As someone much closer to 70 than to 40, I was delighted and, honestly, surprised by your 10th save the best for last suggestion of a well-curated book collection. Building a library over a lifetime that speaks to the soul---books that inspire, that will make you laugh again, remind you of times and friends and relationships, of love and loss---this an indispensable gift to one's self. Well done.
An observation about that well-curated book collection. If you move often, it's an albatross around your neck. And.....alcohol... Alcohol is nobody's friend. I'm almost a year away from my last drink. I didn't have a drinking problem. (My father did.) I paid attention to the scientific findings. There is no safe amount of alcohol. It's all poison to your system. Even a little bit. You make a personal choice. Mine was to stop drinking and to chalk it all up to at least one more thing that is within my control, like exercise, to improve my quality of life. Do you still want to mingle with friends at a pub or bar? Then you only have to hold a glass of seltzer on ice with a lemon slice. Nobody notices or cares. You could be the designated driver and be a hero.
@@w.adammandelbaum1805 Ive come across a few videos on this channel and I have a theory why the channel is not bigger. older men 40 to 60 already have this kind of thing worked out already as altough presented well it really is not ground breaking content and younger men just arnt interesed yet.
What you need by 40 is; the ability to achieve post hedonist/materialist clarity. No one sees your car and decides to get sober and become a doctor. Buy what you like for yourself but not to impress others. If it brings you joy go for it.
Fully agree with your list Ash, 1 thing I would have added and to me is vitally important is having a good command of your finances, knowing the difference between assets and liabilities, having savings, investments, money management, pension, if you start early enough your older self will thank you, who wants to be in the position of having to rely on govt for winter fuel payments? Not me, I am the captain of my ship and I will rely on no one.
What a nice confirmation. You have ticked ALL my boxes of things I got myself over the years. Except for alcohol. Never was drunk my entire life. It is tough enough without being drunk. No use making it worse.
Ash this was a good video, i am 40 +23 years now. I still have the same charcoal suit and navy blue club blazer that i han when i was 40, when i was 40 i was and still am a well read man. When i was 40 i just had one watch a Casio G-Shock square, i wore that with a renyed tuxedo at my wedding, i wore that this summer when my wife and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversery. When i was 40 i worked as a welder on oilrig in the norwegian sea. I work as a excavator operator today. I have never ever been sitting in an office, but besides Swedish my native tongue i speak 4 languages.
One good thing to remember much of these items can be bought second hand on the likes of ebay. Top end items people have used once in some cases for very little money. Worth remembering if you're not earning a lot and might think these things are unattainable at retail price.
Two counter points. I am a medical imaging professional, X-ray and MRI. Some of my patients are cancer patients and are currently undergoing Chemotherapy. They are often borderline nauseous. Smells, food, colognes, aftershave...etc. can make them feel ill. I have been told so directly by them. I shower and use soap and water. So, perhaps, a quality soap with a mild scent. That's enough. And lastly, in regard to wearing an analog watch. When I work around an MRI system, I physically encounter powerful magnetic fringe fields that can ruin a mechanical analog watch. So, I wear a nice, understated digital watch, on the job. I own analogs and wear them often while off duty.
My man Ash! Never disappoints! I’m a 62 year old retired (20 years in the army)soldier and now “old age” Social Security pension recipient! Every point you made here for men age 40 was spot on correct!! 👍
Excellent video. I am currently 62. When I look back to when I turned 40, which of these had I achieved…? Suit. No. I had a sports jacket that I wore with trousers, shirt and tie when required. I didn’t buy my first real suit until my mid-50s and in hindsight it was wrong. Black and not well fitted. Dress shoes. No. I had a cheap, ugly pair of shoes that I wore with the above outfit. Decent luggage. No. At that time I was in a job that required me to travel a lot. I had a suitcase that was OK, but I would not describe it as high quality. Shaving kit. Sort of. I travelled a lot and had a completely separate toiletry kit for travelling separate from my home gear. Fragrance. Mmm, maybe. I think at that time I had a cologne that I used regularly. Wristwatch. I don’t think so. I bought myself a good watch, but I think it was later than age 40. I still have it and enjoy wearing it. Accessories. Yes and no. I had a few ties but nothing special. Pocket square… no. I didn’t have one at that time. Wallet… sure. Alcohol control. Yes. I enjoy drinking but I think by 40 I had it under control. Self-development plan. No. Have never really done this. Reading. Yes. I have always done a lot of reading of all kinds. I have a good library of books I enjoy and am proud to display. I have read much more in books borrowed from the library. Edit: I should point out that I have all of these items (except the high quality luggage and shaving kit) and attributes now, largely as a result of a conscious effort to dress better and watching UA-cam channels like this one.
Hi Ash! This is a fantastically put-through video with excellent (and not to mention realistic) recommendations! I am delighted that almost the lot is thoroughly non-negotiable for me to achieve near sooner. Your immaculate deliverance and voluminous vocabulary over-stress the priority to conceptualise the final few skills to master! I believe adding time stamps would be immensely beneficial for ordered, suggestive videos as such to effectively jump across and back to sections of interest. I have provisionally listed the one that follows (whilst not wishing to divulge any excitement), which I hope shall be helpful to others. 1:43 - A Decent Suit of Clothes 3:10 - Dress Shoes or Boots 5:23 - Decent Luggage 6:53 - A Good Shaving Kit 9:07 - A Signature Scent 10:50 - A Good Analogue Wristwatch 12:25 - Good Accessories in the Wardrobe 14:34 - A Good Command of Alcohol 16:26 - A Self-development Plan 18:13 - A Good Personal Library of Books I wouldn't happen to mind if this is to be borrowed into the video description. ; ) Best wishes, Gents!
An interesting video. I’d say that apart from good pairs of boots and shoes, a decent, ideally mechanical, watch, one or two high quality suits, and a selection of ties and cufflinks. However, the most valuable things a man can acquire by the age of 40 are politeness, wisdom, humility, kindness and a desire to nurture and mentor others. More valuable things that age can bring you than material things.
Some of these should be done in your 20s. Start saving for your retirement as soon as possible. Had then all by my 40s. In my middle 60s now and reaping the benefits. Great advice Ash. Best regards Ron
Having unbelievably reached the age of 60, despite surpassing 5 years after a type of stroke that kills 80% of survivors within 5 years, I have a unique perspective on what is important to myself, and that includes, aside from books, a video library and music collection, as well as toys, like my model railroad collection! Especially my toy fascination never ends to surprise with the insights I gather about the history and politics that produced the prototypes of the models I own, and how these trains were shaped and how they moved and what they moved throughout the world, in peace and wars! Of course, I realised 20 years ago, that my eyes were not what they use to be, and I could not concentrate on reading anymore like I used to as a kid and youth. However, a large television, fed with good material from a well selected library, turned out to be quite enjoyable and very valuable and esoteric to me. I also so completely agree on good shoes being a necessity, and I absolutely loath sneakers, and find them atrociously uncomfortable! They give me a severe backache, and I avoid them at all costs, instead wearing non-cushioned hard-sole shoes, that carry me anywhere! One thing of course you do not mention, as once again, you still sit in a forest park without a home, is a home! These days, so many of us naturally find a home, even a rented one, nearly impossible to afford, but it should be on the list, as a goal to reach for! As mentioned before, I am still rooting for you on your journey to finally have at least a small hut (well camouflaged to avoid paying any greedy landlord any sort of land-lease) with a hibachi grill outside, and an enclosed toilet and shower to call your own! Tally Ho, and the best of luck to finally get out of that park and move into a small enclosure to stay out of the weather!
Double-edged razors are not only far more cost effective but are also much better for the environment. Luggage can be tricky albeit a weekend bag is definitely worth the investment. Luggage for air flights gets thrown about or squashed into overhead cabinets so I’m less convinced spending too much for this unless you are travelling by private jet (which I don’t). Thanks for posting Ash.
Nice list Ash. You briefly mentioned finances in your "Personal Development Plan" point. However, if I think back, maybe the thing I wish someone had stressed the importance of to me when I was 40 would have been to prioritise financial planning and have direct management of your pension pot. As it turned out I'm OK - but i could have been "very OK" if I'd taken financial advice and managed my pensions better when I was 40. So my advice to all 40 year olds with good jobs and a decent pension pot is to engage with a (reputable) professional financial advisor and be in charge of your pensions rather than just letting them sit there and you having no oversight. Believe me, this advice could change a 40 year old man's life! And even help facilitate early retirement.
This is a wonderful list of essential items, or concepts, that a man must acquire by the age of forty, Ash. And I especially appreciate your inclusion of a personal library. (As Prospero said in The Tempest, "My library was dukedom large enough.") One other item I might add, if we're raising the bar as far as a personal library, would be a knowledge and appreciation of a variety of forms of music, including classical music and jazz. I know full well that this is a pipedream, and I will instantly be accused of snobbery, but I maintain that a civilized man is a man who is acquainted with the great artistic achievements of western civilization, and that includes operas, symphonies, concertos, sonatas, ballets, etc.
Great video. How about " 10 things you should do, and have in your life to keep you young at 60?". Going to pop concerts, Japanese denim and still collecting sneakers does it for me.
Ash, another great video and I appreciate your advice. As a 30-something, you are one of the few men in my life who are a good example for me. Cheers all
Great advise Ash. For me coming of age was 42 ( The age that Elvis died) I think owning the complete set of Graham Greene novels. Such a fantastic author who’s had me on the edge of my seat whilst reading. Even though his stories were set many decades ago the message is always relevant for today’s life.
Just turned 40 in April, love my custom Double Breasted Suits, knit polos, turtle necks and odd trousers. People see me in my day to day and think I look like Tony Soprano lol
Greetings from Western Canada 🇨🇦 Navy suit, dress shoes/boot, razor, astringent, and signature scent, watch (automatic of course), basic ties, open head to learn from your lessons, self development, books. YES! At 46, I am going down your list and agreeing with every item. I agree with your list and I am a fan of this video., Ash. Thank you for posting.
Closer to my 50th than I am my 40th now, but absolutely agree with your thoughts and recommendations Ash. Still working on a couple of these myself, but I will get there. Thanks for the conversation!
Concur with everything on this list. Glad I've got it all covered lol! I do have about a dozen neckties of various colors, but haven't worn one in 10 years bc i made the transition to self-tie bowties and have over 50 for all seasons and occasions. For alcohol: I'm a licensed mixologist and concur it's an enjoyable toxin, so be regulated. A gent doesn't lose self-control in social situations. I totally suck at the finances, though. Can't have it all! My library is principally classic Christian Spirituality with heavy focus on monasticism.
90% agree Ash it's just the shaving thats a bit contentious for me . I can't seem to get on with double edged razors I'm afraid although many people I know use them . Another great vlog Sir thank you for sharing your wisdom with all of us👍
I own 2 suits, 1 gray, 1 black. 2 Paris of dress shoes, black & brown. Worn a suit only once, at a Wedding, back in 2018. I was 30 y.o. I shave 3 times a week and I use a hair regenerator. It works better than a shaving gel or foam, and only a face cream after shaving. But I have a bottle of old spice aftershave, just because I love the smell of it. I do use a parfume everyday, since the age of 30, and Everybody at works knows I’m somewhere in the room based just on my scent. I own a watch collection, from a classic automatic dress watch, to an Apple watch. I try to wear them as much as I can. The Apple watch mostly for working out. Now I’m mostly looking for what books to read/buy, so a book collection will be built over time. Sorry for the long comment, but I enjoy these kinds of videos.
Nice to see you keeping at the spit & polish, Ash. I've duplicated my dress shoes with a couple of pairs with rubber soles. Why? For when it's raining hard. Good video.
Im nearly 40 and only now reading Bram Stoker's Dracula. Im reading it to the children as a bed time story but really its for me. It's a shame that I am only reading classics like this at my age, I should have been acquainted with them as a teenager but alas 'plant a tree today and all that'. I already have a library of books, but I always bought vacuous self-help and business books to get some business and career edge. The only groundbreaking books on the shelves were Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill and Robert Kiosaki's Rich Dad Poor Dad. I am no longer so interested in capitalism, I am now interested in a well-furnished mind. Next on my reading list is Ian Flemings collection.
Great video. I haven't turn 40 yet but it isn't that far anymore. Some of the things mentioned I've achieved at my 20s - some only few years ago. The only thing I would add to my personal list may seem contradictory to "Having a plan" but it isn't. "Be open minded and recognise opportunities and seize them." Planning too much and in too much detail can hold you back from achieving your goals if you are focusing to much on details instead of looking at the big picture. Sometimes opportunities arise which will lead you in the right direction even if they are not part of your plan. At least in my experience.
I am 29 years old this year and will enter my 30s from next year. I think I have 4 things that you listed. A good fragrance (L’occtaine), a good accessory (Coach leather wallet), a good command on alcohol (I have low tolerance for alcohol so I don’t drink much), and a good watch (modern Blancpain Fifty Fathoms). Gotta invest in the remaining. Thank you for your wisdom Ash😊
Ash, your advocacy for reading and goal setting with respect to learning led me to attempt to read two books per month this year. I’m still on track and have enjoyed vastly more books on a wider array of subjects than I’ve read previously. I have just finished “Anxious Generation” by Jonathan Haidt and moved swiftly on to “The Secret Hours” by Mick Herron. Thank you for your own book suggestions as I’ve read many of them this year, and I’d love a video on your own library and favorite books therein. Best wishes! PS. As someone who never knew how to journal, I found your life audit video a very powerful concept and this is the reason I set this goal for myself this year.
That is excellent news sir - the man who reads, is the man who leads! The journal swiftly becomes your confidential friend and also your accountability buddy, and all for the price of a book and pen! Best investment ever!
I’m 39 watching this and I’m glad that I have nearly everything you’ve mentioned. What’s the wallet you showed? I have a nice mini leather wallet, but I liked yours very much.
I have used the combination of a blazer and matching trousers as an alternative to a suit for formal occasions for a long time now, I believe it has made me stand out as a bit more stylish than the average, it has got me complements at any rate. I would also say the possession of a kilt if you have even the slightest of Scottish ancestry is a must too. I have the full rig complete with Inverness cape. Ironically as I shave less I have invested in better kit for shaving that last bit of my chin to give me the right style. My watch is a Seiko Kinetic diver with a Nato strap, it is not a dress watch it is showing some "distress" but I think that says something about me too. Anyway 40 was a long time ago, I am getting closer to the big seven O now.
Kids here in the Netherlands are not allowed to have a cellphone in class anymore. Now it turned out that a lot of them have trouble reading the analog clocks at school.
Ash, another good video, My epiphany year was 30. It was the year that I stopped and reflected where I was and where I was going. I do reflect again and again but 30 was the big one for me. As for your last suggestion I have to agree with J.K. Rollins and yourself find a subject you like to get the reading bug started and then you should expand to all types of subjects. You did a really nice summary and reflection this time.
I'm 70 and am pleased to say I have all of those you mention. Regarding the self development plan: I had one at eighteen when i was on my railway apprenticeship. I thought I'd never be like the old steam loco filters with dodgy knees and aching backs, I was going to set the world alight......fast forward fifty two years, and here I am: suffering dodgy knee and an aching back. Oh and as for setting the world alight: that turned out to be a damp squib. Mind you 70 is the new 30, in my mind anyway, so there's hope for me yet.
Excellent content, Ash. The number of views this video is receiving is testimony to the validity of your list. To echo another comment here, I would add a good knowledge of finance / financial planning and budgeting as one of my essentials by the age of 40. Just curious, what is the book on your desk in this video?
Covey ‘7 habits of highly effective leaders’ as a classic self development book. It’s not business orientated, and it provides a compass rather than a map. A compass can be used anywhere to find your true north, a map is only useful in a specific situation. Good list, having just turned 50, have come to this point, perhaps 5 or so years late. I wonder how many under 40s can appreciate this wisdom.
Again, agreed on each and every point. I fell in love with my Turgoen T16 Pilot watch. I own several watches, including my grail, the Omega Moonwatch. But when I wanted to celebrate a milestone in revenue for my own company, I came across the T16, learning that the Spitfire engineer created it. I fell in love with it and would say that it is my most beautiful piece. It is about what I like. Funny side note: Churchill is one of my heroes and I say that the Spitfire was the best plane of WWII. I am from Germany. 😂.
As someone interested in the Victorian style, I'd like to start using a pocket watch again (I once bought a novelty one at a Goth Weekend). But a wristwatch would be handy when dressing "casually" for getting me to look at my phone less.
Great video as always Ash. While I agree with the items on your list, I have to defend the Apple Watch. Paired with a leather strap or steel bracelet, it can be blended into a gentlemen’s wardrobe. In the spirit of “that which is measured is improved” a gent can track exercise, sleep, hydration and more with a smart watch. It also proves to be a valuable efficiency tool in the workplace. A gent can quickly check with a glance if it’s his child’s school reaching out with an emergency or the boss giving the go ahead to discuss an item in a meeting. While it’s equally rude to scroll a watch in a meeting as a phone. The Apple Watch affords a bit more stealth. While I agree with the positive statement a classy mechanical watch makes, as an older gent in the workplace the latest Apple Watch also makes a positive statement. It says that despite the receding white hair, I’m current with tech. Like everything else in life it is all a trade off. Thanks for the great content.
I'm sure you remember them: shirts with cuffs that can be either worn with cuff links, or be closed with a normal button. My father wore them all the time in the 1960s. You don't need french cuffs. And most of today's shirts can be easily altered. All you need is a second buttonhole.
I like one more thing - things and tools you are using regularly, on a daily basis must be best possible for what you can afford. Quality stuff. F.i. expensive stuff, even the best in the world, if you use it once a year is not so interesting at the end. Sell it and give more for the things you actually need and use every day. And simplify - one thing, but the best.
I can add a small thing to the list, a good pen, it can be a fountain pen or not. I like the fact that you added self development and the library, most of lists like this one, have no such things.
Lovely classic square faced gold dress watch not the garish diamond studded rolex. Hand made shoes and long tweed coat.leather luggage. Never drink .carry one's self with respect and dignity. Never show off.
Hahahaha. I remember my other bought me a canvas duffle at a surplus store. I carried that everywhere with me - the gym, college, police college and then on my travels around the world. I stopped when my boss, a retired senior officer saw this and said "get away from uniform" which meant I was no longer a rough and ready peeler but a refined traveling gentleman. The watch section is 100%. The attempts by people to metricise every aspect of their lives is utterly bizzare.
Very nice suggestions, thank you. The last one is high level indeed. Well done. P.s.: almost there, as I just need a leather case for my travels. Already have one for my job. 😊
Things to own by 40: 1. A robust fitness, hygiene and grooming regime 2. Healthy eating habits/ alcohol refrainment 3. Good manners/ chivalry 4. Bad women 5. Goodyear welted footwear 6. Clothes that fit properly 7. A dress, field and sports watch 8. Lots of books 9. Hobbies 10. Fragrances
I’ve been an avid reader my entire life - could probably fill a house floor to ceiling with books I’ve read. I don’t, however, feel compelled to purchase and display them. Seems a waste of money and real estate, and in my climate a habitat for vermin. I’m perfectly happy supporting my local library.
Bravo Ash, another great post. You missed something you have in spades - a terrific vocabulary. Too many people recite bumper sticker cliches instead of fresh sentences.
loved this video and a lot of good advice. Just just a quickie, is it acceptable to wear a dark grey suit and black brogues to a funeral instead of black Oxfords?
I am a fifth generation carpenter, my wife was attracted to me because I always smelled like fresh cut pine. Great video, it’s sad to see the demise of a smart dressed man.
I favour the Gillette Nacet blade, but every blade has its own characteristics and you will, in time, find a brand that suits you the best. Check out Ebay, as it is possible to buy mixed bags of DE blades of many types to allow you to try them out without buying a large amount of any one kind.
I am not really that into cars to be truthful. I have owned the same car for 8-years, and my last steel steed was with me for 11-years (both VW Golfs).
Another thing a man needs at 40 is a list of 10 things a man needs at 40. With respect to your comment on alcohol, I'll drink to that. As far as watches, I wear them on my feet so I never run out of time. I use perfumed ink for my signature scent. As far as a suit, I'm usually the defendant.
Books!!!!……no one reads books! Yes, books. A library of good books is the best life companion you can have and if you read good quality books you will never feel you have wasted your life on transient things.
I don't carry a smart phone and use a watch. Ash, some of the younger folks cannot use an analog watch - they cannot tell time using analog. Great video. AA for alcohol problems? You can die from alcohol. Liver failure, pancreas failure or brain damage. Every room in our house has bookshelves that are packed. We are voracious readers, and have been from a young age. That has led to our being well educated. I have a BA and an MA. My wife has has a doctorate and two Master's Degrees. And certificates for us both.
As someone much closer to 70 than to 40, I was delighted and, honestly, surprised by your 10th save the best for last suggestion of a well-curated book collection. Building a library over a lifetime that speaks to the soul---books that inspire, that will make you laugh again, remind you of times and friends and relationships, of love and loss---this an indispensable gift to one's self. Well done.
An observation about that well-curated book collection. If you move often, it's an albatross around your neck.
And.....alcohol...
Alcohol is nobody's friend. I'm almost a year away from my last drink. I didn't have a drinking problem. (My father did.) I paid attention to the scientific findings. There is no safe amount of alcohol. It's all poison to your system. Even a little bit. You make a personal choice. Mine was to stop drinking and to chalk it all up to at least one more thing that is within my control, like exercise, to improve my quality of life.
Do you still want to mingle with friends at a pub or bar? Then you only have to hold a glass of seltzer on ice with a lemon slice. Nobody notices or cares. You could be the designated driver and be a hero.
Missed a perfect opportunity to say “the gentleman that reads is the gentleman that succeeds” 😊
The person who reads is the person who leads.
Ash, you got to re-record 😂 I was like: He is gonna say it! And then he didn’t
I'm stealing this 😄👌🏼
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🙏🏼🫶🏼
I thought that exact phrase. I salute you Sir!
I just cannot understand how he doesn't have millions of subs by now. Hats off to you, Sir Ash !! You are phenomenal !!
Thank you so much 😀
Mr. Jones addresses intelligent motivated gentlemen, of which there are not millions. Ergo, the lower statistics.
@@w.adammandelbaum1805Agree 100% Sir.
@@w.adammandelbaum1805 Ive come across a few videos on this channel and I have a theory why the channel is not bigger. older men 40 to 60 already have this kind of thing worked out already as altough presented well it really is not ground breaking content and younger men just arnt interesed yet.
What you need by 40 is; the ability to achieve post hedonist/materialist clarity. No one sees your car and decides to get sober and become a doctor. Buy what you like for yourself but not to impress others. If it brings you joy go for it.
But what if impressing others is what you like? 😅
I just got the watch now I need the luggage.
I am 45.
Thanks for the tips.
Fully agree with your list Ash, 1 thing I would have added and to me is vitally important is having a good command of your finances, knowing the difference between assets and liabilities, having savings, investments, money management, pension, if you start early enough your older self will thank you, who wants to be in the position of having to rely on govt for winter fuel payments? Not me, I am the captain of my ship and I will rely on no one.
In that same vein, I may have started off with #1 as having or on ones way to having a MANS jobor career.
Here, here. Wealth is freedom, debt is slavery.
What a nice confirmation. You have ticked ALL my boxes of things I got myself over the years. Except for alcohol. Never was drunk my entire life. It is tough enough without being drunk. No use making it worse.
Ash this was a good video, i am 40 +23 years now. I still have the same charcoal suit and navy blue club blazer that i han when i was 40, when i was 40 i was and still am a well read man. When i was 40 i just had one watch a Casio G-Shock square, i wore that with a renyed tuxedo at my wedding, i wore that this summer when my wife and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversery. When i was 40 i worked as a welder on oilrig in the norwegian sea. I work as a excavator operator today. I have never ever been sitting in an office, but besides Swedish my native tongue i speak 4 languages.
One good thing to remember much of these items can be bought second hand on the likes of ebay. Top end items people have used once in some cases for very little money. Worth remembering if you're not earning a lot and might think these things are unattainable at retail price.
Great tip!
Two counter points.
I am a medical imaging professional, X-ray and MRI. Some of my patients are cancer patients and are currently undergoing Chemotherapy. They are often borderline nauseous. Smells, food, colognes, aftershave...etc. can make them feel ill. I have been told so directly by them. I shower and use soap and water. So, perhaps, a quality soap with a mild scent. That's enough. And lastly, in regard to wearing an analog watch. When I work around an MRI system, I physically encounter powerful magnetic fringe fields that can ruin a mechanical analog watch. So, I wear a nice, understated digital watch, on the job. I own analogs and wear them often while off duty.
My man Ash! Never disappoints! I’m a 62 year old retired (20 years in the army)soldier and now “old age” Social Security pension recipient! Every point you made here for men age 40 was spot on correct!! 👍
Excellent video.
I am currently 62. When I look back to when I turned 40, which of these had I achieved…?
Suit. No. I had a sports jacket that I wore with trousers, shirt and tie when required. I didn’t buy my first real suit until my mid-50s and in hindsight it was wrong. Black and not well fitted.
Dress shoes. No. I had a cheap, ugly pair of shoes that I wore with the above outfit.
Decent luggage. No. At that time I was in a job that required me to travel a lot. I had a suitcase that was OK, but I would not describe it as high quality.
Shaving kit. Sort of. I travelled a lot and had a completely separate toiletry kit for travelling separate from my home gear.
Fragrance. Mmm, maybe. I think at that time I had a cologne that I used regularly.
Wristwatch. I don’t think so. I bought myself a good watch, but I think it was later than age 40. I still have it and enjoy wearing it.
Accessories. Yes and no. I had a few ties but nothing special. Pocket square… no. I didn’t have one at that time. Wallet… sure.
Alcohol control. Yes. I enjoy drinking but I think by 40 I had it under control.
Self-development plan. No. Have never really done this.
Reading. Yes. I have always done a lot of reading of all kinds. I have a good library of books I enjoy and am proud to display. I have read much more in books borrowed from the library.
Edit: I should point out that I have all of these items (except the high quality luggage and shaving kit) and attributes now, largely as a result of a conscious effort to dress better and watching UA-cam channels like this one.
"A book can, and often will, change the life of a reader." How right you are, Ash! And I like the way you saved the best till last
Hi Ash! This is a fantastically put-through video with excellent (and not to mention realistic) recommendations! I am delighted that almost the lot is thoroughly non-negotiable for me to achieve near sooner. Your immaculate deliverance and voluminous vocabulary over-stress the priority to conceptualise the final few skills to master!
I believe adding time stamps would be immensely beneficial for ordered, suggestive videos as such to effectively jump across and back to sections of interest. I have provisionally listed the one that follows (whilst not wishing to divulge any excitement), which I hope shall be helpful to others.
1:43 - A Decent Suit of Clothes
3:10 - Dress Shoes or Boots
5:23 - Decent Luggage
6:53 - A Good Shaving Kit
9:07 - A Signature Scent
10:50 - A Good Analogue Wristwatch
12:25 - Good Accessories in the Wardrobe
14:34 - A Good Command of Alcohol
16:26 - A Self-development Plan
18:13 - A Good Personal Library of Books
I wouldn't happen to mind if this is to be borrowed into the video description. ; )
Best wishes, Gents!
You are most kind sir. Much appreciated.
@@TheChapsGuideAh! Aren't you gracious with words? : ) You’re truly inspiriting!
An interesting video. I’d say that apart from good pairs of boots and shoes, a decent, ideally mechanical, watch, one or two high quality suits, and a selection of ties and cufflinks. However, the most valuable things a man can acquire by the age of 40 are politeness, wisdom, humility, kindness and a desire to nurture and mentor others. More valuable things that age can bring you than material things.
Some of these should be done in your 20s. Start saving for your retirement as soon as possible. Had then all by my 40s. In my middle 60s now and reaping the benefits. Great advice Ash. Best regards Ron
Great video! I turned 40 last month. I think the military has taught me a lot of these lessons over the years thankfully. Glad to still be here. 😊
I completely agree with 100% of these points. Especially the alcohol part
I'm 54 and I couldn't agree more, specially with the last two points. Thank you very much!
Having unbelievably reached the age of 60, despite surpassing 5 years after a type of stroke that kills 80% of survivors within 5 years, I have a unique perspective on what is important to myself, and that includes, aside from books, a video library and music collection, as well as toys, like my model railroad collection! Especially my toy fascination never ends to surprise with the insights I gather about the history and politics that produced the prototypes of the models I own, and how these trains were shaped and how they moved and what they moved throughout the world, in peace and wars!
Of course, I realised 20 years ago, that my eyes were not what they use to be, and I could not concentrate on reading anymore like I used to as a kid and youth. However, a large television, fed with good material from a well selected library, turned out to be quite enjoyable and very valuable and esoteric to me.
I also so completely agree on good shoes being a necessity, and I absolutely loath sneakers, and find them atrociously uncomfortable! They give me a severe backache, and I avoid them at all costs, instead wearing non-cushioned hard-sole shoes, that carry me anywhere!
One thing of course you do not mention, as once again, you still sit in a forest park without a home, is a home! These days, so many of us naturally find a home, even a rented one, nearly impossible to afford, but it should be on the list, as a goal to reach for!
As mentioned before, I am still rooting for you on your journey to finally have at least a small hut (well camouflaged to avoid paying any greedy landlord any sort of land-lease) with a hibachi grill outside, and an enclosed toilet and shower to call your own!
Tally Ho, and the best of luck to finally get out of that park and move into a small enclosure to stay out of the weather!
Double-edged razors are not only far more cost effective but are also much better for the environment. Luggage can be tricky albeit a weekend bag is definitely worth the investment. Luggage for air flights gets thrown about or squashed into overhead cabinets so I’m less convinced spending too much for this unless you are travelling by private jet (which I don’t). Thanks for posting Ash.
Outstanding video and thank you for the wisdom.
Nice list Ash. You briefly mentioned finances in your "Personal Development Plan" point. However, if I think back, maybe the thing I wish someone had stressed the importance of to me when I was 40 would have been to prioritise financial planning and have direct management of your pension pot. As it turned out I'm OK - but i could have been "very OK" if I'd taken financial advice and managed my pensions better when I was 40. So my advice to all 40 year olds with good jobs and a decent pension pot is to engage with a (reputable) professional financial advisor and be in charge of your pensions rather than just letting them sit there and you having no oversight. Believe me, this advice could change a 40 year old man's life! And even help facilitate early retirement.
This is a wonderful list of essential items, or concepts, that a man must acquire by the age of forty, Ash.
And I especially appreciate your inclusion of a personal library. (As Prospero said in The Tempest, "My library was dukedom large enough.")
One other item I might add, if we're raising the bar as far as a personal library, would be a knowledge and appreciation of a variety of forms of music, including classical music and jazz.
I know full well that this is a pipedream, and I will instantly be accused of snobbery, but I maintain that a civilized man is a man who is acquainted with the great artistic achievements of western civilization, and that includes operas, symphonies, concertos, sonatas, ballets, etc.
Not at all snobbery, wisdom.
I’m well past 40 but your advice is if of value
Thank you Sir
Excellent video Ash. As a man who will turn 40 next year, there are a few things on this list I've got to tend to!
Great video. How about " 10 things you should do, and have in your life to keep you young at 60?". Going to pop concerts, Japanese denim and still collecting sneakers does it for me.
Ash, another great video and I appreciate your advice. As a 30-something, you are one of the few men in my life who are a good example for me. Cheers all
A masterful timepiece is a must by 35 years in my opinion
Great advise Ash. For me coming of age was 42 ( The age that Elvis died)
I think owning the complete set of Graham Greene novels. Such a fantastic author who’s had me on the edge of my seat whilst reading. Even though his stories were set many decades ago the message is always relevant for today’s life.
Loved your advice my good man. I have applied all of them in my life and I'm now 66years young ole chap.
Just turned 40 in April, love my custom Double Breasted Suits, knit polos, turtle necks and odd trousers. People see me in my day to day and think I look like Tony Soprano lol
Luv it! 👍🏽! Be great to leave details of the shoes, examples in the description below….
Greetings from Western Canada 🇨🇦
Navy suit, dress shoes/boot, razor, astringent, and signature scent, watch (automatic of course), basic ties, open head to learn from your lessons, self development, books. YES!
At 46, I am going down your list and agreeing with every item. I agree with your list and I am a fan of this video., Ash. Thank you for posting.
Closer to my 50th than I am my 40th now, but absolutely agree with your thoughts and recommendations Ash. Still working on a couple of these myself, but I will get there. Thanks for the conversation!
Great video sir, thanks! I'm glad to know that I've achieved many of the items on your list by 41. Cheers!
Concur with everything on this list. Glad I've got it all covered lol! I do have about a dozen neckties of various colors, but haven't worn one in 10 years bc i made the transition to self-tie bowties and have over 50 for all seasons and occasions. For alcohol: I'm a licensed mixologist and concur it's an enjoyable toxin, so be regulated. A gent doesn't lose self-control in social situations. I totally suck at the finances, though. Can't have it all! My library is principally classic Christian Spirituality with heavy focus on monasticism.
90% agree Ash it's just the shaving thats a bit contentious for me . I can't seem to get on with double edged razors I'm afraid although many people I know use them . Another great vlog Sir thank you for sharing your wisdom with all of us👍
Great top 10 Ash and oh, my number 10. I cannot recommend highly enough read, read and then please, read some more.
For years I dragged a large holdall around airports until I bought a case with wheels and my travel life got a lot easier!
time to take time to consider ethics too. Where the products are made and investing in Made in UK quality and craftsmanship
I own 2 suits, 1 gray, 1 black. 2 Paris of dress shoes, black & brown. Worn a suit only once, at a Wedding, back in 2018. I was 30 y.o. I shave 3 times a week and I use a hair regenerator. It works better than a shaving gel or foam, and only a face cream after shaving. But I have a bottle of old spice aftershave, just because I love the smell of it. I do use a parfume everyday, since the age of 30, and Everybody at works knows I’m somewhere in the room based just on my scent. I own a watch collection, from a classic automatic dress watch, to an Apple watch. I try to wear them as much as I can. The Apple watch mostly for working out. Now I’m mostly looking for what books to read/buy, so a book collection will be built over time. Sorry for the long comment, but I enjoy these kinds of videos.
Nice jacket and shirt tie combo
Ash, absolutely bonkers how on point last item is. Thank you for what you do, really enjoy yr videos.
Nice to see you keeping at the spit & polish, Ash.
I've duplicated my dress shoes with a couple of pairs with rubber soles. Why? For when it's raining hard.
Good video.
Same here. In fact, I exclusively buy Dainite soles these days
Im nearly 40 and only now reading Bram Stoker's Dracula. Im reading it to the children as a bed time story but really its for me. It's a shame that I am only reading classics like this at my age, I should have been acquainted with them as a teenager but alas 'plant a tree today and all that'.
I already have a library of books, but I always bought vacuous self-help and business books to get some business and career edge. The only groundbreaking books on the shelves were Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill and Robert Kiosaki's Rich Dad Poor Dad. I am no longer so interested in capitalism, I am now interested in a well-furnished mind. Next on my reading list is Ian Flemings collection.
Reading them Dracula as a bedtime story? They'll start sleeping during the day and boy will the dentist be surprised.
@@w.adammandelbaum1805 We haven't really got to the scary part yet
Great video. I haven't turn 40 yet but it isn't that far anymore. Some of the things mentioned I've achieved at my 20s - some only few years ago. The only thing I would add to my personal list may seem contradictory to "Having a plan" but it isn't. "Be open minded and recognise opportunities and seize them."
Planning too much and in too much detail can hold you back from achieving your goals if you are focusing to much on details instead of looking at the big picture. Sometimes opportunities arise which will lead you in the right direction even if they are not part of your plan. At least in my experience.
I am 29 years old this year and will enter my 30s from next year. I think I have 4 things that you listed. A good fragrance (L’occtaine), a good accessory (Coach leather wallet), a good command on alcohol (I have low tolerance for alcohol so I don’t drink much), and a good watch (modern Blancpain Fifty Fathoms). Gotta invest in the remaining. Thank you for your wisdom Ash😊
Ash, your advocacy for reading and goal setting with respect to learning led me to attempt to read two books per month this year. I’m still on track and have enjoyed vastly more books on a wider array of subjects than I’ve read previously. I have just finished “Anxious Generation” by Jonathan Haidt and moved swiftly on to “The Secret Hours” by Mick Herron. Thank you for your own book suggestions as I’ve read many of them this year, and I’d love a video on your own library and favorite books therein. Best wishes! PS. As someone who never knew how to journal, I found your life audit video a very powerful concept and this is the reason I set this goal for myself this year.
That is excellent news sir - the man who reads, is the man who leads! The journal swiftly becomes your confidential friend and also your accountability buddy, and all for the price of a book and pen! Best investment ever!
Amazing. Greetings from Cabo Verde Islands🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩
Great episode. Love this channel.
I’m 39 watching this and I’m glad that I have nearly everything you’ve mentioned. What’s the wallet you showed? I have a nice mini leather wallet, but I liked yours very much.
Carl Friedrik Swanfield wallet
@@TheChapsGuide thanks for the quick response.
This English teacher applauds that last recommendation. 100%.
The two last points are the most important to me.
Excellent!
I have used the combination of a blazer and matching trousers as an alternative to a suit for formal occasions for a long time now, I believe it has made me stand out as a bit more stylish than the average, it has got me complements at any rate. I would also say the possession of a kilt if you have even the slightest of Scottish ancestry is a must too. I have the full rig complete with Inverness cape. Ironically as I shave less I have invested in better kit for shaving that last bit of my chin to give me the right style. My watch is a Seiko Kinetic diver with a Nato strap, it is not a dress watch it is showing some "distress" but I think that says something about me too. Anyway 40 was a long time ago, I am getting closer to the big seven O now.
Kids here in the Netherlands are not allowed to have a cellphone in class anymore. Now it turned out that a lot of them have trouble reading the analog clocks at school.
Ash, Spot on concerning alcohol!!! Thank you for this list
Ash, another good video, My epiphany year was 30. It was the year that I stopped and reflected where I was and where I was going. I do reflect again and again but 30 was the big one for me. As for your last suggestion I have to agree with J.K. Rollins and yourself find a subject you like to get the reading bug started and then you should expand to all types of subjects. You did a really nice summary and reflection this time.
I'm 70 and am pleased to say I have all of those you mention. Regarding the self development plan: I had one at eighteen when i was on my railway apprenticeship. I thought I'd never be like the old steam loco filters with dodgy knees and aching backs, I was going to set the world alight......fast forward fifty two years, and here I am: suffering dodgy knee and an aching back. Oh and as for setting the world alight: that turned out to be a damp squib. Mind you 70 is the new 30, in my mind anyway, so there's hope for me yet.
Excellent content, Ash. The number of views this video is receiving is testimony to the validity of your list. To echo another comment here, I would add a good knowledge of finance / financial planning and budgeting as one of my essentials by the age of 40. Just curious, what is the book on your desk in this video?
It is a 1964 copy of You Only Live Twice by Ian Fleming. The 12th book in the James Bond series.
Covey ‘7 habits of highly effective leaders’ as a classic self development book. It’s not business orientated, and it provides a compass rather than a map. A compass can be used anywhere to find your true north, a map is only useful in a specific situation. Good list, having just turned 50, have come to this point, perhaps 5 or so years late. I wonder how many under 40s can appreciate this wisdom.
Again, agreed on each and every point. I fell in love with my Turgoen T16 Pilot watch. I own several watches, including my grail, the Omega Moonwatch. But when I wanted to celebrate a milestone in revenue for my own company, I came across the T16, learning that the Spitfire engineer created it. I fell in love with it and would say that it is my most beautiful piece. It is about what I like. Funny side note: Churchill is one of my heroes and I say that the Spitfire was the best plane of WWII. I am from Germany. 😂.
As someone interested in the Victorian style, I'd like to start using a pocket watch again (I once bought a novelty one at a Goth Weekend). But a wristwatch would be handy when dressing "casually" for getting me to look at my phone less.
Great video as always Ash. While I agree with the items on your list, I have to defend the Apple Watch. Paired with a leather strap or steel bracelet, it can be blended into a gentlemen’s wardrobe. In the spirit of “that which is measured is improved” a gent can track exercise, sleep, hydration and more with a smart watch. It also proves to be a valuable efficiency tool in the workplace. A gent can quickly check with a glance if it’s his child’s school reaching out with an emergency or the boss giving the go ahead to discuss an item in a meeting. While it’s equally rude to scroll a watch in a meeting as a phone. The Apple Watch affords a bit more stealth. While I agree with the positive statement a classy mechanical watch makes, as an older gent in the workplace the latest Apple Watch also makes a positive statement. It says that despite the receding white hair, I’m current with tech. Like everything else in life it is all a trade off. Thanks for the great content.
A very valid counter argument sir and I fully support the concepts that you put forward.
I'm sure you remember them: shirts with cuffs that can be either worn with cuff links, or be closed with a normal button. My father wore them all the time in the 1960s. You don't need french cuffs. And most of today's shirts can be easily altered. All you need is a second buttonhole.
Great video sir, thank you.
I like one more thing - things and tools you are using regularly, on a daily basis must be best possible for what you can afford. Quality stuff. F.i. expensive stuff, even the best in the world, if you use it once a year is not so interesting at the end. Sell it and give more for the things you actually need and use every day. And simplify - one thing, but the best.
I can add a small thing to the list, a good pen, it can be a fountain pen or not. I like the fact that you added self development and the library, most of lists like this one, have no such things.
Love your videos ❤
Thanks for the list Ash. Approaching 60 here. I do have most of these, definitely the book collection 😂.
I would add a dog, a convertible sports car, a guitar and a jump rope.
IMPECCABLE!!!
That’s the word to describe this man.
p.s - I would LOVE to know where be buys his ‘chino jackets’(?) if that’s the right word for them.
I love it!!!
Great video Ash👍
I needed to see this 15 years ago. 🤣. Please make a new one for 55. 😁
Lovely classic square faced gold dress watch not the garish diamond studded rolex.
Hand made shoes and long tweed coat.leather luggage. Never drink .carry one's self with respect and dignity. Never show off.
And LP Rocord collection
Hahahaha. I remember my other bought me a canvas duffle at a surplus store. I carried that everywhere with me - the gym, college, police college and then on my travels around the world. I stopped when my boss, a retired senior officer saw this and said "get away from uniform" which meant I was no longer a rough and ready peeler but a refined traveling gentleman.
The watch section is 100%. The attempts by people to metricise every aspect of their lives is utterly bizzare.
Very nice suggestions, thank you. The last one is high level indeed. Well done. P.s.: almost there, as I just need a leather case for my travels. Already have one for my job. 😊
I like your videos very much
Thank you sir
Things to own by 40:
1. A robust fitness, hygiene and grooming regime
2. Healthy eating habits/ alcohol refrainment
3. Good manners/ chivalry
4. Bad women
5. Goodyear welted footwear
6. Clothes that fit properly
7. A dress, field and sports watch
8. Lots of books
9. Hobbies
10. Fragrances
You are great, you are my Guru
Can you do a list of essentials for fatherhood?
A pregnant woman might serve as number 1 on the list, provided you were the cause of inflation.
Yes sir good video ❤
I’ve been an avid reader my entire life - could probably fill a house floor to ceiling with books I’ve read.
I don’t, however, feel compelled to purchase and display them. Seems a waste of money and real estate, and in my climate a habitat for vermin.
I’m perfectly happy supporting my local library.
But what well read vermin you could have!
Bravo Ash, another great post. You missed something you have in spades - a terrific vocabulary. Too many people recite bumper sticker cliches instead of fresh sentences.
loved this video and a lot of good advice. Just just a quickie, is it acceptable to wear a dark grey suit and black brogues to a funeral instead of black Oxfords?
Absolutely sir. As long as they are black leather.
@@TheChapsGuide Indeed they are.
Hello from Raleigh NC. I’m curious is that lapel pin a square and compass? If so then hello Brother.
The badge relates to a state award (MBE) - but I hope we can still be brothers sir!
@@TheChapsGuide of course sir!
Any chance of including a huge retro video games collection at number 11 Ash? Help me justify the amount of money that’s gone in it 😂
I am a fifth generation carpenter, my wife was attracted to me because I always smelled like fresh cut pine.
Great video, it’s sad to see the demise of a smart dressed man.
Hey Ash, I picked up a double edge razor. Do you have a recommendation for blade brands that a designed for sensitive skin?
I favour the Gillette Nacet blade, but every blade has its own characteristics and you will, in time, find a brand that suits you the best. Check out Ebay, as it is possible to buy mixed bags of DE blades of many types to allow you to try them out without buying a large amount of any one kind.
Have you thought about doing a video on cars?
I am not really that into cars to be truthful. I have owned the same car for 8-years, and my last steel steed was with me for 11-years (both VW Golfs).
My list would have included a life / accidental insurance policy to ensure the family was taken care of in my absence.
If you can own your own mind by 40 nothing else really matters
Another thing a man needs at 40 is a list of 10 things a man needs at 40. With respect to your comment on alcohol, I'll drink to that. As far as watches, I wear them on my feet so I never run out of time. I use perfumed ink for my signature scent. As far as a suit, I'm usually the defendant.
I'm intrigued by your scent collection, Ash. Do they not degrade over time?
When stored correctly, fragrances can last decades.
@@TheChapsGuidethat's very good news! Within the first clause of your response lies a clue as to why my experience has differed.
I prefer a British cut (not Italian or US) on a sport coat. 😉
Books!!!!……no one reads books! Yes, books. A library of good books is the best life companion you can have and if you read good quality books you will never feel you have wasted your life on transient things.
I don't carry a smart phone and use a watch. Ash, some of the younger folks cannot use an analog watch - they cannot tell time using analog.
Great video. AA for alcohol problems? You can die from alcohol. Liver failure, pancreas failure or brain damage.
Every room in our house has bookshelves that are packed. We are voracious readers, and have been from a young age. That has led to our being well educated. I have a BA and an MA. My wife has has a doctorate and two Master's Degrees. And certificates for us both.
Couple beers can’t hurt
@@БелорусскийРусскийБостонor 1 red wine with dinner.