I must say, that I can see the pain on your face, I am so sorry you suffered, are suffering, you are valued, even if it is from people on the internet. You have helped me with my journey, and I know many others. Please know we value you and your friendship
Just rewatched this, and we all feel like we don’t fit in, we all feel like we are a fake, don’t understand ourselves, hell I’m a lot older and I’m still trying to figure it all out
Everyone needs to be listened to. I'm glad you got clean and continue to work on yourself. Keep working on yourself. That is everyone's job. I'm glad people like you and are getting you gifts. people deserve gifts for any reason. Continue to listen to yourself. Being a human is difficult and complicated. I really like your videos; they are funny and important to share. Good luck in your professional and personal pursuits.
This is both heartbreaking and inspiring. Know that the goal to bring a smile to someone a day is easily met with me. Your videos always make me smile, even when sometimes they make me cry. Thank you for your honesty and transparency 🥰🥰🥰
Ooof. This brought up a lot of hard memories that I've mostly healed from, but they never truly go away. It's harder as a mother now, a mother of boys even. It kills me every time I hear you say "I did this to myself", but you were a child.
“Why do you listen to the crazy person who doesn’t have his shit together?” Because we’re all crazy and none of us have our shit together, and it’s nice to know we’re not alone❤ I don’t get excited about my birthday either, for some of the same reasons. Like “why are you people making such a big fuss, it’s JUST ME. Surely you have something more worthwhile to do?!?” For what it’s worth, I hope you got to do exactly what you wanted on your birthday for you and nothing else ❤️
Don't ever forget how far you've come. The little kid/teenager you were would be SO proud to see where you are today. You are important, you are seen, and you deserve (as much as I know u hate that word) to be happy and recognized❤️
I was on a binge of your shorts and then took a look into your videos. Just want to say thank you for being so open. Imposter syndrome is so real and I definitely feel that way a lot. You are lovely. Anywho, thank you soo much for everything from being funny to also bringing awareness to mental health. From a new viewer from the US.
I know you are not a hugger but I want to give a hug 🤗 Thank you for being so honest with us and letting us come along with you on your journey. Just so you know you do make me smile or laugh everyday 🥰 I just appreciate and adore you ❤️
People listen because you're relatable... and you've got charm... and they want to see good things happen to you because good things don't always happen for them, but they want better for you.
A lot of what I'm hearing is the imposter syndrome that comes along with ADHD, that unfortunately many people have, including myself, but remember even if you only have one person whether it's a friend, a therapist, or a family member. Just someone that you can talk to regularly that lets you reflect on yourself and help you work through your emotions, you'll start to feel a lot better, it's not going to fix everything, but it will make the days easier. I wish you nothing but love and peace ❤
Stuart, you are amazing, lovely and special! You DO deserve to celebrate your birthday! It's the one day a year where everything gets to be about you! Please accept this love! We all adore you. You have a wonderful personality, and although I've never met you, I can tell, you're a lovely person! *hugs*
Scarily relatable, from not being invited to birthdays as a kid to being uninvited or told not to show up to having no one show up to my birthday. I hope moving forward you can learn to accept being accepted. I mean that genuinely even though in text comments it might not come across 💕 much love and best wishes
This is so powerful and silence is so beautiful in the growth. Be very proud of your growth Stu. We see the amazing victories even when you struggle to see them. 🤗😘❤️🤗
With my daughter, I noticed a HUGE change in her when she went into primary school. She used to be so outgoing and funny, always cracking me up, but it was the other kids that made her draw in and retreat. I tried to always give her love though, and encourage her to be herself and not let them bother her happiness.
5:02 , this breaks my heart. You are not only beautiful on the outside but also inside, you are so talented, so kind, genuine and thoughtful in how you present yourself and how you want to help others. You are good. You are worthy. You are deserving. Even if all those compliments I had said before were untrue or wrong, that would not make you worth any less. I hope to see you in a couple of birthdays from now happy, and able to accept the love and generosity people want to shower you with. Until then we will keep telling you. (Also it's ok if the only person you make smile all day is you)
Stuart my heart goes out to you. It's a horrible feeling to experience! As a teenager I feel the same way, like I don't deserve recognition or companionship. We've grown up with similar family situations, my parents focus all of their attention on me and give me everything I could ever want. But on the inside I keep thinking that I don't deserve any of it because I feel like I'm a disappointment to them. Love you Stuart, I hope you have an amazing day and always remember that we have your back if you ever need us! ❤️
Phew...I have to let this vlog sink in first, because your story touches me very much 💜. But it's also so nice to see how those you usually put a smile on their faces, in turn, put a smile on your face in thanks. That is the cycle of smiles 😊 your cycle of smile 💜😊
Being bullied destroys you self confidence. It has taken years and the love of my husband (best friend) to overcome much of the unworthiness. Keep growing toward the light and hope you find both joy and peace.❤
I remember first watching this and taking it as nothing, but now re watching it and actually taking it in, it feels really sad but happy in a way. I am so sorry you didn't feel your worth as a child, I hope your mental health gets better and you start feeling more comfortable on a day that is meant for you. You are worth everything good that comes towards you and I hope you start to realize that. Some people might not like you and that is their opinion but you are amazing keep thriving man.
so heartbreaking but so brutally honest. you are truly a light in this world and you make so many people smile, think, laugh, and love (just reading the comments one can see the impact you have on others). 💜
Wow, this made me cry because I resonated so hard with this. Especially since my birthday is on a holiday, I always felt it was an inconvenience and that reflected to how I saw myself.
Stuart i know birthday can make you feel out of sorts. Been there myself. You are worth it. Wish i could make you see through our eyes just how special you are.
Everybody has had these feelings if they say otherwise they're lying. You help others by admitting your feelings so they can admit them to themselves. Please keep going with your awakening and believe in yourself. Rocky Horror Show Rocks!!!!!
You’re describing how I felt, or still feel possibly, for much of my life without me thinking about it before. You’re definitely an inspiration and have helped me begin to accept me for me and try to grow. Thank you ☺️
I feel the same way about my birthday or anytime someone will give me something. Even though I'm quite a bit older. It's still a struggle. You talking about it made me smile. Good to know someone else feels the same.
The reason why I would listen to your podcasts is because I feel pain. I watch you and see me . Your birthday is the day you started your journey to be the inspiration you are right now. The pain and the loneliness is the life lesson you need to overcome. You are doing great. I will be your cheerleader just because you try. That is good enough.
New to this channel. You are such an amazing man, and a major inspiration. You deserve the best and more. You really do. Going on previous comments, you have a lot of people who think the same, and support you in the moments when you feel that darkness will eat you whole. Being so honest and vulnerable is so hard to be, and I truly respect you for it.
It is never a matter of deserving something... It's a right. Since you've decided to live on earth, it is a right to feel loved, to feel hapiness, to feel peace. Never think you don't deserve it or you didn't do seomething valuable enough to deserve something. You don't deserve love, you have a right to feel it everytime and anywhere. 💜
A lot of the things you spoke about were so recognisable (especially the whole mental infinityloop of not deserving/humble/wait-am-I-an-egocentric-arse/not deserving etc). :) It's fantastic that you are a part of normalising talking about internal struggles. (btw on a semi-related note, I Loved seeing Translations!) Hello from a fellow Hufflepuff!
I was shocked how much your childhood mentality matched my own. I just thought I was messed up or broken/damaged. It was comforting and put my whole life in prospective.
Oy, loved this video. My husband and I also don't celebrate our birthdays. It feels false and honestly is a really easy oprotunity for someone to really really let you down. We try hard to show each other we are valued and love every day rather than trying to meet the expectations on one particular day. Still I hope you found some peace this year.
I get it. I’m actually surprised the feelings I am feeling, hearing someone say the same things in my head 😅 your fun video’s have definitely got me to laugh many a time. From what I also got from your video I will say it back to you “you deserve to be happy and loved” ❤
We have startlingly similar backstories which kind of explains why I often relate SO MUCH to you (I also don’t celebrate my birthday but it’s also on Valentine’s Day which is…not great) I have watched your journey for the last year or so and you have so much heart Stuart and you give of yourself quite a lot, whether you realize it or not. I’m really glad you have this awesome community around you (and you do deserve it, and I hope your journey brings you to a place of peace and acceptance regarding that). Sending love from LA from another awkward ginger.
I just watched this as a new subscriber poking around. I feel like through hearing you talk I'm understanding myself. Letting people in is hard. Especially after the door gets slammed in your face. (Similar situation.)
The one person a day you should make smile is you. I have spent many years circling the slippery pit I slip into, most of my life really. I am now taking medication to help and continue with therapy. We need to ask for help getting out of the pit. Depression is a liar and tries to make us isolate us. Fight it, everyday, it is the biggest fight to get out of bed each day and carry on. You are worthy, you are important, and yes, you deserve it. Take care.
We are all Masterpieces in progress. We are all a work in progress and the parts we see as mistakes and ugly parts are parts of that. Stuart, you have left an imprint on so many people. With the funny skits, the affirmations and videos where you share behind the mask (aka the dark and gritty). I know it has made me feel like less of a freak because it has let me know that I'm not the only one who has felt like that or experienced that. So thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing, talking can lead to healing. The feeling that you don't deserve (good/positive here) I totally get. I go through that too. When I was younger I had issues talking to others face to face. Actually I still have issues talking to people face to face. I have been able make friends though online conncetions like Discord and MMORPGs People listen because they can relate to the feelings/sensations.
Oh Darling. I am sat here on my birthday, watching this. Never have I felt so close to someone that I do not know. If I told you my story, it would be a mirror of yours. My mother sent me money for my birthday, and I quite literally want to vomit thinking about it. I am spending today working and listening to your voice, since I travel for work. I haven't said anything to single person about it being my birthday, aside from you now.
I, too, feel awkward about my birthday. I don't know if I have any advice for you., but I can say walking with you on your journey over the last year has truly inspired me to take up music again and post my own videos. Thank you Stuart, and enjoy your day.
I do the same thing. I buy myself a gift, usually a tattoo session, and then I have a movie marathon day, or I'll save Queer eye or Dr who for it. I had bricks thrown at me by the kids in school, plus lesser & worse bullying for 16yrs. For almost all the same reasons. The understanding & acceptance curve to be able to express it, rather than detachedly describe it is steep. I'm Proud of you for getting to the point where you can stay present while talking about it. And as for why so many people enjoy your content... there are more of us who went through a hell of our own making than you think. It helps to know we're, none of us, alone ❤
I'm new to you and your channel but I've noticed often in your videos you seem to have a broken spirit, and I've felt for you... I want to thank you for finding the strength to talk about this when many others never would. You seem absolutely lovely and I want you to know you light up so many peoples days... I went through similar things, especcially the not deserving the good things I got and I feel for you but your so so strong and you've got this!!🥺
Thank you, Stuart, for sharing such intimate pieces of yourself with us, especially since you didn't have to. Different parts of your story are heart-breakingly relatable. It was nice to laugh with you and to be part of the gift unboxing.
The beauty in growth is that you can heal and release your past. You have the power now and moving forward to know yourself..to understand YOU, instead of that wounded boy. It takes a lot of strength to do a video like this. You’ve come a long way Stuart. Well done. Sending you massive amounts of hugs and support.
Thank you for sharing. That resonated so much with me, wasn’t expecting it. Kind of a gut punch tbh. Healing is a long and tough journey. By just being yourself you have a positive impact on peoples lives 💚 be gentle with yourself, and when you need a reminder of your worthiness there are plenty of people here to help 🙂
You asked why we listen to you. There are so many reasons but I think the biggest one for me is that so much of what you say resonates with me. There is something comforting in knowing that others feel the same way you do. Even if at the same time my heart aches for you and everyone else here who go through this. Thank you for sharing with us. I hope your day was peaceful and silent
I am so proud of you for doing this video. So much to unpack there. Mostly, this video brought so many tears to my eyes. It breaks my heart to see the pain you go through, and it is very similar if not the same to the conflicts in my own head. To have external pain scar us so, that we add to those scars. To only feel validated for what we put in the world not for who we are. To work so hard to heal everyday. You are doing amazingly. Thank you, again and again. Every time you share your stories myself and many others feel seen. Lastly, thank you for always putting a smile on my face, and a positive thought in my head. Xoxoxo.
It's good to have those realizations now. I didn't stop caring so much into my mid 30s. There's an old southwest Airlines commerical: the tag was "feel free to move about the cabin". Feel free to move about your life for you.
You should know that you are really really really BRAVE person! Recently I heard that being scared, deppressed, anxious and nervous about something is actually BRAVE, not weak. Cuz you go on. Even if you do nothing about it - you are brave to stay and feel! And I think that is the inspiration you giving. May be you did not intend or understand it sometimes, but by going on and continuing your journey with yourself - you inspire people. I am in my journey too more than 15-20 years with all my anxiety, deppression and fear, and I really do feel you in that way. (I am trying my best to write it correctly in English - it's a foreign language to me, so I'm sorry if I am confusing you) All I wanted to say is that you're great person and of course there are sometimes when we feel that we really don't deserve something good, but I think that is what the PRESENT, GRACE and LOVE is - sometimes we get those for "free" without our reasons to understand. it is okay and that's what is beautiful about our existence. We get them and we go on hoping to be able to do the same to ourselves and others someday. Thank you for sharing your story. I donno if you gonna read it, it's okay if you don't. If you or anybody did, sorry that it is so long. But I hope you have a great day and great journey ahead. I will try my best too to do the same. Love you❤
Watching this was like watching my life. Every single thing. I pushed people away or tried to be who they wanted me to be. I didnt do so many things for fear of failure or rejection. Thank you. For both putting this into words and sharing your journey and experience with me. Its really nice to feel seen in the way that you make me feel seen.
Hi Stuart, far too relatable: I've only very recently started "making peace" with my birthdays, because I used to see them as the day in which I acknowledged all of my failures of another year. I've just started following you on social media and listening to your podcast and I want to send you a big hug and a huge THANK YOU: you talk about feelings and struggles I'm even too familiar with and your words are healing
This was such a breather for me. Recently I had a deep conversation with a friend and for the first time ever I opened myself to all the unhealed and scary parts of me. Though it was really tough to explain where everything might came from and trying to verbalize it all. At some point I kinda realized that I've been growing and gaining experience, that I should forgive everything (all in all) and that I shouldn't be afraid to go back to how I was.
Your transparency is so refreshing Stuart. You've been a tremendous help to me by sharing all of this. I think so few people realize, the more we put ourselves out there on social media platforms, the chances are good we're usually (in real life) extreme introverts with lots of insecurities. After all, we perform for love and approval... do we not? My tip for you is this, just be good to yourself, and other people... even if they don't deserve it. If you do that, you deserve all the love that comes your way. I sincerely hope this Birthday was one of your best (ever!)... and you actually enjoyed it... because you do deserve it... for all of the joy, (and entertainment), you so unselfishly provide. Knowing you're really a nice guy is just one of the many reasons I'm always Dueting you on TikTok! 😜 * (That and also because you're an amazing Actor!) - Eve McLain - Newsom ❤️
Stuart, oh friend... you sound so much like my son, bullied, insecure, socially awkward and unable to truly understand social ques. You bring me insight as to what he may be feeling inside but is unable or unwilling to talk about. My boy will be 16 in a week or so. Thank you!! Remember, you are absolutely beautiful inside and out. You are perfect just the way you are. You are loved and special. Keep your head up. Keep being you. The wonderful you that you are! P.S. my wonderful son is autistic, has pretty bad anxiety, migraines, and a joint disorder. I wouldn't change anything about him (except the migraines). And he LOVES Rocky Horror. Has since he was about 6 or 7!!! ❤ If nobody has told you today... I love you!
Thank you for opening up about your experience. I relate to a lot of what you have said and listening to you speak about it is so powerful. It's great that your growing and learning to love and appreciate yourself. And always remember that silence is good for the soul. Sending good wishes
First of all: Hello from Canada! You're not alone in a lot of your experiences and I can relate heavily. Trying to figure out how to fit in is very hard, especially when it seems everyone else got a "how to be a person" class and they forgot you weren't there that day. For me, anyway, I had a hard time understanding why I should be celebrated because I, again, didn't understand the Why. Why me? The truth is, it's more of a "why not"/habit for most people. They want to celebrate you so you can celebrate them. After a long journey of going through the same stuff and whatnot, I found there's a word for how we are: Neurodivergent aka "wired a bit different" There are folk stories about kids who were notably different and they figured they were fae children swapped in for their own little ones (changelings) So it's nothing new. Happy Un-Birthday, and be kind to yourself.
I love the happy "un" birthday. Such a great message. Im also neurodivergent and its frustrating. I HATE my birthday and I beg those around me to leave it alone because I do not celebrate it and people rarely respect it. Big kudos to you for sharing your knowledge and kindness.
I can relate to your pain, I can't say I know how you feel because we are all different, but you are deserving of love as everyone is. It is good to talk, and to get your feelings out. You need to believe in yourself, and know you are deserving of much happiness. I am getting where you are coming from.... Please don't put yourself down. You are an inspiration person. X
You are such a wicked awesome person! You deserve so much!🎉🎉🎉 I very been struggling with the same since around the same age (2 narcissistic older sisters), I know your pain very well (50+yrs). You've helped me realize so much about myself. THANK YOU!😽😻
I have never related to a video so much, I understand the struggle of feeling like you are not deserving I have felt like that most of my childhood. Thank you so much for being so open, you make people feel like they are not alone. You deserve all the happiness in the world, you make people smile, laugh and think, you inspire people to chase their dreams and love themselves. Never forget how amazing you are ❤️ happy birthday ❤️
I wish I could hug that pain away, but I'm afraid that's up to you. You'll have to keep working on yourself. I'll leave you with one of my favourite quotes: "You can't shy away from your greatness just because you are afraid you are not great enough [...] I can't stop you from failing but I can promise to make it safe if you do" Just know I'm extremely proud of you.🫂❤️
OK I was on the Premier and in the live chat so forgot to comment lol. All of what you said resonates with me, I don’t remember having special birthdays. But I do remember loving people making me feel special. And I hope that is what we do for you because that is what you do for us every day. You make us feel seen, understood, and important. Never devalue your self and what you give to this community because we will have something to say about it, sir. You are a remarkable man, I am lucky to know and love you. I hope today and every day brings you joy and peace and satisfaction and excitement. Because whether you believe it or not, you do deserve all of that. Accepting it is easier at times and harder at other times, but it doesn’t change who you are and what good things you deserve in your life. Happy Monday, love. 🥰
Ok, I want to hug you. It gets better. I was a theater major because it was easier to put on someone else's personality than to be myself. Socially awkward, never feeling sure of myself, hating my body, always on guard and certain that if I ever let people in they would "Carrie" me and I'd be worse off. That's how the first half of my life went. Then there came a day when I said fuck it. I made a list of all the things I wanted for myself and let myself BE myself. Shortly after I met someone who I could be my true self with. Who I could be the goofy, neurotic, anxiety ridden Hufflepuff, who is also kind and funny, and cries during commercials, and loves fiercely, that I am. Just letting myself BE myself and being happy with myself made all the difference. Because now I'm loved for who I really am, not the persona I tried to wear to get other people to like me (hello string of terrible relationships). Do I still get therapy? Oh yes. Are there days that I don't want to get out of bed because it is too hard? Yup But am I happy? So much so. Do I love myself? Always. Do I know that I'm worthy of love? YES! You will be happy too. Just being you. Happy (very belated) birthday, you beautiful Hufflepuff.
I experienced so much of what you have willingly shared. I feel like you were one of my brothers at that moment. My younger sister and brother at home bear the world on their shoulders. I wanted to tell you what I tell them : “ Give me all the pain and the hurt. I can take it.” You’ve come along way Stuart. Keep pressing forward!
I totally get the birthday thing. I’ve felt the same ever since I was a little boy. I’m an older grown man now, and mostly still feel the same, but birthdays are less of a deal when you get older, so that made it a bit easier. I hope you had a good day. Thank you for being you and for helping me deal with some of my own mental health issues. Every time I see one of your videos, you make my heart smile and I feel better …..even if for only a while.
Hello Stuart! I just recently came across your channel. You have brightened my day many times over! Keep doing what you are doing. Be true to yourself and the rest of it will fall into place. I have no idea what you have been through, or are going through, but this really tugged at my heart. I hope you enjoy the small things in life! A big hug to you and I wish you all the best!
Omg Stuart, you're incredible, I'm not just saying that to make you feel good (or bad) but you are, everything you said about your past and how you feel, it really hit home to me, I've always felt the same way, that I didn't deserve the love and affection that friends and family gave me, I'm 35 and it's taken me the last 2-3 years to realise that I do deserve love and affection, and you do too. I only came across your channel a couple of days ago and I can't stop watching, your Irish mammy videos always crack me up, (my mum was exactly the same) you've got great talent and I'm glad I came across your channel and subscribed because im excited for what your gonna do next! 🤗💕
(So you DO celebrate - it just looks a bit different than people might expect!) It seems this might come as a surprise to you, but you are definitely not alone in feeling that way (consequently, you made perfect sense). I'm not sure how we get these ideas in the first place - especially as kids? But look how far you've come! I know it seems like you've "wasted" so much time, but it is merely a drop in the bucket. Think of everything yet to come... You still have so much time to do anything you want with your life - you've got this! I'm proud of you 😄
Thank you for being vulnerable it’s what allows us to be human and the only way that empathy can be shared. You are amazing and you are loved. You are worthy of all appreciation. You deserve the world so keep striving to conquer it.
*retroactive hugs to your younger self*. You are, always have been worthy of love, acceptance and support. I had my own journey in learning that started at age 3 or 4 When the worst things happened to me. I still struggle with this but Like the Phoenix. I rise from the ashes, again and again. Just like you. ❤️ PS. I love The Little Prince too!
I wish I could just jump through the screen and give you a hug to make you feel better. Mental health is so important and so difficult at the same time. I totally understand what you are talking about.
You need to know sturt that you are amazing and Birthdays can be hard , but you need to give yourself that break that you are worth more than you will ever know , your videos have helped so many. And that's very special
But I can understand it completely, as being adopted not knowing much about my birth has been very hard , having parents that do not want you is hard . But on the other hand I am blessed by my adopted family that did get me ,
Thank you for your openness. I'm 10 years your senior and know that fear and inadequacy feeling well. So much of what you mentioned in this video I've felt. It's always good to know we're not alone. From my experience we really do get better with age, and time helps us heal 🥰 Keep looking after yourself, and thank you for the comedy, acting and silliness, you're such a delight 🙃
Thank you for posting this. Seeing this side of you is helping me understand and accept that side of me. You are appreciated!! I hope you had an enjoyable birthday!
I don't celebrate my birthday because it's either been forgotten, overlooked completely, dismissed, told it would have to "wait" or a huge disappointment. I've learned never to expect anything therefore I can't be disappointed.
Self-love is such a long, hard journey. Especially with childhood trauma. Thx so much for sharing with all of us 💛 this was wonderful and really relatable. Have a wonderful relaxing day tomorrow!
I go through the same feelings of not being good enough, feeling like I don't deserve things or deserve love. I carry a lot of guilt about my past. I did a lot of stupid stuff in my late teens and twenties. I made bad decisions and I feel like a failure. My parents and I were just talking the other day about it bc I had an emotional day and have been so stressed. My dad looked me in the eye and told me I wasn't a failure and he was proud of me. I burst into tears. I don't feel like I deserve to be loved or have anyone care for me. I have been so blessed that they love me anyway. Life is hard. I hate seeing that you are struggling too with things in regards to your bday and such. How nice it would be if we all didn't have all this trauma. I've grown a lot too and can tell in your videos that you have as well. You are an inspiration to me and so many others. Love your videos. I know I'm late to the party but I just discovered you around a month ago. So I've been watching your videos. Your mental health videos give me ideas for helping my own. You're a blessing. Have a good day
I must say, that I can see the pain on your face, I am so sorry you suffered, are suffering, you are valued, even if it is from people on the internet. You have helped me with my journey, and I know many others. Please know we value you and your friendship
Just rewatched this, and we all feel like we don’t fit in, we all feel like we are a fake, don’t understand ourselves, hell I’m a lot older and I’m still trying to figure it all out
Amen!
You asked, "Listen, why do you listen to the crazy person?!"
Because you sound like my insides feel, dear, and it makes me feel less lonely.
"Ring the bells that still may ring
Forget your perfect offering
There's a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in..."
Leonard Cohen
Everyone needs to be listened to. I'm glad you got clean and continue to work on yourself. Keep working on yourself. That is everyone's job. I'm glad people like you and are getting you gifts. people deserve gifts for any reason. Continue to listen to yourself. Being a human is difficult and complicated. I really like your videos; they are funny and important to share. Good luck in your professional and personal pursuits.
This is both heartbreaking and inspiring. Know that the goal to bring a smile to someone a day is easily met with me. Your videos always make me smile, even when sometimes they make me cry. Thank you for your honesty and transparency 🥰🥰🥰
Wow, thank you
@@HeyitsStuart we all love you Stuart
You know kind people can help you if you need 😊😊
@@bonitamak2578yes we do
Ooof. This brought up a lot of hard memories that I've mostly healed from, but they never truly go away. It's harder as a mother now, a mother of boys even. It kills me every time I hear you say "I did this to myself", but you were a child.
I know.....and I forgive myself xxx
You have a beautiful personality and a great smile. Your honesty is so appreciated. You deserve to be you. You are truly enough ❤❤
“Why do you listen to the crazy person who doesn’t have his shit together?”
Because we’re all crazy and none of us have our shit together, and it’s nice to know we’re not alone❤ I don’t get excited about my birthday either, for some of the same reasons. Like “why are you people making such a big fuss, it’s JUST ME. Surely you have something more worthwhile to do?!?” For what it’s worth, I hope you got to do exactly what you wanted on your birthday for you and nothing else ❤️
You are describing my childhood and I just want to hug you
oooof hugs
Don't ever forget how far you've come. The little kid/teenager you were would be SO proud to see where you are today. You are important, you are seen, and you deserve (as much as I know u hate that word) to be happy and recognized❤️
I was on a binge of your shorts and then took a look into your videos. Just want to say thank you for being so open. Imposter syndrome is so real and I definitely feel that way a lot. You are lovely. Anywho, thank you soo much for everything from being funny to also bringing awareness to mental health. From a new viewer from the US.
I know you are not a hugger but I want to give a hug 🤗 Thank you for being so honest with us and letting us come along with you on your journey. Just so you know you do make me smile or laugh everyday 🥰 I just appreciate and adore you ❤️
People listen because you're relatable... and you've got charm... and they want to see good things happen to you because good things don't always happen for them, but they want better for you.
A lot of what I'm hearing is the imposter syndrome that comes along with ADHD, that unfortunately many people have, including myself, but remember even if you only have one person whether it's a friend, a therapist, or a family member. Just someone that you can talk to regularly that lets you reflect on yourself and help you work through your emotions, you'll start to feel a lot better, it's not going to fix everything, but it will make the days easier. I wish you nothing but love and peace ❤
Stuart, you are amazing, lovely and special! You DO deserve to celebrate your birthday! It's the one day a year where everything gets to be about you! Please accept this love! We all adore you. You have a wonderful personality, and although I've never met you, I can tell, you're a lovely person!
*hugs*
i love honest you are about life. we need more people like you in the world Stuart. you are more than enough.
Completely agree, keeping it real
Scarily relatable, from not being invited to birthdays as a kid to being uninvited or told not to show up to having no one show up to my birthday. I hope moving forward you can learn to accept being accepted. I mean that genuinely even though in text comments it might not come across 💕 much love and best wishes
My most favorite quote...
Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It's only the sane who admit that they are crazy!! ~Nora Effron
This is so powerful and silence is so beautiful in the growth. Be very proud of your growth Stu. We see the amazing victories even when you struggle to see them. 🤗😘❤️🤗
Thank you so much!
I'm weird ,all the best people in the world is weird Stuart . ❤ I know you make more than one person smile everytime x
I swear, listening to you is like I am listening to myself!! I am the female version of you!!
Thank you for being open and sharing your truth. So glad you are on this journey and that we as your community can be there with you
Thank you so much!
With my daughter, I noticed a HUGE change in her when she went into primary school. She used to be so outgoing and funny, always cracking me up, but it was the other kids that made her draw in and retreat. I tried to always give her love though, and encourage her to be herself and not let them bother her happiness.
5:02 , this breaks my heart.
You are not only beautiful on the outside but also inside, you are so talented, so kind, genuine and thoughtful in how you present yourself and how you want to help others.
You are good.
You are worthy.
You are deserving.
Even if all those compliments I had said before were untrue or wrong, that would not make you worth any less.
I hope to see you in a couple of birthdays from now happy, and able to accept the love and generosity people want to shower you with. Until then we will keep telling you.
(Also it's ok if the only person you make smile all day is you)
Stuart my heart goes out to you. It's a horrible feeling to experience! As a teenager I feel the same way, like I don't deserve recognition or companionship. We've grown up with similar family situations, my parents focus all of their attention on me and give me everything I could ever want. But on the inside I keep thinking that I don't deserve any of it because I feel like I'm a disappointment to them. Love you Stuart, I hope you have an amazing day and always remember that we have your back if you ever need us! ❤️
I just spent most of this video crying lmao
thanks for helping me get my emotions out cuz it really helps to have a good cry sometimes, much love
Phew...I have to let this vlog sink in first, because your story touches me very much 💜. But it's also so nice to see how those you usually put a smile on their faces, in turn, put a smile on your face in thanks. That is the cycle of smiles 😊 your cycle of smile 💜😊
Being bullied destroys you self confidence. It has taken years and the love of my husband (best friend) to overcome much of the unworthiness. Keep growing toward the light and hope you find both joy and peace.❤
I remember first watching this and taking it as nothing, but now re watching it and actually taking it in, it feels really sad but happy in a way. I am so sorry you didn't feel your worth as a child, I hope your mental health gets better and you start feeling more comfortable on a day that is meant for you. You are worth everything good that comes towards you and I hope you start to realize that. Some people might not like you and that is their opinion but you are amazing keep thriving man.
so heartbreaking but so brutally honest. you are truly a light in this world and you make so many people smile, think, laugh, and love (just reading the comments one can see the impact you have on others). 💜
Wow, this made me cry because I resonated so hard with this. Especially since my birthday is on a holiday, I always felt it was an inconvenience and that reflected to how I saw myself.
Hey there, how are you doing now? ❤
Stuart i know birthday can make you feel out of sorts. Been there myself. You are worth it. Wish i could make you see through our eyes just how special you are.
Everybody has had these feelings if they say otherwise they're lying. You help others by admitting your feelings so they can admit them to themselves. Please keep going with your awakening and believe in yourself. Rocky Horror Show Rocks!!!!!
You’re describing how I felt, or still feel possibly, for much of my life without me thinking about it before.
You’re definitely an inspiration and have helped me begin to accept me for me and try to grow.
Thank you ☺️
You got this!
Same and it is a day to day process
I feel the same way about my birthday or anytime someone will give me something. Even though I'm quite a bit older. It's still a struggle. You talking about it made me smile. Good to know someone else feels the same.
Bless you that girl sounds like a spoilt bleeep we love you and wish you the best of everything.
The reason why I would listen to your podcasts is because I feel pain. I watch you and see me . Your birthday is the day you started your journey to be the inspiration you are right now. The pain and the loneliness is the life lesson you need to overcome. You are doing great. I will be your cheerleader just because you try. That is good enough.
New to this channel. You are such an amazing man, and a major inspiration. You deserve the best and more. You really do. Going on previous comments, you have a lot of people who think the same, and support you in the moments when you feel that darkness will eat you whole. Being so honest and vulnerable is so hard to be, and I truly respect you for it.
It is never a matter of deserving something... It's a right. Since you've decided to live on earth, it is a right to feel loved, to feel hapiness, to feel peace. Never think you don't deserve it or you didn't do seomething valuable enough to deserve something. You don't deserve love, you have a right to feel it everytime and anywhere. 💜
My older sibling also struggles with similar things and oddly enough the little priince is also one of her favorite child hood books.
A lot of the things you spoke about were so recognisable (especially the whole mental infinityloop of not deserving/humble/wait-am-I-an-egocentric-arse/not deserving etc). :)
It's fantastic that you are a part of normalising talking about internal struggles. (btw on a semi-related note, I Loved seeing Translations!)
Hello from a fellow Hufflepuff!
I was shocked how much your childhood mentality matched my own. I just thought I was messed up or broken/damaged. It was comforting and put my whole life in prospective.
Oy, loved this video. My husband and I also don't celebrate our birthdays. It feels false and honestly is a really easy oprotunity for someone to really really let you down. We try hard to show each other we are valued and love every day rather than trying to meet the expectations on one particular day. Still I hope you found some peace this year.
I get it. I’m actually surprised the feelings I am feeling, hearing someone say the same things in my head 😅 your fun video’s have definitely got me to laugh many a time. From what I also got from your video I will say it back to you “you deserve to be happy and loved” ❤
Learn from the past, but don't let it haunt you. Now you are ❤❤❤❤❤
We have startlingly similar backstories which kind of explains why I often relate SO MUCH to you (I also don’t celebrate my birthday but it’s also on Valentine’s Day which is…not great) I have watched your journey for the last year or so and you have so much heart Stuart and you give of yourself quite a lot, whether you realize it or not. I’m really glad you have this awesome community around you (and you do deserve it, and I hope your journey brings you to a place of peace and acceptance regarding that). Sending love from LA from another awkward ginger.
I just watched this as a new subscriber poking around. I feel like through hearing you talk I'm understanding myself. Letting people in is hard. Especially after the door gets slammed in your face. (Similar situation.)
We celebrate your birthday because we’re GLAD you’re here. We’re glad you were born.
The one person a day you should make smile is you. I have spent many years circling the slippery pit I slip into, most of my life really. I am now taking medication to help and continue with therapy. We need to ask for help getting out of the pit. Depression is a liar and tries to make us isolate us. Fight it, everyday, it is the biggest fight to get out of bed each day and carry on. You are worthy, you are important, and yes, you deserve it. Take care.
You are very brave to do, what you do with that backround. My greatest respect!
We are all Masterpieces in progress. We are all a work in progress and the parts we see as mistakes and ugly parts are parts of that. Stuart, you have left an imprint on so many people. With the funny skits, the affirmations and videos where you share behind the mask (aka the dark and gritty). I know it has made me feel like less of a freak because it has let me know that I'm not the only one who has felt like that or experienced that.
So thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing, talking can lead to healing. The feeling that you don't deserve (good/positive here) I totally get. I go through that too. When I was younger I had issues talking to others face to face. Actually I still have issues talking to people face to face. I have been able make friends though online conncetions like Discord and MMORPGs People listen because they can relate to the feelings/sensations.
Oh Darling. I am sat here on my birthday, watching this. Never have I felt so close to someone that I do not know. If I told you my story, it would be a mirror of yours. My mother sent me money for my birthday, and I quite literally want to vomit thinking about it. I am spending today working and listening to your voice, since I travel for work. I haven't said anything to single person about it being my birthday, aside from you now.
I, too, feel awkward about my birthday. I don't know if I have any advice for you., but I can say walking with you on your journey over the last year has truly inspired me to take up music again and post my own videos. Thank you Stuart, and enjoy your day.
I do the same thing. I buy myself a gift, usually a tattoo session, and then I have a movie marathon day, or I'll save Queer eye or Dr who for it.
I had bricks thrown at me by the kids in school, plus lesser & worse bullying for 16yrs. For almost all the same reasons. The understanding & acceptance curve to be able to express it, rather than detachedly describe it is steep. I'm Proud of you for getting to the point where you can stay present while talking about it.
And as for why so many people enjoy your content... there are more of us who went through a hell of our own making than you think. It helps to know we're, none of us, alone ❤
I'm new to you and your channel but I've noticed often in your videos you seem to have a broken spirit, and I've felt for you... I want to thank you for finding the strength to talk about this when many others never would. You seem absolutely lovely and I want you to know you light up so many peoples days... I went through similar things, especcially the not deserving the good things I got and I feel for you but your so so strong and you've got this!!🥺
Thank you, Stuart, for sharing such intimate pieces of yourself with us, especially since you didn't have to. Different parts of your story are heart-breakingly relatable. It was nice to laugh with you and to be part of the gift unboxing.
The beauty in growth is that you can heal and release your past. You have the power now and moving forward to know yourself..to understand YOU, instead of that wounded boy.
It takes a lot of strength to do a video like this. You’ve come a long way Stuart. Well done.
Sending you massive amounts of hugs and support.
Thank you for sharing. That resonated so much with me, wasn’t expecting it. Kind of a gut punch tbh. Healing is a long and tough journey. By just being yourself you have a positive impact on peoples lives 💚 be gentle with yourself, and when you need a reminder of your worthiness there are plenty of people here to help 🙂
You asked why we listen to you. There are so many reasons but I think the biggest one for me is that so much of what you say resonates with me. There is something comforting in knowing that others feel the same way you do. Even if at the same time my heart aches for you and everyone else here who go through this. Thank you for sharing with us. I hope your day was peaceful and silent
I am so proud of you for doing this video. So much to unpack there. Mostly, this video brought so many tears to my eyes. It breaks my heart to see the pain you go through, and it is very similar if not the same to the conflicts in my own head. To have external pain scar us so, that we add to those scars. To only feel validated for what we put in the world not for who we are. To work so hard to heal everyday. You are doing amazingly. Thank you, again and again. Every time you share your stories myself and many others feel seen. Lastly, thank you for always putting a smile on my face, and a positive thought in my head. Xoxoxo.
It's good to have those realizations now. I didn't stop caring so much into my mid 30s. There's an old southwest Airlines commerical: the tag was "feel free to move about the cabin". Feel free to move about your life for you.
You should know that you are really really really BRAVE person! Recently I heard that being scared, deppressed, anxious and nervous about something is actually BRAVE, not weak. Cuz you go on. Even if you do nothing about it - you are brave to stay and feel! And I think that is the inspiration you giving. May be you did not intend or understand it sometimes, but by going on and continuing your journey with yourself - you inspire people. I am in my journey too more than 15-20 years with all my anxiety, deppression and fear, and I really do feel you in that way. (I am trying my best to write it correctly in English - it's a foreign language to me, so I'm sorry if I am confusing you) All I wanted to say is that you're great person and of course there are sometimes when we feel that we really don't deserve something good, but I think that is what the PRESENT, GRACE and LOVE is - sometimes we get those for "free" without our reasons to understand. it is okay and that's what is beautiful about our existence. We get them and we go on hoping to be able to do the same to ourselves and others someday. Thank you for sharing your story. I donno if you gonna read it, it's okay if you don't. If you or anybody did, sorry that it is so long. But I hope you have a great day and great journey ahead. I will try my best too to do the same. Love you❤
Watching this was like watching my life. Every single thing. I pushed people away or tried to be who they wanted me to be. I didnt do so many things for fear of failure or rejection. Thank you. For both putting this into words and sharing your journey and experience with me. Its really nice to feel seen in the way that you make me feel seen.
As someone who feels and felt the same way for a long time, especially when I was younger, thank you for making this 💚
Hi Stuart, far too relatable: I've only very recently started "making peace" with my birthdays, because I used to see them as the day in which I acknowledged all of my failures of another year. I've just started following you on social media and listening to your podcast and I want to send you a big hug and a huge THANK YOU: you talk about feelings and struggles I'm even too familiar with and your words are healing
This was such a breather for me. Recently I had a deep conversation with a friend and for the first time ever I opened myself to all the unhealed and scary parts of me. Though it was really tough to explain where everything might came from and trying to verbalize it all. At some point I kinda realized that I've been growing and gaining experience, that I should forgive everything (all in all) and that I shouldn't be afraid to go back to how I was.
Your transparency is so refreshing Stuart. You've been a tremendous help to me by sharing all of this. I think so few people realize, the more we put ourselves out there on social media platforms, the chances are good we're usually (in real life) extreme introverts with lots of insecurities. After all, we perform for love and approval... do we not? My tip for you is this, just be good to yourself, and other people... even if they don't deserve it. If you do that, you deserve all the love that comes your way. I sincerely hope this Birthday was one of your best (ever!)... and you actually enjoyed it... because you do deserve it... for all of the joy, (and entertainment), you so unselfishly provide.
Knowing you're really a nice guy is just one of the many reasons I'm always Dueting you on TikTok! 😜
* (That and also because you're an amazing Actor!) - Eve McLain - Newsom ❤️
Stuart, oh friend... you sound so much like my son, bullied, insecure, socially awkward and unable to truly understand social ques.
You bring me insight as to what he may be feeling inside but is unable or unwilling to talk about. My boy will be 16 in a week or so. Thank you!!
Remember, you are absolutely beautiful inside and out. You are perfect just the way you are. You are loved and special.
Keep your head up. Keep being you. The wonderful you that you are!
P.S. my wonderful son is autistic, has pretty bad anxiety, migraines, and a joint disorder. I wouldn't change anything about him (except the migraines). And he LOVES Rocky Horror. Has since he was about 6 or 7!!! ❤
If nobody has told you today... I love you!
Thank you for opening up about your experience. I relate to a lot of what you have said and listening to you speak about it is so powerful. It's great that your growing and learning to love and appreciate yourself. And always remember that silence is good for the soul. Sending good wishes
First of all: Hello from Canada!
You're not alone in a lot of your experiences and I can relate heavily. Trying to figure out how to fit in is very hard, especially when it seems everyone else got a "how to be a person" class and they forgot you weren't there that day.
For me, anyway, I had a hard time understanding why I should be celebrated because I, again, didn't understand the Why. Why me?
The truth is, it's more of a "why not"/habit for most people. They want to celebrate you so you can celebrate them.
After a long journey of going through the same stuff and whatnot, I found there's a word for how we are:
Neurodivergent aka "wired a bit different"
There are folk stories about kids who were notably different and they figured they were fae children swapped in for their own little ones (changelings)
So it's nothing new.
Happy Un-Birthday, and be kind to yourself.
I love the happy "un" birthday. Such a great message. Im also neurodivergent and its frustrating. I HATE my birthday and I beg those around me to leave it alone because I do not celebrate it and people rarely respect it. Big kudos to you for sharing your knowledge and kindness.
You are enough as you are. Always. Listening to you helps me remember I’m not alone with my struggles. Thanks for your honesty.
The little prince is such a wonderful book
I can relate to your pain, I can't say I know how you feel because we are all different, but you are deserving of love as everyone is. It is good to talk, and to get your feelings out. You need to believe in yourself, and know you are deserving of much happiness. I am getting where you are coming from.... Please don't put yourself down. You are an inspiration person. X
You are such a wicked awesome person! You deserve so much!🎉🎉🎉 I very been struggling with the same since around the same age (2 narcissistic older sisters), I know your pain very well (50+yrs). You've helped me realize so much about myself. THANK YOU!😽😻
I have never related to a video so much, I understand the struggle of feeling like you are not deserving I have felt like that most of my childhood. Thank you so much for being so open, you make people feel like they are not alone. You deserve all the happiness in the world, you make people smile, laugh and think, you inspire people to chase their dreams and love themselves. Never forget how amazing you are ❤️ happy birthday ❤️
I wish I could hug that pain away, but I'm afraid that's up to you. You'll have to keep working on yourself. I'll leave you with one of my favourite quotes: "You can't shy away from your greatness just because you are afraid you are not great enough [...] I can't stop you from failing but I can promise to make it safe if you do"
Just know I'm extremely proud of you.🫂❤️
You have such wisdom in your comments Morgana...lovely 🌹
@@stephaniebeauchamp2581 I have my moments 😅 I think ultimately comes from a place where I think I wished someone told me those things in the past.
@@morganabevilacqua5050 Just like he said his affirmations are things that he needed to hear in these moments :)
Very well said, btw.
I'm a Leo and I can relate to everything you were saying.... We love you Stewart. Wish I could give you a big hug.
OK I was on the Premier and in the live chat so forgot to comment lol. All of what you said resonates with me, I don’t remember having special birthdays. But I do remember loving people making me feel special. And I hope that is what we do for you because that is what you do for us every day. You make us feel seen, understood, and important. Never devalue your self and what you give to this community because we will have something to say about it, sir. You are a remarkable man, I am lucky to know and love you. I hope today and every day brings you joy and peace and satisfaction and excitement. Because whether you believe it or not, you do deserve all of that. Accepting it is easier at times and harder at other times, but it doesn’t change who you are and what good things you deserve in your life. Happy Monday, love. 🥰
Ok, I want to hug you. It gets better.
I was a theater major because it was easier to put on someone else's personality than to be myself. Socially awkward, never feeling sure of myself, hating my body, always on guard and certain that if I ever let people in they would "Carrie" me and I'd be worse off. That's how the first half of my life went.
Then there came a day when I said fuck it. I made a list of all the things I wanted for myself and let myself BE myself.
Shortly after I met someone who I could be my true self with. Who I could be the goofy, neurotic, anxiety ridden Hufflepuff, who is also kind and funny, and cries during commercials, and loves fiercely, that I am. Just letting myself BE myself and being happy with myself made all the difference. Because now I'm loved for who I really am, not the persona I tried to wear to get other people to like me (hello string of terrible relationships).
Do I still get therapy? Oh yes.
Are there days that I don't want to get out of bed because it is too hard? Yup
But am I happy? So much so.
Do I love myself? Always.
Do I know that I'm worthy of love? YES!
You will be happy too. Just being you.
Happy (very belated) birthday, you beautiful Hufflepuff.
Just like you said, growth looks so good on you. So proud of you.
thank you xxx
I experienced so much of what you have willingly shared. I feel like you were one of my brothers at that moment. My younger sister and brother at home bear the world on their shoulders. I wanted to tell you what I tell them : “ Give me all the pain and the hurt. I can take it.”
You’ve come along way Stuart. Keep pressing forward!
Thank you for sharing. You’re perfect the way you are. Be true to yourself. Hoping your next Birthday is easier . So happy I found you. 🐾👣
I totally get the birthday thing. I’ve felt the same ever since I was a little boy. I’m an older grown man now, and mostly still feel the same, but birthdays are less of a deal when you get older, so that made it a bit easier. I hope you had a good day. Thank you for being you and for helping me deal with some of my own mental health issues. Every time I see one of your videos, you make my heart smile and I feel better …..even if for only a while.
Hello Stuart! I just recently came across your channel. You have brightened my day many times over! Keep doing what you are doing. Be true to yourself and the rest of it will fall into place. I have no idea what you have been through, or are going through, but this really tugged at my heart. I hope you enjoy the small things in life! A big hug to you and I wish you all the best!
I’m sorry that you are going through such a difficult time; I hope things get better for you! We love you❤️
Omg Stuart, you're incredible, I'm not just saying that to make you feel good (or bad) but you are, everything you said about your past and how you feel, it really hit home to me, I've always felt the same way, that I didn't deserve the love and affection that friends and family gave me, I'm 35 and it's taken me the last 2-3 years to realise that I do deserve love and affection, and you do too.
I only came across your channel a couple of days ago and I can't stop watching, your Irish mammy videos always crack me up, (my mum was exactly the same) you've got great talent and I'm glad I came across your channel and subscribed because im excited for what your gonna do next! 🤗💕
(So you DO celebrate - it just looks a bit different than people might expect!) It seems this might come as a surprise to you, but you are definitely not alone in feeling that way (consequently, you made perfect sense). I'm not sure how we get these ideas in the first place - especially as kids? But look how far you've come! I know it seems like you've "wasted" so much time, but it is merely a drop in the bucket. Think of everything yet to come... You still have so much time to do anything you want with your life - you've got this! I'm proud of you 😄
Thank you for being vulnerable it’s what allows us to be human and the only way that empathy can be shared. You are amazing and you are loved. You are worthy of all appreciation. You deserve the world so keep striving to conquer it.
*retroactive hugs to your younger self*. You are, always have been worthy of love, acceptance and support.
I had my own journey in learning that started at age 3 or 4 When the worst things happened to me. I still struggle with this but Like the Phoenix. I rise from the ashes, again and again.
Just like you. ❤️
PS. I love The Little Prince too!
I wish I could just jump through the screen and give you a hug to make you feel better. Mental health is so important and so difficult at the same time. I totally understand what you are talking about.
You need to know sturt that you are amazing and Birthdays can be hard , but you need to give yourself that break that you are worth more than you will ever know , your videos have helped so many. And that's very special
But I can understand it completely, as being adopted not knowing much about my birth has been very hard , having parents that do not want you is hard . But on the other hand I am blessed by my adopted family that did get me ,
Thank you for your openness. I'm 10 years your senior and know that fear and inadequacy feeling well. So much of what you mentioned in this video I've felt.
It's always good to know we're not alone. From my experience we really do get better with age, and time helps us heal 🥰
Keep looking after yourself, and thank you for the comedy, acting and silliness, you're such a delight 🙃
Thank you for posting this. Seeing this side of you is helping me understand and accept that side of me. You are appreciated!! I hope you had an enjoyable birthday!
I don't celebrate my birthday because it's either been forgotten, overlooked completely, dismissed, told it would have to "wait" or a huge disappointment. I've learned never to expect anything therefore I can't be disappointed.
I just want to give you a really big hug. ♥️
I appreciate this video because I felt similar things growing up. Thank you. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Self-love is such a long, hard journey. Especially with childhood trauma. Thx so much for sharing with all of us 💛 this was wonderful and really relatable. Have a wonderful relaxing day tomorrow!
You are so welcome!
I go through the same feelings of not being good enough, feeling like I don't deserve things or deserve love. I carry a lot of guilt about my past. I did a lot of stupid stuff in my late teens and twenties. I made bad decisions and I feel like a failure. My parents and I were just talking the other day about it bc I had an emotional day and have been so stressed. My dad looked me in the eye and told me I wasn't a failure and he was proud of me. I burst into tears. I don't feel like I deserve to be loved or have anyone care for me. I have been so blessed that they love me anyway. Life is hard. I hate seeing that you are struggling too with things in regards to your bday and such. How nice it would be if we all didn't have all this trauma. I've grown a lot too and can tell in your videos that you have as well. You are an inspiration to me and so many others. Love your videos. I know I'm late to the party but I just discovered you around a month ago. So I've been watching your videos. Your mental health videos give me ideas for helping my own. You're a blessing. Have a good day