I'm sorry that you had to grieve this person's untimely death. I felt the same weird sadness when Paul Harrell passed away a few weeks ago. I still watch his videos for guidance on firearms safety and training, and it's sad knowing he won't get to share more of his knowledge and experience with us.
When Trevor Moore died that was out of nowhere and crazy, and there was a conspiracy with how that happened as well. So yea, I feel ya. Him and his youtube channel and friends, the whitest kids you know, live on tho, and thats dope. but yea, wishing you the best through this tough time, and rest in peace to your idol, she sounds great.
@@WatchDoggyDogWhat especially hurt for me is that nobody I knew directly knew about wkuk. It felt like I was the only one who knew this guy ever existed or even cared. RIP Civil war stoner, you magnificent bastard, may it forever be Saturday for you.
Mitten Squad's "Paul" was taken WAY the hell too soon. Christ, I'm from the mitten myself and never met up with the guy. Fallout and gaming as a whole is worse off now that he's no longer with us.
A lot of my older relatives have been dying since I was a kid. I'm the baby child of two baby children, so some of my relatives are extremely old. My aunt just died on Friday and as much as I hate to say it, I feel quite unattached. It's not until much later when I start to feel any sort of emotions related to someone's passing. I'm not sure if it's numbness to death since I've seen it from a young age, or if it's my own emotional issues that I haven't worked out yet, but I tend to deject any emotions related to death or grieving until much later, usually when I'm having some kind of existential crisis or mental breakdown. I think because of being in introverted person with anxiety and depression who has learned to mask a lot of emotions just to act like I can fit in with people, it's hard for me to fully process death the way others can. The same goes for people I don't know, although sometimes I do find myself more emotional because of how much I enjoyed their art/content. Even when I don't know them personally it makes sense to grieve or feel weird about them dying since they were a person in your life that entertained you and were frequently involved in your day to day life. Perhaps it's the frequency of a person's involvement in your life that can be a factor in how hard the grieving process is or how much of a shock it might be to hear of their passing.
This is why I try to never hold grudges and let things go towards other people. You never know what someone else is going through at the end of the day, and tomorrow isn't promised for any of us.
I have just found your channel and i love the setting, lighting and your approach. I am sorry to hear about the passing. It helps to reflect on the past like this to help us make sense of life and move on. I went through the same process about another public figure. I am still trying to overcome it after 15 years with depression. My journey was more difficult because of Autism Spectrum Disorder ASD.
This is a real shame and tragedy, I can recall feeling terrible when my grandpa passed, pray for her that the Lord have mercy on her for such a tragic act.
Bless your heart, you are so sensitive and good person. It’s so sad to hear that someone has taken their own life. Channels like yours can help someone to find peace with this life and stay here. Let your life shine! Keep on keeping on!
People have different inner worlds. Most people choose not to show them. If you take the time to observe someone's energy you will see who they truly are and what they are going through, throughout my time i met tons of people who seemed to have it all and once i took a better look at them, i saw how depressed and broken they were, some of them even had really bad mental breakdowns at some point cause they couldn't handle their inner world. Only way to handle things is through meditation ( using healing hand signs ) followed by healing frequencies. My point is take care of your inner self people. I came across your channel randomly, i hope you find your peace in life if you haven't already . 333
Some of the "happiest" people are really the ones who suffer the most. So much so that they often desperately look for ways to mask their suffering to the extent where they have to force themselves to be happy, eventually putting themselves in an emotional psychosis where they genuinely believe they are happy. But when the source of that happiness dies. They are reminded of the pain they tried to mask, and sometimes, that emotional juxtaposition is too much. They dont want to go back to that pit of depression. You must deal with negative feelings and trauma head on. You cant ignore those feelings and repress those emotions. Lying to yourself wont end well. But no one wants to suffer. RIP
You learn alot about a person's character by how they react to someones misfortune. You have a good heart ❤️ and its clear for all to see you'll have a great life, even if at times you think otherwise. Your one of the good ones, while everyone else is faking it your putting it out there for all to see. You put us all to shame beautiful.
I lost my best friend since we were 8 and my brother a few months apart last year. The only thing I can imagine that will hurt worse is when my mother goes! I hope you feel better, I hate seeing people sad!! It always seems the people that appear the happiest and most caring of others fight the worst internal battles!
Ain't that the truth. I'm sorry for your loss. It couldn't have been easy. Best thing you can do is just take it day by day and keep them in your heart. Better days are ahead.
I've buried many loved ones, including an infant, so I am well acquainted with grief. There is overwhelming secular evidence that we continue beyond the failure of our bodies. It doesn't take away all the pain, but is eternally true.
Wow. Thank you for sharing. Harrowing to look through her channel, i've watched some of her videos in the new channel and it's crazy to see it documented.
Everyone deals with grief differently.. not knowing someone personally depends on the impact that person had on your life.. your life influences others
I had a friend who self-terminated when we were early teenagers. I did not grieve, however, because I knew from a very young age that we never really die. He was young, as was I (13 y/o). He was someone's child. He had loving, hard working parents. He had friends who cared about him. He had more than one girlfriend. He made an attempt earlier on to self-terminate, and when I realized it, I told him that he should stop, and I told him that he is loved, and his family loves him, and his friends care about him. He mocked me when I said these things. He ridiculed me. And he cursed at me over, and over and over. A few weeks after this attempt, he succeeded. I didn't go to his funeral but my class mates did. They judged me for not attending but I felt I did not owe them an explanation they wouldn't have understood. .
I've attempted deletion, and during that timeframe I felt like a slave to my emotions and like another person. Afterwards I regretted all the attempts, but it took some psych drugs, hospital time, and destressing when I got out. There was another person who denied their mental illness, that was part of my mental trigger, who never admitted they had mental problems, who put my stress levels through the roof. I just didn't want to exist and this thought perpetuated itself, like compulsion. It was a dark period and I wish that noone has to experience that, but events do happen. Self-deletion is never the answer, but if you lose a loved one, to self-deletion, realize they were a slave to their amygdala, and they got into a compulsive thought trap, where only 1 thing is on the mind, and they don't really want that thing they are obsessed with. It's like a person having a seizure. They don't want to bite their tongue, but it might happen cause their body is going through something really stressful. Someone who is thinking heavily about self deletion, should lovingly be convinced to go to the hospital, until drugs, rest and food can lower their stress levels. ❤✝️🥰
A video of yours showed up in my search bar from 9months back. Your channel is so raw and I truly see the human being in front of me and I wanted to say that. I see you.
Am sorry for the loss of your favorite UA-camr, I defiantly understand the pain of losing someone, the only ones i lost that were super close to me were my great uncles. (my grandmother’s brothers) (my dad’s mom / his uncles) It’s so hard to get over the pain of losing loved ones or someone that was super close to you, hang in there keep your head up! ❤️🙏🏻
Hey i watched some of your other videos. I had much the same experience as you up til around 15-16 where my social anxiety was in its worst shape, to the point I was anxious to stand infront of the outside of the door. Now I do believe its somewhat a personality disorder but its not something that can't be helped. Im currently a university student and boulder for fun and actually enjoy going outside. The thing that helped me the most was group exercises at the time I was a teenager. Exposure is important, this paranoia like state when you are outside is extremely reminiscent of that time. I also believe it might have something to do with having been cronically online to some degree, regardless wish you the best. If you want some more tips I do have a discord.
I'm sorry for your loss and your pain. It's very sad what happened to that good woman. If someone like you appreciated her so much, she must have been very special. Stay Strong, Beautiful.
Well I like that your honest, compassionate, smart & beautiful. Prayers for those who are grieving, I know when I go thru some stuff, I turn to my Faith in Jesus & trust in Him & His Word, I’m part of a Bible study group & I volunteer & I usually go to church & I’m taking college classes. And I had a buddy of mine going thru some tuff stuff. I think it’s important that people get involved & connected with some sort of volunteering or service group. And I think men & women these days are influenced too much from social media, music, movies, video games of what a relationship is like for example swipe left then right, but that’s a false way of the purpose of marriage because the stats show that “Christian Marriage or Sacramental Marriage Covenants have less that 2 percent divorce rate & it’s because marriage takes putting Christ at the center of it, it takes work it’s no walk in the park besides, God said in the book of Genesis, “it’s not good for man to be alone.” This means that men have to learn to be in a relationship & they have to learn this from Faith on God Jesus & from their other half, a lady. Anyways may the Good Lord Jesus bless everybody today. 🙏😎
The vibes really give familiar vibes. Thats puzzling. I definitely know the feeling of loss unexpectedly, epicly crushing tbh. Yeah its heavy bearing and a irreplaceable loss with the tragedies im subject
“We are all broken,that’s how the light gets in"-Ernest Hemingway. The paradoxical thing in this quote is that Hemingway himself shot himself from a long time of depression suffering! He was one of the greatest writers of twentieth century, with a great family and yet fell into abyss state of mind that couldn’t get over it! This was hugely shocking for me when I read especially this quote until I got in this position by myself! So many people can die from a broken heart but the most powerful way to overcome this is by opening our hearts to it’s core til it feels weightless! You are a really true inspiration for doing so, I really appreciate you for sharing your authentic thoughts and concerns through your channel, it helps a lot on emotional wellbeing! May bliss be always with you young lady🙏
are you assuming she is depressed or do you know more about her than what she showed in the video? I lived through the same situation but was never depressed.
We all need to remember, what people present on Social Media is not reality, its a carefully crafted image of what each person want's to portray their life as, and most often its not as rosy behind the scenes as shown.
After viewing her video, "What it's actually like having kids...", my grief identifies with Katherine as well as her family. Witnessing her happiness and love for her family has me hoping the best for those who knew her or whom she cared for despite the tragic circumstance of her passing. She may no longer be here but her impact on the world will continue to influence those who knew her the best. 🕊
Hey. I saw your popular video. And I’m glad I’m getting to watch more of your videos. I hope you’re doing okay. It’s a sad thing when marriages don’t work out. For me as a single man, I’m hoping one day I’ll find the right one to marry. But it’s not a mission accomplished at that point. Cause horrible things can happen and boom the marriage is over. All that hard work is gone and trying to get someone to like you, it’s all for nothing.
Yes, I'm a little older than you and I've lost a number of people in my life. Sometimes it takes a while to come to terms with it and grief may be something pops up through the rest of your life. There's a good saying: "grief is not a linear process." It can be years later that something reminds you of them and you may still feel that loss. One thing I'd like to add is to be mindful that UA-cam and social media are not real life. What people post is a very curated view of their life that can be an idealized or even in some cases completely fake / hiding serious issues. At best it's only snapshots and not the full picture. It's not a good measuring stick for your own life and can create unrealistic expectations. Take care of yourself and be well!
I came across her channel back in 2019. She seemed like a happy young lady. She seemed to have a very good life. It's crazy how life can turn around this way. I don't think we should blame her for ending herself. She had her reasons. I hope she is resting in peace
1) Life as presented on social media is rarely representing the reality or full scale of it. The person has a full control of the picture so he/she chooses the bits that benefit his/her intended impression. 2) Yes I lost people I admired both on-line and in life, including my mother when I was 25. It's just life, that is how it is, it's an irreversible fact and one must go on.
You aren't wrong, but I think it's also important to avoid trivializing such horrific tragedies. Losing your mother for instance. That's horrible at any age let alone 25. I hope you've processed it in a healthy manner.
@@jacobwilliams6365 I by no means trivialise it. It was one of the biggest changes in my life. From a loser in mamahotel to a grown adult who has suddenly without any preparation start to take responsibility for his life. Twenty years down the line I may say I did just that. I have my own kids and l live my life. But I'm not here to promote myself let alone brag, I'm by no means perfect nor ideal person. I just know that whatever happens, life's go on. Take whatever you can from every experience and march on.
@@DopravniPoradceAlso, I'm terribly sorry if it seemed like I was accusing you of downplaying the tragedy you went through. I meant grieving in general. I'm not as good at socializing or communication as I'd prefer to be and I may have misspoke. That's on me.
Life is hard , if you get wrapped up in your fav you tuber 's misfortune you do yourself a grave disservice. Remember the joy of this person's life and forget the tragedy please. You can't let these external happenings retard your own progress with depressive mood swings that stop you in your tracks. Time marches on young woman, time to go out and explore your surroundings. Try to smile more---and show it around.You got a great smile.
My sister’s ex and his family have been trying to drive my sister to unalive herself, taking her kids away, accusing her of false things. They have a lot of money and it’s awful , money and influence can sways the courts, it can change things for the bread winner, a nasty divorce can be truly awful
Thankfully, I haven't been through that but I can say there are few youtubers that I admire alot - for their thoughts, values, ideals... I can resonate with what they are saying and it would affect me în some ways if something bad would happen to them These emotions can range from sympathy to as one put it în a previous comment, a "crush", depending from case to case. (în my case is more like sympathy) I can understand you perfectly Best wishes and warm salutes...
Just gotta keep moving along. I’m living under circumstances that I’m commited to finishing those circumstances then I quite honestly will be checking out myself. I’ve got a lot of problems all the way around though. Mental and throughout my nervous system. It should be easy since I’ve got no friends that I need to go through what’s going to happen being honest. It’s a shame u weren’t able to help her before she left. I’ve reached out to many many many old friends that even though we aren’t friends anymore they still are important to me. They couldnt care less about me. The amount of support I didn’t get from reaching out was actually quite crazy and only added to the long history of depression. I hope again u see an opportunity like this to be involved with someone before they’re gone because that is would could have saved me from making this decision a few years ago and nobody was there. You never know just how much ur brief chats to someone mean to them. Could be the reason they’re still breathing. Keep your chin up
I watched a youtuber growing up called Total Biscuit who was almost like a cool uncle/big brother figure to me. Even though it was obviously 100% parasocial. He passed away from cancer and it was really rough seeing him get progressively sicker. There was also a twitch streamer called Reckful who unfortunately passed away. He was very depressed and struggled with manic episodes. It's really sad because the last thing he said on his live stream was that he wanted his viewers to become friends beyond his livestream.
Loners become overly attached. Edit ~ Ive noticed that people who have rosy lives end them when things finally turn sour and people who always suffered carry on.
It's important to be thankful when times are good, things are good until they aren't, the small problems we had in good times seem unimportant. It is no wonder you have simpathetic grief for someone you had authentic affection, sorry for your pain. KNOW GOD know Peace...
@5:55 I relate deeply to feeling strange about... feeling like I love someone before I've even met them. It's not strange. It's still real love and it's not really uncommon for anyone to do that; we do it with our celebrities for example haha ;) There's this actress I love btw... but ya, it couldn't be real love right? Because I don't know her like that lol and I've never met her so... It's a "crush" and anything more after that is just a dream.
I lost my friend in grade 4. He was my classmate too. During those days, i got an overwhelming feeling like that i wasn't living in a real world every morning i woke up.ig i wished this was all false.
I'm sorry for the You Tube community and your loss. It hurts, for we all experience that severe loss. It's more when it's close and personal, friend, parent, direct family member. Remember that simeone who cares will listen. Not to fill space and time but actually sympathizes with and for you. Stay well.
I have lost some close people and the older I get the moreso---Robin Williams demise hit me hardest of a person I didnt know, because of his seemingly loving and tender personality towards everyone
When people die, the only way to keep their influence alive is to remember the wonderful things they provided for us all and to see what they aspired to, if judged as righteous.. it would be great if we could also help out making it easier for others who pursue similar things. We all die in this world, might as well make it a better place.
As a genX in the so-called truther community, I have heard of men and women who have passed in the same fashion, which is unbelievable to me, is seemed like they had it all as they were maybe too smart for their own good, idk.
By the way, something I'm seeing in the comments are things like "you don't know what people are going through" which, is true in a general sense and there are parts of it that apply to this particular instance as well; but like, i think the most harrowing part of it all is the fact that in her case, i feel like you can actually see that she was going through so much, she said several times that she felt so alone, that she struggled with parasociality, that she had no friends, no family, etc, you can see her bids for connection and support and her attempts at achieving independence, her divorce post, her posts about intrusive thoughts. RIP.
That's shitty... RIP Catherine Ann. No one really knows what's going on in someone's head when something like this happens. She may have seemed happy and outgoing, but that's just the face she puts on for the world. She wants to keep her suffering to herself, because she doesn't want to be a burden on anyone. I've thought about ending it all myself for several years, and even had a plan. Never told anyone anything about it. I would've just ended up dead somewhere. I've thought about it more recently after being diagnosed with HIV. They told me I had 6 years to live, so I thought that I would have to end it to save my wife from the suffering and financial hardship it would bring. Then I became undetectable and was like "FUCK ENDING IT, I'VE GOT 30+ YEARS LEFT IN ME!". Now I'd never end it unless it helped my wife in some way, so that my sacrifice was worth it.
I may be guessing here but she may not have been able to handle where the divorce left her so vulnerable after being so happy, she committed suicide .You don't have this curve at all, I hope you just keep on an upward trajectory towards being free from your phobias and anxieties, and I hope somewhere in that trajectory you meet a suitable man and you guys have an enduring and long happy marriage.
Wasn't familiar with her but I have had the YT experience. Watched a fix-it video for my Mazda truck and went to drop a comment but the guy had died two years previous 😐 Really stuck with me. Keep your chin up, life goes.
You’re cute and your honesty really shines through, that quality alone would make many men happy to be with you 😊me included. That’s attractive to me , you’re not someone who pretends to be someone else , you know you have flaws like we all do but you’re open to them, you don’t hide it , I find that really attractive, you’re not stupid , I would date you in a heartbeat 💗 many would. I think you’re beautiful 😊
A similar thing is happening now. There's this UA-camr named Mister Metokur who was diagnosed a couple years ago with a slew of different terminal illnesses, including cancer. He has deteriorated greatly & it's a miracle that he has lasted as long as he has since his diagnoses. It is likely that he'll pass sooner rather than later. Metokur, or Jim as he is also known; is known for his comedic UA-cam analysis videos, usually about crazy people online or a cultural topic. Sadly, he has had to remove his videos from his channel, as they are not politically correct, so modern UA-cam wouldn't like them. He also has a great deal of haters too, who would love to see his channel taken down; where, although he doesn't post videos anymore, he still does do occasional livestreams. It will be a sad day indeed when he does inevitably leave this world.
And on a random note, please don't follow Katherine's path with this California boyfriend. If you find yourself alone in a new city and estranged from your family for someone's half-baked affection it would be the same situation. I know you're strong, but none of us even want to see the possibility of another tragedy like that.
You are an amazing person! In all seriousness, I think we were made for each other. I've never met anyone like you. So honest, kind, compassionate, contemplative, intelligent, empathetic, and beautiful 😍. I'm so sorry for your pain, I wish I could take you into my arms and hold you close, keeping the wolves ay bay. Hope this message makes you smile. If more women were as genuine as you, maybe I wouldn't feel so alone. Shine on you crazy diamond... shine on!
Recently, a very very good firearms UA-camr named Paul Harrell died of pancreatic cancer. His last video was posted after he died, which he recorded in December, called "I'm dead". People knew he had cancer and he was dying, and he did videos as long as he could as he was withering away from it.
Ya it’s crazy how emotionally attached you can get to someone on an IPAD screen. The internet is a lonely place . This one woman I followed for years died . This other woman isn’t doing podcasts anymore and is fading away
You are wonderfull! I find your sincerity to be very poetic. In fact I also would love to become your friend somewhere. We could talk about poetry, books, or music, and this strange thing called life! You are not alone in the struggle! Hugs from city of Warsaw. Peter
I am in a bad state of mind and close to ending my own life. I understand why Katherine did what she did. This rant is very parasocial but I saw her last videos on UA-cam and felt for her. But no one was helping her, and the people around her neglected her for years. She was bright, sweet, happy, and strong, but she was forcing herself to be that way. She was raising two kids nearly alone and managing an entire social media presence on UA-cam and TikTok. The comments on her videos criticised her to the extreme, and that broke her. She also mentioned that her husband would take the only car they had to work in the morning and come back with it in the evening. So she was trapped in the house they owned for five years, only able to take the car to go out and buy groceries. There was also some level of postpartum depression, and other mental health issues she developed after having kids that nobody noticed, her husband seemed to be completely ignorant of her emotional state and left most of how the kids were taken care of to her, and after the divorce she was having money problems, was addicted to social media, where people were basically calling her crazy. Her visit to the mental facility also did not help at all, maybe because of the financial problems or her missing her girls. It is totally understandable why she would end her own life or just die due to health problems, could also be an overdose, because she did mention using drugs before.
Yeah, that happened to my favorite cousin. She was the happy one, she was the one who had it all together. Then she went out in the woods and shot herself, no warning (that we could see).
Yeah I had a utuber recently as of last year die. His channel started out teaching men the realities of what society falsely expects you to become, kinda like “red pill” stuff. He was very smart and intuitive! I loved this guy! Unfortunately he was living in Ukraine and started reporting what was really happening contradicting what the main stream media was reporting. The Ukraine government objected to his reporting and imprisoned him in, he died in the prison supposedly from pneumonia. I really looked up to him, he had life figured out! To deal with the loss, I go back a rewatch his videos and keep his philosophy close.
Grant from the King of Random UA-cam channel died a few years ago, that was hard, he left behind a wife and kids. I remember watching him from his early days, one of his videos was even just camping with his kids. They had 10 million subscribers when he died. Unfortunately after his death the UA-cam channel has really changed and is now a former shell of what it was with Grant running things.
You thought you had it bad, but those people we sometimes look up to have it far far worse. Try and set A better example by not ever giving it to whatever life throws at you no matter the loss.
I don't like the idea of comparison, but it is true that you never truly know what someone is going through, so it's worth spreading as much kindness as you can while also remembering to be kind to yourself.
This channel named Dr. Dan got cancer a few years ago, luckily his brother was able to post on his channel and tell people what happened. He even posted his memorial service, but most of the time nobody knows when people online pass away.
I'm sorry that you had to grieve this person's untimely death. I felt the same weird sadness when Paul Harrell passed away a few weeks ago. I still watch his videos for guidance on firearms safety and training, and it's sad knowing he won't get to share more of his knowledge and experience with us.
Rest in peace Kathrine Ann 🙏.
How many of you experienced grieving? How about an instance where you didn’t personally know the individual?
When Trevor Moore died that was out of nowhere and crazy, and there was a conspiracy with how that happened as well. So yea, I feel ya. Him and his youtube channel and friends, the whitest kids you know, live on tho, and thats dope. but yea, wishing you the best through this tough time, and rest in peace to your idol, she sounds great.
@@WatchDoggyDogWhat especially hurt for me is that nobody I knew directly knew about wkuk. It felt like I was the only one who knew this guy ever existed or even cared. RIP Civil war stoner, you magnificent bastard, may it forever be Saturday for you.
Mitten Squad's "Paul" was taken WAY the hell too soon. Christ, I'm from the mitten myself and never met up with the guy. Fallout and gaming as a whole is worse off now that he's no longer with us.
A lot of my older relatives have been dying since I was a kid. I'm the baby child of two baby children, so some of my relatives are extremely old. My aunt just died on Friday and as much as I hate to say it, I feel quite unattached. It's not until much later when I start to feel any sort of emotions related to someone's passing. I'm not sure if it's numbness to death since I've seen it from a young age, or if it's my own emotional issues that I haven't worked out yet, but I tend to deject any emotions related to death or grieving until much later, usually when I'm having some kind of existential crisis or mental breakdown. I think because of being in introverted person with anxiety and depression who has learned to mask a lot of emotions just to act like I can fit in with people, it's hard for me to fully process death the way others can. The same goes for people I don't know, although sometimes I do find myself more emotional because of how much I enjoyed their art/content. Even when I don't know them personally it makes sense to grieve or feel weird about them dying since they were a person in your life that entertained you and were frequently involved in your day to day life. Perhaps it's the frequency of a person's involvement in your life that can be a factor in how hard the grieving process is or how much of a shock it might be to hear of their passing.
@@jacobwilliams6365Beautifully said 🙏also "Let's go to the old folks home, we can get fucked up, and then all get stoned!"
This is why I try to never hold grudges and let things go towards other people. You never know what someone else is going through at the end of the day, and tomorrow isn't promised for any of us.
True! Everyday, Week, Month, Years is not promise to us.
I have just found your channel and i love the setting, lighting and your approach. I am sorry to hear about the passing. It helps to reflect on the past like this to help us make sense of life and move on. I went through the same process about another public figure. I am still trying to overcome it after 15 years with depression. My journey was more difficult because of Autism Spectrum Disorder ASD.
This is a real shame and tragedy, I can recall feeling terrible when my grandpa passed, pray for her that the Lord have mercy on her for such a tragic act.
Bless your heart, you are so sensitive and good person. It’s so sad to hear that someone has taken their own life. Channels like yours can help someone to find peace with this life and stay here. Let your life shine! Keep on keeping on!
People have different inner worlds. Most people choose not to show them. If you take the time to observe someone's energy you will see who they truly are and what they are going through, throughout my time i met tons of people who seemed to have it all and once i took a better look at them, i saw how depressed and broken they were, some of them even had really bad mental breakdowns at some point cause they couldn't handle their inner world. Only way to handle things is through meditation ( using healing hand signs ) followed by healing frequencies. My point is take care of your inner self people. I came across your channel randomly, i hope you find your peace in life if you haven't already . 333
You're going-to be a great Mom M.!!
😊
& Dad, will be(in my eyes), the Luckiest Guy on Earth!🙏🏽
💌
Some of the "happiest" people are really the ones who suffer the most. So much so that they often desperately look for ways to mask their suffering to the extent where they have to force themselves to be happy, eventually putting themselves in an emotional psychosis where they genuinely believe they are happy. But when the source of that happiness dies. They are reminded of the pain they tried to mask, and sometimes, that emotional juxtaposition is too much. They dont want to go back to that pit of depression. You must deal with negative feelings and trauma head on. You cant ignore those feelings and repress those emotions. Lying to yourself wont end well. But no one wants to suffer. RIP
You learn alot about a person's character by how they react to someones misfortune. You have a good heart ❤️ and its clear for all to see you'll have a great life, even if at times you think otherwise. Your one of the good ones, while everyone else is faking it your putting it out there for all to see. You put us all to shame beautiful.
You don’t know what life really is when their camera is turned off
I do! 😈 hehe 🔥
lmao so true because this utuber is literally fake. No way someone is so narrow irl it's 100% performance art.
I lost my best friend since we were 8 and my brother a few months apart last year. The only thing I can imagine that will hurt worse is when my mother goes! I hope you feel better, I hate seeing people sad!! It always seems the people that appear the happiest and most caring of others fight the worst internal battles!
Ain't that the truth. I'm sorry for your loss. It couldn't have been easy. Best thing you can do is just take it day by day and keep them in your heart. Better days are ahead.
@@jacobwilliams6365 Thanks Jacob! I truly hope your adventures in life are awesome!!
I've buried many loved ones, including an infant, so I am well acquainted with grief. There is overwhelming secular evidence that we continue beyond the failure of our bodies. It doesn't take away all the pain, but is eternally true.
Wow. Thank you for sharing. Harrowing to look through her channel, i've watched some of her videos in the new channel and it's crazy to see it documented.
Everyone deals with grief differently.. not knowing someone personally depends on the impact that person had on your life.. your life influences others
So sorry for your loss. Please accept my condolences. I know from experience it just sucks to lose somebody you love.
I Exist- As a tribute to her you keep making progress. You’re a good person and have come a long way from where you were.
I had a friend who self-terminated when we were early teenagers. I did not grieve, however, because I knew from a very young age that we never really die.
He was young, as was I (13 y/o).
He was someone's child.
He had loving, hard working parents.
He had friends who cared about him.
He had more than one girlfriend.
He made an attempt earlier on to self-terminate, and when I realized it, I told him that he should stop, and I told him that he is loved, and his family loves him, and his friends care about him. He mocked me when I said these things. He ridiculed me. And he cursed at me over, and over and over. A few weeks after this attempt, he succeeded.
I didn't go to his funeral but my class mates did. They judged me for not attending but I felt I did not owe them an explanation they wouldn't have understood.
.
I've attempted deletion, and during that timeframe I felt like a slave to my emotions and like another person. Afterwards I regretted all the attempts, but it took some psych drugs, hospital time, and destressing when I got out. There was another person who denied their mental illness, that was part of my mental trigger, who never admitted they had mental problems, who put my stress levels through the roof. I just didn't want to exist and this thought perpetuated itself, like compulsion. It was a dark period and I wish that noone has to experience that, but events do happen. Self-deletion is never the answer, but if you lose a loved one, to self-deletion, realize they were a slave to their amygdala, and they got into a compulsive thought trap, where only 1 thing is on the mind, and they don't really want that thing they are obsessed with. It's like a person having a seizure. They don't want to bite their tongue, but it might happen cause their body is going through something really stressful. Someone who is thinking heavily about self deletion, should lovingly be convinced to go to the hospital, until drugs, rest and food can lower their stress levels. ❤✝️🥰
A video of yours showed up in my search bar from 9months back. Your channel is so raw and I truly see the human being in front of me and I wanted to say that. I see you.
Am sorry for the loss of your favorite UA-camr, I defiantly understand the pain of losing someone, the only ones i lost that were super close to me were my great uncles.
(my grandmother’s brothers)
(my dad’s mom / his uncles)
It’s so hard to get over the pain of losing loved ones or someone that was super close to you, hang in there keep your head up! ❤️🙏🏻
Hey i watched some of your other videos. I had much the same experience as you up til around 15-16 where my social anxiety was in its worst shape, to the point I was anxious to stand infront of the outside of the door. Now I do believe its somewhat a personality disorder but its not something that can't be helped. Im currently a university student and boulder for fun and actually enjoy going outside. The thing that helped me the most was group exercises at the time I was a teenager. Exposure is important, this paranoia like state when you are outside is extremely reminiscent of that time. I also believe it might have something to do with having been cronically online to some degree, regardless wish you the best. If you want some more tips I do have a discord.
not her but if you are still offering id like some support
@@mushroom-rl5lw sure what is your discord?
I'm sorry for your loss and your pain. It's very sad what happened to that good woman. If someone like you appreciated her so much, she must have been very special. Stay Strong, Beautiful.
Well I like that your honest, compassionate, smart & beautiful. Prayers for those who are grieving, I know when I go thru some stuff, I turn to my Faith in Jesus & trust in Him & His Word, I’m part of a Bible study group & I volunteer & I usually go to church & I’m taking college classes. And I had a buddy of mine going thru some tuff stuff. I think it’s important that people get involved & connected with some sort of volunteering or service group. And I think men & women these days are influenced too much from social media, music, movies, video games of what a relationship is like for example swipe left then right, but that’s a false way of the purpose of marriage because the stats show that “Christian Marriage or Sacramental Marriage Covenants have less that 2 percent divorce rate & it’s because marriage takes putting Christ at the center of it, it takes work it’s no walk in the park besides, God said in the book of Genesis, “it’s not good for man to be alone.” This means that men have to learn to be in a relationship & they have to learn this from Faith on God Jesus & from their other half, a lady. Anyways may the Good Lord Jesus bless everybody today. 🙏😎
The vibes really give familiar vibes. Thats puzzling. I definitely know the feeling of loss unexpectedly, epicly crushing tbh. Yeah its heavy bearing and a irreplaceable loss with the tragedies im subject
“We are all broken,that’s how the light gets in"-Ernest Hemingway. The paradoxical thing in this quote is that Hemingway himself shot himself from a long time of depression suffering! He was one of the greatest writers of twentieth century, with a great family and yet fell into abyss state of mind that couldn’t get over it! This was hugely shocking for me when I read especially this quote until I got in this position by myself! So many people can die from a broken heart but the most powerful way to overcome this is by opening our hearts to it’s core til it feels weightless! You are a really true inspiration for doing so, I really appreciate you for sharing your authentic thoughts and concerns through your channel, it helps a lot on emotional wellbeing! May bliss be always with you young lady🙏
are you assuming she is depressed or do you know more about her than what she showed in the video? I lived through the same situation but was never depressed.
It's always the best people who leave us first.
We all need to remember, what people present on Social Media is not reality, its a carefully crafted image of what each person want's to portray their life as, and most often its not as rosy behind the scenes as shown.
So true!
After viewing her video, "What it's actually like having kids...", my grief identifies with Katherine as well as her family. Witnessing her happiness and love for her family has me hoping the best for those who knew her or whom she cared for despite the tragic circumstance of her passing. She may no longer be here but her impact on the world will continue to influence those who knew her the best. 🕊
Hey. I saw your popular video. And I’m glad I’m getting to watch more of your videos. I hope you’re doing okay. It’s a sad thing when marriages don’t work out. For me as a single man, I’m hoping one day I’ll find the right one to marry. But it’s not a mission accomplished at that point. Cause horrible things can happen and boom the marriage is over. All that hard work is gone and trying to get someone to like you, it’s all for nothing.
Yes, I'm a little older than you and I've lost a number of people in my life. Sometimes it takes a while to come to terms with it and grief may be something pops up through the rest of your life. There's a good saying: "grief is not a linear process." It can be years later that something reminds you of them and you may still feel that loss. One thing I'd like to add is to be mindful that UA-cam and social media are not real life. What people post is a very curated view of their life that can be an idealized or even in some cases completely fake / hiding serious issues. At best it's only snapshots and not the full picture. It's not a good measuring stick for your own life and can create unrealistic expectations. Take care of yourself and be well!
I came across her channel back in 2019. She seemed like a happy young lady. She seemed to have a very good life. It's crazy how life can turn around this way. I don't think we should blame her for ending herself. She had her reasons. I hope she is resting in peace
1) Life as presented on social media is rarely representing the reality or full scale of it. The person has a full control of the picture so he/she chooses the bits that benefit his/her intended impression.
2) Yes I lost people I admired both on-line and in life, including my mother when I was 25. It's just life, that is how it is, it's an irreversible fact and one must go on.
You aren't wrong, but I think it's also important to avoid trivializing such horrific tragedies. Losing your mother for instance. That's horrible at any age let alone 25. I hope you've processed it in a healthy manner.
@@jacobwilliams6365 I by no means trivialise it. It was one of the biggest changes in my life. From a loser in mamahotel to a grown adult who has suddenly without any preparation start to take responsibility for his life. Twenty years down the line I may say I did just that. I have my own kids and l live my life. But I'm not here to promote myself let alone brag, I'm by no means perfect nor ideal person. I just know that whatever happens, life's go on. Take whatever you can from every experience and march on.
@@DopravniPoradceWords of wisdom right here!
@@DopravniPoradceAlso, I'm terribly sorry if it seemed like I was accusing you of downplaying the tragedy you went through. I meant grieving in general. I'm not as good at socializing or communication as I'd prefer to be and I may have misspoke. That's on me.
@@jacobwilliams6365 Don't worry, no harm done. You're a good guy.
Life is hard , if you get wrapped up in your fav you tuber 's misfortune you do yourself a grave disservice. Remember the joy of this person's life and forget the tragedy please. You can't let these external happenings retard your own progress with depressive mood swings that stop you in your tracks. Time marches on young woman, time to go out and explore your surroundings. Try to smile more---and show it around.You got a great smile.
My sister’s ex and his family have been trying to drive my sister to unalive herself, taking her kids away, accusing her of false things. They have a lot of money and it’s awful , money and influence can sways the courts, it can change things for the bread winner, a nasty divorce can be truly awful
Thankfully, I haven't been through that but I can say there are few youtubers that I admire alot - for their thoughts, values, ideals...
I can resonate with what they are saying and it would affect me în some ways if something bad would happen to them
These emotions can range from sympathy to as one put it în a previous comment, a "crush", depending from case to case. (în my case is more like sympathy)
I can understand you perfectly
Best wishes and warm salutes...
Just gotta keep moving along. I’m living under circumstances that I’m commited to finishing those circumstances then I quite honestly will be checking out myself. I’ve got a lot of problems all the way around though. Mental and throughout my nervous system. It should be easy since I’ve got no friends that I need to go through what’s going to happen being honest. It’s a shame u weren’t able to help her before she left. I’ve reached out to many many many old friends that even though we aren’t friends anymore they still are important to me. They couldnt care less about me. The amount of support I didn’t get from reaching out was actually quite crazy and only added to the long history of depression.
I hope again u see an opportunity like this to be involved with someone before they’re gone because that is would could have saved me from making this decision a few years ago and nobody was there. You never know just how much ur brief chats to someone mean to them. Could be the reason they’re still breathing. Keep your chin up
oh yeah... lil peeps death on my 16th birthday.. I still listen to him 24/7 all day to never forget him and keep his legacy going.
I watched a youtuber growing up called Total Biscuit who was almost like a cool uncle/big brother figure to me. Even though it was obviously 100% parasocial. He passed away from cancer and it was really rough seeing him get progressively sicker. There was also a twitch streamer called Reckful who unfortunately passed away. He was very depressed and struggled with manic episodes. It's really sad because the last thing he said on his live stream was that he wanted his viewers to become friends beyond his livestream.
Im sorry about your loss im no stranger to loss i can relate
Loners become overly attached.
Edit ~ Ive noticed that people who have rosy lives end them when things finally turn sour and people who always suffered carry on.
My condolences. Sorry for your loss.
Ar dheis De go raibh si.
Girl you’re pure and beautiful ❤
It's important to be thankful when times are good, things are good until they aren't, the small problems we had in good times seem unimportant. It is no wonder you have simpathetic grief for someone you had authentic affection, sorry for your pain. KNOW GOD know Peace...
@5:55 I relate deeply to feeling strange about... feeling like I love someone before I've even met them. It's not strange. It's still real love and it's not really uncommon for anyone to do that; we do it with our celebrities for example haha ;)
There's this actress I love btw... but ya, it couldn't be real love right? Because I don't know her like that lol and I've never met her so... It's a "crush" and anything more after that is just a dream.
you made me almost cry when you mention you wished you could've "talked to her" haha
I lost my friend in grade 4. He was my classmate too. During those days, i got an overwhelming feeling like that i wasn't living in a real world every morning i woke up.ig i wished this was all false.
I'm sorry for the You Tube community and your loss. It hurts, for we all experience that severe loss. It's more when it's close and personal, friend, parent, direct family member. Remember that simeone who cares will listen. Not to fill space and time but actually sympathizes with and for you. Stay well.
You're so adorable. I love your humility and realness and honesty. God loves you and may He bless you! 🙏❤️🌹🙏👍🤗😘
Youre such a lovely person, the fact that you care is enough, fly on sweet angel-jimi hendrix
I have lost some close people and the older I get the moreso---Robin Williams demise hit me hardest of a person I didnt know, because of his seemingly loving and tender personality towards everyone
This lady who is in the video is cute. 2024, USA
When people die, the only way to keep their influence alive is to remember the wonderful things they provided for us all and to see what they aspired to, if judged as righteous.. it would be great if we could also help out making it easier for others who pursue similar things.
We all die in this world, might as well make it a better place.
As a genX in the so-called truther community, I have heard of men and women who have passed in the same fashion, which is unbelievable to me, is seemed like they had it all as they were maybe too smart for their own good, idk.
By the way, something I'm seeing in the comments are things like "you don't know what people are going through" which, is true in a general sense and there are parts of it that apply to this particular instance as well; but like, i think the most harrowing part of it all is the fact that in her case, i feel like you can actually see that she was going through so much, she said several times that she felt so alone, that she struggled with parasociality, that she had no friends, no family, etc, you can see her bids for connection and support and her attempts at achieving independence, her divorce post, her posts about intrusive thoughts.
RIP.
You're the kind of person who makes us realise that good people still exist on earth( who are pretty too) 😊😊
Your videos are a work of art.
That's shitty... RIP Catherine Ann. No one really knows what's going on in someone's head when something like this happens. She may have seemed happy and outgoing, but that's just the face she puts on for the world. She wants to keep her suffering to herself, because she doesn't want to be a burden on anyone. I've thought about ending it all myself for several years, and even had a plan. Never told anyone anything about it. I would've just ended up dead somewhere. I've thought about it more recently after being diagnosed with HIV. They told me I had 6 years to live, so I thought that I would have to end it to save my wife from the suffering and financial hardship it would bring. Then I became undetectable and was like "FUCK ENDING IT, I'VE GOT 30+ YEARS LEFT IN ME!". Now I'd never end it unless it helped my wife in some way, so that my sacrifice was worth it.
I may be guessing here but she may not have been able to handle where the divorce left her so vulnerable after being so happy, she committed suicide .You don't have this curve at all, I hope you just keep on an upward trajectory towards being free from your phobias and anxieties, and I hope somewhere in that trajectory you meet a suitable man and you guys have an enduring and long happy marriage.
Wasn't familiar with her but I have had the YT experience. Watched a fix-it video for my Mazda truck and went to drop a comment but the guy had died two years previous 😐 Really stuck with me. Keep your chin up, life goes.
it hurt when anthony bourdain left us he was such a real guy no bs
I'm sorry for your loss.
Hey i like watch people talk on youtube and definitely agree it makes me feel like i know them
You’re cute and your honesty really shines through, that quality alone would make many men happy to be with you 😊me included. That’s attractive to me , you’re not someone who pretends to be someone else , you know you have flaws like we all do but you’re open to them, you don’t hide it , I find that really attractive, you’re not stupid , I would date you in a heartbeat 💗 many would. I think you’re beautiful 😊
Sorry about the loss of your friend .She was your friend even though you never met!
May God rest her soul in peace
A similar thing is happening now. There's this UA-camr named Mister Metokur who was diagnosed a couple years ago with a slew of different terminal illnesses, including cancer. He has deteriorated greatly & it's a miracle that he has lasted as long as he has since his diagnoses. It is likely that he'll pass sooner rather than later.
Metokur, or Jim as he is also known; is known for his comedic UA-cam analysis videos, usually about crazy people online or a cultural topic.
Sadly, he has had to remove his videos from his channel, as they are not politically correct, so modern UA-cam wouldn't like them. He also has a great deal of haters too, who would love to see his channel taken down; where, although he doesn't post videos anymore, he still does do occasional livestreams.
It will be a sad day indeed when he does inevitably leave this world.
Sorry for your loss.🙏🏼
And on a random note, please don't follow Katherine's path with this California boyfriend. If you find yourself alone in a new city and estranged from your family for someone's half-baked affection it would be the same situation. I know you're strong, but none of us even want to see the possibility of another tragedy like that.
You are an amazing person! In all seriousness, I think we were made for each other. I've never met anyone like you. So honest, kind, compassionate, contemplative, intelligent, empathetic, and beautiful 😍. I'm so sorry for your pain, I wish I could take you into my arms and hold you close, keeping the wolves ay bay. Hope this message makes you smile. If more women were as genuine as you, maybe I wouldn't feel so alone. Shine on you crazy diamond... shine on!
love and in heaven now!!! in peace .
One of my favourite UA-camrs called Etika world network passed away, he unalived himself.. he made a final video too. I didn’t know how to feel
Recently, a very very good firearms UA-camr named Paul Harrell died of pancreatic cancer. His last video was posted after he died, which he recorded in December, called "I'm dead". People knew he had cancer and he was dying, and he did videos as long as he could as he was withering away from it.
Oh I saw that. I actually never heard of him prior to his passing. Very sad😢
@@iexist7408 He had among the very best Firearms related channels. Really great man.
Yes I saw that too!!! I have pancreatic cancer as well and that’s how I found his channel!! He was such a great genuine human being =[.
Loved Paul Harrell. I remember getting the notification of the "I'm Dead" video.
RIP Paul.
Ohhh ,yeah same it’s actually on my recommended rn
Ya it’s crazy how emotionally attached you can get to someone on an IPAD screen. The internet is a lonely place . This one woman I followed for years died . This other woman isn’t doing podcasts anymore and is fading away
Yeah. Its called a parasocial relationship.... i feel sad when i think about DMX
You are wonderfull! I find your sincerity to be very poetic. In fact I also would love to become your friend somewhere. We could talk about poetry, books, or music, and this strange thing called life! You are not alone in the struggle! Hugs from city of Warsaw. Peter
I love when you burp and say "sorry!".
It's a e-love at first sight. :)
Glad I found your channel
tracey twyman hit me hard when she went
I am in a bad state of mind and close to ending my own life. I understand why Katherine did what she did. This rant is very parasocial but I saw her last videos on UA-cam and felt for her. But no one was helping her, and the people around her neglected her for years. She was bright, sweet, happy, and strong, but she was forcing herself to be that way. She was raising two kids nearly alone and managing an entire social media presence on UA-cam and TikTok. The comments on her videos criticised her to the extreme, and that broke her. She also mentioned that her husband would take the only car they had to work in the morning and come back with it in the evening. So she was trapped in the house they owned for five years, only able to take the car to go out and buy groceries. There was also some level of postpartum depression, and other mental health issues she developed after having kids that nobody noticed, her husband seemed to be completely ignorant of her emotional state and left most of how the kids were taken care of to her, and after the divorce she was having money problems, was addicted to social media, where people were basically calling her crazy. Her visit to the mental facility also did not help at all, maybe because of the financial problems or her missing her girls. It is totally understandable why she would end her own life or just die due to health problems, could also be an overdose, because she did mention using drugs before.
Microdosing shrooms helped me overcome my anxiety
Mega dosing it works for me.
May Jesus be with him.
i think you're a beautiful nice person
Sorry to hear of your loss. BTW, are you still planning or thinking about moving.
This hurts me a lot (I will be okay). Is there a way of preventing some of these instances?
Damn that's quite sad
You seem exactly like the female version of me. I feel like I’m watching me, but it’s you. Not trying to be creepy. 😎
Yeah, that happened to my favorite cousin. She was the happy one, she was the one who had it all together. Then she went out in the woods and shot herself, no warning (that we could see).
Stop consuming seed oils
Do Not idolize influencers or actors...
I don't think you can get to know someone entirely through UA-cam posts, it's impossible to not censor yourself, or have secrets. Still it's sad.
My new favorite youtube channel.
Yeah I had a utuber recently as of last year die. His channel started out teaching men the realities of what society falsely expects you to become, kinda like “red pill” stuff. He was very smart and intuitive! I loved this guy! Unfortunately he was living in Ukraine and started reporting what was really happening contradicting what the main stream media was reporting. The Ukraine government objected to his reporting and imprisoned him in, he died in the prison supposedly from pneumonia. I really looked up to him, he had life figured out! To deal with the loss, I go back a rewatch his videos and keep his philosophy close.
God Bless Gonzalo 🙏
It's very relatable!
Just a reminder, you are beautiful. Never forget that.
Sorry to hear that
Hello IE, I will include your friend Katherine in my prayers. Be comforted that you will see her again in time.
Grant from the King of Random UA-cam channel died a few years ago, that was hard, he left behind a wife and kids. I remember watching him from his early days, one of his videos was even just camping with his kids. They had 10 million subscribers when he died. Unfortunately after his death the UA-cam channel has really changed and is now a former shell of what it was with Grant running things.
you look good dont let anybody tell you different
You thought you had it bad, but those people we sometimes look up to have it far far worse. Try and set A better example by not ever giving it to whatever life throws at you no matter the loss.
I don't like the idea of comparison, but it is true that you never truly know what someone is going through, so it's worth spreading as much kindness as you can while also remembering to be kind to yourself.
She is in a way better place up In heaven just keep that in mind when you think of her, Ok!
I feel really sad for her kids 😢😢
This channel named Dr. Dan got cancer a few years ago, luckily his brother was able to post on his channel and tell people what happened. He even posted his memorial service, but most of the time nobody knows when people online pass away.
You're really pretty! 🥰