How to *deeply* validate yourself (so he can’t invalidate you) (emotional validation)

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 33

  • @Nina_1217
    @Nina_1217 6 місяців тому +19

    This channel is seriously so important in my healing journey.
    Even though I have been going to therapy for the last 3 years, I still learn new things about myself that I wasn’t aware of previously.
    Thank you for the content you create. It means a lot to me. ♥️

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому +2

      Thank you so so much for being so kind. Your comment has made my day! Sending you lots of love xxx 💗💘🥰

  • @amysworld_xx
    @amysworld_xx 6 місяців тому +8

    the best online therapist for free. Thank you so much for making these videos x

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  2 місяці тому

      Aw bless you ❤❤❤❤ thank you for being so sweet xx

  • @RikkeGade
    @RikkeGade 6 місяців тому +8

    Omg i just thought of you and then i open UA-cam and you have posted. Gonna watch it later this evening. Have felt so depressed the past two weeks but i’m happy to exist in the same world as you, Alesia ❤️❤️

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому +1

      I am so sorry to hear you've felt depressed my lovely. It is such a heavy feeling - something I struggle with from time to time. Please know you can pop me a message anytime. Sending you a warm hug xxx💗💗💗💗
      I am happy to exist in the world at the same time as you too 🥹🥹🥹💗💗💗💗

  • @TimJay.
    @TimJay. 6 місяців тому +2

    To be honest I wish I had found this a month ago when I was going through this in the moment but I'm still so thankful for finding this now.. because I had almost repeated the cycle

  • @just_rita6505
    @just_rita6505 6 місяців тому +5

    Alessia, your energy is so beautiful, calming and warm, you're so genuine, kind, vulnerable! I'm so grateful for your videos they help me a lot and the topics are always so in time with my current thoughts and feelings.
    A week ago I broke up with my boyfriend because I didn't feel emotionally validated, I felt like he was only interested in himself and talking about his problems/thoughts all the time and I didn't feel like there is a place for me and my thoughts and feelings, every time I tried to tell him something about my life or anything in general it seemed like he wasn't really listening or was just waiting for his turn. Personally, I'm quite reserved, introverted and closed-off but I'm trying to be more open with people. But with him I started to close off even more and started to be more anxious (even though he is a good person and I felt safe and comfortable with him somehow). I didn't like how I started to feel mentally with him so I just decided to choose myself and my wellbeing and let him go after 2 months of dating even though I really liked him. Even though it was not an easy decision, I think it was the right one. I feel better alone than I was with him and now trying to love and validate myself.
    Thank you so much for your videos.

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  2 місяці тому +1

      I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to respond to you my love. ❤ I’m so proud of you for doing what was right for you - it can be so difficult to walk away. Thank you for sharing your story with me ❤ sending a hug you way ❤❤❤❤

  • @daniellaportal2021
    @daniellaportal2021 6 місяців тому +4

    Loved this video. I ended a deeply invalidating relationship a handful of months ago, and many of the points and inner work practices you brought up were central in my healing journey. I still learned some new tips though, and will remind myself of them from now on :))

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому +1

      Thank you! 🥰🥰 I am so happy to hear you've healed from that experience my lovely. I'm sorry you were deeply invalidated, you don't deserve that. Sending you so much love 💗💘 xxx

  • @blissdise
    @blissdise 6 місяців тому +4

    You, your voice and your words are so enchanting and soothing. Thank you so much big sister! ❤️

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому

      Aw thank you! What lovely words! 🥰🥰🥰💗💗💗💗💗 xxxxxx

  • @sl2698
    @sl2698 6 місяців тому +4

    Thank you so much, Alessia. Your videos are a safe space for me, and i love how vulnerable and accepting of your emotions are, it's a great example for me to do as well. Your feminine energy and tone of voice have this healing effect, i love your content, you're doing an amazing job, i'm grateful i found you and this lovely channel that teaches us how to become better women for our own selves. 🎀💞

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому +1

      Aw thank you for taking the time to comment such a kind words. 💗 I am grateful to have you apart of this community 🥰🥰💘💘 xx

  • @susanasantos1878
    @susanasantos1878 6 місяців тому +1

    I just had an argument today with my partner over dumb stuff and I needed this video. Thank you! :3

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому +1

      I hope it made you feel safer and understood - it feels so painful to be in the dark in a relationship. Sending you a big hug xx💘

  • @Kb25126
    @Kb25126 6 місяців тому +1

    Hi Alessia, your videos on decentering men have been helping me. But, I find myself feeling threatened by other women who receive the male validation I crave, which makes it hard to befriend them. Can you make a video on how male validation affects our relationships with other women and how to address it?

  • @marciafab7
    @marciafab7 6 місяців тому +3

    Wow! Such an educational video. Sending you safe, warm and cozy cuddles. 💜

    • @alessiasutherberry
      @alessiasutherberry  6 місяців тому +1

      Aw thanks Marcia! Sending you love and appreciation back 💗💘🥰

  • @Sam-eq7dg
    @Sam-eq7dg 6 місяців тому +1

    What to do if you feel invalidated
    1. Find a safe space to calm you and don’t distract yourself with your phone
    2. Let your breath slow down and try to connect with your body and feeling
    3. Have a conversation with your inner self: what triggered this emotion? Where do you feel this emotion? You feeling tense anywhere?
    4. Positive fact : how are you showing up in the relationship? What are you doing?
    5. You’re not your feeling : they just enter your body they aren’t your permanent reality. You are feeling this feeling you are NOT the feeling
    6. Reconnect with your childhood self
    7. Try to observe that feeling from distance
    8. Answer these questions on paper: what is painful for you right now? What have you done well? What do you deserve?
    9. Do something relaxing and enjoyable

  • @verunaes
    @verunaes 6 місяців тому

    hello angel, could you make a video on how to not be bored with your own appearance?

  • @fashionamavi
    @fashionamavi 4 місяці тому +1

    Thank you for your work

  • @shelbymorningstar6760
    @shelbymorningstar6760 6 місяців тому

    All of this applies .. but he is the father of my child , so I just feel so stuck . 😣

  • @eleonorac2224
    @eleonorac2224 6 місяців тому +3

    #Savespace

  • @dylannmarie
    @dylannmarie 6 місяців тому +1

    Yes! ♥️💖😊

  • @amanda_mos
    @amanda_mos 5 місяців тому +1