Men Are Socialized to 'Act Inhumanely'
Вставка
- Опубліковано 24 жов 2018
- Thomas Page McBee transitioned at age 30. In his male body, he “started to experience the world differently immediately,” McBee says in a video filmed at the 2018 Aspen Ideas Festival in June. “I immediately gained a lot of privileges and also immediately lost a lot of connection.”
McBee, the author of "Amateur: A True Story About What Makes a Man," goes on to detail how his experience of male socialization later in life afforded him a unique perspective on the internalization of masculinity. “When you look at Harvey Weinstein, you're seeing an extreme of a socialized behavior,” he argues.
Subscribe to The Atlantic on UA-cam: bit.ly/subAtlanticYT
I' m sure the comments here will stay very civil and polite.
Yep, no doubt.
B4rtBlu3: I' m sure the comments here will stay very civil and polite.
*comments stay very civil and polite*
B4rtBlu3: I MUST ONLY USE THIS POWER FOR GOOD!!
"Biological lesbians". Spoken like a biological meathead.
As a 30 year old man, I appreciate the thoughts shared here. It might be uncomfortable to think about, but I see definitely the truth in his statements. Very interesting video.
you mean her statements
@@con10000000 No his dickbag
90% of the ragers didn't watch the video.
Quick facts: there /are/ studies quoted in the video. He is not saying men are evil, he says men are taught to show less emotion.
By whom and why? Hint: nobody wants emotional cannon fodder.
"he says men are taught to show less emotion." - he also calls that state "inhuman". Excuse me if I don't consider prizing objectivity and stoicism as "inhuman". Also, what of all the people, including women, that don't choose to live with their hearts on their sleeves - as part of their own personality, no socialization needed? Are they inhuman? Given that this video itself says most men are one way, what's more likely - that everyone else is brainwashed into some global hypermasculine religion, or that the few people crusading the other way are the actual people being converted towards some weird cult?
"he says men are taught to show less emotion"
This is just provably not true & the "privileges" she claims to have gained are not privileges at all & in fact the data would show she has it "worse" now. For example she claims that she gained "privilege" in regards to "not being afraid to walk alone". That is not a privilege, it's a feeling. Crime data shows that men are MUCH more likely to experience violent crime, especially at the hands of a stranger.
She also claims that as a man, she was "promoted/hired more quickly", when in fact a recent meta-analysis across the West proved that women have a hiring advantage over men in ALL fields & that this advantage increased dramatically in female dominated spaces.
She also claims that "as a man", she is taken more seriously when psychology studies have shown for decades that both men & women have an innate pro-female bias & women particularly score extremely high in in-group bias, whereas men showcase basically no in-group bias at all.
This woman is deluded & a pathological liar who hates men. Period.
Worst trait of toxic masculinity is not learning to shut up and let people make their point before retorting. This is examplified by the terrible listening comprehension in these comments.
This video: "The way men are treated is crap!"
The comments: "Why are you saying all men are crap?!"
I partially blame the clickbait title, but only partially.
@Black Knight Fool Go cut your bangs
If "the way men are treated is crap", then why isn't there much of an uprising among men against that and for whatever the hell he's promoting? Seems like the majority of these 'victims' think differently about their experience.
@@ArawnOfAnnwn Why do children in abusive households rarely stand up for themselves? Because it's all they know. If you're never shown a better alternative, it's nearly impossible to recognize your own oppression, and of course you'll deny it.
@@peterlewis2178 Cool psych lesson. Here's another - all people, abused or not, tend to like believing they know better. In this case it's very tempting to believe you understand all these men better than they do themselves. When someone hasn't told you something, that doesn't mean you can just jump to conclusions based on your own ingrained biases and beliefs. Also if someone denies something, that doesn't mean you can just rest easy declaring they're in denial and you know better. As for being shown a better alternative, we literally live in the noisiest society in human history, with people being exposed to alternative views at every turn. Unless you're locked in a basement all the time, you do see other alternatives. Them not choosing said alternatives is evidence AGAINST you, not for you. It's far more likely that you're wrong than ALL of them. Once again, stop thinking you know better.
@@peterlewis2178 And for a real close to home (close to the abuse you spoke of) example of this, consider how often folk jump to mention stockholm syndrome. Very convenient, gives you carte blanche to dismiss their stated views. And then find out that, newsflash, it doesn't exist. It isn't a recognized psychiatric disorder, it was and still is a pop psych creation of the media. Everyone just loves indulging their egos.
More to the point, culture and gender roles aren't "baked in" at birth. No culture is. An infant learns culture from those who raise them.
If you have an English baby that's adopted by Americans, the child will not grow up with an English accent and is less likely to indulge in as much self depreciating humor.
An American baby raised by English people won't have an American accent and probably won't be as straightforward as they would have been raised by Americans.
"culture is baked in" is bs. Infants can't even pick up their own heads yet along define gender roles.
I live in Texas, all the males in my family joined the service. I was inculcated at a young age into having a killing mindset (the male as protector). The values a culture sets for it's male and female population will drive what we are taught.
If you think about history, we spent a lot of time at war or preparing for war. Anyone had to go - if you were male. You had to fight and kill when ordered to, despite your own safety. You had to leave your family and put yourself up to be massacred, because someone with more power wanted you to - or you thought you were defending your own way of life. I give credibility to the socialisation theory. And I think football is part of our traditional way of training men to win at all costs, and submit to direction from a captain. At least in countries colonised by Britain who play the contact sports of Rugby, Gaelic Football, Aussie rules or American football.
I will never turn myself in!
What *specifically* changed when he transitioned? He should give some examples
I'm in a male body. I consider myself trans. I didn't transitioned yet. I'm 19. I lost that abalety to express my feelings even though I wanted to express them, and still want to. There is no one holding me back by bullying or anything so i don'tt get it. I want to express my feelings but I can't. I'm feeling trapped. Probably this is not what's going on in a guy's head but I feel like it's not happening only because the social stigma. It's a hormonal thing or some sort.
I feel that wrapping up your identity in one aspect of your being is to miss who you really are and make yourself a mere stereotype of your own making.
i like when lgbt people hide their own identity for fear of backlash an rejection .
Also, aren't the "hyper" alpha, bro type of men like this? Always making jokes about their dicks and shaming others because they didn't have sex? Always being one dimensional? And yet when someone adresses their one dimensionality they get hyperdefensive and they blame feminism or any ideology thats trendy to bash on.
just a thought
This man has confirmed what I had been saying for well over 40 years now.
This problem is once a man's been conditioned to internalize harmful masculine mindsets it will take many years of long, hard work to unlearn and will likely take at least a decade. He'll have to unlearn dozens of old habits and then build new ones.
He may have to change his social circle because most of his male friends may not want to grow and change with him.
He also has to cope with the constant reinforcement from his society to behave inhumanely. A man who works to free himself from it will very much be going against the grain, like a salmon swimming upstream against raging river rapids.
It will likely cost him friendships, job promotions, and career advancement opportunities which is why so few men want to do the long hard work to unlearn his cultural programming to be inhumane.
"it will take many years of long, hard work to unlearn" - brainwashing works both ways, you know. If you believe that society has internalized in men such a harmful persona, there's no reason to believe the reverse process isn't itself also an exercise an brainwashing. Given that this video itself says most men are one way, what's more likely - that everyone else is brainwashed into some global hypermasculine religion, or that the few people undergoing this "unlearning" (or, from the opposite perspective, plain old "learning", of a different ideology) process are the actual people being converted towards some weird cult? Or, if you don't want to take the opposite perspective because you find it ideologically unpalatable, there is a third option - just let people be and accept them as is as indeed being their true selves, no conspiracies about them having been converted en masse into anything. He gets to wear his heart on his sleeve if he wants, the rest of us get to tell him to shut up about us somehow not being genuine, or worse "inhumane". Speaking of which, where does this idea that prizing objectivity and stoicism is "inhumane", while wearing your heart on your sleeve and walking around with a box of tissues everywhere is being a 'real human' come from? Hell, there are even plenty of reserved women out there - are they also "inhumane"? Lastly, one can't 'confirm' anything with one subjective anecdote - that's not how proof works, unless you were already just looking for confirmation. There's a name for that bias. Btw, there was no social circle around me egging me to write this, nor has it reaped me any masculinity points. It's just an individual human calling out a silly argument.
Some of you guys: "Men have it hard too, geez get over yourselves"
This video: "I agree, and this is how society is propagating concepts of masculinity that hurt men"
Some of you guys: "Stop shitting on men!!!!!"
If men are being 'hurt' by these social concepts, then why isn't there much of an uprising among men against that and for whatever the hell he's promoting? Seems like the majority of these 'victims' think differently about their experience. He sees it as abuse, but it doesn't look like many men agree with him. These "concepts of masculinity that hurt men" seem pretty popular with their supposed victims. What's more likely - that half of humanity has Stockholm Syndrome, or that he's arguing that his opinion of these concepts are far more authoritative than everyone else's?
Being blamed for all of human suffering is hardly the way men would prefer to have their issues talked about.
I'm torn about this, I can see the pros and the cons of believing this is true. I think maybe the title using the word "Inhumanely" is a bit harsh. I think it's parenting, society, genetics and biology that determine who a boy turns out to be, not society alone. He does have some good points, he just doesn't have all the answers, just his opinion from his experiences.
@Black Knight Fool I don't see even a tiny bit of fakeness. I see a real human being, being as sincere as possible. Why do you think it is fake?
I know this is an old comment, but it's not that the way men are socialized makes them inhumane, it's that the cultural values of masculinity tend to promote certain inhumane behaviors and ways of being. Not everyone will adopt those values as completely, and the other factors you mention will obviously affect the extent to which they do.
But the larger cultural values and expectations are still ever-present and unavoidable, and it's a constant fight against the grain to unlearn a lot of those values ad behaviors. I was raised in an amazing environment that generally valued individuality and expressing yourself how you're naturally inclined, regardless of sex/gender. But even still, and even though i always prided myself on not conforming, I heavily struggle with a lot of the effects that the culture of masculinity had on me. These aren't things that you're explicitly taught, it's a pervasive culture that subconsciously influences you.
For instance, I've essentially lost my ability to fully cry. I can tear up, and form some tears, but neve more than that. The last time I fully cried was in middle school. It's not something I was entirely conscious of, but I was ostracized and seen as weird/weak when I showed this kind of emotion, so I learned to just suppress it and keep it inside.
My best friend had a much more severe experience. He felt the same pressure to not show emotion, but also felt pressure to like certain things, or to not like other things, and he was more susceptible to peer pressure than I was. he cared about fitting in, about being what he was "supposed" to be in society, so he tried to conform, and he repressed his emotions and personality to such an extent that he entirely lost the ability to even feel emotion at all. He was severely depressed all throughout High School, was extremely apathetic, and afterwards soon became suicidal. He tried to untangle the trauma and heal, but it was too painful for him, and he ultimately took his life.
My point is really just that while there are many factors, the overarching cultural expectations placed on men creates a pressure to be a certain way and to suppress certain human qualities that is hard if not impossible to completely escape, regardless of how you were raised. The topic is of course nuanced, but subconscious societal pressures play a much larger role than many realize.
I wonder what he meant specifically by “beautiful aspects of masculinity”? Just curious what he thought the pluses were.
I enjoyed the video, and agree a lot! Although I don't know how you connect men acting "masculine" and less feminine, with an unethical monster who got his sexual rocks off by abusing his position. Him doing what he did probably didn't result from, not opening up enough, and more how he was raised. Men like him like to get into a position of power to feel powerful, and get sex more often. I think he needed more of a moral compass. Maybe opening up, and being vulnerable would have helped him, but that thesis would also suggest that people who do horrific things, like gangsters, would convert and be good people if they talked about their problems. I'm sure plenty of gangsters had families, and maybe even were decent fathers, but just happened to kill people. But yeah, if I could have opened up as a 16 year old, I would have been able to let out a lot of things, and been helped. It's unfortunate there just isn't enough resources/good parents/therapists for every single human, and unethical behavior will always exist. Some of it is even genetics, and can be difficult to help. Some people are more prone to stealing/aggression/lying. ty for the video thomas and your perspective.
@theAtlantic, Please add citation of Study he mentions.
(couldn't hear the name at first: Naobi Way)
Thank you for this.
Did that trans man just lecture me on being a real man?
Yes, and he’s more of a man than you’ll ever be.
@@TheHexicle wtf does that even mean anymore?
"Transition" or "transform" doesn't mean inherently "changed his or her sex or gender identity".
That’s a masterful transition, props to your doctors :)
Hello fellow men
tutto corsivo
hello fellow evil one's
SHH if they find out we are men, they will kill us for being evil
I find myself aware with the differences men and women communicate: with their language, their bodies, their social engagements, etc. I see women saying "sorry" every 3 words and that being totally normal (and often expected as a social cue similar to "I'm aware of you, I'm not trying to be offensive in this group...") while men often will interrupt and speak loudly. Women use words like "I feel like you are ", "it seems to me" when making a point, while a lot of men say opinions as a fact, such as "this is" or "I am".
These almost seem like mandatory social aspects of gender-based language. Females want to cast a submissive beta image, men want to case a dominant, alpha image. This is not everyone in every case, but it is a learned behavior regardless..
To say its learnt demeans its utility. All behaviour is learnt. What is its function?
Everybody who says thing like you just said aren't a parent who raised young kids. Every parent will tell you that their boys and girls are totally different beings despite getting the same education and seeing the same people around them, and that is way before school years. There is a biological difference, but the fashion today is to totally ignore that...
And of course, they were not influenced by the people around them at all. The girls and boys were dressed in similar colors from day one and given the option of playing with the same toys. The boys weren't shamed for crying or called girly and the girls weren't praised for being pretty.
I'm around a lot of women regularly and they don't apologize all the time. Nor do they act "submissive", in any sense. I think they'd be offended by someone throwing them into this large pool of generalization about how "women act."
Oh you met so many people in your life.
I disagree. I think that men are socialized to be insensitive because there are a large enough group of men who are actually incapable of being sensitive that they can resent the difference of those who can be, and also the insensitive ones can be seen as models. What I'm saying is that the question "innate or socialized" is too absolute, I think the question is "what is innate for which subgroup" and then "how does socialization arise". And if there are men who are lacking in some kinds of emotional abilities that they had when they were younger, is that a tragedy, can something be done about it, how do they cope with that, etc.
Hi Tranz.
Speak for yourself mangina.
Exactly. How dare some imposter tell us men what to think?
Read title, get triggered. Didn't watch video because too triggered by title. Proceed to downvote and comment. This comment section in a nutshell.
All of these people acting all offended in the comments should grow a spine. Not only they've failed to understand the message of the video (which is dign of mention given how short and concise it is), but they're gone full snowflake without even stopping for a second to consider If the video may be right.
Let's go for some examples:
"Please stop crapping all over men."
He has crapped over *how men are socialized*. When you live in a world in which you have to defend yourself by being agressive or else you'll be seen as less of a man, the world will push you towards self-destructive behaviours that achieve nothing.
"Half the humans are inhuman? Thanks for that. Nonsense."
This huge snowflake read "men are socialized to act inhumanely" and interpreted it "men are inhumans". Must be sad to be so insecure that you think anyone around the corner is after you.
Gargarin:
That's basically all he's saying, but some of the men here are acting like he's slamming men, when, if they actually listened to what he's saying, that is not what he's doing at all. They need to watch the video again.
Please stop posting videos that are always negative towards men. It's boring and leads gullible young men to vote for Donald Trump.
How have you become inhumane or acted inhumanely?
I am drowned in love... Walt Whitman called it the measureless ocean of love within.
Society stole the bass in this man's voice
I always hear people speak about the "great" qualities that they find in masculinity in passing. I've yet to hear anyone speak on them and actually break down what they mean by great qualities. Though I probably will after I do a bit of googling.
I'm so glad someone is finally shedding light on our culture's dysfunctional way of raising boys.
Never stops to amaze me how trans-men in particular transition to a gender they clearly despise. What is the point of wanting to "be a man", if "being a man" is seen as toxic, harmful & awful in these people's eyes? Thomas' arguments as to how men are "privileged" also do not stand up to scrutiny. In fact, the data on these issues prove that MEN have it worse on all those accounts. She is talking purely based on her feelings as a woman. She will never understand what it's like being a man.
No anecdotes, they say you have no examples. Give anecdotes, and you're just sharing an isolated experience. You can't win in a discussion with the defensive men in this comment section because they'll always move the goalposts. To put it simply the problem is bullying and harassment are okay if you or the target have a penis. It wasn't harassment and no-one was bullying you: because that's "just what guys do."
I don't think men act inhumanely but if you say so , then you must admit that there are lots of absolutely terrible , cruel women as well
this just too vague
Ugiigi
This goes to show, you can take the girl out of the valley girl, but you can't take that valley girl accent out of the guy he became. I love this guy.
Spoke in fry tones attempting to deepen voice, didn't seem natural. Vulnerability isn't socially profitable for men. Women tend to be repulsed by a man displaying weakness. Men, on the other hand, can be drawn to a damseling woman, whereby they can fulfil an archetypal role of her heroic white knight.
Interesting point of view
1. I became a man at 30 and noticed that men are less openly vulnerable and don't find this kind of display very appealing in social settings.
2. I can't imagine a reason for this so it's probably a toxic, artificial social construct that ultimately leads to being a chubby sexual predator in Hollywood
People never seem to think about how this looks in reverse--if a man became a woman and starting lecturing them on how, "geez, women are so flaky, crying all the time, no wonder they make irrational decisions, we've got to teach them to rein that in" instead of considering the very obvious explanation that there are differences between the sexes that are natural and serve some kind of a function. For the record men are indeed vulnerable with close friends and significant others... they are just less interested in public displays of this kind of thing.
No, because why would you need to teach a woman that her emotions are too much? That's the point. Why does gender need to dictate how these people should and shouldn't act. Men CAN be vulnerable with their friends, yes but traditionally they aren't because of they are there friend swill think they're gay or weak or acting like anl woman. That is how it is for the majority of men on the planet. You're not helping by saying there is a difference between the sexes. You're saying there is a difference because of how society has been for hundreds of years. That's the ONLY reason there is a difference. Men can be emotional and whiny and vulnarable. You say they only do it among their friends but why? That's because they're taught to keep it hidden. That's the point of the video.
@@AndroidsDontDancewell said.
Negating:
Oh,please---some men don't mind being openly vulnerable in public---depends on what emotion they're expressing,though. Also, what's he saying is how quickly enforced this toxic socialization of masculinity is in our society, and how everything around us--the media,everyday life, family and friends, your culture---literally enforces that in every aspect of one's life.
this would have been much more conclusive if you had offered an example for your claim. Men are different than women, and both have their strengths and weaknesses. Both need to work together - it takes both. Being hostile against an entire gender doesn't get us anywhere, and on a side note, you shouldn't say generalizations like that anyway ("All men are socialized to be inhumane")
I think the problem lies in stating these things as facts that go for ALL men. This really isn't something I've ever seen/experienced myself. I mean, I might not be a part of the majority, I don't know. But still, touting these facts as absolutes feeds too he's only into the "brutal male culture mythos" that feminism today is really into.
What nonsense ...
I learned nothing from this other than one persons personal perception. Give me evidenced based science, not anecdotes.
It's sad that it takes a woman to tell this to men. I get the impression that men here in South Korea are significantly more emotionally competent than in the U.S., and this is felt to be very normal and completely masculine. And I suspect this to be true in other racially homogeneous societies, with the many cultural crises of mass migration impacting us psychologically in ways that we have nothing to compare against, and thus can not appreciate till travelling outside.
Its deeply troubling the extent to which women and trans-men somehow think they are entitled to define "masculinity" and label it as "toxic."
If someone mentions toxic water nobody assumes they're saying all water is toxic, yet somehow if someone mentions a toxic masculinity then people assume they're saying all masculinity is toxic. You don't add modifiers like "toxic" to things that are always toxic - that would be redundant. So, by adding "toxic" to the start of "masculinity", the speaker implies that that there are non-toxic masculinities.
I'm a dude, and I'm secure enough to not get all butthurt when someone says something about manhood might be unhealthy.
> Something something Toxic Masculinty and men should change their ways
> Men shouldn't tell women what they can and can't do
> DailyStruggle.jpg
@@TheAgavi Every god damn time people talk about toxic masculinity, people talk about men. Not a specific person, not a very specific group with names and face. Just men. You want to know what's toxic? Feminism. I've been on that shit for the last several years now and I'm more and more convinced Feminism is just a religion hiding behind science (Sociology, specifically).
Toxic masculinity is a term used to describe behaviour by males that is anti-social. In Australia one woman a week is murdered by their domestic (male) partner. Wouldn't you agree that's a serious problem?
So troubling. Listen, if you want to be a victim, then you'll construe any and everything that you can to fit into the narrative that you're being victimized. Once you're down that path, as is evidently the case, you're a lost cause. Inb4 "what about what about what about what about...".
I disagree. I was not at all socialized to "act inhumanely." You haven't given one example of how you started to act inhumanely since transitioning. I'm certain you remember inhuman behavior from other girls/women when you were female.
Talking about how inhumane behaviour can manifest itself from masculinity does not imply the same cannot exist for femininity.
All or nothing thinking
Translation: "What you're saying makes me uncomfortable, and I'm emotionally weak enough to internalize it as a personal attack on myself and to respond to that perceived personal attack by using whataboutism". Got it.
+Sam O Translation: "I can't speak to the facts so I'll put my words in some else's mouth."
@@longlakeshore Humor me; what facts do you have to dispute the words I've put in your mouth? And before you go into the classic 'the onus is on you...', may I remind you that even beyond its specific content, your comment in principle does nothing but 1] use your (presumably unbiased, objective, and globally representative) lived experience as your 'factual evidence' & 2] points to an 'other' scapegoat as a form of escapism from the topic at hand.
A 4 minute video saying men act inhumanely with no examples of that behavior. I expected better than click-bait from The Atlantic.
I honestly hope that 100 million people watch this, this is an important step on the path to understanding.
understanding why third wave feminism is cancer? when they call 50% of the population flat out inhumane with no reaction from the media
Not acting like a girl = acting inhumanely
sounds legit
????
or some people in position of lots of power and wealth are tempted with what they can get away with and or think they can get any women they want
some humans just are terrible or unethical or seems to have some lacking morals
I admit it is a very thoughtful video, but his (I guess that is the preferred pronoun here) insights strike me as having been made as an outsider. In other words, he does not really comprehend what it is to be man--perhaps because he does not have the benefit of masculine biology (DNA).
Isn’t this sexist?
Conflating your experience in transitioning from being a woman to a man is one thing. However, making claims about specific behaviors and their origin is quite another thing altogether. There is no evidence for the claims this person makes, other than their own subjective anecdotal claims. Further, I have witnessed females of all ages acting with certain malice, cruelty, and viciousness that most men would never dream of. It just manifests in different ways, and our society tends to give it a pass, because WOMEN HAVE PRIVILEGE. Saying that Harvey Weinstein's behavior is 'socialized' is just nonsense. There is ample evidence of the biological primate behavior of transactional sexuality within not only our species, but other primate species. Females willingly initiate and knowingly trade sex for food, for protection, for social status affiliation, for money, etc. Females seek out males to manipulate, and take part in these transactions across multiple primate lines willingly and with full knowledge of the game afoot. I understand the desire of feminists and others to want to modify the rules of the game, but good luck going against 2.5 million years of evolutionary biology.
Being born and raised a man, with XY genes, cannot possibly be the same as transitioning/altering your superficial phenotype later on in life. It just can't. So I'll take this person's viewpoint with a massive grain of salt, thanks!
Also, as a straight woman, I'm drawn to the mentally (and physically) strongest men in any group. It's an innate setting. It might just be me, but I'll never swoon over the guy who's busy being vulnerable. That's just how it is.
So what is it that makes a man vulnerable??
Virtusetviti Crying all the time, no money, no brain, no charisma, no courage, lazy, submissive, physically weak / unhealthy.
The guy I like right now is basically penniless. He used to be a para commando in the army and a professional kickboxer. I've never seen him break down emotionally. He's not looking to be vulnerable; he's looking to take every possible advantage, that's above board and legal, to bring himself and his family into a better situation in life. I admire that. Women admire capable men. If he ever gets vulnerable naturally, that's totally cool. It's this looking to be vulnerable on purpose that's irritating. Money means squat in the end. Capability and emotional/mental toughness is all. (At least for me.)
Good comment babe
I understand in Marxist theory you have yet to understand the difference between men and woman, but here let me try to explain it to you in layman's terms men are engineered to be harder, stronger, and more defensive in order to defend the tribe, or nation, woman are the other side to be nurturing, caring, and empathetic in order to care for not only the children, but also the man
You don't get it, men still have empathy just in a different maner than a woman.
Stop acting like such a wuss. All you're doing is projecting your insecurities about your gender onto men
Being a man is not Inhumanely, its manly.
It didn't change when I was 16, Ive been like this my entire life. It's just who I am.
The video makes no claims to the effect of "men aren't insecure by nature". Rather, it aims to explain how society has taught boys and men to repress this empathy and be more "manly". The video is not saying that men are inherently inhumane, nor that all of a sudden, 16-year-old boys become inhumane. It's merely describing the socialization of boys, stating that on average, this socialization begins to show itself in a major way at roughly age 16.
@@notquitegringo7997 I understand what claims the video made, however I was refuting the claim that socialization has repressed empathy in men and Instead I made the point that men are inherently different from woman and express their empathy in a different way and also in different situations.
Most of society is tailored for a woman so its easy to forget we are different types of people, as a man I dont see it as a big problem but its clearly reflected in many parts of modern society. Take for instance the educational system where woman are by far outperforming men
I can't believe he used to be a woman. In fact, I *don't* believe it.
Transgender men transition a lot easier than transgender women.
Hahahaha beautiful ways to be a man.... nice... i'll, uh... try that... hahaha
Misandrie.
Biology is a thing
Yea, this is what men need, a bearded woman telling them what masculinity really should be.
He made the leap from "men don't like other men to be vulnerable around them in social setting" to "boys are systematically raised as sociopaths with no empathy because society lets them get away with little bad actions". This is an insane leap that can't possible be justified in a 3min video. Combine that with the sweeping accusation to all male viewers that: 'you're all heartless and inhuman, but like... its not your fault and I want just want to fix you', is not going to get anyone on this person's side, it comes across as an attack on each individuals character. This is shallow, provocative commentary from someone with no credibility and the backlash should be surprising to no one.
I think there is a real issue in the way boys are raised and socialised into their transition as men that has only gotten worse over time in schools and many homes. There is a discussion to be had, but this video gives no good case for it.
The problem is not nature, it is nurture.
Men, don't take offense to it, get off your soap boxes, put out the tiki torches, drop the megaphone.. He's not saying you are bad, he is saying you are encouraged to be bad.
Being human does not mean you can only be humane when you act like a woman.
not a man!!!!
This talk had no substance. No examples. No concrete studies. No history. This snipped was 100 % male shaming and 0 % facts. I can't understand why would you publish such nonsensical speech into the world and why do you think that shaming and putting 50 % of the population in the toxic group is helpful to anyone. I will not stand for this kind of childish behaviour at my vicinity and I will call out all and any hypocritical man, woman and transpersons.
Of the top of my head I can think of many good reasons why simply having lots of testorone in your body would condition you brain from childhood to adulthood to having less empathy. It's not a maladaptation it is a very powerful and beneficial adaptation. Consider the world before the industrial revolution and even further back to our hunter past. If a hunting man would have been overly emotional about killing a wild beast then nobody would have gotten any meat to eat. So there's a fact for you to think about.
We can't just delete these adaptations from our lineage just because some feminists don't like it and I see how being a man is still beneficial today in negotiations and many other places… If you are going to make such outlandish claims as in this monologue at least try to mention one fucking fact or example even about what you are talking about… The bar for male bashing is so low these days that it is just resting on the ground in a ditch.
There are studies quoted in the video if you watched it.
Jarvisalo:
You're obviously not getting what he was saying at all. Being critical of how men are socialized isn't "male-bashing", so get off that nonsense and get over yourself calling it "childish" simply because you don't understand what he said---basically, because it's true. The whole point he was making is about how men are socialized to not show any feelings at all, and called "weak" if they do, and how until recently they were only allowed to express themselves through anger, period. It dosen't have a damn thing to do with how men used to hunt a million yeas ago. Men still hunt today, so what's your point?
You haven't got one because you didn't understand the point he was trying to make at all. Keeping your feelings inside isn't normal for either men or women, and with men, that can and has hurt their relationships with women, and other men. The other point is that there is more than one way to be a man, just as there is more than one way to be a woman, and it's not longer the straight-jacketed limited traditional outdated ways it used to be.
@@alondathomas293 :
What I heard was that there have been studies where it has been shown that when boys start puberty that they become less sensitive to emotions and start behaving more like the stereotypical man. I didn't hear a compelling argument about the socialization that supposedly supports this transition. What I did hear is a persons opinion about what they experienced when transitioning and then their comparison to what they were expected to be before and what was expected after did not match. Then there was a poor example of trying to condone predatory behavior as an extreme manifestation of the masculine when it has always been described just predatory...
What my point was all about is that men and women brains are fundamentally different. Men are less interested in emotions and people. Women are less interested in mechanical things and physics. That's just the way "most" people are.
Also almost none of the things you pointed out were actually mentioned in the talk, so you are just projecting what you wanted to hear.
And also sad but true... Men are still supposed to be more rational and less emotional...
I'm calling it childish because that is exactly what the viewpoint is. "Male culture" or "masculinity" is just as much a myth and a fantasy as this person who JUST transitioned to be a man describes it to be to them.
What a great video
Menbad.exe
Iamawhamen.exe
Toxicmasculinity.exe
Nyuprofessor.exe
Half the humans are inhuman? Thanks for that. Nonsense.
Inhumane and "inhuman" are not the same in any way.
Thomas Day
inhumane :
adjective
without compassion for misery or suffering; cruel.
inhuman :
adjective
lacking human qualities of compassion and mercy; cruel and barbaric.
Grow up Thomas
ChezNight
Sure, but that’s not our friend in the video said, is it?
And your statement doesn’t acknowledge that women are part of our society too. It’s a duet not a duel my friend. We are all in it together.
Surely you would agree that labelling one half of society “inhuman” based on their gender is sexism?
Not enough Terrigen Mist for that, my friend.
you are not a man
I'm sorry but if you havent grown up as a man then you don't know how we are socialized. We get to tell you. Thanks.
Good Lord, Unsubscribed.
Good riddance
At the same time, let's not pretend that a trans man has the same experience as a biological man. Your antidote is meaningless beyond your ideology.
Thanks! I will have good riddance :).
People like you are the same ones always complaining about liberal bubbles
I can see where you are coming from, but here I have been subscribed to the Atlantic, and many other left-leaning sources for years. Generally, I enjoy the Atlantic's videos about unusual and unique people, but I am so tired of hearing in some form or another that, men are essentially defective women and other leftist dogma. This mode of thinking is ubiquitous from left-leaning sources, that we all must recognize the "evil" within when found at the bottom of the progressive stack. No mind to me though, I am easily discredited, I have the evil inside as the Cis-hetero-white-privileged-male that I am. I am probably racist too to boot.
Fewer Weinsteins,, not less Weinsteins. Before you transitioned you spoke grammatically. Go back.
i have no words for how dumb and hypocritical this is, honestly, i dont even have words