I heard Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo say “the covenant of life supersedes the covenant of marriage”, and therefore if your life is in danger, it’s ok to leave because you have to be alive to be married; that liberated me, I think Jesus died so that I don’t have too; we have to be Christlike but we are still NOT THE Christ! We also have to stand before the Christ and judgement day, and we will not cut it harboring bitterness, resentment, ill feeling and rage, which you will, because you stayed
I was just thinking the same thing as I'm listening! She needs to contact a domestic violence hotline for local DV agencies she can get in touch with to begin walking through a safety plan familiar with her state's laws. I know the fear and there are many layers to leaving, it's not easy especially with young children involved.
@teecee1678 as a licensed mental health provider who works with DV survivors, you are correct! A safety plan needs to be well thought out and executed. 🙏🏾
V kudos to you ! So proud of you 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾you did the right think Only we women who have been in such relationships and open to stand on business and protect ourselves and our children who innocent bystanders and divorce Use wisdom lafies🙏🏽
I agree with V and the Bible says if your husband or wife cheats you can Leave them and no Woman Deserves to Get Beat. I don't agree with him at all his acting like she should Stay In It. No NO Sir
Shannon was off on V's story. She has forgiven him and divorced him. Her husband went outside the marriage. He broke the covenant, and that is grounds for divorce just on that. Also, God did not bring that together. God does not lead us to spouses that drive us away from him. A lot of the relationships we get into is because of our own doing. V did the right thing. Forgive and move on.
Very nice job consistently redirecting the conversation back to the callers issues. You can tell you both did your best to stay focused, help the callers, and give them feedback. Great job Ryan and Tyshaun!
V thank you for your testimony ❤ I’m glad you fought for your marriage and most importantly prioritize the safety of yourself and your children & left . God will not turn his back on you because you are his daughter 🫂Stay encouraged
No, no, and no…I totally agree with the caller “V”, he was way off base. You can love people from a distance and you can forgive people and still not be in partnership with them. Forgiveness is for you, not the other person.
I had to take a break and stop listening. This is too triggering. Forgiveness does NOT equal reconciliation and this is exactly why women end up dead or so broken they can’t function. This is spiritual abuse at its finest. V thank you for sharing your testimony. You were SPOT on and well within your right to leave biblically. I commend you for staying so calm on this call. 🙏🏼💗
This was a hard watch. Shannon needs to listen to his wife she brings balance. The route he went down was not fitting to the subject, lack of empathy, compassion and accountability for people who put spouses through this mess. Literally placed the whole responsibility on the spouse needing to forgive and be Christ like. When even the word gives a a way out of marriage for adultery. Some times don’t try to be deep, just be human.
I was in a marriage dealing with a husband that is struggling with mental health issues, and we went to 3 different counselors he even went to a physiatrist, however you have to take the medicine and do the work, if a person refuses to do the work than God is not calling you to stay in a marriage where there is no peace period.
This episode is hard for me to watch because I feel like misinformation was given and Shannon wasn’t listening to comprehend but to respond. Shirley completely understood what V was saying and Shannon cut her off. In a sense, he did the same thing V’s ex husband would do. Use the Bible to correct and/or control her.
Sister Di! I can relate to your story being abused by a religious man is hell. I almost died because I was told I need to forgive and pray for my husband and stay in an abusive. I believe praying comes with wisdom. Protecting yourself and your children as Christian woman does not mean you have not forgiven your abuser.
Extend forgiveness and if the spouse is physically, verbally, emotionally, and financially abusive and Refuses to get help, get out, whether kids are involved or not. You can't be the only one doing the work. Now you can pray, fast, all that in a safe, secure separate space.
Dear V. My son isn't talking to me today because I stayed. He says I caused him to grow up in a warzone. Only us women must forgive, and we lose every time. I am tired. The church is equally abusive sometimes.
This is tackled in the movie that's coming out now "Exhibiting Forgiveness". Mothers need to do what's best for themselves and if not them, their kids.
Yup my marriage is causing strain on me and my son's relationship too and his mental health and how I want him to grow up to be a decent man will not happen keeping him in toxicity
@@filmadcamp1512 yeah at this point, I am. I find myself crying everyday over a man who just doesn't give a fuck and I have no one to turn to.. Who married me for all the wrong reasons and now that we argue everyday something I took my children our of from the last relationship, this relationship is worst because it's my marriage an it's effecting all the children in the house and it's sickening!
She has probably been through alot with him and he responds in a dismissive manner. What if the guy never changes. 10yrs? 20yrs? 30yrs? You keep holding on and being christ-like. We can't all be Mrs. Shanon
Forgive does not mean stay. God does not have abuse in store for us period. God is not the creator of chaos or confusion and abuse is a result of confusion. You can forgive and walk away
Ppl speak on marriages as if all marriages are ordained by God but ppl get into some marriages without consulting God at all. God does not intend for anyone to stay in abusive situations.
Sorry SHANNON is SOOO WRONG on this; he needs to read this scripture again: Luk 17:3 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother trespasses against you, rebuke him. And IF HE REPENTS, forgive him. Luk 17:4 And if he trespasses against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turns again to you, saying, I REPENT , you shall forgive him. - WHAT DOES REPENT MEANS?….please be careful here folks! I’m so disappointed-
I was so glad to hear that young woman speak on forgiveness. We are not Christ. We are pressing towards the mark in that pressing there is responsibility for your actions. I think we need to introduce integrity if you have none and you don’t have the ability of being remorseful or repent, what are we forgiving , a habit that is dangerous down low situations ,men are sleeping with men and coming back to their wives giving them diseases. How do you forgive that ??? other then prayer and understanding that you have to look out for yourself ,,, how do you live with somebody who is reprobating their mind and you keep forgetting .I’m a survivor thank God I made it.
His advice is horrifying. Forgiveness does not mean let him beat me, kill me, traumatize my children. His wife doesn't even agree with him. No the Bible doesn't change but it doesn't say that what forgiveness is.
For women facing situations like Vee and Trice: Forgiveness DOES NOT mean staying. Abuse and adultery are recognized in the Bible as grounds for divorce. Don’t let anyone manipulate you into believing you’re obligated to stay in an abusive situation-read the Bible for yourself. Jesus taught forgiveness, yes, but He never said to stay and endure abuse or unfaithfulness. "Turning the other cheek" means choosing not to repay evil with evil, not accepting ongoing harm. ALSO, don't tell the abuser you're leaving, especially if it's physical abuse. Silently make your plans and they'll get the message when you're no longer there. Someone else can hand them the divorce papers.
Shannon was not right in saying a person should stay in an abusive marriage for the sake of forgiveness. You can forgive AND leave. Children have died and women have lost their life. Not all forgiveness leads to restoration. Use wisdom! Let just think not everyone will choose Christ in the end. God doesn’t even force a relationship when someone breaks covenant. Why should a spouse stay for an unrepentant heart? If you’re in this situation give your spouse to the Lord and surrender yourself. Talk to him daily to lead and guide you into his will. God will give you the wisdom, community and love to know whether you should leave or not. Go to God first. Some spouses change and some don’t. But you stay with the Lord and you remain holy ❤ 1 Peter 3:1 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
People also forget that scripture even says in Ephesians 5:25 "husbands love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it." Any man who decided to physically abuse his wife is going against that and not treating his wife with care. So, for safety purposes, a woman being abused should not stay.
I’m glad my Dad didn’t leave my Mom. I’m glad we as a family stayed together and stayed by her side. It wasn’t easy and many times I didn’t think she would make it but SHE DID!! We all made it together on the other side and so much grateful for it.
I’m so disappointed in that male’s guest advice he seemed to have a bias perspective based off his current medical situation and not wanting his wife to leave him. The Bible does say you can leave if there is adultery meaning cheating but please research it for yourself I am a baby Christian
Yes, that comment did catch me off guard as well which initiated me doing some further research. The Bible does explain this in Mark 10:2-5 but basically adultery IS grounds for divorce ,however it also states that Moses wrote this law because of us having a hardened heart . Now I can understand his perspective. GOD requires that we forgive so that we in return can be forgiven by him . With a harded heart it is impossible to say that you have truly forgiven someone.
By the way, I do not support abuse or adultery. In his defense, I think that’s what he was trying to explain. I also believe situations like this, having the ability to “forgive someone 70×7”comes in. It takes a lot to be a true child of God . But we all fall short.
The Bible does not say to divorce. It give grounds for divorce in that circumstance, those are not the same thing. God hates divorce so if people can find a point to work it out, God gets all the glory
THIS IS SO SAD….life is so short to waste so much time in dysfunctional behaviors. Many are trauma bonding with No healthy tools to manage a marriage out of crisis…life is guaranteed to bring storms and men will try to drink, cheat, abuse, etc, there way out of the storm….everyone is damaged in the long run and we pass it on to the kids…what a sad cycle.
I love the wisdom of married couple in the group discussion but, Shannon speaks about Jesus’ sacrifice for us. So the young lady should be willing to put up with whatever but, just the guest caller before her(V) he wants the caller to get weapon. I’m confused. Maybe this is me not picking up what Shannon is putting down because the Bible also says thou shall not kill also. I don’t want to trivialize marriage in anyway but, Jesus didn’t say to his disciples when they entered the town and people reject you. He didn’t say to keep on trying to convince the people to believe, he said to dust off your feet and keep moving. This is a heavy one. I commend (V) for the peace that God put in her heart. You can tell from the way she is speaking.
I’m praying for Trice and her babies. You can’t fail at anything that’s already finished sis! Abuse is something you should never ever get used to. Take you and your babies, go through what ever you have to go through to get out of that. God will be with you the whole way just pray and call on God please but MOVE babe! Don’t be still in that, be diligent in moving away from an abusive man!
100%%%% he’s missing a very important part- GOD laid down the law for punishment of evil. Anything considered abuse most often is a legal and public safety issue- and God makes allowances- The SPIRIT of the law means NOT only adultery but things on that same level of infidelity! SHANNON is nice but NUTS on this.
V...thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your testimony. Only the peace in your heart knows what God has/have for you to do for your family. Sometimes we have to make a choice today and continue to pray for what we want while using wisdom and discernment, Keeping you and your family in my prayers
What is Shannon talking about cause I am confused. The line is drawn at abuse and adultery as well as abandonment, and that's reasons according to the Bible. Yes, I do t think most churches do well in handling abuse and domestic violence in marriages, they often leave women feeling ashamed , unloved, hopeless and like second class citizens
For the x files case (Mike), it would be helpful for him to seek more spiritual guidance in this matter. His wife may need deliverance from some evil spirits working within her. Their situation is deeper than what I believe was touched in this segment.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean staying in the marriage. Staying in the marriage doesn’t equal to forgiveness either; how many married couples hate and resent each other?!! AND, only those who REPENT can be saved by our Lord Jesus!!! Who would the sister forgive him if he is not repent to God???
Ryan, gave a great example. Christ and the veteran in his example, sacrificed their lives for an overall good, to save lives. How is a woman sacrificing her life or the lives of children for a man’s abuse, his sexual indiscretions, his addiction, etc. for an overall good? This goes for men accepting foolishness and abuse from women as well. Forgiveness is not the same as granting someone full access to your life. You can forgive and decrease level of access or prevent access altogether. God forgives and loves all of us, but every loved human will not gain access to Heaven.
Deut 30:19 I have set before you life and death… choose life!!! Matthew 19:9 divorce is allowed if adultery is committed!! Does this guy know about these texts??
V is on point! This guy is over using Christ like! We are given discernment in forgiveness as well. We don't need to die on the cross to be Christ like... Jesus already died for our sins we don't need to do that for others. Some people abuse the word or maybe misinterpret in a way to oppress others in their wrong doings.
Also the advice given to Trice as far as you can’t make someone do the work is the same thing they should’ve said to the man with the depressive/suicidal wife. He has done everything that he can do, you can not help someone that refuses to help themself. In no way is he being selfish if he decides he can’t take anymore. At this point he must do what’s best for himself and his daughter.
I am a minister of the gospel and this was very hard to watch. Shannon was COMPLETELY OFF! SIR LISTEN TO YOUR WIFE! V I AM SOOOO PROUD OF YOU!!! And speaking as a prophet of the most high, he was definitely not connected spiritually speaking. He seems to like to dominate conversations.
Luk 17:3 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother trespasses against you, rebuke him. And IF HE REPENTS, forgive him. Luk 17:4 And if he trespasses against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turns again to you, saying, I REPENT , you shall forgive him. - WHAT DOES REPENT MEANS?….please be careful here folks!
Shirley is incredibly patient with her husband, and it’s truly beautiful… however, I don’t think Sharron was quite ready to come onto this show. He’s projecting a lot, and you can see on his face sometimes at his disbelief of the advice Shirley is giving to marriages about leaving, separating etc. as if he thinks Shirley will leave/separate him. He’s shifting a lot of conversations back to himself and his processing. It’s uncomfortable to watch if im being honest. May God grant him with the peace, and the comfort during this hard time for him, his wife, and their families. Give them your Joy to build strength and endurance. In Jesus name I pray, Amen 🙏🏾🤍
V was very eloquent and calm in her response. Hope she heals truly❤. The same Bible does say you can divorce if there's infidelity in the marriage. Self love is a thing. Love others as you love yourself. If the man in question is not loving or respecting you as V said, how low of a self esteem do you have, to force yourself onto someone who is showing he doesn't respect or love you?The ex- husband wasn't even trying to fix anything. I just think Shannon is one of those men that put women through shit then expect forgiveness and not being left. He lucky he has someone that hasn't left hin after alladat coz not a lot of people are being christ-like out here. You can forgive and separate yourself from the mess. Love people from a far. There are consenquences.
The Blind is a good testimonial movie. It’s a true story about Phil and Kay Robertson’s marriage and salvation. Phil was an alcoholic which led to abuse and infidelity, so Kay left with the children. Through the grace and power of God, their lives and marriage were restored. They have a great testimony! Everyone’s story is different, but God’s Word remains. We must move with wisdom and obey and trust God’s Word and Spirit.
Tht is great you and your wife were able to work through the hard things. you two are a great example that marriages can work through hard things, however everybodys situation and circumstance is different. God wants all of us to be happy period. I appreciate V and you definaetly exemplified Christ like behaviour with your attitude. Sis, I was in a very similar situation and I got a restraining order and it was granted, and my husband has never put his hands on me.
I love this conversation because awareness is necessary. 1) Sharese needs a protective order before she changes locks and says her husband can't come back to the home. 2) With Vee...the bible says you can divorce when infidelity/adultery is involved. When safety is a concern, leaving should aways be an option. We have to read the whole bible. The abuser is subject to the scripture that instructs against harming others. I love Vee's example of David. Sometimes the consequences of us NOT praying about whether God approves of a mate and properly observing their fruit, is divorce.
This episode actually pissed me off. You can 100% forgive without reconciliation, especially if someone is being abused. Like V said, too many people have died because of accepting abuse. Shannon's insight on this topic is wild and very legalistic. As a Christian, draw the line at abuse, please!
Caught on the Replay. In regards to the X-Files, I empathize with this family. As one who has battled episodes of depression on and off for years, I cannot say what another should do because everyone is impacted in this case. She is dealing with grief and that will never go away. However, one should want to get help to better cope. Its hard while in the mist of an episode, so having someone who truly cares about you, admit you into an institution for the help you need is imperative, especially if dealing with suicidal ideations. Until you have experienced that type of grief or extreme sadness, you will never fully understand. I pray his wife finds the strength to pull through for her daughter. There are medications that help tremendously and when coupled with therapy is like night and day. I made the decision to ride this thing called life until the wheels fall off. When you choose to live and process those feelings and trauma, life gets so much better.
@@SonarLegend-gj1yo definitely agree... God doesn't want us to suffer especially with our spouses. He tells us to be equally yoked. He doesn't bless marriages that he didn't put together. I totally agree that we should be careful about who we listen to.
Baby he said “if I didn’t have all y’all in the universe” aka all the humans on earth who prayed for him. Not new age at all. The universe was and still is a word with a specific meaning that is not related to new age. It has been twisted to mock God so yea I get how you’d walk away with this. Listen again my love!
There's absolutely no way I could counsel someone to stay in n emotionally, physically, any sort of abusive relationship for the sake of my faith. God did not call me to live a life being tormented. The segment with V made me uncomfortable . Its giving the church I grew up in that counseled all bad in the name of scripture, not considering safety and the law. Ion like it. S/O to V for being level headed, well spoken, forgiving, AND DIVORCING!
Shannon did himself such a disservice by not listening to this woman because now I’m wondering what type of advice he’s been giving to the couples he counsels?I fully understand what he is trying to say but his context is wrong ! Also, don’t cry about what the Bible says regarding forgiveness and not also preach about the ONE reason God did give permission for divorce …infidelity ! Which is what this man did and more ! I found myself getting triggered by this man but V really did have a great rebuttal ! Overall I enjoy a challenging conversation and am glad we are able to have them but when it comes to forgiveness vs safety…ehhhh idk
Bruhhhh!! They came to the shop and she paid for her husband spa treatment ❤ she said she seen me online and she was saying she and her husband was married along time and more
No one chooses sickness of any kind especially mental illness… Mike needs to exhaust all means to help his sick wife… in marriage you can’t just bail out. Marriage is about the sacrifice. He needs to check his states commitment for mental illness…
Sometimes when people say give to God we don’t tell them what that insist of so they still worry. We all are made from God so we all individually belong to God. We can choose to be selfish and fall into our desires which is contrary to Gods will or we can do what God made us for and be with him in spirit. I learned that God is apart of me and when I take him out of my life I fall into my own desires. God is the lively hood of our existence and I’m upset that Marriage is idolized as validation instead of a covenant. We have to be with him or we will make relationships into this needed thing to be alive. We don’t own anyone even in Marriage. We have to divide ourselves from people and understand that all of us are individuals so when things happen in our relationship we can not feel as though another persons actions is a reflection of our identity and get caught up in depression but understand that a persons actions is due to their own individual struggles so we can pray through love and understand and not for control over the other person. Prayer is an action of love and understanding and not control and validation.
Two reasons The Word of God allows divorce Adultery Abandonment.. when a person turns away from God, no longer a believer. You also have to be wise and God is a forgiving God.
I disagree with what he is saying. I understand his wife is battling depression. However if she decides not to heal herself than what is he to do? She is responsible for her healing.
Shannon, forgiveness doesn't mean you stay in a an emotional and mental abusive relationship. God wants us to have peace, he wants us to pursue his kingdon and win others over the Christ, and if we stay in a toxic marriage, our energy is drained, and we are not even able to focus on the things God is calling us to do then you remove yourself. I am not saying God cannot mend the marriage and bring us back together, however you move on and if it was meant to be God will bring us back together period.
V ...I absolutely love you! I 💯 back your decision and your Wisdom. There are not enough people who stand on their conversations as you did🙏🏽🙏🏽❤️
I heard Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo say “the covenant of life supersedes the covenant of marriage”, and therefore if your life is in danger, it’s ok to leave because you have to be alive to be married; that liberated me, I think Jesus died so that I don’t have too; we have to be Christlike but we are still NOT THE Christ!
We also have to stand before the Christ and judgement day, and we will not cut it harboring bitterness, resentment, ill feeling and rage, which you will, because you stayed
@@ckks0nyoutube Oh that's good... that's real good!
Shannon missed it completely. V I’m so proud of you for choosing to you and your children. You are so courageous!
The advice that Shannon gave to the women in abusive situations has caused many women, children and family members to loose their lives.
@@sfr9722 agreed
I was just thinking the same thing as I'm listening! She needs to contact a domestic violence hotline for local DV agencies she can get in touch with to begin walking through a safety plan familiar with her state's laws. I know the fear and there are many layers to leaving, it's not easy especially with young children involved.
@teecee1678 as a licensed mental health provider who works with DV survivors, you are correct! A safety plan needs to be well thought out and executed. 🙏🏾
V kudos to you ! So proud of you 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾you did the right think
Only we women who have been in such relationships and open to stand on business and protect ourselves and our children who innocent bystanders and divorce
Use wisdom lafies🙏🏽
I agree with V and the Bible says if your husband or wife cheats you can Leave them and no Woman Deserves to Get Beat. I don't agree with him at all his acting like she should Stay In It. No NO Sir
Shannon was off on V's story. She has forgiven him and divorced him. Her husband went outside the marriage. He broke the covenant, and that is grounds for divorce just on that. Also, God did not bring that together. God does not lead us to spouses that drive us away from him. A lot of the relationships we get into is because of our own doing. V did the right thing. Forgive and move on.
You can forgive and still leave.
@@jodyrose7425 this.
Very nice job consistently redirecting the conversation back to the callers issues. You can tell you both did your best to stay focused, help the callers, and give them feedback. Great job Ryan and Tyshaun!
V thank you for your testimony ❤ I’m glad you fought for your marriage and most importantly prioritize the safety of yourself and your children & left . God will not turn his back on you because you are his daughter 🫂Stay encouraged
No, no, and no…I totally agree with the caller “V”, he was way off base. You can love people from a distance and you can forgive people and still not be in partnership with them. Forgiveness is for you, not the other person.
I’m proud of you Vee. This man is out of balance. Stay strong Sis
I had to take a break and stop listening. This is too triggering. Forgiveness does NOT equal reconciliation and this is exactly why women end up dead or so broken they can’t function. This is spiritual abuse at its finest. V thank you for sharing your testimony. You were SPOT on and well within your right to leave biblically. I commend you for staying so calm on this call. 🙏🏼💗
Well said!👏🏾
This was a hard watch. Shannon needs to listen to his wife she brings balance. The route he went down was not fitting to the subject, lack of empathy, compassion and accountability for people who put spouses through this mess. Literally placed the whole responsibility on the spouse needing to forgive and be Christ like. When even the word gives a a way out of marriage for adultery. Some times don’t try to be deep, just be human.
I was in a marriage dealing with a husband that is struggling with mental health issues, and we went to 3 different counselors he even went to a physiatrist, however you have to take the medicine and do the work, if a person refuses to do the work than God is not calling you to stay in a marriage where there is no peace period.
Vvvvvvvvv!! Love your wisdom and perspective! Stay blessed!
This episode is hard for me to watch because I feel like misinformation was given and Shannon wasn’t listening to comprehend but to respond. Shirley completely understood what V was saying and Shannon cut her off. In a sense, he did the same thing V’s ex husband would do. Use the Bible to correct and/or control her.
This was exactly my take too. Shirley could have brought so much balance to the conversation if only he let her chime in as well.
Most men don't listen to comprehend. I say things to my husband and he'll take my words and change them to become victim. It's stressful and draining.
@@latoyadykes5010 My ex fiancée used to do that
@@kylasimmons Yeah these ninjas are beyond broken! Bleeding on me ain't the word, more like hemorrhaging on me and gets pleasure out of my pain!!
Sister Di! I can relate to your story being abused by a religious man is hell. I almost died because I was told I need to forgive and pray for my husband and stay in an abusive. I believe praying comes with wisdom. Protecting yourself and your children as Christian woman does not mean you have not forgiven your abuser.
Extend forgiveness and if the spouse is physically, verbally, emotionally, and financially abusive and Refuses to get help, get out, whether kids are involved or not. You can't be the only one doing the work. Now you can pray, fast, all that in a safe, secure separate space.
Dear V. My son isn't talking to me today because I stayed. He says I caused him to grow up in a warzone. Only us women must forgive, and we lose every time. I am tired. The church is equally abusive sometimes.
Whew! Felt this comment, Luv!
This is tackled in the movie that's coming out now "Exhibiting Forgiveness". Mothers need to do what's best for themselves and if not them, their kids.
Yup my marriage is causing strain on me and my son's relationship too and his mental health and how I want him to grow up to be a decent man will not happen keeping him in toxicity
@@latoyadykes5010 Leave sis.
@@filmadcamp1512 yeah at this point, I am. I find myself crying everyday over a man who just doesn't give a fuck and I have no one to turn to.. Who married me for all the wrong reasons and now that we argue everyday something I took my children our of from the last relationship, this relationship is worst because it's my marriage an it's effecting all the children in the house and it's sickening!
This poor lady is looking at her husband saying under her breath, Lord help this man.
I was thinking the same thing lol
She has probably been through alot with him and he responds in a dismissive manner. What if the guy never changes. 10yrs? 20yrs? 30yrs? You keep holding on and being christ-like. We can't all be Mrs. Shanon
Forgive does not mean stay. God does not have abuse in store for us period. God is not the creator of chaos or confusion and abuse is a result of confusion. You can forgive and walk away
I feel like those two situations are very different. The cancer and the depression.
It’s not… both are complex and can be lethal…mentally sick is no different from physical sickness. Both requires various treatments
Ppl speak on marriages as if all marriages are ordained by God but ppl get into some marriages without consulting God at all. God does not intend for anyone to stay in abusive situations.
Praying Trice get out of this situation safe and sound 🙏🏾
🙏🏽
Sorry SHANNON is SOOO WRONG on this; he needs to read this scripture again:
Luk 17:3 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother trespasses against you, rebuke him. And IF HE REPENTS, forgive him.
Luk 17:4 And if he trespasses against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turns again to you, saying, I REPENT , you shall forgive him.
- WHAT DOES REPENT MEANS?….please be careful here folks!
I’m so disappointed-
@dkgnew you are one of the few people who gets the repentance part...
People know how to manipulate religion that’s why it’s so many people lost, confuse, depressed, angry, and emotionally unstable.
I was so glad to hear that young woman speak on forgiveness. We are not Christ. We are pressing towards the mark in that pressing there is responsibility for your actions. I think we need to introduce integrity if you have none and you don’t have the ability of being remorseful or repent, what are we forgiving , a habit that is dangerous down low situations ,men are sleeping with men and coming back to their wives giving them diseases. How do you forgive that ??? other then prayer and understanding that you have to look out for yourself ,,, how do you live with somebody who is reprobating their mind and you keep forgetting .I’m a survivor thank God I made it.
Adultery IS a biblically acceptable reason for leaving a marriage! "V" I thank God for your courage!
I don't understand what Shannon is trying to communicate. Is he saying forgiveness is synonymous with staying 🤷🏾! I'm confused
Yeah, I'm really confused with his point. We were all born into sin...so does a baby deserve death although they did nothing to deserve it.?
@@MsTannica good point 👍🏾
His advice is horrifying. Forgiveness does not mean let him beat me, kill me, traumatize my children. His wife doesn't even agree with him. No the Bible doesn't change but it doesn't say that what forgiveness is.
For women facing situations like Vee and Trice:
Forgiveness DOES NOT mean staying. Abuse and adultery are recognized in the Bible as grounds for divorce. Don’t let anyone manipulate you into believing you’re obligated to stay in an abusive situation-read the Bible for yourself. Jesus taught forgiveness, yes, but He never said to stay and endure abuse or unfaithfulness. "Turning the other cheek" means choosing not to repay evil with evil, not accepting ongoing harm. ALSO, don't tell the abuser you're leaving, especially if it's physical abuse. Silently make your plans and they'll get the message when you're no longer there. Someone else can hand them the divorce papers.
Shannon was not right in saying a person should stay in an abusive marriage for the sake of forgiveness. You can forgive AND leave. Children have died and women have lost their life. Not all forgiveness leads to restoration. Use wisdom!
Let just think not everyone will choose Christ in the end. God doesn’t even force a relationship when someone breaks covenant. Why should a spouse stay for an unrepentant heart?
If you’re in this situation give your spouse to the Lord and surrender yourself. Talk to him daily to lead and guide you into his will. God will give you the wisdom, community and love to know whether you should leave or not. Go to God first. Some spouses change and some don’t. But you stay with the Lord and you remain holy ❤ 1 Peter 3:1 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
People also forget that scripture even says in Ephesians 5:25 "husbands love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it." Any man who decided to physically abuse his wife is going against that and not treating his wife with care. So, for safety purposes, a woman being abused should not stay.
@@carlicee yea I wish this was taught more!
I’m so excited to watch this. You guys have been on fire !!! I pray the Lord continues to bless you all!
I’m glad my Dad didn’t leave my Mom. I’m glad we as a family stayed together and stayed by her side. It wasn’t easy and many times I didn’t think she would make it but SHE DID!! We all made it together on the other side and so much grateful for it.
God bless V. Ol buddy lost a good one. Sadly, many aren’t healed enough to appreciate a beautiful virtuous woman.
I’m so disappointed in that male’s guest advice he seemed to have a bias perspective based off his current medical situation and not wanting his wife to leave him. The Bible does say you can leave if there is adultery meaning cheating but please research it for yourself I am a baby Christian
@@Godfirst4eva you are absolutely right the Bible does say that about adultery as grounds for divorce. I was hoping someone would bring that up
Yes, that comment did catch me off guard as well which initiated me doing some further research. The Bible does explain this in Mark 10:2-5 but basically adultery IS grounds for divorce ,however it also states that Moses wrote this law because of us having a hardened heart . Now I can understand his perspective. GOD requires that we forgive so that we in return can be forgiven by him . With a harded heart it is impossible to say that you have truly forgiven someone.
By the way, I do not support abuse or adultery. In his defense, I think that’s what he was trying to explain. I also believe situations like this, having the ability to “forgive someone 70×7”comes in. It takes a lot to be a true child of God .
But we all fall short.
It's adultery and abandonment
The Bible does not say to divorce. It give grounds for divorce in that circumstance, those are not the same thing. God hates divorce so if people can find a point to work it out, God gets all the glory
THIS IS SO SAD….life is so short to waste so much time in dysfunctional behaviors. Many are trauma bonding with No healthy tools to manage a marriage out of crisis…life is guaranteed to bring storms and men will try to drink, cheat, abuse, etc, there way out of the storm….everyone is damaged in the long run and we pass it on to the kids…what a sad cycle.
V you are a woman with the FRUITS of the SPIRIT the way you handled that conversation!! God bless you
I love the wisdom of married couple in the group discussion but, Shannon speaks about Jesus’ sacrifice for us. So the young lady should be willing to put up with whatever but, just the guest caller before her(V) he wants the caller to get weapon. I’m confused. Maybe this is me not picking up what Shannon is putting down because the Bible also says thou shall not kill also. I don’t want to trivialize marriage in anyway but, Jesus didn’t say to his disciples when they entered the town and people reject you. He didn’t say to keep on trying to convince the people to believe, he said to dust off your feet and keep moving. This is a heavy one. I commend (V) for the peace that God put in her heart. You can tell from the way she is speaking.
Ryan ate that wisdom and sacrifice bar up. Spoke truth to power Ryan love it!
I chose to walk away Everytime smh Everytime..Thanks.Miss V
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I’m praying for Trice and her babies. You can’t fail at anything that’s already finished sis! Abuse is something you should never ever get used to. Take you and your babies, go through what ever you have to go through to get out of that. God will be with you the whole way just pray and call on God please but MOVE babe! Don’t be still in that, be diligent in moving away from an abusive man!
Replay...I love the segment with V. I absolutely agree with everything she said. I respect Shannon but he was way off in this segment
Praying for your healing Mr. Shannon 🙏🏽🙏🏽
100%%%% he’s missing a very important part- GOD laid down the law for punishment of evil. Anything considered abuse most often is a legal and public safety issue- and God makes allowances- The SPIRIT of the law means NOT only adultery but things on that same level of infidelity! SHANNON is nice but NUTS on this.
His WIFE is looking at him crazy!!!! I feel her tryna keep a straight face!!!!!! 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️👀🤦🏾♂️👀
As an adult, I can make a decision based on what I want and need. I don't ask questions about what my life should look like
V...thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your testimony. Only the peace in your heart knows what God has/have for you to do for your family. Sometimes we have to make a choice today and continue to pray for what we want while using wisdom and discernment, Keeping you and your family in my prayers
What is Shannon talking about cause I am confused. The line is drawn at abuse and adultery as well as abandonment, and that's reasons according to the Bible. Yes, I do t think most churches do well in handling abuse and domestic violence in marriages, they often leave women feeling ashamed , unloved, hopeless and like second class citizens
For the x files case (Mike), it would be helpful for him to seek more spiritual guidance in this matter. His wife may need deliverance from some evil spirits working within her. Their situation is deeper than what I believe was touched in this segment.
@TheBeautii2009 this!!! I know this is an older episode but it broke my heart to listen to. She needs deliverance.
Thank you V, well said!
He lost me at the “universe “ praying for him.
This right here is hitting, praying for a new season for my marriage, thanks for the encouragement ❤❤❤
V, well spoken sweetheart! ❤
Forgiveness doesn’t mean staying in the marriage. Staying in the marriage doesn’t equal to forgiveness either; how many married couples hate and resent each other?!! AND, only those who REPENT can be saved by our Lord Jesus!!! Who would the sister forgive him if he is not repent to God???
Ryan, gave a great example. Christ and the veteran in his example, sacrificed their lives for an overall good, to save lives. How is a woman sacrificing her life or the lives of children for a man’s abuse, his sexual indiscretions, his addiction, etc. for an overall good? This goes for men accepting foolishness and abuse from women as well.
Forgiveness is not the same as granting someone full access to your life. You can forgive and decrease level of access or prevent access altogether. God forgives and loves all of us, but every loved human will not gain access to Heaven.
Deut 30:19 I have set before you life and death… choose life!!! Matthew 19:9 divorce is allowed if adultery is committed!! Does this guy know about these texts??
V is on point! This guy is over using Christ like! We are given discernment in forgiveness as well. We don't need to die on the cross to be Christ like... Jesus already died for our sins we don't need to do that for others. Some people abuse the word or maybe misinterpret in a way to oppress others in their wrong doings.
Also the advice given to Trice as far as you can’t make someone do the work is the same thing they should’ve said to the man with the depressive/suicidal wife. He has done everything that he can do, you can not help someone that refuses to help themself. In no way is he being selfish if he decides he can’t take anymore. At this point he must do what’s best for himself and his daughter.
I am a minister of the gospel and this was very hard to watch. Shannon was COMPLETELY OFF! SIR LISTEN TO YOUR WIFE! V I AM SOOOO PROUD OF YOU!!!
And speaking as a prophet of the most high, he was definitely not connected spiritually speaking. He seems to like to dominate conversations.
Luk 17:3 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother trespasses against you, rebuke him. And IF HE REPENTS, forgive him.
Luk 17:4 And if he trespasses against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turns again to you, saying, I REPENT , you shall forgive him.
- WHAT DOES REPENT MEANS?….please be careful here folks!
If the PERSON DOES NOT REPENT - there’s NO call ( demand from God) to offer forgiveness- it goes to together!
Tysean and Ryan, when did forgiveness equal staying in such a marriage that V described? Ask Dr. Spirit...she clarified that in a previous episode.
This was great.. I understood everyone's point of view! Definitely what makes each one of us UNIQUE ! ❤
Shirley is incredibly patient with her husband, and it’s truly beautiful… however, I don’t think Sharron was quite ready to come onto this show. He’s projecting a lot, and you can see on his face sometimes at his disbelief of the advice Shirley is giving to marriages about leaving, separating etc. as if he thinks Shirley will leave/separate him. He’s shifting a lot of conversations back to himself and his processing. It’s uncomfortable to watch if im being honest. May God grant him with the peace, and the comfort during this hard time for him, his wife, and their families. Give them your Joy to build strength and endurance. In Jesus name I pray, Amen 🙏🏾🤍
V was very eloquent and calm in her response. Hope she heals truly❤. The same Bible does say you can divorce if there's infidelity in the marriage. Self love is a thing. Love others as you love yourself. If the man in question is not loving or respecting you as V said, how low of a self esteem do you have, to force yourself onto someone who is showing he doesn't respect or love you?The ex- husband wasn't even trying to fix anything. I just think Shannon is one of those men that put women through shit then expect forgiveness and not being left. He lucky he has someone that hasn't left hin after alladat coz not a lot of people are being christ-like out here. You can forgive and separate yourself from the mess. Love people from a far. There are consenquences.
Can we have a break from Shannon, just bring his wife for now
Yes Lord… prayer is essential and having a relationship with God is the best thing we can do for our selves
V is definitely on to something
The Blind is a good testimonial movie. It’s a true story about Phil and Kay Robertson’s marriage and salvation. Phil was an alcoholic which led to abuse and infidelity, so Kay left with the children. Through the grace and power of God, their lives and marriage were restored. They have a great testimony! Everyone’s story is different, but God’s Word remains. We must move with wisdom and obey and trust God’s Word and Spirit.
Sorry Shannon is
misinterpreting the Word. You all need to learn biblical hermeneutics to be able to rightly interpret the Word
Tht is great you and your wife were able to work through the hard things. you two are a great example that marriages can work through hard things, however everybodys situation and circumstance is different. God wants all of us to be happy period. I appreciate V and you definaetly exemplified Christ like behaviour with your attitude. Sis, I was in a very similar situation and I got a restraining order and it was granted, and my husband has never put his hands on me.
Please go plant base. Please reach out to Dr. Bobby Price ASAP
I second that! ❤
Yaaas...I was just going to say the same thing! Juice fasts have also had phenomenal results in cancer patients
I dont know. I believe in the statement that "You cant help a person that does not want to help themselves"
I’m really bothered by the repetitive comparisons between cancer and mental illness. Two different demons.
I love this conversation because awareness is necessary. 1) Sharese needs a protective order before she changes locks and says her husband can't come back to the home. 2) With Vee...the bible says you can divorce when infidelity/adultery is involved. When safety is a concern, leaving should aways be an option. We have to read the whole bible. The abuser is subject to the scripture that instructs against harming others. I love Vee's example of David. Sometimes the consequences of us NOT praying about whether God approves of a mate and properly observing their fruit, is divorce.
Shannon was talking to be talking with Vee bc she simply said you forgive but you still move on. With that you won’t have to continue forgiving
Treece The power of a praying wife is a good tool ❤
Great discussion!
This episode actually pissed me off. You can 100% forgive without reconciliation, especially if someone is being abused. Like V said, too many people have died because of accepting abuse. Shannon's insight on this topic is wild and very legalistic. As a Christian, draw the line at abuse, please!
Forgiveness does not mean access… like make it make sense
Blessings, V Be Encouraged ❤❤
Caught on the Replay. In regards to the X-Files, I empathize with this family. As one who has battled episodes of depression on and off for years, I cannot say what another should do because everyone is impacted in this case. She is dealing with grief and that will never go away. However, one should want to get help to better cope. Its hard while in the mist of an episode, so having someone who truly cares about you, admit you into an institution for the help you need is imperative, especially if dealing with suicidal ideations. Until you have experienced that type of grief or extreme sadness, you will never fully understand. I pray his wife finds the strength to pull through for her daughter. There are medications that help tremendously and when coupled with therapy is like night and day. I made the decision to ride this thing called life until the wheels fall off. When you choose to live and process those feelings and trauma, life gets so much better.
Dude is calling on "the universe" and Jesus in the same sentence. Proceed with caution on any advice he gives.
@@SonarLegend-gj1yo definitely agree... God doesn't want us to suffer especially with our spouses. He tells us to be equally yoked. He doesn't bless marriages that he didn't put together. I totally agree that we should be careful about who we listen to.
He said all the folks “in the universe” praying for me. That’s not unbiblical he never gave the universe credit for anything.
@@jesagreene Christ centered communications don't use new age terminology because of ambiguity.
Yes, I was a bit taken aback with the Universe comment.
Baby he said “if I didn’t have all y’all in the universe” aka all the humans on earth who prayed for him. Not new age at all. The universe was and still is a word with a specific meaning that is not related to new age. It has been twisted to mock God so yea I get how you’d walk away with this. Listen again my love!
There's absolutely no way I could counsel someone to stay in n emotionally, physically, any sort of abusive relationship for the sake of my faith. God did not call me to live a life being tormented. The segment with V made me uncomfortable . Its giving the church I grew up in that counseled all bad in the name of scripture, not considering safety and the law. Ion like it. S/O to V for being level headed, well spoken, forgiving, AND DIVORCING!
Pray from a place of safety. I am on earth and vulnerable.
Shannon did himself such a disservice by not listening to this woman because now I’m wondering what type of advice he’s been giving to the couples he counsels?I fully understand what he is trying to say but his context is wrong ! Also, don’t cry about what the Bible says regarding forgiveness and not also preach about the ONE reason God did give permission for divorce …infidelity ! Which is what this man did and more ! I found myself getting triggered by this man but V really did have a great rebuttal ! Overall I enjoy a challenging conversation and am glad we are able to have them but when it comes to forgiveness vs safety…ehhhh idk
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Jesus died for us to have reconciliation with the heavenly father that was broken when Adam and Eve went against his wishes
Bruhhhh!! They came to the shop and she paid for her husband spa treatment ❤ she said she seen me online and she was saying she and her husband was married along time and more
Shannon sounds like he condones abuse of women even if it’s not his intention.
Great job V! I don’t agree with Shannon and the point he is trying to make.
No one chooses sickness of any kind especially mental illness… Mike needs to exhaust all means to help his sick wife… in marriage you can’t just bail out. Marriage is about the sacrifice. He needs to check his states commitment for mental illness…
Sometimes when people say give to God we don’t tell them what that insist of so they still worry. We all are made from God so we all individually belong to God. We can choose to be selfish and fall into our desires which is contrary to Gods will or we can do what God made us for and be with him in spirit. I learned that God is apart of me and when I take him out of my life I fall into my own desires. God is the lively hood of our existence and I’m upset that Marriage is idolized as validation instead of a covenant. We have to be with him or we will make relationships into this needed thing to be alive. We don’t own anyone even in Marriage. We have to divide ourselves from people and understand that all of us are individuals so when things happen in our relationship we can not feel as though another persons actions is a reflection of our identity and get caught up in depression but understand that a persons actions is due to their own individual struggles so we can pray through love and understand and not for control over the other person. Prayer is an action of love and understanding and not control and validation.
Two reasons The Word of God allows divorce Adultery
Abandonment.. when a person turns away from God, no longer a believer.
You also have to be wise and God is a forgiving God.
I love Shannon but I feel he was wrong for that line of questioning and almost insinuating she was wrong or should’ve stayed. What was that about?!
Y'all this was so painful to watch
It realllllly was! The hardest watch yet!
I disagree with what he is saying. I understand his wife is battling depression. However if she decides not to heal herself than what is he to do? She is responsible for her healing.
Her husband has some deep rooted trauma as well. The alcohol is used to medicate his trauma.
I can relate to Trice. My situation is similar.
Shannon, forgiveness doesn't mean you stay in a an emotional and mental abusive relationship. God wants us to have peace, he wants us to pursue his kingdon and win others over the Christ, and if we stay in a toxic marriage, our energy is drained, and we are not even able to focus on the things God is calling us to do then you remove yourself. I am not saying God cannot mend the marriage and bring us back together, however you move on and if it was meant to be God will bring us back together period.
70x7 is 490... So I don't think he meant to endure suffering from a spouse for forever. That's not being equally yoked.