called “Oh god, I think I might be gay!” My intrusive thoughts are based unfortunately in pretty violent thoughts as well as the frequent fear that I may be gay when I know I’m not sexually attracted to men. I’d love to collaborate with you on the book, Kati! Perhaps quite you on occasion throughout the book!
Thank you Kati. I have Pure OCD since 12-13 years old (now 43) and I haven't managed to get over it. It caused me chronic anxiety which led me to chronic depression (along with other factors like hypersensitive personality). SSRI's never worked for me for OCD only for anxiety-depression-social phobia. Sometimes I am successfully avoid to follow the thoughts and images but then it come back strong and feel so exhausted and helpless. I have done interpersonal therapy but never CBT or ERP and I want to try it. Keep fighting to all of you who struggle with this problem.
Wow, my respect for surviving this shit for so long !
I relate to a lot of this. I probably don’t even have pure o but, since April, I had terrible sexual thoughts and I hated myself for it and even thought if suicide. It sort of calmed down but, I still get intrusive thoughts from time to time and recently, I’ve always found myself thinking about near death situations that have a 5% chance of happening and start to panic for one second before calming myself down and realizing none of the thoughts are real, get thoughts about my loved ones dying or me accidentally killing them. I’m not really ashamed of the thoughts about death but, I’m more ashamed about the sexual intrusive thoughts. I might talk to my school therapist tomorrow though.
i'm so glad i found this video i thought there was something really really wrong with me...
I assume you haven't been diagnosed if you didnt know. But I think I'm in the same boat. Get constant thoughts that are just horrible. Eberytime I try fall asleep or relax the images keep coming into my mind
I have been regularly sitting for hours trying to fix things in my head, trying to obtain some sort of mental closure each time a new realisation comes into my head. Is this a strong sign of OCD?
What do you mean by new realization?
I'm such a worrier when I realise I have ocd pure o. my past mistakes make me feel so negative and I want to be positive. I'm married to an amazing woman who comforts me and has always helped me. my mind sometimes deceives me and makes me feel terrible. my dad passed away last week and everytime I see my dad's picture of him smiling, I have to look again and again as my brain makes me feel like is he really smiling? was he disappointed in me ever? will I stay strong and get through this. and I always tell myself ofcourse he's smiling ☺. he always smiled and spent about of time with his family. I love him and always will. thank you soo much for your videos as u really inspire me to be myself and keep strong. thank you everyone who also understands me and hope you all have a great day. x
I’ve never heard of this and been following you for a long time. My psych told me she suspects OCD. I didn’t understand so I started digging for internal OCD. This was the first video that came up. Thanks again Kati. I kind of wish this had a different name because OCD research is dominated by the compulsive side of things and it just presents so differently like cptsd and ptsd
Omg I wish I had known this information when I started struggling with OCD (Pure O) at age 13. I also struggled with anxiety and depression (of course) until 18, when I started taking an SSRI and the OCD went away and depression lessened. Much later, at 33, I found out the "root" of all of it was actually undiagnosed ADHD. Thanks for your videos- i would love to see more on ADHD in women/adults. 💕
Jesus, I just thought I was becoming a monster, I just need therapy and medicine 🤣 thank you so much
I’ve had the POCD subtype for a while… intrusive thoughts about children, constantly thinking I’m a child predator in the making, going out of my way to avoid kids or refusing to watch anything that has a kid in it….
I have had these thoughts for years, It's highly distressing but you learn to live with it. It's incredibly interesting to watch this video though, It's nice to know there is a diagnosis for this. I was always told they were just 'intrusive thoughts'. Every time I have one I have to tell myself it's an 'intrusive thought' and it helps it go away. I don't know if this is normal but they tend to stay the same for a while then I'll get a new one? It sounds ridiculous but I struggle to hold a hot drink around people out of fear I'll chuck it in their face. I then have to abandon my hot drink because of the worry i'll lob it over someone. (I have many different 'thoughts' and it's embarrassing to share them because some of them are so horrific but It's reassuring to know other people have them too.)
I thank God I find this channel feel less a lot alone now I understand pure OCD is heĺl I find solice AND peace in JESUS
Yay! I've been looking forward to you making a video on intrusive thoughts for a while. Thank you for making it so easy to understand and follow as always. 💛
You are not your thoughts, but the one who governs them
Actually, I believe ERP has in recent years surpassed CBT and has proven itself to be the most effective treatment for this condition. ACT seems to be used quite often as an adjunct to ERP.
You look so beautiful and I love your hair so much 😍
Love your hair here it frames your face nicely
Stay strong guys ❤
You look gorgeous in this video, no offence to how you normally look in your other videos.
I suffer from schizophrenia but find myself with this type of mindset many times as it seems to kick in as a self defense mechanism especially when outdoors. I noticed one way to make the conflicting positive thoughts win out over the negative ones is by looking at people's faces directly which helps me to snap out of the negative fantasy thinking as i all of sudden see them as people and tell myself that was some foolish negative thinking.
Thanks for the always excellent videos Kati Morton :D
I can honestly say this disorder has ruined my life 🤷🏾♀️
Mine too how are u now
I Feel this :( how are you doing now??? Wish all of us could have a support group together . It’s so lonely
@@adelinasardothien8238 hi, honestly same. These thoughts are so disturbing
I have been having thoughts like this and it's been making me worry about myself. I never thought I was a bad person but I have always had intrusive suicidal thoughts (I'm not suicidal) along with thoughts of hurting other people. When I was young I had the thought "Im going to jump out of the car right now" and I didn't have the reasoning skills at the time to know opening a car door on highway 19 is bad. Thank God for seat belts and booster seats.
Because my thoughts have been becoming more disruptive in my life, I made an appointment and have been doing research on OCD because I also do things like rewriting pages and pages of things I written because I don't like how it looks and it'll cause we stress and anxiety to just leave it.
I'm going to definitely bring this up in my appointment. Thanks for making this video. It's helped me.
I suffered with this my whole life along with general anxiety and depression. They’re all beasts. Ugh. It’s funny for so long I thought I just had obsessions but then I realized that I have a ton of mental compulsions too. My OCD is almost entirely about perfectionism with myself and my experiences. I obsess about interactions with people, stressful things at work, if some part of my body isn’t perfect. It’s awful. I’ve been off meds for 5 years, have many coping mechanisms and therapy has helped a lot but it’s hard. It’s also hard for me to do ERP because of these hArder to see mental compulsions. I wish OCD specialists were covered in my insurance plan but they’re not so I can’t see an ERP specialist. 😭
you just described the EXACT way ive been feeling the last two weeks. the ontario covid lockdown got extended to 6 weeks and it triggered a lot of anxiety that led to intrusive thoughts. i convinced myself i was going insane and labelled myself every mental illness in the dsm until i found this. I'm currently waiting to see the doctor this week and hopefully get a referral to a psychiatrist too. my mom has ocpd but i resonate so much with pure o OCD. i feel so much better knowing im not insane and that there is hope. im looking forward to doing CT and getting medicated. THANK YOU SO MUCH
I have pure o but i'm so embarrassed to talk to my psychologist about them that I don't go to therapy anymore for it.
Angy G I just had a consultation over the phone to begin my treatment, it's more common than you think and there are people that can help you find the tools to deal with this. You are not alone.
Angy G don't let pure o win you deserve happiness
i`m also scared. Having that problem for 14 but i`ve never told anyone without family. I`m so shy
Thanks for this...it definitely helps create conciousness around the realities of what it really means to struggle with OCD. The more we speak about it the better others around us can be educated.
Ummm I know this may sound a little under-rated but... when it comes to intrusive/ obsessive thoughts, the best way I console myself is by reminding myself what Albus Dumbledore told Harry Potter in the first book when he was feeling anxious about the Sorting Hat telling him he could do well in Slytherin because he had Voldemort-induced powers such as the ability to speak in Parsel tongue etc etc. He said "it is not our abilities that define us. it's our choices that makes us different from others." i'd rephrase that and be like it's not our unintentional thoughts or abilities that define us. it's our choices and actions that defines us. my therapist told me thought is not equal to action. so doesnt matter how messed up the thought is, it's not reality. i know it's easier said than done. when those intrusive thoughts plague you, it get's very nauseating and stifling.
Wow, okay, you described some of my thoughts exactly. I thought everyone had those kind of intrusive thoughts followed by the spiral of "what does this say about me" but it sounds like that might be pure O?
i've been struggling with this for so long i forgot how to feel normal
literally me too, I’m sorry I know this was 4 years ago. But I hope you’re doing a lot better.
For me , I think it’s more of a anxiety disorder. I have had some of the worst instructive thoughts imaginable which cause severe depression and anxiety. It started when I was young and it gave me a severe anxiety attack. My psychiatrist says everyone has these thoughts. The problem with OCD is the anxiety makes people linger on these thoughts. The unknown and the what if is actually at play here. I actually call Pure O” the “what if” disease because that is what it is.
Exactly! What if a mole or spot is cancer? What if I ran over a pedestrian while driving? What if I were to snap and throw a baby off a balcony at a family gathering? These are typical thoughts which plague pure O & OCD sufferers night and day. Speaking of the unknown a fellow sufferer I met who claims to have recovered from OCD offered this advice: The key is to learn to accept and even embrace the unknown and to not do rituals if that is a coping mechanism. The rituals keep you in a perpetual OCD hamster wheel. Meaning, they bring instant relief, which is short lived, as you are stuck in a vicious cycle. An example would be an individual with health related OCD & anxiety, who's preoccupation is cancer. They typically spend enormous amounts of time every day checking their bodies for signs of cancer. Skin, mouth, armpits etc.. Also, comparing 'symptoms' or a anything vaguely suspicious with pics & info they have gathered online. The sufferer has to say to themselves "I just might have cancer". Learn to live with the uncertainty of it all and stop the rituals. Over time the OCD lessens and in best case scenario disappears, but the sufferer needs to stay ever vigilant. Thanks for mentioning this! You never know how casual statements you make may help others.
@@finn3102 Yea but, Try having this curse (that’s what I also call it), but your dream is to be a pilot. It really sucks to have this disease. For those of you who don’t know, in order to be a pilot (I’ve flown a plane in flight school and love aviation and studying it) you need to be medically certified before you can get your license. And I kept putting it off but I quit school and I know I wouldn’t get my medical because no matter how calm ( when I’m in the plane all my worries go away, I’m so focused on flying) I am in the plane it wouldn’t matter. It really does suck to have this curse. It feels like a demon that ruins your life. I’m on anti depressants and anti anxiety meds and I quit because I knew I would never get my first class medical.
I read an article was written by a person who has Pure O and they wrote that cognitive restructuring therapy doesn't work because it is supposed to rationalize that those intrusive thoughts aren't true but the analysis of the intrusive thoughts can make them more deeply entrenched. It may depend on the person, but according to the article ERP is the best treatment. This is the link to the article if anyone wants more details on this: www.theguardian.com/society/2013/aug/31/pure-ocd-the-naked-truth
Again this may vary from person to person, but this is what I have found from a bit of research that I have done. To put things into context, I am certain I have Pure O and only found out this recently. I have never been to therapy for it but I have tried to rationalize on my own knowing that my thoughts were wildly untrue but yet part of me still had self doubt that I could just be a psychopath as well as being no help to stop the intrusive thoughts from rushing in. So from my experience trying to rid this thoughts myself, analysis and rationalization did not help.
How are you now?
@@chelzyramirez3663 I can't say I've overcome Pure O, because though my intrusive thoughts are less frequent they are still something I have to deal with. But my intrusive thoughts are much more manageable now that I know it is Pure O. Before I had learned that my intrusive thoughts were caused by Pure O, a mental illness, I thought I was a terrible person who chose to think these thoughts. Finding out that I had Pure O gave me a sense of relief. Since writing this comment I have gone to therapy, began consistently practicing mindfulness, and have been more open to talking about my experience with this type of OCD. Although I may never truly "overcome" Pure O, I can more easily let these thoughts go and pay them less mind. I am in a much better headspace now than I have ever been and I get to continue my journey of self growth.
I personally love ACT therapy. It became helpful when I got to a point in my CBT work where I was getting frustrated over having the anxious thought in the first place. CBT helped me recognize if/ how the thought was distorted but that never seemed to fully help.
ACT is great for thought-related issues! I casually got into it because the therapist I was talking to was using the method, and it makes so much sense. It´s also very practical in a way, you need to learn to accept your thoughts and don´t be negatively influenced by them. ALso not to get lost in your mind but go back to reality, so you can move on with your life and just accept those thoughts without engaging. Slowly those thoughts will be less present and less disturbing...it´s a whole process but is worth it and helps with other issues too
I just talked to my councillor about this and I didn't even know that this was a diagnosis
Thanks for this video!
Same, I actually thought this was the normal way of thinking.
Wow... so this is what has been torturing me all my life. Very informative, thank you. 💌
This is so interesting! I had nevee known about pure "O" OCD. Thank you for the information!
*never
What’s your Snapchat ur rlly cute
I deal with this sometimes...I get really bad intrusive thoughts such as jumping off of buildings...even though I DONT want to and I DONT feel suicidal. It’s like this extremely intense fear. I know what is happening when I have these intrusive thoughts so every time I tell myself it is my ocd and eventually it goes away. I’m lucky to avoid a panic attack after one though!!! So important for anyone dealing with intrusive thoughts to be knowledgeable about the symptoms of OCD!