CHOOSING NOT TO SLEEP WITH HIM UNTIL YOU'RE MARRIED! 👄💋| SISTER-2-SISTER | Fumi Desalu-Vold

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 21 вер 2021
  • 👗 SHOP MY MERCH, FDV SPORT 🏃🏿‍♀️💨💨 HERE - fumi-desalu-vold.creator-spri... 👗
    INSTAGRAM - / fumidesaluvold
    MY LINKTREE
    linktr.ee/FumiDesaluVold
    I'm also an Amazon Influencer so support & shop :)
    THIS IS MY USA 🇺🇸 AMAZON STORE FRONT (UK 🇬🇧 VERSION COMING VERY SOON) 😊
    www.amazon.com/shop/fumidesal...
    FANCY LADYZ FASHION
    Use my discount code 'FUMI" to get 10% OFF on all FANCY LADYZ FASHION.
    ★FANY LADYZ DISCOUNT CODE★
    CODE FUMI
    www.fancyladyz.com/
    JUVIAS PLACE
    Use my discount code 'FUMI" to get 10% OFF on all Juvia's Place Beauty Products. ★JUVIA'S PLACE DISCOUNT CODE★
    www.juviasplace.com/
    PUSH UP TAPE
    MY LINK pushuptape.com/?ref=xkNs5zMR-...
    Use my discount code 'FUMI" to get 15% OFF on all PUSH UP TAPE Products. ★PUSH UP TAPE DISCOUNT CODE★
    pushuptape.com/
    COLOURPOP COSMETICS
    Use my discount code '5FUMI" to get 10% OFF on EVERYTHING & ANYTHING on the website. ★COLOURPOP DISCOUNT CODE★
    colourpop.com/
    COLOURED RAINE
    Use my discount code 'FUMI" to get 10% OFF on all COLOURED RAINE Beauty Products. ★COLOURED RAINE DISCOUNT CODE★
    colouredraine.com/
    GERARD COSMETICS
    Use my discount code 'FUMI" to get 20% OFF on all GERARD COSMETICS Beauty Products. ★GERARD COSMETICS DISCOUNT CODE★
    gerardcosmetics.com/
    BEAUTY BAKERIE
    Use my discount code 'FUMI" to get 10% OFF on all BEAUTY BAKERIE Beauty Products. ★BEAUTY BAKERIE DISCOUNT CODE★
    www.beautybakerie.com/
    ...............................................
    Smiling & waving to you all.
    F.D.V.
    PLS don't 4get to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, COMMENT & SHARE! :)))
    FUMI DESALU-VOLD FILM REEL.
    • Video
    MY NATIONAL COMMERCIALS
    1- Walden University Online Distance Learning Advertisement
    • Walden University Onli...
    This video is copy protected and cannot be downloaded or used in any capacity without my permission.
    .....................................................................................................................
    SOCIAL NETWORKS
    Fumidesaluvold@gmail.com
    SNAPCHAT - FumiDesaluVold1
    Follow me on Instagram - / fumidesaluvold
    Like me on FaceBook - / fumi-desalu-vold-17645...
    My Twitter - / fumidesaluvold
    Pinterest - / fumisfashion
    BUSINESS
    For make-up bookings and general enquiries please email
    FumiDesaluVold@gmail.com
    FUMI DESALU-VOLD IMDB
    www.imdb.com/name/nm1962872/
    DISCLAIMER: This video and description may contain affiliate links, which means that if you click on one of the product links and make a purchase, I may receive a small commission. This helps support the channel and allows us to continue to make videos like this. Thank you for the support!
    Director Ole Desalu-Vold
    MUSIC BY - MUSIC TUBE - THE EPIDEMIC SOUND PLAYER.
    ..............................................
    #fumidesaluvold #sister2sister #nothingbeforemarriage #advice #aunty
  • Навчання та стиль

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,2 тис.

  • @estareily467
    @estareily467 6 місяців тому +19

    This guy forgets my birthday..talks to me the following day, never makes up for it..and he wants to sleep with me
    ..what do I do?

    • @FumiDesaluVold
      @FumiDesaluVold  6 місяців тому +32

      Happy belated Birthday 🎂 sunshine! Not only should you not sleep with him, but you should no longer invest in this relationship. Any man that loves you cannot wait for your special day to shower his love and affection all over you. And if he forgot, he should not even be told what to do to make up for it. Move on and find a man that will love and appreciate the true QUEEN 👑 that you are. And if he has an issue with what I advised, tell to come and talk to me! love u. 😘 ❤️

    • @ashleysfamily564
      @ashleysfamily564 4 місяці тому +3

      Well said I really appreciate your advice and motivation to females and I just discovered your channel

    • @beharga7901
      @beharga7901 3 місяці тому

      I’d agree to sleep with him and then go MIA the day he is supposed to sleep with me.

    • @user-hg4hs4sf3c
      @user-hg4hs4sf3c 3 місяці тому

      wow thats a great advice i mean i dont know wat to say am really happy

    • @floratula1046
      @floratula1046 Місяць тому

      Good evening my pretty queen. I was married to a man in my Church no s..x before marriage but on wedding night I found out he can not perform, I was devastated but I had to move on and filled for divorce and started life all over again. I really need strength to be myself​@@FumiDesaluVold

  • @0mgCaley
    @0mgCaley 2 роки тому +688

    Not sleeping with a man takes away all time wasters and stops your heart being broken because there’s no soul ties. Abstinence also allows you to walk away from any mistreatment . Sex will never be the reason a man chooses to get married, and men know this, so don’t drop your standard.

  • @JIJII420
    @JIJII420 2 роки тому +1516

    Fumi is 52. Got married at 40 and had her child. Thank you Fumi for showing us what "age is nothing but a number" looks like. Literally 😍.

    • @JoskaTheTrend
      @JoskaTheTrend 2 роки тому +12

      Wow

    • @aliasmoonbyRayia
      @aliasmoonbyRayia 2 роки тому +47

      She looks 35 though 🤍 if she had said she was younger I would believe her

    • @gloriatoo22
      @gloriatoo22 2 роки тому +5

      ❤👍

    • @pinky-lett3501
      @pinky-lett3501 2 роки тому +2

      Inspiration 👋

    • @aadtie5633
      @aadtie5633 2 роки тому +47

      She had to struggle a lot for getting where she is.. for having a family of three.
      It seems like a fairytale when we look at her achievements but she endured a lot for it all.. age is just a number, very true... but when age is not on your side the struggle is real! That is what Fumi shows us.. that it's not easy to take the less taken route but certainly it's not impossible and fight to get it against all odds.
      She's an inspiration.. 😄❤️

  • @lovegospel3191
    @lovegospel3191 2 роки тому +374

    My husband said he knew I was his wife the very first time he saw me walk in at work. He kept asking me for a date and I kept brushing him off. When I finally gave in, he asked me to marry him in the car near the end of that first date. I THOUGHT HE WAS JOKING. Here we are almost 21 years of marriage later. (P.S. ladies, DON’T give up the kitty kat! They’ll respect you for it.)

    • @colonelroymustang3529
      @colonelroymustang3529 Рік тому +1

      what does that mean?

    • @billionairejumzietopbabe3304
      @billionairejumzietopbabe3304 Рік тому +9

      @@colonelroymustang3529 meaning don't indulge in sex ..... I think 🤔

    • @gibboranks
      @gibboranks Рік тому

      ​@@colonelroymustang3529 don't know😂

    • @amandamilo3454
      @amandamilo3454 Рік тому

      ​@@colonelroymustang3529"kitty kat" is a way of saying pussy without saying it. I recently heard it referred to as "tussy cat"

  • @lakitawright5012
    @lakitawright5012 2 роки тому +395

    Virgin when I married at 35. No regrets! He’s the greatest husband and we have amazing children.

  • @theepiphanyeffect
    @theepiphanyeffect 2 роки тому +414

    This is truly some good stuff... I remember being invited out on a date by a guy I truly liked & who I thought liked me too. The plan was to go to the movies after work. That day I had a truly busy shift at work & missed lunch. When he texted me asking if we were still on etc I said yes & mentioned that I missed lunch & would have to just have some theatre food I guess. He responded "Ok" & then accidentally sent me a text he was supposed to send to one of his friends saying "Taking this bitch out to the movies tonight. She missed lunch on purpose & now expects me to also buy her food & I really don't want to spend any money on this bitch" 😳 I was rather shocked, hurt & disappointed I didn't even respond back I just didn't show up. I was always told to have my backup money when going out because you just never know, that low life thought I needed to wait for him to feed me 😐😂 Moral of the story: When your intentions are pure, truth reveals itself. Thank God I dodged that bullet

    • @busiswamdluli3673
      @busiswamdluli3673 2 роки тому +81

      Girl you're divinely protected!

    • @adaobinduka8036
      @adaobinduka8036 2 роки тому +41

      Wow...just wow

    • @omahify1470
      @omahify1470 2 роки тому +45

      This happens when you have pure intentions and a clean heart.

    • @rjclassictv4536
      @rjclassictv4536 2 роки тому +39

      OH GOSH SORRY FOR THE BAD EXPERIENCE AND THANK GOD FOR HAVING SHOWED YOU A SNAKE

    • @momonaturale
      @momonaturale 2 роки тому

      That wasn't a bullet, that was a whole missile!

  • @blessedlauralee
    @blessedlauralee 2 роки тому +599

    My husband and I dated for 2 years. I was raised that you wait until your honeymoon. We have been married for 37 years. I’m so happy that the only man , I have been with is my husband.

  • @numberkayjonathan6985
    @numberkayjonathan6985 2 роки тому +112

    ‘It weakens you (ladies)but strengthen him’ ‘Let him love you more than you love him’ 👌

  • @IntimeMagda
    @IntimeMagda Рік тому +217

    I'm 29 and still a virgin. I've made a decision to remain so untill I'm married.
    Thank you for this aunt Fumi. And thank you to all other comments that made me realize I am normal and I am not alone.

    • @chinecheremgenevieve8595
      @chinecheremgenevieve8595 Рік тому +1

      I am not, but I would like to know how you guys feel, do you feel honey?

    • @guess7576
      @guess7576 Рік тому +2

      @@chinecheremgenevieve8595very very very much...😰

    • @bellbell872
      @bellbell872 Рік тому +4

      You better keep it

    • @sihledunamiz420
      @sihledunamiz420 Рік тому +24

      This is beautiful, stay a virgin until marriage, you will not compare your husband to any other man, you will not have soul ties with any other man. If you already have lost it then you can still choose abstinence with your next partner until marriage if you want to.

    • @marywilliams3520
      @marywilliams3520 Рік тому +13

      You are very normal and smart! I wish I would have waited until marriage I had to repent though but, I am now celibate going on 4 1/2 years waiting on the man God has for me. I admire you and all the ladies & gentlemen that are waiting til marriage.

  • @onlymarcia1
    @onlymarcia1 2 роки тому +919

    I'm 23 and doing celibacy since late 2019. I feel good about my journey, sometimes ain't easy. I've decided the next man im having sex is going to be husband.
    I pray that God sends me a man that will honor my values. I trust in Him!

    • @oktina5944
      @oktina5944 2 роки тому +52

      Amen, God is preparing him for you and you will definitely meet him at the right time, my darling sister.

    • @n.u.e.l.l.e
      @n.u.e.l.l.e 2 роки тому +24

      Same here darling

    • @estheryokie1732
      @estheryokie1732 2 роки тому +55

      @@n.u.e.l.l.e trust God he will bring that right person. I waited for 11 years if God did it for me he will do the same for u my dear

    • @mizzmolly7649
      @mizzmolly7649 2 роки тому +61

      Girl, you're just 23. Enjoy life. Develop a career, a passion, travel, experience people and cultures and one day God will place that man in your path.

    • @chizzyjacinth260
      @chizzyjacinth260 2 роки тому +5

      We're in this girllll❤️

  • @winningkateolajumoke2631
    @winningkateolajumoke2631 2 роки тому +1062

    Staying away from sex till after wedding is not an old myth, it is what God wants. The reason we keep having problems is because we either relegate God or take Him out of the picture. Besides, how many men do you want to sleep with before you tie the knot? It is only both spiritually and emotionally reasonable to sleep with your husband only.

  • @DEEVAJM
    @DEEVAJM 2 роки тому +140

    Fumi my grandmother told me that one of the measures of a good man is that he brings you something whenever he comes to visit. I had a man who brought me a bag of oranges one time he came to visit because he had called ahead and asked what should he take to me and I told him it was OK I wanted nothing. He said he bought the oranges while in traffic because he didn't want to come empty handed. 😊

    • @elemiang4001
      @elemiang4001 Рік тому +1

      Awww ❤❤❤

    • @kidchocolate9253
      @kidchocolate9253 Рік тому +12

      That's sweet. Grandma is correct especially if he's coming for dinner or a party. A bottle of wine, hor d'oeuvres, beer or flowers. Something!

    • @nikkinanette8807
      @nikkinanette8807 Рік тому +2

      Awww😂🤭🌸

    • @zvezdoblyat
      @zvezdoblyat Рік тому +2

      I love oranges 🍊 this comment made me happy

  • @Negra_mbl
    @Negra_mbl 2 роки тому +151

    This video encouraged me even more to save sex for marriage; I wanna honour God and be clear headed in Jesus’ Name🙌🏾 thanks auntie💕

    • @colonelroymustang3529
      @colonelroymustang3529 Рік тому

      I started fucking around when I was 13 & I never heard of anyone that would wait til marriage in 2022. It‘s just weird

    • @newnew-mv1uj
      @newnew-mv1uj Рік тому +1

      Amen

    • @pamela4016
      @pamela4016 Рік тому +1

      Amen!

  • @dynamicdee9150
    @dynamicdee9150 2 роки тому +516

    When you are clear headed in a relationship, you never settle for less, because you can see clearly that you deserve the best and you are worth every effort.

  • @faa8882
    @faa8882 2 роки тому +397

    Best thing I ever did (apart from accepting Jesus) is waiting till our wedding night to do the do! It helped me choose right especially marrying at 41 I couldn't afford to have a beautiful wedding and an unhappy marriage. I thank God for my marriage, it is the sweetest thing to God's glory!
    Even after 6months of dating I never rang my DH once. He planned lovely dates at least once a week and after 2 months of dating it was twice a week. Ladies, please let men plan dates and date you with effort. Many blessings!

    • @legal_beagle5294
      @legal_beagle5294 2 роки тому +20

      When I was planning my lil sister’s wedding, I was the one all gun-ho! She stated to me simply as to why she wasn’t super excited about a wedding….” I’m more concerned about having a lasting marriage…” Jaw dropped and totally in awe!! They’re married 12 years to date!!

    • @brandybright8372
      @brandybright8372 2 роки тому +13

      Wow , when we act God way he always got us covered

    • @wwilliams5430
      @wwilliams5430 2 роки тому +7

      So encouraging! I've been abstinent 18 years and almost gave in last month but I felt so convicted and jumped up.

    • @allennamugalu9750
      @allennamugalu9750 2 роки тому

      Waaawu for the encouragement😊

    • @salamatusman2814
      @salamatusman2814 2 роки тому +1

      Jesus ain't God tho,but a prophet of God.

  • @fashionandluxury101
    @fashionandluxury101 2 роки тому +67

    Waiting to be married before having sex is always the best advice in my humble opinion. It doesn’t necessarily mean that your marriage will last; that takes work. However, it’s Biblical and God always gives us a manual for a happy marriage ( it doesn’t mean you don’t have problems ) but two committed people will strife yo make the marriage working

  • @festaniekobap4377
    @festaniekobap4377 2 роки тому +59

    Oh yes!!! Me too I was on my 30-31 when I decide to start abstinence, and I'm on my 37 working on myself, extend my roots and praying for the One. *Patience is Power* 😘 Thank you Fumi.

  • @annanicole7642
    @annanicole7642 2 роки тому +228

    On my best relationship…. We waited and he proposed in 6 months… married in 8. Still married 13 years later… it was both of our decision to wait

    • @Latte-girly90
      @Latte-girly90 2 роки тому +10

      So do you think it's true people that wait to have sex get married faster?

    • @isabellamomodu1812
      @isabellamomodu1812 2 роки тому +9

      @@Latte-girly90 alot of times yes, because they just cant wait

    • @eyegettit3535
      @eyegettit3535 2 роки тому +19

      @@Latte-girly90 yes , and it's God divine order to wait til marriage

    • @mays_alpha
      @mays_alpha 2 роки тому +15

      @@Latte-girly90 It’s possible, but the important thing is to not get carried away and speed things up too much. You can still be glaze-eyed and wait till marriage, so you *have* to ensure you know him on a deep, serious level rather than speed up the marriage in order to engage in that. All best to you darlings ❤️

    • @joshipp761
      @joshipp761 2 роки тому +4

      God honors and rewards obedience.

  • @caminaraphael8722
    @caminaraphael8722 2 роки тому +373

    Take notes young ladies, Auntie Fumi just dropping jewels..

    • @Rebecca57097ssss
      @Rebecca57097ssss 2 роки тому +2

      📝

    • @Kiara-xh3he
      @Kiara-xh3he 2 роки тому +6

      These are the facts, especially when she said “men are simple” that’s so true! Her wisdom is undefeated!!!

    • @liztaylor7787
      @liztaylor7787 2 роки тому +3

      I live for Fumi telling her stories with her eyes!

  • @UncommonLeadership777
    @UncommonLeadership777 4 місяці тому +5

    I had a kid at 21, baby daddy wasn’t ready and left me. I set a plan for myself. I wouldn’t give myself away to anymore men. I chose celibacy after that. I would not budge. I learned my power in those two years!!!!When I met my (now) husband I told him no sex before marriage. We were engaged in 8 months. 21 years of marriage later -we are blessed. Marriage is not easy-but I will say…having a marriage founded on Godly, values and principles is key. Sex comes and go-it’s amazing and at times it’s average. Love is deeply rooted sacrifice. If you’re still reading this I hope you find the love you deserve. You are worth it!❤

  • @cherriflinn
    @cherriflinn 2 роки тому +33

    “You think he’s the best thing since pockets on jeans?” had me on the floor🤣🤣🤣. Love you Fumi!

  • @unknownunknown504
    @unknownunknown504 2 роки тому +275

    When Fumi said, "You get their attention by not being there" and "It's you who he wants in particular because you're not giving him the attention that he wants or thought he had," that truly blessed me. That's what I needed to hear and it was confirmation.

    • @ontlametsesetswamorago389
      @ontlametsesetswamorago389 2 роки тому +1

      Hie Fumi.I am listening from Botswana for the first time. I love you and will follow you awesome tutorials. You are beautiful darling🤩.

    • @awmy3109
      @awmy3109 2 роки тому +2

      Nah, that's how you get dumbed by a mature man who doesn't tolerate stupid mind games.

    • @AjTory
      @AjTory 2 роки тому +12

      @@awmy3109 it’s not stupid mind games
      Men sometimes have a habit of being egotistical of themselves

  • @voguehaven5154
    @voguehaven5154 2 роки тому +29

    I hear what she is saying, but one thing I will add to this, is that being elusive, unattainable and hard to get is a LIFESTYLE. One truly needs to be genuinely busy with working in a job they love, working on their physique, working on enjoyable hobbies, having loads of friends, starting a business, and investing in themselves....etc. When you have so much going on and so much responsibilities, you become elusive and hard to get naturally.
    I use to fake being busy when I was younger and eventually the façade goes away.
    Now that I am older and have a lot more going on, I am soo truly busy and high on life, that I have unintentionally become elusive and hard to get.

  • @4439chiquita
    @4439chiquita 2 роки тому +45

    I recently started following this woman and I must say, I already love her..! 😍 Her contagious laughter is to another level and I enjoy her way of speaking and her accent. Her videos are entertaining and interesting as well. Excellent job, Fumi..!👏👏

  • @ponyhaly6131
    @ponyhaly6131 2 роки тому +31

    Thank you for this. What you said makes a lot of sense. I'm still virgin. There're men who tried to talk me out of it. Sleeping with a guy doesn't mean he actually wants you. You just have to make sure that he loves you more than you love him. I will keep this to remind myself :)

    • @ponyhaly6131
      @ponyhaly6131 2 роки тому

      when a woman get intimate with a guy, there's a certain hormone that will tie a woman to a man. That's exactly what you described as "clear head"

  • @alexisarrizon6083
    @alexisarrizon6083 2 роки тому +219

    My number one rule with men is asking the burning question are they worthy of me? I have high standards. I refuse to be someone's after thought. Excellent video Fumi

    • @godsgirl7201
      @godsgirl7201 2 роки тому +5

      ❤️

    • @paulokello5981
      @paulokello5981 2 роки тому +2

      Or on the flip side, are you worthy of them?

    • @yanicketienne1464
      @yanicketienne1464 2 роки тому +11

      @@paulokello5981 It’s always incredible to me how some men can just show their lack of awareness by asking “are you worthy of them?” If a woman states that she has ‘high standards’ chances are she knows the true meaning of those words and she knows exactly who she is. She definitely knows her worth. The sad part is that too many men have no clue and totally miss it.

    • @cl499
      @cl499 2 роки тому +5

      A man who asks such a question is a pick me.

  • @JIJII420
    @JIJII420 2 роки тому +721

    " The work is in finding out WHO you're marrying. " president Fumi

    • @godsgirl7201
      @godsgirl7201 2 роки тому +8

      🦋

    • @helenlewis2570
      @helenlewis2570 2 роки тому +7

      Such valuable and appreciated advice Fumi. I'm ready to start dating after 18years. I was interested in someone and your advice came at just the right time. I will wait a little longer for my person.❤ ❤

    • @debbiedouglas2932
      @debbiedouglas2932 2 роки тому +2

      I love this clip, it's very refreshing. Thank you aunty Funmi.

    • @fordaiffa6022
      @fordaiffa6022 2 роки тому +3

      YES I Should have done that prior to have a familly
      Oh Boy Oh Boy We should have her create a class for all young men and women

    • @ivyjimanze339
      @ivyjimanze339 2 роки тому +2

      How do i know he loves me more?

  • @G254611
    @G254611 Рік тому +20

    Well said! I am in a celibate relationship and its going really well
    It avoids wrong soul ties and sexually transmitted demons
    I LOVE the examples you give!
    Thanks for telling us about Nubian Skin. Shall go have a look

  • @moniquenjels3118
    @moniquenjels3118 2 роки тому +34

    This has hit home. I can testify that having sex before marriage can blurr your goals in a relationship.

    • @user-vf7nr2ci7k
      @user-vf7nr2ci7k 2 місяці тому

      Sometimes because persons get married as Virgins and doesn't work out

  • @blossom6235
    @blossom6235 2 роки тому +329

    This is sound advice, I could not agree with you more on this one Fums!!!!!!!!!!! I am at that stage in my life now like you said, I am older and know what I want in life, I've made up my mind no more sleeping with a man, I realised that every time I slept with someone I was dating I gave away a piece of myself, I cannot get back, I also realised after sex the dynamics changed, it seems like the guy who was hunting me, lost interest, after he got what he wanted, I've learned the hard way, I've been celibate for 5 years now and loving it, I feel so much better for it, I don't even feel like dating anyone anymore.

  • @Glorious353
    @Glorious353 2 роки тому +176

    Mama used to say, “why would he buy the cow if he can get the milk for free?” God’s word: Except the wedding bed be undefiled”

  • @leticiachiok8057
    @leticiachiok8057 2 роки тому +101

    Fumi, you are the Queen! What you shared was so inspiring! A woman's value increases when she respects herself, by giving importance to her own time, presence and her words and principles.

  • @futiish
    @futiish 2 роки тому +26

    I am stunned!! I pray everyone watches this! Bless you Fumi!

  • @ROSE-ue7pe
    @ROSE-ue7pe 2 роки тому +334

    My only marriage. We went on a date June 5th, got engaged June 11, married July 12th. We're both Christian. Did NOT have premarital sex. We stayed married 22 years. Married in 1982 had 1 child and divorced 22 years later. He passed away in 2013.Now I'm in a relationship for 1year and 7 months and we are Not having premarital sex either..I'm 64 he's 62..hopefully this is my forever love..❣

  • @blessyayra4649
    @blessyayra4649 2 роки тому +173

    I love this woman. She is full of wisdom and display her maturity.

  • @nocimnotcreativewithnames1014
    @nocimnotcreativewithnames1014 Рік тому +7

    Fumi needs her own show, she is the bigger sister we all need in our lives.

  • @hawasana4389
    @hawasana4389 2 роки тому +26

    Thanks for teaching young Queens virtues, elegance and how to stay classy. You are definitely the Aunty we need. Abstinence is hard but worth everything. I am not willing to be emotionally attach to a temporary situation. If He is the one, he will wait.

  • @OhJanney
    @OhJanney 2 роки тому +143

    Girl come on fumi!!. Hearing this gave me chills. I was in a relationship in which I was NOT clear headed. Wasted my time and finally ended it after 6 years. Either way it's been a year since then and I find myself still thinking about him all the time even while knowing I felt like I was suffocating being with him and completely lost myself, constantly sad, heartbreak after the other and never feeling enough. After the breakup I went back to school immediately to finish my BSN, got some certificates under my belt and started travel nursing with the goal of saving money to start several businesses and and buy some rental property. It has not been easy being by myself this pandemic season but I know it's for the best. I don't know what the future holds but I'm trying to stay positive with you he hope of it has been be better than that. I'm 31 by the way. Thanks, a little encouragement is definitely needed sometimes.

    • @sasha-kim5071
      @sasha-kim5071 2 роки тому +5

      I'm so proud of you. Keep hanging on in there. Always get your bag 🛍️/ certifications 🗞️. Maybe consider doing some inner work/ cord cutting ceremony... It may help with taking them off your mind.

    • @DianaMillan
      @DianaMillan 2 роки тому +6

      Congratulations on your BSN and your nursing career! You are killing it! I know how hard it can be because I’m scheduled to get my BSN at the end of the year. Kudos to you and thanks for service! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿

    • @malisaramkissoon1853
      @malisaramkissoon1853 2 роки тому +3

      Girlll this sounds just like me,I promise it gets better with time. Have patience

    • @yanicketienne1464
      @yanicketienne1464 2 роки тому +7

      @Janney Swaray: A famous celebrity often gives this advice to women who are still thinking about an ex. “Ask yourself, would you want 6 more years of the same things that you endured in that relationship?” Keep going through your healing process with prayer and meditation. You are stronger already. Blessings.

  • @samosational
    @samosational 2 роки тому +143

    Sister-2-Sister's back!!! I really like how you approached this topic, without slut shaming but rather speaking your truth! Always a pleasure Fumi! ✨🌹

  • @Happynlucky
    @Happynlucky Рік тому +15

    I love this segment. Ladies don't give up cookie fast. My husband married me because i did not give in. He respected my body. He married me for my character & my mind.I was not a serial dater. I was more of a nerd girl. Seeing my beautiful sisters give cookie away in relationships taught me lessons. We had a very quick engagement for me marriage is no joke. I grew up in this marriage both of us did this. Being married for 20 years has been the hardest job that I've ever had if you want to call it a job. It also give me wonderful blessings. It is easier to quit a marriage than to stay in one, you go thru all of it the good, the bad, up and down, the rich and the poor Sickness & health. I wanted a partner,not a parent, not some that would dictate to me what wear or how to be. Marry someone that you can see yourself with on the worst day of your life and know he has your back. Go beyond looks & status.

  • @expressionsofselfallowing5574
    @expressionsofselfallowing5574 2 роки тому +8

    Wow, I love this session of Sister to Sister. I am always so inspired by your advice and although I have not been clear-headed in the past I am encouraged to do so in the future. Continue to inspire and teach us. This is exactly what our communities are missing, the elders no longer sit with the youth to share their knowledge and experience and we are poorer because of it. The knowledge and value of age is so often lost and the trauma is repeated throughout generations. Thank you for being that elder

  • @TheMadameLabrie
    @TheMadameLabrie 2 роки тому +156

    I been with my husband 21 years and everything you said was 100% Keep being beautiful Auntie 💜💜💜💜💜🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

  • @irenejohnson53
    @irenejohnson53 2 роки тому +196

    This is true and practical advice that is much needed. Most girls focus on the wedding and do not focus on what having a successful marriage means. There is more to marriage than sex. Sex is supposed to be the icing on the cake for a married couple. I believe that having sex before marriage or not depends on your beliefs.
    For those who do not believe in sex before marriage, hold on to your beliefs and find a partner that reciprocates or honors your beliefs. The reason being that if you sacrifice those beliefs and things do not work out in the relationship then you are not left emotionally scarred and carrying emotional baggage. Sex has a way of complicating matters as it loses the focus on real courtship where a man and a woman really take the time to know one another as aunty Fumi has pointed out. Also even if you are not fussed it is still good to abstain until you are sure that the guy is serious about the real you instead of being a notch on his bedpost.
    Love your channel Fumi and definitely like sister to sister. Keep it up. 💕💖😍

    • @ebelekaine7673
      @ebelekaine7673 2 роки тому

      L

    • @confidenceoparaocha4226
      @confidenceoparaocha4226 2 роки тому

      Gbam!💪correct

    • @zeeb116
      @zeeb116 2 роки тому +1

      I respect this.

    • @pussydestroyer69285
      @pussydestroyer69285 2 роки тому +1

      Thank u for not shaming others for not believing in it. I’m also waiting but I feel that not waiting is ok too. Although I don’t want children (might change my mind) so I wonder how that will play out

  • @TheThebestoffspring
    @TheThebestoffspring 2 роки тому +20

    This was a great Chat. The story was a powerful lesson on being clear and seeing the person for who they are.

  • @aliciadavis8586
    @aliciadavis8586 3 місяці тому +1

    This is 2 years ago, but honey, this is amazing. A sister talk that's needed even 2 years later.

  • @konversationswithkellylets7065
    @konversationswithkellylets7065 2 роки тому +85

    This was EVERYTHING. I've been married for 23 yrs and this advice is everything. I wish someone would have been open and honest with me 30 yrs ago. Keep sharing. Absolutely love you💕

  • @phatzzy2
    @phatzzy2 2 роки тому +90

    Omg!! You just took all the ladies to church with this one Fumi, this is a Master Class of Advice !!! My Sister , write a book, Fumi Nation's GuideTo Being The Ultimate Woman, Sister To Sister, now go, make it happen!!!

  • @rashidashabazz7319
    @rashidashabazz7319 2 місяці тому +2

    Your LAUGHTER is medicine for the SOUL. Your AUTHENTICITY is a BLESSING 🙏🏽💚😇

  • @marjorjorietillman856
    @marjorjorietillman856 Рік тому +7

    Fumi, that was a most wonderful lesson about your date, it’s a lesson that we needed to hear and use!! By the way, I just LOVE that good healthy laugh you have!! Please continue teaching, because it’s soooo needed nowadays, more than ever!!

  • @theijeomalyons
    @theijeomalyons 2 роки тому +311

    This video is going viral...And Fumi is hitting 500k this year!!!! Loving every minute of the video! Thank you for sharing yourself with us xxxx

  • @UnboxLili88
    @UnboxLili88 2 роки тому +65

    "At 5, I was out of the house." I howled! That's so funny. I'm in a very happy relationship but that doesn't mean I can't take some pointers from this video. Haha. Love it.

  • @delilashapaka8104
    @delilashapaka8104 2 роки тому +18

    I am in awe, 46 now and very hopeful seeing such a light working woman brilliant in understanding of who we are as woman and that we can thrive when we choose to be of sound mind.
    I learned a lot today.
    It is my 1st time seeing your channel after listening to one set I could not miss another.
    Thank you for sharing your life I appreciate you.
    I will be busy all weekend catching up on the list of your channels.
    Love from Africa; Namibia

  • @KC-bo7bj
    @KC-bo7bj Рік тому +20

    I could sit down with a cup of coffee all day and listen to her smiling to myself.yes queen preach.love u 🥰

  • @nataschageorgina7108
    @nataschageorgina7108 2 роки тому +183

    Just gave me more reason to commit to my celibacy journey, thank you Fumi♥️🙏🏾

  • @marinamayaki3091
    @marinamayaki3091 2 роки тому +44

    This is soooooooo true!!
    That’s how I attracted my husband and we are now happily married for 16 years and counting.
    Looking forward to many more happy years ahead

  • @francescamilton
    @francescamilton 2 роки тому +31

    I really love your confidence and your purpose...it helps me so much as a dark skinned black women who I never felt valued for my complexion

    • @nancinew8288
      @nancinew8288 2 роки тому +8

      Whaaaat? Dark skin is gorgeous‼️ Created for you by God himself girl. Love yourself always❤️

    • @queensun6059
      @queensun6059 Рік тому +4

      @@nancinew8288 your dark skin is 🔥 what so many people are jealous of😌wear it proudly. you're a Melanin billionaire🥳yay!!!

    • @hautecouture2228
      @hautecouture2228 Рік тому +1

      A lot of lighter skin black women feel superior to other black women . Especially people from India their entire self value and worth revolves around their skin tone . So wrong

  • @taki3927
    @taki3927 2 роки тому +3

    Please do more sister to sister videos!! I laughed at your story about the guy who bought lunch before coming to see you. You are wonderfully graced with wisdom that us women need to equip ourselves with!

  • @meidjiesimeus5944
    @meidjiesimeus5944 2 роки тому +24

    Fumi I love you ohhhh, now I am more confident dating without sex. I stop sleeping when dating since 2017, the best decision ever. I love the fact that you said sex weakens women and strengthen men.

  • @daphneharris4231
    @daphneharris4231 2 роки тому +22

    This is what we call wisdom boys and girls this comes with age and experience.listen and learn.

  • @annkdrama-queen1254
    @annkdrama-queen1254 2 роки тому +11

    I luv you Fumi, I agree with everything that you said, that’s how I’ve lived my life and never regretted anything that I did. I’m definitely sharing this video with my daughters so that they can hear it again from another mom. You’re the best💞

  • @dkingskid6946
    @dkingskid6946 2 роки тому +1

    Wow! I'm so very happy and super excited meeting a very wonderful and unique woman with a heart of gold like this, OMG! Where has she been all these years and what have i been doing that I'm just connecting with such a beautiful soul this now. Well thank God it's not late yet, I'm still single and almost 40, no man yet too, but seeing your videos this night has stirred up so much hope in me. I never had a sister of my own and if it's possible I'd asked to be adopted as one. All things some humans could hold as secret to themselves alone you chose to share, God bless you sis. You're a golden heart, love you so much.

  • @tykedasmith5888
    @tykedasmith5888 2 роки тому +39

    Great advice Fumi! I use to feel like a woman can get to know a man before sex, then once it happens he still can change and move onto the next woman. But being older I know for a fact that a man is not going to waste his time if he is truly interested and see a potential future with you! If sex is all he wants, trust me, it will show and those type of men will not stick around very long if they don't get it. Sex can be an amazing thing between two people who love one another, but being in love is so beautiful and feels even better!

  • @kimjones3262
    @kimjones3262 2 роки тому +77

    Thank you for this video. I’m 51 and waiting for marriage for sex with my husband. It has been a challenging journey with a lot of heartbreak once men knew where I stood ( and I always let them know upfront so that they could make a decision for themselves). I received a lot of ‘ man you’re a strong woman’ or ‘ I really admire you’ however, they would exit stage left. I’ve had great relationships with wonderful men who simply were challenged with waiting until marriage. This has been my choice I understand that some may not understand but the one gift I want to give my husband is a sacred space ( my body) kept especially for him. When women give our bodies away we lose a sense of sensibility because we are emotionally tied. Men can have sex and walk away as though nothing happens women however, will maintain an emotional tie even when we know the relationship isn’t right because of a sexual tie. With all of the relationships I’ve had I may have regretted not communicating enough or not not being open enough BUT I have never said ‘ damn, I wish I would’ve slept with him!!’ waiting is better not to gain control but to let the man know that you’re worth the wait.

    • @x80WildCat08x
      @x80WildCat08x 2 роки тому +1

      You best expect the same from your future husband..

    • @femibrowne1760
      @femibrowne1760 2 роки тому

      Fumi you are the best. This also should apply in a boy friend n girl friend relationship. When u r no longer married or become a widow n u still need a friend.

    • @Smile56329
      @Smile56329 2 роки тому

      Kim Jones Yet another one who believes women should wait but it’s not as bad if men don’t.😒🙃 Ps. I believe in saving it for marriage but I believe BOTH men and women should. I don’t know if your a Christian but if you are you should go read where it says not to fornicate talking about men and women.🤭

  • @mphomoji4254
    @mphomoji4254 2 роки тому

    Wooow! This woman.... just wow!!! I'm emotional too..and the compass being tied to everything is spot on

  • @sunnyseason6543
    @sunnyseason6543 Рік тому +1

    Fumi, thank you for educating us women about so many different aspects of life. A lot of times you bring up my thoughts that come with experience. These are the best big sister chats. And you always hammer that nail directly on the head.

  • @annedebrandofficial6738
    @annedebrandofficial6738 2 роки тому +59

    that laughter is everything. I'm here for it all.

  • @wmSylviah
    @wmSylviah 2 роки тому +68

    19yrs old and my note book filled up already,
    Auntie Fumi be doing the most💕🌻⚘🇰🇪......loooove you💛

  • @toluwalashealonge5493
    @toluwalashealonge5493 2 роки тому +1

    Im really grateful for this. In going through a traumatic experience from betrayal from someone I really loved and looking forward, when I'm ready again, this is 💯

  • @barbaraodametey8548
    @barbaraodametey8548 2 роки тому +9

    This was literally the Best advice I heard in my 31years of living on Waiting! It strengthens him, but weakens you!😆😅 UNADULTERATED Words! N the laughing in between is everything! Thanks aunt Funmi!

  • @Earthomo
    @Earthomo 2 роки тому +97

    Your advice on men is true Naija advice that we grew up receiving from our big sisters in Nigeria. Sadly when we move abroad many of us start emulating our western sisters/more liberal ways of dealing with men……. which don’t work long term.
    Thank you for reminding me of what works. Women being confident in our value, being fun then poof! disappearing/being scarce and allowing a man to be what he naturally should be if he’s truly interested in us: the hunter. Great advice. 💋

    • @BarlowEnterprises
      @BarlowEnterprises 2 роки тому +28

      It works not because one is western, liberal or not. I am born and raised a Black American, Beloved. Her advice is sure because it is grounded in God's word. It is a Kingdom word. Therefore the principle, my friend, works for us all. Please do not think all western sisters are not taught well in these matters. I am married 20 years. I did not have sex with my husband before we married. I learned and understood what she is teaching from my youth and have taught or daughter (and our sons) the same. Peace.

    • @gladroos
      @gladroos 2 роки тому +6

      Fumi delivered an invaluable message with grace, humor and love.
      Additionally, thank you @Jéneen Barlow for sharing and clarifying that some of us Black Americans have traditional values. I was taught the same principles Fumi shared by my mother and aunts.

    • @nymiss1101
      @nymiss1101 2 роки тому +11

      @@BarlowEnterprises Thank you for this comment. It’s bothersome how people act like those of us raised in the west have no home training.

    • @stepahead5944
      @stepahead5944 2 роки тому +1

      @@BarlowEnterprises Thank you. 👏🏿

    • @sg2570
      @sg2570 2 роки тому

      Not all western sisters, this is a stereotype me thinks. But i hear what you are saying. I think Faith definately has alot to do with it and how a woman sees herself, we need to truely see our selves as precious gems that we dont give away too easy.

  • @faithfranca168
    @faithfranca168 2 роки тому +115

    The story at the end.. I was almost eating my phone up. I was glued. So much wisdom and laughter in this video. The way you have broken down everything takes me all back to self love and even extending that love to others that you both end up with love. Love it love it love it 😍

  • @EMGez
    @EMGez 2 роки тому +2

    That's true! You are an example Fumi for a lot of young girls!!! I am greatful for that. Thanks!!!

  • @margeauxjenkins12
    @margeauxjenkins12 Рік тому

    I pray that young women listen to this. Great advice!

  • @Earthomo
    @Earthomo 2 роки тому +39

    Fumi is spot on regarding differences in UK and US healthcare. UK care is top notch and free. US care is based on money. It is what it is.

  • @anesarampersaud6060
    @anesarampersaud6060 2 роки тому +309

    Hii Fumi, I always love watching your videos … Based on this video, I’m not ashamed to share with yal that I’m 25 years of age and still a virgin, this being my choice / or my way to live my life… reason being, is because I’ve always promised myself that the first man that I would have sex with would be my husband & I intend to keep it that way for as long as I’m able 😊And I also believe that any man that is willing to wait, truely loves you ❤️

    • @girlnextdoor2836
      @girlnextdoor2836 2 роки тому +32

      Thats wonderful..Keep going honey.I’m not a virgin myself but I’m celibate for years now.It’s good for my well-being and protects me from a lot of men with ill intentions.

    • @excuseme9458
      @excuseme9458 2 роки тому +5

      Same ❤️

    • @violetselene244
      @violetselene244 2 роки тому +18

      That’s awesome! I’m 25 as well and wish I was still a virgin. Good for you! ❤️

    • @Queenestherstrybe
      @Queenestherstrybe 2 роки тому +9

      @@violetselene244 you can choose to stay sex free, I mean celibate until marriage. God help you. Amen

    • @adekemiogundipe3378
      @adekemiogundipe3378 2 роки тому +2

      You are strengthened my sis

  • @windonthevalley
    @windonthevalley 2 роки тому +1

    I am blessed to have found you ❤ You are a Godess! I got to be 69yrs this year, I'm grateful to be here with you today. I've been lost to myself, deeply but I will rise again! Wish I could say ALL that I would/could, but Thank You! Love ❤and Many blessings! 🙏⚘

  • @NJ_1315
    @NJ_1315 2 роки тому +1

    I thoroughly enjoyed this!!! Thank you for sharing!

  • @aquarius8325
    @aquarius8325 2 роки тому +5

    Auntie Fumi what excellent advice! My husband and I have been married for 3 years and we didn't live together or sleep together before marriage. This is my first marriage and his second, I'm 38 and he's 52. He had plenty of time to grow from his youthful mistakes. We both have children and didn't want anymore. He's got grown children and grandchildren and mine are teenagers. We were best friends for 7 years and built a beautiful friendship during that time. Our engagement was less than a year and we had a very small ceremony, us my sons the notary and two witnesses. We had a reception a few months later. He knows how important my kids are to me so the courting process included them. We connected on the other important levels before intimacy was introduced. It's been a beautiful process of learning about each other in that way. It's a different type of connection for sure. We're truly bonded and it radiates to other parts of our lives. If you can wait I'd greatly advise you to do so. You're making clearer choices without sex being there to cloud your judgment. Men do need to hunt and making yourself scarce actually does help. Love you Auntie and thanks for sharing!

  • @ladyjack7616
    @ladyjack7616 2 роки тому +44

    Hello Fumi! I really enjoy you vlogs. My Mom always told me " let him look for you. Don't always be available". I have be with my husband for 32 years. And I agree with everything you and my Mom have said.

  • @gods_favorite5912
    @gods_favorite5912 2 роки тому +1

    I just stumbled on this channel she reminds me of a rich cool aunt that gives good gifts for Xmas & always has the best advice I’m in Love with this channel speaking nothing but the real 💕💕

  • @gawapritchard6753
    @gawapritchard6753 5 місяців тому +1

    I so needed this tonight. 68 years, yes but getting back into the dating game. I needed this affirmation right NOW

  • @mariselnegron9817
    @mariselnegron9817 2 роки тому +23

    I really enjoyed your conversation. Thank you for sharing your story I'm in the middle of a divorce because of mental emotional and verbal abuse. I am currently 59 years old and not giving up and waiting for God to bring me the right man now that I am more mature I'll be more careful and I will consider your advice thank you so much.

    • @goodnessadibe1746
      @goodnessadibe1746 2 роки тому +2

      I pray for God to restore your marriage in jesus name, Amen

  • @catherinewilliams815
    @catherinewilliams815 2 роки тому +17

    AMEN SISTER, WELL SPOKEN. 37YRS HERE. The words you have spoken are so true.

  • @Expensive-op6pn
    @Expensive-op6pn 2 роки тому +1

    I love it! Taking a lot of notes and will let you know how it goes. God bless you for always being selfless and sharing.

  • @LeadershipLadyLive
    @LeadershipLadyLive 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you so much, FUMI! This is the first time that I hears your program and it was FABULOUS!!!!

  • @hlonimohomane5728
    @hlonimohomane5728 2 роки тому +55

    I have re-watched this twice and the gems here are worth it. My abstinence journey has been worth it

  • @EstherAivinhenyi
    @EstherAivinhenyi 2 роки тому +42

    FUMI " is that Cherie?" 😃😃😃😃😂😂😂😂😂😂😊😊😊
    Love your Infectious PERSONALITY! 💝💝💝💝💝

  • @alexisagginie4574
    @alexisagginie4574 2 роки тому +2

    Fumi, I love your clear- headedness!

  • @mummyvee7986
    @mummyvee7986 Рік тому +2

    I love your confidence in talking and transparency. I am a relationship coach, I just love your way of presenting the topics you talked about.
    Thank you. I am learning 💌

  • @user-uz9no2kt2n
    @user-uz9no2kt2n 2 роки тому +10

    I will come to this video whenever I get the glaze cuz Physical intimacy makes me dumb n emotional..loved the story … once u know ur value u feel truly empowered.

  • @NCGrey
    @NCGrey 2 роки тому +27

    I love your openness and honesty! We need to be clear headed so we can see all the red (and green) flags.

  • @amustardseedmovement
    @amustardseedmovement Рік тому +1

    This was wonderful! Thank you for this sister to sister. I’ve abstained for quite some time and just started back in the dating pool. Clear headed is right! And working on all the things I need to. I will keep going as I have. This video was inspiring! Thank you Mrs. Fumi!

  • @Alyson542
    @Alyson542 2 роки тому +3

    Fumi, I love your videos so much!! Everytime I watch them I feel like Im a much wiser woman that I was at the start of the video. Thank you for everything you have taught me 🙏

  • @newdiffrentbetter
    @newdiffrentbetter 2 роки тому +43

    This was the best advice about waiting and the best story about having clarity and knowing your worth enough to even have a little get-back 😏. I loved the description about men being simple and women should be a mystery, I’ve heard it so much but this was the first time it made sense enough to me to actually apply it. THANK YOU 🙌🏽☺️

  • @oktina5944
    @oktina5944 2 роки тому +9

    Love this sister to sister show. You are so right, after getting intimate we get weaker in our decisions, we give more and also expect more or sometimes too much 🤣. Good for the stingy guy, he has learnt his lesson in a bitter way 🤣🤣🤣

  • @lindaegwuonwu3287
    @lindaegwuonwu3287 2 роки тому +4

    Thank you so much ma'am for the blunt truth. I always argued this with my friends that s3x before or after marriage meant nothing if you weren't ready to put in the work after the said marriage. I'll subscribe to your channel immediately because I've always loved relatable and realistic real talks.

  • @treasure2behold282
    @treasure2behold282 2 роки тому

    This is the most eloquent video on this subject. It is true men like to hunt and procreate. I wish I had heard this advice 20 years back. I think knowing each other's heart is t most important. That laugh uplifts me. 🙌

  • @uniquelyme3581
    @uniquelyme3581 2 роки тому +8

    You was good enough to sleep with but not good enough to feed smh. A friend of mine went through something similar and but she didn't take the adult approach you did she took the childish approach and it didn't end well, LOVED the story. Learn ladies it's never too late to learn!

  • @sbusisiwelinshaba7841
    @sbusisiwelinshaba7841 2 роки тому +9

    I love your energy Fumi, you don't beat about the bush, you get straight to the point.

  • @laurawallace9940
    @laurawallace9940 2 роки тому

    These stories are amazing. You are teaching! Love it!