yep, i have a longtime friend (who honestly i feel like im going to end of dating once i move back to my childhood home in a few months) who you would classify as a ten. shes one of those girls who when you goto the bars she gets pretty much everyone buying her drinks ect... i was curious so i asked her to see her hinge match page. its shocking to see how many matched and likes she gets on a daily basis. and even friends who are still attractive but not tens have a loaded match page. you really dont know how badly the odds are stacked against you if you are not amazing looking. have you noticed how there are no average looking people doing these videos.
They also dislike it when you say "hey" or "how's it going" but then do the same shit themselves even if you put a fair bit of effort into your first message.
@@mistafyremusic I try because I want to find a nice lady at some point. The most annoying thing of all though is the ladies who have a long list of specific traits they want in a man but they themselves are overweight and have 2 kids with 2 guys at 23 and work as a barista at a drive thru coffee shop.
@Curiouser11 I do, trust me. That doesn't mean it isn't annoying. We live in a society in which women feel like they can do whatever the hell they want with no consequences. It's just ridiculous at this point. I'm certain that the real world will one day bite all these idiots in the ass but currently, I just wish it wasn't so difficult to find a good women.
Things to remember. There’s a lot more men than women on dating apps. Women therefore get to pick who they want to be with. Men don’t take photos nearly as much as women so our pictures are usually a pretty bad representation of ourselves
By the numbers, men outnumber women on dating sites 15-20 to one, hence their complaint of little or no responses. Women, on the other hand are getting 5-10 hits daily, of varying quality. But men would be just as picky if it were the other way around.
I’ve definitely used all of these tips on dating apps while staying true to myself. Though, every time I took the conversation off the app, I got “ghosted” after a couple days to a week. I’m never going to use them ever again.
That's what, 80-90% of men? That's my experience, too, even if I chat and vibe with a girl (on IG, so off Tinder) until 3-4 am. They have so many options so you're just one of dozens (at least) so even if you're not desperate, they still know they have the power dynamic, especially on these online platforms, so I don't bother that much anymore. I sometimes swipe if I'm bored before I go to sleep and that's it. If it randomly happens online, so be it. I'm sticking to offline interactions anyway.
Im the same. Made 3 matches in one year. Wtf. I used to make plenty. Now i know who i am and what i want. Real relationships. I now have 2. Sometimes its not worth it, id rather just find real people, but i dont feel i get there either. I make some relationships here and there but i dont ever make the first move. But it is nice to have that conversation with a shopkeeper and others notice
I'm interested if you've ever tried going on a dating app with a male catfish account and see how you got on? A lot of women are shocked at how difficult it really is from the other side
@@EnoI539 True, though there are few who aren't, which is why I tried not to overgeneralize by saying all of them, but still most of them want men to have everything figured out and they think it happens just like that, without much effort.
I did, looking the way I am I'm lucky to get 1 or 2 matches in a month, I wanted to know how much easier would this be if I was ripped, so i took my mates photos with his permission, I have no issue admitting he's way more attractive than me, hits the gym more often, has the muscles and the beard and the tattoos so put his pictures up on my profile with a boring bio and gave it 24 hours, 15 matches in that time span....
I personally believe no matter how well you present yourself girls will judge and then that right there will be the end. It's such bullshit. I'm not saying I'm in PJs but Hoodies and sweats I mean how bad can that be to not get a response
I'm 44 and I'm so glad I had the opportunity to date before smart phones, social media, and dating apps. My heart goes out to all the young guys. You are screwed. Dating was always hard, but it was easier for guys back in the day. For one thing, everywhere you go now, every girl has her face buried in her smart phone. It makes women so much less approachable. When I was young, you could actually talk to a girl in public without feeling like you were interrupting something. Also, back in the day, if a girl rejected you, you just moved on and it sucked. But at least you didn't have to see her posting a million pics on social media of her hooking up with other dudes. And guys, get this....back in the day, THERE WERE NO DATING APPS. In our society, men are expected to take the lead and pursue women. For that reason, women have always had to put in less effort than guys. But back in the day, women at least had to put in SOME effort. They had to at least get dressed and leave the house. And when you talked to a girl in a bar, you were only competing against the other men in that bar. Now, the girl has dozens of guys messaging her on a dating app. Most guys don't stand a chance.
There is a perfectly good reason guys send short first messages. We know that there is a 99.999% chance that the message will not be responded to so the short message is strictly to gauge interest. If she replies with anything, then you can invest the time into writing a longer thought out message.
Exactly, it's a numbers game. The most success I've had on this dating apps is I just message anyone I find even a little attractive with a short simple message. I can message one hundred girls like that in the time I might message 5 if I wrote a long thought out message.
I don't use dating apps myself, but my friends who do usually have a few messages that are their go to and they just copy paste them. So it's really not that much slower
Yep. You cant come up with a witty personalized message for every match with a 1% response rate. Youre going to come up with 100 personalized messages for every single response? Yeah right. This is why you dont take advice from a fish on how to catch a fish. She's never even posed as a man on a dating site to see how it actually works - or... doesnt, I should say. Even f she had, that doesnt mean she'd be any good at it.
I swear I've implemented every piece of advice anyone has ever given on dating apps. Proper photos, good bio, custom messaged all the time only to get no response a vast majority of the time and to only go on 3 coffee dates in 4 years and I only went on those coffee dates because I thought maybe I'm being too picky, I wasn't. Dating apps for men suck. Women think men judge them harshly but we all know it's the other way around.
*A clear, high-quality profile pic that shows you doing something you enjoy (like hiking or cooking) instantly tells a story and makes you stand out. No need to look like a model - just show a bit of your personality!*
I never done dating apps, because there's so many I don't know which is the best. I always been a person who prefers to meet someone randomly or in person because I believe that's how real butterflies and feelings happen. I have met relationships through social media but personally I like having the confidence in finding someone in the real world.
@@jackr2287 A swing club is going to be pretty brutal for single guys. They pay crazy gendered premiums just to get through the door, which is a good indicator of how wanted they are. I'd say join a running club, or some sort of pickup sport women tend to like such as volleyball, or kickball. Casual stuff, but something relatively active women are going to be into.
@@mrvanntabulous I threw it out there as an example. Pick something where there's a reasonable chance of encountering a gal your age and of your interest.
I work full time as a grocery store manager, overnight, since I'm also full time military. When I'm not at work, I'm at the gym at least 3 hours every single day. Every weekend I like to take trips to the Bahamas via a cruise or endurance swimming. Looking for a 7 foot, independent midget ginger with blonde hair and has a third for us.
When my ex gf split up with me, on the way home I let Spotify play random music. The first words I heard were "Leave her, Johny, leave her...". I took it like a omen and felt quite better after that
I find it challengnig. It forces me to take better photos, I puts me on the track. I kind of like that aspect. But definitely too much laboring to get an average girl
Did everything you suggested. Gave it a full month. Sent roughly 200 messages so far. Each one containing some form of a creatively crafted question designed around the interests in her profile. Each message took me about 5 minutes to create, this does not include the time it took me to research her profile and then determine what interest to focus on. This amounted to over 16 hours of my life. Spent almost two hours finagling my phone so it could be propped up exactly right to frame me well, there wasn't much room for finesse in the pics, so I had to take dozens and dozens at different angles with different positions of the phone until I got enough that looked good. Oh, wait, no...that took me longer, cause I had to do a wardrobe/location change...4 pictures in the same setting with the same clothes, can't have that. SO, 3 hours on pics. I spent another two hours crafting my bio and didn't quite know how long or short it should have been in order to get the arbitrary approval of a random woman. I also didn't quite know which of my hobbies this random woman would not approve of. This is definitely the weak part of my efforts, I admit. I should have dedicated more of my time to predicting exactly what every single woman would like me to be. The result of my 20+ hours of effort? Zero responses. 2 views on my profile. I'd like to discuss the amount of things I could have accomplished in 20+ hours, but I'm already writing a novel. Let's go with: a lot. I'd like to just send more messages, quantity over quality always works, right? But I'm running out of women in any kind of acceptable mile radius. I'd rather not try to date someone 300+ miles away, ya? I know, I know, I shouldn't be picky...my fault. I guess I'll just make another pass and try not to have any standards for looks, personality, age, profession, children, pets, distance, humor, intelligence or compatibility. No. Wait. Even better. I'll go to a *different* dating website and repeat this entire process, THAT'S what I'll do. Thanks so much! Your tips were a GODSEND, I can't wait to meet a woman who approves of my 4 pictures and 1 paragraph enough to spend 2 minutes replying to a message but that's asking a lot of her, I certainly don't want her to put any amount of effort into this. I've got another 10-15 years left in my prime, I sure hope it happens soon but I definitely need to do a better job if I want to have the *luxury* of starting a family before I'm 50. Also, don't worry, if I do finally manage to talk to a woman and she completely disrespects me, ignores me or dunks on me, I will not in any way, shape or form be upset. It's not like, at that point, I will have sunk days of my life away at this. I actually don't have any feelings, thoughts, emotions, dreams or hopes, so, it's going to be a great experience for her. She'll be able to shit all over me in a matter of moments and get right back to perusing her personal meat market with zero social consequences. But I'm SUPER glad you decided to add that tip at the end, it'll really help me focus on making her online dating experience that much better *after* she's already spit in my virtual face, that's the REAL reason I clicked on your video. #blessed.
Hold on. Don't blame Courtney for this. She IS a wonderful woman, and you'd be lucky to have her as a wife. She is humble and she is realistic. She gives honest advice to men and women and says things like they are. She is the sweetest person I know of as a public figure, she doesn't let fame get to her head like other people do. She doesn't even demand for money. She just wants to give helpful insight. So with that aside. I agree with everything else. The silent pain delivered by the words of your experience resonate within me. I am serious. I can verify your testimony as the cold hard truth of going the extra mile to not even get one extra grain of salt. Just depends if you are lucky are not. Or good looking. But please, do not blame Courtney for this and direct this condescending tone to her like she guaranteed something. She clearly stated that she is no magician, and you know that. She shouldn't have to state that anyway. She is giving you her best advice, this is what you can do. But you can't blame her for the outcome of your trials. Nor can I. Nor can anyone else. You can't even blame God. Life just sucks sometimes. But I'll say this. You still don't know what could happen tomorrow. This negative complaint, although very true and valid, will not render any positive feedback to any girls. Let them be the way they are. You just keep on with life. If you have to give up on dating apps, so be it. If you choose to try again, I urge you to see what more you can do, even if it seems fruitless. Have the mind of an entrepreneur. Good things can be a real pain in the butt to obtain sometimes. Whether you seek to mingle with someone in the virtual world or in the every-day bustle face to face. This is life. It delivers scum sandwiches sometimes. It is not fair. But God, is still good. He sent His only Son to pardon you and me of our wretched sin. His gift of grace is relentless and His love is unfailing. The trials of life are a result of man's sin in the Garden. It's our faults for disobeying God's solemn commands. And everyone is guilty. Seek Jesus. Seek Him in Prayer, and no matter how hard life is, don't blame Him. And don't someone else for something they didn't do. God's goodness abounds beyond the fall of Creation. He is above all. For who He is and the love that He pours out for mankind. Not in a way we may perceive as "loving" but His love covered a price we cannot cover with any effort on our part. Sorry I ended up preaching. But let the Good News be known. Don't blame Courtney for this though. I know it's hard. I am in the same boat. But press on. Life goes on. Just pray without ceasing, and despite the outcome, Jesus is Lord.
Avoid at all costs. There is way too much bait and switch going on in dating apps. Meet in the streets or at the grocery store. You'll get a better idea of the person, and you won't be wasting time
Best tip for dating apps is don't use them. It's a really shallow environment and the people on them have the personalities of goldfish and 9 times out of 10 they're on the app for a reason. Meeting women out in the real world will always be a better experience.
I don't know about that. So many women these days are "woke" and "liberal". If you even look at a woman wrong, you might find yourself at the center of a sexual harassment suit. You just can't trust them. I prefer "escorts".
I've come to realise that approaching girls online isn't for me. It feels so unnatural and awkward to try to present yourself and seem interesting to someone who you've never met before through text messages.
girls hate when you're a try hard and you literally can't not be a try hard when you're swiping and trying to prove your value with pictures and messages
I have been on dating apps and I have a few tips for women: 1. Please post pictures alone, I hate scrolling through 5 pics and trying to mentally figure out who is you 2. Post pictures of doing cool things like hiking, zip-lining etc 3. Don't post pics with your tongue out, that makes you look trashy 4. All you photos shouldn't be selifes in your bathroom, that is lame 5. Have a picture with your most of you body in it. If it looks like you're hiding your figure 6. When you do match with a guy, don't start asking probing questions on say things critical of him: - I got a girl message me saying : _Why do you look unenthused in most of your pictures._ - I got another message with a girl acting surprised, and when I asked why: she assumed that I only dated Asian women, I didn't post anything saying a preferred Asian women and I had one picture with an Asian friend when I was in my Captain America Halloween costume. This is just my experience. Oh and guys, dating apps give you many options so be picky on who you go out with.
I'm attractive and even that don't work I'm always getting likes but I don't say nothing so entertaining that they don't ever reply back. Women think men now are their personal jesters we have to entertain them or we are out it's stupid.
3# Turn off for women, opening with "Hi", "Hey", or "Hello." Women's first words, "Hi", "Hey", and "Hello." I can post a dozen screen shots to back this up.
The ONLY thing REALLY missing in the conversation on dating apps is highlighing the different experiences of men and women. There's ALREADY huge emphasis on the issues faced by women from arseholes, or the sheer volume of attention... but DAMNED few people even appreciate that "just try harder" sucks as an answer, even if it is correct. When women CONSISTENTLY complain about the volume and quality of attention they get (and it is NOT just "tens." I know first hand VERY average women who are insecure as ALL hell also receive ENORMOUS volumes of attention. I honestly think it fuels women's insecurities, as they likely don't feel they deserve it & that it's somehow an expression of ulterior motive from men) There's just very little appreciation and even less sympathy for the fact guys have to work hard to even be SEEN. And then there's some HUGE cultural pressure on men that any attention they DO receive should be reciprocated, or they're "entitled" I know I'll sound judgemental, but I'll go through dating sites and see profile after profile of overweight single mothers with a laundry list of demands for a partner. Some of these women I even feel are worth talking to (there's nothing wrong with motherhood, some women carry weight well & I don't like to judge profiles on tone (maybe they have reasonable cause?) From demanding men over 6 foot, to complaining about fuckbois (on their profile page) to saying "no gamers" or "my kids come first" (which always makes me question it. Who needs to SAY that? On a DATING site?) I can not IMAGINE the reaction of women is men's profiles listed "no fat chicks" or similar, but it's TOTALLY normal the other way around because there will ALWAYS be enough male attention. (the nice women will at least make it a fun point. "I'm tall and I like to wear heels" is a common one, and to me that's fair. They're putting their preference on them, not projecting it onto guys)
@@Chris-de2qc So, the attitude of "life isn't fair, but do the best you can" is an attitude that won't work, but people should follow your advice and do precisely that? At no point do I suggest otherwise. Is your advice that ADMITTING that life isn't fair and you should just do the best you can is a bad thing? So, honesty is bad?
I won't do dating apps. Way too many women lie there and I've been around too many Newport Beach women who are pretending to be good girls to the guy they like while hooking up with several guys on the side because they can... Tinder is known as a hookup app. A girl may say she's not there for that but hey, when everything in the candy store is free, maybe an occasional lollipop, nobody has to know, right!? I've had my best success since I started hiking and climbing. The girls are fit, too busy for dating apps and enjoy the outdoors but that's not for everyone! And I disagree, I think the dating apps aren't here to stay. I think people will mature, realize how this is all addicting and the pendulum will swing the other way.
Why is it ok for girls to say “hi, hello, what’s up?” But boys aren’t? Why do we have to put all the effort in when it comes to texting? Why do we have to text them first?
Also, I get why why posting mirror selfies can be considered narcissistic but girls post bikini photos as first picture all the time but apparently that's justified haha.
dating apps can destroy a mans confidence getting rejected 99% of the time you send a message and women just don't seem to give you a chance to show them how good for them you can be why I don't know but surely they should give more men the chance to prove themselves
Courtney, quick question: so i noticed some girls have their fb profile on their bios. if it's someone you really think you can click with, what do you think of straight up skipping waiting for a match, going straight to her fb, leaving a couple of comments on her pictures and see what goes from there? or just messaging her being straight up honest like: "hey saw your tinder bio, don't really like the app that much and decided to bypass it and leave a message here, should you wanna chat". something along those lines. what are your thoughts on this? in my mind it could show initiative and that you don't settle to "waiting in line" for a match to initiate a conversation
Advice from apps suggest staying on the app as long as possible because there are so many scammers that want personal info. I have only been doing dating apps a month or so. I don't respond to smiles or comments about my appearance.As a woman I look for someone who actually has read my profile and can engage with me in real conversation. If a car, cap, baby, fish , dead deer, or pet appears in the photos I know they are not for me. Also the mention of a beloved spouse in the profile that has died makes me think they are still deep in grief and not ready to move on. One guy I met wept in my car. Thanks for the video.
Some of those photo dos and don'ts should also apply to women on dating apps as well. Some women's profiles have mostly photos of the woman with a friend(s) (sometimes they have the same hair color and look like they go tanning together, I'm thinking "Why are you hiding from me?").
I'm 44 years old. My heart goes out to all the young guys trying to date in this modern shit show. I had success with women in my 20s. I was married for most of my 30s. At age 40, my wife cheated on me and I divorced her. I won't lie....it's been rough and very lonely. I feel lucky though, that I got to live out my young dating life before smart phones, dating apps, and social media. As hard as it was when I was young, when you were lonely, it sucked, but at least you didn't log into Facebook and Instagram and see a million pictures of all the girls that rejected you partying and hooking up with guys. At least every girl you saw on the train, bus, ferry, park bench, etc. didn't have her face in her phone and was more approachable. When you flirted with women in bars, you had a better chance because she didn't also have 15 other guys messaging her on a dating app. Re-entering the dating world over 40 has just been terrible....and I look young for my age.
You and I are alike. After being married to a narcissist for 10 years, we divorced, and I realized how much happier I am without that shit. Learn to make your own happiness as a single man, without relying on a woman.
Your sincerity makes men like me understand women better and have more confidence with ease. Thank you for being on point and sharing your experiences for all of us. Please never change who you are, Courtney. 🌹
@@EricWakefield-ls9ph Thanks, but I’d love to say that the woman who is to be with me must love God first and even without me. It is God who instituted the family and the one who can bless me with who He finds suitable for me according to His will, not mine. ♥️ 🕊️
@@kibawhitefang7176 AMEN! and He is so worthy! God is the ultimate founder of family like you said, and His Word is clear on the roles that husbands, wives, children, and siblings must obey. For our own good. I think you will find one likeminded, there are a lot of good hearted girls who love the Lord. It is hard to find but they are sure out there. So since you made that comment 3 years ago, how have things changed for you since then? or what is different from then compared to now?
Click on her profile her video thumbnails & titles are about all the same, she has no personality and her advise is constantly also the same explaining features about guys or women rather than focussing also on personality and romance. I'm unsubscribing, I've been on here for months. If she would laugh, smile big, and cut jokes here and there and not be soo like robotic I would be more interested. I'm not simping for her views anymore lol
Women need to get away from the idea that they should sit there like perfect princesses waiting to be entertained by men who craft just the perfect message. True, there are many bad actors out there but women can be sadistic.
My online dating experience, here's something I wrote, "Yeah, this online dating thing is strange. So far my experience is like this. When a woman likes me, she likes me, the talk is romantic, but the cart is going before the horse. Because the truth is, anyone I meet is a complete stranger who has romantic feelings, and so long as I don't talk about things I think are important with my life, things go fine. But as soon as the reality of who I am gets shared, things go bad. It seems the window of what's acceptable by women is more fantasy than anything, so I'm better off just not having an opinion on anything real. That seems to be the only way to obtain a relationship. Mostly the women that like me, like that I'm a artist, who knows about spirituality. So they view me as some sort of spiritual artist architype,,, then they get to know me, and well I'm not an architype, I'm an individual, I have my own thoughts, and the fantasy is dispelled. Overall, it's nice to meet people, it's not fun sharing personal stuff with strangers so they can judge." She blocked me after this. I guess I said something too true. Is it me, or do women just have the privilege to choose the man that does a song and dance, then later he gets called a liar, because the song and dance is a lie. But when a man is honest, she learns the lie is all she wants. Is this female toxicity? Or do just need to be a better person?
I've concluded that after being on these apps way longer than i had hoped over the course of my life, your messages don't matter AT ALL. The girls that I've actually struck up conversation and / or went on dates with either reached out first or matched with me just liking their photo with no message.
I haven’t been successful at Dating apps but what I have found is using context to wrangle up a conversation tend to go a long way, especially if she doesn’t see it coming.
I personally don’t want to ever resort to a dating app. I just want to be out one day and find the most beautiful woman ever. I’m not saying dating apps are bad because congrats on meeting the love of your life on a dating app, but I personally just don’t want to use a dating app. As happy as I would to find out that a girl swiped right on me, I would still be sad because I had to resort to this. Either IRL, or no one at all (for me anyway)
Any recommendations for someone who doesnt take pictures by themselves? Are you supposed to awkwardly crop them? Or can you post a bunch of pictures but with different people so it's obvious you are the one on the dating app? Great tips! Glad to see you're back!
@@CourtneyRyan well now I want to draw big silly french pink mustaches on everyone except me because that would work too technically and because I cant take dating apps seriously
I hear success stories from net dating, but it is like (anecdotal) 1 person out of 100 that has met their dream match 💁♂️ I feel sometimes, it is marketed as something that men would like, but in reality it is intended for your suffering 💁♂️
Do you as a woman recommend that a man wears a pink shirt for a profile picture? I'm perfectly comfortable wearing pink, as I do so every Wednesday. Yes, it's because of Mean Girls. Would you advise against it or for it? Please give me your honest opinion. Thank you.
Hey Courtney as a man asking this would you recommend posting on the bio “not interested in hookups” if your attentions are in fact to build a genuine long term relationship?
"don't send hi, hey, hello" ah, from what I've seen my attractive friends always send hi, hey hello, and guess what they get replies back, Courtney just end the bullsh*t, and get straight to the point, your advice doesn't work, if a guys attractive they can say whatever they want to a female and get replies, if their not attractive they can use your advice and get NOTHING, end this nonesence and just get straight to the point, stop selling guys hopes and dreams
Best dating app advice is don’t rely on dating apps if your a man. For the average man your gonna get like one match outta every 100 women. And the women you match with has 10 other options in her dms.
You know women could try being less picky, I really feel like there's a lot of expectations from people who preach not to expect things. And the female criticism is never ending... You do a really good job of telling us what is unattractive but I've never heard somebody I was dating say that I was attractive in any way.....
Keep any communication brief and far apart- at least a couple days… also, if a woman has a good body, there will be a full body picture in her photos- if there is not- there’s a reason- and it’s never a good reason.
Love your videos Courtney. But I disagree with the usage of dating apps for men. I’ve been told im very good looking and good physique with a good personality often (not blowing my own trumpet just being honest) but even then I get ghosted, ignored and cast aside so much on them. Which can be a huge knock on a man’s confidence and self esteem. Whereas every time I’ve met someone in person they lasted much longer and were more meaningful. Not putting down anyone lucky enough to get into a good relationship from dating apps, but I would just recommend avoiding at all costs. You give very good tips but overall dating apps aren’t a great experience
One of the most dependable things I have learned is that what women say versus what they mean or want are nearly unrelated. Men are the opposite while also being the "pursuers". Learn to value what gets results, not their explanations. Of course some women have more self awareness but don't count on it haha. Another thing is to study "sales "and apply the lessons there (if you are able to on your own make useful connections).
I have tried Tinder Once and it was a horrible experience. I didn't get a single match for 2 days and the matches I did get were of 2 profiles the first one I messaged said she had accidentally swiped right and the 2nd one turned out to Be a He.
I mostly agree with your tips. But, maybe you should make one of these for women too. A lot of women will only have pics of themselves from the chest up and almost falling out of their shirt while their bio reads "no hook ups" or "where are all the real men". I have talked to several friends on dating apps and like myself they are lucky to get 1 match a month and no matter how much or little the first msg is to her contains 99% of the time she never responds. My friends and I are above average looking in our 40's, according to some of our female counterpart friends. But we are not the 'Alphas' 9's or 10's that most of these women are thinking they deserve. A lot of women are also very bad at having only group photos and photos with their children in them. I'm sorry but children do not belong in dating app photos, it's fine to say you have children and their ages. But keep them out or block them out with photo editing. I could go on but won't. Thanks for your insight.
I think dating apps are a lot like going for or applying for a job or a job interview. You need to try and make a good impression and truefull version of yourself from the start
What seemed to help me as a very average looking guy is having like 3 good pictures and then a very basic profil weirdly enough too much info seems to be a turn off
First time on a dating app. What’s proper etiquette as far as messages go? Do you just not answer a message if your not interested? Some are so far away, I’m not investing time and money to drive over an hour away! Some of these women are really pretty and can pretty much pick and choose any man in a room! So it’s kind of a red flag to me, that they are single and on a dating app! Thoughts anyone?
I've never used a dating app but I can relate to some of the points you're making. But then again, I also understand why Chads are sending "hey" messages and use shirtless pics as profilepic when there's a 2:1 ratio of men on dating apps, they have to initiate conversation and still have a rejection rate far higher then the other way around. At some point Chads gonna be Chads writing to 100 girls a night and if just one of them hooks up with them it's mission accomplished for them. And that's if you're a good looking Chad. If you're avarage looking all you can do is hope and be humorous about the whole dating thing. I'd rather not do any of this.
On the sore loser tip, I donnow, why do you care if you're an asshole, that person's a stranger you will likely never ever meet, you owe them no courtesy and gain nothing by giving courtesy. I've felt bad for turning down girls in the past, why shouldn't that be the case for everyone else. Functionally speaking I don't care, if you don't like me and you give me a clown reason, I WILL treat you like a clown and make you feel bad. If I HAVE to deal with 100 rejections I'd rather make fun of 50 of them for my own sanity. Between me feeling bad out of an interraction or stranger I don't care about feeling bad, I choose the stranger, I don't care, I'm selfish like that, I will do anything to keep my mental health.
Thanks a lot for your thoughtful and honest tips. On a personal note : your voice is very pleasant and soothing. I also like the fact that your makep matches your haircolor :)
Personally I am really ‘traditional’ about meeting people so I haven’t never gone into the dating app bandwagon. If i were to, I know safely that I have picked up a few great tips from you through this video. Thank you again :)
I've been to too many weddings where the bride and groom have met on tinder to know it's not a fluke and that online dating works, the tools at most men's disposal to catch anything other than *crap* just aren't available, even in the paid versions of these apps.
Let's be honest, most women aren't even going to bother to read your bio unless she sees your photo and wants to learn more. You can say the wittiest thing but it will go unnoticed if you don't pass the initial screentest.
Same thing dude, women never drop their unreachable standards at any age, maybe when they get older like 40, and are desperate maybe they will go for others, but just use the same old same old, be attractive and that's it
The reason men copy and paste or send short messages is because we are tired of writing customized messages to each woman only to get no responses.
Exactly... I only come up with something unique to say if they are hockey fans, have a picture paddle-boarding or have a dog breed I used to have.
I am only tired of 'fishing' after details on a emty profil.
There is mostly no Eifel Tower in the pictures. ^^
Exactly...
For real, you put some thought into and still get nothing. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.
So truth
Every girl's first message on bumble: "Hi, how are you?"
A complete sentence. That's more than usual.
A message from a girl is rare anyway
"hey"
Try "Hey" or a "wave" emoji
Those messages come from Bots.. Not real women
i made a statistic on an excel sheet. from 100 women 64 wrote me only "hey" or "hi" on humble.
The problem is that women get so much attention that dating apps just doesnt work for majority of men
100% correct
yep, i have a longtime friend (who honestly i feel like im going to end of dating once i move back to my childhood home in a few months) who you would classify as a ten. shes one of those girls who when you goto the bars she gets pretty much everyone buying her drinks ect... i was curious so i asked her to see her hinge match page. its shocking to see how many matched and likes she gets on a daily basis. and even friends who are still attractive but not tens have a loaded match page. you really dont know how badly the odds are stacked against you if you are not amazing looking. have you noticed how there are no average looking people doing these videos.
Thats why you gotta max your looks and be ready to wait weeks before you find a girl who wants to go out with you if you're not on the top 10%
@@huebothedog665 weeks? Years would be more accurate
@@lifemocker85 get better pics
Women dislike it when guys take selfies, while taking selfies of their own.
It will never be fair 🙁
They also dislike it when you say "hey" or "how's it going" but then do the same shit themselves even if you put a fair bit of effort into your first message.
@@jurisprudence6549 why do we even try? the whole script needs to be flipped and dudes need to stop simping
@@mistafyremusic I try because I want to find a nice lady at some point. The most annoying thing of all though is the ladies who have a long list of specific traits they want in a man but they themselves are overweight and have 2 kids with 2 guys at 23 and work as a barista at a drive thru coffee shop.
@Curiouser11 I do, trust me. That doesn't mean it isn't annoying. We live in a society in which women feel like they can do whatever the hell they want with no consequences. It's just ridiculous at this point. I'm certain that the real world will one day bite all these idiots in the ass but currently, I just wish it wasn't so difficult to find a good women.
Life is sexist
Things to remember.
There’s a lot more men than women on dating apps. Women therefore get to pick who they want to be with.
Men don’t take photos nearly as much as women so our pictures are usually a pretty bad representation of ourselves
😂😂😂😂Ah man, this is so true
Yeah you can be a decent looking guy (which I am) but if you have bad photos or mediocre, good luck
Nailed it!!
By the numbers, men outnumber women on dating sites 15-20 to one, hence their complaint of little or no responses. Women, on the other hand are getting 5-10 hits daily, of varying quality. But men would be just as picky if it were the other way around.
I’ve definitely used all of these tips on dating apps while staying true to myself. Though, every time I took the conversation off the app, I got “ghosted” after a couple days to a week. I’m never going to use them ever again.
Yeah man ! This is the reality. Don’t listen to this dating coach bullshit 🤣 Reality is 20 % of hot guys pull on dating app ...
That's what, 80-90% of men? That's my experience, too, even if I chat and vibe with a girl (on IG, so off Tinder) until 3-4 am. They have so many options so you're just one of dozens (at least) so even if you're not desperate, they still know they have the power dynamic, especially on these online platforms, so I don't bother that much anymore. I sometimes swipe if I'm bored before I go to sleep and that's it. If it randomly happens online, so be it. I'm sticking to offline interactions anyway.
@@Incognit0777 I totally agree with you!!
Im the same. Made 3 matches in one year. Wtf. I used to make plenty. Now i know who i am and what i want. Real relationships. I now have 2. Sometimes its not worth it, id rather just find real people, but i dont feel i get there either. I make some relationships here and there but i dont ever make the first move. But it is nice to have that conversation with a shopkeeper and others notice
@@JulioRodriguezDeAngeles just don't use them, they are toxic as fk. Work on yourself instead
I'm interested if you've ever tried going on a dating app with a male catfish account and see how you got on? A lot of women are shocked at how difficult it really is from the other side
Yeah, the oblivious among them think it's the same, lol.
@@Incognit0777 women are oblivious to a man's problems
@@EnoI539
True, though there are few who aren't, which is why I tried not to overgeneralize by saying all of them, but still most of them want men to have everything figured out and they think it happens just like that, without much effort.
A few good content creators have and shared it. The woman gets really depressed and frustrated.
I did, looking the way I am I'm lucky to get 1 or 2 matches in a month, I wanted to know how much easier would this be if I was ripped, so i took my mates photos with his permission, I have no issue admitting he's way more attractive than me, hits the gym more often, has the muscles and the beard and the tattoos so put his pictures up on my profile with a boring bio and gave it 24 hours, 15 matches in that time span....
The only tips you need for online dating (and dating in general): Be attractive and don’t be unattractive.
Yeah I know. But we all know. Just kidding. Its easy to be who you are, and not worry too much. They like that, but its like that too.
Have a handsome face, a decent body, and finally, have a handsome face
Yep, just have to follow rules 1 and 2
I personally believe no matter how well you present yourself girls will judge and then that right there will be the end. It's such bullshit. I'm not saying I'm in PJs but Hoodies and sweats I mean how bad can that be to not get a response
@@redrich7679 hoodies and sweats? Yeah, thats not the best idea
My matches are usually missing teeth, and eating a triple cheeseburger.
Why did you swipe right on them in the first place
@@huebothedog665 Apps like hinge show you who liked your pics before you match with them
same bro same, dont forget arm tatts and face piercings. Online dating only works for guys with low standards
🤣😂🤣😂☠💀
haha
I'm 44 and I'm so glad I had the opportunity to date before smart phones, social media, and dating apps. My heart goes out to all the young guys. You are screwed. Dating was always hard, but it was easier for guys back in the day. For one thing, everywhere you go now, every girl has her face buried in her smart phone. It makes women so much less approachable. When I was young, you could actually talk to a girl in public without feeling like you were interrupting something. Also, back in the day, if a girl rejected you, you just moved on and it sucked. But at least you didn't have to see her posting a million pics on social media of her hooking up with other dudes. And guys, get this....back in the day, THERE WERE NO DATING APPS. In our society, men are expected to take the lead and pursue women. For that reason, women have always had to put in less effort than guys. But back in the day, women at least had to put in SOME effort. They had to at least get dressed and leave the house. And when you talked to a girl in a bar, you were only competing against the other men in that bar. Now, the girl has dozens of guys messaging her on a dating app. Most guys don't stand a chance.
Brad, George, Denzel, and Harrison would have a chance, I'll bet.
There is a perfectly good reason guys send short first messages. We know that there is a 99.999% chance that the message will not be responded to so the short message is strictly to gauge interest. If she replies with anything, then you can invest the time into writing a longer thought out message.
Exactly, it's a numbers game. The most success I've had on this dating apps is I just message anyone I find even a little attractive with a short simple message. I can message one hundred girls like that in the time I might message 5 if I wrote a long thought out message.
I don't use dating apps myself, but my friends who do usually have a few messages that are their go to and they just copy paste them. So it's really not that much slower
Yep. You cant come up with a witty personalized message for every match with a 1% response rate. Youre going to come up with 100 personalized messages for every single response? Yeah right. This is why you dont take advice from a fish on how to catch a fish. She's never even posed as a man on a dating site to see how it actually works - or... doesnt, I should say. Even f she had, that doesnt mean she'd be any good at it.
The women say to “read my bio and be creative.” So I do. No response. That got old after the 15th time.
Facts I agree w and yes I'm a man
I swear I've implemented every piece of advice anyone has ever given on dating apps. Proper photos, good bio, custom messaged all the time only to get no response a vast majority of the time and to only go on 3 coffee dates in 4 years and I only went on those coffee dates because I thought maybe I'm being too picky, I wasn't. Dating apps for men suck. Women think men judge them harshly but we all know it's the other way around.
learn the dating app algorithms
@@Chris-de2qc You have got to be kidding me?! I'm not playing the developers game. I'd rather play real life.
@@HeyHerdy ok I shared with you the way. If you don't want to learn it to help you idk.best of luck
Pay for Platinum, get in shape, make photos that look good and natural and have a decent bio and text game. Its rly not that bad
@@justhair17 Screw that, I'll just work on myself, I'm tired of the online dating bullshit.
*A clear, high-quality profile pic that shows you doing something you enjoy (like hiking or cooking) instantly tells a story and makes you stand out. No need to look like a model - just show a bit of your personality!*
Swipe left on shirtless gym pics guys, swipe right if they used kahma though - now THATS classy!
I never done dating apps, because there's so many I don't know which is the best. I always been a person who prefers to meet someone randomly or in person because I believe that's how real butterflies and feelings happen. I have met relationships through social media but personally I like having the confidence in finding someone in the real world.
Here's a tip for the guys. If you want to retain a shred of dignity, and not destroy your sense of self worth, don't use dating apps
Exactly
Or if rural, and the price of gas is quite high in [current year] perhaps see if there's a swing club or something....
@@jackr2287 A swing club is going to be pretty brutal for single guys. They pay crazy gendered premiums just to get through the door, which is a good indicator of how wanted they are. I'd say join a running club, or some sort of pickup sport women tend to like such as volleyball, or kickball. Casual stuff, but something relatively active women are going to be into.
@@mrvanntabulous I threw it out there as an example. Pick something where there's a reasonable chance of encountering a gal your age and of your interest.
Calm down lol
I work full time as a grocery store manager, overnight, since I'm also full time military. When I'm not at work, I'm at the gym at least 3 hours every single day. Every weekend I like to take trips to the Bahamas via a cruise or endurance swimming. Looking for a 7 foot, independent midget ginger with blonde hair and has a third for us.
🤣
Lemme save y’all some time, don’t use dating apps, no matter how desperate ya might feel
Truth
I prefer to speak to women in real life because it’s more fun to me and you basically cut in front of the dudes in her DMs.
Just go your own way
Unless your a chad or above average in looks make good money and knows how to rizz woman
If only there were more Courtney's on Tinder lol.
Lol 😂👏🏼
Good luck with that
@Eric V Yea You want a women like Courtney. Good luck she’s only going to date pretty boys and rich guys.
@Eric V Too many Stacey's and Tiffany's
Theyre chasing only the top 10%
🎶Leave her, Johnny, leave her
Oh, leave her, Johnny, leave her
For the voyage is long and the winds don't blow
And it's time for us to leave her🎶
black flag rocks
Loved black flag
When my ex gf split up with me, on the way home I let Spotify play random music. The first words I heard were "Leave her, Johny, leave her...". I took it like a omen and felt quite better after that
Using a dating app sounds like a part-time job.😤
It can be a real pain in the ass
@@richharris9489 *it is
yeah except you lose money and get low tier quality matches
I find it challengnig. It forces me to take better photos, I puts me on the track. I kind of like that aspect. But definitely too much laboring to get an average girl
At least you get something out of a job in the form of a paycheck.
Did everything you suggested. Gave it a full month. Sent roughly 200 messages so far. Each one containing some form of a creatively crafted question designed around the interests in her profile. Each message took me about 5 minutes to create, this does not include the time it took me to research her profile and then determine what interest to focus on. This amounted to over 16 hours of my life. Spent almost two hours finagling my phone so it could be propped up exactly right to frame me well, there wasn't much room for finesse in the pics, so I had to take dozens and dozens at different angles with different positions of the phone until I got enough that looked good. Oh, wait, no...that took me longer, cause I had to do a wardrobe/location change...4 pictures in the same setting with the same clothes, can't have that. SO, 3 hours on pics. I spent another two hours crafting my bio and didn't quite know how long or short it should have been in order to get the arbitrary approval of a random woman. I also didn't quite know which of my hobbies this random woman would not approve of. This is definitely the weak part of my efforts, I admit. I should have dedicated more of my time to predicting exactly what every single woman would like me to be.
The result of my 20+ hours of effort?
Zero responses.
2 views on my profile.
I'd like to discuss the amount of things I could have accomplished in 20+ hours, but I'm already writing a novel. Let's go with: a lot.
I'd like to just send more messages, quantity over quality always works, right? But I'm running out of women in any kind of acceptable mile radius. I'd rather not try to date someone 300+ miles away, ya? I know, I know, I shouldn't be picky...my fault. I guess I'll just make another pass and try not to have any standards for looks, personality, age, profession, children, pets, distance, humor, intelligence or compatibility.
No. Wait. Even better. I'll go to a *different* dating website and repeat this entire process, THAT'S what I'll do.
Thanks so much! Your tips were a GODSEND, I can't wait to meet a woman who approves of my 4 pictures and 1 paragraph enough to spend 2 minutes replying to a message but that's asking a lot of her, I certainly don't want her to put any amount of effort into this. I've got another 10-15 years left in my prime, I sure hope it happens soon but I definitely need to do a better job if I want to have the *luxury* of starting a family before I'm 50. Also, don't worry, if I do finally manage to talk to a woman and she completely disrespects me, ignores me or dunks on me, I will not in any way, shape or form be upset. It's not like, at that point, I will have sunk days of my life away at this. I actually don't have any feelings, thoughts, emotions, dreams or hopes, so, it's going to be a great experience for her. She'll be able to shit all over me in a matter of moments and get right back to perusing her personal meat market with zero social consequences. But I'm SUPER glad you decided to add that tip at the end, it'll really help me focus on making her online dating experience that much better *after* she's already spit in my virtual face, that's the REAL reason I clicked on your video. #blessed.
The common phrase for non-results as in your case is, "Well, that's 20 hours I'll never get back."
I feel ya, brother. Why not just use your money on "escorts" instead? Screw online dating...
Hold on. Don't blame Courtney for this. She IS a wonderful woman, and you'd be lucky to have her as a wife. She is humble and she is realistic. She gives honest advice to men and women and says things like they are. She is the sweetest person I know of as a public figure, she doesn't let fame get to her head like other people do. She doesn't even demand for money. She just wants to give helpful insight.
So with that aside. I agree with everything else. The silent pain delivered by the words of your experience resonate within me. I am serious. I can verify your testimony as the cold hard truth of going the extra mile to not even get one extra grain of salt. Just depends if you are lucky are not. Or good looking.
But please, do not blame Courtney for this and direct this condescending tone to her like she guaranteed something. She clearly stated that she is no magician, and you know that. She shouldn't have to state that anyway. She is giving you her best advice, this is what you can do. But you can't blame her for the outcome of your trials. Nor can I. Nor can anyone else. You can't even blame God. Life just sucks sometimes. But I'll say this. You still don't know what could happen tomorrow.
This negative complaint, although very true and valid, will not render any positive feedback to any girls. Let them be the way they are. You just keep on with life. If you have to give up on dating apps, so be it. If you choose to try again, I urge you to see what more you can do, even if it seems fruitless. Have the mind of an entrepreneur. Good things can be a real pain in the butt to obtain sometimes. Whether you seek to mingle with someone in the virtual world or in the every-day bustle face to face.
This is life. It delivers scum sandwiches sometimes. It is not fair. But God, is still good. He sent His only Son to pardon you and me of our wretched sin. His gift of grace is relentless and His love is unfailing.
The trials of life are a result of man's sin in the Garden. It's our faults for disobeying God's solemn commands. And everyone is guilty. Seek Jesus. Seek Him in Prayer, and no matter how hard life is, don't blame Him. And don't someone else for something they didn't do. God's goodness abounds beyond the fall of Creation. He is above all. For who He is and the love that He pours out for mankind. Not in a way we may perceive as "loving" but His love covered a price we cannot cover with any effort on our part.
Sorry I ended up preaching. But let the Good News be known.
Don't blame Courtney for this though. I know it's hard. I am in the same boat. But press on. Life goes on. Just pray without ceasing, and despite the outcome, Jesus is Lord.
Avoid at all costs. There is way too much bait and switch going on in dating apps. Meet in the streets or at the grocery store. You'll get a better idea of the person, and you won't be wasting time
Word
Issue is, women have been pretty vocal in recent years that they don't want to be hit on by random guys when they're going about their business.
What do you mean by this
And doesn't how dating apps work
guy: *shows body*
girl: "Thats narcism"
girls: *shows body*
girls: "thats body positivity"
i hate double standards.
The world isnt fair
@The Darkest Night true. Get muscles and money. Smash the ones that wouldn’t give you a chance before
No just dont let them make the rules
Yeah, women that wanna be like men but dont like the drawbacks to it?
you're missing the point
I met my wife on plenty of fish dating app and now we are married, have a house and 15 month old baby boy
You're part of a lucky minority.
Marriage is like suicide for men
@@lifemocker85 The toxic ones, yes. Date wisely!
So why are you on this video? :D
@@antoniorizo335 because married dudes always think they can give good dating advice. They usually can’t 🤷♂️
Tip number 1. Do not get drunk and go on a dating app 😂
It seems you speak from experience 😂
Tip number 2, don't get on a dating app.
It doesnt matter for majority of men since women only chase the small top %
Double for Ambien
Great advice father
Best tip for dating apps is don't use them. It's a really shallow environment and the people on them have the personalities of goldfish and 9 times out of 10 they're on the app for a reason. Meeting women out in the real world will always be a better experience.
I don't know about that. So many women these days are "woke" and "liberal". If you even look at a woman wrong, you might find yourself at the center of a sexual harassment suit. You just can't trust them. I prefer "escorts".
I've come to realise that approaching girls online isn't for me. It feels so unnatural and awkward to try to present yourself and seem interesting to someone who you've never met before through text messages.
girls hate when you're a try hard and you literally can't not be a try hard when you're swiping and trying to prove your value with pictures and messages
Thats probably the mistake you are making. You try to present yourself so hard, it seems tryhard and needy
Girls like to be worshipped and the provider likes your money, what could go wrong?
It IS a callous world ☺️
For the First time in 21 years I am single and not a minute in to this video dying alone sounds more appealing.
I have been on dating apps and I have a few tips for women:
1. Please post pictures alone, I hate scrolling through 5 pics and trying to mentally figure out who is you
2. Post pictures of doing cool things like hiking, zip-lining etc
3. Don't post pics with your tongue out, that makes you look trashy
4. All you photos shouldn't be selifes in your bathroom, that is lame
5. Have a picture with your most of you body in it. If it looks like you're hiding your figure
6. When you do match with a guy, don't start asking probing questions on say things critical of him:
- I got a girl message me saying : _Why do you look unenthused in most of your pictures._
- I got another message with a girl acting surprised, and when I asked why: she assumed that I only dated Asian women, I didn't post anything saying a preferred Asian women and I had one picture with an Asian friend when I was in my Captain America Halloween costume.
This is just my experience. Oh and guys, dating apps give you many options so be picky on who you go out with.
Step 1: Be Attractive
Step 2: Don't be unattractive
The End
I'm attractive and even that don't work I'm always getting likes but I don't say nothing so entertaining that they don't ever reply back. Women think men now are their personal jesters we have to entertain them or we are out it's stupid.
3# Turn off for women, opening with "Hi", "Hey", or "Hello." Women's first words, "Hi", "Hey", and "Hello." I can post a dozen screen shots to back this up.
I changed my photo to a grizzly bear and had great success.
thats a good idea. I might set up an account for Jason Vorhees and see how he does compared to me. probably will get more matches
@@Runny117 definitely will get more swipes.
The ONLY thing REALLY missing in the conversation on dating apps is highlighing the different experiences of men and women.
There's ALREADY huge emphasis on the issues faced by women from arseholes, or the sheer volume of attention... but DAMNED few people even appreciate that "just try harder" sucks as an answer, even if it is correct.
When women CONSISTENTLY complain about the volume and quality of attention they get (and it is NOT just "tens." I know first hand VERY average women who are insecure as ALL hell also receive ENORMOUS volumes of attention. I honestly think it fuels women's insecurities, as they likely don't feel they deserve it & that it's somehow an expression of ulterior motive from men)
There's just very little appreciation and even less sympathy for the fact guys have to work hard to even be SEEN. And then there's some HUGE cultural pressure on men that any attention they DO receive should be reciprocated, or they're "entitled"
I know I'll sound judgemental, but I'll go through dating sites and see profile after profile of overweight single mothers with a laundry list of demands for a partner. Some of these women I even feel are worth talking to (there's nothing wrong with motherhood, some women carry weight well & I don't like to judge profiles on tone (maybe they have reasonable cause?)
From demanding men over 6 foot, to complaining about fuckbois (on their profile page) to saying "no gamers" or "my kids come first" (which always makes me question it. Who needs to SAY that? On a DATING site?)
I can not IMAGINE the reaction of women is men's profiles listed "no fat chicks" or similar, but it's TOTALLY normal the other way around because there will ALWAYS be enough male attention. (the nice women will at least make it a fun point. "I'm tall and I like to wear heels" is a common one, and to me that's fair. They're putting their preference on them, not projecting it onto guys)
word of advice, if you come into this attitude you'll never attract girls. realize life isn't fair and do the best you can.
@@Chris-de2qc
So, the attitude of "life isn't fair, but do the best you can" is an attitude that won't work, but people should follow your advice and do precisely that?
At no point do I suggest otherwise.
Is your advice that ADMITTING that life isn't fair and you should just do the best you can is a bad thing?
So, honesty is bad?
I won't do dating apps. Way too many women lie there and I've been around too many Newport Beach women who are pretending to be good girls to the guy they like while hooking up with several guys on the side because they can...
Tinder is known as a hookup app. A girl may say she's not there for that but hey, when everything in the candy store is free, maybe an occasional lollipop, nobody has to know, right!?
I've had my best success since I started hiking and climbing. The girls are fit, too busy for dating apps and enjoy the outdoors but that's not for everyone!
And I disagree, I think the dating apps aren't here to stay. I think people will mature, realize how this is all addicting and the pendulum will swing the other way.
I’m a male. I’m told I’m very good looking. I am. I barely get responses. Women seem to get dozens per day.
It’s confusing.
Why is it ok for girls to say “hi, hello, what’s up?” But boys aren’t? Why do we have to put all the effort in when it comes to texting? Why do we have to text them first?
Also, I get why why posting mirror selfies can be considered narcissistic but girls post bikini photos as first picture all the time but apparently that's justified haha.
@@sunnybossynarks double standards everywhere.
@deuteros why?
@@spotscorner6040why tho? Feminist
This is what is so hypocritical with women on OLD. It's the guy who has to do all the work in addition to being hot.
Be Chad or Tyrone, if not, get out out.
100% agree
Based
dating apps can destroy a mans confidence getting rejected 99% of the time you send a message and women just don't seem to give you a chance to show them how good for them you can be why I don't know but surely they should give more men the chance to prove themselves
Courtney, quick question: so i noticed some girls have their fb profile on their bios. if it's someone you really think you can click with, what do you think of straight up skipping waiting for a match, going straight to her fb, leaving a couple of comments on her pictures and see what goes from there? or just messaging her being straight up honest like: "hey saw your tinder bio, don't really like the app that much and decided to bypass it and leave a message here, should you wanna chat". something along those lines. what are your thoughts on this? in my mind it could show initiative and that you don't settle to "waiting in line" for a match to initiate a conversation
I think she'll think it's creepy
Advice from apps suggest staying on the app as long as possible because there are so many scammers that want personal info. I have only been doing dating apps a month or so. I don't respond to smiles or comments about my appearance.As a woman I look for someone who actually has read my profile and can engage with me in real conversation. If a car, cap, baby, fish , dead deer, or pet appears in the photos I know they are not for me. Also the mention of a beloved spouse in the profile that has died makes me think they are still deep in grief and not ready to move on. One guy I met wept in my car. Thanks for the video.
Some of those photo dos and don'ts should also apply to women on dating apps as well. Some women's profiles have mostly photos of the woman with a friend(s) (sometimes they have the same hair color and look like they go tanning together, I'm thinking "Why are you hiding from me?").
Sadly women doesnt have to make an effort at all. Its enough for them that theyre women so their inbox is full all the time
I'm 44 years old. My heart goes out to all the young guys trying to date in this modern shit show. I had success with women in my 20s. I was married for most of my 30s. At age 40, my wife cheated on me and I divorced her. I won't lie....it's been rough and very lonely. I feel lucky though, that I got to live out my young dating life before smart phones, dating apps, and social media. As hard as it was when I was young, when you were lonely, it sucked, but at least you didn't log into Facebook and Instagram and see a million pictures of all the girls that rejected you partying and hooking up with guys. At least every girl you saw on the train, bus, ferry, park bench, etc. didn't have her face in her phone and was more approachable. When you flirted with women in bars, you had a better chance because she didn't also have 15 other guys messaging her on a dating app. Re-entering the dating world over 40 has just been terrible....and I look young for my age.
You and I are alike. After being married to a narcissist for 10 years, we divorced, and I realized how much happier I am without that shit. Learn to make your own happiness as a single man, without relying on a woman.
Your sincerity makes men like me understand women better and have more confidence with ease. Thank you for being on point and sharing your experiences for all of us. Please never change who you are, Courtney. 🌹
this is the sweetest and realist comment on this video I've seen. I agree wholeheartedly. Her husband scored a gem.
@@EricWakefield-ls9ph Thanks, but I’d love to say that the woman who is to be with me must love God first and even without me. It is God who instituted the family and the one who can bless me with who He finds suitable for me according to His will, not mine. ♥️ 🕊️
@@kibawhitefang7176 AMEN! and He is so worthy! God is the ultimate founder of family like you said, and His Word is clear on the roles that husbands, wives, children, and siblings must obey. For our own good. I think you will find one likeminded, there are a lot of good hearted girls who love the Lord. It is hard to find but they are sure out there.
So since you made that comment 3 years ago, how have things changed for you since then? or what is different from then compared to now?
Seriously, how is your channel so underrated? You give a lot of sensible advice.
It’s bullshit man. 20 % of hot dude pull on dating app. These advice doesn’t work if you are not good looking. She is not giving the full picture...
Click on her profile her video thumbnails & titles are about all the same, she has no personality and her advise is constantly also the same explaining features about guys or women rather than focussing also on personality and romance. I'm unsubscribing, I've been on here for months. If she would laugh, smile big, and cut jokes here and there and not be soo like robotic I would be more interested. I'm not simping for her views anymore lol
@@learn1718thank tou facts someone told the truth
Women need to get away from the idea that they should sit there like perfect princesses waiting to be entertained by men who craft just the perfect message. True, there are many bad actors out there but women can be sadistic.
My online dating experience, here's something I wrote,
"Yeah, this online dating thing is strange. So far my experience is like this. When a woman likes me, she likes me, the talk is romantic, but the cart is going before the horse. Because the truth is, anyone I meet is a complete stranger who has romantic feelings, and so long as I don't talk about things I think are important with my life, things go fine. But as soon as the reality of who I am gets shared, things go bad. It seems the window of what's acceptable by women is more fantasy than anything, so I'm better off just not having an opinion on anything real. That seems to be the only way to obtain a relationship.
Mostly the women that like me, like that I'm a artist, who knows about spirituality. So they view me as some sort of spiritual artist architype,,, then they get to know me, and well I'm not an architype, I'm an individual, I have my own thoughts, and the fantasy is dispelled. Overall, it's nice to meet people, it's not fun sharing personal stuff with strangers so they can judge."
She blocked me after this. I guess I said something too true. Is it me, or do women just have the privilege to choose the man that does a song and dance, then later he gets called a liar, because the song and dance is a lie. But when a man is honest, she learns the lie is all she wants. Is this female toxicity? Or do just need to be a better person?
I've concluded that after being on these apps way longer than i had hoped over the course of my life, your messages don't matter AT ALL. The girls that I've actually struck up conversation and / or went on dates with either reached out first or matched with me just liking their photo with no message.
Hope these tips work as well for us average guys! Always room for improvement.
“Never just say hey to a women she will never like you”
Women who want to show interest in me “hi”
I haven’t been successful at Dating apps but what I have found is using context to wrangle up a conversation tend to go a long way, especially if she doesn’t see it coming.
Just seems dating apps are a woman's market.
Just like in reality then..
I personally don’t want to ever resort to a dating app. I just want to be out one day and find the most beautiful woman ever. I’m not saying dating apps are bad because congrats on meeting the love of your life on a dating app, but I personally just don’t want to use a dating app. As happy as I would to find out that a girl swiped right on me, I would still be sad because I had to resort to this.
Either IRL, or no one at all (for me anyway)
Any recommendations for someone who doesnt take pictures by themselves? Are you supposed to awkwardly crop them? Or can you post a bunch of pictures but with different people so it's obvious you are the one on the dating app? Great tips! Glad to see you're back!
nombredeusuario622 take some photos! I believe in you! 👏🏼
@@CourtneyRyan #noiphonegang #selfiesarelame #hateaskingotherpeopletotakemypicture #amiusingenoughhastags
nombredeusuario622 😂😂 haha then in your case yes I would just make sure it’s clear which one you are!
@@CourtneyRyan well now I want to draw big silly french pink mustaches on everyone except me because that would work too technically and because I cant take dating apps seriously
I hear success stories from net dating, but it is like (anecdotal) 1 person out of 100 that has met their dream match 💁♂️
I feel sometimes, it is marketed as something that men would like, but in reality it is intended for your suffering 💁♂️
Never taking dating advice from women.
ask men who date often
Male dating advice never helped me
Do you as a woman recommend that a man wears a pink shirt for a profile picture? I'm perfectly comfortable wearing pink, as I do so every Wednesday. Yes, it's because of Mean Girls. Would you advise against it or for it? Please give me your honest opinion. Thank you.
Hey Courtney as a man asking this would you recommend posting on the bio “not interested in hookups” if your attentions are in fact to build a genuine long term relationship?
Let’s pretend I was a high schooler who had a crush on a girl. What should I do? Definitely asking for a friend
You go up to her, and approach her...lol
Ask her out like I always do, understand that rejections are natural and move on if it happens
"don't send hi, hey, hello" ah, from what I've seen my attractive friends always send hi, hey hello, and guess what they get replies back, Courtney just end the bullsh*t, and get straight to the point, your advice doesn't work, if a guys attractive they can say whatever they want to a female and get replies, if their not attractive they can use your advice and get NOTHING, end this nonesence and just get straight to the point, stop selling guys hopes and dreams
Best dating app advice is don’t rely on dating apps if your a man. For the average man your gonna get like one match outta every 100 women. And the women you match with has 10 other options in her dms.
Thank you for this video, I struggle with dating apps!! I hope you have a good weekend 💛
Admir Barucija happy to help! You too! ☺️
Courtney Ryan thank you so much! ☺️
You know women could try being less picky, I really feel like there's a lot of expectations from people who preach not to expect things. And the female criticism is never ending... You do a really good job of telling us what is unattractive but I've never heard somebody I was dating say that I was attractive in any way.....
80/20. Women go to the top 20%
@@zengara11exactly
Keep any communication brief and far apart- at least a couple days… also, if a woman has a good body, there will be a full body picture in her photos- if there is not- there’s a reason- and it’s never a good reason.
Love your videos Courtney. But I disagree with the usage of dating apps for men. I’ve been told im very good looking and good physique with a good personality often (not blowing my own trumpet just being honest) but even then I get ghosted, ignored and cast aside so much on them. Which can be a huge knock on a man’s confidence and self esteem.
Whereas every time I’ve met someone in person they lasted much longer and were more meaningful. Not putting down anyone lucky enough to get into a good relationship from dating apps, but I would just recommend avoiding at all costs. You give very good tips but overall dating apps aren’t a great experience
One of the most dependable things I have learned is that what women say versus what they mean or want are nearly unrelated. Men are the opposite while also being the "pursuers". Learn to value what gets results, not their explanations. Of course some women have more self awareness but don't count on it haha.
Another thing is to study "sales "and apply the lessons there (if you are able to on your own make useful connections).
Great tips Courtney! Cant wait to try them out.
I have tried Tinder Once and it was a horrible experience. I didn't get a single match for 2 days and the matches I did get were of 2 profiles the first one I messaged said she had accidentally swiped right and the 2nd one turned out to Be a He.
Hey Courtney, could you do a whole series and deep-dive in dating apps?
😃😃😃
So if you say to her “I’m not on here much, can we exchange numbers” but she says “can we talk on here a little more” what’s the move then?
I mostly agree with your tips. But, maybe you should make one of these for women too. A lot of women will only have pics of themselves from the chest up and almost falling out of their shirt while their bio reads "no hook ups" or "where are all the real men". I have talked to several friends on dating apps and like myself they are lucky to get 1 match a month and no matter how much or little the first msg is to her contains 99% of the time she never responds. My friends and I are above average looking in our 40's, according to some of our female counterpart friends. But we are not the 'Alphas' 9's or 10's that most of these women are thinking they deserve. A lot of women are also very bad at having only group photos and photos with their children in them. I'm sorry but children do not belong in dating app photos, it's fine to say you have children and their ages. But keep them out or block them out with photo editing. I could go on but won't. Thanks for your insight.
Women dont rly need tips. There some some experiments where even borderline obese chicks get hundreds of likes
Thanks Courtney, I'm 25 and I'm on some dating apps and these tips were very helpful.
I think dating apps are a lot like going for or applying for a job or a job interview. You need to try and make a good impression and truefull version of yourself from the start
Yeah like this scene from the movie The Ugly Truth: ua-cam.com/video/hO-0FQ8UDbQ/v-deo.html
Talk about psycho. 😨😒
How about women that say "hey" "hi" "hello" etc when you have things on your profile that are interesting?
Here's my advice to men:
Do not use Tinder if you are unattractive or ugly.
yes go gym instead
W
What seemed to help me as a very average looking guy is having like 3 good pictures and then a very basic profil weirdly enough too much info seems to be a turn off
Been there my dude. Thanks for the reality check, gonna play it cool from now on.
First time on a dating app. What’s proper etiquette as far as messages go? Do you just not answer a message if your not interested?
Some are so far away, I’m not investing time and money to drive over an hour away!
Some of these women are really pretty and can pretty much pick and choose any man in a room! So it’s kind of a red flag to me, that they are single and on a dating app! Thoughts anyone?
Girl: Don't say "Hey"
Also Girl: hey how r u
I've never used a dating app but I can relate to some of the points you're making. But then again, I also understand why Chads are sending "hey" messages and use shirtless pics as profilepic when there's a 2:1 ratio of men on dating apps, they have to initiate conversation and still have a rejection rate far higher then the other way around. At some point Chads gonna be Chads writing to 100 girls a night and if just one of them hooks up with them it's mission accomplished for them. And that's if you're a good looking Chad. If you're avarage looking all you can do is hope and be humorous about the whole dating thing.
I'd rather not do any of this.
2:1? Lol it was shown to be more like 9:1 a woman will get about 20x the number of likes as a man within the same amount of time
2:1??? It is literally like 9:1 or so
I like your approach on dating which has insight in addition to genuine. Your dressing style is arguably exotic
And She's back!
Shahriar Islam Khan yes sir! 🤩
I’ve stayed true to myself, took those advices and it resulted in only two dates and several ghostings.
On the sore loser tip, I donnow, why do you care if you're an asshole, that person's a stranger you will likely never ever meet, you owe them no courtesy and gain nothing by giving courtesy. I've felt bad for turning down girls in the past, why shouldn't that be the case for everyone else.
Functionally speaking I don't care, if you don't like me and you give me a clown reason, I WILL treat you like a clown and make you feel bad. If I HAVE to deal with 100 rejections I'd rather make fun of 50 of them for my own sanity. Between me feeling bad out of an interraction or stranger I don't care about feeling bad, I choose the stranger, I don't care, I'm selfish like that, I will do anything to keep my mental health.
Thanks a lot for your thoughtful and honest tips. On a personal note : your voice is very pleasant and soothing. I also like the fact that your makep matches your haircolor :)
There is nothing in this video that all of us have not heard a million times already.
What do you do if you look much younger than you're then you are? Since everyone looks at age. I do not want to lie but I look much younger than I am.
Personally I am really ‘traditional’ about meeting people so I haven’t never gone into the dating app bandwagon. If i were to, I know safely that I have picked up a few great tips from you through this video. Thank you again :)
I've been to too many weddings where the bride and groom have met on tinder to know it's not a fluke and that online dating works, the tools at most men's disposal to catch anything other than *crap* just aren't available, even in the paid versions of these apps.
when you match, just say her name. with an exclamation mark. works nearly every time.
Then what haha, good idea though ;)
Let's be honest, most women aren't even going to bother to read your bio unless she sees your photo and wants to learn more. You can say the wittiest thing but it will go unnoticed if you don't pass the initial screentest.
Just be perfect. It’s so easy.
These are super helpful, thanks for breaking it down. Fingers crossed my matches go up ;)
How about dating apps for men over 40’s? What do you recommend?
Same thing dude, women never drop their unreachable standards at any age, maybe when they get older like 40, and are desperate maybe they will go for others, but just use the same old same old, be attractive and that's it
None. Zero. The world hates us men. Just go your own way.👊
Still not getting matches feel like I’m wasting my time being on dating apps
Good points but I think too many of us including content creators have wasted too much time and money finding out that dating apps are a scam for men.
Online Dating as of now requires as much time as a part-time job, with the difference of wasting money instead of earning any
It's not a job. It's an application and you are hoping to get an interview.
1. be attractive
2. don't be unattractive
just downloaded the app been off a while, thanks Courtney for kicking the stigma of dating apps!
Don't fall for it, dating apps are a waste of time for anybody under a 10.
@@metalmk6839 Unless you have very low standards bro, I can match but they weigh about 300 Ibs