What My Depression Feels Like
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- Опубліковано 19 чер 2023
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MedCircle host, Kyle Kittleson, shares with the audience a brief description of what his Depression feels like. Hopefully, this can help someone better understand what those who struggle with Depression may be experiencing.
#mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealth #medcircle #psychology #livedexperience #depression #livingwithdepression #depressionrelief #depressionmanagement #depression
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Depression is when you are living your life because you have to, not because you want to.
this.
Exactly right i had depression and leme tell you you you feel like there is no energy let inside you , you can't walk but just wanted to be in bed but but listen you can't even stay in bed then you go to chair to study and start overthinking, i am gonna fail for sure have to repeat over
For me what worked was getting know or reading about other people problems like how tiny my problem they have
It doesn't sound so big but at that time you think so deeply that it really actually Hits you where it's needed
Spot on
I'm living for my family at this point. If I didn't have them I don't know.
Oh my gosh I relate to this so much. But... I can't be depressed. I hate that I cannot tell whether I'm downplaying how I feel or not.
Bingo. I described it as, "everything feels like way too much effort to bother, and nothing matters enough to care about." Dread, overwhelm, mental & physical exhaustion.
Going Through It
The strongest souls fight the most difficult battles. Depression is like an angry dragon that fights us. To master depression, you have to go through it. One does not defeat the angry dragon. Because you are the dragon and the depression. You slowly become one with the dragon and the depression and gain strength in going through it.
I hope this might helps as it helps me.
@@user-so4sv1dq4z I use medication. It helps immensely.
Very well said!
I have been there.. and I got through it and healed. I had suppressed memories of childhood trauma. Now happy, great job, rewarding relationship. You can beat this too, you can be free and whole. Much love.
*How did you do it? Did you get into therapy? Please share with us. It could be a great help.*
which type of depression you had
Cool
Cool...
Elaborate? How did you reveal and heal from your childhood trauma?
Why do you have to brag bro lol
When people think they're "lazy" or fatigued or overwhelmed, it can actually be depression in disguise if it lasts more than a few days. It's so important to be kind to ourselves and not be ashamed of depression. The book "30 Days to Reduce Depression" by Harper Daniels really helped.
Going Through It
The strongest souls fight the most difficult battles. Depression is like an angry dragon that fights us. To master depression, you have to go through it. One does not defeat the angry dragon. Because you are the dragon and the depression. You slowly become one with the dragon and the depression and gain strength in going through it.
I hope this might helps as it helps me.
I don't think anyone who hasn't experienced it would ever know how it feels like...
and I would pray no one ever has to feel or fall into depression
once in, one can never get out
Meds work for me. Highly recommend.
@@angelacahill9460 hmm, my main problem is I don't have the courage to go to a psychiatrist or doctor and while I was on meds for 3 weeks My constant repetitive thoughts went but I still remained numb and still am, and I am not deeply depressed as I was before( like dying depressed) so I don't know on what grounds should I go to a doctor bcz I can't even feel anything to tell someone what's troubling or something, it's like no point...
@@mkdutta9428I feel you
Yes
@@mkdutta9428might be the wrong antidepressant for u, can try different meds at different doctors. don’t give up! :) i was having suicidal thoughts until a week ago i started on Lexapro, feeling much more grateful for life! u can do it!
Depressed is when you go to bed at night hoping to not wake up in the morning
Depressed is not being able to complete necessary tasks that you know you need to do, you might even want to do…. But you physically cannot do it
Depressed is trying to patch over the emptiness you feel with external things like food, shopping or even destructive behavior like drinking or promiscuity
Nothing you’ve ever achieved matters, you’ve nothing to look forward to and you avoid mirrors or showers because the act of showering means that you have to interact with your body
Not really some times you don’t shower because you imagine that as a hard task , you need to go up from your bed , remove your close go to it , shower , massage your hair and body ,then dry your hair , put clothes .. ecc .. it’s easier and time “saving” not doing it at all .. depression feels like you have to be intentional on everything you do .. most people go on autopilot.
“Physically cannot do it”. Shut up. This is the reason people don’t take depression seriously and think you’re all a bunch of whiners. If someone put a gun to your head you would have no problem “physically doing it” or anything else. You do not have Parkinson’s. Get a grip.
Depression is probably “real”, but THAT’S not “depression”. It’s whiny first world BS.
sometimes my depression gets so bad that i just cry for no reason, its painfull
Depression, pretending to be okay, even believing your own lies, and the lies don’t stay there when you’re alone. You may cried while you smile, nobody knows what’s in your mind until you’re no longer there
I can relate
I describe it as feeling almost exactly like the immediate grief from the death of someone close. You don't want to do your favorite things, you just want to stay in bed, you're not interested in your favorite foods - or maybe you're only interested in your favorite foods, for comfort.
The best ways to help yourself & cope is pretty much the same as with grief as well: spending time with friends & family, or even just enough friendly people each day, going to therapy & /or writing out your thoughts, focusing on your health, getting sunshine, gratitude, etc. Basically a combination of taking good care of yourself whilst also distracting yourself (in a healthy way!!!) from all the negative thoughts with all the positives in life.
The differences being that Depression (the disorder, not the feeling) & grief usually take different amounts of time to start feeling better, depression is from chemical imbalance rather than a life event, (you're grieving "over nothing" in the outside world, it's all internal, which isn't your fault, btw) & depression will come back if you don't at least periodically keep up with your (healthy!!! I cannot stress this enough) coping strategies.
Of course this is just my experience & what has worked for me, but I feel it's a helpful way to explain what it feels like to those without depression. The ways to feel better also line up with what professionals say for both grief & depression & it isn't hurting anyone so I'm keeping this ingrained in me belief system until proven wrong lol
Going Through It
The strongest souls fight the most difficult battles. Depression is like an angry dragon that fights us. To master depression, you have to go through it. One does not defeat the angry dragon. Because you are the dragon and the depression. You slowly become one with the dragon and the depression and gain strength in going through it.
I hope this might helps as it helps me.
Depression is an interminable bereavement of the soul.
"Being depressed" is different than "Having Depression".
I can literally see the sadness in his eyes… 🥺
we will all concur this together!! 🙏💕
The thing is, i know I’m depressed, and when I open up to tell somebody, they don’t believe me! Which makes my thoughts that no one cares about and I’m going to eternally die alone ever bigger 😁
Depression is were you randomly get agitated. Depending on how bad it gets you get used to it and don’t even feel sad. Your numb. You don’t cry. You can’t cry. It’s scary because I’m scared if someone dies I won’t be able to cry at all. You don’t feel emotions. But you feel everything at once to the point it numbs you. You don’t find anything entertaining. You feel lonely in bed laying down. You feel like you wanna go back to bed when people. My only joy and my only thing I I thought about was her. Until you left. I don’t have purpose. I know I did. But it dosnt feel like it. I don’t find benefits. We slowly become less hygienic and lose the point in living.
reasons to stay alive 🤍
1. your family
2. your friends
3. the feeling you get when you’ve finished something
4. the feeling you get when you get a compliment
5. the feeling you get when you buy new clothes
6. the feeling you get when you try on new clothes
7. the feeling you get when youre room is tidy
8. the feeling you get when youre laughing hesterically.
9. the feeling you get when you make a new friend
10. the feeling you get when you make someone smile
11. you’d have to watch your family and friends grieve.
12. you’ve never been to that place you always wanted to visit.
13. you’ve never been to disney world.
14. you’ve never been skinny dipping.
15. you’ve never swam in a lake.
16. you’ve never met your idol.
17. you haven’t gotten married.
18. you’ve never decorated your own house.
19. you’ve never saved someone’s life.
20. you haven’t learnt to drive.
21. there is music you haven’t listen too.
22. you have so many more people to meet.
23. everyone who thought you’d do well in life, would have been wrong.
24. the people who said you’d end up no where, would have been right.
25. all the fake people would pretend to like u and post u on their stories.
26. you would have been the best mom or dad.
27. you haven’t lived the ‘my funeral will be packed’ type of life.
28. your friends would suffer.
29. your mum would never be able to walk into your room.
30. you haven’t apologised to people you have hurt.
31. someone loves you.
32. you are not alone.
33. i’m here for you.
34. the clothes you’re buried in might be gross.
35. you haven’t truly loved yourself yet.
36. suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems.
37. you haven’t watched your kids open their christmas presents.
38. you haven’t watched your kids grow older.
39. the pain you feel right now, isn’t forever.
40. there are so many foods you haven’t tried.
41. you’ll never get the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day.
42. finding your person.
43. really soft pillows.
44. eating pizza with your kids and partner.
45. you’ve never danced in the rain.
46. you’ve never kissed someone in the rain.
47. there are so many hobbies you haven’t tried.
48. you’ll never have a sleepover with your best friend again.
49. your friends would blame themselves.
50. your mom's smile.
51. your best friend's laugh.
52. your sister would lose her best friend.
53. your cousins that look up to you.
54. hot chocolate on cold days.
55. ice water on hot days.
56. getting a tan.
57. hearing ‘i love you’.
58. not being able to sleep the night before and exciting day.
59. your birthday.
60. you’ve never been to a nightclub.
61. long hot showers.
62. long steamy baths.
63. freshly shaved legs.
64. perfectly smooth hair.
65. watching people trip over small objects.
66. you could have a huge impact on someone’s life.
67. you would regret dying.
68. you can’t change your mind once you're gone.
69. you wake up everyday for a reason.
70. stars.
71. you will always be enough.
72. movies that make you feel warm when they’re over.
73. reading powerful quotes.
74. genuine smiles.
75. the crunch of autumn leaves.
76. christmas.
77. christmas eve.
78. decorating the tree.
79. long meaningful hugs.
80. sunsets.
81. ice cream.
82. you never got that puppy.
83. you are so brave, it would be a waste to let the fire go.
84. rainbows.
85. travelling to new places.
86. funny stories.
87. funny jokes.
88. inside jokes.
89. coffee.
90. your talents would go to waste.
91. the feeling you get when you’re truly happy.
92. all nighters with friends.
93. cuddling.
94. reconnecting with old friends and family.
95. smiling.
96. capturing perfect moments on camera.
97. swimming on a hot day.
98. feeling cozy in blankets.
99. helping other people with the same thing you got help with.
100! becoming successful.
101. cute babies.
102. cute old people.
103. love stories that make you jealous.
104. telling crazy stories.
105. watching lightning.
106. watching rain.
107. star gazing.
108. recovery.
109. melted chocolate.
110. freshly baked cookies.
111. late night adventures.
112. overcoming fears.
113. sunday mornings.
114. friday mornings.
115. you’ll be dead, forever.
116. you will make a difference to people.
117. picnics with friends.
118. waking up late.
119. waking up late and ending up being on time.
120. to prove them wrong.
121. to prove them you can.
122. to prove you're strong.
123. to love and be loved.
124. the ocean.
125. pets.
126. very loud music.
127. days out.
128. finishing a book.
129. conversations that just flow.
130. learning new things.
131. you are important.
132. you are wanted.
133. mistakes.
134. snow.
135. sun.
136. flowers.
137. flowers that look gorgeous but smell gross.
138. new bed sheets.
139. new home decor.
140. roller coasters.
141. theme parks.
142. smiling at strangers.
143. random acts of kindness.
144. the sound of water.
145. visiting a place from your childhood.
146. to look back on all the things you got yourself through on your own.
147. to feel proud.
148. reassurance.
149. cute nicknames.
150. long stares that make you feel loved.
151. meaningful gifts.
152. blowing out candles.
153. meeting online friends in real life.
154. success.
155. to work the job you always wanted.
156. the live the life you dreamt of.
157. babies smiling.
158. sleep.
159. tea.
160. breaking rules.
161. dreams.
162. the last day of school/work.
163. taking pictures.
164. brownies.
165. bubbles.
166. water slides.
167. holidays.
168. to fall asleep on someone.
169. to feel protected.
170. to grow taller.
171. to grow stronger.
172. to grow old.
173. to make memories you’ll cherish.
174. to laugh at old pictures.
175. to be loved by a pet.
176. the first signs of summer.
177. the first signs of autumn.
178. the first signs of winter.
179. the first signs of spring.
180. to binge watch a series.
181. to live independently.
182. to get somewhere in life all by yourself.
183. to not have broken any promises.
184. to fulfill your promises.
185. to breathe.
186. so you can tell your children stories of when you was there age.
187. so say you’re alive.
188. to know you’re stronger than you think.
189. falling in love.
190. you’ve never snuck out.
191. you’ve never not smashed your phone.
192. you’ve never stayed out all night.
193. you are a kind soul.
194. you have a warm heart.
195. you care for others.
196. the smell of pancakes.
197. when you walk over frosty grass.
198. you haven't truly apologized to all the people you've hurt
199. i love you.
200! to say you made it.
anyone reading this, please know you are not alone and I love every single one of you. things are hard right now i know. you’ll get over it I promise. nothing lasts forever.
My depression makes all those activities seem boring, pointless, uninteresting, and a waste of time.
My depression makes me not desire socializing.
My depression makes me not care about my life, the future or taking initiative.
All I want to do is sleep my life away.
Getting over it sounds nice, but it’s been 2 decades of dragging my feet.
You get used to it and stop caring after so long.
i hate this, it's so ignorant
I dont want to feel happiness because the pain afterwards doubles so theres no point in being happy if your gonna lose it all
Theres a void
True ❤ we feel numb and uninterested.
“Couldn’t be bothered.”😔
The thing about clinical depression that a lot who've never had it fail to understand. Is often times, it's not like it's something external that's making us feel this way. They are self inflicted wounds internally. Being depressed is like wanting to go lay down in a corner and not talk to anyone not eat or drink anything and do nothing and just rot away. That's what depression is like at times. Where even getting out of bed is extremely difficult. You just wish you could sleep forever and not wake up. And then eventually if this goes on long enough untreated, you fall into the dreadful question "What's the point". Once you reach that point, it's VERY difficult to get out of. And as someone who has failed 4 attempts and is trying to recover. Depression is not to be taken lightly. And it needs to be taken more seriously. Clinical depression is not being sad or feeling a little down. It's you LITERALLY not wanting to do anything and nothing makes you happy anymore or at least you find little to no enjoyment out of anything. And eventually the only thing that brings any joy at all are addictions such as Alcohol, Porn, etc and even those eventually don't become enjoyable if you let depression go untreated long enough.
To anyone struggling, I hope you can find strength and courage to seek as much help as possible and take any step towards recovery. From someone who failed multiple attempts, even I struggle to keep going to this day, but I'm still here. And there's hope. Stay strong everybody please. 🫂
It’s crippling, it stripped me of all my will and left me broken. I fight it everyday, I knew it was real when I didn’t leave the house for a month and just slept in a dark closet all day long. Not to mention neglecting my personal hygiene. Scary thing
This is very accurate… the things that should make you feel happy don’t. Even the things you though you wanted most in life don’t make you feel anything. When you envision the best, most successful version of yourself you still feel empty. Like nothing holds any real meaning or significance
This is exactly what I feel
You can definitely be excited for the moment. The thing with clinical depression is as soon as that little excitement is over, here comes the anxiety of not feeling safe. Disappearing for months or even years at a time just to be somewhere probably alone n not knowing what to do which is stressful as hell. That leads to other things like intoxication and then waking up in the morning with something “missing” n stressing some more even after you find it after probably having a fit and tearing up shit about it. After all of that, still gotta think about living arrangements and the anxiety of being alone n robbed….. Complicated…….
Not to mention you wont feel love anymore. I have diagnosed Clinical depression i am on the suicide notes and not even love is felt. It’s complicated because it is the pain doesn’t stop.
Going Through It
The strongest souls fight the most difficult battles. Depression is like an angry dragon that fights us. To master depression, you have to go through it. One does not defeat the angry dragon. Because you are the dragon and the depression. You slowly become one with the dragon and the depression and gain strength in going through it.
I hope this might helps as it helps me.
For me it is just the lack of motivation. Like I worked but that is it and even that was sometimes quite lacklustre. all the other times I just wanted to sleep or do nothing. Sometimes I even looked aimlessly at something and let the day go by. I still have it and I am working myself through it but it is not easy. For me I guess I was depressed for a long time but I always thought I was just lazy but now I know I suffer from c-ptsd which resulted in anxiety and depressive moments, mostly I am sad and sometimes I feel nothing.I can’t even fake caring. But I am in therapy and I think that unpacked a lot that I have to process now.
Thank you
You nailed it on the head. That’s exactly how I feel
I attribute that flatness to the emotional blunting that accompanies antidepressant meds. I don't cry, but I don't laugh, either. I love your work.
Huh🚖? Right on the spot !!! Thank you for putting it into words
BEST EXPLANATION EVER👏👏👏
I can't sleep at all. It keeps you awake so you Know you are misereable!
Yes
A lottery win would definitely cure my depression.
This was so true...
For me depression feels like I have to be happy but really all I want to do is sit in my room and do nothing
i would say the best way to describe my depression would be, I don’t care if something good happens and I don’t care if someone bad happens. Nothing, yet everything effects and irritates me. I just. don’t. care.
For me, it feels like I’m literally the walking dead. I’m here because I have to be, not because I want to be. Everything takes effort. Everything!
I feel this way.
Yes.
This guy gets it.
i have really bad depression and severe body dysmorphia its so draining i wish i looked like the beauty standard i wish this i wish that. im slowly getting tired of myself.
That's exactly on the nose.
I wish somebody understood how I feel, but I would never wish this on anybody.
I feel it as a Boulder I’m my stomach rolled their by the anxiety and fear monster always behind me
What if you don’t want to do anything and generally don’t find joy just theoretically of course in case a friend asks
Exactly! 😔
Depressive realism is a true concept too.
My depression be like:
If i win the lottery i'll will have no react
If i survive a car crash i'll have no react
If a building collapse and almost hit me i'll just keep moving and have no react
Same 😢pls help me
I don’t know if anyone feels this, but being depressed isn’t living anymore. Your just trying to survive to see another tomorrow.
I remember when I was little I wanted depression bc I thought it gave me attention or sum(I was an attention seeker as a child lmao) and now that I have it I like rlly wish I don’t have it bc I might jump into a fire soon 🥲
So if you are also sick and tired of beeing in bed this means you dont have depression right?
Not clinically diagnosed, but ever since I was 15 I am like wanting to die. And every year my birthday comes, I always wish it would be my last. It doesn't make me excited, I always felt dreadful.
i dont have depression but,
I suffer anxiety and i get bullied In school
and and and
When i was in first grade my teacher pulled me Hard from the class to outside just because i ate one biscuit, she made me cry and suffer eating anxiety.
and i stayed quiet till this day.
i used to never eat from 1st grade to 7th , in 7th i started eating, my friends and family helped me start eating in school
i get panic attacks and anxiety attacks in school, i fainted in school twice,, andddd
my uncle passed away , Aunt passed away, Grandma passed away, and 2 grandpas passed away. now i have one more grandma and i love her so much! i dont want her to leave me..
life isnt that great.
and for the people that Have depression, im really sorry.
Separation anxiety
I would feel happy then I would come back crashing down. In the end yeah it doesn’t matter to me. If I got the money I’d be like “sweet” but clothes, pay off bills, buy a bunch of stuff then everything I bought would just look dull again. Yup it’s a never ending cycle. Life is just tasteless and bland to me, no matter how much seasoning you put, I’ll taste some hints of this and that but only subtle barely noticeable hints, not the entire thing though. But I guess even subtle might still be something I guess, however life always goes back to being dull.
same... hmmm....
Om depressed and insecure ever since i was 10 i am now 15
*Im
I don’t want to win the lottery because it would just be like “Alright, what now?” If you could have everything you ever wanted then there would no longer be something to strive for, no purpose. Sure, you could own a gazillion gadgets, sports cars, luxurious mansions, you could even travel every inch of the Earth. But in the end I feel like you’d end up bored if everything was possible.
Anhedonia is what that’s called
from nelia
being depressed is the same as being numb you aren't happy but not even sad you just live in the zero level nothing bothers you and nothing makes you happy you just don't care about anything even your life
No I don’t i have 7 symptoms out of 9 and i think about thinks that make me happy but it’s not as fun anymore
Isaiah 40:31 KJV 31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
Bingo
It’s spicy 🥵
Seriously😢 I am doing everything that i always wanted to but not at all excited😢
Actually, winning the lottery makes you feel bad for not feeling happy about it.
What is this I'm feeling? Someone removed my skin from my body and set fire to my bones. Am I in Hell? This pain, this agony.I get it, I'm being tortured alive. What did I do to cause such affliction? Is this how Christ felt?
* Long lost words whisper slowly to me, still can't find what keeps me here*. Unmotivated to do anything, but energized to commit suicide. Worthless, speechless, paralyzed from the cerebral cortex. The only option is permanent sleep.
I need an escape!! Sex don't alleviate it and shopping isn't reasonable ( I hate life) and the sun is a mockery. There is no light only darkness.*Speaking to the atmosphere no one's here and I fall into myself. This truth drives me into Madness*.
This pain inside me is Gruesome. It's riveting how far I'm willing to go to end this. I look in the mirror, I think I know that person. I'm only familiar with the Grotesque. Songs of Melancholy medicate my soul. I'm in a dark hole. Somehow the Macabre is intriguing and novelty. The dark is to hard to beat!!! I'm not dreaming. My soul is on fire and my nervous system has been subject to punitive suffering. (That's how Depression feel)
Haha yes, now that we’ve won the lottery let’s go back to bed and cry
This is misleadimg. I would. Depression can be situational, and your brain can wire itself to your sitiation. The organ (your mind) is affected by the environment. Wiring and all
I am alive because I am loser that can't even end life, completely coward and clueless
It is a numb sense of life. You can't feel love.
It sounds a lot like being lazy and feeling lazy. Its difficult sometimes when words have such negative connotation. Ive always told people when the topic came up that laziness is just a symptom. I mean tou might feel lazy and procastinate a little but when someone is lazy to the point you they barely take care of themselves, something is wrong and they need help. But the sad thing is, its precisely when people are at that lownpoint that most people dont want to have anything to do with them because they feel that there isnt anything wrong with them, " theyre just lazy". When they try to reach out for help, people just tell them why dont you just do this or that. Basically telling them to just snap out of it and get moving. Sometimes with the right mltivation it cam work but usually it doesnt last, it takes a long time even with effort to finally feel like living again
Take a sleeping pill and try to work a normal life.
Lol this is not depression you can be sad avout a particular thing of your day and having a lot money shouldnt be the powerful reason for your life ro change completely
This is a bad explanation. Comments are much better at explaining it
DUDE..I get you have Depression and other mental health issues but ENOUGH of you already!! I enjoy watching MedCircle and all your guests that have contributed SO much, but HOW many times are you going to make this about you and tell viewers and subscribers about YOU, YOUR issues, YOUR Diagnosis, YOUR past ..it's SO annoying and self serving that I'm not going to watch or subscribe anymore
Have a good one.