My mum loves me, but whenever I don’t get something it’s always yelling. Everything I can’t do is related to my phone and electronics. Like looking for stuff for example. I can barely find stuff. Yet they keep asking me to look for their stuff, and when naturally I can’t find it, I get yelled at. Then they wonder why I’m in my room all the time
I always apologise... I'm from a family where shouting was a positive and now I'm a parent I no longer see it as a positive. My son is a teenager he's slow but fast when he wants. I cook clean and try and make his life happy but when I have to repeat myself again and again and I'm ignored it hurts and I shouldn't shout but I do. I say how rude it is and then get pulled into a current of I this I that and I hate myself I wish my son knew I'm just scared and I don't want to be what I've been taught but stupidly I do. I know its not right and I hate myself when I explode. I just want my son to be free when he's older. Explore options I hate the world is becoming and sometimes i find it hard that my son is part of an awful generation. I feel guilty I brought a child into this horrible world and I can't give him more. I get angry at myself and I know it's not fair on him. He loves the outdoors abd nature but this society sometimes forces you to be who you are not and the younger generations have it hard. My son is the most precious and amazing gift from the universe I just want to show my appreciation.... This whole gaming Internet world is awful for parents who are single and work. To protect your children you literally have to sacrifice your sanity to keep going into your child's room all night like a prison officer how can you remain patient and not be angry that soneone would disregard your sleep and sanity
@@charlotteanonuevo3867 Honesty really helps, its very hard at first but trying to be open and spending more time with them. Looking someone in the eye when arguing helps them realize that you are human. Also standing your ground also helps when needed, dont be afraid to do it. When you have an argument try to make up at the end, without yelling and apologizing helps. Take little steps, its gonna take awhile.
Yelling is what parents do when they are incapable of articulating their thoughts. Parents resort to yelling out of frustration. Kids may comply to your commands out of intimidation, but not out of understanding. You want your kids to listen to you because they understand why they should as opposed to just complying out of fear.
John Taylor Exactly, kids will always misbehave and make mistakes. And the parent should know and expect that beforehand. So, yelling is not ok. The teen is a teen! It’s what they are supposed to do and your job as a parent is to guide them, not fight them. Oh your kid was caught smoking? Do you yell and hit them? Or talk to them and then take them for a vacation to show them that the world offers different types of fun? My parent is a yelling type. And I can tell you my life is a mess because of it. It is not ok no matter what I did. I did not deserve to be treated badly
Yelling emotionally breaks a child. It doesnt matter the age, it doesnt matter who you are. Yelling at your children or sibling breaks them. I should know.. my family cant have a simple conversation without my mother screaming.. it hurts..
Ikr... I’ve never done anything bad EVER. nothing illegal, rude, or against my fathers rules. Yet he still yells at me over the smallest things. It makes me feel like a bad kid when im not. Same with my little brother. Im worried for him because he’s only 7, yet I can allready see his mental health go down due to my dads behavior
Oh dang I didn't think this would blow up to all you guys I'm not gonna say don't worry, because that isnt much help when you deal with a parent like that please just make an internal promise to yourself once you finish school and can move out you will move out.
Strict crazy rude parents do make me hate them. If I would have parents like that, I would not respect them until they change to good and better parents.
I used to cut myself because of my parents mostly my dad because his face looks like a fucking tomato yelling at me and he wonders why I have bad grades and I don’t tell him because he will say I’m telling excuses so I’m suicidal, depressed, and I have anxiety
The thing is, you should never NEED to yell. You are the boss and speaking quietly does not change that. Yelling means you feel you've lost control and the child senses this. They don't want to be in charge anymore than you want them to be. Michael Caine said the royals never raise their voices because they have power and don't need to. Set an appropriate punishment for wrongdoing and stick to it, speaking normally all the way.
Actually...Parents need to understand that they are not in control. I have a 15 yo daughter...and she is completely free to make her own choices. If we have a disagreement about something...we both sit down and talk about it. I never get angry or annoyed, I want to know what she has to say. And MOST times I side with her.
Its true, maybe not for everyone, but I suffer through it every day. I don't like to complain but inside i feel worthless, like what i do is never good enough even if thats not what my parents intended.
John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." Have a blessed day, brothers and sisters in Christ!
Yelling is emotional abuse. Period. I wish it would get as accepted as physical abuse... yes, I am a victim myself, my mother has been a screaming monster for years, she screamed everyday and I got depression, aniexty and PTSD becauose of it. I'm also very noise sensitive.
No because, its apparently normal now when people yell at me I get so scared like really scared I was called crazy one time but that's how it goes when I was a child. I remmeber telling my father I wish I dued because when he wants to ask me a chore he would immidietly yell not even telling me properly. We never went on vacations or bonding. Now i have father issues and ppl make fun of me i mean. I guess.
I can feel you my mom always yell me in any thing and my father also say me to leave the house Sometime i even get suicide thoughts I am very sensitive person and I just break down I wish one day parent will realise that their child are also human and they also have heart and feeling
I feel the same way and understand you the same way. My mom yelling at me constantly when I was a kid made me become a sensitive fragile person who can’t figure how to deal with situations properly because I’m not mentally strong
I cry when that happens because I get so frustrated that I can't defend myself and say anything back. I get yelled at for no reason, even when I didn't even do anything bad. But they still yell at me for the most retarted things..
I hope you have someone to talk to about this and importantly being honest with yourself and definitely stand up even when your terrified. It gets easier as you grow up the more you stand up for yourself the more resistance you have within yourself when someone is attacking you. But more importantly forgive the abuser and yourself because they may not know any better was probably taught that way to relive frustration. Forgive yourself for witnessing the harm and processing it and its not your fault. Forgive the pain you recieved and still try to be authentic with yourself emotionally and mentally. Speaking out your opinions even though they dont sound good or clear, if you need to yell back, dont yell at the start. When your voice is constantly being pushed back then you can raise your voice and stand your ground. But dont yell when you dont need, only if its the case your voice isnt being heard or they are pushing you to a corner.
I got yelled at for losing 20$ my mom gave me. I was sleeping when my nanny and my cousin were leaving. my cousin took the 20$ and spent it. i got yelled at for something i didn’t know about.
That happened to me all of the time. My father always took out his frustration on me, even if I was innocent, which was 95% of the time. He used to throw beer bottles at me and humiliate me in front of our friends and family. Now I'm older and married with children, my wife screams and yells at my teenage daughters every day. She calls the police on me if I raise my voice to her to defend my girls. They're 12 and 14. Laying here in tears....a 61 year old man in tears....how embarrassing. I've had enough.
I’m not even acting up or doing anything. My mom was trying to take a picture of something on my phone, but the screen was getting dark and was about to shut off, so I tapped it so it didn’t shut off, and my mom went STOP IT DONT DO THAT!!!!! Even tho I was trying to help. The same day, she is mopping the floor, and when I tried to go upstairs from the basement, she screams WHO IS THAT! Then, STAY DOWNSTAIRS YOU NEED TO WAIT, YOU DONT NEED TO GO UPSTAIRS. And the same day, it was around 8:45 and I was playing Xbox with my friends, and I wasn’t hungry. Then my mom SCREAMS my name and says GET UP HERE. Yet when I tried to before she screamed at me. So when I got up there she started to repeat angrily, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO EAT, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO EAT. I said I’ll have a sandwich and she gets angry for no reason and is all angry, and my dad said she can go take her shower while he makes my sandwich. I sat down at the table and cried for 15 minutes straight because the whole day my mom was yelling and screaming at me for no reason the WHOLE DAY. I never said anything to her or did anything bad that made her mad. She was just super angry at me for no apparent reason. I cried for minute after minute, and my dad had to calm me down. I think my mom is one of the reasons why I’m always so sad in life. The whole entire day she yelled, screamed, and was angry at me when I did absolutely nothing. Also, my mom calls me dumb, and calls me gay even though I’m not. I feel like I’m useless in this world when she yells at me, calls me dumb, calls me gay even though I’m not, and yells at me if I get an 85% on my tests (I’m not Asian or Indian)
My mom yells at me all day over all the little problems I caused. I couldn't handle it today so I stepped outside for a minute, and she locked me out. My dad wasn't home and neither was my brother. This happens to me every day, and I'm becoming severely sad. It's been 20 minutes and I'm still sitting in my garage.
When I ask my dad to stop yelling he yells 10 times louder and swears 5 times more and hits the wall/doors. So yes, parents always do the right thing for their kids ""
Me too man whenever my mom yells at me and threatens me for something it gives me horrible flashbacks when I had when I was a child. I’m 17 and I’m trying to look for a job to move out and live on my own and become financially and mentally responsible
@@charlotteanonuevo3867 yesss, whenever im being shouted at for just being. i always say 'Pleae stop shouting at me , i dont like it and i havent done anything wrong.' and then my mum or dad just shout, 'im not shouting , your so sensitive' and then proceed to make fun of me to the point where i cry and run to my room.
Yelling gets nothing across to your child and parents seem not to know. It just gets the child mad or scared bc of the parent. the best way from a teenagers point of view is actually talking and having communication, you get ur point across and nobody is mad
As a kid I agree yelling at me won't have me listening to the sh*t the person has to say, I will simply cry then go back to being how I was before the next day (so yelling at me gives them no benefit whatsoever. I'll simply get ruder, refuse to take orders, resent the lunatic/person for a short period of time and repeat the same actions again and again (whether that's to purposely annoy them or unintentionally) etc). tbh if anything it makes the person yelling at me look like a total lunatic. I've told my relative that yelling at me is useless but they refuse to listen. Sorry for the harsh comment.
Ikr my parents think yelling and being psychotic and loud solves everything. Also they threaten me. Like I'm literally a kid and I happened to fail like one or two classwork assignments and they yell at me to go downstairs and then they make a whole damn scene for like, an hour. When my mother was looking at those 2 grades she said something like "get over here NOW." In an unnecessarily loud tone. And I said "why, I already know that I failed" and then she threatens me by saying that she's going to f*cking knock me out and make me see stars over a fucking classwork grade. I'm literally a child trying my best actually turning in school work and then they treat me even worse than when I wasn't turning in work last year? I don't get it. But basically all that the both of them do is yell to get their way
As a teen, i can confirm that I cru everyday because of my parents yell at me. I do chores, cook for my mom, take my dog on every single walk im supposed to without being asked, and then i play my video games 10 mins late and they yell at me so much, i go in my room and try
my dad actually yells at me so much, that every time his bedroom door opens, i get a little sicker to my stomach. he has never apologized to me, he has never once thought that yelling at me might be why i don’t talk to people about my feelings or why i don’t see myself to be as good as anyone else sees me- hell, he found out that i had a crush on a girl (i’m a female) and literally took my phone from me and then yelled at me. this morning, he came home from work, looked around, and burst into my room while i was sleeping and yelled at me for not sweeping the floors like he asked me to do. it was kinda like “HEY! WHAT WAS THE ONE THING I ASKED YOU TO DO LAST NIGHT?!” “Clean the floors..” “DID YOU DO IT?!” “no..” “Okay.” but it wasn’t like a normal tone. he used that passive aggressive tone that basically said “don’t expect anything else from me.” if you have parents like this, you know the voice. i just want him to understand that just because he is the parent and that he is the one making decisions, i should still have my feelings considered as well. never in my life has this man sat me down and asked how i was doing. you wanna know what he did when i tried to commit suicide? “So you think you have it bad? You do realize that suicide is the most selfish thing anyone can do right? Are you trying to ruin my life?!” so if suicide is selfish, what are you doing right now? i would think telling your 13 year old suicidal daughter that her only way out is “selfish” is some sort of big no no in the parenting book. but he topped it all off with “well, you gotta understand. i have never felt that way so i don’t understand how you feel.”
I felt this. This is why when I have kids I’m a try my hardest to not yell at them because I know what it feels like. Even now I can’t talk to nobody rationally when I get yelled at because I’m fighting the urge to yell back to make things worse.
Jaquaylen Forrest I understand. Honestly when he yells at me, i want to yell back so that he might grasp how i feel. Yelling at your kids, in my opinion, is probably one of the worst things. The feeling of getting yelled at weighs on children and even though you’re “trying to teach them” it only builds up a wall and sooner or later, the parent will hit that wall and realize that they can’t go around. my dad hasn’t stopped yelling at me. that day, he went as far as to say “if these floors and everything else isn’t done, i’m gonna beat your ass when i get home. i don’t care. whether you’re asleep or not, i’ll just start swinging.” He came back a couple minutes later and said “So you’re just gonna cry about it? Really?” so i stopped giving him a reaction. i went straight faced, ignored him when i could and gave him a dry answer when i had to talk.
I'm currently going through this with my wife. She yells at my teenage daughters every day. I'm at my wits end. I'm having a nervous breakdown as I'm typing this. Good luck.
Yelling just makes everyone feel awful. It's so belittling for the person who gets yelled at and it doesn't make the person who yells feel any better. At least in my case, it can make the person who's being yelled at feel as though they're too stupid to be talked to in a normal way. As someone who's a teen and who gets yelled/cursed at by my parents from time to time, all it does is make me feel anxious, sad, and I can't focus on anything once it's happened. Like calm down this does nothing for me!!
agreed. while I didn't grow up being yelled at, there were quite a few things that my family could have provided but were...uh "lacking" in, the result of this was at times me shedding tears simply at the idea that someone would just up and trust what I was telling them, or just thanking me, or god forbid accept an apology. I suppose it would be even worse if I would also have some louder, even more aggressive person breathing down my neck in the same house I had to live in
My parents always yelled at my siblings and I, and I don't think it was right. Did it effect me? Yeah, I cried after it. It made me feel really weak. When I do become a parent, I won't yell.
My mother is always yelling at my sister and it scares me so mich because her room is next to mine (she has no problem with it, she provocates it every day) I know I have no right to be scared but I can't help it. They are just insulting me all the time.
i always get yelled at no matter how big or small the case maybe, no matter if i over-look something, forgot something, or don't do things in "their" timly matter (by "their" i mean i should be done with everything faster than the speed of light right after they tell me to) and of course the next step is beating and taking things away (which doesn't go well with me (the beating part because of retaliation [runs in the dad side family] and taking things away will just find a way to get it back)
I've tried telling my mom to stop yelling, even after she apologized and explained she only yells (as in she knows she does it but has no intention on stopping) because she's tired, cranky or something isn't going her way, but every time I tell her to stop yelling at me, she always gives me a list of why she does. Like how I forget to clean on one day, even though I've cleaned all week and simply chose the one day she was busy to take care of myself and my mental health, or when something gets lost that I know nothing about (like something for work or something she bought herself that I had yet to see or know of), and stuff like that. I'm basically always the scapegoat for the days she's the most busy, and every time I try to do things before she arrives back home to help her relax, she never notices and always yells at me anyways, right up until she finally eats and has her coffee. And even when I try to soothe her by asking what I can do to help her, I'm still yelled at and told to "just go"....so I end up spending every Saturday hiding in my room until she's sleepy and calm enough to be around. I'm 23, by the way, and I'm honestly questioning if I'm the problem or if this is abuse. I want to move out so badly, but I have no money.
everythin you said i can relate to im always the scape goat and everytime i try to say its not me or "talk back" they freakin yell and I just want to slap them in the face sometimes
Remember those days when your parents wouldn’t yell at you and would love you but today all of thats gone and you try to do something but it doesn’t result in anything 💀
I get hit and yelled at. I'm pretty sure I have depression and almost 100% certain that I have anxiety. I used to cry a lot, I did self-harm, I have suicidal thoughts 25/8, and I have panic attacks often. I am now used to having panic attacks in a way, which is more painful in my opinion. Quietly. My parents threatened to beat the heck out of me if I had panic attacks again. Recently, I had a panic attack at school because my parents won't hear me screaming in pain there, I never did tell them that happened. I considered going to the school psychologist, but I'm just too scared. I have a friend who did self-harm, but fortunately only one day and she stopped. She is currently working on getting meds, while my parents are over here telling me "It's just a phase", "It's just hormones", "You're fine, you're life is perfect you have no right to be like this. We spoil you and you do this?! We've been through war and nothing like this happened to us, so get a grip, before I give you something to cry about." I don't feel safe in my so-called 'home' anymore. Every day when school is over I hear everyone become so enthusiastic. I want to leave school but I don't want to go home. I have thought about taking my own life on the spot while seeing the things needed to do so before me and grabbing them. My first-time experiencing this was in school when my 'depression' started. I was walking towards the window and grabbed the window frame. I realized that I wasn't high enough to die from doing so, so I walked back to my seat. Another time was when I opened the fridge we keep the medicines in. I saw so many pills and grabbed one of the ones that were too strong for me. I let go of it before someone noticed, but in the few seconds I held it, I thought about overdosing. I just had one of those 'silent' panic attacks. I wish my parents would understand. I used to get emotional support from my friends, but nowadays I don't even bother asking. I hope they like what they and the world did to their 'precious baby daughter'. I might add more later. If you read all of this, thank you and sorry for wasting your time. Edit 1: I forgot to add that if it's not one of my three best friends raising their hand in my direction, I'll instantly get into a defensive position and flinch.
I’m so sorry that you had experience all this. Hopefully you get away from them. They seriously got mad at you that you had a panic attack like what’s wrong with them. Like seriously something is wrong with your parents.
No, not their friend, their parent. Kids have to know that their parents can always be there for them, but when they do wrong, they should know it's not right.
@Emily S one of the upper-hands of growing up with some sort of inflicted trauma in an age of the internet, now that trauma doesn't have to spread through you, you can see the good and identify it from the bad online, understand that what *they* did to you isn't/shouldn't be the norm, and you can begin actively getting rid of your own infective toxicity.
When my dad yells at me I stand there and take it because I feel like if I talk back to him it will get worse. My dads anger issues scare me to the point I cry. Whenever someone else yells at me I don’t cry, but when it comes to my dad yes. My dad always tells me “You gotta stop crying all the time”. I can’t help it if his anger issues scares me. Whenever He yells at me I fear that he will smack me one day, he has not done it before but I fear he will
h0l0gr4m_ I’m sorry that happened to you. I hope things get better for you. Fathers should never do that stuff to there kids. It can scare me on how the world works.
Why are some humans so evil? Panic attacks, anxiety, self-doubt, fear of success, social-anxiety, pressure, depression, afraid to say no, afraid to live life, suicidal thoughts, fear of failure, nervousness, getting startled, over apologizing, starting over, and trying to please people who are incapable of happiness. One would rather die then spend the rest of thier life trying to meet impossible expectations. Yelling traumatizes people.
cheekyoongi That is called a zero sum game. My mom did the same. “You can tell me anything. I just want honesty.” She would say. That is a lie and a half I told myself. Adult estrangement is not abuse, toxicity is.
my parents have been yelling and cussing and used to hit me occasionally and it really fucked me up. I don't feel comfortable talking to them about anything and it's definitely contributed to my depression.
I’m so sorry. If they abused you, you should move out and try to get a job and not to talk to them for good and if they do want to talk tell them about all the experiences and trauma you had when you were a child. You shouldn’t have to go through this. I hope you are doing well now
Children are not pet or toys you can just yell at and hit. Children have just as many feelings as the parents, and they are just as valid. Being a child is hard enough, don’t make it any harder.
My parents never apoligis to me when they yell at me Not even when im in my rooms cry loudly with an Open door when they hear IT they Just Close the door
It’s sad that I’m not a teenager anymore and my father still yells even louder. He doesn’t care about my feelings 💔. It’s really sad and I’m typing this while crying like why do I have to deal with this for so long. My self esteem is really bad and I don’t think that I can love him really like I suppose to do. I’m not even brave enough to commit suicide
So, if I am a parent, I guess I can say this to my child if he/she did something bad: I am very disappointed at you. What you did is wrong. You really should not do that. I guess I can tell my child to go to his/her room to reflect on what she has done.
Yeah my parents yelled at me earlier because I poured too much cold drink for my brother. They could have just asked me to remove some, but no they started yelling at me and saying I did it on purpose. They are as emotionally mature as children. Actually I’ve worked with five year old children and those children were more emotionally mature than them. They could be calmed down by talking about their emotions and what was upsetting them. If I did that with my parents they’d yell at me for patronising them.
True..I always help my parents to do their work like help cook,wash dishes and clothes..and they doesn't care about me at all they just keep on yelling at me like I didn't even help them with anything and I hate it..I kinda feel like I need to cut myself..all the yelling I got everyday every second made me feel depression I always try to impress them with my hard work I tried to help them everyday because they have to go to work everyday and came home late.. I understand they felt tired and thats why I always help them with home work but all I got was yelling they doesn't care if they hurt my feelings and I don't want to try to speak up for myself because I know they will yell at me even more..so I just shut my mouth and hold my tears until they leave my room...
My parents are constantly verbally abusive towards me and they always deny it and then expect an apology FROM ME after I literally did nothing. They always start fights for no reason and blame it on me. I try and get out of the house as much as a can but it's not enough and I can't take it anymore. I've contemplated suicide many times and they never listen and always victimize themselves. I never peeled loved in my home and I don't think I have anything to I've for anymore because they (and my siblings) always tell me they wish I was aborted.
my mum screams at me for no reason whatsoever, she will call me useless, worthless, tell me she doesn't care about me, tell me she will put me in care, tell me she will cut all contact with me, she doesn't fell empathy, she doesn't accept that she is wrong, I am only 13. what do I do?
Neither do mine. They think they’re perfect and blame me for everything. They actively try to suppress me independence and make my more reliant on them and other people then complain that I’m not independent enough or going to make it in the real world.
WARNING: VENT COMMENT, you're allowed to ignore this, I'm not abused, but I have been yelled at. In response to me making a mistake, my mom has yelled over and over about what I did was wrong. I know it was wrong, I know that I need to improve, I don't need it hammered in.. It makes me uncontrollably cry for about 30 minutes without being able to stop in front of her in moments that she has yelled at me. I'm hyper sensitive, I'm fearful of being yelled at for mistakes, so I am prone to trying to run from my problems or do them on my own without consulting others for help in fear of being yelled at for making that mistake, the longer I wait the more I run from my problems, and then I'm asked why I didn't ask for help and waited so long. It's uncommon for her to yell at me, once a month or less usually, but in moments where she has the uncontrollable crying was awful, the helplessness and knowing that whatever I say I probably won't get her to leave and calm down or see my point of view. She has PTSD (I had to overhear a conversation to learn that), depression, and anxiety, she's also prone to migraines, not a good combo. If I make a mistake, I just have to hope she's not in a really bad mood or having a migraine. It more or less causes fear for me, and uncontrollable crying + social anxiety is a bad combo, I don't like the self induced shame I feel for being unable to stop ugly crying. Otherwise my mother is really good, she has good views on the world and tries to be a good parent, but her major flaw in parenting is yelling at me. I love her, but she's just so assertive sometimes. I think she's insecure about others stabbing her in the back or manipulating or walking over her due to past experiences, she seems like she used to be shy and kind of a pushover. Sorry for venting, again I love my mother, I wouldn't ask for another, but even though she's become more understanding, yelling has given me problems. About 80% of days are perfectly fine though, I'm usually happy and I don't have depression, I don't self harm, I don't have major issues like a certain two family members. I love life but yelling sucks, if you yell at your kids as punishment please stop. - from a teenager
MORE VENTING (to make myself feel better :>) I'm not the one with the issues in this family, my grandmother and mother are. Grandmother was abused as a child by mother and took blame for siblings to defend them, mother was abused by my father physically and probably sexually at 1? - 19 (age she had me), life is cruel sometimes.
mom: Yelling at me 4 year old me: starts crying mom: still yelling at me mom: yelling at me Me now: Don't give the reaction she expects mom: gives up a few seconds later
I hate that, i keep thinking that i’ll just answer back to protect myself, but when i’m actually in the moment i cant do it, then my siblings make fun of me for getting shouted at..
When I was young my dad never yelled at me or my older sister my mom passed away the day I was born 20yrs ago when I told my dad I was pregnant and he always treated me like his princess he said everything will be alright he passed away on Christmas and I'm a mother to a three year old girl and two twins my first daughter's dad broke up with me in the hospital and my twins dad we were going to get married passed away in a car accident days before I was giving birth I had the twins a week ago and it's very very difficult
@@averylonelysalmon "not saying I am any better" you say? that is the beginning of admirable improvement, you know, you just have to consciously take a few steps back and correct yourself once you identify it happening
When I was young, like really young, my dad had anger problems. I mean, he still does, but he's improved a lot in controlling his emotions. Anyway, he'd yell a lot at me. It took a massive toll on me. So big that even to this day, more than a decade later, I'm still afraid of him. I love him. He loves me. We do our best. He understands that he caused horrible trauma.
Parents need to understand that they are not in control. I have a 15 yo daughter...and she is completely free to make her own choices without any punishment or consequences from me. I have never told her to do anything, she does it if she wants to. Like...she hates cleaning...so I don't make her....I clean everything! If we have a disagreement about something...we both sit down and talk about it. I never get angry or annoyed, I want to know what she has to say. And MOST times I side with her. Whatever her choice is, IF I can fulfill that choice for her, I give it to her....its not my place to make choices for her!
I have the ability to bottle up my emotions and I usually bite my tongue but after like 3 months of putting up with it I yell back and they send me to my room, take my phone, shut out the power to my room and I’m just expected to behave now!!! Wtf!!!
My parents yell at me over little things. My grades have sunk and all that and they get in my face and yell at me. I get angry and sad and then they try to joke with me a few minutes after but my mood was already stressed and destroyed. I never have been one to say things about how I feel nor how things affect me and I write it out. I once wrote out my feelings towards them and my dad almost found it. It was also in my “suicidal” journal and I just... when my brother found the journal and handed it to my dad cus it was a diArY and my brother wanted to read it.. I almost broke down in front of my parents, breathing heavily and shaking. When my dad gave it to me I bolted my ass upstairs after and just shut down completely. I was on a call with someone too.
My parents favor my other siblings more than me. I understand that it’s hard to deal with me at times because of my mental state, but it would be nice if they smiled at me or even hugged me once in a while, probably even told me they were proud of me? ;w;
Today I spoke to my mom confused because she misunderstood me when I was talking about a road looking small and she misheard some random sentence and then asked me if I was listening to a true crime podcast so I said "What? No... What does that have to do with what I said?" And she said she didn't like the way I spoke to her these last couple days. She said she doesn't know where my attitude has been coming from, yet I 've not spoken to her much these last couple days. She then asks if I'm acting this way because I'm going to my house near my best friend/cousins (whos mom she has a decade worth of hate for, all because of self confidence issues and a couple misunderstandings) and I then got mad and proceeded to be a bit more rude with my tone because she blames my best friend for no reason. I barely get to hang out with her but when shes over if my mom senses even a bit of anger in my voice about something she does then she threatens to never let my friend come over again. Shes already banned me from going over to their house for the night and unnofically banned me from hanging out there too. I'm so sad because I travel full time in an RV so all my other friends feel like part time friends but I tell her everything that happens and I trust her so much and we talk like 5 hours a day on video calls but I never get to see her in person or do anything fun with her anymore unless its at a family event and its during the 1 month we're actually in the same state ughhh
Everytime I use to goof around with my peers in front of my mom she would start yelling at me and getting mad at me. I mean it was understandable because back then I copied behavior just to get attention and because I had trouble making friends, but everytime I did something funny that was harmless she would get very mad at me, and everytime I spoke or made gestures she would say WHY DO YOU SPEAK LIKE THIS WHY DO YOU MAKE GESTURES LIKE THIS?! I started feeling controlled like I couldn’t act or say anything and that I’d had to rely on my mom on what to say and how to say it, I basically relied everything on my mom of what to do or what not to do so my mom wouldn’t get mad and yelled at me. Also, everytime I misbehaved a little or forgot to do a chore or even at random moments she would bring up something from that past that she didn’t like that I did. But now, everything is much better, I was diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome a few months ago and now my mom understands me, I told her about how she made me feel in the past, she said that it was not her intention of her making me feel controlled, she was just “trying” to correct me or “help” me but I guess she sometimes “lost control” and yelled at me because she thought I was just immature. But Anyways, everything is better now.
Tw: SH and probably more, My experience My father had always shouted at me and my older sister pretty much anytime that we made a mistake, whether it was playing with our food (in our younger ages) or other small mistakes. He would sometimes not want to shout in a public place or just got too frustrated so he would slap/hit us "gently" instead. I eventually learned how to just 'tune out' of the argument and completely ignore their shouting while still responding to them in the manner they wanted. Then after a build up of stress, anxiety, and getting shouted at almost everyday I resorted to SH which my father than found out while pulling my sleeves up because I refused too. He had a pretty bad reaction from it and said something along the lines of "If i can shout at you what do you want me to do, hit you?" I then tried to stop SH and/or hide it more thoroughly untill I managed to stop the long periods of times. Although he has changed and tries his best not to shout or threaten its effected me a lot more than they know
I'm not a problematic child, not at all, but my family treated me like I am one, whenever I do things right like cleaning my room, my toilet and take out the garbage, they were NEVER there to see me doing it, infact they never praised me for it. But when they see me at my worst, like if i do mistakes or if i miss a task to do, they are ALWAYS the first people to witness it and find a way to yell at me as if they have every reason to, they call me "lazy'' "useless'' "stupid" and so on. The only emotion I ever got from them is that they are narcisistic, angry and likes to yell a lot, never have I ever seen them try to talk to me without yelling once, they are that bad. Look I get it, "This is their way to show care, so at least show respect, appreciate it"*---- no, it's not, even if it is, I STRONGLY disagree with it, it's just wrong, parents are supposed to be fun to be around, right? You know the kinds of parent who relates to their own child? Showing empathy for example and ONLY yell when it's necessary. If you're going to be a parent, PLEASE, understand your own childen and help him, help him like how your helping yourself and please... No yelling.
maybe parents could’ve just talked to us and still be reasonable, instead of yelling, pointing and slapping us (idk if your parents do that, cause mine does) Occasionally she calls us bad names like ‘dumb’, and ‘stupid’. I still love her, but I also hate her. I don’t know how to think about my mom- she just yells and whatnot. Dad is fine, sometimes he’ll but not that much, so I’m cool with him. The only things yelling teaches the kid is that their worthless, and can’t stand up for others (since sometimes they can’t stand up for the,selves when they get yelled at.) *Parents, put yourself in the kids shoes and see how you are acting. Reconsider, parents. :)*
I wish I can show this video to my parents but that will only result in them yelling louder
Same
I feel you😪
Same :(
Same here :(
I'm glad im not alone
Every teenager out there, remember: Be the parent one day that you always wanted!
Thank you
@@autumn0-032 same im 15 I wanna act better then they do now
My mum loves me, but whenever I don’t get something it’s always yelling. Everything I can’t do is related to my phone and electronics. Like looking for stuff for example. I can barely find stuff. Yet they keep asking me to look for their stuff, and when naturally I can’t find it, I get yelled at. Then they wonder why I’m in my room all the time
@@mrfelifell ik that feeling, but just push through it will get better
I dont want a child, but I'll be the best pet owner.
The parents aren't always right though everybody makes mistakes but as a parent you never think to apologize
I always apologise... I'm from a family where shouting was a positive and now I'm a parent I no longer see it as a positive. My son is a teenager he's slow but fast when he wants. I cook clean and try and make his life happy but when I have to repeat myself again and again and I'm ignored it hurts and I shouldn't shout but I do. I say how rude it is and then get pulled into a current of I this I that and I hate myself I wish my son knew I'm just scared and I don't want to be what I've been taught but stupidly I do. I know its not right and I hate myself when I explode. I just want my son to be free when he's older. Explore options I hate the world is becoming and sometimes i find it hard that my son is part of an awful generation. I feel guilty I brought a child into this horrible world and I can't give him more. I get angry at myself and I know it's not fair on him. He loves the outdoors abd nature but this society sometimes forces you to be who you are not and the younger generations have it hard. My son is the most precious and amazing gift from the universe I just want to show my appreciation.... This whole gaming Internet world is awful for parents who are single and work. To protect your children you literally have to sacrifice your sanity to keep going into your child's room all night like a prison officer how can you remain patient and not be angry that soneone would disregard your sleep and sanity
JoshSoScrewedUp713 my dad always thinks hes right and if i try to speak up he tells me to shut up!
So true
@@charlotteanonuevo3867 Honesty really helps, its very hard at first but trying to be open and spending more time with them. Looking someone in the eye when arguing helps them realize that you are human. Also standing your ground also helps when needed, dont be afraid to do it. When you have an argument try to make up at the end, without yelling and apologizing helps. Take little steps, its gonna take awhile.
Not all parents are the same.
Yelling is what parents do when they are incapable of articulating their thoughts. Parents resort to yelling out of frustration. Kids may comply to your commands out of intimidation, but not out of understanding. You want your kids to listen to you because they understand why they should as opposed to just complying out of fear.
John Taylor
Exactly, kids will always misbehave and make mistakes. And the parent should know and expect that beforehand. So, yelling is not ok. The teen is a teen! It’s what they are supposed to do and your job as a parent is to guide them, not fight them. Oh your kid was caught smoking? Do you yell and hit them? Or talk to them and then take them for a vacation to show them that the world offers different types of fun?
My parent is a yelling type. And I can tell you my life is a mess because of it. It is not ok no matter what I did. I did not deserve to be treated badly
only if every parent understands that. or at least are willing to understand, willing to give it a thought. but that hardly happens
@John Taylor looks like you're a true dickhead.
@John Taylor not you assuming my gender 😍😍😍
@John Taylor what does this reply have to do with the comment
Yelling emotionally breaks a child. It doesnt matter the age, it doesnt matter who you are. Yelling at your children or sibling breaks them. I should know.. my family cant have a simple conversation without my mother screaming.. it hurts..
I feel you. Having my mother yell so mucb every day... Sending vitural hugs 🤗 and all the positive energy I can to you
I tune out. Because it’s a waste of time to listen. Like the video says, when the parent yells, lashes out, they lose an argument.
@@melaniebuford if I did that they’d scream at me more and then pretend like they fucking care afterwards
@@melaniebuford hahaha my mom is still POS and wont even aqnowledge what she put me throught
My mom inflicted me with depression and just doesnt care at all.
Even if you are a good kid, and obedient you get yelled at for the smallest mistakes, or forgetfulness.
This is me 100% me. It hurts
Ikr... I’ve never done anything bad EVER. nothing illegal, rude, or against my fathers rules. Yet he still yells at me over the smallest things. It makes me feel like a bad kid when im not. Same with my little brother. Im worried for him because he’s only 7, yet I can allready see his mental health go down due to my dads behavior
Oh dang I didn't think this would blow up to all you guys I'm not gonna say don't worry, because that isnt much help when you deal with a parent like that please just make an internal promise to yourself once you finish school and can move out you will move out.
This is so me. Sometimes I wonder whether I should just give up or not. I don't even feel safe in my own "Home"
Being a better kid just makes them get worse. Learning from experience
The group of parents just laughed at how they all raised hands when they yelled at their child. It actually breaks my heart if my parents did that.
Wait, your parents don’t!? I thought all parents did that?
@@plant2188 same
@UNIT: THOT Destroyer what do u mean
Same
They laughed at the awkward question
in a self deprecating
I swear I'm the least favorite sibling and it really shows, but when my parents yell at me I start crying and no one in my house cares
@Turboyoshi0406 same
Strict crazy rude parents do make me hate them. If I would have parents like that, I would not respect them until they change to good and better parents.
@@tonisam962 Thank you.
Same here. My dad has only yelled at ME the way he does, never ever my siblings.
Bella Vostrejs sorry bro that must be sad 😔
i’m such a sensitive kid and when i get yelled at i go to my room to cool off but then they yell louder
Same expect I get anxiety attacks
Same it sucks
Reminds me of when i hid in my room every friday because my parents were throwing stuff and yelling
I still have the blanket i hid under
Same but my parents NEVER STOP YELLING
Parents: yell at child
Child: *cries*
Parents: *yelling even louder* STOP CRYING OR I WILL PUNISH YOU
Child: *wakes up the neighbourhood*
I hate it when my parents yell at me it does cause my depression and anxiety
fallofthefandoms Same
Me too
I used to cut myself because of my parents mostly my dad because his face looks like a fucking tomato yelling at me and he wonders why I have bad grades and I don’t tell him because he will say I’m telling excuses so I’m suicidal, depressed, and I have anxiety
@John Taylor damn your parents really do hate u
People used to kill children for showing signs of weakness you get yelled at a little and now your depressed grow up
The thing is, you should never NEED to yell. You are the boss and speaking quietly does not change that. Yelling means you feel you've lost control and the child senses this. They don't want to be in charge anymore than you want them to be. Michael Caine said the royals never raise their voices because they have power and don't need to. Set an appropriate punishment for wrongdoing and stick to it, speaking normally all the way.
@John Taylor shutup already dumbass
@John Taylor ew, a Trump supporter.
Actually...Parents need to understand that they are not in control. I have a 15 yo daughter...and she is completely free to make her own choices.
If we have a disagreement about something...we both sit down and talk about it. I never get angry or annoyed, I want to know what she has to say. And MOST times I side with her.
@@plant2188 exactly. They want to feel like equals.
@@perryh.5306 that’s a great thing! Keep it up
Its true, maybe not for everyone, but I suffer through it every day. I don't like to complain but inside i feel worthless, like what i do is never good enough even if thats not what my parents intended.
i feel u
Wordd
This is what I feel right now and I’m 12
John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." Have a blessed day, brothers and sisters in Christ!
@@KJ-og1cc Im really sorry, i hope things have got somewhat better in the 11months you posted that comment
Yelling is emotional abuse. Period. I wish it would get as accepted as physical abuse... yes, I am a victim myself, my mother has been a screaming monster for years, she screamed everyday and I got depression, aniexty and PTSD becauose of it. I'm also very noise sensitive.
No because, its apparently normal now when people yell at me I get so scared like really scared I was called crazy one time but that's how it goes when I was a child. I remmeber telling my father I wish I dued because when he wants to ask me a chore he would immidietly yell not even telling me properly. We never went on vacations or bonding. Now i have father issues and ppl make fun of me i mean. I guess.
I can feel you my mom always yell me in any thing and my father also say me to leave the house
Sometime i even get suicide thoughts I am very sensitive person and I just break down
I wish one day parent will realise that their child are also human and they also have heart and feeling
I feel the same way
I feel the same way and understand you the same way. My mom yelling at me constantly when I was a kid made me become a sensitive fragile person who can’t figure how to deal with situations properly because I’m not mentally strong
Me tf 2
For some reason the only thing that makes me cry is adults yelling at me.
I cry when that happens because I get so frustrated that I can't defend myself and say anything back. I get yelled at for no reason, even when I didn't even do anything bad. But they still yell at me for the most retarted things..
I hope you have someone to talk to about this and importantly being honest with yourself and definitely stand up even when your terrified. It gets easier as you grow up the more you stand up for yourself the more resistance you have within yourself when someone is attacking you. But more importantly forgive the abuser and yourself because they may not know any better was probably taught that way to relive frustration. Forgive yourself for witnessing the harm and processing it and its not your fault. Forgive the pain you recieved and still try to be authentic with yourself emotionally and mentally. Speaking out your opinions even though they dont sound good or clear, if you need to yell back, dont yell at the start. When your voice is constantly being pushed back then you can raise your voice and stand your ground. But dont yell when you dont need, only if its the case your voice isnt being heard or they are pushing you to a corner.
@@perciousmatter7001 thanks
@@notebook1148 ❤ hope ur doing well
Same omg
So I’m not the only one who flinches and automatically try to curl up
I do that
I got yelled at for losing 20$ my mom gave me.
I was sleeping when my nanny and my cousin were leaving.
my cousin took the 20$ and spent it.
i got yelled at for something i didn’t know about.
I hate that
@@dariusharley5548 same
That’s abuse.
Story of my life
That happened to me all of the time. My father always took out his frustration on me, even if I was innocent, which was 95% of the time. He used to throw beer bottles at me and humiliate me in front of our friends and family. Now I'm older and married with children, my wife screams and yells at my teenage daughters every day. She calls the police on me if I raise my voice to her to defend my girls. They're 12 and 14. Laying here in tears....a 61 year old man in tears....how embarrassing. I've had enough.
I’m not even acting up or doing anything. My mom was trying to take a picture of something on my phone, but the screen was getting dark and was about to shut off, so I tapped it so it didn’t shut off, and my mom went STOP IT DONT DO THAT!!!!! Even tho I was trying to help. The same day, she is mopping the floor, and when I tried to go upstairs from the basement, she screams WHO IS THAT! Then, STAY DOWNSTAIRS YOU NEED TO WAIT, YOU DONT NEED TO GO UPSTAIRS. And the same day, it was around 8:45 and I was playing Xbox with my friends, and I wasn’t hungry. Then my mom SCREAMS my name and says GET UP HERE. Yet when I tried to before she screamed at me. So when I got up there she started to repeat angrily, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO EAT, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO EAT. I said I’ll have a sandwich and she gets angry for no reason and is all angry, and my dad said she can go take her shower while he makes my sandwich. I sat down at the table and cried for 15 minutes straight because the whole day my mom was yelling and screaming at me for no reason the WHOLE DAY. I never said anything to her or did anything bad that made her mad. She was just super angry at me for no apparent reason. I cried for minute after minute, and my dad had to calm me down. I think my mom is one of the reasons why I’m always so sad in life. The whole entire day she yelled, screamed, and was angry at me when I did absolutely nothing. Also, my mom calls me dumb, and calls me gay even though I’m not. I feel like I’m useless in this world when she yells at me, calls me dumb, calls me gay even though I’m not, and yells at me if I get an 85% on my tests (I’m not Asian or Indian)
Yo u could talk to me bro don’t matter how embarrassing it is
im asian send help
How are you now? And how is your mom acting now?
Why would u make ur mom mop the floor why dont u do that she couldn't have been mad at u
And by the time u finish she could have done ur sandwich and u take it to go play game
My mom yells at me all day over all the little problems I caused. I couldn't handle it today so I stepped outside for a minute, and she locked me out. My dad wasn't home and neither was my brother. This happens to me every day, and I'm becoming severely sad. It's been 20 minutes and I'm still sitting in my garage.
im so sorry. i can't imagine how much that must've hurt. are you doing better now?
@@ehs35 yea i wonder how they're feeling now
When I ask my dad to stop yelling he yells 10 times louder and swears 5 times more and hits the wall/doors. So yes, parents always do the right thing for their kids ""
It’s happened so much that I had childhood trauma and now when I get yelled at, I disassociate and now, i don’t really feel emotions.
I got chronic pains from curling in a ball and high depression aka im scarred for life
Me too man whenever my mom yells at me and threatens me for something it gives me horrible flashbacks when I had when I was a child. I’m 17 and I’m trying to look for a job to move out and live on my own and become financially and mentally responsible
My mom says she “raises her voice”, which is apparently different.
And when *I* raise my voice *I’m* the one shouting? It doesn’t make sense...
Same, but my mom says it’s her natural voice and it’s just firm 🙄
@@charlotteanonuevo3867 yesss, whenever im being shouted at for just being. i always say 'Pleae stop shouting at me , i dont like it and i havent done anything wrong.' and then my mum or dad just shout, 'im not shouting , your so sensitive' and then proceed to make fun of me to the point where i cry and run to my room.
Same thing. Any mother who cannot admit faults are immature.
My mom says the same thing. It’s the same damn thing, rephrasing it doesn’t make it feel any better
Yelling gets nothing across to your child and parents seem not to know. It just gets the child mad or scared bc of the parent. the best way from a teenagers point of view is actually talking and having communication, you get ur point across and nobody is mad
As a kid I agree yelling at me won't have me listening to the sh*t the person has to say, I will simply cry then go back to being how I was before the next day (so yelling at me gives them no benefit whatsoever. I'll simply get ruder, refuse to take orders, resent the lunatic/person for a short period of time and repeat the same actions again and again (whether that's to purposely annoy them or unintentionally) etc). tbh if anything it makes the person yelling at me look like a total lunatic. I've told my relative that yelling at me is useless but they refuse to listen. Sorry for the harsh comment.
Ikr my parents think yelling and being psychotic and loud solves everything. Also they threaten me. Like I'm literally a kid and I happened to fail like one or two classwork assignments and they yell at me to go downstairs and then they make a whole damn scene for like, an hour. When my mother was looking at those 2 grades she said something like "get over here NOW." In an unnecessarily loud tone. And I said "why, I already know that I failed" and then she threatens me by saying that she's going to f*cking knock me out and make me see stars over a fucking classwork grade. I'm literally a child trying my best actually turning in school work and then they treat me even worse than when I wasn't turning in work last year? I don't get it.
But basically all that the both of them do is yell to get their way
@@starfan1433 it’s just dumb and stupid im surprised that kids don’t turn around and try to kill that person.
As a teen, i can confirm that I cru everyday because of my parents yell at me. I do chores, cook for my mom, take my dog on every single walk im supposed to without being asked, and then i play my video games 10 mins late and they yell at me so much, i go in my room and try
my dad actually yells at me so much, that every time his bedroom door opens, i get a little sicker to my stomach. he has never apologized to me, he has never once thought that yelling at me might be why i don’t talk to people about my feelings or why i don’t see myself to be as good as anyone else sees me- hell, he found out that i had a crush on a girl (i’m a female) and literally took my phone from me and then yelled at me. this morning, he came home from work, looked around, and burst into my room while i was sleeping and yelled at me for not sweeping the floors like he asked me to do. it was kinda like
“HEY! WHAT WAS THE ONE THING I ASKED YOU TO DO LAST NIGHT?!”
“Clean the floors..”
“DID YOU DO IT?!”
“no..”
“Okay.” but it wasn’t like a normal tone. he used that passive aggressive tone that basically said “don’t expect anything else from me.” if you have parents like this, you know the voice. i just want him to understand that just because he is the parent and that he is the one making decisions, i should still have my feelings considered as well. never in my life has this man sat me down and asked how i was doing. you wanna know what he did when i tried to commit suicide? “So you think you have it bad? You do realize that suicide is the most selfish thing anyone can do right? Are you trying to ruin my life?!” so if suicide is selfish, what are you doing right now? i would think telling your 13 year old suicidal daughter that her only way out is “selfish” is some sort of big no no in the parenting book. but he topped it all off with “well, you gotta understand. i have never felt that way so i don’t understand how you feel.”
I felt this. This is why when I have kids I’m a try my hardest to not yell at them because I know what it feels like. Even now I can’t talk to nobody rationally when I get yelled at because I’m fighting the urge to yell back to make things worse.
Jaquaylen Forrest
I understand. Honestly when he yells at me, i want to yell back so that he might grasp how i feel. Yelling at your kids, in my opinion, is probably one of the worst things. The feeling of getting yelled at weighs on children and even though you’re “trying to teach them” it only builds up a wall and sooner or later, the parent will hit that wall and realize that they can’t go around. my dad hasn’t stopped yelling at me. that day, he went as far as to say “if these floors and everything else isn’t done, i’m gonna beat your ass when i get home. i don’t care. whether you’re asleep or not, i’ll just start swinging.” He came back a couple minutes later and said “So you’re just gonna cry about it? Really?” so i stopped giving him a reaction. i went straight faced, ignored him when i could and gave him a dry answer when i had to talk.
I'm currently going through this with my wife. She yells at my teenage daughters every day. I'm at my wits end. I'm having a nervous breakdown as I'm typing this. Good luck.
Yelling just makes everyone feel awful. It's so belittling for the person who gets yelled at and it doesn't make the person who yells feel any better. At least in my case, it can make the person who's being yelled at feel as though they're too stupid to be talked to in a normal way. As someone who's a teen and who gets yelled/cursed at by my parents from time to time, all it does is make me feel anxious, sad, and I can't focus on anything once it's happened. Like calm down this does nothing for me!!
agreed.
while I didn't grow up being yelled at, there were quite a few things that my family could have provided but were...uh "lacking" in, the result of this was at times me shedding tears simply at the idea that someone would just up and trust what I was telling them, or just thanking me, or god forbid accept an apology. I suppose it would be even worse if I would also have some louder, even more aggressive person breathing down my neck in the same house I had to live in
Somebody said that a daughter would love to marry a man who's like his father. I am not sure if that's true.
that saying goes a little different - not "love" - just do. Girls marry men who are like their fathers. Often whether they like it or not.
Ew who tf says that
Some people marry the person of the opposite sex that more resembles the bad behaviour of the respective parent sadly. It's wired in psychology.
I always feel like wanting to yell/shout back whenever that happened to me; but I decide to be better than them by not doing that 👍🏼
woah this is a great comment
Be the bigger person
Even 12 years after my dad died, I still have anger issues from his negative reinforcement.
Man, that's my fear. I was thinking it will make it go away.
I am all ready depressed and they are making it worse...they think they are doing something by yelling
My parents always yelled at my siblings and I, and I don't think it was right. Did it effect me? Yeah, I cried after it. It made me feel really weak. When I do become a parent, I won't yell.
When my parents yell at me and repeatedly tell me to hurry up to do something, I feel more like I don’t want to do what they want me to do.
I can't wait for 2024 when i can finally go to college and not hear my dad yell
POV: Your about to get in big trouble
0:28 I lost count on how many time my parents said that, but screaming loud at me
My mother is always yelling at my sister and it scares me so mich because her room is next to mine (she has no problem with it, she provocates it every day)
I know I have no right to be scared but I can't help it. They are just insulting me all the time.
yo do have a right, I know it's been two years, but would you like to talk about it? we're no therapist, but we can listen, provided we have time
Some people should not be entitled to have a child. Child-bearing should be liscensed.
i always get yelled at no matter how big or small the case maybe, no matter if i over-look something, forgot something, or don't do things in "their" timly matter (by "their" i mean i should be done with everything faster than the speed of light right after they tell me to)
and of course the next step is beating and taking things away (which doesn't go well with me (the beating part because of retaliation [runs in the dad side family] and taking things away will just find a way to get it back)
Saying “yelling is what parents have done in the past” IS NOT AN EXCUSE for people who act out on their kids.
I've tried telling my mom to stop yelling, even after she apologized and explained she only yells (as in she knows she does it but has no intention on stopping) because she's tired, cranky or something isn't going her way, but every time I tell her to stop yelling at me, she always gives me a list of why she does.
Like how I forget to clean on one day, even though I've cleaned all week and simply chose the one day she was busy to take care of myself and my mental health, or when something gets lost that I know nothing about (like something for work or something she bought herself that I had yet to see or know of), and stuff like that.
I'm basically always the scapegoat for the days she's the most busy, and every time I try to do things before she arrives back home to help her relax, she never notices and always yells at me anyways, right up until she finally eats and has her coffee. And even when I try to soothe her by asking what I can do to help her, I'm still yelled at and told to "just go"....so I end up spending every Saturday hiding in my room until she's sleepy and calm enough to be around.
I'm 23, by the way, and I'm honestly questioning if I'm the problem or if this is abuse. I want to move out so badly, but I have no money.
Wow, we have the same home life. And also, she wants me to take care of her when she gets sick or tired but get angry of me when I get sick.
@@clemntne Mothers really don't think outside themselves sometimes, huh? XD
everythin you said i can relate to im always the scape goat and everytime i try to say its not me or "talk back" they freakin yell and I just want to slap them in the face sometimes
Remember those days when your parents wouldn’t yell at you and would love you but today all of thats gone and you try to do something but it doesn’t result in anything 💀
My Mom literally screams at me for everything,She takes away my Laptop that IS MINE NOT HERS and MY PS4 and MY Tablet but she just takes them with her
I get hit and yelled at. I'm pretty sure I have depression and almost 100% certain that I have anxiety. I used to cry a lot, I did self-harm, I have suicidal thoughts 25/8, and I have panic attacks often. I am now used to having panic attacks in a way, which is more painful in my opinion. Quietly. My parents threatened to beat the heck out of me if I had panic attacks again. Recently, I had a panic attack at school because my parents won't hear me screaming in pain there, I never did tell them that happened. I considered going to the school psychologist, but I'm just too scared. I have a friend who did self-harm, but fortunately only one day and she stopped. She is currently working on getting meds, while my parents are over here telling me "It's just a phase", "It's just hormones", "You're fine, you're life is perfect you have no right to be like this. We spoil you and you do this?! We've been through war and nothing like this happened to us, so get a grip, before I give you something to cry about." I don't feel safe in my so-called 'home' anymore. Every day when school is over I hear everyone become so enthusiastic. I want to leave school but I don't want to go home. I have thought about taking my own life on the spot while seeing the things needed to do so before me and grabbing them. My first-time experiencing this was in school when my 'depression' started. I was walking towards the window and grabbed the window frame. I realized that I wasn't high enough to die from doing so, so I walked back to my seat. Another time was when I opened the fridge we keep the medicines in. I saw so many pills and grabbed one of the ones that were too strong for me. I let go of it before someone noticed, but in the few seconds I held it, I thought about overdosing. I just had one of those 'silent' panic attacks. I wish my parents would understand. I used to get emotional support from my friends, but nowadays I don't even bother asking. I hope they like what they and the world did to their 'precious baby daughter'. I might add more later. If you read all of this, thank you and sorry for wasting your time.
Edit 1: I forgot to add that if it's not one of my three best friends raising their hand in my direction, I'll instantly get into a defensive position and flinch.
I’m so sorry that you had experience all this. Hopefully you get away from them. They seriously got mad at you that you had a panic attack like what’s wrong with them. Like seriously something is wrong with your parents.
No, not their friend, their parent. Kids have to know that their parents can always be there for them, but when they do wrong, they should know it's not right.
@Emily S one of the upper-hands of growing up with some sort of inflicted trauma in an age of the internet, now that trauma doesn't have to spread through you, you can see the good and identify it from the bad online, understand that what *they* did to you isn't/shouldn't be the norm, and you can begin actively getting rid of your own infective toxicity.
Edgy teenage boy here. If you looked this up, you probably understand me. Thanks for that.
Respect your children. Your children become what you are. So be what you want them to be.
No wonder I have anger issues.
And my parents STILL question where it came from.
"How did we get here?"
When my dad yells at me I stand there and take it because I feel like if I talk back to him it will get worse. My dads anger issues scare me to the point I cry. Whenever someone else yells at me I don’t cry, but when it comes to my dad yes. My dad always tells me “You gotta stop crying all the time”. I can’t help it if his anger issues scares me. Whenever He yells at me I fear that he will smack me one day, he has not done it before but I fear he will
Yes my father threatened to slam my head repeatedly into a wall until I bled when I was in the 4th grade..
h0l0gr4m_ I’m sorry that happened to you. I hope things get better for you. Fathers should never do that stuff to there kids. It can scare me on how the world works.
Why are some humans so evil?
Panic attacks, anxiety, self-doubt, fear of success, social-anxiety, pressure, depression, afraid to say no, afraid to live life, suicidal thoughts, fear of failure, nervousness, getting startled, over apologizing, starting over, and trying to please people who are incapable of happiness. One would rather die then spend the rest of thier life trying to meet impossible expectations.
Yelling traumatizes people.
cheekyoongi That is called a zero sum game. My mom did the same. “You can tell me anything. I just want honesty.” She would say. That is a lie and a half I told myself. Adult estrangement is not abuse, toxicity is.
Yelling is useless when you think about it.
my parents have been yelling and cussing and used to hit me occasionally and it really fucked me up. I don't feel comfortable talking to them about anything and it's definitely contributed to my depression.
I’m so sorry. If they abused you, you should move out and try to get a job and not to talk to them for good and if they do want to talk tell them about all the experiences and trauma you had when you were a child. You shouldn’t have to go through this. I hope you are doing well now
@@aliassem1035 i forgot about this comment. i’m living on my own now at 18 👍
@@Afroninja12 good for you I wish you the best!!!
Children are not pet or toys you can just yell at and hit. Children have just as many feelings as the parents, and they are just as valid. Being a child is hard enough, don’t make it any harder.
If it was true that when you’ve lost your temper you lost your argument, My parent would have lost every argument we have ever had.
This hits me particularly hard. My mom always just screamed at me and it really fucked with my head growing up.
My parents never apoligis to me when they yell at me Not even when im in my rooms cry loudly with an Open door when they hear IT they Just Close the door
im sorry
my dad won't stop yelling at me when I don't respond to him in .5 seconds
It’s sad that I’m not a teenager anymore and my father still yells even louder. He doesn’t care about my feelings 💔. It’s really sad and I’m typing this while crying like why do I have to deal with this for so long. My self esteem is really bad and I don’t think that I can love him really like I suppose to do. I’m not even brave enough to commit suicide
I sayed ok to my dad and he yelled at me for saying OK again
literally my dad.
So, if I am a parent, I guess I can say this to my child if he/she did something bad: I am very disappointed at you. What you did is wrong. You really should not do that.
I guess I can tell my child to go to his/her room to reflect on what she has done.
Yeah my parents yelled at me earlier because I poured too much cold drink for my brother. They could have just asked me to remove some, but no they started yelling at me and saying I did it on purpose.
They are as emotionally mature as children.
Actually I’ve worked with five year old children and those children were more emotionally mature than them. They could be calmed down by talking about their emotions and what was upsetting them. If I did that with my parents they’d yell at me for patronising them.
True..I always help my parents to do their work like help cook,wash dishes and clothes..and they doesn't care about me at all they just keep on yelling at me like I didn't even help them with anything and I hate it..I kinda feel like I need to cut myself..all the yelling I got everyday every second made me feel depression I always try to impress them with my hard work I tried to help them everyday because they have to go to work everyday and came home late.. I understand they felt tired and thats why I always help them with home work but all I got was yelling they doesn't care if they hurt my feelings and I don't want to try to speak up for myself because I know they will yell at me even more..so I just shut my mouth and hold my tears until they leave my room...
Dont harm yourself. Youre letting them win.
My parents are constantly verbally abusive towards me and they always deny it and then expect an apology FROM ME after I literally did nothing. They always start fights for no reason and blame it on me. I try and get out of the house as much as a can but it's not enough and I can't take it anymore. I've contemplated suicide many times and they never listen and always victimize themselves. I never peeled loved in my home and I don't think I have anything to I've for anymore because they (and my siblings) always tell me they wish I was aborted.
Praying your still here bro this stuff sucks man
my mum screams at me for no reason whatsoever, she will call me useless, worthless, tell me she doesn't care about me, tell me she will put me in care, tell me she will cut all contact with me, she doesn't fell empathy, she doesn't accept that she is wrong, I am only 13. what do I do?
my parents never apologize .
Neither do mine. They think they’re perfect and blame me for everything. They actively try to suppress me independence and make my more reliant on them and other people then complain that I’m not independent enough or going to make it in the real world.
I wish I could send this to my parents
Me too but they won’t listen
WARNING: VENT COMMENT, you're allowed to ignore this, I'm not abused, but I have been yelled at.
In response to me making a mistake, my mom has yelled over and over about what I did was wrong. I know it was wrong, I know that I need to improve, I don't need it hammered in.. It makes me uncontrollably cry for about 30 minutes without being able to stop in front of her in moments that she has yelled at me. I'm hyper sensitive, I'm fearful of being yelled at for mistakes, so I am prone to trying to run from my problems or do them on my own without consulting others for help in fear of being yelled at for making that mistake, the longer I wait the more I run from my problems, and then I'm asked why I didn't ask for help and waited so long. It's uncommon for her to yell at me, once a month or less usually, but in moments where she has the uncontrollable crying was awful, the helplessness and knowing that whatever I say I probably won't get her to leave and calm down or see my point of view. She has PTSD (I had to overhear a conversation to learn that), depression, and anxiety, she's also prone to migraines, not a good combo. If I make a mistake, I just have to hope she's not in a really bad mood or having a migraine. It more or less causes fear for me, and uncontrollable crying + social anxiety is a bad combo, I don't like the self induced shame I feel for being unable to stop ugly crying. Otherwise my mother is really good, she has good views on the world and tries to be a good parent, but her major flaw in parenting is yelling at me. I love her, but she's just so assertive sometimes. I think she's insecure about others stabbing her in the back or manipulating or walking over her due to past experiences, she seems like she used to be shy and kind of a pushover. Sorry for venting, again I love my mother, I wouldn't ask for another, but even though she's become more understanding, yelling has given me problems. About 80% of days are perfectly fine though, I'm usually happy and I don't have depression, I don't self harm, I don't have major issues like a certain two family members. I love life but yelling sucks, if you yell at your kids as punishment please stop. - from a teenager
MORE VENTING (to make myself feel better :>)
I'm not the one with the issues in this family, my grandmother and mother are. Grandmother was abused as a child by mother and took blame for siblings to defend them, mother was abused by my father physically and probably sexually at 1? - 19 (age she had me), life is cruel sometimes.
mom: Yelling at me
4 year old me: starts crying
mom: still yelling at me
mom: yelling at me
Me now: Don't give the reaction she expects
mom: gives up a few seconds later
Literally cannot be my self or do what i want or **need** to do without my parents yelling at me
I hate that, i keep thinking that i’ll just answer back to protect myself, but when i’m actually in the moment i cant do it, then my siblings make fun of me for getting shouted at..
When I was young my dad never yelled at me or my older sister my mom passed away the day I was born 20yrs ago when I told my dad I was pregnant and he always treated me like his princess he said everything will be alright he passed away on Christmas and I'm a mother to a three year old girl and two twins my first daughter's dad broke up with me in the hospital and my twins dad we were going to get married passed away in a car accident days before I was giving birth I had the twins a week ago and it's very very difficult
JD812 stfu and learn some respect
Hope your doing well
@ is 😐
@@averylonelysalmon "not saying I am any better" you say? that is the beginning of admirable improvement, you know, you just have to consciously take a few steps back and correct yourself once you identify it happening
When I was young, like really young, my dad had anger problems. I mean, he still does, but he's improved a lot in controlling his emotions. Anyway, he'd yell a lot at me. It took a massive toll on me. So big that even to this day, more than a decade later, I'm still afraid of him. I love him. He loves me. We do our best. He understands that he caused horrible trauma.
*bookmarks this video to prepare for when I have kids in 20 years*
Don’t worry, you and your kids will live with robots
Literally she yells at me for no fucking reason. Then makes up more reason to yell. Then says I’m yelling when I’m literally just talking.
Parents need to understand that they are not in control. I have a 15 yo daughter...and she is completely free to make her own choices without any punishment or consequences from me.
I have never told her to do anything, she does it if she wants to. Like...she hates cleaning...so I don't make her....I clean everything!
If we have a disagreement about something...we both sit down and talk about it. I never get angry or annoyed, I want to know what she has to say. And MOST times I side with her.
Whatever her choice is, IF I can fulfill that choice for her, I give it to her....its not my place to make choices for her!
I have the ability to bottle up my emotions and I usually bite my tongue but after like 3 months of putting up with it I yell back and they send me to my room, take my phone, shut out the power to my room and I’m just expected to behave now!!! Wtf!!!
I guess my parents loves me but they don't know how to love a kid rightfully.
My parents just keeps shouting at me for no reason sometimes
On god they ain’t really got nothing going on in their lives
When my dad yells at me I feel stress and angry
i feel you
i always feel depressed over my parents bc they yell at me alot just bc i cry and yeh
My mom yell at me EVERY FCKING DAY,and she didn't even say a "I'm sorry"
i cant have a simple conversation with any family member without ending it with me in tears, am i broken or something
My parents yell at me over little things. My grades have sunk and all that and they get in my face and yell at me. I get angry and sad and then they try to joke with me a few minutes after but my mood was already stressed and destroyed. I never have been one to say things about how I feel nor how things affect me and I write it out. I once wrote out my feelings towards them and my dad almost found it. It was also in my “suicidal” journal and I just... when my brother found the journal and handed it to my dad cus it was a diArY and my brother wanted to read it.. I almost broke down in front of my parents, breathing heavily and shaking. When my dad gave it to me I bolted my ass upstairs after and just shut down completely. I was on a call with someone too.
I'm 19 nd I hate to scold kids and to see kids getting scolded for simple reason because I know I hate it
My parents favor my other siblings more than me. I understand that it’s hard to deal with me at times because of my mental state, but it would be nice if they smiled at me or even hugged me once in a while, probably even told me they were proud of me? ;w;
Never ever yell at your kids or your wife its wrong to do that
Today I spoke to my mom confused because she misunderstood me when I was talking about a road looking small and she misheard some random sentence and then asked me if I was listening to a true crime podcast so I said "What? No... What does that have to do with what I said?" And she said she didn't like the way I spoke to her these last couple days. She said she doesn't know where my attitude has been coming from, yet I 've not spoken to her much these last couple days. She then asks if I'm acting this way because I'm going to my house near my best friend/cousins (whos mom she has a decade worth of hate for, all because of self confidence issues and a couple misunderstandings) and I then got mad and proceeded to be a bit more rude with my tone because she blames my best friend for no reason. I barely get to hang out with her but when shes over if my mom senses even a bit of anger in my voice about something she does then she threatens to never let my friend come over again. Shes already banned me from going over to their house for the night and unnofically banned me from hanging out there too. I'm so sad because I travel full time in an RV so all my other friends feel like part time friends but I tell her everything that happens and I trust her so much and we talk like 5 hours a day on video calls but I never get to see her in person or do anything fun with her anymore unless its at a family event and its during the 1 month we're actually in the same state ughhh
The Bible actually says to not cause anger in your children. Meaning not to disrespect them, this in return causes anger.
In my household, you can’t say anything in your side of an argument without being called a smartass it’s hell
My dad is already loud enough. I dont think I want to show him this video…
My dad wouldn't stop yelling at me tonight
We should ALL be like a proton...
Always POSITIVE!!
Everytime I use to goof around with my peers in front of my mom she would start yelling at me and getting mad at me. I mean it was understandable because back then I copied behavior just to get attention and because I had trouble making friends, but everytime I did something funny that was harmless she would get very mad at me, and everytime I spoke or made gestures she would say WHY DO YOU SPEAK LIKE THIS WHY DO YOU MAKE GESTURES LIKE THIS?! I started feeling controlled like I couldn’t act or say anything and that I’d had to rely on my mom on what to say and how to say it, I basically relied everything on my mom of what to do or what not to do so my mom wouldn’t get mad and yelled at me. Also, everytime I misbehaved a little or forgot to do a chore or even at random moments she would bring up something from that past that she didn’t like that I did. But now, everything is much better, I was diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome a few months ago and now my mom understands me, I told her about how she made me feel in the past, she said that it was not her intention of her making me feel controlled, she was just “trying” to correct me or “help” me but I guess she sometimes “lost control” and yelled at me because she thought I was just immature. But Anyways, everything is better now.
My mom yells at least once every single day.
Grew up with my mom screaming at me and my brother and sister...all three of us now have very low self-esteem...
my mom should watch this
Hearing loss
Tw: SH and probably more,
My experience
My father had always shouted at me and my older sister pretty much anytime that we made a mistake, whether it was playing with our food (in our younger ages) or other small mistakes. He would sometimes not want to shout in a public place or just got too frustrated so he would slap/hit us "gently" instead. I eventually learned how to just 'tune out' of the argument and completely ignore their shouting while still responding to them in the manner they wanted. Then after a build up of stress, anxiety, and getting shouted at almost everyday I resorted to SH which my father than found out while pulling my sleeves up because I refused too. He had a pretty bad reaction from it and said something along the lines of "If i can shout at you what do you want me to do, hit you?" I then tried to stop SH and/or hide it more thoroughly untill I managed to stop the long periods of times. Although he has changed and tries his best not to shout or threaten its effected me a lot more than they know
I wish it never happens to anyone
I'm not a problematic child, not at all, but my family treated me like I am one, whenever I do things right like cleaning my room, my toilet and take out the garbage, they were NEVER there to see me doing it, infact they never praised me for it. But when they see me at my worst, like if i do mistakes or if i miss a task to do, they are ALWAYS the first people to witness it and find a way to yell at me as if they have every reason to, they call me "lazy'' "useless'' "stupid" and so on.
The only emotion I ever got from them is that they are narcisistic, angry and likes to yell a lot, never have I ever seen them try to talk to me without yelling once, they are that bad. Look I get it, "This is their way to show care, so at least show respect, appreciate it"*---- no, it's not, even if it is, I STRONGLY disagree with it, it's just wrong, parents are supposed to be fun to be around, right? You know the kinds of parent who relates to their own child? Showing empathy for example and ONLY yell when it's necessary.
If you're going to be a parent, PLEASE, understand your own childen and help him, help him like how your helping yourself and please... No yelling.
Dude i loomed this up because my dad just yelled at me untill i cried and tben yelled at me some more at me for crying
maybe parents could’ve just talked to us and still be reasonable, instead of yelling, pointing and slapping us (idk if your parents do that, cause mine does) Occasionally she calls us bad names like ‘dumb’, and ‘stupid’. I still love her, but I also hate her. I don’t know how to think about my mom- she just yells and whatnot. Dad is fine, sometimes he’ll but not that much, so I’m cool with him. The only things yelling teaches the kid is that their worthless, and can’t stand up for others (since sometimes they can’t stand up for the,selves when they get yelled at.)
*Parents, put yourself in the kids shoes and see how you are acting. Reconsider, parents. :)*
See my dad needs to see this, but he would just ignore it.