The core problem with PUA behavior is that it's an act, not genuine behavior. You can't put on an act all day every day or you'll drive yourself insane.
I think it might depend, if its a very small and insignificant thing you might be able to and might even ”fake it until you make it” but this does not apply for core personality traits like going from ”crying alone in the corner of your room while reading a book” to ”doing drugs on the park bench with 80 of your closest friends” tho its generally a bad idea from what I know
Here's an interesting thing that I realised lately - I found that the women that I felt most attracted to and wanted to see again were not the most beautiful ones but the ones that I thought were smart and interesting as well as beautiful. I also found that I could really get turned off by even the most beautiful women if I didn't like how they behaved.
YES! Absolutely, and then you get a whole raft of insecure PUA guys saying that it's all about how many women you shag and how hot they are and they're completely missing the point.
I've had the pleasure of meeting at least a few of these women you describe as high quality since starting my journey a little over a year ago. There's still a very long way to go but it truly has been eye opening so far.
No one tells women that their lies, manipulative behavior, and all the fake things they do to look attractive is wrong. So don't tell men all the fake things they do in response to it is bad.
Seduction techniques are very helpful, like any other tool it depends on how you use them and what you use them for. The PUA techniques I learned have nothing to do with lying.
I feel I met a PUA guy lately - he played sweet and honest but then contradicted himself overnite, tried to humiliate and be judgmental to me on every minor thing - seems this is his way to reinforce his self-esteem and ego. Those attack words were from nowhere and I wish I never met him
Sorry to hear that - PUA normally would be the opposite - he'd attack your self esteem earlier not later - Unfortunately some insecure men just act like douchebags in general :/
I really love your content. It's some of the best i've found pertaining to becoming a more attractive guy. I hope your following grows. Your approach (correct me if im wrong) is centered around honestly, integrity, and being your best self. I believe that really is the best foundation for "pickup" and will bring the most fulfillment in the end.
I'm an average dude. Although the PUA/Game stuff is interesting, it's not for me. It seems to attract low-confidence guys. But the people with low confidence rarely gain confidence. Instead, they learn how to mimic confident people. Also, having your self-esteem be dependent on female attention is pretty sad. I've known lots of dudes who were obsessed with getting dates because they really had low self-confidence and self-esteem ... and they sought to validate their worth by getting dates. I've always genuinely felt sorry for them. I don't know how guys can truly feel good about themselves by manipulating women into dates/sex. It seems very soul-crushing.
You must talk to TRPs, to those good men who have lost their ways, insecure, playing games., being angry all the time... The cult doesn´t let them believe women, maybe they listen you.
@@SchoolOfAttraction Bit old video but... you can't help but come across these people as you start this journey. Some of what they say made sense but in the back of my head I was always knew. I was unsuccessful with women, but no women has ever treated me bad. There is something I'm doing wrong, it's not them. Being yourself, being able to be vulnerable with women and still or because of it be successful with women just builds your confidence it's just a big snowball.... such a big burden of my shoulders, thank you for your work and everyone like you that realize women are the greatest thing ever and you can treat them well and they will love you.
I read the Game and looked into other pua material as well and it helped my confidence and ability to talk to women but it was a short term game. I was never looking for a short term hookup and I found I couldn't be genuine. I would have these very attractive girls eating out of my hand, deeply engaged in my conversation and presence but I always felt it was a facade that I kept trying to maintain the game. It's great if you just are looking to hook up or just to flirt which is what I use it for mostly now but something serious I don't know.
As a general rule of thumb, women only dig you if you look like Henry Cavill. Of course this doesn't apply to them all, but we're painfully aware that it's the general consensus.
I agree with what you say in general about being manipulative but i dont think thats fundemental to PUA. Its just an application of the tactics that id optional. The OGs of pickup like Jeff Ross or Mystery use specific tactics for a specific purpose (to get a high body count with bar bimbos) but thats just one route you can take. You dont have to copy them to that extent. Just know the basic principles involved in attraction. Thats what PUA is all about: intriguing someone, creating attraction and building raport, and closing. That formula can be applied in an honest and good-intentioned manner.
Thanks for making this video! I have always felt uncomfortable following advice from other "pua" coaches because their mentality is so regressive. As you said, It's all about how many women you can sleep with. These guys don't actually like women. all they care about is her pussy ...for a few minutes. And once they get that, they move on to the next one. I've had a couple of one night stands and they pale in comparision with sex I've had in relatioships because it is sooo much better. I don't know why mediocre, forgettable sex with 50 women is considered better than amazing sex with the 1 woman. Quality >>>>> quantity always
Just a word of advice, reconsidering this misogynistic mindset will increase the quality of your interactions with women. They are repulsed by your need to channel your insecurities into sleeping with as many people you can. A better way to approach this is to learn how to have genuine interactions, confidently but without the creepy undertone of wanting to sleep with the woman you are talking to. Because otherwise, this message you are putting out to other men is sad. It will lead them into depressive holes where they'll experience harsher rejection by woman and internalize it more as they are putting too much value on how many 'numbers' they can get as if it's commission. This isn't good for anyone, men or women.
One of the great contributions of the original PUA community was encouraging men to step slightly out of the socially/politically correct boundaries. In common late "manosphere" parlance to become "red pilled". This is especially important for men in the English speaking world. Was the result perfect? No, far from it. But what is? Would you encounter men obsessed with "lay counts" and the like? Yes. But that is preferable to the recent trend of presenting a watered down, "tamed" but politically correct solution to the problem that has occupied men's minds since the dawn of time.
SchoolOfAttraction Being genuine and honest is not only about sex. It applies to everything. Normally we learn it through family, school, through the childhood. I'm surprised that people constantly don't get this.
I’m a bit surprised too, but if think of it, men often have to pretend someone they are not when they were little kids, some parents like to forbid them to be cry (no emotional freedom), require them to be strong (can’t show vulnerability), to be sporty, some things like that. The process of them growing up in order to become a man (as what society expected), was built on not being genuine about their emotions and not being honest when their actions that wasn’t expected from their parents. Let say the boy likes to play with dolls but his parents think that’s not masculine, scold him for that, so he lied about it everytime he plays with dolls. This might have affected their ability to actually know how relationships work.
Im not interested in these pua stuff but I can say if you love yourself deeply woman will find you much more attractive !so just use AFFIRMATION I love myself over and over I guarantee you will like the results after a few months !
“Sex with a woman who you don’t click with is like 6 or 7 out of 10” Go through dry spells and get turned down by women who are interested in men who are married to other women, and tell me that shit. It must be lonely at the top 🙄
Hey Damien. I live in Sydney and was wondering where you went to meet these high quality women? Like were there specific places or was it just general places in public like parks and shops?
It's interesting Tyler has some good stuff to say - RSD on the whole through tends to have a 'narcissism' mentality that's very unhealthy - But I don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater and suggest everything they say is rubbish because it's not. However there's a core philosophy that both attracts and creates deeply troubled men.
@@SchoolOfAttraction Yeah i agree. He also gives us a good insight into female psychology and how women select mates.he talks about Long term mating strategy vs Short term mating strategy for men. How to build yourself from inside by doing the tough and not so comfortable things so that you don't Have to necessarily fake the Alpha traits. But yeah there is always this element of Deception and Manipulation that will always bug you. But looking back this whole PUA thing help me keep women off the pedestal and gave a sense of social Freedom.
Well the thing about a shit test is to recognise what it is - it's either a) she's playing a game with you in which case you ignore it or b) She's seeing something incongruent in your behavior that she doesn't trust and so when you're being up-front and genuine you won't get.
It seems to me that you have gone short on the game. few months is not enough, and you stayed in the mechanical version of the pickup and conquest (Mystery method, which is instrumental). What you are finding now is the second part, which is about growing your real personality matching your own new morality with women. Then you start to reach the "floating stage", like when butterflies start in your body and you get this extra pleasure to interact with women. Nothing to do with checking boxes with an excel sheet.
IMO, PUA is very powerful. The PUA can see how powerful it is when using them. TBH, s3x is the most addictive thing, more than anything else, then I guess the PUA got hooked into the black hole A golden rule for a drug dealer is never used the drug, and casino mogul is never gamble Actually, the practitioners can be mastered by the PUA skills & mindset & lust of s3x, if not be careful The practitioners have to master them, to become a natural Even Paul Janka knows the player (he didn't believe in PUA) is an act, and he was an actor. The women fell into a fantasy Today, everyone knows PUA and PUA had a bad rep, all the girls know about PUA and their guard is up and more resistance. PUA is everywhere, and more competition and the PUA got more frustrated. The old PUA tactics may need to be updated,
Modern PUA mentality is 0% manipulative. Thing that mainstream pickup teach nowadays like RSD is Nothing like your describing. They put emphasis on congruence and taking action and the likes. Still, very informative video and your'e right pickup used to be quite manipulative in it's early days.
Actually RSD makes those CLAIMS yes - But if you've ever headed out with a group of RSD blokes or spent time in forums listening to advice from coaches - it's clear that this is extremely far from the case. RSD is one of the biggest culprits of teaching narcissistic, manipulative, emotionally unhealthy ethics to men.
SchoolOfAttraction well thx for bringing the whole issue up, I agree that the community hasnt caught up entirely with the congruence teachings of Owen. Still, RSD is definitely the most life changing influence i've had in my life haha, i'm prolly biased a tad bit
Are you trying ot argue that it's impossible to teach dating skills to people without being a pickup artist? Nevermind the fact I started the company because I hated pickup artist :/
I...understand your position and it's anecdotal at best. There are many men whose self esteem aren't based on how many lays they have. Who don't necessarily meet toxic women at every corner and lane turned upon. The picture you paint is idyllic; after your ''transformation'' (which good for you btw if it brings you a measure of dignity and peace) you met women who were wonderful...no toxic ones...at all...Hard to believe statistically. It seems as if, from your revelation, you've painted your new found experiences in a new found light, a thing people should be critical of, myself included. I agree, to a degree, with your message however deception and manipulations have been employed throughout human history and well to be frank, not all of us feel bad doing so. (shrugs) Nice video though. As much as I disagree with you on many a topic, I do find your presentation of your view fascinating and well put-together, so to speak.
The core problem with PUA behavior is that it's an act, not genuine behavior. You can't put on an act all day every day or you'll drive yourself insane.
Absolutely! And women will eventually see the act and get away from you.
you fake it until it becomes a part of your natural behavior.
fuck it man who cares if it gets you laid. jeez
A loud Italian Proud poor soul here
@@dagyoutube9325 or become psychotic for trying to be different personality type.
I think it might depend, if its a very small and insignificant thing you might be able to and might even ”fake it until you make it”
but this does not apply for core personality traits like going from ”crying alone in the corner of your room while reading a book” to ”doing drugs on the park bench with 80 of your closest friends”
tho its generally a bad idea from what I know
Here's an interesting thing that I realised lately - I found that the women that I felt most attracted to and wanted to see again were not the most beautiful ones but the ones that I thought were smart and interesting as well as beautiful. I also found that I could really get turned off by even the most beautiful women if I didn't like how they behaved.
YES! Absolutely, and then you get a whole raft of insecure PUA guys saying that it's all about how many women you shag and how hot they are and they're completely missing the point.
@@SchoolOfAttraction You are pua..! Semantic dodge...Nice try
a good "pua" understands what women really want and respond to and gives it to them by becoming that type of guy
Finally somebody who is getting the point. Well done.
Thanks Sledge!
I've had the pleasure of meeting at least a few of these women you describe as high quality since starting my journey a little over a year ago. There's still a very long way to go but it truly has been eye opening so far.
No one tells women that their lies, manipulative behavior, and all the fake things they do to look attractive is wrong. So don't tell men all the fake things they do in response to it is bad.
Actually I do - for a living! :P Constantly teaching women not to try to manipulate men in relationships. So ner ner ner :P
Seduction techniques are very helpful, like any other tool it depends on how you use them and what you use them for. The PUA techniques I learned have nothing to do with lying.
Great content! This video made me change my mindset towards game and women
Glad you're enjoying it!
I feel I met a PUA guy lately - he played sweet and honest but then contradicted himself overnite, tried to humiliate and be judgmental to me on every minor thing - seems this is his way to reinforce his self-esteem and ego. Those attack words were from nowhere and I wish I never met him
Sorry to hear that - PUA normally would be the opposite - he'd attack your self esteem earlier not later - Unfortunately some insecure men just act like douchebags in general :/
I really love your content. It's some of the best i've found pertaining to becoming a more attractive guy. I hope your following grows. Your approach (correct me if im wrong) is centered around honestly, integrity, and being your best self. I believe that really is the best foundation for "pickup" and will bring the most fulfillment in the end.
You honest, caring smile in the end made me hit the sub-button 😊
Thank you I'm pleased to hear it :)
I'm an average dude. Although the PUA/Game stuff is interesting, it's not for me. It seems to attract low-confidence guys. But the people with low confidence rarely gain confidence. Instead, they learn how to mimic confident people. Also, having your self-esteem be dependent on female attention is pretty sad. I've known lots of dudes who were obsessed with getting dates because they really had low self-confidence and self-esteem ... and they sought to validate their worth by getting dates. I've always genuinely felt sorry for them. I don't know how guys can truly feel good about themselves by manipulating women into dates/sex. It seems very soul-crushing.
The difficulty really is when they believe it's the ONLY way to be attractive to women - becuase that's how many of these guys feel... It's very sad.
This is so interesting, thanks for sharing!
You must talk to TRPs, to those good men who have lost their ways, insecure, playing games., being angry all the time... The cult doesn´t let them believe women, maybe they listen you.
I know! it's heart breaking, they're in so much pain, but they won't believe that women aren't the enermy :/
@@SchoolOfAttraction Bit old video but... you can't help but come across these people as you start this journey. Some of what they say made sense but in the back of my head I was always knew. I was unsuccessful with women, but no women has ever treated me bad. There is something I'm doing wrong, it's not them. Being yourself, being able to be vulnerable with women and still or because of it be successful with women just builds your confidence it's just a big snowball.... such a big burden of my shoulders, thank you for your work and everyone like you that realize women are the greatest thing ever and you can treat them well and they will love you.
Great video! Can you share some references/material about man's work? Highly appreciated!
Hey Rachid - I think I might do another video on it shortly actually - watch this space :)
Very insightful, I shall test this advice
I read the Game and looked into other pua material as well and it helped my confidence and ability to talk to women but it was a short term game. I was never looking for a short term hookup and I found I couldn't be genuine. I would have these very attractive girls eating out of my hand, deeply engaged in my conversation and presence but I always felt it was a facade that I kept trying to maintain the game. It's great if you just are looking to hook up or just to flirt which is what I use it for mostly now but something serious I don't know.
Then I suggest you models book
Great stuff......Thank's for posting!
As a general rule of thumb, women only dig you if you look like Henry Cavill. Of course this doesn't apply to them all, but we're painfully aware that it's the general consensus.
I agree with what you say in general about being manipulative but i dont think thats fundemental to PUA. Its just an application of the tactics that id optional. The OGs of pickup like Jeff Ross or Mystery use specific tactics for a specific purpose (to get a high body count with bar bimbos) but thats just one route you can take. You dont have to copy them to that extent. Just know the basic principles involved in attraction. Thats what PUA is all about: intriguing someone, creating attraction and building raport, and closing. That formula can be applied in an honest and good-intentioned manner.
To think that women are born with the privilege to enjoy dates, flirting and great conversations.
I like this subject so much, I thank you
Thanks for making this video! I have always felt uncomfortable following advice from other "pua" coaches because their mentality is so regressive. As you said, It's all about how many women you can sleep with. These guys don't actually like women. all they care about is her pussy ...for a few minutes. And once they get that, they move on to the next one. I've had a couple of one night stands and they pale in comparision with sex I've had in relatioships because it is sooo much better. I don't know why mediocre, forgettable sex with 50 women is considered better than amazing sex with the 1 woman. Quality >>>>> quantity always
can I share this video with china to remind girls to protect themselves?
Just a word of advice, reconsidering this misogynistic mindset will increase the quality of your interactions with women. They are repulsed by your need to channel your insecurities into sleeping with as many people you can. A better way to approach this is to learn how to have genuine interactions, confidently but without the creepy undertone of wanting to sleep with the woman you are talking to. Because otherwise, this message you are putting out to other men is sad. It will lead them into depressive holes where they'll experience harsher rejection by woman and internalize it more as they are putting too much value on how many 'numbers' they can get as if it's commission. This isn't good for anyone, men or women.
Thank u for it man
One of the great contributions of the original PUA community was encouraging men to step slightly out of the socially/politically correct boundaries. In common late "manosphere" parlance to become "red pilled". This is especially important for men in the English speaking world.
Was the result perfect? No, far from it. But what is? Would you encounter men obsessed with "lay counts" and the like? Yes.
But that is preferable to the recent trend of presenting a watered down, "tamed" but politically correct solution to the problem that has occupied men's minds since the dawn of time.
dangerous too in the me too era
You guys have to go through so many things to finally learn this?
Absolutely, where else would guys learn this?
SchoolOfAttraction Being genuine and honest is not only about sex. It applies to everything. Normally we learn it through family, school, through the childhood. I'm surprised that people constantly don't get this.
A lot of men are just another species that don’t hold common senses... they have to learn
I’m a bit surprised too, but if think of it, men often have to pretend someone they are not when they were little kids, some parents like to forbid them to be cry (no emotional freedom), require them to be strong (can’t show vulnerability), to be sporty, some things like that. The process of them growing up in order to become a man (as what society expected), was built on not being genuine about their emotions and not being honest when their actions that wasn’t expected from their parents. Let say the boy likes to play with dolls but his parents think that’s not masculine, scold him for that, so he lied about it everytime he plays with dolls.
This might have affected their ability to actually know how relationships work.
Im not interested in these pua stuff but I can say if you love yourself deeply woman will find you much more attractive !so just use AFFIRMATION I love myself over and over I guarantee you will like the results after a few months !
“Sex with a woman who you don’t click with is like 6 or 7 out of 10”
Go through dry spells and get turned down by women who are interested in men who are married to other women, and tell me that shit.
It must be lonely at the top 🙄
Hey Damien. I live in Sydney and was wondering where you went to meet these high quality women? Like were there specific places or was it just general places in public like parks and shops?
I met incredible women everywhere - Including regular night spots like Ivy, Argyle, Opera bar.
What do you think about RSD Tyler ideas?
It's interesting Tyler has some good stuff to say - RSD on the whole through tends to have a 'narcissism' mentality that's very unhealthy - But I don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater and suggest everything they say is rubbish because it's not. However there's a core philosophy that both attracts and creates deeply troubled men.
@@SchoolOfAttraction Yeah i agree. He also gives us a good insight into female psychology and how women select mates.he talks about Long term mating strategy vs Short term mating strategy for men. How to build yourself from inside by doing the tough and not so comfortable things so that you don't Have to necessarily fake the Alpha traits. But yeah there is always this element of Deception and Manipulation that will always bug you. But looking back this whole PUA thing help me keep women off the pedestal and gave a sense of social Freedom.
I've noticed all these problems are from Anglo countries
Your talking about attention addiction man
How do you deal with shit tests then ?
Well the thing about a shit test is to recognise what it is - it's either a) she's playing a game with you in which case you ignore it or b) She's seeing something incongruent in your behavior that she doesn't trust and so when you're being up-front and genuine you won't get.
It seems to me that you have gone short on the game. few months is not enough, and you stayed in the mechanical version of the pickup and conquest (Mystery method, which is instrumental). What you are finding now is the second part, which is about growing your real personality matching your own new morality with women. Then you start to reach the "floating stage", like when butterflies start in your body and you get this extra pleasure to interact with women. Nothing to do with checking boxes with an excel sheet.
IMO, PUA is very powerful. The PUA can see how powerful it is when using them. TBH, s3x is the most addictive thing, more than anything else, then I guess the PUA got hooked into the black hole
A golden rule for a drug dealer is never used the drug, and casino mogul is never gamble
Actually, the practitioners can be mastered by the PUA skills & mindset & lust of s3x, if not be careful
The practitioners have to master them, to become a natural
Even Paul Janka knows the player (he didn't believe in PUA) is an act, and he was an actor. The women fell into a fantasy
Today, everyone knows PUA and PUA had a bad rep, all the girls know about PUA and their guard is up and more resistance.
PUA is everywhere, and more competition and the PUA got more frustrated. The old PUA tactics may need to be updated,
Modern PUA mentality is 0% manipulative. Thing that mainstream pickup teach nowadays like RSD is Nothing like your describing. They put emphasis on congruence and taking action and the likes.
Still, very informative video and your'e right pickup used to be quite manipulative in it's early days.
Actually RSD makes those CLAIMS yes - But if you've ever headed out with a group of RSD blokes or spent time in forums listening to advice from coaches - it's clear that this is extremely far from the case. RSD is one of the biggest culprits of teaching narcissistic, manipulative, emotionally unhealthy ethics to men.
SchoolOfAttraction well thx for bringing the whole issue up, I agree that the community hasnt caught up entirely with the congruence teachings of Owen. Still, RSD is definitely the most life changing influence i've had in my life haha, i'm prolly biased a tad bit
This guy is pua becouse he is a dating coach..Semantic dodge artist ....
Are you trying ot argue that it's impossible to teach dating skills to people without being a pickup artist? Nevermind the fact I started the company because I hated pickup artist :/
I...understand your position and it's anecdotal at best. There are many men whose self esteem aren't based on how many lays they have. Who don't necessarily meet toxic women at every corner and lane turned upon.
The picture you paint is idyllic; after your ''transformation'' (which good for you btw if it brings you a measure of dignity and peace) you met women who were wonderful...no toxic ones...at all...Hard to believe statistically. It seems as if, from your revelation, you've painted your new found experiences in a new found light, a thing people should be critical of, myself included.
I agree, to a degree, with your message however deception and manipulations have been employed throughout human history and well to be frank, not all of us feel bad doing so. (shrugs) Nice video though. As much as I disagree with you on many a topic, I do find your presentation of your view fascinating and well put-together, so to speak.