I think a lot of people tend to overthink relationships. For me the most important first step is to get to know the other person, not the facade, but the persons true self with all it’s strength and flaws, needs and dreams. This is of course very difficult when the other person is constantly hiding. It is hard to build any kind of relationship if there is no connection.
I’m so glad this resonated with you! It’s amazing how the right message can come at the right time. Thank you so much for subscribing-I really appreciate your support!
This video insinuates that external value is overrated. If your exterior is subpar, nobody is going to take the time to get to know your interior. Its the first layer of screening, getting your foot in the door. Presentation matters bigtime because its what determines whether or not you will even be given a chance to display your internal qualities or dismissed
every relationship is transactional. it just doesn't feel transactional when each others needs are being met without bringing it up. no such thing as unconditional love in a relationship.
"It's a game of give and take" as they say aka trading transactions. If love was unconditional then no one would be single or end up in potentially multiple relationships in their lifetime 🤣
@@SouthFloridaWoman If love isn't conditional, then why do we have to establish boundaries, non negotiables, telling someone what we *want* from them and the relationship etc Communicating such needs/wants is establishing what transactions will occur during the relationship, some you'll give up, others you won't. We're essentially saying "I'll date you if you give me these things, and I'll date you if I give you your things" When they aren't met that's when friction occurs. So kindly tell me how love it's not transactional?
It's contractual not transactional, transaction means you should exchange something you have , contractual means you have to respect said and unsaid closes , like in every interaction with anyone. @@Martyn_Wolf
"They like me so I have to give something in return to show gratitude." So me fr. Because it has to make sense. I don't have anything to offer but companionship and myself as a whole. I spent almost all of my life trying to understand people's behavior and myself. I'm not conventionally attractive, I'm not 🤓. I can't even speak in English properly. I experienced men/boy liking me for my body or how I look tho it doesn't make sense to me because my definition of sexy / attractive is different from how I look. I don't easily get insecure unless you're my partner and you're giving out your attention to others. I'll open up about it and if you don't stop it I'll do the same to others so things will be balanced (at least that's how I see it). I'm not rich at all in any aspect of life but I can genuinely say that I can like/admire or even love a person (/people) for who they are because that's just who I am. I can easily find good in others. But I find it hard to see that in myself.
Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt and honest comment. It's clear that you've spent a lot of time reflecting on yourself and your relationships, and that level of self-awareness is incredibly valuable. It's okay to feel the way you do, and you're definitely not alone in these thoughts. Recognizing the good in others is a beautiful trait, but remember, the same goodness exists within you too. It's just a matter of allowing yourself to see it. Your worth isn't defined by material things or conventional standards-your genuine care and ability to love are what truly make you special. Stay true to who you are, and thank you for being so open.
You more describe entire consumeristic society ...then just "* her parents". We live in a very fast and thus superficial society , where speed determines : a lack of time to go into some depth ... . so Entire society is Superficial Narcissistic Manipulative Exploitative and Additionaly ... full of nice , positive TALK =[(*gaslighting). Good Luck 🍀
Idk if this is weird but I don't feel the need to be accepted by others but I don't want to be alone 🤷. I just need a family of my own. Because I believe family ties are ♾️.
Can rejection from people outside one's family have the same effect of low self-esteem in an individual? I relate alot to your video but I had good parents who loved me for who I am.
Yes, rejection from people outside of one’s family can definitely impact self-esteem. Even with loving and supportive parents, experiences with peers, romantic partners, or others in your life can still influence how you see yourself. Rejection, especially if it happens repeatedly, can lead to feelings of inadequacy or self-doubt, regardless of your family background. It’s great that you had supportive parents, but it’s completely valid to feel affected by rejection from others. I’ll be diving into this topic more in future videos, so stay tuned!
The older you get, the more transactional love becomes. No such thing as true love or a soul mates. Human psychology hasn’t changed, all about resources for women and passing your genes on for men.
I think a lot of people tend to overthink relationships. For me the most important first step is to get to know the other person, not the facade, but the persons true self with all it’s strength and flaws, needs and dreams. This is of course very difficult when the other person is constantly hiding. It is hard to build any kind of relationship if there is no connection.
I overthink everything
Damn parenthood plays an important role.
oh my god i don't know why this popped up on my feed but this is EXACTLY what i needed to hear omfg i'm gonna subscribe thank u so much
I’m so glad this resonated with you! It’s amazing how the right message can come at the right time. Thank you so much for subscribing-I really appreciate your support!
This video insinuates that external value is overrated. If your exterior is subpar, nobody is going to take the time to get to know your interior. Its the first layer of screening, getting your foot in the door. Presentation matters bigtime because its what determines whether or not you will even be given a chance to display your internal qualities or dismissed
every relationship is transactional. it just doesn't feel transactional when each others needs are being met without bringing it up. no such thing as unconditional love in a relationship.
"It's a game of give and take" as they say aka trading transactions.
If love was unconditional then no one would be single or end up in potentially multiple relationships in their lifetime 🤣
I'm sorry you feel this way
So sad.
@@SouthFloridaWoman If love isn't conditional, then why do we have to establish boundaries, non negotiables, telling someone what we *want* from them and the relationship etc
Communicating such needs/wants is establishing what transactions will occur during the relationship, some you'll give up, others you won't. We're essentially saying "I'll date you if you give me these things, and I'll date you if I give you your things"
When they aren't met that's when friction occurs.
So kindly tell me how love it's not transactional?
It's contractual not transactional, transaction means you should exchange something you have , contractual means you have to respect said and unsaid closes , like in every interaction with anyone. @@Martyn_Wolf
"They like me so I have to give something in return to show gratitude." So me fr. Because it has to make sense. I don't have anything to offer but companionship and myself as a whole.
I spent almost all of my life trying to understand people's behavior and myself.
I'm not conventionally attractive, I'm not 🤓. I can't even speak in English properly.
I experienced men/boy liking me for my body or how I look tho it doesn't make sense to me because my definition of sexy / attractive is different from how I look.
I don't easily get insecure unless you're my partner and you're giving out your attention to others. I'll open up about it and if you don't stop it I'll do the same to others so things will be balanced (at least that's how I see it).
I'm not rich at all in any aspect of life but I can genuinely say that I can like/admire or even love a person (/people) for who they are because that's just who I am. I can easily find good in others. But I find it hard to see that in myself.
Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt and honest comment. It's clear that you've spent a lot of time reflecting on yourself and your relationships, and that level of self-awareness is incredibly valuable. It's okay to feel the way you do, and you're definitely not alone in these thoughts. Recognizing the good in others is a beautiful trait, but remember, the same goodness exists within you too. It's just a matter of allowing yourself to see it. Your worth isn't defined by material things or conventional standards-your genuine care and ability to love are what truly make you special. Stay true to who you are, and thank you for being so open.
You more describe entire consumeristic society ...then
just "* her parents".
We live in a very fast and thus superficial society , where speed determines :
a lack of time to go into some depth ... .
so
Entire society is
Superficial
Narcissistic
Manipulative
Exploitative and
Additionaly
... full of nice , positive TALK =[(*gaslighting).
Good Luck 🍀
Idk if this is weird but I don't feel the need to be accepted by others but I don't want to be alone 🤷. I just need a family of my own. Because I believe family ties are ♾️.
@@RafReyes1993 I think friends can become family too. It‘s about feeling at home with someone.
Your videos have helped me a lot, thank you so much!
I'm so glad to hear that my videos have been helpful to you! Thank you for watching and for your support-it really means a lot to me.
Can rejection from people outside one's family have the same effect of low self-esteem in an individual?
I relate alot to your video but I had good parents who loved me for who I am.
Yes, rejection from people outside of one’s family can definitely impact self-esteem. Even with loving and supportive parents, experiences with peers, romantic partners, or others in your life can still influence how you see yourself. Rejection, especially if it happens repeatedly, can lead to feelings of inadequacy or self-doubt, regardless of your family background. It’s great that you had supportive parents, but it’s completely valid to feel affected by rejection from others. I’ll be diving into this topic more in future videos, so stay tuned!
Close, you missed a few things, but one can never truly cover everything in this format
The older you get, the more transactional love becomes.
No such thing as true love or a soul mates.
Human psychology hasn’t changed, all about resources for women and passing your genes on for men.