Any girl who called her ugly most have some self esteem issues as well. Jackie is one of the most beautiful and sweet girl I've seen on UA-cam ❤️ You can never know someone's true struggles. Love you Jackie
You are so brave, so spiritually beautiful, so strong and such a genuine inspiration for opening up like this (even though you completely didn't have to, and thank you for feeling able to share this very painful and traumatising series of events and feelings with us). I truly truly truly hope that life gives you all the best that it can offer because you DESERVE it, and even though we don't know each other personally I have so much respect and admiration for you and I am sending you so so so much positivity and hope and happiness!!! xxx
Thank you so much, I cried reading this comment when I first uploaded this video because you are so incredibly kind. Thank you for always being so lovely to me, I love your creativity & seeing your posts on insta too
This is so comforting. I was diagnosed with episodic depression and body dysmorphia 5 months ago and I’m at the bottom of a deep hole. I’ll get out of it, I know I will, but right now I’m having a tough time. Seeing someone who seems perfect online open up about their experiences and dark moments makes me so happy. Not because I enjoy hearing other people’s pain, but because it makes me realise that not everything is as polished as it seems whilst I’m falling apart. Human connection and communication is priceless - it’s what we live for and it’s beautiful. You’re the best Jackie :)
hi, i just wanted to say i'm really proud of you. i know what depression is like and i'm so sorry that you have to deal with that. you're in my thoughts, i'm wishing you good luck and crossed fingers
When you are older and you look back at that time, you will think that these days made you stronger! And it sounds weird, but every path, whether good or bad, leads to something new and something better! Just stay strong, everything will be fine! ❤️
You’re so relatable. I love your raw honesty. If you lived closer I would love to be friends with someone like you! Genuine people are hard to find. Feel better!!
I'm SO happy to hear that you've accepted yourself now, and that things are looking up for you. I feel like I've grown up with you, since I've been watching you for so long. (Since 2014, I'm 24, will be 25 in December), so I'm really proud of you for sharing such an honest inspirational story with us 💜
Oh my gosh I feel like this video was so self healing for me because I have gone through something so extremely similar and I have never been able to really replace my soul friend either so I totally get the tense feeling and the insecurities about second guessing who you are. Thank you Jackie!! This hit home 💕
I’ve been watching your videos probably around 2012-2013 because I was actually at a low point too and UA-cam/your videos were like an escape for me. It’s sad to think that you were feeling low too when your videos were cheering me up. I totally related to everything you talked about and I really appreciate that you posted this - it reminded me that we all make mistakes and to just focus on how far we’ve come. I’m lucky in that I’m doing a second degree at a different uni so I kind got a second chance at this whole fun uni life but with the lessons I learned from the shit experiences the first time around. Happy to report that finding genuinely good friends really does make a difference. Also not to be weird, but I’m from north of Toronto too and back when I had insta, I think I remember seeing that we knew some of the same people. For what it’s worth, if we had gone to the same school or run in the same circles, I would have totally been your friend! I feel like we’re so similar. I hope New York treats you well. Keep taking good care of yourself 💕
I'm so glad you get a second chance at the uni life!! have a great time girl and YES to good friends... really does make all the difference. no way!! small world
Thank you so much for this video. My highschool and university years were bad for almost the same reasons. You made me feel much better about it, knowing that i'm not alone. I'm usually the person that understands everyone and would sit and listen to whatever they wanna say and never judge them, but i've never found anyone that would do the same with me
Starting back at college this week and this video just...felt like something I needed to hear. All the love and support to you Jackie for opening up like this and saying how even now you are still working through things
Dear Jackie ❤︎ I have been on your channel since 2013. I have never seen you this honest and open about how you really feel and felt back then. It's touching and very brave to open up to us like this. I hope you find peace in your own skin. I'm sure this video is helpfull to others because you are surely not alone. Big hug x
To all the young people out there please, please listen to her when she says you can’t go through the motions of a relationship and expect it to work. You need to take time for yourself and you can’t do that with another person. Sometimes that takes years and that’s ok, your worth it and your good enough to love yourself.
Last year was rough for me, but I found an escape in beauty and hair. Your channel was a huge inspiration for me and you have taught me so much. I get very excited whenever you upload, and I'm glad that this helped you. I started crying when you said that you are starting to love yourself now because that made me very happy and is very important. Thank you for everything you have done for me and many other people who are inspired by not just your work but you everyday.
We are here for you, no matter what. I just want you to know that here you have many people who admires you and who just want you to be fine. This video is very helpful, because you are telling people that they are not alone, we love you, thank you for doing this.
I feel for what you went through so much. Pop culture is the same kind of escape for you as for me: forgetting about yourself and your life and living another one. It's really hard but it means you still want to live, just not that situation. But things do change and it depends on us to some extent to change them in a way that brings us closer to a life we want. Little by little, internally and externally, we can change ourselves and our worlds to fit us better. I hope we can all get to good places, and greater from there one day soon. All the best, Jackie! ♡
I have watched your videos for so long! We’re the same age and I would always put your videos on while I got ready because it felt like I was getting ready with a friend ❤️ I’m so sorry you went through so much pain all those years. Being vulnerable like this takes so much courage. Remember you have friends all across the world rooting for you to succeed and who are looking up to you! Thank you :)
I am glad you are realizing that feeling confident has a lot to do with mistakes people make. If you feel low or down, always seek your parents (if you have a good relationship with them), if not seek a psychologist and/or a close relative whom you trust, but always pray to God. Don't try to please everyone else, because that's when you get in trouble. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND TALENTED AND WILL GO ALONG WAY, IF YOU FOLLOW YOUR HEART ALWAYS. I WISH YOU THE BEST. YOU ARE MY FAVORITE MERMAID COSPLAYER :) GET OUT TO TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS, STOP JUMPING IN ANOTHER MAN'S HANDS. BE YOURSELF AND LEARN TO ACCEPT YOURSELF AS YOU ARE AND THAT IS GOOD ENOUGH. THINK OF YOUR FUTURE AS A PARENT TO BE, WHAT AND HOW YOU WANT YOUR CHILD TO BE AND JUST REMEMBER. GOD LOVES YOU.
Wow Jackie! Stay Strong! Thank you for sharing your personal life with us! You’re not alone! Many people, myself included had the same experience! Life is beautiful! Sometimes it’s hard to fight those negative thoughts but you’re beautiful and so is life!
I’m so sorry Jackie. I never would have expected this. As long as you learn from your mistakes it will make you stronger. Keep moving forward you have a bright future and you’re a beautiful girl! Stay safe and remember your worth.
I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through Jackie. It’s so brave of you to open up to your UA-cam community and talk about things that were traumatic for you. I know it’s not easy to talk about them, but allowing yourself to open up and talk about them publicly really shows how strong of a woman you are! I’ve been watching your channel since the beginning and the person you are on the inside is just as beautiful as the person you are on the outside.
Thanks so much for sharing Jackie! This is so important for other people to hear, it can help them if they’re going through something similar 💕 this video is very well spoken and put together. I’m sorry you’ve had these things happen to you. You are a kind soul, much love.
I have been following you in UA-cam since 2012, me and my younger sister discovered you through your Almost Lover cover. You are my favorite UA-camr because your content are always meticulous, useful, and inspiring. I am sorry to learn that all those years have been tumultuous to you. I hope you would feel how genuinely grateful I am to you. Though you may not know me personally, I think of you as a friend (I am also born '95) as I witness bits and pieces of your life since then. I suffered burn out in 2017 that escalated to cripling depression in 2018. I feel suffocated in uni and I just want to escape and I depended on vices which are sleeping and reading fiction, and just whatever random distraction so I wouldn't have to deal with my actual situation. I became too comfortable that I become complacent and it came to a point that I couldn't function properly anymore. I became socially awkward, I keep missing classes, I failed subjects, I dismissed proper hygeine, I would binge read and oversleep but it's getting better now. In your London vlog you also talked about feeling low. I truly believe this year is our healing. Let's keep fighting and striving! All the best to a new chapter in you life. Love you Jackie, we'll always be here to support you so go girl! 💕x
Thank you for sharing . My high school experience was shit too. That made me feel a bit better about where I am now. You can’t change things overnight.
This broke my heart, i can seriously relate in some level. i'm glad youre better and doing well, you deserve the best! I know this won't happen but if you need anything or talk to somebody we are always gonna be here, at least i'm always gonna be here for you, i have watched your videos for so long and we never spect anything, stay strong, you are beautiful inside and out! love u xx!!
This is such an incredibly refreshing video and I am so grateful that you opened up to us. I have watched you for years and it is so incredibly freeing to hear you share your journey. You're so relatable and raw and genuine. We love you Jackie
I love you Jackie. (we actually know each other) I do know you and you have a beautiful heart. I can relate. Alot of people think when you are pretty you don't have problems but that is far from the truth. Sometimes your really lonely because people have an image of you. I'm so glad that you told your story. I will always love you.
Jackie - you spoke to me on a really personal level. Our stories appear very similar and I feel so haunted by my mistakes and the trauma I can’t recover from - all because I was so desperate to feel love and attention :( love you
Literally you are one of the most talented, brilliant, and beautiful people on UA-cam. You have such a bright spirit and it makes me so sad that you’ve went through this. You’re so strong and brave for posting this and you’ve helped more than you think. Love you Jackie ! 💗💗💗
It’s takes a lot of courage to talk about hard things we go through because it’s like you have to relive them. I’m so glad that you shared this because I know that I and so many other people can relate to your experiences. So happy that you have opened up and it’s refreshing to see The behind the scenes Jackie and you’re so inspiring.💗💛 love you and your videos soo much!!!
Jackie, that was so inspiring and beautiful. We are always trying to find ourselves and sometimes It's ok to get lost, take time to heal and comeback stronger. Thank you for sharing your journey, I lost my best friend 6 years ago over some stupid fight and even thought we worked things out, our friendship never was the same again and I miss that so much, having someone to talk about and tell her how my day was. I love your vídeos because despite not knowing eachother I feel we are friends and I can relate with you con so many levels. You're a beautiful soul, keep being honest and brave, the world needs more people like you right now. Kisses from Venezuela.
I’m so glad you are still here with us! I’ve struggled depression/suicidal thoughts for years and am thankfully better now. Please reach out if you ever need someone to talk to! No judgments, just open ears and support 💕
yep definitely relate to losing the best friends in high school, i was strangely popular if you will, or simply had a lot of friends in middle school. then we all did move to the same high school but none of us were in the same classes whatsoever and everyone got new friends and i got depression soon after. my mum thinks thats what caused it. in sixth form after high school i did ofc make new friends sure but everyone went to uni now and i didn’t, my friends slowly stopped talking to me and thats where im at now.
Jackie Vlogs yeah im just not to sure where to start! i have internet friends of course, that i have also met but yknow thats not exactly the best option bc they live so far away! love u too
Every time i've watched your videos, i thought she is definitely someone who cares about herself, and even thought she is such a lovely girl and will probably be a great parent one day who can teach every kind of hair styling to her daughter :)) Please try to see your worth like we do. You are a lady and don't let anyone treat you less, even including yourself.
This really touched me. It’s nice seeing this more honest side of you. It’s crazy how the teenage years can be so definitive. Honestly stuff that I did way back in middle school is still affecting my life at 19. Be careful who you let in, and just sit back and always think twice before you do something
It was amazing that you were this brave to open up what your life really was.we all have difficulties and mistakes but when you go to sacial media it breaks you more.bc it seems that every other person has the best time and is so high. But I appreciate it that you told your story honestly and revealed your lonely innocent soul that makes mistakes and faces difficulties. I really love you✨❤️
I'm so glad I watched this video! I have been through a lot of really similar situations to what you described. I also had a regrettably wild phase in college and for a while afterward, and I was also in an emotionally abusive, highly toxic yet codependent relationship in which I was cheated on. I am still processing the trauma that it caused me nearly a year after escaping said relationship, and I still have frequent panic attacks and am often triggered and haunted by memories of it. I am glad I am not alone, and know that you are not alone, either! I also try to deal with anxiety by doing my makeup because I find it calming, enjoyable, and fulfilling. Thank you for sharing your story, Jackie. I love you and your videos!
It's like listening to something very similar to my past. Ugh I wish we could be friends. I'm in PA so closer than LA haha but you are NOT alone. You're beautiful and deserve so much. That is all
Jackie, I have been watching you for a very long time and this video broke my heart because I'm 23 and I can totally relate to you. Honestly I would've never guessed any of that happened to you but I want you to know you are brave and strong. Lots of people don't make it out and you did, remember that. Thank you for being vulnerable even tho you have been turned away so much. That just shows strength.
I remember in one of your old Q&As you said in response I believe to someone asking how you stay positive or deal with feeling bad etc. And you said that when you were filming you were often feeling the lowest. This really stuck with me, and helped/helps me when I feel low too I push all that energy into something productive and distracting and I don’t think I would’ve done half the things I have done if I didn’t do that. I’ve watched you since I was 18 and have been in awe of your creativity and skills and I just want to say thank you for turning your lowest moments into something that helps others. It takes a really special person to do that. I’m sorry to hear about how bad things got for you and hope you love New York ❤️
Girly I love you!!! This video helped me realize how cut off I had been from other people. I haven't felt like I had that many friends that I had deep relationships with, or that made me particularly happy. But I remembered that the best way to have good friends is to be a good friend. I have noticed people at school by themselves, people who may not have friends in a class, or maybe people who just seem to have a weight in their eyes, and my first response is to say hi, but then there is always that nagging voice that tries to tell me that it isn't worth it, that they are fine, and I can't make a difference. But just being nice to a person isn't signing away my soul! Who cares if they think I'm weird, that's their deal, and if they honestly want to be alone that's also fine. But as someone who knows what it's like to be alone, I feel like no one should have to be, especially when I can brighten their day just by smiling, saying hi, or trying to get to know more about them. Anyway this video really just inspired me to take more courage in those social situations, and try to just be a little better. Thank you, girl you are brave and bright and beautiful. No matter how low we sink, there is a way out, and no matter how much of our pure inner worth seems to be lost, it never truly goes away, it can be forgotten, but not lost.
You have no idea how much I needed this video. Thank you for sharing your story to help others! 💕 I’m on the same journey as you right now and it’s so nice to know that I’m not alone in it all! I’m rooting for you and I hope you continue to grow into the best version of yourself 💕 I pray that life brings you all the happiness and joy you deserve!
Dear Jackie, I love all your videos. The content and tutorials are spectacular. I think the worst part of being in your 20's and late teens is that you somehow feel like everything is your fault "If only, i was smarter. Or I should have known better." It took me a long time to realize, "I did the best I could with the information I had and the feelings, I was feeling." Please don't blame yourself for your past. They made you into this incredible, innovative, artistic, sensitive person. I hope New York treats you well. Can't wait for the next video!
I have always loved watching your makeup and hair videos and thought you were beautiful and had the perfect life in perfect and scenic Canada (fairytale setting), but hearing about your experience makes me love you as a person. I relate to your story more than I care to admit because I am also very ashamed of some of my past actions because I just wanted someone to care and love me and see me. I get you. Thanks for sharing your experience. It takes a lot of strength and bravery to be this vulnerable and open.
Let go Jackie. Mistakes happen and I know they’re not things to be proud of, but trust me, those mistakes don’t define us. I can see that you were hard on yourself and I can relate to that aspect. But the minute you acknowledge that it’s in the past and shift your attention on you “today,” is the minute you start to love yourself more and blossom. Forgive, and let go ♥️
I so admire your honesty and telling how much you have over come, You are so strong and I fully support you, you are an inspiration Jackie and how exciting your fresh new journey of moving to New York will be i wish you nothing but positive energy and happiness
Dear Jackie, I watched this yesterday night but avoided commenting because I was falling asleep and thought it deserved more attention. I am really sorry that you went through all of this. You’re such a precious soul, beautiful and talented. And it makes me sad to hear about all of this. I don’t know you but the energy you give out it seems so positive and genuine. I’ve gone and still am going through something similar and then just like now watching your videos helped me feeling less weird and more confident in myself and not feel embarrassed about embracing my weirdness. I honestly would have never thought to see you like this. The you in this video is different but in a good way. I’m really happy to see you feeling comfortable with sharing your story and talking about it not for us to know but for yourself. I truly wish you the best and running away can help but please reach out. Sending you so much love ❤️
Your story gives me so much hope for my daughter who has experienced so much pain in searching for who she is & what she needs. Bless you for sharing ❤
Hi @Jackie ! I just saw your video, and I wanted to share something with you that has helped me through times similar to yours: “when you don’t get to win, you learn”, and I think that the extraordinary thing about you is that your learning is healing you as well. What I love about your videos is that you inspire me to do things for myself, like surprise myself by trying out new things so I can feel more confident. I really relate to what you said about feeling lost and wanting a connection to somebody, cause I’m 23 now and I don’t think I’ve ever felt like somebody has loved me and stuff like that so I also have made some unhealthy choices to numb that out. Then I come home and watch your videos and realize I want to do something nice and good for ME. I wanted to tell you this because I hope that by realizing how great you’ve been for us, you recognize your worth and value. You’re creative, kind, inspiring, brave and beautiful, and you have built a super cool community for it that is ready to give you all the love you deserve. You’re in the right track to become the best version of yourself. Be kind to yourself 🧡 I’m your friend, anytime you need or want me too. Love you!!!
Honey you are a great person! you are just so gorgeous! and kind and sweet to everyone. im following you from years now and i always feen how genuine you are and i feel like im watching a princess talking..love you! be the best of you and be happy x
I can actually relate so much to this and you putting those feelings into words for me helped a lot. You are so brave and strong and have been an inspiration for years of my life growing up. Thank you for opening up, everything is going to be ok ❤️❤️
I can relate with everything you told especially with the tension being in public and being seen and feeling like you have to hide yourself. Abusive relationships leaves this scar to you..
Hey Jackie! I've scrolled through the comments and I am so proud of all the love and support for you. God loves you so much girl, and you are of infinite worth to Him. ❤️ I so genuinely wanted to hug you while you were telling your story because I relate on so many levels to almost everything you were saying. I am so proud of you for being brave and sharing your struggles with the whole internet. God will bring you healing if you ask Him. And I just want to let you know from the bottom of my heart how much I care about you and how much God loves you.
You're a beautiful strong person Who has overcome so much And you learn to going on with your life an be OK with Who you were And are!! I understand you and i admire you so much!!you have a great And strong soul!! Keep going!! Life is going to be so wonderful!! You are a fighter!!!
Jackie, you are so strong, beautiful and so so brave. I’ve been a fan of yours since March 2017 and I have loved watching you grow. This video really touched me. Yes I am younger but I can understand some of the things you talked about. I was starting to cry a little because you didn’t deserve to be treated like that. you are such a special person and you are so inspirational. You have done amazingly well and I’m so so proud. You have had amazing opportunities like meeting Selena Gomez & Charlotte Tilbury!! Cannot believe you turn 24 tomorrow that’s insane!! You inspire me so much and you are just so amazing and brave for sharing this with us. Love u loads Jackie 💗xxx
I've been following you for years but just recently found your vlog channel, I never could have known that about you. You are so brave to open up like this! In some ways I truly understand what you mean about friends and connecting We love you Jackie, keep being this beautiful person and lighting people's days!
When you mentioned how shows would make you forget about stuff I related to that because back in freshman year of high school I was in a negative place and I would watch your videos to just forget about the things that me feel bad. ♡ you're really brave for talking about this. 💗💗💗 we love you Jackie!
Jackie thank u so much for sharing! I’ve dealt and am dealing with similar issues and you really helped me. Thank you 💕 and I wish you all the best for N.Y. 🙌🏻
Oh my babe . Im here for u. You re never alone nor unwanted. If i see in the mall i ll come up and hug u. You deserve everything beautiful in this world.. I watched u grow up into the most amazing and hard working woman and im so proud of you. Always be sure that u are loved and so appereciated. You have a strong personnality and mistakes never define u. You re adorable . I love you so much and cant wait to hug you one day .
Jackie, thank you so much for opening up your heart to all of us! Your story is relatable to so many and it means a lot that you’ve shared it with us. You’re beautiful inside and out and I’m so happy that you now understand your immeasurable worth and what you deserve (the best)! Greater things have yet to come!!
Thanks so much for having the courage to post this video. I’m beginning University soon, and I’ve realized that whenever something new and good happens, I don’t feel deserving of it (if that makes sense). So lately I’ve been tearing down my self esteem since I don’t even know what to do with myself. You should totally make another video on self love and how you discovered that :) please continue to be more open with us, xoxo
You are beautiful, and brave, and special! It takes a lot of guts to come out with that! You are such an inspiration to young people! I know your story will help so many boys and girls out there that are struggling to find themselves. 18-24 is a hard time. You are stuck between being in the comfort of your parents to being thrown into the "real world". I promise honey, things get better. Love yourself, cherish your family & friends, and don't be afraid to ask for help! You are human, just like the rest of us! We all need help from time to time. I hope all of your dreams come true, and I hope you can realize one day how special you are! 💗
You are so talented and beautiful inside and out. You are so brave for sharing something so personal. I know what it’s like to hold onto something for so long, and the struggle of letting others in. I will be here full of love and support for you. 💗
Thank you so much for sharing this Jackie. You have been my favorite you tuber for years now and I always wanted to be more like you. I have dealt with depression for the past 2 years and to hear you talk about it is so comforting. I have made mistakes as well and used unhealthy outlets and wasn’t the person I should have been because I didn’t know how to deal with what I was feeling. I have been seeing a therapist since February and I feel like I’m finally on the tail end of my depression. Thank you so much for this. I love you always 💕
Thank you so much for sharing something so personal! I feel like so many people can relate to different parts of your story if not all, I know I do! You're amazing I have so much respect for you!
I'm seeing this late because I obsessed with your makeup/transformations ❤ anyway same happened to me girl in HS, a stupid guy made up a rumor and that's eventually what I thought I was , I'm so glad your better you are soooo super talented and seem very genuine, but it does take awhile to get over s.a ,hell it took me to my 30's to realize how abused I had been ! Anyway much love and support Jackie ❤❤❤
I also had a really negative high school and college experience at times. I never really had any close friends and I had a very bad earing disorder in college. I know how it feels to be completely alone. You are so brave to share your experiences with the world. I've always looked up to you and I think you are a beautiful soul!
I absolutely understand how you feel. When I was 19 I meet an older man whom I started dating and whom later abused and raped me , and now looking back and talking to people about it a lot of people always asked why didn't you just leave him but I had such a low self worth and low self esteem that like I knew if I left him no one else would want me and no one else would even wanna be my friend because I was so "damaged" and "used" that everyone would just think I was weird. It took me a lot of time to acknowledge and accept the fact that this was a bad relationship and that I actually was worth so much more. Fast forward to now, I'm 23 I have been diagnosed with PTSD but I regularly see a therapist to work trough everything. What I have realized and what I want everyone to know is that it was absolutely not my fault that it happened to me, some people are just evil and what has happened to you does NOT reflect who you are as a person. And for everyone out there struggling with domestic abuse it does get better, I am so proud of the person that I am today and I wouldn't be that person if it hadn't happened. And to you Jackie thank you so much for sharing your story, it really made me feel like I'm not so alone with my story and that we all have had bad things happened to us and the only thing we can do is to grown and learn from it, we have ALL done misstakes but it does not define us.
Thank you for sharing I am recovering from an abusive relationship with a narcissist so hearing stories how others overcame their abusive relationships or giving advice really helps.
Hey love, a bit late but, I just wanted to say: you’re not alone. I was in two abusive relationships starting when I was 16, I put up with a lot of stuff because I was feeling so low. I was sexually assaulted as well. I grew depressed and suicidal, It was super rough. I was lucky to have friends that supported me and a great therapist, honestly if you haven’t considered therapy I would try it out. But don’t worry, you’re not alone, and I’m glad you opened up and are talking about it.
As someone who’s completely lost at the moment this video really spoke to me and you are really brave ! Wish you all the best in New York and in your path to recovery 🙏🏻❤️
Look at you now babe, you are a strong, confident, independent young woman at the highlight of her life and you can do anything. Teenage years are hard but we can all overcome them and as adults we are no longer in that situation and we can leave it in de past. I've seen you grow over the years and I'm so proud of you! ❤️😘🤗
hey, jackie! i just have to say that this video was definitely something i needed to hear. i also had a very unpleasant time in high school -- though for very different reasons. i was very depressed to the point of being suicidal and my self-worth was very, very low, and i became very closed off. my grades and my social life suffered to the point that i couldn't graduate high school with my friends because i had failed too many classes. needless to say it was not a fun experience for me. the summer after school ended i stopped talking to a lot of my friends and just retreated way more into myself; i decided to move to las vegas with my mom after a fight with my dad -- which i should not have done. i love my mom, she's not a bad person, but she's not a good mom. she's the reason where a lot of my self-esteem issues stem from. growing she would often pick at me for being too "lazy" or forgetful or clumsy, and rely on me to do a lot of the parenting for my younger siblings -- all while drilling at me that i wouldn't be loved if i wasn't pretty or thin enough. it's honestly a miracle that i didn't develop a serious eating disorder while being around her. thank god my dad has always been the complete opposite, completely supportive and caring, or else who knows what might have become of me. i only lasted about 6 months with my mom after high school before it all became to much and i decided to stay in tijuana with my dad again after coming to visit for my birthday that year. i have struggled a lot with my mental health since then -- like A LOT. it's been almost four years now and i finally feel like i'm on a good path, and i had to learn that i do need a lot more outside help than i would like to admit. with a lot of support from my dad i have finally decided to pursue my long time dream of going to beauty school -- and it's been great! i'm finally going out more, seeing my friends more often and no longer spending all day exclusively online. it's been YEARS since i felt this good about myself, i can't believe i've actually managed to even make new friendships that aren't online and even reconnecting with old friends that i've missed. i know from an outside perspective it seems insignificant, but i know inside that i've made progress because i feel *good* and proud, even if i've only accomplished very little. it's still something, y'know. it's still progress -- even if it's taken basically cutting out my mom out of my life. anyway, this got super rambly, but i just wanted to say thank you for sharing your story, it really hit home for me. and you are absolutely right; we can't judge a book just by its cover. on the outside i might seem a little ditzy and kind of happy-go-lucky, but i've struggled a lot mentally and that's just the front i decide to put on so other people don't see the insecurities.
you're such a beautiful soul Jackie and I really hope that you find healing. You're such an inspiration to me and many others! I know you may feel alone, but I think anyone would be lucky to have you in their lives and soon you'll find your people
This is so powerful. I’m so proud of you for sharing. I’ve been out of a toxic relationship for almost 2 years and it was the hardest thing to go throug, but in the long run, the best thing that could’ve happened. Love you, prayin for you to find yourself the right way. Jeremiah 29:11 💖
Nothing but respect after watching this ❤ I've been watching your videos for a long time, and I would never tell something serious was happenig. It's very scary how we are able to hide such a huge part of our life. After dealing with some difficulties myself, I believe the best we can do is talk and let it out of our system. As for "running away", I also believe we have to find our place in the world, where we feel safe and confortabel, no matter how many moves it takes. I hope New York will be that safe space for you ❤ All the love xx
Thanks Sara, I hid so much from everyone, my family included & being so secretive was exhausting! Talking & letting go is helpful for sure, thanks for the love
We are all with you,you can heal.I love you,sending you all of my best wishes and love in this world 💙💙💙💛💛💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💪💪💙💙💙💛💛💛💙💙💙💙💛❤❤💚💜💜💜💜💚💚💜💜💜💕💕💕💞💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💜💙💛💎💎💎💎💙💙💛💛💛💛💙💙💕💓💓💘💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💘💘💘💘💘💘💞💖💕💓💋💋💚💜💙💙💛💛💙💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💙💙💜💖💚💙💖💖💖💖💖💙💙💙💛
Yay! NYC is where I am from, would love to hang out. You're so relatable and I felt what you said right in the beginning about making the video, and just doing it, and how if you think so much about it you won't do it haha. Life is just, wild lol.
I’m so so proud of you, thank you for sharing your experiences. I can’t imagine how difficult it is. This means so much to you I’m sure and to so many of us. You are strong as hell, a beautiful human being and an inspiration. Love you 💗
Be strong, Jackie! We all have a difficult time in our life :) You are a wonderful person and you should be proud of yourself. Easier said than done I know, but we need to just keep moving forward :)
Any girl who called her ugly most have some self esteem issues as well. Jackie is one of the most beautiful and sweet girl I've seen on UA-cam ❤️ You can never know someone's true struggles. Love you Jackie
Tegan Sigafoos they called her ugly because they're jealous because she's beautiful!
You are so brave, so spiritually beautiful, so strong and such a genuine inspiration for opening up like this (even though you completely didn't have to, and thank you for feeling able to share this very painful and traumatising series of events and feelings with us). I truly truly truly hope that life gives you all the best that it can offer because you DESERVE it, and even though we don't know each other personally I have so much respect and admiration for you and I am sending you so so so much positivity and hope and happiness!!! xxx
Thank you so much, I cried reading this comment when I first uploaded this video because you are so incredibly kind. Thank you for always being so lovely to me, I love your creativity & seeing your posts on insta too
@@JackieVlogs you're more than welcome!!! and thank you so much
Agreed she is a strong, beautiful and a strong warrior
This is so comforting. I was diagnosed with episodic depression and body dysmorphia 5 months ago and I’m at the bottom of a deep hole. I’ll get out of it, I know I will, but right now I’m having a tough time.
Seeing someone who seems perfect online open up about their experiences and dark moments makes me so happy. Not because I enjoy hearing other people’s pain, but because it makes me realise that not everything is as polished as it seems whilst I’m falling apart. Human connection and communication is priceless - it’s what we live for and it’s beautiful. You’re the best Jackie :)
hi, i just wanted to say i'm really proud of you. i know what depression is like and i'm so sorry that you have to deal with that. you're in my thoughts, i'm wishing you good luck and crossed fingers
When you are older and you look back at that time, you will think that these days made you stronger! And it sounds weird, but every path, whether good or bad, leads to something new and something better! Just stay strong, everything will be fine! ❤️
Jackie my heart is breaking for you 💔, you'll come out of this stronger 🤗
You’re so relatable. I love your raw honesty. If you lived closer I would love to be friends with someone like you! Genuine people are hard to find. Feel better!!
I haven't watched this fully yet, but I love raw, genuine conversations like this. Thank you for sharing with us 💜
I'm SO happy to hear that you've accepted yourself now, and that things are looking up for you. I feel like I've grown up with you, since I've been watching you for so long. (Since 2014, I'm 24, will be 25 in December), so I'm really proud of you for sharing such an honest inspirational story with us 💜
Oh my gosh I feel like this video was so self healing for me because I have gone through something so extremely similar and I have never been able to really replace my soul friend either so I totally get the tense feeling and the insecurities about second guessing who you are. Thank you Jackie!! This hit home 💕
I’ve been watching your videos probably around 2012-2013 because I was actually at a low point too and UA-cam/your videos were like an escape for me. It’s sad to think that you were feeling low too when your videos were cheering me up.
I totally related to everything you talked about and I really appreciate that you posted this - it reminded me that we all make mistakes and to just focus on how far we’ve come. I’m lucky in that I’m doing a second degree at a different uni so I kind got a second chance at this whole fun uni life but with the lessons I learned from the shit experiences the first time around. Happy to report that finding genuinely good friends really does make a difference.
Also not to be weird, but I’m from north of Toronto too and back when I had insta, I think I remember seeing that we knew some of the same people. For what it’s worth, if we had gone to the same school or run in the same circles, I would have totally been your friend! I feel like we’re so similar.
I hope New York treats you well. Keep taking good care of yourself 💕
I'm so glad you get a second chance at the uni life!! have a great time girl and YES to good friends... really does make all the difference. no way!! small world
Omg people can become so mean. Girl your soul is so pure. You seem to be so kind. None of those idiots deserve you in their lives.
Thank you, next ❤️
Thank you so much for this video. My highschool and university years were bad for almost the same reasons. You made me feel much better about it, knowing that i'm not alone.
I'm usually the person that understands everyone and would sit and listen to whatever they wanna say and never judge them, but i've never found anyone that would do the same with me
Starting back at college this week and this video just...felt like something I needed to hear. All the love and support to you Jackie for opening up like this and saying how even now you are still working through things
I'm so glad. Have a great time, it can be amazing for you! Thanks for the support
I loved this video, so much. I connected with so much of it. I love these kind of videos, thank you so much for sharing!!
Dear Jackie ❤︎
I have been on your channel since 2013. I have never seen you this honest and open about how you really feel and felt back then. It's touching and very brave to open up to us like this. I hope you find peace in your own skin. I'm sure this video is helpfull to others because you are surely not alone.
Big hug x
To all the young people out there please, please listen to her when she says you can’t go through the motions of a relationship and expect it to work. You need to take time for yourself and you can’t do that with another person. Sometimes that takes years and that’s ok, your worth it and your good enough to love yourself.
Last year was rough for me, but I found an escape in beauty and hair. Your channel was a huge inspiration for me and you have taught me so much. I get very excited whenever you upload, and I'm glad that this helped you. I started crying when you said that you are starting to love yourself now because that made me very happy and is very important. Thank you for everything you have done for me and many other people who are inspired by not just your work but you everyday.
We are here for you, no matter what. I just want you to know that here you have many people who admires you and who just want you to be fine. This video is very helpful, because you are telling people that they are not alone, we love you, thank you for doing this.
Thank you for sharing! It's so hard to talk about trauma, this is definitely a major step forward!
Will be here for and with you❤️
I feel for what you went through so much. Pop culture is the same kind of escape for you as for me: forgetting about yourself and your life and living another one. It's really hard but it means you still want to live, just not that situation. But things do change and it depends on us to some extent to change them in a way that brings us closer to a life we want. Little by little, internally and externally, we can change ourselves and our worlds to fit us better. I hope we can all get to good places, and greater from there one day soon. All the best, Jackie! ♡
I have watched your videos for so long! We’re the same age and I would always put your videos on while I got ready because it felt like I was getting ready with a friend ❤️ I’m so sorry you went through so much pain all those years. Being vulnerable like this takes so much courage. Remember you have friends all across the world rooting for you to succeed and who are looking up to you! Thank you :)
Sending you positive thoughts Jackie!!!!! A lot of what you are saying have hit home. Much love to you
I am glad you are realizing that feeling confident has a lot to do with mistakes people make. If you feel low or down, always seek your parents (if you have a good relationship with them), if not seek a psychologist and/or a close relative whom you trust, but always pray to God. Don't try to please everyone else, because that's when you get in trouble. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND TALENTED AND WILL GO ALONG WAY, IF YOU FOLLOW YOUR HEART ALWAYS. I WISH YOU THE BEST. YOU ARE MY FAVORITE MERMAID COSPLAYER :) GET OUT TO TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS, STOP JUMPING IN ANOTHER MAN'S HANDS. BE YOURSELF AND LEARN TO ACCEPT YOURSELF AS YOU ARE AND THAT IS GOOD ENOUGH. THINK OF YOUR FUTURE AS A PARENT TO BE, WHAT AND HOW YOU WANT YOUR CHILD TO BE AND JUST REMEMBER. GOD LOVES YOU.
Wow Jackie! Stay Strong! Thank you for sharing your personal life with us! You’re not alone! Many people, myself included had the same experience! Life is beautiful! Sometimes it’s hard to fight those negative thoughts but you’re beautiful and so is life!
Love love love love LOVVVVEEE YOU!!!!!!!! 🥰😘😍
I’m so sorry Jackie. I never would have expected this. As long as you learn from your mistakes it will make you stronger. Keep moving forward you have a bright future and you’re a beautiful girl! Stay safe and remember your worth.
I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through Jackie. It’s so brave of you to open up to your UA-cam community and talk about things that were traumatic for you. I know it’s not easy to talk about them, but allowing yourself to open up and talk about them publicly really shows how strong of a woman you are! I’ve been watching your channel since the beginning and the person you are on the inside is just as beautiful as the person you are on the outside.
Thanks so much for sharing Jackie! This is so important for other people to hear, it can help them if they’re going through something similar 💕 this video is very well spoken and put together. I’m sorry you’ve had these things happen to you. You are a kind soul, much love.
Thanks so much, I was worried that I wasn't very well spoken so this comment means a lot to me haha! thank YOU for the kind words. Much love back xo
I am so sorry you had to go through that. But hey after the storm there is peace and serenity.
I have been following you in UA-cam since 2012, me and my younger sister discovered you through your Almost Lover cover. You are my favorite UA-camr because your content are always meticulous, useful, and inspiring. I am sorry to learn that all those years have been tumultuous to you. I hope you would feel how genuinely grateful I am to you. Though you may not know me personally, I think of you as a friend (I am also born '95) as I witness bits and pieces of your life since then. I suffered burn out in 2017 that escalated to cripling depression in 2018. I feel suffocated in uni and I just want to escape and I depended on vices which are sleeping and reading fiction, and just whatever random distraction so I wouldn't have to deal with my actual situation. I became too comfortable that I become complacent and it came to a point that I couldn't function properly anymore. I became socially awkward, I keep missing classes, I failed subjects, I dismissed proper hygeine, I would binge read and oversleep but it's getting better now. In your London vlog you also talked about feeling low. I truly believe this year is our healing. Let's keep fighting and striving! All the best to a new chapter in you life. Love you Jackie, we'll always be here to support you so go girl! 💕x
Thank you for sharing . My high school experience was shit too. That made me feel a bit better about where I am now. You can’t change things overnight.
This broke my heart, i can seriously relate in some level. i'm glad youre better and doing well, you deserve the best! I know this won't happen but if you need anything or talk to somebody we are always gonna be here, at least i'm always gonna be here for you, i have watched your videos for so long and we never spect anything, stay strong, you are beautiful inside and out! love u xx!!
This is such an incredibly refreshing video and I am so grateful that you opened up to us. I have watched you for years and it is so incredibly freeing to hear you share your journey. You're so relatable and raw and genuine. We love you Jackie
Thanks Dana
This video was amazing! So real. Your videos brighten up people’s days. ❤️
I love you Jackie. (we actually know each other) I do know you and you have a beautiful heart. I can relate. Alot of people think when you are pretty you don't have problems but that is far from the truth. Sometimes your really lonely because people have an image of you. I'm so glad that you told your story. I will always love you.
I really feel you thanks for sharing!
I hope we can all be better with time💗
Jackie - you spoke to me on a really personal level. Our stories appear very similar and I feel so haunted by my mistakes and the trauma I can’t recover from - all because I was so desperate to feel love and attention :( love you
aw try not to feel haunted, read the comments - we've all been there
Literally you are one of the most talented, brilliant, and beautiful people on UA-cam. You have such a bright spirit and it makes me so sad that you’ve went through this. You’re so strong and brave for posting this and you’ve helped more than you think. Love you Jackie ! 💗💗💗
It’s takes a lot of courage to talk about hard things we go through because it’s like you have to relive them. I’m so glad that you shared this because I know that I and so many other people can relate to your experiences. So happy that you have opened up and it’s refreshing to see The behind the scenes Jackie and you’re so inspiring.💗💛 love you and your videos soo much!!!
Jackie, that was so inspiring and beautiful. We are always trying to find ourselves and sometimes It's ok to get lost, take time to heal and comeback stronger. Thank you for sharing your journey, I lost my best friend 6 years ago over some stupid fight and even thought we worked things out, our friendship never was the same again and I miss that so much, having someone to talk about and tell her how my day was. I love your vídeos because despite not knowing eachother I feel we are friends and I can relate with you con so many levels. You're a beautiful soul, keep being honest and brave, the world needs more people like you right now. Kisses from Venezuela.
I’m so glad you are still here with us! I’ve struggled depression/suicidal thoughts for years and am thankfully better now. Please reach out if you ever need someone to talk to! No judgments, just open ears and support 💕
This is why I love your video I love movies and it helps forget and escape for a while and I watch your videos because it’s so fun!!
Aw good!!! more coming up :) xo
I’m in and out of NYC a lot, maybe one day I’ll run into you! Best of luck with your life adventures
yep definitely relate to losing the best friends in high school, i was strangely popular if you will, or simply had a lot of friends in middle school. then we all did move to the same high school but none of us were in the same classes whatsoever and everyone got new friends and i got depression soon after. my mum thinks thats what caused it. in sixth form after high school i did ofc make new friends sure but everyone went to uni now and i didn’t, my friends slowly stopped talking to me and thats where im at now.
its hard for sure! i hope you can make some new friends or connect with old ones when the time is right. know that I hear you and love you! xo
Jackie Vlogs yeah im just not to sure where to start! i have internet friends of course, that i have also met but yknow thats not exactly the best option bc they live so far away! love u too
Every time i've watched your videos, i thought she is definitely someone who cares about herself, and even thought she is such a lovely girl and will probably be a great parent one day who can teach every kind of hair styling to her daughter :)) Please try to see your worth like we do. You are a lady and don't let anyone treat you less, even including yourself.
This really touched me. It’s nice seeing this more honest side of you. It’s crazy how the teenage years can be so definitive. Honestly stuff that I did way back in middle school is still affecting my life at 19. Be careful who you let in, and just sit back and always think twice before you do something
Right?! I love your comment, it's a life lesson for sure
It was amazing that you were this brave to open up what your life really was.we all have difficulties and mistakes but when you go to sacial media it breaks you more.bc it seems that every other person has the best time and is so high. But I appreciate it that you told your story honestly and revealed your lonely innocent soul that makes mistakes and faces difficulties.
I really love you✨❤️
I'm so glad I watched this video! I have been through a lot of really similar situations to what you described. I also had a regrettably wild phase in college and for a while afterward, and I was also in an emotionally abusive, highly toxic yet codependent relationship in which I was cheated on. I am still processing the trauma that it caused me nearly a year after escaping said relationship, and I still have frequent panic attacks and am often triggered and haunted by memories of it. I am glad I am not alone, and know that you are not alone, either! I also try to deal with anxiety by doing my makeup because I find it calming, enjoyable, and fulfilling. Thank you for sharing your story, Jackie. I love you and your videos!
It's like listening to something very similar to my past. Ugh I wish we could be friends. I'm in PA so closer than LA haha but you are NOT alone. You're beautiful and deserve so much. That is all
Jackie, I have been watching you for a very long time and this video broke my heart because I'm 23 and I can totally relate to you. Honestly I would've never guessed any of that happened to you but I want you to know you are brave and strong. Lots of people don't make it out and you did, remember that. Thank you for being vulnerable even tho you have been turned away so much. That just shows strength.
I remember in one of your old Q&As you said in response I believe to someone asking how you stay positive or deal with feeling bad etc. And you said that when you were filming you were often feeling the lowest. This really stuck with me, and helped/helps me when I feel low too I push all that energy into something productive and distracting and I don’t think I would’ve done half the things I have done if I didn’t do that. I’ve watched you since I was 18 and have been in awe of your creativity and skills and I just want to say thank you for turning your lowest moments into something that helps others. It takes a really special person to do that. I’m sorry to hear about how bad things got for you and hope you love New York ❤️
Girly I love you!!! This video helped me realize how cut off I had been from other people. I haven't felt like I had that many friends that I had deep relationships with, or that made me particularly happy. But I remembered that the best way to have good friends is to be a good friend. I have noticed people at school by themselves, people who may not have friends in a class, or maybe people who just seem to have a weight in their eyes, and my first response is to say hi, but then there is always that nagging voice that tries to tell me that it isn't worth it, that they are fine, and I can't make a difference. But just being nice to a person isn't signing away my soul! Who cares if they think I'm weird, that's their deal, and if they honestly want to be alone that's also fine. But as someone who knows what it's like to be alone, I feel like no one should have to be, especially when I can brighten their day just by smiling, saying hi, or trying to get to know more about them. Anyway this video really just inspired me to take more courage in those social situations, and try to just be a little better. Thank you, girl you are brave and bright and beautiful. No matter how low we sink, there is a way out, and no matter how much of our pure inner worth seems to be lost, it never truly goes away, it can be forgotten, but not lost.
You have no idea how much I needed this video. Thank you for sharing your story to help others! 💕 I’m on the same journey as you right now and it’s so nice to know that I’m not alone in it all! I’m rooting for you and I hope you continue to grow into the best version of yourself 💕 I pray that life brings you all the happiness and joy you deserve!
You're so reading my mail! Thank you for sharing in solidarity!
Dear Jackie, I love all your videos. The content and tutorials are spectacular. I think the worst part of being in your 20's and late teens is that you somehow feel like everything is your fault "If only, i was smarter. Or I should have known better." It took me a long time to realize, "I did the best I could with the information I had and the feelings, I was feeling." Please don't blame yourself for your past. They made you into this incredible, innovative, artistic, sensitive person. I hope New York treats you well. Can't wait for the next video!
I have always loved watching your makeup and hair videos and thought you were beautiful and had the perfect life in perfect and scenic Canada (fairytale setting), but hearing about your experience makes me love you as a person. I relate to your story more than I care to admit because I am also very ashamed of some of my past actions because I just wanted someone to care and love me and see me. I get you. Thanks for sharing your experience. It takes a lot of strength and bravery to be this vulnerable and open.
From my point of view, this is the greatest video you have ever made.
Let go Jackie. Mistakes happen and I know they’re not things to be proud of, but trust me, those mistakes don’t define us. I can see that you were hard on yourself and I can relate to that aspect. But the minute you acknowledge that it’s in the past and shift your attention on you “today,” is the minute you start to love yourself more and blossom. Forgive, and let go ♥️
I so admire your honesty and telling how much you have over come, You are so strong and I fully support you, you are an inspiration Jackie and how exciting your fresh new journey of moving to New York will be i wish you nothing but positive energy and happiness
I’m sorry some bad things happened to you. You deserve much more good things in your life! I wish you the best:)
Dear Jackie, I watched this yesterday night but avoided commenting because I was falling asleep and thought it deserved more attention. I am really sorry that you went through all of this. You’re such a precious soul, beautiful and talented. And it makes me sad to hear about all of this. I don’t know you but the energy you give out it seems so positive and genuine. I’ve gone and still am going through something similar and then just like now watching your videos helped me feeling less weird and more confident in myself and not feel embarrassed about embracing my weirdness. I honestly would have never thought to see you like this. The you in this video is different but in a good way. I’m really happy to see you feeling comfortable with sharing your story and talking about it not for us to know but for yourself. I truly wish you the best and running away can help but please reach out. Sending you so much love ❤️
Your story gives me so much hope for my daughter who has experienced so much pain in searching for who she is & what she needs. Bless you for sharing ❤
Hi @Jackie ! I just saw your video, and I wanted to share something with you that has helped me through times similar to yours: “when you don’t get to win, you learn”, and I think that the extraordinary thing about you is that your learning is healing you as well.
What I love about your videos is that you inspire me to do things for myself, like surprise myself by trying out new things so I can feel more confident. I really relate to what you said about feeling lost and wanting a connection to somebody, cause I’m 23 now and I don’t think I’ve ever felt like somebody has loved me and stuff like that so I also have made some unhealthy choices to numb that out. Then I come home and watch your videos and realize I want to do something nice and good for ME.
I wanted to tell you this because I hope that by realizing how great you’ve been for us, you recognize your worth and value. You’re creative, kind, inspiring, brave and beautiful, and you have built a super cool community for it that is ready to give you all the love you deserve.
You’re in the right track to become the best version of yourself. Be kind to yourself 🧡
I’m your friend, anytime you need or want me too. Love you!!!
Honey you are a great person! you are just so gorgeous! and kind and sweet to everyone. im following you from years now and i always feen how genuine you are and i feel like im watching a princess talking..love you! be the best of you and be happy x
I can actually relate so much to this and you putting those feelings into words for me helped a lot. You are so brave and strong and have been an inspiration for years of my life growing up. Thank you for opening up, everything is going to be ok ❤️❤️
H2O is my escape too!!🧜🏻♀️💙🧡
H20 FOR LIFE!
I am glad you are doing better! You make so many people happy with your upbeat video’s and you deserve to be happy too!
I can relate with everything you told especially with the tension being in public and being seen and feeling like you have to hide yourself. Abusive relationships leaves this scar to you..
I went straight to the comments section, just wanted to tell you how drop dead gorgeus you are, and you are so brave sharing this❤️
Hey Jackie! I've scrolled through the comments and I am so proud of all the love and support for you. God loves you so much girl, and you are of infinite worth to Him. ❤️ I so genuinely wanted to hug you while you were telling your story because I relate on so many levels to almost everything you were saying. I am so proud of you for being brave and sharing your struggles with the whole internet. God will bring you healing if you ask Him. And I just want to let you know from the bottom of my heart how much I care about you and how much God loves you.
You're a beautiful strong person Who has overcome so much And you learn to going on with your life an be OK with Who you were And are!! I understand you and i admire you so much!!you have a great And strong soul!! Keep going!! Life is going to be so wonderful!! You are a fighter!!!
Jackie, you are so strong, beautiful and so so brave. I’ve been a fan of yours since March 2017 and I have loved watching you grow. This video really touched me. Yes I am younger but I can understand some of the things you talked about. I was starting to cry a little because you didn’t deserve to be treated like that. you are such a special person and you are so inspirational. You have done amazingly well and I’m so so proud. You have had amazing opportunities like meeting Selena Gomez & Charlotte Tilbury!! Cannot believe you turn 24 tomorrow that’s insane!! You inspire me so much and you are just so amazing and brave for sharing this with us. Love u loads Jackie 💗xxx
I've been following you for years but just recently found your vlog channel, I never could have known that about you. You are so brave to open up like this! In some ways I truly understand what you mean about friends and connecting
We love you Jackie, keep being this beautiful person and lighting people's days!
When you mentioned how shows would make you forget about stuff I related to that because back in freshman year of high school I was in a negative place and I would watch your videos to just forget about the things that me feel bad. ♡ you're really brave for talking about this. 💗💗💗 we love you Jackie!
Jackie thank u so much for sharing! I’ve dealt and am dealing with similar issues and you really helped me. Thank you 💕 and I wish you all the best for N.Y. 🙌🏻
Thank YOU for listening
Oh my babe . Im here for u. You re never alone nor unwanted. If i see in the mall i ll come up and hug u. You deserve everything beautiful in this world.. I watched u grow up into the most amazing and hard working woman and im so proud of you. Always be sure that u are loved and so appereciated. You have a strong personnality and mistakes never define u. You re adorable . I love you so much and cant wait to hug you one day .
I relate! Shit sucks props to you for leaving when you knew it was time for you to better yourself. It’s hard, but you did it ❤️ you go girl.
Jackie, thank you so much for opening up your heart to all of us! Your story is relatable to so many and it means a lot that you’ve shared it with us. You’re beautiful inside and out and I’m so happy that you now understand your immeasurable worth and what you deserve (the best)! Greater things have yet to come!!
Thanks so much for having the courage to post this video. I’m beginning University soon, and I’ve realized that whenever something new and good happens, I don’t feel deserving of it (if that makes sense). So lately I’ve been tearing down my self esteem since I don’t even know what to do with myself. You should totally make another video on self love and how you discovered that :) please continue to be more open with us, xoxo
You are beautiful, and brave, and special! It takes a lot of guts to come out with that! You are such an inspiration to young people! I know your story will help so many boys and girls out there that are struggling to find themselves. 18-24 is a hard time. You are stuck between being in the comfort of your parents to being thrown into the "real world". I promise honey, things get better. Love yourself, cherish your family & friends, and don't be afraid to ask for help! You are human, just like the rest of us! We all need help from time to time. I hope all of your dreams come true, and I hope you can realize one day how special you are! 💗
You are so talented and beautiful inside and out. You are so brave for sharing something so personal. I know what it’s like to hold onto something for so long, and the struggle of letting others in. I will be here full of love and support for you. 💗
Thanks Chloe
Thank you so much for sharing this Jackie. You have been my favorite you tuber for years now and I always wanted to be more like you. I have dealt with depression for the past 2 years and to hear you talk about it is so comforting. I have made mistakes as well and used unhealthy outlets and wasn’t the person I should have been because I didn’t know how to deal with what I was feeling. I have been seeing a therapist since February and I feel like I’m finally on the tail end of my depression. Thank you so much for this. I love you always 💕
Thank you so much for sharing something so personal! I feel like so many people can relate to different parts of your story if not all, I know I do! You're amazing I have so much respect for you!
I'm seeing this late because I obsessed with your makeup/transformations ❤ anyway same happened to me girl in HS, a stupid guy made up a rumor and that's eventually what I thought I was , I'm so glad your better you are soooo super talented and seem very genuine, but it does take awhile to get over s.a ,hell it took me to my 30's to realize how abused I had been ! Anyway much love and support Jackie ❤❤❤
you are so strong and so brave to tell your story, I'm sending so much light your way so that you can continue healing.
I also had a really negative high school and college experience at times. I never really had any close friends and I had a very bad earing disorder in college. I know how it feels to be completely alone. You are so brave to share your experiences with the world. I've always looked up to you and I think you are a beautiful soul!
I'm sorry to hear this! i hope you find brighter days ahead too. thank you for listening & connecting with me and I think you are a beautiful soul too
I absolutely understand how you feel. When I was 19 I meet an older man whom I started dating and whom later abused and raped me , and now looking back and talking to people about it a lot of people always asked why didn't you just leave him but I had such a low self worth and low self esteem that like I knew if I left him no one else would want me and no one else would even wanna be my friend because I was so "damaged" and "used" that everyone would just think I was weird. It took me a lot of time to acknowledge and accept the fact that this was a bad relationship and that I actually was worth so much more. Fast forward to now, I'm 23 I have been diagnosed with PTSD but I regularly see a therapist to work trough everything. What I have realized and what I want everyone to know is that it was absolutely not my fault that it happened to me, some people are just evil and what has happened to you does NOT reflect who you are as a person. And for everyone out there struggling with domestic abuse it does get better, I am so proud of the person that I am today and I wouldn't be that person if it hadn't happened. And to you Jackie thank you so much for sharing your story, it really made me feel like I'm not so alone with my story and that we all have had bad things happened to us and the only thing we can do is to grown and learn from it, we have ALL done misstakes but it does not define us.
Thank you for sharing I am recovering from an abusive relationship with a narcissist so hearing stories how others overcame their abusive relationships or giving advice really helps.
Hey love, a bit late but, I just wanted to say: you’re not alone. I was in two abusive relationships starting when I was 16, I put up with a lot of stuff because I was feeling so low. I was sexually assaulted as well. I grew depressed and suicidal, It was super rough. I was lucky to have friends that supported me and a great therapist, honestly if you haven’t considered therapy I would try it out. But don’t worry, you’re not alone, and I’m glad you opened up and are talking about it.
As someone who’s completely lost at the moment this video really spoke to me and you are really brave ! Wish you all the best in New York and in your path to recovery 🙏🏻❤️
Look at you now babe, you are a strong, confident, independent young woman at the highlight of her life and you can do anything. Teenage years are hard but we can all overcome them and as adults we are no longer in that situation and we can leave it in de past. I've seen you grow over the years and I'm so proud of you! ❤️😘🤗
Love you Michelle, thanks for being my friend❤️
@@JackieVlogs always!! So much love for you! ❤️ 😘
Thank you for being so vulnerable and opening up. It really shows how strong you are. I’m sure you are helping a lot of people. Xoxo
hey, jackie! i just have to say that this video was definitely something i needed to hear. i also had a very unpleasant time in high school -- though for very different reasons. i was very depressed to the point of being suicidal and my self-worth was very, very low, and i became very closed off. my grades and my social life suffered to the point that i couldn't graduate high school with my friends because i had failed too many classes. needless to say it was not a fun experience for me. the summer after school ended i stopped talking to a lot of my friends and just retreated way more into myself; i decided to move to las vegas with my mom after a fight with my dad -- which i should not have done.
i love my mom, she's not a bad person, but she's not a good mom. she's the reason where a lot of my self-esteem issues stem from. growing she would often pick at me for being too "lazy" or forgetful or clumsy, and rely on me to do a lot of the parenting for my younger siblings -- all while drilling at me that i wouldn't be loved if i wasn't pretty or thin enough. it's honestly a miracle that i didn't develop a serious eating disorder while being around her. thank god my dad has always been the complete opposite, completely supportive and caring, or else who knows what might have become of me.
i only lasted about 6 months with my mom after high school before it all became to much and i decided to stay in tijuana with my dad again after coming to visit for my birthday that year. i have struggled a lot with my mental health since then -- like A LOT. it's been almost four years now and i finally feel like i'm on a good path, and i had to learn that i do need a lot more outside help than i would like to admit. with a lot of support from my dad i have finally decided to pursue my long time dream of going to beauty school -- and it's been great! i'm finally going out more, seeing my friends more often and no longer spending all day exclusively online.
it's been YEARS since i felt this good about myself, i can't believe i've actually managed to even make new friendships that aren't online and even reconnecting with old friends that i've missed. i know from an outside perspective it seems insignificant, but i know inside that i've made progress because i feel *good* and proud, even if i've only accomplished very little. it's still something, y'know. it's still progress -- even if it's taken basically cutting out my mom out of my life.
anyway, this got super rambly, but i just wanted to say thank you for sharing your story, it really hit home for me. and you are absolutely right; we can't judge a book just by its cover. on the outside i might seem a little ditzy and kind of happy-go-lucky, but i've struggled a lot mentally and that's just the front i decide to put on so other people don't see the insecurities.
you're such a beautiful soul Jackie and I really hope that you find healing. You're such an inspiration to me and many others! I know you may feel alone, but I think anyone would be lucky to have you in their lives and soon you'll find your people
Aw thanks Hannah, you are so sweet!
Wow. Your story mirrors my own so much and just watching this helps me feel understood- thank you for being brave and sharing ❤️
This is so powerful. I’m so proud of you for sharing. I’ve been out of a toxic relationship for almost 2 years and it was the hardest thing to go throug, but in the long run, the best thing that could’ve happened. Love you, prayin for you to find yourself the right way. Jeremiah 29:11 💖
Nothing but respect after watching this ❤ I've been watching your videos for a long time, and I would never tell something serious was happenig. It's very scary how we are able to hide such a huge part of our life. After dealing with some difficulties myself, I believe the best we can do is talk and let it out of our system. As for "running away", I also believe we have to find our place in the world, where we feel safe and confortabel, no matter how many moves it takes. I hope New York will be that safe space for you ❤ All the love xx
Thanks Sara, I hid so much from everyone, my family included & being so secretive was exhausting! Talking & letting go is helpful for sure, thanks for the love
We are all with you,you can heal.I love you,sending you all of my best wishes and love in this world 💙💙💙💛💛💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💪💪💙💙💙💛💛💛💙💙💙💙💛❤❤💚💜💜💜💜💚💚💜💜💜💕💕💕💞💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💜💙💛💎💎💎💎💙💙💛💛💛💛💙💙💕💓💓💘💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💘💘💘💘💘💘💞💖💕💓💋💋💚💜💙💙💛💛💙💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💙💙💜💖💚💙💖💖💖💖💖💙💙💙💛
Thank you for sharing your story ❤️ you’re so full of love and light and you’re an amazing girl! Keep shining your light. ❤️
Yay! NYC is where I am from, would love to hang out. You're so relatable and I felt what you said right in the beginning about making the video, and just doing it, and how if you think so much about it you won't do it haha. Life is just, wild lol.
Love you Jackie! So glad you posted this video. It’s so relatable. It definitely helped me 💖
I’m so so proud of you, thank you for sharing your experiences. I can’t imagine how difficult it is. This means so much to you I’m sure and to so many of us. You are strong as hell, a beautiful human being and an inspiration. Love you 💗
Be strong, Jackie! We all have a difficult time in our life :) You are a wonderful person and you should be proud of yourself. Easier said than done I know, but we need to just keep moving forward :)