My Experience Being In A Religious Cult
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- Опубліковано 18 вер 2024
- This was obviously a really hard video for me to make. There's a lot I needed to say. There was a lot more TO say as well. There are things I wanted to say but forgot. There are things I didn't even expect I'd say. To anybody who has had religious trauma, I am so sorry. I really hope this video can help people, or at least help people realize they need help. Perhaps people have had a similar experience before. I know there are people who have suffered much worse due to religion. I consider myself to be lucky, and I'm glad that I'm finally free. I am sorry for all the pain I have ever caused anybody. I love you all very much.
- Tyler
Things I forgot to say, but are also important:
1. I remember there was somebody else that was in a similar but "competing" cult to mine. The cult he was taught that "The Bible is the mark of the beast" and in order to be saved, you must first rip up a Bible. By refusing to rip a Bible, it just "proved" that the Bible was the mark of the beast, since nobody was willing to do it, and that if you DO do it, it feels really good! The problem is, is that I remember having this distinct thought, and I want you to really focus on this, because it's extremely important. "My cult is better than his cult." I had actually THOUGHT those words, and used the word cult to describe what I was in! But even so, I was still so very far immersed into the cult that I had no way to get out. I think part of me knew it was a cult but I still relied on them, because they had groomed me.
2. Falling asleep thinking about hell eventually became really relaxing. I actually started to "enjoy" thinking about me suffering for an eternity. It was oddly... comforting. And that is sad.
3. The last thing I told the leader before he died was that he would never hear from me again, and I told him how much he had hurt me. In a way, I feel bad, because I realize he was also sick. But even so, that did not give him the right to hurt many others, and me included.
4. There were... EXTREMELY strange videos circulating around the time I was deluded. These kinds of videos included, but are not limited to, videos of "trumpets" being heard from the sky (there were a lot of these, so people were saying the world was ending). Videos of Nibiru, which is a fictional planet that is said to come close to Earth and destroy our planet. And other... very creepy stuff. But it is only creepy because of how delusional some people are, and how I was among them.
5. I do not regret what happened. I am glad that I am stronger now because of it.
6. Anybody can fall into a cult. I did.
7. I 100% forgive my old friend. I mention it because there are important lessons, and it also shows how destructive OCD was to me. Also, this was NOT the same friend that said that OCD wasn't debilitating. This was a separate person.
Suicide hotline: 988
Recovering from religion: 844-368-2848
RAINN (National Sexual Assault Hotline): 800-656-HOPE (4673)
I don’t know why this video doesn’t have a million views because it’s great. You’re very brave for admitting all of that. You are very awesome ❤️
Thank you very much! I’m already shocked by the comments, and I appreciate them very much. Thank you again.
Very admirable of you to make this video. I remember out talks and how deep in thought you were. Sadly thoughts that were eating you on the daily. Back then I was meeker and I wish I had said "Get some help" but in the end I don't even know if it was my place to ever say that and heck, I suppose we had similar worries. However, I can't begin to express how happy I am to hear you are reclaiming your life. Your own happiness.
I'm so glad this came to my recommended. I am so sorry this happened to you, I'm a Christian, and I know what the bible says. Those people are monsters for doing this, I can't even imagine what you went through. Sin isn't the end all be all of Christianity, it's just faith. I swear like a sailor, and I engage in sin. That's all part of life. I respect your choices and beliefs, but that doesn't mean that it hurts any less to see someone hurt by people masquerading as Christians. Unless they were actually schizophrenic, I believe they were being malicious. Best of luck to you man, but if you ever decide to look into any sort of Christianity again, only trust what a bible says. People can always push misinterpretations rather they mean to or not. I'm glad you found the courage to speak your truth.
Thank you so, so much.
Well this is not the video I expected today, I can see why it was such a hard video to make. I'm a Christian, and I'm sorry you had to go through so much pain, especially caused by cultists claiming to be 'Christian'. I'm glad you were able to move past it and I hope your story can help others going through something similar. I'm just a random guy on the internet and I don't expect this to be the case, but if you ever want to talk with me about God, I'd love to have a conversation. Best of wishes!
Man, you beat me to saying the same thing. I just wanted to finish watching the video before I said anything.
Thank you so much. Yeah, it was definitely very hard for me to make, but I’m glad I did. Thank you for your continued support!