I don't agree. People makes mistakes, especially the younger ones. As time passes, things begin to become more clear and we learn with our mistakes. I say that because my ex is 3 years younger than me and is entering the adult life now, so she seems everything different from the reality.
My ex came back after 3 months of him blocking me. He apologized me in person back in 12/14/2021 and I’ve closed the door forever. It’s been 7 months already. I’ll let him enjoy the loss.
@@cloup1592 keep it that way!! Don’t ever contact her. As long as were a good ex, they all come back sooner or later. It could be weeks, months or years.
@@cloup1592 I understand how you feels. But don’t ever contact her unless she contact you. No calls, no texts or stalking her social media. Like i said they all come back “as long as you were good to them” they always come back. Now go out and meet new people.
I watched these videos of months. But I never stayed depressed when she left. You need to show yourself that you are the shit. You need to do the things you love and prove to yourself that you are the main character of your own movie. If you just weep and cry all day nothing is ever gonna change. You need to change and then things will fall into place. Don’t lose hope but also don’t lose yourself. Thank you Chris because now I have her back and I’ve never been happier
I’ve been in the ERP program dealing with the loss of what I thought was a DA partner. Upon researching her odd behaviors, I started to realize that I was actually dealing with a covert narcissist who has DA tendencies. There was mirroring, future faking, and Love bombing then a rapid devaluation and discard. It seemed at first a lot like a DA action, but the behaviors were narcissistic. This is the first video I’ve ever seen that actually tied them together, but my research show that most narcissistic people have a dismissive avoidant attachment style. Good job Chris!
Hi Chris, I am really happy to watch every video that you make. I have a really difficult time to see my ex in his rebound relationship. But after watching your video and buying your book “ungettable”, I am accepting my lost, grieving my pain in healthy way and I am ready to make my self happy again without him. Thankyou so much Chris!!
This video was the best ever!!! I always thought DA and narristic is same, and you are the 1st to make the most perfect video on this, with back up research, your videos are bomb, your very unique and amazing, different from all on youtube, keep up the good work!!! Please make more video on this topic ( narristic and DA personality) very interesting, I think most people suffer cuz they come across with people who have covert narcissistic and DA traits. We need heeling as a community, and you are really good at providing this. GOD 🙌 BLESS
I think the main difference between a narcissist and a DA is that the narcissist is manipulative and consciously/intentionally doing all of this while they view themselves as superior. The DA actually has a low self-esteem, even though they don’t portray that, and I don’t think they’re as manipulative in their behaviors. Their behavior stems from fear, not superiority. There’s definitely some overlap, though, and DAs can definitely exhibit some narcissistic traits.
1. It's Hover not Hoover. 2. Both avoidants are, underlyingly, depressed and deal with self esteem issues. 3. Narcissists are the unhealthy version of DA, whereas the unhealthy mental versions of FAs are usually Borderline and Bipolar. 4. FAs have a pretty realistic view of the world, but in a cynical way - "I know I'm not perfect and can't be trusted, as well as the rest of the world." This creates a negative view of everyone, including oneself, as opposed to being just a negative sense of self. 5. DAs have a unique ability to protect and defend themselves against anxious thoughts, so the appear to think more positively of themselves - but once self aware, are open to the notion that they're not normal and thus start to become depressed (due to not checking life event boxes like those around them). 6. Narcissists are rare. It's highly unlikely you've dated more than one. If you claim to know many and dated many, then you have issues and need to look in the mirror.
Do therapists tell narcissistic people and avoidant personalities that they are doubt this abd that it’s toxic to other people around them? Yes they help them with feelings and help them, but do professionals tell their clients what they are actually doing and how they hurt others? Like are therapists tell avoidants that they are self sabotaging?
What weird is that we had a good relationship bumps in the road which activated triggers mainly on his end but we had an healthy adult conversation to hear one another other we normally gave one another space due to the busyness of our jobs (psychologically time to miss you) but when we ended things we ended amicably on a healthy note & doing our own self healing. Is there a chance we’ll be able to get back to together?
I watched the video and then it really happend: He texted me. I can‘t believe this I deleted his number, deleted his family and friends on social media He literally didn‘t got any information about me I think he saw that I don‘t want him anymore He put so much effort in his text WOW
My ex got into a rebound and he’s engaged to her now I went no contact since the break up we have been apart a year he’s been with her less than a year and he’s engaged! It’s too late right?
Does it make me the avoidant or narcissist if I was the one idealizing, and begging and crying as well as letting him know that he used me, but he's the one that devalued and discarded me?
But I was happy before him, with them too... No pressure o anything.. He decided to move ON.... And expected to move on next day too even he was thinking some time before... Basically he was laying he want to see me more.. He was making me unhappy when he stopped me
Why does my ex still have the gifts I gave her? Why doesn't she get rid of them. Clothes, shoes, stuffed animals, and even letters I wrote her for any special event we ever had.
Not all ex’s come back, and not all have the phantom ex belief. Lastly, there is no such thing as narcissism or narcissist as they are invented atheist based terms rooted in Ancient Greek mythos. Look up the documentaries “The DSM Bible” as well as “Marketing of Madness”.
Never go back to someone who devalued and discarded you for no reason.
I don't agree. People makes mistakes, especially the younger ones. As time passes, things begin to become more clear and we learn with our mistakes. I say that because my ex is 3 years younger than me and is entering the adult life now, so she seems everything different from the reality.
Lol or you get them back by making them work for it but at the end you're just using them for your needs 🤷♂️
So if they devalued you for reason, that’s ok?
My ex came back after 3 months of him blocking me. He apologized me in person back in 12/14/2021 and I’ve closed the door forever. It’s been 7 months already. I’ll let him enjoy the loss.
3 months tomorrow, not a peak from her
@@cloup1592 keep it that way!! Don’t ever contact her. As long as were a good ex, they all come back sooner or later. It could be weeks, months or years.
@@roser8911 I couldn't if I wanted to, I'm blocked everywhere
@@cloup1592 I understand how you feels. But don’t ever contact her unless she contact you. No calls, no texts or stalking her social media. Like i said they all come back “as long as you were good to them” they always come back. Now go out and meet new people.
I’m happy for ya girl! You deserve better! Glad you see that. Congrats Rose 💜
I watched these videos of months. But I never stayed depressed when she left. You need to show yourself that you are the shit. You need to do the things you love and prove to yourself that you are the main character of your own movie. If you just weep and cry all day nothing is ever gonna change. You need to change and then things will fall into place. Don’t lose hope but also don’t lose yourself. Thank you Chris because now I have her back and I’ve never been happier
This gives me hope
I’ve been in the ERP program dealing with the loss of what I thought was a DA partner. Upon researching her odd behaviors, I started to realize that I was actually dealing with a covert narcissist who has DA tendencies. There was mirroring, future faking, and Love bombing then a rapid devaluation and discard. It seemed at first a lot like a DA action, but the behaviors were narcissistic. This is the first video I’ve ever seen that actually tied them together, but my research show that most narcissistic people have a dismissive avoidant attachment style. Good job Chris!
I never went back. :) I have moved on to someone better - thank you.
Hi Chris, I am really happy to watch every video that you make. I have a really difficult time to see my ex in his rebound relationship. But after watching your video and buying your book “ungettable”, I am accepting my lost, grieving my pain in healthy way and I am ready to make my self happy again without him. Thankyou so much Chris!!
I came upon avoidant and that led me down a path to covert narcissist. Yes they overlap ALOT if not almost identical
This video was the best ever!!! I always thought DA and narristic is same, and you are the 1st to make the most perfect video on this, with back up research, your videos are bomb, your very unique and amazing, different from all on youtube, keep up the good work!!! Please make more video on this topic ( narristic and DA personality) very interesting, I think most people suffer cuz they come across with people who have covert narcissistic and DA traits. We need heeling as a community, and you are really good at providing this. GOD 🙌 BLESS
I think the main difference between a narcissist and a DA is that the narcissist is manipulative and consciously/intentionally doing all of this while they view themselves as superior. The DA actually has a low self-esteem, even though they don’t portray that, and I don’t think they’re as manipulative in their behaviors. Their behavior stems from fear, not superiority. There’s definitely some overlap, though, and DAs can definitely exhibit some narcissistic traits.
1. It's Hover not Hoover. 2. Both avoidants are, underlyingly, depressed and deal with self esteem issues. 3. Narcissists are the unhealthy version of DA, whereas the unhealthy mental versions of FAs are usually Borderline and Bipolar. 4. FAs have a pretty realistic view of the world, but in a cynical way - "I know I'm not perfect and can't be trusted, as well as the rest of the world." This creates a negative view of everyone, including oneself, as opposed to being just a negative sense of self. 5. DAs have a unique ability to protect and defend themselves against anxious thoughts, so the appear to think more positively of themselves - but once self aware, are open to the notion that they're not normal and thus start to become depressed (due to not checking life event boxes like those around them). 6. Narcissists are rare. It's highly unlikely you've dated more than one. If you claim to know many and dated many, then you have issues and need to look in the mirror.
Hi Chris: you claim to be a DA. What made it different, with your wife? What made you break the pattern? Thanks!
Do therapists tell narcissistic people and avoidant personalities that they are doubt this abd that it’s toxic to other people around them? Yes they help them with feelings and help them, but do professionals tell their clients what they are actually doing and how they hurt others? Like are therapists tell avoidants that they are self sabotaging?
What weird is that we had a good relationship bumps in the road which activated triggers mainly on his end but we had an healthy adult conversation to hear one another other we normally gave one another space due to the busyness of our jobs (psychologically time to miss you) but when we ended things we ended amicably on a healthy note & doing our own self healing. Is there a chance we’ll be able to get back to together?
I’d say so
I watched the video and then it really happend: He texted me.
I can‘t believe this
I deleted his number, deleted his family and friends on social media
He literally didn‘t got any information about me
I think he saw that I don‘t want him anymore
He put so much effort in his text
WOW
Damn. You nailed it.
My ex got into a rebound and he’s engaged to her now I went no contact since the break up we have been apart a year he’s been with her less than a year and he’s engaged! It’s too late right?
Sounds like he never loved you.
Does it make me the avoidant or narcissist if I was the one idealizing, and begging and crying as well as letting him know that he used me, but he's the one that devalued and discarded me?
Going through the same thing lol
Nope. Imo, you have a anxious attachment style. I would recommend you read the book - Attached.
But I was happy before him, with them too... No pressure o anything.. He decided to move ON.... And expected to move on next day too even he was thinking some time before... Basically he was laying he want to see me more.. He was making me unhappy when he stopped me
Fearful avoidant are narcissist lite
Why does my ex still have the gifts I gave her? Why doesn't she get rid of them. Clothes, shoes, stuffed animals, and even letters I wrote her for any special event we ever had.
Selfishness, you know the drill
This will never happen to me lmaooooo my ex is so stubborn 😂 she randomly followed me on Ig and followed my business page also! Shits too funny lmao
Very similar i cand confirm this dated both...
The videos are packed with a lot of data that explains nothing.
Not all ex’s come back, and not all have the phantom ex belief. Lastly, there is no such thing as narcissism
or narcissist as they are invented atheist based terms rooted in Ancient Greek mythos. Look up the documentaries “The DSM Bible” as well as “Marketing of Madness”.