whats funny is if you really think about it; Pinocchio might be the ONLY movie this producer HAS SEEN! lmao! are there other movies the Producer Ryan references as if he's actually seen it?? is Stromboli, Producer Ryans favorite character?? lmao!
Producer guy was there when the original was made n he got a lot of money from it so, he's gotta remember Screen writer guy is a hack writer with no time for research before doing a CGI remake
Gotta love how Ryan didn't even mention Pinocchio's love interest, she has _so much_ impact to the story that the movie doesn't change anything if you erase her scenes
there was a love interest in the new one ? ... oh I forgot. It's 2022 ... there's got to be a love interest for the main character even if it makes zero sense at all. :D
The original Pinocchio contained roughly 14,000 metaphors about maturity, responsibility and the human condition. Somehow, the AI that wrote Pinocchio 2022 managed to avoid recognizing a single one of them. It's almost impressive, like dodging raindrops in a storm.
That's because the AI that wrote 2022's Pinochetio was given the instruction to rewrite Pinocchio so the main character is perfect, doesn't have to learn anything, and is only a victim of circumstance, under the belief it would appeal to the college aged, infant minded, technicolor-haired, left of Karl Marx, social justice lynch mobsters who think they're perfect, don't have to learn anything, and are only victims of circumstance; just like all the other "cUrReNt yEaR" pig slop about strongk, empowahed MaRey SuuUuuues who are perfect, don't have to learn anything, and are only victims of circumstance. Odd that the Soulless Disney Corporation would try to remake their classic animated films to cater to those people, since Walt Disney built an empire by making art for adults and children alike, who could grow up and pass those stories onto their children, but SJLMs don't have kids, because they aborted all of them.
"Hey sir, we've made a rough draft of the men drinking and smoking at-" "NO ALCOHOL NOR CIGARS!" "Uh- ok I guess, but in the original it-" "...animate this poop." "What? What are you calling poop?" "No I mean we've got a scene where he sniffs some poop. Please animate it." "(screaming internally) oh, ok..."
“Do you think we may be missing the entire point of the original movie?” “I don’t care” I am 100% certain this was an actual conversation with Disney Executives
You have to give Disney one: every time you think they simply can not come up with a even worse live adaptation then the last one, they take up the challenge and prove you wrong...
@@priscillanotpresley new ideas are risky ... can't afford risks when there's money that needs printing. (applies to the entire entertainment industry since the dawn of time ... ) Also keep in mind that Pinochio's story (and pretty much all of the original classics were public domain ... so no licensing and a free script.
@@priscillanotpresleyexcept their new ideas suck, too. Wish sucks. Turning Red sucks. Strange World sucks. Elemental sucks. At this point Disney is looking for water to stop their cash from burning, and they keep finding oil.
I vowed never to watch another live action Disney remake after...I don't actually remember, something in the 2010's...so these Pitch Meetings are wonderfully cathartic in that they affirm my decision.
Best thing about watching this channel is when I’m watching on my iPad, my wife can’t see what I’m watching, and when she sees me cracking up, she says, “You’re watching Pitch Meetings, aren’t you?”
_"I don't care"_ literally made me laugh out loud. Nice twist on the catchphrase, and the sentiment broadly applies to all of Disney's live-action remakes.
I remember the scene in the original movie where the kid turns into a Donkey and calls out to his mom in fear of his own life before completely losing the ability to speak and starts going crazy in front of Pinocchio. That scene scared the crap out of me as a kid. Imagine what this scene could've looked like in a modern live action adaptation if properly done right, I was really looking forward to being scared again as an adult.
I can't believe Disney thought that is too inappropriate. It's supposed to be scary, like if you do bad things, binge drink, smoke, destroy people's property, consequences (possibly dire ones) will follow. You make a jackass out of yourself by doing these things and any kid can pick that up.
I don't know if there is an english dub but i suggest you the last italian adaptation (2019), Garrone's "Pinocchio". It's more close to the original novel rather than the disney cartoon. The scene of donkey trasformation is kinda scary XD
Yikes. It sounds horribly scary, but at the same time it's sort of classic Grimm's fairy tale territory; those guys didn't mince around with the personal responsibility. Now I actually _want_ to see the original animated movie. Admittedly, in the CGI version I think I'd want to see it toned down a bit. Scaring is okay, scarring not so much.
Every Pitch Meeting is tight. But somehow this one was a true gem, I was laughing far more than usual. Maybe it was the brilliant variety of vaguely almost-Pinnochio-ish names. Or the beautiful evolution of "I DON'T know!" into the more honest "I DON'T care!"
Yeah. I felt the message from the original movie was that the world is scary and you can't trust anyone and you'll be punished for doing things you didn't understand.
I'm still flabbergasted that they didn't know what the original movie was even about. How is that at all possible? And it's not a very obscure movie - you can even watch it today, and ask people about it.
All jokes aside in Italy (as many countries in the world) even just 50 years ago was normal for kids to walk by themselves everywhere as part of groups generally. My mom for exalmpe used to go to elementary school alone in the south of Italy. Things changed around the 80s I guess, for some reasons.
Imagine being passionate about cinema and animation, working literal blood, sweat, and tears to get a chance to work for perhaps the biggest name in that specific area, only to have your first day animating a “live action” Pinocchio going out in the new unexplored world and one of his first acts is sniffing the excrement of some unidentified animal on the street. Yeah, I doubt the irony is lost in the producers, but you know, money.
@Doctah Wahwee we basically re-entered the Disney era of Cinderella 3 cash grabs, but with higher budgets and accusations of racism to avoid how shitty they are
I always thought it was funny how Jiminy Cricket, who really does look like a grasshopper, was offended when Lampwick asked, "Who's the grasshopper?" in the animated classic. But right now, I just did an image search, and it turns out that there ARE green crickets that look just like Jiminy.
Oh boy. I'm an animator and being an animator was my dream career. I literally put off trying to enter the industry for a couple years because I didn't wanna be stuck dedicating weeks to working on stuff like the crap sniffing scene. Thank you for mentioning stuff like this. Means a lot.
Good for you. One should not have to do things in their dream career that do not align with their dreams, wants and desires. Otherwise what is the point of a dream career? It may as well be a fantasy.
@Caroline LA Exactly. I can't imagine glorifying boycotting your own dreams because of the prospect of it becoming work. They may well be a bot tho. Same as me.
@Caroline LA Eh, don't get me wrong. I took the job in the end, and I'm happier for it, but I think there's something to be said about loving an artform, but hating the artlessness that it turns into. Imagine you had ideas and worked hard to become a skilled painter, only to spend weeks painting a pile of shit, and having the client send it back with notes like asking you to try another shade of brown. And you may not realize this, but there's a surprising amount of stuff like that in movies. I'd heard a teacher describe the medium as 'polishing turds, all day.' When you're young and passionate and maybe a little prideful, that's enough to make you think twice. Lol in the end I thought to myself that if I had any pride as an animator, I'd give them the best pile of shit they'd ever seen in their life.
I'm old this was one of the first movies I ever saw as a kid . The whole point of the movie was Lying and doing Wrong had consequences . They should have left well enough alone
It's what happens when your company is being run by people hired strictly on their skin color, who they sleep with, and who they voted for. NOT for any TALENT.
Gosh, this checklist of what is and isn't advisable for a safe, mainstream, four-quadrant movie is suffocatory. Personally, I think increased representation is good, but Pinocchio needing to be faultless and the kids not really being allowed to misbehave removes Pinocchio's character arc and robs the story of a narrative point of view or purpose.
I wanna see him and CinemaSins attempt one each. CinemaSins used to be slightly entertaining but the guy quickly became a douchebag. The videos also never really challenged the nonsense of movies, and were instead full of bad jokes that contradicted each other. His movie would probably be terrible but he would try to play it off as intentional. Then he would make a video picking it apart. Meanwhile, Ryan George would put out something real classy and coherent, tight and barely an inconvenience.
So …they basically got rid of alll the conflict? Ah yes. Great storytelling. Very exciting when a character doesn’t have to face…. Any challenges, or learn any lessons.
My friend and I watched this a couple of nights ago, so naturally she and I were confused about the "creative" decisions this movie made. Thankfully, all of our questions are answered here, and they all seem to have the same answer... "Money!" Thankyou guys for clearing things up! Much love!
@@MrBrock314 Yes, this genuinely confuses me. Disney keeps shilling out these live action remakes and they are all just bad. Like, not just mediocre, but insulting to the original level bad, as if it was intentional. And I just don't get it, why do they keep making these?
"Do you think we might be missing the entire point of the original?" "I don't care!!" Seems pretty accurate 😂 didn't even realize this movie came out yet, but gotta love watching the pitch meeting instead of suffering through the actual movie!
*Everyone:* Hey Disney you know the point of the beer and smoking and the lying is that they're bad right? *Disney:* Yep *Everyone:* And you know you can show these things in a movie geared towards children as long as there's a lesson behind why they're bad right? *Disney:* Yup. *Everyone:* So, if you show Pinoke drinking, smoking, lying and making the point that it's BAD to do those things, then there's no need to change those things right? *Disney:* That makes sense to me. *Everyone:* SO WHY DID YOU CHANGE THE BEER TO ROOT BEER, REMOVE THE SMOKING, AND HAVE PINOCCHIO ESCAPE BY LYING?! IT UNDERCUTS THE ENTIRE MESSAGE. *Disney:* gonna need you to hop all the way off my back about this.
To be fair, Disney probably would've faced child endangerment laws if they ordered actual kids to drink and smoke for a movie. In animation, you have a lot more freedom to make characters do what you want. Still doesn't justify this soulless remake when there's an upcoming Del Toro adaptation that'll be much more entertaining.
While I don’t like to take example a reflect it on to a whole group, this is something that is wrong in children’s movies, specifically those that are suppose to teach a lesson. They want to teach a lesson about something wrong/bad but aren’t allowed to show the bad thing undercutting any strength the message had.
The beloved tale of Pineapple Chai. Loved by a latte people. I actually popped the dvd of the original cartoon in for some younger relatives and had to fast forward some of the scenes because they were frankly insane. Especially pleasure island! Maybe it was the animation that was so freaky.
honestly, it made me think about how Hollywood likely has a real pleasure island or two....and we should most definitely be uncomfortable about what happens there
Anybody remember they already did a live-action Pinocchio in 1996 with Jonathan Taylor Thomas from Tim Allen’s Home Improvement? THAT was a fantastic, excellently-done film that absolutely honored and kept the actual message/moral of the original. And was about 1000x better than this cash-grabby mess.
@@mikewhitman745 Nope. They are that children need to be aware that things which are too good to be true are probably a scam and if they’re not careful then bad things can happen (not turned into a donkey are anything like that), always be accountable for your actions and don’t let temptation guide you.
Except that was good because it was a unique adaptation of the original novel, rather than a derivative of the Disney adaptation of the novel. And it wasn't Disney.
“The movie ends with a bug being like ‘Who knows what happened, I don’t know what happened.’” Producer Guy really shines in this episode. That was nice to see. Thank you Ryan
LoL... yeah they alternate. In one episode ScreenwriterGuy will be the voice of reason and in another episode ProducerGuy will be the voice of reason while the other wants to fuse absurd ideas into the movie or tv show.
4:04 - This is the biggest issue with this remake. They changed events related to the story in ways that ruin the overall message. Pinocchio in the original film is convinced to join the puppet show instead of going to school. This is why he faces the consequences of his actions. In this movie he actually makes it to school, defeating the purpose of the life lesson. When Pinocchio goes to Pleasure Island he indulges in smoking and even implies he was breaking things with an axe. He's then transformed into a donkey which was a metaphor for saying he was being a jackass. In contrast in this movie he refused to break anything, there weren't any cigars, and kids drinking root beer is hardly a problem. Once again this movie missed the true purpose of why the scene worked in the original. Being turned into a half donkey in this movie isn't justified. The whole point of the original film is that Pinocchio doesn't know right from wrong and he's easily lead astray. And when he makes the wrong choices there are consequences for his actions. These experiences are meant to build his character into an individual that learned from his mistakes and eventually chooses to do the right thing. But in this movie he's already trying to do the right thing all along. Sure, he's easily convinced to do the wrong thing a few times almost choosing not to go to school, but Jiminy catches up with him convincing Pinocchio to go to school before he could complete his bad decision. Then there's the time where he selflessly put Geppetto before the puppet show and his donkey ears and tail vanish. The problem with this scene is it has no meaning because he never really tried to do anything wrong in the first place. When the plot is about learning from your mistakes and then the movie doesn't allow you to make them in the first place, you have failed to make a faithful adaptation.
Agree on all points! Not sure if this was explained in the movie but in the book, the coach driver's business was effectively running a donkey mill based on the story logic that when people act like asses long enough, they become them and he could sell the donkeys or work them to death. Also, in the book the cricket gets smashed by Pinocchio with a hammer in a rage on their second meeting IIRC, after that he shows up periodically to chide Pinocchio as a cricket-ghost. So in the book, Pinocchio starts out as a violent psychopath rather than innocently clueless, attempting to injure Geppetto while he was still just a piece of wood. Even the original Disney movie mellowed the story quite a bit. Pinocchio is one of my favorite fiction stories, I could blab about it all day. Didn't mean for this reply to be so long.
In theory, this should've been good. Zemekis and Hanks collab on an adaptation which they need to add a lot to has worked out great before, Polar Express is one of my favourite adaptations. Unfortunately, Disney+ era Disney had to be involved. And for a story like this to be told right with the modern rating system it needs to be rated R, given some of the stuff in the source material (even modern PG-13 is too restrictive for this story). But of course, that would scare away Disney's core audiance. Moral of the story, if you want to make a family movie with Zemekis and Hanks, use source material that can make a G rated movie.
Fun fact! In the original movie, Monstro has the belly pleats of a blue whale and the fangs of a sperm whale, indicating he's a hybrid cross of the biggest and meanest whales alive which is why Jiminey Cricket says Monstro is "A whale of a whale!"
That's actually gonna make me smile every time I watch that scene from now on 😄 I always loved how Jimminy said it, so now it has a whole strong umph! behind those words, if you get what I'm saying
Ok, saw the original cartoon back in the 80's and I distinctly remember Pinnocchio turning into a donkey. 🐴 It was one of the horrifying memories I had of this cartoon as a child. 😳 Old school Disney movies were mad creepy. 😖
@@AegixDrakan I mean it's so not like the original that it ends up conveying the message that lying is useful and the puppet is already a good boy soooooo
“Do you think we might be missing the entire point of the original?” “I don't care 😁” That killed me! Thank you for being someone who understands the monstrosity that is the Disney remakes.
I have been warning people about them for 20 years saying you will only enable more of them by supporting them. They didn’t listen, and look where we are now.
"So, obviously this puppet spends like a good 90 seconds staring at a big pile of crap on the road and sniffing it and stuff." "I like and approve that idea so much I'm gonna pay real money to somebody who's probably passionate about cinema and art to animate that for us." "Thank you." This is pure gold.
I wanted to know how bad this remake was without having watch it. This looks like it sums it up. I laughed at Pinocchio pushing the boat like he's Dash from The Incredibles. And it felt like Disney also completely gave up on this remake when they don't show if Pinocchio becomes real at the end 😂
I'd love to see Ryan's complete list he worked up, but here's the Best Pinocchio Names we got! *_Pineapple Chai_* *_Pickle Chia-pet_* *_Pink Coolio_* *_Pinot Grigio_* *_Peanut Child_* *_P'Knock-Knock Who's-There_*
Ryan having to watch all these movies so we wouldn't was super hard, barely a convenience for him. And the "Pineapple Chai" had me dying lmao. Thank you.
That's the new entertainment these days; Disney / Marvel / whatever belches out an overpriced project that was made with WAYYYY too many people making decisions over it and with inexperienced woke writers etc etc etc. Very few people will watch it, but oh boy: watching the reviews is TIGHT!
Imagine how topical it would have been if instead of being locked in a cage Pinot Grigio had been tricked by the fox in going to pleasure island, but it was pleasure island for adults, and Tom Hanks I mean Gepetto was already there, y'know, pleasuring himself. And they all escaped by lying their asses off, with no consequences, the end.
For people saying that the kids aren't misbehaving by shoplifting and breaking clocks because there is a place made specifically for shoplifting and breaking clocks is part of the game, therefore the kids are being punished for essentially having fun/being kids. The message is NOT that eating candy, drinking root beer, going to amusement park rides and doing fun things which are part of the game is bad. Pleasure Island's message is that kids need to be aware that things which are too good to be true are a scam/probably false and if they're gullible enough will believe to be real. If they're not careful bad things can happen -- not turn into a donkey or anything like that, but still bad things can happen or it's not what they thought it was. The kids only learned about it either from flyers or from a COMPLETE STRANGER, not from anybody they know who has actually been there and experienced it. If Pleasure Island is such a wonderful place for kids to go to and so close to home then why haven’t these kids heard of it before? Parents would see an exotic Disneyland or Disneyworld like place (essentially in their own backyard which they probably never heard of before) with no rules or adults where kids can have all the candy and root beer they want, and has places where shoplifting, stealing things from each other, vandalizing schools, breaking clocks, insulting each other, and play with firecrackers is legal and can do it at will is very fishy, but the kids won't think this is fishy and if they don't suspect anything fishy bad things can happen to them. Even in the original, Jiminy finds the place to be phony and wants to get Pinocchio off the island. The saying "stupid little boys" doesn't necessarily mean they're misbehaving little boys, but they're very Very Gullible. In real life there have been children or people in their late teens-early 20s have been lured to someone or into their house for reasons which are not wrong, they are duped and killed. One example being John Wayne Gacy. Don't talk to, go anywhere with, or take anything from a stranger. As for why Pinocchio doesn't become real on Pleasure Island, it's because he's still in some ways misguided by temptation and only after he declines to go with Fabiana and Sabina as part of their show in order to find his father do his donkey ears and tail disappear. When he finds his father and they get eaten by Monstro, Pinocchio devises a plan to get out and afterwards he pretty much becomes real as he's proven himself to be brave, truthful and unselfish.
You know, Pepperoni was never my favorite Disney movie as a kid. So many whacked out things happened and it freaked me out (especially the donkey bit). But ya know what? "Doing bad things is BAD" and "Lying is BAD" managed to stick with me. They really did Piccolo dirty with this one.
Yeah. For me it’s a tale of learning to think about the consequences of your actions…aka listen to your parents and conscience. Don’t lie, don’t talk to strangers, don’t skip school and to chase easy money/fame.
Even as a kid, I always thought it was so weird that the kids in Pinocchio were essentially portrayed as evil (or at least bad enough to justify being turned into donkeys) when all they did was smoke and play pool. The fact in this one, all they did was drink soda and smash things they were told were okay to smash is just hilarious.
Well that were the signs of "misbehaving" back then. The fairytale and so the orinigal cartoon has a pretty straightforward "behave yourself or else" message. Like actually the most fairytales
@@SuperCosty2010 Actually, most fairytales had no moral messages until Perrault or the Victorians reworked them. Btw, if you don't want your childhood ruined, stop reading here. 1) The male lead in Snow White fell in love with her corpse and wanted to keep it. In some versions, he had "marital relations" with it. 2) The male lead in Sleeping Beauty was married and impregnated the heroine in her coma. 3) There are lots of variants where Cinderella escapes her incestous father and is physically and $**ually abused by the male lead before they marry. 4) In one of the earliest versions of Cinderella, she had two stepmothers, but she killed the first one!
@@CrewmateWeiWuxian-t8d Also, I believe in many older versions of Beauty and the Beast, the father sells his daughter to the beast and she just has to accept her fate.
well they were drinking beer in the book and original movie and they were vandlizing prior to going to pleasure island, disney didnt shy away from dark elements as people assumed...they did show malificent kill one of her minions in snow white
I didn't even know this was coming out. That shows how relevant Disney has become. I rmember when each Disney release was anticipated more than Christmas.
@@GenerationX1984 Ahh.. the Disney Vault..... Lucky I got all the Blue Rays before they changed everything. Not looking for to the re-dubs, edited, or 'new scenes added', or 'digitally remastered' versions. Still have the original Letter-box Star Wars Trilogy (where Han shot first).
You just brought back all of those memories I had as a kid when I would anxiously await the original Beauty and the Beast, Aladin, Lion King and Mulan and watch all the promotional behind the scenes specials they would air before the movies came out. It feels kind of sad that that feeling of excitement and wonder is gone.
Tom Hanks is in the movie because of his previous experience in the Polar Express. Both are directed by Robert Zemeckis. The Pinocchio reboot is essentially The Polar Express 2: Electric Boogaloo.
@Sermon Institute For Success I honestly believe he's one of the funniest people on the Internet right now. He packs so much humor into so short a skit that it's almost unreal. And he does it every time!!
I'm Italian and I'd like to spend a word on the original book's Coachman, who HAD to bring the kids to the Land of Toys in order to transform them. That's because it wasn't the Coachman with some magical power to make donkeys out of kids, it was the kids THEMSELVES turning into donkeys by committing acts of stupidity for several months. But of course, what was perfectly logic in the original book, in this movie had to be unclear
Producer Guy genuinely knowing *WAY* more about Pinocchio than Screenwriter Guy does was a nice twist.
whats funny is if you really think about it; Pinocchio might be the ONLY movie this producer HAS SEEN! lmao! are there other movies the Producer Ryan references as if he's actually seen it?? is Stromboli, Producer Ryans favorite character?? lmao!
Producer guy was there when the original was made n he got a lot of money from it so, he's gotta remember
Screen writer guy is a hack writer with no time for research before doing a CGI remake
Producer guy has also seen all the Toby Maguire and Andrew Garfield Spider-Man movies... but only because Screenwriter guy told him to
producers knowing much about projects is tight
That seems like it’s the thing here lately, Producer guy asks pointed questions and subtly calls shit out hahaha
"Do you think we might be missing the point of the original movie?"
You just summed up the entirety of all Disney remakes.
Disney and the European folklore the stories are based on is culturally alien to the tribe that currently owns Disney
some of them
@@priscillajimenez27 most of them
@@priscillajimenez27 all of them
What is the point of the original because that one also had no point.
Gotta love how Ryan didn't even mention Pinocchio's love interest, she has _so much_ impact to the story that the movie doesn't change anything if you erase her scenes
Could've been interesting if it led anywhere.
But the movie just stopped before finishing up.
there was a love interest in the new one ?
... oh I forgot. It's 2022 ... there's got to be a love interest for the main character even if it makes zero sense at all. :D
There's a love interest in the movie?
lmao i ain't even seen the movie, so i didn't even know there was one, and it changed absolutely nothing XD
We all know why she was in there
The original Pinocchio contained roughly 14,000 metaphors about maturity, responsibility and the human condition. Somehow, the AI that wrote Pinocchio 2022 managed to avoid recognizing a single one of them. It's almost impressive, like dodging raindrops in a storm.
Somehow less impressive when accounting for quantum mechanics.
BWUAHAHAHA I laughed
That's because the AI that wrote 2022's Pinochetio was given the instruction to rewrite Pinocchio so the main character is perfect, doesn't have to learn anything, and is only a victim of circumstance, under the belief it would appeal to the college aged, infant minded, technicolor-haired, left of Karl Marx, social justice lynch mobsters who think they're perfect, don't have to learn anything, and are only victims of circumstance; just like all the other "cUrReNt yEaR" pig slop about strongk, empowahed MaRey SuuUuuues who are perfect, don't have to learn anything, and are only victims of circumstance.
Odd that the Soulless Disney Corporation would try to remake their classic animated films to cater to those people, since Walt Disney built an empire by making art for adults and children alike, who could grow up and pass those stories onto their children, but SJLMs don't have kids, because they aborted all of them.
Amazingly enough, you could probably make an actual AI write a Pinocchio movie and it would be more poignant than Pinocchio 2022
Not disney, but was the 05 Wonka remake devoid of lessons? Or nearly? I feel I recall the glorious points made by the oompahhs were absent.
The line about the poor animator who had to do the pile of crap scene was funny yet heartbreaking lol.
Pinochle Yo-yo dropped his real apple in road apples there.
"I worked on Pinocchio (2022)"
"Oh really? What did you do?"
"I drew a stinking pile of shit"
"... So, you drew the whole movie?"
Dude had to get reference photos of actual piles of crap😂
@@kilmone best comment on here
"Hey sir, we've made a rough draft of the men drinking and smoking at-"
"NO ALCOHOL NOR CIGARS!"
"Uh- ok I guess, but in the original it-"
"...animate this poop."
"What? What are you calling poop?"
"No I mean we've got a scene where he sniffs some poop. Please animate it."
"(screaming internally) oh, ok..."
“Do you think we may be missing the entire point of the original movie?”
“I don’t care”
I am 100% certain this was an actual conversation with Disney Executives
I doubt it, because that would require one of them to realize that they're missing the point of the original.
Not only Disney, but all of Hollywood...
Its not just a script Ryan wrote, its a transcript if the actual conversation
Then, naturally, someone tells someone else to get all the way off their back.
Pink Coolio is tight!
The fact that Pinot Grigio never has to learn the main lesson of the story, and in fact, is shown to get ahead in life by lying, is hilarious and sad.
I think this version is actually better, teaching kids the real-world lesson, lying is actually helpful in this world or something
The kind of people who get paid to do their jobs horribly never had to learn a lesson in their life.
Very, very sad
I've heard of pandering to politicians, but this is ridiculous...
Uhm, his name is Pinot Noir, thank you very much
You have to give Disney one: every time you think they simply can not come up with a even worse live adaptation then the last one, they take up the challenge and prove you wrong...
They need to just leave it alone …here’s an idea have a new idea…
@@priscillanotpresley new ideas are risky ... can't afford risks when there's money that needs printing.
(applies to the entire entertainment industry since the dawn of time ... )
Also keep in mind that Pinochio's story (and pretty much all of the original classics were public domain ... so no licensing and a free script.
@@NotTheStinkyCheese That's why King Walt chose those stories. No royalties. Then chose to copyright his version of them.
@@mkvv5687 that's a very smart move he did
@@priscillanotpresleyexcept their new ideas suck, too. Wish sucks. Turning Red sucks. Strange World sucks. Elemental sucks.
At this point Disney is looking for water to stop their cash from burning, and they keep finding oil.
Ryan puts more effort in a 6 min sketch than Disney does in multi-million dollar movies
Sketch**🤓
Six minute scratches are TIGHT.
I wouldn't say "more effort". I mean, maybe for the script writer and stuff but those CGI artists, they are probably being overworked to shite.
Without Hollywood's lackluster effort there would be no Ryan. It's a symbotic relationship at it's peak.
Agreed XD
Pinachiao 0:11
Pena P Pinaga Pineakaio 0:12
Pineapple Chai 1:07
Pickle Chia Pet 2:45
Pink Coolio 3:18
Pinot Grigio 4:02
Peanut Child 4:43
Pknock Knock Who's There 5:01
Thank you! I'm dying!
that was too damn funny!! gotta watch a few more times
Thank you so much. It was going by so fast I missed most of these.
Pink Coolio was my favorite.
Doing the Lord's work here
Watching the pitch meeting for a movie so you don't actually have to watch the movie is tight.
I vowed never to watch another live action Disney remake after...I don't actually remember, something in the 2010's...so these Pitch Meetings are wonderfully cathartic in that they affirm my decision.
@@PhelesDragon Same. I watched Cinderella, Jungle Book, and Beauty and the Beast. Three strikes n you're out.
@@PhelesDragon So you’ve never seen the live action The Jungle Book? That movie’s incredible, one of the only good live action remakes.
Yup yup yup........yup
Oh really?
Best thing about watching this channel is when I’m watching on my iPad, my wife can’t see what I’m watching, and when she sees me cracking up, she says, “You’re watching Pitch Meetings, aren’t you?”
_"I don't care"_ literally made me laugh out loud. Nice twist on the catchphrase, and the sentiment broadly applies to all of Disney's live-action remakes.
I need a pineapple chai to calm down.🤣
And the industry in general.
Ok
101 Dalmations was okay.
The original stories were a million times better than any of the Disney versions.
I remember the scene in the original movie where the kid turns into a Donkey and calls out to his mom in fear of his own life before completely losing the ability to speak and starts going crazy in front of Pinocchio. That scene scared the crap out of me as a kid. Imagine what this scene could've looked like in a modern live action adaptation if properly done right, I was really looking forward to being scared again as an adult.
I can't believe Disney thought that is too inappropriate. It's supposed to be scary, like if you do bad things, binge drink, smoke, destroy people's property, consequences (possibly dire ones) will follow. You make a jackass out of yourself by doing these things and any kid can pick that up.
I don't know if there is an english dub but i suggest you the last italian adaptation (2019), Garrone's "Pinocchio". It's more close to the original novel rather than the disney cartoon. The scene of donkey trasformation is kinda scary XD
Yikes. It sounds horribly scary, but at the same time it's sort of classic Grimm's fairy tale territory; those guys didn't mince around with the personal responsibility.
Now I actually _want_ to see the original animated movie. Admittedly, in the CGI version I think I'd want to see it toned down a bit. Scaring is okay, scarring not so much.
😂 bro why?
Maybe Guillermo del Toro can do a better job with his version
"What really spoke to me about this one is we haven't done it yet"
You can't convince me that that isn't how the actual pitch for this movie went.
No, it was probably something more like *_”Goddamnit,_* we need to _show up_ Del Toro!”
Every Pitch Meeting is tight. But somehow this one was a true gem, I was laughing far more than usual. Maybe it was the brilliant variety of vaguely almost-Pinnochio-ish names. Or the beautiful evolution of "I DON'T know!" into the more honest "I DON'T care!"
When we get a better morality tale from the Pitch Meeting than the actual Pinocchio movie
Fucking true.
Yeah. I felt the message from the original movie was that the world is scary and you can't trust anyone and you'll be punished for doing things you didn't understand.
The Remake. Not the original.
@@ModernVintageTV0 Was he (or she) really in need of clarification on that point? (serious question)
ehh not the worst
This is probably the most brutal pitch meeting I’ve ever seen and I loved every second of it
Have you watched the Catwoman one? I nearly died XD Everything is wrong with that movie.
He also went pretty hard in his Lightyear pitch meeting
Because it said what we're all thinking. It's different from the original, in all the wrong ways. -_-
The one for the movie "Old". That one is pure carnage from the get-go.
I'm still flabbergasted that they didn't know what the original movie was even about. How is that at all possible? And it's not a very obscure movie - you can even watch it today, and ask people about it.
I think Gepetto sending Pinocchio off by himself explains why he lost the first kid.
My thought exactly 😂 I was really expecting Ryan to say that
Exactly!
Especially in a world that has giant anthropomorphic cats and foxes that walk around town preying on children.
The movie is based on an Italian prop, man.
People don't die walking to school.
All jokes aside in Italy (as many countries in the world) even just 50 years ago was normal for kids to walk by themselves everywhere as part of groups generally. My mom for exalmpe used to go to elementary school alone in the south of Italy. Things changed around the 80s I guess, for some reasons.
0:19 “so what really spoke to me about this one is that we haven’t done it yet” that was gold🤣🤣
Constantly mispronouncing Pinocchio was absolutely hilarious barely an inconvenience
And barely an inconvenience.
Pina colada!
Pink Coolio
He never mispronounced pinot grigio
Pickle Child is a classic
The “paying real money to someone who’s passionate about cinema and art” is just so freaking spot on
Imagine being passionate about cinema and animation, working literal blood, sweat, and tears to get a chance to work for perhaps the biggest name in that specific area, only to have your first day animating a “live action” Pinocchio going out in the new unexplored world and one of his first acts is sniffing the excrement of some unidentified animal on the street. Yeah, I doubt the irony is lost in the producers, but you know, money.
They can in all honesty say at their next job interview when asked what they did when working for Disney: "a literal pile of crap"
Who?
Like being an animator at Rockstar and being assigned to giving the horses physicsed testicles
I freaking JUST wrote a comment about the brilliance of that.
"I don't know" and "I don't care" pretty much sum up what this remake is made of. Great video as always, Ryan!
If I didn’t know any better, I’d say at least one of them was named Pierre.
Not really. There were things which you can easily miss in this remake if you’re too cynical.
The "as it should" line got me SO GOOD
“What really spoke to me about this one… is that we haven’t done it yet”
and the mispronouncing of Pinocchio was peak comedy 😂
It’s almost as good as ‘Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarfs ‘ creating 3 dwarfs named: Pino, Nocchi, and Chio who work together to operate a wooden puppet…
Is pronouncing Pinocchio is tight
The look of calculated menace in his face as he says 'as it should' is breathtaking
I know, right?
When he says this, look at his eyebrows. Pure evil
tbh, Hollywood probably has a real pleasure island or two, and we definitely should be disturbed by what probably happens there
@@AeneasGemini clearly a reference to Epstein's island where also Tom Hanks was supposedly chillin' :)
@@Ko_onstantin Having children bring you drinks they aren't old enough to mix or drink themselves is TIGHT!
@@AeneasGemini I highly doubt that Epstein was the only one of his kind.
Thanks to pitch meetings, I looks forward to Disney's live action soulless remakes.
I avoid them like the plague, then come to watch the pitch meetings to know what I missed. So far I haven't regreted not watching any of them.
@Doctah Wahwee we basically re-entered the Disney era of Cinderella 3 cash grabs, but with higher budgets and accusations of racism to avoid how shitty they are
Do they have a soul, or are they lifeless duds? We would never know...if not for Pitch Meeting -Worthless Cricket
but the seamless mixing of cgi with real-life actors is flawless - said no one ever ...
I immediately thought about a life action remake of Soul.
I always thought it was funny how Jiminy Cricket, who really does look like a grasshopper, was offended when Lampwick asked, "Who's the grasshopper?" in the animated classic. But right now, I just did an image search, and it turns out that there ARE green crickets that look just like Jiminy.
So.......that would be a Cricket Match?
Oh boy. I'm an animator and being an animator was my dream career. I literally put off trying to enter the industry for a couple years because I didn't wanna be stuck dedicating weeks to working on stuff like the crap sniffing scene. Thank you for mentioning stuff like this. Means a lot.
Good for you. One should not have to do things in their dream career that do not align with their dreams, wants and desires. Otherwise what is the point of a dream career? It may as well be a fantasy.
I also wouldn't want to animate that pile of crap
and also the feces.
@Caroline LA Exactly. I can't imagine glorifying boycotting your own dreams because of the prospect of it becoming work. They may well be a bot tho. Same as me.
@Caroline LA Eh, don't get me wrong. I took the job in the end, and I'm happier for it, but I think there's something to be said about loving an artform, but hating the artlessness that it turns into. Imagine you had ideas and worked hard to become a skilled painter, only to spend weeks painting a pile of shit, and having the client send it back with notes like asking you to try another shade of brown. And you may not realize this, but there's a surprising amount of stuff like that in movies. I'd heard a teacher describe the medium as 'polishing turds, all day.' When you're young and passionate and maybe a little prideful, that's enough to make you think twice. Lol in the end I thought to myself that if I had any pride as an animator, I'd give them the best pile of shit they'd ever seen in their life.
If you ever get tired of working for a big company, I'm a writer. lol
At the end I heard myself asking: "How did they mess up Pinocchio?" That perfectly summurises Disney in the moment.
That is a great question. How do you screw up Pinocchio? Disney must have heard that question and thought it was a request.
I'm old this was one of the first movies I ever saw as a kid . The whole point of the movie was Lying and doing Wrong had consequences . They should have left well enough alone
It's what happens when your company is being run by people hired strictly on their skin color, who they sleep with, and who they voted for. NOT for any TALENT.
Gosh, this checklist of what is and isn't advisable for a safe, mainstream, four-quadrant movie is suffocatory. Personally, I think increased representation is good, but Pinocchio needing to be faultless and the kids not really being allowed to misbehave removes Pinocchio's character arc and robs the story of a narrative point of view or purpose.
@@pretikewl76 💯💯💯. It’s quantity over quality
This 6 minutes of sketch had more creativity than the entire Pinocchio movie.
Pretty much lol
@JZ's BFF it can be quite a bit in the long term but rarely will it generate immediate large profit
This movie's name is Pinochetio.
Is that why the stock lost 2/5 of its value this year?
Pretty much than the entire Disney corporation for the last several years.
At this point…these pitch meetings are way better than the movies in 6 minutes or less…
I deeply want to see a movie this guy writes.
I wanna see him and CinemaSins attempt one each. CinemaSins used to be slightly entertaining but the guy quickly became a douchebag. The videos also never really challenged the nonsense of movies, and were instead full of bad jokes that contradicted each other. His movie would probably be terrible but he would try to play it off as intentional. Then he would make a video picking it apart. Meanwhile, Ryan George would put out something real classy and coherent, tight and barely an inconvenience.
"AS IT SHOULD" I love the aggressiveness behind that line.
So …they basically got rid of alll the conflict?
Ah yes. Great storytelling. Very exciting when a character doesn’t have to face…. Any challenges, or learn any lessons.
Modern Hollywood, everyone is just awesome all the time 🤷🏾
he learned that lying helps get him out of tough situations sometimes. so thats good.
He is chased by a sea monster and solves it with super powers. That's a _kind_ of challenge.
Lesson is : Never skip leg day, to keep sea monsters at bay.
So Gepetto got down with... Sonic the Hedgehog to make Pinocchio that fast then?
My friend and I watched this a couple of nights ago, so naturally she and I were confused about the "creative" decisions this movie made. Thankfully, all of our questions are answered here, and they all seem to have the same answer... "Money!" Thankyou guys for clearing things up! Much love!
You watched the entire thing? Props to you, I've given up after the fox scene
Ironically, the worse the adaptation the less money they typically make but that doesn't seem to stop the motivation.
@@MrBrock314 Yes, this genuinely confuses me. Disney keeps shilling out these live action remakes and they are all just bad. Like, not just mediocre, but insulting to the original level bad, as if it was intentional. And I just don't get it, why do they keep making these?
@@olenickel6013 money laundering?
@@HABO2210 Pretty sure disney already pays no taxes as it is.
My favorite part of this pitch meeting is the many ways he pronounces Pinnochio
"I think we might be missing the entire point of the original"
"I dont care"
-Disney
"Do you think we might be missing the entire point of the original?"
"I don't care!!"
Seems pretty accurate 😂 didn't even realize this movie came out yet, but gotta love watching the pitch meeting instead of suffering through the actual movie!
Cinemasins did a review of the original recently but I also didn't realise it was because a remake had been done until I saw this Pitch Meeting.
@@rickstaism I think I only ever halfway watched the trailer for the remake, and turned it off after Pinocchio said something like "no DADDY!"
@@codysnowden231 Who's Pinocchio? Oh you mean Pina Colada.
I no longer mind these screwups anymore since I can watch a pitch meeting about it afterwards.
It's great to see how passionate the Screenwriter Guy is about Peenuochccio and how much he cares about writing him in the spirit of the original.
My current theory is that Disney is actually paid off by Ryan to make bad movies so that he in turn can make great pitch meetings
Disney is paid by the Chinese Communist Party to subvert Western civilization.
one can hope
"Get those dead relatives in there. Start this off like every other Disney movie."
The magic of Disney.
Johnny’s mother, father, and grandmother were still alive in *Song of the South.*
The look on his face when he says "as it should" is priceless 😂😂😂
Weinstein somewhere loling
I was LMAO!!! 😂🤣😂🤣🤣
When sht gets REAL!
I think he was making an impression of the coachman. You know what I am talking about. >:)
@@stefanogiannaccini3258 oh that scene. Modern kids weren’t ready for that I guess.
*Everyone:* Hey Disney you know the point of the beer and smoking and the lying is that they're bad right?
*Disney:* Yep
*Everyone:* And you know you can show these things in a movie geared towards children as long as there's a lesson behind why they're bad right?
*Disney:* Yup.
*Everyone:* So, if you show Pinoke drinking, smoking, lying and making the point that it's BAD to do those things, then there's no need to change those things right?
*Disney:* That makes sense to me.
*Everyone:* SO WHY DID YOU CHANGE THE BEER TO ROOT BEER, REMOVE THE SMOKING, AND HAVE PINOCCHIO ESCAPE BY LYING?! IT UNDERCUTS THE ENTIRE MESSAGE.
*Disney:* gonna need you to hop all the way off my back about this.
It's part of subverting the ideology of a nation that you can't compete with militarily
I like the added touch of being patient until the very last Everyone moment lol
No lesson learned here.
To be fair, Disney probably would've faced child endangerment laws if they ordered actual kids to drink and smoke for a movie. In animation, you have a lot more freedom to make characters do what you want. Still doesn't justify this soulless remake when there's an upcoming Del Toro adaptation that'll be much more entertaining.
While I don’t like to take example a reflect it on to a whole group, this is something that is wrong in children’s movies, specifically those that are suppose to teach a lesson.
They want to teach a lesson about something wrong/bad but aren’t allowed to show the bad thing undercutting any strength the message had.
The beloved tale of Pineapple Chai.
Loved by a latte people.
I actually popped the dvd of the original cartoon in for some younger relatives and had to fast forward some of the scenes because they were frankly insane.
Especially pleasure island!
Maybe it was the animation that was so freaky.
Not knowing a movie exists but still being hyped about the pitch meeting is tight
"Oh, going to pleasure island is TIGHT!"
"Uhh, somehow it makes me uncomfortable when you say that, sir."
*"As it SHOULD."*
That part was hilarious!
honestly, it made me think about how Hollywood likely has a real pleasure island or two....and we should most definitely be uncomfortable about what happens there
@@AeneasGemini considering rumors about Tom Hanks, this is even worse
@@AeneasGemini Ever heard about "Epstein" and his islands?
@@AeneasGemini I mean, practically half of Hollywood is on Jeffery Epstein’s flight log to his “Pleasure Island”. Including Tom Hanks.
ProducerGuy looked more like 1940's Coachman in that joke than the coachman in the 2022 version lmao
The funniest thing about this remake is I didn’t even know it existed until reviews of it started popping
I didn’t know about it until I clicked this video and wrote this comment.
@@demonzabrak I still don't know about it
@@Naija_Ninja there’s a Pinocchio movie?
Same.
@@RazorO2Productions whos pinocchio?
Anybody remember they already did a live-action Pinocchio in 1996 with Jonathan Taylor Thomas from Tim Allen’s Home Improvement? THAT was a fantastic, excellently-done film that absolutely honored and kept the actual message/moral of the original. And was about 1000x better than this cash-grabby mess.
There are some morals in this version too that you easily miss because you’re too cynical 😉
@EpicJoshua314 like lying will get you out of trouble?
@@mikewhitman745 Nope. They are that children need to be aware that things which are too good to be true are probably a scam and if they’re not careful then bad things can happen (not turned into a donkey are anything like that), always be accountable for your actions and don’t let temptation guide you.
Except that was good because it was a unique adaptation of the original novel, rather than a derivative of the Disney adaptation of the novel.
And it wasn't Disney.
If I had a nickel for every time Ryan alluded to him not wearing pants when recording Pich Meetings, I'd have nearly 50 cents.
"Which isn't a lot, really, but it's weird that it happens so often."
Another pitch meeting, another two hours of my life saved. Thank you Ryan! 😄
This channel has saved me SO MUCH TIME!
@@MichaelWyattMDW me too.
I don't do anything productive with it, but it is time saved.
@@misterchubbikins oh newfound time that has been saved but also simultaneously wasted is TIGHT
@@misterchubbikins very true
In a weird way, this channel proves every one of these movies is worth their weight in gold. Without bad movies, this channel wouldn't be what it is.
“They get turned into donkeys and sold as slaves to the salt mines” will forever be my favorite quote ever.
SoO qUirky
Watching a "Pitch Meeting" video so many times that you have memorized the entire script is super easy, and absolutely not an inconvenience.
I've been watching some of the older pitch meetings, and it's good to see that these guys have really developed some chemistry since the early days.
It was bound to happen. They have so much in common!
@@mr.battle20 Yet, each a unique individual in their own way.
I always asked myself if they were related and in a relationship. Where's their colleague this lawyer or producer?
“The movie ends with a bug being like ‘Who knows what happened, I don’t know what happened.’”
Producer Guy really shines in this episode. That was nice to see. Thank you Ryan
LoL... yeah they alternate. In one episode ScreenwriterGuy will be the voice of reason and in another episode ProducerGuy will be the voice of reason while the other wants to fuse absurd ideas into the movie or tv show.
Jiminy Cricket is the voice of the remade-version's writer.
Bugs that don't know what happened are TIGHT!!
“I like and approve that idea so much I’m going to pay a real person money to animate that scene” is so brutal lmaoo
His name is a minced oath for Jesus Christ and they can’t deal with that anymore. He used to be a very prominent character outside of *Pinocchio.*
4:04 - This is the biggest issue with this remake. They changed events related to the story in ways that ruin the overall message. Pinocchio in the original film is convinced to join the puppet show instead of going to school. This is why he faces the consequences of his actions. In this movie he actually makes it to school, defeating the purpose of the life lesson. When Pinocchio goes to Pleasure Island he indulges in smoking and even implies he was breaking things with an axe. He's then transformed into a donkey which was a metaphor for saying he was being a jackass. In contrast in this movie he refused to break anything, there weren't any cigars, and kids drinking root beer is hardly a problem. Once again this movie missed the true purpose of why the scene worked in the original. Being turned into a half donkey in this movie isn't justified.
The whole point of the original film is that Pinocchio doesn't know right from wrong and he's easily lead astray. And when he makes the wrong choices there are consequences for his actions. These experiences are meant to build his character into an individual that learned from his mistakes and eventually chooses to do the right thing. But in this movie he's already trying to do the right thing all along. Sure, he's easily convinced to do the wrong thing a few times almost choosing not to go to school, but Jiminy catches up with him convincing Pinocchio to go to school before he could complete his bad decision. Then there's the time where he selflessly put Geppetto before the puppet show and his donkey ears and tail vanish. The problem with this scene is it has no meaning because he never really tried to do anything wrong in the first place. When the plot is about learning from your mistakes and then the movie doesn't allow you to make them in the first place, you have failed to make a faithful adaptation.
Agree on all points! Not sure if this was explained in the movie but in the book, the coach driver's business was effectively running a donkey mill based on the story logic that when people act like asses long enough, they become them and he could sell the donkeys or work them to death.
Also, in the book the cricket gets smashed by Pinocchio with a hammer in a rage on their second meeting IIRC, after that he shows up periodically to chide Pinocchio as a cricket-ghost.
So in the book, Pinocchio starts out as a violent psychopath rather than innocently clueless, attempting to injure Geppetto while he was still just a piece of wood. Even the original Disney movie mellowed the story quite a bit.
Pinocchio is one of my favorite fiction stories, I could blab about it all day. Didn't mean for this reply to be so long.
I was about to google what the heck Pistachio was supposed to be about, but you all summed it up here already!
Can't have actual morality coming from the place that nonstop tells us we're the center of the universe and Make Our Own Destiny(tm), can we?
2:13, to be fair that was also a legitimate critique of the Disney cartoon
I’m loving how Pinocchio’s name was something different every time Ryan said it. 😂
My fave was pineapple chai and pine-a-chio 😂
My fav was Pink Coolio haha
@@cassymarlow6111 also peanut child 😂
i died when he called him pinot grigio
I loved Pin-knock-knock-who's-there!! 🤣🤣🤣
Love the way he constantly got Pinocchio's name wrong, but the best part was pleasure Island being "tight". That bit made me wheeze.
Pleasure Island is indeed tight, especially if you enter through the back.
@@madiqismal4186 wow wow wow... Wow.
The look on Producer Guy's face when he said "AS IT SHOULD" was something that I've never before seen in a pitch meeting, LOL
The guy who owns Pleasure Island did not kill himself
@@NeoTechni exactly!
Despite this being "live action", it still feels more cartoonish than the original.
In theory, this should've been good. Zemekis and Hanks collab on an adaptation which they need to add a lot to has worked out great before, Polar Express is one of my favourite adaptations. Unfortunately, Disney+ era Disney had to be involved. And for a story like this to be told right with the modern rating system it needs to be rated R, given some of the stuff in the source material (even modern PG-13 is too restrictive for this story). But of course, that would scare away Disney's core audiance. Moral of the story, if you want to make a family movie with Zemekis and Hanks, use source material that can make a G rated movie.
"oh hell yeah get those dead relatives in here start this off like every other Disney movie" 😂 I love it
Yep, there must be a mandatory requirement for at least one dead parent per movie.
@@trinaq especially if your a mother 😂 RIP
You can't have conflict if it is a loving, traditional, wonderfully married family. DESTROY THE FAMILY! -Disney
Yep like most batman movies.
"Should we put any non-white characters into this thing?" "What about adding a wise magical Black person? Has that ever been done?"
Fun fact! In the original movie, Monstro has the belly pleats of a blue whale and the fangs of a sperm whale, indicating he's a hybrid cross of the biggest and meanest whales alive which is why Jiminey Cricket says Monstro is "A whale of a whale!"
Indeed a fun fact
That's actually gonna make me smile every time I watch that scene from now on 😄 I always loved how Jimminy said it, so now it has a whole strong umph! behind those words, if you get what I'm saying
Old Monstro was relentless and terrifying.
In this divided world, it’s nice to see when things like the Pinocchio remake can bring us together in our dislike for something
Ok, saw the original cartoon back in the 80's and I distinctly remember Pinnocchio turning into a donkey. 🐴
It was one of the horrifying memories I had of this cartoon as a child. 😳
Old school Disney movies were mad creepy. 😖
Don't you mean Pa knock knock who's there? Or was it Peanut child or pino grigo?
Monstro scared the hell out of me when I saw it. The "Subnautica sea monster" version in this one is probably less scary.
I laughed
Weird that after 300 episodes they finally did one with no spoilers ahead
This and 299
I mean, it's literally the EXACT same movie as the old one, sooooooo. XD
@@AegixDrakan Except worse and it isn't. If it WAS the exact same, it would've been good.
@@AegixDrakan sounds like they changed a couple important things.
@@AegixDrakan I mean it's so not like the original that it ends up conveying the message that lying is useful and the puppet is already a good boy soooooo
“Do you think we might be missing the entire point of the original?”
“I don't care 😁”
That killed me! Thank you for being someone who understands the monstrosity that is the Disney remakes.
I have been warning people about them for 20 years saying you will only enable more of them by supporting them. They didn’t listen, and look where we are now.
The original movie or the original book?
Cause the original book is... well it's a lot.
Seriously, most spot-on line from this skit and applicable to basically every one of these remakes!
I pray that Disney will go bankrupt. It's helping to destroy Western civilization with its woke nonsense and poor adaptations of classics.
"So, obviously this puppet spends like a good 90 seconds staring at a big pile of crap on the road and sniffing it and stuff."
"I like and approve that idea so much I'm gonna pay real money to somebody who's probably passionate about cinema and art to animate that for us."
"Thank you."
This is pure gold.
a perfect metaphor for how they view the viewer of the film
@@chexfan2000this is ironic because Disney plus censored an episode of Bluey where the horse poops even though yeah they show this .
Damn. I gotta figure out a way to work Pink-coolio into a conversation.
I wanted to know how bad this remake was without having watch it. This looks like it sums it up. I laughed at Pinocchio pushing the boat like he's Dash from The Incredibles. And it felt like Disney also completely gave up on this remake when they don't show if Pinocchio becomes real at the end 😂
When I saw Pinocchio pushing the boat so quickly I thought of the farting in Swiss Army Man
@@3rdalbum I thought of Sonic in Sonic Movie 2 during the fishing scene
I'd love to see Ryan's complete list he worked up, but here's the Best Pinocchio Names we got!
*_Pineapple Chai_*
*_Pickle Chia-pet_*
*_Pink Coolio_*
*_Pinot Grigio_*
*_Peanut Child_*
*_P'Knock-Knock Who's-There_*
Pacino cow
Padoinkadoink
Pachinko dick
Larry
It’s nuts he didn’t say “Pistachio”
@@captaincanaveral i see what you did there 😂
This makes the 90’s live action one with Johnathan Taylor Thomas look like a timeless, Oscar winning masterpiece. (Which we still need a pitch for.)
That one was actually a pretty good adaptation overall.
jesus christ, you weren't makingit up, there really is such a thing!
Is that the one with the Drew Carrey? Or is there another other one?
JTT’s Tom and huck is a treasure
@@johnwilson4982 jtt is a treasure
I kept hearing "glocks" instead of "clocks" and got really excited for this dark, gritty remake.
"So, you have a soulless remake for me?"
"Yes, sir, I do!"
"Do you think we might be missing the point of the original movie?" This is exactly what I thought, totally agree~
Ryan having to watch all these movies so we wouldn't was super hard, barely a convenience for him.
And the "Pineapple Chai" had me dying lmao.
Thank you.
Yes, that was my favourite too. Thanks Ryan for doing the hard work for us
I will never not look at Pinocchio as Pineachello ever again
An instant classic. Always happy to hear 'Heyshutup', and 'I don't care' would be a worthy inclusion in the regular catchphrases.
YASSSS another incredible pitch meeting for a movie I'll never see.
Ryan has saved me from so many crappy movies, It’s a good thing Putin doesn’t run Hollywood or Ryan would go splat
That's the new entertainment these days; Disney / Marvel / whatever belches out an overpriced project that was made with WAYYYY too many people making decisions over it and with inexperienced woke writers etc etc etc. Very few people will watch it, but oh boy: watching the reviews is TIGHT!
@@MarcelNL used "woke" as a criticism, opinion invalid
@@Shizzy5321 Uhm, no?
By far most people hate it. That's why most woke movies and tv-shows flop.
Pinot Grigio was easily the winner of the bunch. I actually laughed out loud.
Excellent but not as good as Pink Coolio!
Pineapple Chai is my absolute favorite.
Pino Grigio has me DEAD. I love you Ryan. Thanks for making this so I can get away with only watching 30 minutes of that movie and never finishing it.
"Going to Pleasure Island is tight!" That escalated quickly! 🤣
Epstein Island bigtime.
@@taags Ah yes, the island of the scumbag who didn’t kill himself.
Imagine how topical it would have been if instead of being locked in a cage Pinot Grigio had been tricked by the fox in going to pleasure island, but it was pleasure island for adults, and Tom Hanks I mean Gepetto was already there, y'know, pleasuring himself. And they all escaped by lying their asses off, with no consequences, the end.
@@creativeconsciousness7392 Hiring Tom Hanks to play a man obsessed with having a little boy is Tight
When producer guy said “As you SHOULD…” omg. I think this is my favorite Pitch Meeting ever just for that line
Can I suggest a mashup of screenwriter guy just saying the names of characters wrong? The Pinocchio names were freaking hysterical
The eyebrows at 3:30 I literally can't. 🤣I just woke my husband up by laughing.
4:27 "They're bad kids because they drank some root beer and destroyed things they were told they could destroy."
xD That's a great way to put it.
How is that misbehavior if they are doing what they are told?
hey don't joke about drinking root beer. all those bubbles are really bad for developing minds.
@@sirGuy1995 Yeah but the kids had no awareness of that
For people saying that the kids aren't misbehaving by shoplifting and breaking clocks because there is a place made specifically for shoplifting and breaking clocks is part of the game, therefore the kids are being punished for essentially having fun/being kids. The message is NOT that eating candy, drinking root beer, going to amusement park rides and doing fun things which are part of the game is bad.
Pleasure Island's message is that kids need to be aware that things which are too good to be true are a scam/probably false and if they're gullible enough will believe to be real. If they're not careful bad things can happen -- not turn into a donkey or anything like that, but still bad things can happen or it's not what they thought it was. The kids only learned about it either from flyers or from a COMPLETE STRANGER, not from anybody they know who has actually been there and experienced it. If Pleasure Island is such a wonderful place for kids to go to and so close to home then why haven’t these kids heard of it before?
Parents would see an exotic Disneyland or Disneyworld like place (essentially in their own backyard which they probably never heard of before) with no rules or adults where kids can have all the candy and root beer they want, and has places where shoplifting, stealing things from each other, vandalizing schools, breaking clocks, insulting each other, and play with firecrackers is legal and can do it at will is very fishy, but the kids won't think this is fishy and if they don't suspect anything fishy bad things can happen to them. Even in the original, Jiminy finds the place to be phony and wants to get Pinocchio off the island.
The saying "stupid little boys" doesn't necessarily mean they're misbehaving little boys, but they're very Very Gullible.
In real life there have been children or people in their late teens-early 20s have been lured to someone or into their house for reasons which are not wrong, they are duped and killed. One example being John Wayne Gacy.
Don't talk to, go anywhere with, or take anything from a stranger.
As for why Pinocchio doesn't become real on Pleasure Island, it's because he's still in some ways misguided by temptation and only after he declines to go with Fabiana and Sabina as part of their show in order to find his father do his donkey ears and tail disappear. When he finds his father and they get eaten by Monstro, Pinocchio devises a plan to get out and afterwards he pretty much becomes real as he's proven himself to be brave, truthful and unselfish.
You know, Pepperoni was never my favorite Disney movie as a kid. So many whacked out things happened and it freaked me out (especially the donkey bit).
But ya know what? "Doing bad things is BAD" and "Lying is BAD" managed to stick with me.
They really did Piccolo dirty with this one.
Yeah. For me it’s a tale of learning to think about the consequences of your actions…aka listen to your parents and conscience. Don’t lie, don’t talk to strangers, don’t skip school and to chase easy money/fame.
pinpineapplepen wasn't that big on me either. back then i didn't like the really old disney movies.
@@theimortal1974 Same, I didn't have the attention span. Fantasia bored me to tears.
I would love to see a pitch meeting for The Fifth Element!
I thought he already did one for that movie. I'll have to check.
@@mehnotreallymyname3888 no but there's an Honest Trailer for it
There would be SO MUCH to say !
Seconded!
@@TheSchaef47 ohhh ok, maybe that's why i got confused.
"Producer Guy paying real money to somebody who's passionate about art and cinema to animate a pile of crap" is such a meta notion.
when ryan's more entertaining than most movies these days.
It's not a when, it's all the time
Even as a kid, I always thought it was so weird that the kids in Pinocchio were essentially portrayed as evil (or at least bad enough to justify being turned into donkeys) when all they did was smoke and play pool. The fact in this one, all they did was drink soda and smash things they were told were okay to smash is just hilarious.
The original was basically *Problem Child* with a puppet.
Well that were the signs of "misbehaving" back then. The fairytale and so the orinigal cartoon has a pretty straightforward "behave yourself or else" message. Like actually the most fairytales
@@SuperCosty2010 Actually, most fairytales had no moral messages until Perrault or the Victorians reworked them.
Btw, if you don't want your childhood ruined, stop reading here.
1) The male lead in Snow White fell in love with her corpse and wanted to keep it. In some versions, he had "marital relations" with it.
2) The male lead in Sleeping Beauty was married and impregnated the heroine in her coma.
3) There are lots of variants where Cinderella escapes her incestous father and is physically and $**ually abused by the male lead before they marry.
4) In one of the earliest versions of Cinderella, she had two stepmothers, but she killed the first one!
@@CrewmateWeiWuxian-t8d Also, I believe in many older versions of Beauty and the Beast, the father sells his daughter to the beast and she just has to accept her fate.
well they were drinking beer in the book and original movie and they were vandlizing prior to going to pleasure island, disney didnt shy away from dark elements as people assumed...they did show malificent kill one of her minions in snow white
I didn't even know this was coming out.
That shows how relevant Disney has become.
I rmember when each Disney release was anticipated more than Christmas.
Yeah. Back in the day of Disney VHS tapes. Good times! And they're never coming back! 😭
@@GenerationX1984 Ahh.. the Disney Vault.....
Lucky I got all the Blue Rays before they changed everything.
Not looking for to the re-dubs, edited, or 'new scenes added', or 'digitally remastered' versions.
Still have the original Letter-box Star Wars Trilogy (where Han shot first).
Disney has become what Pinocchio has sniffed off the streets in the beginning.
You just brought back all of those memories I had as a kid when I would anxiously await the original Beauty and the Beast, Aladin, Lion King and Mulan and watch all the promotional behind the scenes specials they would air before the movies came out. It feels kind of sad that that feeling of excitement and wonder is gone.
Peanut Child and the other wrong names were hilarious.
It's unbelieveable how the immersion of you talking to yourself from video to video just stays untouched. Solid work!
Getting to see pitch meetings immediately after they come out is tight tight tight!
I hope Ryan reviewes the russian, animated Pinocchio movie as well
It’s so tight you said it thrice!
Relax Tuco Salamanca
"Isn't that too many times the word 'tight'?"
"I don't know"
@@jotheunissen9274 "fair enough"
Tom Hanks is in the movie because of his previous experience in the Polar Express. Both are directed by Robert Zemeckis. The Pinocchio reboot is essentially The Polar Express 2: Electric Boogaloo.
5:54 they have an extra wow on the figurine box lol, i cant believe they got the catch phrase wrong
The constant mispronouncing of his name absolutely paralyzed me with laughter. Great work as always Ryan!!
@Sermon Institute For Success I honestly believe he's one of the funniest people on the Internet right now. He packs so much humor into so short a skit that it's almost unreal. And he does it every time!!
Ok
Really drives home that the writer does not know pinnochio
However at the end it's still the American pronunciation and thus wrong.
@@Ambar42 Hey shut up! So, Pachinko dick is actually…
I'm Italian and I'd like to spend a word on the original book's Coachman, who HAD to bring the kids to the Land of Toys in order to transform them.
That's because it wasn't the Coachman with some magical power to make donkeys out of kids, it was the kids THEMSELVES turning into donkeys by committing acts of stupidity for several months.
But of course, what was perfectly logic in the original book, in this movie had to be unclear
Moral of the story: _"Sometimes lying can get you out of tough situations"_
The math checks out.
That's definitely the lesson to be learned from this movie.
"You think we might be missing the entire point of the original?"
sums up every single live action remake they've ever done.