First Day Alone - Stage 4 Lung Cancer
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- Опубліковано 10 січ 2023
- P.O. Box
Jenny Appleford
7211 Haven Ave, Unit E-407
Rancho Cucamonga, CA 91701
INSTAGRAM: jenny_appleford
FACEBOOK: Our Brave Jenny
For business inquiries: veganapplefords@gmail.com
DIAGNOSIS:
March 19th, 2021 Stage IIIA Non Small Cell Lung Cancer (Non-Smoking)
February 2022 Stage IV Non Small Cell Lung Cancer (spreading to Brain, and other parts of lung and lymph nodes)
Gene Mutation EGFR with Exon 20 Insertion
TREATMENTS: Received or currently Receiving
2021: 8 Rounds of Chemotherapy (Carboplatin and Paclitaxel) with 30 concurrent radiation treatments to chest and lung
Failed Immunotherapy directly after Chemo and Radiation (Durvalumab, 1 round)
2022: Chemotherapy
10 rounds of Chemotherapy (Carboplatin, Alimta, and Avastin)
6 with Carboplatin, 4 without
Targeted Brain Radiation (Completed)
CURRENT TREATMENT:
I am on a clinical trial for my specific gene mutation
Our GoFundMe Link:
gofund.me/5edf81e5
The purpose of my channel is to document my cancer journey to look back on, and/or help anyone else going through anything similar. It is also to potentially help loved ones supporting those who are in this fight as well. This is also an easy way to update a lot of people at once. My main goal is to have footage of this journey for my husband and children to look back on. I originally created this channel as a sort of video diary for my
family.
Thank you so much for following along on this journey. Your love and support help me so much.
Just getting a daily dose of Jenny. Oh How we miss you dearly.
Can I just say as a relatively healthy person, I felt EXHAUSTED just watching the time lapse video of you and Winnie! Jenny you killed your first day! Play doh, painting, coloring, playing with the dollhouse, reading, getting ready, doing hair, fixing meals…. GOOD LORD! Cancer or not, you are anything but lazy. I’m sure the kids didn’t mean it in a malicious way, prob just teasing. You got this!
Ps- had to edit because I forgot you went to go get Ellis, after school snacks, then more play doh, more painting, and I’m sure there’s more we didn’t even see. You’re amazing and we all see it! Give yourself a pat on the back. Sending so much love your way! Sorry for the long comment 😬 lol
Most stay at home moms don’t play with their children all day! You need to give yourself some slack❤. Take one day at a time…..or better yet one hour at a time! Your kids are to sweet to hurt your feelings on purpose, you and Kyle are bringing them up with love! ❤️
I second that!!! Lol You killed it Jenny! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Same. Go Jenny!!!
Agreed!!!! When my children were young I was exhausted being a healthy mom, I can't imagine how you must feel. You're doing amazing!!
Awesome comments! Right on! Thank you for that. Jenny really needed to hear that
I’m battling breast cancer and at 56 I worry about being viewed as lazy. Or using the cancer card. And I don’t have young kids. So you just give yourself a break.
No you’re not lazy hon. The body needs that rest too heal
😢 NO ONE should ever be made to feel guilty about anything when undergoing treatment for anything!!! Don't let it get to you...💕
I’m a stage 3 and it’s my 3rd time in 11 years. This fight has been rough.
@SuzyThurman-Oberholtz
Please don't worry about people thinking your lazy. That is the least thing you should be worried about! All you need to worry about is getting stronger, and better nothing else!
I am so sorry for all of you battling this horrible disease. I will pray for all of you.
Children have this uncanny ability to act as a mirror, often reflecting back to us our own insecurities. I admire how you explain to them what you are going through. You are raising more empathetic children with every thoughtful response.
This is very true! And her kids have such empathy learned from their parents I just know explaining helped them understand!
@@solangelalebron1348whaaaaast???? 😂 mental gymnastics …
Oh Jenny, hug for your tears. You did an amazing job! Proud of your strength! One day the kids will be adults and they will only see how hard you fought this fight. They’ll see your strength and try to be just as strong in their own lives. Most of all, you’ve shown them love which will never leave them. You’ve got this, Mama❤
Rest in peace beautiful Jenny 💔
The kids need to know that they need to entertain themselves sometimes, that you can’t spend every moment with them as you need to rest and sometimes do other things. I’m sure they won’t think you are lazy ❤. You did great on your first day on your own!
I think it is healthy for all kids to learn to entertain themselves some throughout the day. You are doing great Mom!!
Jenny the tears are rolling down my face. I just want to say you are an amazing mom. It’s so bazaar the strength you find when all you want to do is rest. Don’t ever doubt your job as a Mom. Your amazing. I wish I could just hug you and tell you we are here for you. God Bless you!
Agree
BIZARRE ... not bazaar
Jenny did the best job on everyone's hair, she had the magic touch!!!! Oh Jenny, if I had a 1/4th of your strength...I miss you!!❤🕊
Before you shared the comment that inadvertently hurt your feelings, I was thinking how actively engaged you were with the kids. They should both be able to self-engage without parent involvement for periods of time-even if you didn't have the exhaustion from your treatment. So don't feel guilty for taking time for yourself, to rest or otherwise. You're doing amazing, sending ❤.
The children don't understand it all but in years to come they will. You handled it in the right way explaining the reasons you can't play long periods at a time. You and Kyle are amazing parents and even if you were not sick mothering is a FULL time job!! Sending prayers and hugs your way!!
That's what I said too!
You are NOT lazy and your child probably did not have the same concept as an adult. You are an exceptionally wonderful Momma.
Jenny, my kids said things like that when they were young, and I had no excuse. Please don't take it personally. I think the fact they said that shows that they just see you as mom, not sick mom, which reveals what an amazing job you have done even through all your treatments!
I agree 100%. It's just the way kids are ... adults would be ordering her to rest during the day.
I also agree. They are young but reminding them to be extra helpful n kind when mommy Needs to sit n take a break.
Very well said
This is spot on I also think they see her as normal mom not sick!!! Such a good point skyluv
This is spot on. A mom sat down for a minute imagine that. 😂😂
We are proud of you. I am lifting you and your entire family up in prayer and yes along with others leaving comments, we are holding your hands
Kids can be brutally honest and will mature and learn to be empathetic in time. I’m glad you told them that they hurt your feelings. My two year old granddaughter tells me I’m mean when I don’t do what she wants, need time to rest or any number of things. She is still learning as are your kids. Stay strong! 🥰
Going through some of your older videos well they're not that old . You are the best person ever . When you cry I get upset and cry too.inwonet if I could be as brave and beautiful as you...I've never felt so much feelings for someone I don't even no. It's just not fair what you have to go through .🙏🍀🍀🍀
First Day ✔️ Made it through with strength and courage ✔️ Amazing mom ✔️Amazing wife ✔️Amazing person✔️Cancer Warrior✔️ seems to me you are truly a fighter, a very loving and kind mom, who is doing her best with what she’s been dealt. You rocked 🎉your first day! Way to Go! 💖..I think as the days go on you will slip into a pattern that will work for you..hang in there Jenny! Sending hugs and love your way! 🤗💗🙏🏻
Awww so well said we all totally agree with you. 👍🏼
❤
I just want you to know that most stay at home moms do not entertain their kids all day. I would find some activities that they can do alone, like puzzles, building blocks, or a board game. Maybe you could ask your son to read a book while you rest on the couch. As a child, I remember playing in my room with my dolls for hours and my mom didn't have to play with me. Put some childrens music on and let them sing to you. You could do some things with them, but I would not play all day. If you really need a break, put on a good Disney movie for them at the end of the day. You made me tired just watching the video. I'm glad my kids didn't expect that from me.
Tell them you are sitting there absorbing how amazing they are and how wonderful it is just to sit and look at them. That’s what you are doing. They do not actually need you as a playmate but as a loving mom
Your UA-cam family is sending you some love and support. You can do this Jenny!
So glad you have all your Jenny Angels there to support you n always encouraging you n mostly praying for you for full recovery 🙏🏼
Don’t forget that ok
Your UA-cam supporters are “Jenny’s Angels” always there ❤
Your children are old enough to play well on their own and together. You should not have to be with them 24/7. Tell them they can nap with you if they want. Lay down and rest when ever you need!
Oh Jenny, I LOVE how you explained to your kids why you get tired--kids understand so much more than we think, so being honest with them is so important!! Wow, what a fun day it looked like you were having with them--so many fun activities!!!! You did great; I hope you sleep well!! Way to go Jenny!!!!💛💛💛💛
I’m so sorry Jenny you’re feeling sad because of one of your kid’s remark
Kids say many things they don’t even know what it means 🌻
You have lovely kids who are very well taken care of and you are both amazing parents by all standards. You really don’t need to worry about being labeled lazy because you are not one ❤️
They will not view you as lazy, ever. It’s the opposite. They will know how hard you fought and how much effort you put into ensuring they’d grow up as healthy as possible despite the circumstances. So much admiration for you. ❤️
I completely agree.
Awe, I’m sorry they hurt your feelings. Let it go…they don’t understand. You did a great job today! ❤️🙏🏻
You got this girl. Recharge when you need to and don't feel bad about doing it. Pace yourself and be proud about what a good mommy and wife you are. They love how tuff you are.
Honey girl, I was exhausted just watching all you did today. I remember those small kid days and even coloring and playing play doh and dollhouses is a lot. Having to be constantly engaged and keeping little humans busy is so hard. My suggestion is, if it fits into the budget, get a college girl to come in and do some playing. You will be there and once the trust builds you can take a nap if you need to. Have her stay just an hour maybe two and just help not do it all. If you get too run down it’s not going to help you at all. I’m sorry your little one said what they said. Especially since it was a trigger for you. That was harsh. Out of the mouths of babes…I wish we were neighbors. I’d be there in a hot minute! ❤
Great idea.
I agree!! It would be great have a college girl help out due her being tired with treatments.
@@meowch2664I agree. I was a single parent, my child played by herself. I didn’t have much time to be her playmate. When she said I’m bored, I said “if you’re bored I have some chores for you to do. “
@Meowch Absolutely agree... being home with your children 24/7 is a blessing for you and your children! Make a nice dinner for the family.... get the kids involved in it too (children love helping out!) Geez...
Awe Jenny you were smashing it. Kicking cancers butt 🤍🤍🤍🤍
You inspire me to be a better mommy.
Oh Jenny. It’s ok to let them entertain themselves for awhile. Please don’t be so hard on yourself!
I don't know you however
Praise to you & your family at 63 I was diagnosed with stage 2 lung cancer & I just finished up with the radiation treatment I'll know more in 3 months. If there is one thing I incorporated when someone leaves it is toodles or see ya later never good bye even to strangers lol.
May God give you the strength you need & deserve and always think positive 😊.
As others have said, I’m not even dealing with cancer and watching you was exhausting!! I’m a SAHM who homeschools and you better believe I take time to sit down during the day too!! There is no way I could just go non stop!! Hugs
Thank you for your honesty. When others (including the kids and other close ones) can't see your illness, they don't always "remember" the exhaustion it causes. I have MS and have similar experiences. When I was, in the past during a relapse, unable to walk, everyone remembered that I'm ill. Now that there's no visual reminder like wheelchair, I sometimes feel people don't remember that my MS causes fatigue. You also look ablebodied and fine, even though you have exhaustion from cancer & treatment. You did well on your first day!
The kids are still younger, and really have no comprehension of the depth of your sickness and struggle. You are doing great. The only thing I would add, is to bring in free play, without needing a parent literally participating, and/ or a picked tv program which would give you a break, and have the kids start participating in helping out, small things like setting out dishes, cleanup, just little things to start teaching them how to help out, it will help you, and it's good for them.
Flower is so precious missing her daddy she loves Daddy and Daddy loves her ❤
Jenny, know that you are not lazy. You are a warrior in a huge health battle. The kids need to cut you some slack. Don’t overdo it, take breaks and give yourself grace. You’ve got this. ❤❤❤
Please know that you are not lazy!!!Your children are old enough to entertain themselves now and again. There are. A lot of things that go with stay at home parents. You got this
Kyle is one man in a million and I'm so happy that you have him to take care of you, the kids and flower🙏👏.
Agreed. Kyle is AMAZING!
Hi dear. Your kids are spoiled having dad home for 8 months. They tell the truth and thats better than supressing feelings. The blog prooves all the fun you did. You will make new memories when your better. God Bless. Btw, I never played as much as you do with your kids. Your a super mom. Let them play alone, all kids should be able to enjoy that!
Love how you handled making them accountable for what they said and respecting your feelings and teaching empathy. ❤️ I also wonder if maybe the kiddo completely understood why you were taking a rest and they were scared and so lashed out. I have vivid memories of my own childhood around adults with big scary health problems and how I would sometimes say things that weren't at all what I was feeling and would just come as selfish or angry. Just my two cents. Great job on your first day alone! You're a courageous warrior!!❤️
Wow Kyle must work with excellent people, his co-workers should be rewarded! 8 months off!!! Whoa
Your Timelapse of your morning with Winnie reminded me how time intensive a stay -at-home’ mom is. The reward is the bonding… but I was exhausted remembering those days.
Awwww Jenny, you are an amazing mom! To feel worried about them thinking you are lazy during treatment is so sweet! It shows a level of EQ, emotional Quotient, that not many people have. No matter what we do as moms and dads, until our kiddos are moms and dads, they can’t possibly understand the role and all it entails. Combine that with sickness and treatment, you have more than most can comprehend, especially kids! You got this girl…you did great today! And Kyle, you got this too! Going to work when a loved one is sick at home is horrible! Bravo to you both!🥰
I can’t believe she is not with us anymore 😥such a beautiful women and loving mother , life is so unfair sometimes ❤ rest in peace Jennie, now you are free from your pain and your sickness, in a way you can say you beat the cancer , when you left this world the cancer always went away , so it’s a win . You did it
Sweet Jenny. I wanted to come thru the screen and give you a big hug.! I've been in that same situation when my feelings got hurt.
It's important that u explained to them that they hurt your feelings, even tho we all know it wasn't meant to hurt you.
ALWAYS remember that you are far from lazy honey, and everyone knows that!
You did a fantastic job. Hope your shower was relaxing and that you slept well and pain free!❤
I miss you Jenny 😢❤. I’m however so sooo grateful you left these amazing lovely videos and your legacy to look back upon …… I love you signature sign off of yours! Xo from Oregon
Can ❤on,y reply…..bless her heart
Winnie should be in a preschool program, she is a big girl. Children are the cruelest creatures on earth. You need mommy time as well. When a six-year-old makes you cry because he has a mean mouth he needs to sit in time out, plain and simple. And Jenny you need thicker skin when raising children believe me. Who cares if your kids thinks your lazy again what matters is what you think and you do your best. They have programs where someone comes to your home to help out, and people learning to become caregivers.
Jenny , you can do it! Just take breaks
Ellis treats his sister so nicely!
Rest in peace sweet Jenny 🙏😢 May God hold your sweet family close in His arms.
Good job Jenny! Prayers for you 🙏
You’ve got this! 💕
Day is done and you more than survived ! Great news. I know you already know this....Kyle and your kids are so great. Keep on keeping on. Love to all.
Your amazing Jenny! You did a great job! ❤
So very proud of you Jenny! ❤ I love you!
You did fantastic! Love to you and your family, Jenny!!
Jenny, looking after a little ones is exhausting enough! Having cancer treatments on top of it is almost too much!!
I completely understand the guilt you feel when your children don’t seem to understand when you’re not well. When I was going through chemotherapy, I was determined to take my son to the park. We probably got a quarter there and I just couldn’t do it. I actually sat down on the grass by the side of the road because I was so sick from treatment. My husband had to help me home. I felt so incredibly guilty, and I could see my son was disappointed. We ended up resting for a bit and took a car ride to get ice cream.
It was so hard for me to admit that I wasn’t strong enough at that time to walk to the park.
Take things one day at a time because you’re doing an amazing job!❤❤❤
Jenny you did AMAZING!!
Praying for you ❤️
You did amazing! Feel proud of yourself and tears are ok! You got this❤️
Hey, we are here. You are never alone
Hi Jenny ,so proud of you !! Praying for you !! Love Lillian 🌹
You did wonderfully!!! It will ease up as the days go by! Praying for you! You are an awesome mom!!!
Jenny, you are amazing!!! Big hug from Germany!!!
You’ve done brilliant, it’s been a full day for you all. x
Ohhhh Jenny, kids can say things that come out without thinking, they prob forgot you have cancer, but know your children love you and sometimes they probably don't fully understand. You explained to them how you felt and they understood. Communication is key...... You can do this, and once a routine begins, things will hopefully get better.
It is good you explained it to them. They're babies, it's part of learning the hard way and we are part of that unfortunately. Maybe remind them that although you are a grown up, your body isn't working as well as theirs so you get more tired.
They are very smart kids, just reminding them that ur body is still sick so u need extra help from them to get better faster. But to be nice ,when mommy has to sit remember it’s cause you’re trying really hard to get better need extra strength. Cause now daddy has to be at work ,mommy is now home alone. And they have to be helping too by understanding mommy needs breaks but mommy is getting better everyday.
They have empathy n are caring n kind spirited Thought by their mommy n daddy
You’re awesome Jenny, it will get better.back into the routine before u know it. ❤
Taught by you sorry
I am glad you told them they hurt your feelings. This is the way kids learn that what they do and say have consequences. Good first day. Maybe Winnie needs 1/2 day in a school for her age kids. She can get all the activities you have to do with her done at school and you can putter around doing little chores or just plain napping if needed. Little kids are exhausting, they never stop needing something or stop talking. It is hard. You do way more with them than I did when mine were little. Hope tomorrow is better.
you're amazing, you're strong and youre here! you got this!❤❤❤❤
Jenny you are a trooper! God bless you. ❤❤❤
You’re such a good person and a wonderful mom. ❤
I'm so in love with flower!!! Good job Jenny... you are so amazing!! 💕
Your doing great Jenny,hugs and prayers 😊🤗🙏🏼
Jenny you did great your first day. 😊 I’m praying for you and sending love and all my positive energy ❤
Praying for you and your beautiful family, rooting for you !!🤲🏻💪♥️
You are doing awesome! Take your breaks don’t feel guilty! You got this! Take one day at a time! I’ll keep you in my prayers!
Well done Jenny! You did amazing and that is one very happy looking family.
You can do it. I’m so proud of you.
Praying for you and your family, your journey is inspirational to many! Wishing you the best.
You’re the mom I wish to be like if I ever have kids. 💙
Give yourself grace Jenn. You are a rock star..🎉❤
Bless your heart. Jenny you did absolutely wonderful. Sending a big hug your way 🤗
My ma got sick in her early 30's...when I was a small kid...
Raised me completely alone as a single mum...
No help from friends or family...
(Everyone works full time)
She could barely function...
She feels guilty cause I missed out on things like karate, fishing n Disneyland cause she was so sick. (We don't live near Disneyland...it's just something we always wanted to do..)
The drs didn't take her seriously and she thought she was goin crazy cause they always told her there was nuthin wrong with her.
Then almost 5 years ago they accidentally (long story) discovered her cancer. She'd lived with it for over a decade and was told there was nuthin wrong with her.
She always did her best, but still feels guilty. I tell her not to. She's been the best mum she could be.
She's now in her 50's and stays in bed most the time.
I help care for her...and I'm a substitute teacher.
Being a mum with cancer is possible. Don't beat yourself up. She did it totally by herself...and I turned out all right. 🤪🥸
♥️👏♥️
A hug for you , you really did amazingly well xx
Jenny we love you ! And guess what? You are the best mom ever ! Ignore the negative people 🤗
You are a trouper and doing all you can. All the best.
Your strong 💪🏼 and so brave 😊stay positive ❤️🙏🏼
Well done, Jenny. Today was so successful in so many ways. I’m thrilled that Kyle had the opportunity to go back to work. I’m certain he was sending his love every minute, but he’s got so much love to share as a Special Needs Teacher. Here’s hoping the warm shower acted as a sedative and that your family of four had a great nite’s rest.
Jenny you are amazing praying for you from N. Ireland.
Well done you did it a very emotional day for the family
& exhausting as well
Awww so sorry your having to go through any of this..... its got to be so hard, but you did great you got this. Much love ❤️
We are all behind you holding your hands you got this Jen. Believe in yourself you are strong 💪 and fearless .
Love Jan 👵🇬🇧xx
Praying for energy and strength for you. And flowers 🌸 adorable!
What a wonderful Mummy.❤
YOU are a VERY brave woman!
Jenny give yourself some grace hun, you did great! You got this 💪🏻💪🏻❤❤
It was so sweet watching you do both your guys hair for them. ❤
You did absolutely amazing considering the circumstances You GO GIRL IAM ROOTING FOR YOU
So much love to you and your beautiful family ❤
Hi Jenny, glad your treatment is working. You should be happy about that and try to stop smothering Kyle. He eventually will wear down. He needs encouragement also as the caregiver also 😊
Agree! Kyle loves his family...and, his job as a “special ed teacher” 👏
Awww it's ok jenny it's just all new and over whelming. Prayers hugs love
Oh sweet Jenny we miss you
Each day will get easier as you guys find your groove. You and winnie are so lucky to have each day together.