The Influencers Glamorizing Autism
Вставка
- Опубліковано 20 кві 2024
- Everyone who enters my giveaway will win a free Bellesa toy or a MASSIVE discount for 🌶️ toys: www.bboutique.co/vibe/imautis...
🐌 Become a snail! If you'd like, you can support the creation of these videos on Patreon! You can get 2 exclusive videos a month, access to the Discord server, podcast episodes, and more! 🐌:
/ imautisticnowwhat
📸 Instagram 📸 : / imautisticnowwhat
💛WATCH NEXT💛:
This Harvard Psychiatrist has some WILD Autism Takes.: • This Harvard Psychiatr...
Autism Moms are making a MOCKERY of Autism.: • Autism Moms are making...
If you think this is Infantilising Autism, you're WRONG.: • If you think this is I...
📹 My Videos mentioned 📹:
Autistic Influencer BULLIED off Social Media: • Autistic Influencer BU...
You're Not Autistic, You're just Privileged.: • You're Not Autistic, Y...
📒 Sources 📒:
Chloe Hayden Tiktok: www.tiktok.com/@chloeshayden?...
HeyitsMaryAlice TikTok: / heyitsmaryalice
www.tiktok.com/@heyitsmaryali...
www.tiktok.com/@heyitsmaryali...
Paige Layle Tiktok: www.tiktok.com/@paigelayle?la...
Glamourise Definition: dictionary.cambridge.org/dict...
www.vocabulary.com/dictionary...
Reasonable Adjustments for Autistic People: www.england.nhs.uk/south/2023...
How long has autism been a spectrum: www.spectrumnews.org/news/evo...
Extreme Male Brain: www.cambridgeindependent.co.u...
Pretty Privilege: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_pr...
Ellie Middleton Instagram: elliemidds...
Paige Layle Reddit Thread: / tiktoker_paige_layle_o...
Disabled People are Stigmatised: business.scope.org.uk/article...
Autism and Eating Disorders: www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-...
Christine McGuinness Unmasking my autism: www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/articl...
Finding out you're autistic after having a child: www.itv.com/news/2024-04-18/s...
Christine McGuinness and her Autism Journey: • Christine McGuinness O...
What is Dopamine Dressing: www.thewardrobeconsultant.com...
Dopamine Dressing Reel: / c5wtdc_mmpa
Glamourising Autism is apparently problematic and creating a false narrative: www.kidspot.com.au/news/holly...
What is Autism: www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-...
NHS Autism Wait Times are Terrible: www.rcpsych.ac.uk/news-and-fe...
Autism and Mental Health: www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-...
Early Autism Research Focused on Boys: www.keranews.org/health-welln...
Beautiful is Good Effect: clarkrelationshiplab.yale.edu...
Bright Hair and Autism!: www.tiktok.com/@catastrophicl...
Chloe Hayden and Insulting Comments: www.tiktok.com/@chloeshayden/...
The general public has low knowledge on autism: www.sciencedirect.com/science...
Autistic People are Judged by Neurotypicals quickly: pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28145...
DISCLAIMER: I am a second-year psychology student and a late-diagnosed #actuallyautistic individual. I am not a qualified healthcare professional.
Everyone who enters my giveaway will win a free Bellesa toy or a MASSIVE discount for 🌶 toys: www.shopbboutique.co/vibe/imautisticnowwhat-yt
I feel like there’s a lot more I could say on this topic, but I’m excited to know what you think!
If you missed the one reacting to the Harvard Psychiatrist who thinks obesity is the cause of autism: ua-cam.com/video/pR9bC9bHWRc/v-deo.html
Or if you want to look at some funny autism memes with me!: ua-cam.com/video/okCnoFC5WS4/v-deo.html
Anyway, back to listening to Tortured Poets now 😂😭💛
I did not expect that sponsorship on this channel
I feel the same way about the Barbie Doll Tarot card readers...
For real that album is lovely but it’s long 😭 I feel so bad for Taylor like she’s working so hard
good job
@@tr-st_me_bro I did not expect a raccoon 🦝 to be using google/ a.i. 🤖 social media.
"the oldest autistic person i worked with was seven and therefore i know exactly how every single autistic adult looks like" is such a weird take
Yeah well she's an ABA therapist. I wouldn't take anything she says with a grain of salt, I'd take it with a whole salt shaker. For those who have trouble with idioms, that means that she does not need to be taken seriously because what she is saying is not accurate.
She says "of course she doesn't know how an adult autistic person behaves" in the same breath as well, yeah she doesn't.
And she know so LITTLE about autism as an “autism professional” that she ignores the obvious fact that they work children whose autistic traits are recognized earlier. She COMPLETLY IGNORES the fact that a enormous percentage of autistic people internelize, suppress, and mask their struggles and challenges as autistic children be.g. or they are super quiet and introverted, isolate so they sometimes they aren’t diagnosed until their teens or adulthood. This “autism specialist” thinks “all austic kids” pass through her ABA training ignoring that autistic children can have a wide spectrum of autistic traits and behaviors. She is ignoring the fact that she has never even encountered autistic children with a different autistic profile than the narrow specific group she has worked with.
It’s as if non-autistics psychologically need to express their superior status as Entitled Judges” on if we are autistic. And, if we do Autism Advocacy then we’re “Fake Autistics and grifters”.
Brrr.
Does she work with the children's parents? If she does then she likely knows adults with autism
EXACTLY. Someone whose job is to torture autistic children into being “normal” has thoughts on what “real” autism is.
I did not choose to be glamorous. Glamour chose me.
It definitely did!!! 🔥😂💛
Dang!🎉👏
exactly
relatable.
A good response to someone who says you don't look autistic, "oh. Well, that's funny, because you do." 😂
Imagine telling Stevie Wonder that he's "glorifying" blindness because he wears different styles of super cool sunglasses all the time. How unbelievably stupid that would be... yet here people are telling Chloe she can't accessorize with an object she was gonna have to wear anyway... to a place where she will have her picture taken over and over and over.. i swear... *people.* i mean seriously: wtf...
THIS! This exactly!
Fr
Being attractive looking while also misunderstanding people's intentions can also make you very vulnerable to manipulation and abuse.
Good point! Also people have so many preconceived notions about attractive people, and, when those notions aren't met, it's almost as if you are seen as even *more* "strange" than an "average" looking person with autism or whatever they picture someone with autism should be. I am conventionally attractive to my culture's standards and people think I am aloof and stone faced (which is fair imo). People who get to know me often say they thought I didn't like them. Would my general lack of emotional displays be so obvious if they didn't want my attention? Would they not label me as arrogant or stuck up if that wasn't a stereotype of good looking people?
I recently watch this video about "autism and pretty privilege" by Of Herbs and Altars and it really rocked me to think about it from that perspective. Even though I grew up bullied for being pale with acne, I was also the only femme person in cis male dominated spaces (mostly gaming) so comparatively I still had "pretty privilege," but all the problems with making friends and understanding people's motives and intentions that many other autistic people have. I really recommend it ua-cam.com/video/qOIrQ1m8p7o/v-deo.html
"You don't look autistic" = "you're challenging my assumptions and I feel weird therefore it's your fault."
The unrecognized cognitive dissonance is strong in some people. 🙄
Yes. This. Although I actually find being autistic means that I usually only talk about topics I know a LOT about and so if you have some knee jerk opinion on the topic based on a headline or two you read, I will happily correct you for an hour because I want to share all my knowledge. Which makes them feel attacked because now I've technically decimated their original position. And now I'm the a-hole. So that's more how I experience this. I actually don't get anyone coming right and saying I don't look autistic... Which I guess means I do.
Ypu don't look like a nice person
And this goes for every stereotype, ppl literally do the same thing with racism. My point is it's terrible and hopefully one day it happens less.
@@jclyntoledo including the lgbtq
being autistic is hard but it isn't all doom and gloom. it's not glamorizing autism to express your joy
YESS! SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE FOLKS IN THE BACK
exactly, this world sucks ass, find and create joy where you can.
Like alot of things, its rooted in abelism. Since most saying this arent autistic, they cant possibly imagine finding joy in what they see as a condition or disorder. This goes for alot of differences/disabilities. Same reason why people say to those with amputations or prosthetics things like "im so sorry for you" when ita not needed or "youre so strong i wouldnt be able to go on if i was like you" they want these conditions gone because in a world made for them, its an outlier. This self loathing and pain can be present in nd people too, obviously in a world not made for us to be apart of it, its hard to be autistic sometimes. But thats different to feeling as if theres no joy for you yknow. I hope i was able to explain well
that's why I hate the "talking about mental illness in a not horrible way means you're glamorising!" rhetoric on social media is bullshit. Like you know a disorder can make you suffer but also have an upside to laugh about? Like I have DID and it's horrible in so many ways, wouldn't wish it on anyone BUT I'll definitely laugh about how one of my alters is super sarcastic and likes acting as if me and her have beef and making sarcastic snarky comments because it's her sense of humor or how another alter and my boyfriend get along so well and he hsas a GREAT time with her or whatnot. Doesn't negate the trauma, the suffering, confusion, anger, blahblah. 🤷🏼♀️ same for everything tbh.
ESPECIALLY AUTISM THAT'S NOT A MENTAL ILLNESS AND YOU CAN HAVE A GREAT LIFE AND BE AUTISTIC AND BE SO HAPPY AHHHH
We are allowed to be happy, too; joyful, even. And we don’t have to fit their narrow definition of autistic to be real.
That's like saying "How dare you show your child with cancer playing with their toys and laughing! You are trivializing the disease!" No one ever says that. It's because it's mental vs. physical. People, for some reason, still struggle to take mental stuff seriously.
Thanks for this
@@daisysummer514 I think that it is because science knows so little about the brain so people fall back on old ideas that anything mental is made up.
Definitely big stigma with mental disabilities and illness.
But I think there's some other elements too:
Visible vs invisible. I have both mental and physical disabilities, but the physical is all invisible and poorly understood so similar issues about being dismissed.
Cancer is its own category I think, and I can't unpack it all here but here's a couple of points. Cancer is well understood and well funded. It is a potentially - hopefully- curable disease. People can have a "war or cancer" and looking for a cure is not problematic. Cancer support groups, sympathy for sufferers, people aren't scared of "catching cancer" from someone, etc. It's also the go-to terrible thing to randomly happen to someone
though if it was an adult with cancer showing just their happy moments maybe their diagnosis would be doubted too lol. you'd be surprised how much people also question physical disabilities
Like the brain isn't a part of the body, and that it doesn't control *everything* we will experience in our lives.
"Nobody owes you their darkest moments"seriously resonated with me
that is why so many want to be "plural"
"They only share the good parts of autism"
... Like, has that person never been on social media before?
I'm not sure what autistic creators they're seeing if they think they're only showing the good parts. I'm afraid to go into the autism community on TikTok, but the UA-camrs I follow share the challenges, but they also share some positive stuff too. I think that's important because autism or any other disability doesn't mean that your life has to just be one big marathon of suck your whole life. Personally I already know about the suck, so it's nice to see an autistic being happy.
respectfully have you? what level 3 tiktokers do you know that go viral every time for posting?
Yeah, and when you share the bad parts you're whining and EvRyBoDy DoEs ThAt 🤪
@@Brainjoy01 well, there are a lot of accounts made by Level 3's Parents that often exploit them, and that's an issue by itself...
As for those that go viral - well, they don't exactly control that 🤔
@@b666rchd5you can dance around it as much as you want but it doesn’t change the fact that autism is misrepresented and misunderstood thanks to TikTok and people only wanting to see the quirky cute parts of autism
"they're glamorising autism" ...They're just putting makeup on. like? huh?
they are making themselves glamorous
Ikr so autistic people can't use makeup? I even put a tiny bit of blush on my nonverbal autistic therapy client. She loved it.
Reminds me of when Candace Owens complained that wheelchair bound person was in an ad for underwear.
@@tatiana4050 HUH?? god forbid wheelchair users need undies 💀
@@humanintelegence4695 I'm sure she is kind of person who would see any type of disabled person (autistic/amputee/down syndrome) putting on make up, and fancy clothes and posting on social media, and say they are glamourising their condition.
take a drink for every time someone compares an autistic adult to an autistic child as a "gotcha"
That will cause death
i'd rather not die, thanks
Im a 32 year old autistic man. Ive dated three autistic women. They were complete polar opposites.
One was extroverted and outgoing, not very sensitive to sensory overload (hyposensitive) and had special interests revolving around socialising.
The other was very introverted and socially isolated, and hypersensitive to sensory overload.
Both were fantastic women and the best relationships ive ever had.
Now im dating another extroverted autistic and ADHD woman.
Ive always felt happiest with neurodivergent women.
There is no one single expression of autism.
What's wrong with making ear defenders cute? "Hey that person who decorates their wheelchair in cool rainbow colours shouldn't do that because some people need wheelchairs." LOL
Yeah, let US have our little Moments of happyness
@@arianewinter4266 For real. Just because *I* don't look cute in something doesn't mean no one can look cute in it. Another point is that if people 'making it cute' cause there to be more cute options for everyone else, where's the downside? It's like people complaining about gluten free being 'trendy' - who cares! It means more GF options for those who need it! Back in the 90s all there was was cardboard bread that turned into masonite when you toasted it. OK, I'll stop now lol.
I'm both autistic and a wheelchair user, and unfortunately people do get annoyed or even accuse wheelchair/mobility aid users of faking if we decorate them :/
but I agree that we should be able to decorate autism aids like ear defenders too! really any kind of disability aid we should be able to decorate or make cute or fun to be honest
Nothing, but according to ableists, we're not allowed pretty disability aids, they have to be plain and ugly because we shouldn't want nice things.
Hearing-aids can be whatever colours we want FFS. Why do they have to a boring beige?? Let me spark a bit of dopamine despite hating having to wear the thing day in day out.
id rather see someone "glamorizing" autism than someone recording someone else have a meltdown
Allistics capitalizing on autism being more acceptable than autistics "glamorizing" it totally make sense, but only in our absolutely screwed up timeline
without their conent you mean. it's wrong to suggest people don't show their high support adult children's darknest momments. because , saying such words is saying "some people need to be hidden". trust me on it. someone told me that is wrong. like autismwarriormama. we can't say mean things about those videos. suggesting her son not be on social media.
@kaiyodei of course without concent we are tired of seeing abusive videos being posted to punish the child or talking about them like they are animals. These people should not be hidden but without care and concent, it just puts them in danger
@@kaiyodeiWould you post your child's revenge porn online? No? Then don't post them in a mental health crisis.
@@kaiyodeiYou know, this has the same exact premise as revenge pr0n, but you don't see "autism moms" doing that... Because its illegal. You know, Posting someone's private and intimate moments online to punish them.
I’m thirty two, I was diagnosed like five years ago, there is ZERO help in my area for autistic adults unless you live in a home with people who need more services than I do. So I don’t understand the people saying we’re “taking services from others”. I’m frustrated I can’t get any help at all.
This is common.
After I got my apartment the property manager said I can’t be autistic because I’m not like her 8 yo nephew… and that she didn’t think I was as disabled as her because she has fibromyalgia. I have nerve damage that makes me unable to sit down.
Some people are just absolute idiots.
I think people assume autistic people need to suffer to truly be autistic
Yeah, we can be happy if they'd only let us, lol. I feel like I'm in one of those Victorian boarding schools with them.
24/7 suffering, apparently. My childhood was agonizing, but now that I've learned effective coping mechanisms and am in an environment where I feel relaxed and safe, I've either "outgrown" my autism or am misdiagnosing a rough childhood. 🙄
Yep. I can't help but think of the whole Bury Your Gays trope and the way society can only accept a so-called misfit if they suffer. It's still somehow connected to the idea of moral purity to not not be disabled or "devient" in any way. There are some really fucking deep wounds there and most people aren't even aware.
To the point where we internalise it. That's where the horror really starts - when not suffering triggers guilt and self doubt.
Most are, but they want and mean miserable all the fucking time with No ways to cope, No Moment of being at ease No happyness ever . . . Like wtf?!
I hate the "what about me" people on the Internet.
"Oh, your Autism makes you seem quirky, but that's not _my_ experience, so stop sharing _your_ experience." 🙄
Yeah, like "what about me?" Is a personal question they gotta find their own answer for in life.
Those "what about me" people should start sharing their experience then!!
"I'm miserable so everyone else has to be too."
to be fair people now think autism is a joke because of them so thats why... i have to let doctors know i was diagnosed before tiktok. that should give you context
@Brainjoy01 but that's not those people's fault, that's abelism talking. Sometimes they can be a bit more positive then negative, and if your really struggling that can feel annoying. But I think what they are doing is really good, I'd rather accept the fact I'm Autistic than hate myself for something I can't be ride of.
hey! its heyitsmaryalice, thank you for saying all of this!! The invalidation never ever stops. I appreciate you talking about this. There are SO MANY ways to be autistic and they are all valid.
I just wanted to say thank you for representing for us girlies who have autism and aren’t believed because we don’t act like others with autism ✨ Also, you’re literally so gorgeous it takes my breath away just wanted to let ya know 🥰
As someone with severe internalized ableism (cerebral palsy), seeing positivity from the disabled community is honestly amazing for my mental health. Whenever I feel down, I can find people like me with uplifting stories. Seeing people making light fun of their struggles makes me feel less alone
Thinking advocating for autism awareness is glamorization is a huge indication of this persons ableist beliefs.
are you referring to the person making the video or someone else? because she literally states she doesnt think that is glamorizing even before the 3 minute mark
@@kris_underrune the commentor dude with autistic friends
^THIS^ people need to be aware ableism is hurtful!
@@0verpricedcoffee553 ah okay thank you
@@mysmirandam.6618 internalized ableism as well? Because I'm currently dealing with extreme levels of it.
It's quite telling when the amount of people telling autistic influencers: "You're doing bad awareness for people who actually have autism" AREN'T EVEN AUTISTIC THEMSELVES!
Yes you have to love the white knighters that believe that they know what is best for all different minorities and speak over people from that minority to do so.
Yes! It's highly likely that I'm autistic (as in, psychologist said I have symptoms and I spent hours of research into the topic because that's what I do) and meet what I've seen of the diagnostic criteria. Will I speak for the community? No. Will I educate others on what I know the autistic community prefers to help fight misinformation? Yes, but will note that I am not diagnosed autistic myself. Like if even I'm careful to not speak on behalf of the autistic community, these people shouldn't be speaking on behalf of the community at all.
Actually some of us with cr!ticisms of the ‘community’ actually fit all of your criteria for autism. Now what?
That's the typical double standard we've always been faced with: everyone seems to be allowed an opinion on autism except autistic people themselves.
@@kittendoesstuff492 I'm undiagnosed too, but Autism makes the most sense. I've been continuing to watch videos to inform myself, but I'm not an expect. I do wonder about some of my coworkers being on the spectrum, but I don't know for sure if they are.
Honestly, when you talked about Chloe Hayden wearing ear muffs/ear defenders at the event, I immediately thought “what if she did a sponsored deal with someone like Bose or, beats?!” She could totally rock some sponsored ear protection!! Make some money while also using an Autistic tool!!
People say that fat people, trans/nonbinary people, chronically ill people, and ND people are "glamorizing" or "just want oppression points", but really, i think they just hate seeing marginalized people being happy. It doesn't match their perception that marginalization means suffering 24/7.
Holy, cow, "Nobody owes you their darkest moments" is a quote for the ages.
Holy cow😮
Welcome to "Are the Neurotypicals alright?" episode 254.
😂 Yes, basically!
Sadly there are plenty of autistic guys who get like this too. They feel they have "real" autism and attack as a faker anyone they think is suffering enough. Mostly women because that group has a lot of crossover with incels.
Should be a sub like are the cis OK?
Are you a comedian? Because I would absolutely love to go to your shows! 😂
No they aren’t okay, but they never really are.
A large part of this I think comes down to “how can people be broken and happy when I’m normal and miserable. Those people should feel worse than me.”
I zoned out for a second and then came back during the sponsor and was like "is that what I think it is?" before rewinding and finding out that it was in fact what I think it is
The whole "they only show the good parts" always confuses me because like of course I'm not gonna film a meltdown and post it online. And if someone else filmed me having a meltdown I sure as heck wouldn't want THEM to post it.
If someone chooses to post their own meltdowns to show what it's like, that's their prerogative, but no one should be expected to do that.
Because I am an etymology nerd, I can't resist pointing out that older definitions of _glamour_ don't refer to looking elegant or appealing. It literally means a mask or disguise! And masking is always a hot topic in the autism world. So _masking_ could be referred to as "adopting a glamour" of being more normal, convivial, casual, etc.
Ha! Excellent point. So perhaps many of us specialize in glamorizing autism then.
Or would it be "we need to stop glamorizing as neurotypical"? Either way this is cool to learn.
This reminds me of the Lunar Chronicles (Book series) where *glamour* was used to describe an illusion-type magic
@@c4tac133 Intriguing, who wrote this~?
this is super cool, thanks for sharing voltijuice
It feels like if someone afab talks about their autism, sometimes people don’t believe it because autism often means needing more support. And girls aren’t supposed to need support. They’re supposed to handle everything, because they’re “more mature” and “independent”- unless someone wants to control them.
"you can't be autistic because you don't need support. also how dare you need support and make any demands of me instead of making yourself as small and invisible as possible"
These comments are so real
Had not connected those dots before but it makes a lot of sense actually; it fits very well into the whole separation that was created for "female autism" because girls supposedly mask "instinctually", when in reality it has to do with the different expectations and limitations that society puts into girls growing up in comparison with boys. It is becoming blatantly obvious that people nowadays 9/10 go after afab creators for not fitting the autistic canon they have in their heads and I have yet to see the same level of energy directed at amab creators sharing their experiences (not that they do not experience ableism as well, obviously, just not this level of witch hunting for being "fakers'' and "bad representation" or whatever).
AFABs are often misdiagnosed or late diagnosed because of this mindset, it's like a feedback loop unfortunately
I mean in recent years it flipped and I think that is due to more men being recruited from the alt right, which is fustrating.
Honestly even though I am autistic and have experienced severe bullying for it I am kind of glad to see awareness for how extreme bullying is towards us. It just angers me so much because people will quickly defend themselves and say that it isn't possible for them to be influenced by extreme behavior yet here they are talking about how we're autistic and therefore subhuman.
Do they forget that our interest could be make up and fashion ?
I'm and artsy one , my face is like another canvas for me to paint !!
People who get angry at somebody making their adaptive equipment look cute betray their real complaint: They think that disabled people exist to suffer, and are angry that some disabled people are able to find joy.
legit.
True. Another commentor compared it to decorating a wheel chair. I challenge these people to go up to someone in a wheelchair and say that their decorations are unacceptable. Edit: clarification
I'm not sure its that. I think its more an efficiency/utility thing. Its normal in protestant cultures to see utility as moral and ornament as immoral so the combination of ornament and utility is perverse to them.
Its a recent thing, walking sticks used to be decorated with a variety of handle styles and be beautiful varnished wood but now they're all these identical plastic and metal things so you're not even allowed to be old and dignified anymore.
Its a weird "well if you're treating it frivilously you don't need it and don't deserve respect" thing rooted in insecurity. Probably arising from how modern society doesn't respect anyone, able bodied people just get the illusion of having dignity to lose.
The other element is cute = childlike and to modern people children = a burden so its easy to resent cute things and think people trying to be cute are demanding something from you rather than self-motivated but that's probably closer to your point after the comma.
@@AC-dk4fp i wonder why it changed👀
@AC-dk4fp you've SO hit the nail on the head... I was in the Lake District recently and outside a cute 2nd hand shop seen a stand with so many beautiful ornate walking sticks all hand carved lovingly out of polished wood. Why is everything nowadays grey and generic?!
You're like the internet's anti-bully. I really admire how respectful and logical you handle people that don't share your opinion.
Boosting this comment
I haven’t had the same experience from her followers. They’re still dog piling me for a comment I made and stop replying to a month ago. 😂
agreed, she is so kind and handles situations very good!
@@bluecannibaleyessus
@@bluecannibaleyes And I wonder what that comment must have been..? 🤔
I've always felt that my special interests and hyperfocus gives me easy access to a type of happiness that seems to be rare and fleeting for NTs. That upsets a certain type of people.
I think this comment just shifted my outlook on life for the better. I've never seen someone call out that "type of happiness" but I know exactly what you're talking about (the hand-flappy kind) and I've neglected it for years in a search for happiness towards what I'm "supposed" to be happy about.
There's a tendency for us to talk about how we struggle to feel feelings and recognize what our body is doing, but I know I'm very familiar with this one. I wonder if really we just experience very different feelings than NTs and keep trying to look for experiences that NTs have where we won't find them?
@@colbyboucher6391 I think you're right; far too many of us abandon our happiness to be "normal," especially when we're young.
When neurotypicals talk about true happiness, that sounds like what I would describe as being content. My happiness seems childlike in comparison, and it looks like neurotypicals lose the ability to feel that way as they grow up.
And thank you! Reading your post put a smile on my face. I'm glad my words resonated with you.
we had an assembly about autism awarness and info today and evyones was saying they were trying to 'normalize autism' and they 'shouldnt have a whole assembly' UM wtf??
thanks for your vids they taught me a lot
Good point, Meg. Autism is not a competition where we try to "outautistic" each other.
Speak for yourself, I for one have won two gold medals in Autisming in the Olympic Games
(joke)
It is a competition. I actually won regionals last week by doing 2 more autisms than the rest of competitors. Wild.
😂 Also, in my experience "we" aren't trying to out-autistic each other. The NTs are trying to get us to race...maybe they want to place bets or some such?
So, there's casual autism and ranked competitive autism? This opens up new opportunities for us autistics like scholarships and national leagues! 😀 👍
@@quinn0517I don't know, it seems like that sometimes though..!
I think they are projecting. They are shocked they could be ATTRACTED to an AUTISTIC PERSON and cognitive dissonance takes over, they reject the idea that pretty young women can have extreme struggles they have never seen and do not understand the reality of. Thank you for talking about this!
but wait, the whole stereotypical high school structure says that autistic people should fall into the “undesirable nerds, geeks, and freaks” categories. I can’t comprehend that someone with autism could be sorted into the “cool kids caste”. I find this unconscionable. I mean, autism is such a blight on other people’s lives that we need to actively push it out so we don’t have to deal with it (at least that’s what the popular kids say). So clearly something must be wrong here since I’m attracted to that which we should be pushing away. I mean, obviously I should inherently have the “appropriate response” towards autism, therefore *_I_* can’t be what’s wrong about this situation. I’m not immediately aggressively repulsed by it, so they must be faking. My “autism-realness radar” sends me into fits of exclusionary violence. So you’re wrong, not me, you.
"Ooooh but ewwwww. You're pretty but such a kid. Stop that."
On the plus side we know they're not a, uh.... ~ahem~ pedalo? XD (Yes I know it's incorrect, quoting Inside No9, but it gets around the robot.)
Thank you ❤
So much kindness LOL love u guys
I've seen the term "Aspie Tradwife" coming up lately. 🤔
god forbid autistic people find some brevity in our situation. why does everything have to be negative and bad?
You really hit the nail on the head with this video. I'm a part of the Autism subreddit and regularly see posts like "Can we stop acting like level ones have it bad?" and talking about how level ones can't complain. They also complain heavily about the parents of children with autism and completely negate the struggles of being one. They lambasted a poor woman for having the gall to open up about her experience and how she is struggling to create a world for her son. They called her an abuser and said CPS needed to be called on her. All for saying her child's condition was really hard to handle. The subreddit is filled with people looking for an echo chamber and I regularly step in to remind them that it is a spectrum and they can't sit and bleat it if they don't mean it.
Me and my younger sister are both autistic but my sister fits the stereotype of the "5 year old nonverbal autistic nephew" so I went most of my life undiagnosed and was told that I "just didn't listen" 😭😭
Same I had my autistic brother so the comparison was right there :( he was 2 years younger and I just got ignored unless i overachieved or took care of my 3 younger siblings a lot..... im an RBT as well the difference is I just recently went through aba therapy training. It's changing theres new research popping up and different more effective ways redirecting maladaptive behaviors
aaah same !! My sister was diagnosed at 3 years old and Im only getting my traits recognised by my mum now ahah
Same but with an older brother. It was very obvious when he was a kid so he got diagnosed young, then my other brother with ADHD and i, as the youngest, was mostly left to be the ‘normal’ one because my parents were too busy dealing with my older brothers. I was only diagnosed at 17, which is young in comparison to some, but a little shocking considering my parents had looked after another autistic child for longer than me. I just hid it better because i was expected to be normal, but its likely that my parents are ADHD and on the spectrum respectively so they’ve struggled with their own issues too. Funny how it all works out
Same with me and my older brother! Neither of us got diagnosed back then but he got all the attention because he had behavioral problems, was aggressive towards class mates, combative with teachers, extremely rude and stubborn etc. I was pretty much the polar opposite - extremely compliant, people-pleasing, overachieving, so everybody was like "she's fine, she doesn't need anything". Ironically, my brother ended up with much better mental health in the long run because he never gave a poop what anyone else thought of him and he just followed his interests; when I got diagnosed at 34 I barely knew who I was and had to start building self esteem from nothing.
My younger sister might have autism, and in general needs much more assistance and has meltdowns often. As a result, I’m undiagnosed and will probably stay that way until I’m an adult.
you know, as an autistic person who has a bit more support needs than many others, i hate when people pit autistic people against each other. i have lots of struggles when it comes to my autism and need help with lots of things, yet i don't mind people being happy with their autism (i have autism pride myself, even)
Your name is a wild ride. I love your response, though
I wish everyone would be like you in this regard.
@@franki1990 and the pfp! Beautiful 😭
"how dare you be conventionally pretty and also disabled," basically.
the glamorizing --> feminising autism thought line was SUCH A GOOD POINT!! have not thought about that before but love that take
I really wish autisms weren't in such short supply. I have waited forever to get an autism. The gatekeepers should just simply manufacture more so that we have a backup autism in case the first one gets shut down or confiscated or something. When I'm issued an autism, I'm totally getting insurance for it in case it is stolen.
Pandemic shortages, amiright? 🙃
@@misspatvandriverlady7555 Good thinking. That's probably it.
I blame the Evergiven jamming up the Suez. I've been waiting for my autism to arrive for *ages*!
@@Hexane88yes, I want to exchange my ableism for an autism so my ticktock get more likes, said no one ever. 😅
Pfizer needs to step up their game 😤 /s
Autistic Person: Has one positive interaction and am happy.
Random Commentator: You are glamorizing your autism.
Autistic Person: I am just showing that I am happy despite my struggles of autism.
Random Commentator: But you are acting like autism is a cute thing because I know an autistic person thats no doing well. You are glamorizing stuff.
Autistic Person: That doesn't even make sense autism is a disability you are acting like I am recruiting people for autism but I just want to share positive stuff.
Random Commentator: But I don't like that.
Literally what these commentors are saying. They are getting mad at neurodivergent people wanting to live a happy life and sharing happyness.
This is perfect
It literally feels like they're just trying to drag others down. It's like they're saying I suffer from it so you should suffer with it too, you can't find any good in the bad.
What's even worse is the amount of people in my town alone, let alone the entire world, think that ND people and mentally ill alike should be limited in what they should spend financially. To them, they shouldn't be buying pop, fast food, vanity items, or anything that isn't just plain foods and water. No smoking weed (even if that's your genuine medication recommended to you), no alcohol, just a boring miserable life. That mindset has always irked me to no end. If I don't walk away from someone that talks like that, I will curse them out anymore.
Don't argue with these people, just reply with, "cope, seethe, mald."
Rp: ypu shpuld be wearing a helmet and drooling like my cousins, friends, doctors son
As a Registered Behavioral Technician myself, I can 100% say we DO NOT have the power to diagnose autism or not. That would be a BCBA or a Doctor/psychologist. That person definitely should get fired if that’s what they’re doing
Recently I mentioned to a new friend that I might be autistic and am seeking an evaluation, and he said I didn't seem like it and asked if I could dance. I said sorta? I can do dances that I learn and if it's music I like I can dance to it. He said "autistic people can't dance so you're not autistic" absolutely baffled me
When I entered public school in the late 70s, I was...
1. Hyperlexic & doing calculus problems for fun
2. Placed in the EMR classroom / labeled the R-word
3. Given a cruel nickname for my hand-flapping
4. Relentlessly bullied & patently disinterested in socializing with peers
5. Multilingual
6. Phobic of dogs, crowds, being touched & various other random things that terrified me but rarely bothered others
7. Extremely sensitive to smells, sounds & sensory assaults that no one else seemed to notice
8. Called a tomboy, in spite of my hyperfixation on dance & tendency to wear girls' leotards 24/7
9. Synesthetic to the point that the (wrong, to my brain) colors of the alphabet on the classroom walls irked me
10. Perfectionist & desperately afraid of making ANY mistakes, but hopelessly inept in social settings
Just 2 years later, I was placed in the gifted program. In the same school where I'd been labeled low-IQ.
I've never been able to pass for NT, but I've also never been formally recognized as ND, a situation that I strongly suspect is far more common among others of my generation than anyone wants to believe.
I'm glad to see younger people advocating for themselves & having a level of self-awareness that enables them to identify & embrace neurodiversity in all its various manifestations.
I was in a remedial English class of 2 whilst also having the highest maths score out of 250 pupils.
I was exclusively identified as gifted as a kid. I was diagnosed ADHD-PI at 22 and am currently working on an autism diagnosis while sorting out that I’m really quite autistic, but it’s been partially accommodated by my intelligence. I recently remembered my father telling me to stop doing things because I looked “like a spaz”; probably obvious stimming; but I COULDN’T have been identified autistic, or even “Aspie”, because of the lack of a clear speech delay! 🤦♀️
What are your opinions on formal recognition of ND people who are managing to do well in school, academically and socially?
Like, imagine a kid who has learned to mask well and practiced a musical special interest enough to become very popular in school, who also shows clear signs of AuDHD - what advice might you give to their patients?
Back then autistic people were locked up
Im an 80s child. I was considered possessed by my kindy teacher, but my behaviour was always blamed on my mother (despite my older sister being a "very good girl") at best I got a "hyperactive" diagnosis. But often, my rages weren't taken seriously because I was too cute. So I learned to lean into the cute. I figured out how to get away with existing under the surface. It's so wonderful seeing people being exactly themselves now. It just brings me so much hope for the future.
“Omg I can’t believe that these influencers are glamorizing autism and ignoring the ppl who REALLY suffer with autism!!”
*influencer talks about how they struggle with autism*
“BOO HOO! YOU’RE NOTHING LIKE MY NEPHEW’S FRIEND WITH AUTISM!! STOP CLAIMING THE AUTISM LABEL FOR OPPRESSION POINTS!!”
I’ve met Chloe Hayden at an autism walk. She’s sweet and authentic.
As an autistic adult who is studying to become a registered behavior technician. I promise that one lady does not have the experience to decide who is or is not autistic. my dad is a special ed teacher, and both he and my mom do part time rbt work. As an rbt, your main job is to keep your kids with disabilities safe, happy, and healthy in school. Besides the fact that she has never worked with autistic adults (or probably even interacted with them tbh), a registered behavour technician is NOWHERE. NEAR. QUALIFIED. to diagnose anyone with anything. And even if she was a licensed qualified psychologist,she would not be able to diagnose someone through highly edited social media. The gall of this lady, geez.
Because of how much of a struggle being autistic can be, I've dealt with suicidal thoughts and depression most of my life. I've had to fight really hard for the happiness and the positive attitude that I have today. It makes me sad that others would think I'm "glamorizing autism" or faking it just because I experience joy. The joy that I worked so hard for.
I feel you, I'm not yet at the joy stage of it, but I am trying very hard to get there. I don't want to hate myself for something I can't control. Sad people can't see that aspect of it.
Same here. Before I knew I was autistic, I was convinced I was born defective with some unknown mental disorder that caused me to be a burden to everyone around me and cause them severe pain without even being aware of it. I thought for a long time that the only way I could actually provide anything of value and joy to the lives of my loved ones was to take my own life to ease their suffering. The only reason I am still alive today because I finally met other autistic people and they always loved me for who I was, even at my worst moments.
I worked EXTREMELY hard to get where I am today and I deserve to enjoy life.
"the joy that I worked so hard for" that made me tear up, I feel that so hard
This comment made me realise that an underlying belief that a lot of this criticism some coming from is that you’re not allowed to be autistic and happy 😮
I am not sure why exactly, but it does seem like a lot of people are coming from that as their underlying belief or framework
I’m so relieved to see someone experience that as an autistic person. That may sound weird but I’ve felt this exact same way. Why can’t I be autistic and happy?! People see disabled people as constantly suffering… but no, it’s just how our brain works. Yea it can be debilitating but that honestly comes from people who treat us like the ableists shown in the video. I’d suffer less if autism wasn’t looked down upon. It’s ironic, isn’t it, that allistics can’t understand that autism isnt all “black and white”. It literally just is. We wouldn’t be us without it. People think of autism as just a list of problems…. When in reality having an autistic brain has its issues but it isn’t a problem itself.
It's just another classic case of "I don't like when autistic people blend into society and express joy because it makes it harder for me to ostracize and belittle them."
.
My autism has made me miserable for more than half my life. I almost took my own life because I felt like my suffering was inescapable. I would not be here today if I ignored the positives to constantly wallow in the negatives. I deserve to feel happy in my autistic brain. I'm tired of suffering and hating myself. I'm ready to enjoy life and love my autistic self.
I think a lot of us are more bitter that autistic traits are only acceptable when the person that has them is attractive. So seeing attractive people try to normalize these behaviors feels insulting because autistic traits just look “quirky” on attractive people while unattractive people get bullied for having them. God forbid you are autistic and fat, POC, visibly disabled or otherwise don’t fit into conventional beauty standards
I’ve also felt this way most of my life. I’m glad you’re still here though. You deserve to live just as much as the next guy! ❤ Autism is hard but it’s not always bad. We all deserve love and support, I hope you get nothing but joy and prosperity in your future (and present)❤
We’ll get there one day ❤ as for now let’s involve ourselves with the people we know understand :)
They're mad at her for being happy. They're calling her disrespectful for sharing that she's experiencing joy and also she is autistic. I'm sure she experiences those social difficulties, those meltdowns, but why the hell should she have to stew in that misery? She deserves to enjoy her happiness.
During my whole diagnosis process, Chloé’s content and her book made me feel so seen. Yes she talks about the bright and colourful moments of her life and she is an incredibly bright bubbly person but she also doesn’t shy away from experiencing how autism affects her life in a negative way and how she has had so many struggles in her life due to her autism. I felt so seen and respected by both her bubbly ‘quirky’ personality (which I personally have been called as well) and by her personal struggles especially in the area of schooling.
She was expressing utter joy. Why does that bother everyone so much? Be happy for her and move on.
They think autistic people can't experience moments of joy and that we're supposed to be suffering 24/7.
It was for WHALES. HOW OFTEN DO YOU SEE WHALES???? THEY'RE COOL!!!
If you don't work on a boat or oil rig, not very often I assume XD
What I hear whane people say someone is glamourizing any mental illness/condition is : "you're seeking well-being and happiness and thriving and sharing that with other when you're supposed to struggle and hate your life and not achive anything, this is not okay"
and this is disgusting
I wonder whether it would be considered a symptom of a mental illness in itself? What else might provoke someone to be upset about another person's happiness? Do they think autism should always be a visible struggle or just constant difficulty in general?
Maybe they're jealous that other people are capable of accepting themselves?
@@skachor I don't think it would be a symptom of illness to not be accepting. They just can't think people can struggle more than average and still be happy sometimes. They can't see that accomodated disability mean kinda less disabeled, too, or more healthy and happy at least. I also think they can't see disabeled people as whole people, who have a life, emotions, coping mecanisms, things they like and dislike outside of their disabilities, people they like, love and who love them back, desires and aspirations and so on
@loikira5841 I mean more the animosity that comes with it. Although, in some sense I see a connection between understanding/accepting and the emotional reaction. If they truly understood and accepted, they'd be more empathetic, yet in hostility I can't see any reasonable explanation but jealousy.
Yeah, it's pretty messed up when people say that. I think the only time it can be argued that a disability or disorder is being glamorized is when the media portrays something without proper education rather than individuals sharing their stories. Specifically OCD comes to mind for this since it's frequently portrayed as little "quirky" things most people do rather than something that causes great distress without proper management/treatment
And yet when people do struggle it's "everyone struggles just pull yourself back by your bootstraps and get the he11 over it!" Can't win with people that refuse to listen.
1. Some 'health' professionals, like some professionals in other disciplines, can be extremely opinionated and stubborn (inflexible) to the point of being open to new concepts that may run contrary to what they have spent the time and money to be accredited.
2. You're too beautiful to be autistic.
a) Inferring, you're too ugly not to be autistic
b) While beauty is in the eye of the beholder, autism is in the brain of the autistic person
c) the age old belief that correlates physical and mental health with physical 'perfection'. As Johhny Rivers wrote in the song 'Secret Agent Man': A pretty face can hide an evil mind.
Thank you for posting your reaction. ❤
You nailed it with the scarcity mindset- ‘you’re taking (attention, sympathy, “resources”) from my child and there’s not enough to go around, you’re not worthy.’ There’s also a “virtue through suffering” thing in America, I don’t know the roots. But if you’re not suffering sufficiently for everyone’s satisfaction, you should pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop expecting help or sympathy. If I can’t visibly see and measure your suffering, you’re just making excuses.
You mean "martyr culture"?
@@SuperMonaLisaBros not sure exactly what you mean- it’s like an anti-martyr culture. You have to be a Righteous Victim, or you’re not worthy of compassion. Is that what you mean?
@@user-dm6jy5jr9o Yes. The sort of "you must suffer for your cause". A "holier than thou" mindset mixed with a victim complex.
@@SuperMonaLisaBros right- and it seems like the underlying issue is some of these moms feel like THEY are the martyrs (sacrificing all for their disabled child) and these level 1 ASD people are getting sympathy without having to suffer or sacrifice “enough.” I really don’t think it’s about taking away imaginary resources (in the US at least, ASD level 1 gets absolutely no help of any kind as long as you can work), it’s about the threat to their righteous identity.
As someone who was recently diagnosed with autism and adhd I would change a lot of things about my brain like it being extremely hard to make friends, more easily overstimulated and being very forgetful but honestly I feel like in a lot of ways a lot of my autistic traits are good things to have.
Cheers to embracing your wonderfully unique self! 🎉
I feel this I have recently started having negative reactions and side effects to ADHD medication. I’ve been taking which is not the one I was supposed to be on. We haven’t been able to get the one I’m supposed to be on since Covid because of the shortage so for a while now I’ve just been switching medications and the one I’ve been on for the past year or so has these side effects that I have now starting to experience including panic attacks in the middle of the night. About a week ago I was crying because of this and wishing I could “fix” my brain so I would no longer need the medication that was causing this and I just felt absolutely horrible about myself and what I could not do due to my disability. It really sucks.
As someone who was diagnosed with autism a while ago, overstimulation and difficulty making friends are often due to societal norms (and in some cases official policies) that that weren't created with autistic brains and needs in mind. These rules and public opinion don't have to stay this way and seeking out / reaching out to neurodivergent / autistic people who will be able to empathize and respect your needs will probably help in the meantime but I don't know your specific situation.
same. the social struggles are the hardest part for me, but i also like being super passionate about my interests and being unique in my own way
I'm not even 5 minutes in, but that chick who works with autistic kids 7 & under really thought that made her an expert in adult autism? like for real? I hope she lost her job and that wasn't just a rumor
right??? like- expecting autsitic adults to act like the autistic children you see everyday is stupid
I'm an RBT and KNOW a ton of adults on the spectrum and I would NEVER even think of diagnosing anyone besides my self let alone someone i never met in a 3 minute video!!!
@mysmirandam.6618 I’m surprised an allistic RBT would even be interested in content like Meg’s, considering she’s extremely neuropositive and your industry is the equivalent of conversion therapy for Autistics.
She said she's an RBT, so that means she's ABA, unless there's a different kind of RBT that works with autistic kids. I've heard there are some good ABA people out there, but judging only by that rant she went on, I'd be wary of sending any of my family members to her.
-You're an ABA therapist, or is there any other kind of RBT who doesn't do ABA?
I’ve always been scared to wear headphones in public even though it helps me tremendously. Seeing a well known actress wearing them AND making them look cute makes me much less anxious about wearing mine.
This was really well researched and scripted. I really appreciate all the hard work you put into it.
Soo basically what they're saying is "you're happy with yourself = you cant be autistic cus autism=unhappy n endless suffering"
Why are people mad that the creators only show their good side, why do u feel that they're obligated to show u their vulnerable side, maybe they don't want to, they don't feel comfortable sharing their most vulnerable moments on the Internet for anyone to judge and comment on it, whatever their reason might be you cannot hate someone for just sharing whatever they want to share with the world, everyone is obligated to hide what they want to and they shouldn't be judged for it.
This!!! It’s the Autism $peaks mentality. “Being autistic is a tragedy that ruins the lives of the autistic person and everyone around them. Therefore, you cannot possibly be autistic because you have experienced joy/success/beauty/positive relationships/anything else positive.”
I mean, everyone has whatever feelings they have, but criticizing people for being happy does seem like a behavior people might want to examine in themselves! 🤔
That's actually a point I didn't even think of. It never crossed my mind that some of these creators may be uncomfortable sharing a very vulnerable side of them. Or they may feel it could affect their real life, or that it may not be safe to do so. Or even that they are trying to stay positive themselves and that's why they lean more positive. No one's obligated to show a venerable side of them to prove they struggle. Thank you for this comment.
I should probably finish watching before I comment. But goodness, I struggle to understand the whole “your struggles don’t look exactly like my struggles, so you must have it easier and aren’t deserving of a diagnosis.”
This channel has helped me a lot in learning more about Autism and excepting myself after I recently got a diagnosis. Thank you for all your hard work and beautiful videos❤️
This is a really excellent video, thank you for all the work you did to put this together! I am autistic and I definitely dress to please my senses and express myself! I also put work into looking "good" and "put together" because it helps me feel less anxious when socialising... its like my armour, my cocoon. And I always include jewellery that I can stim with.
I’ve never been told “you don’t look autistic,” but I think that’s just because I’m a white boy.
I’ve never been told that either, and I think it’s because I can’t mask. :’)
@@thediscodevil0949 I've never been told that, and I think it's because I can mask!
Nah that's just because they think you don't look 'disabled'. Whatever that means.
Closest I've been was by my uncle, I probably should have said - "that's only because you are too"
That entire side of the family is very neurodivergent (and actually the other side of my family too but the other side of the family is poor so their traits don't hit all of the stereotypical tropes).
Ohhh wait someone did say "But there's nothing wrong with you" and I said "yes".
I love Chloe Hayden so so much. I think her representation in heartbreak high (as well as social media) is amazing and she helps me so so much. She isn’t glamorizing autism, she’s just happy and living openly. People are crazy
Chloe Hayden 🛐🛐🛐
great video! it’s interesting to hear how misogyny plays a part in this discussion. it’s so stupid bc with this wave of autism acceptance has also come a wave of misinformation, which is what people SHOULD be mad about.
"What the eye doesn't see, and the mind doesn't know, doesn't exist." -DH Lawrence
What irritates me is those people who are talking about “glamorizing “ autism are just irritating because they don’t realize that for a long time only people with the “look” or a severe set of symptoms were diagnosed and taken seriously while everyone else was misdiagnosed or brushed aside. The diagnosis comes with multiple categories and with a list of symptoms under each. You don’t have to have them all and they can be at different levels of severity so just sit and try to contemplate the massive unimaginable number of different combinations and step back and realize you know the name of the diagnosis you barely understand it.
Saying "You're glamorizing autism," because people dare to show autistic joy or the positive sides of autism is abelist AF.
I’m so sick of ppl. So many don’t believe me until they’ve witnessed me have some level of an episode. It is exhausting and deeply painful to have to defend myself while actively suffering from my diagnosis. Thank you for shedding light on this conversation ❤
back to dopamine dressing
when I wear anything that relates to my special interests I feel incredible
like I'm wearing the best thing in the world and it doesn't matter if its considered fashionable or not
People with other disabilities get the same crap comments on social media. There is a UA-camr with pinpoint vision (nearly completely blind) AND a completely blind UA-camr that constantly get told they must not be vision impaired because they don’t act blind. They have guide dogs. They talk about their “blind-person moments” (thinking your outfit looks a certain way and realizing it’s completely different from what you meant to put together). I’m sorry, are these people expecting constant footage of them running into walls, completely unadapted or unacclimated to their own homes, or what would it take?
GOD FORBID SOMEONE WITH A DISABILITY ISN’T LIVING IN A CONSTANT STATE OF MISERY.
I LOVE it when disabled content creators glamorize their lives or show joy. It shows other people with disabilities that that is something they can find in their lives, too.
Are you talking about Paul from Paul and Matthew?
@@romyjane17 yeah, and Molly Burke
If you aren't in a constant state of confusion and chaos, then are you truly blind? /s
I was just googling if you can reheat halloumi and I accidentally wrote ‘can you reheat autism?’ 😂
Oops. I would love to see what Google did with that.
You can reheat autism but I recommend an oven or toaster, as the microwave can make it a bit soggy
@@jacwest7406😂😂😂
Is autism an instrument?
I'm 2.5 mins in and I really hope we address how this is a result of misogyny and the sexualization of mental illness and normal human idiosyncrasies in women as "quirkiness" and "manic pixie dream girls"
Thank you for posting this!!! It really gave me a lot to think about in terms of posting online. I struggle with getting hate comments and not sharing publicly that I'm autistic when people use that as a hate comment. I decided to keep posting on Instagram because it's what I love, and I feel more supported to not share more than I'm comfortable sharing. I love making fashion videos and art and bracelets etc. And I like having my online portfolio of that
I try not to get feelings of resentment when people say "you don't look autistic" "you don't sound autistic" "get over yourself, you're clearly capable of functioning normally", because whatever I say, it's not going to suit their narrative. So I just withdraw or go do some actually interesting stuff instead of listening to people explaining to me why I'm not austistic 🤷🏼♀️😅
Yeah. Never let someone else impose their take on what your reality is like without vetting it first. Most of the time, people say some hilariously wrong things about someone else based on a brief impression. It's quite tragic to see the lack of self awareness that leads to such overconfident takes about someone they barely understand.
@@SisypheanRollerTrue, judging is easy, understanding is hard.
The first dude getting offended FOR autistic people while they’re implied neurotypical is actually SO FUNNY TO ME LOL
I’m going to get excited when my hyperfixation gets mentioned, or when something excites me, and I don’t care if you don’t like that. It’s not glamorizing it or whatever, it’s ableist to say that???
It feels like this is what happens a lot of the time. “I’m neurotypical and offended on behalf of my autistic friend/child/whoever!”
“Okay, did they ask you to do this?”
“No”
“Then why?”
“Well, their autism makes my life harder, so I don’t want anyone to think autistic people can have joy.”
“Ah, there it is.”
@@Emma-es4dq Too self-aware and not enough cope!
This is like saying fashionable eyeglasses are trivializing blind people
I'm terrible at looking good. Proud of you. The wall of awful tends to keep me from going beyond the bare minimum.
on another note I’ve been watching so many feminine presenting autistic creators that I genuinely forgot that autism is more seen in boys and when I saw a male autistic creator recently I was shocked until I remembered that they’re the blueprint essentially 💀
(I thought it was funny to share bc of how involved I’ve been watching fem autistic creators LOL)
Same! It's been a ride, a good one
People who aren't autistic telling us it's offensive that we are autistic if we're doing well
prob bc they're offended by the idea of someone with support needs appearing to be better than them. jealousy maybe 🤷🏻♀️
the idea that happy stimming is glamorizing autism is so funny to me because shes being made fun of in the same way we all are when we stim 😂
Its like these people are saying „i know people that struggle with this, so why don’t i see you struggling? How dare you, showing yourself be happy“
The internet keeps on getting more and more toxic. Seems like theres no limit and people will keep creating new ways to shit on others they donr even know.
I wish they would take that time and creativity on lifting others up and being their best versions!
Yep and if they can’t be bothered to do that, just keeping their ignorant judgements to themselves would help a lot too.
Idk if I’m just getting older and seeing more of the ugliness out there but I’ve been feeling this too. People are so quick so say nasty things to others just because it’s through a screen
I've noticed that too. It's been vile as of late. I'm stepping back from social media a lot now because it was starting to damage my mental health
algorithms and "echo chambers", that's what generates "engagement", more views and reactions. And the user has no form of control (fB has just automated more actions in the administration/control of content of groups), many folks aren't even aware of all that
A long time ago it was written that humans will be getting pretty mean in the future, right now is starting to look kind of like that future.
The worse are the "experts" going around saying that autism numbers had gone up because of our diet. Like autism is something we can contract or develop like diabetes or HPV. Not more accessible of diagnosis or normalcy that autismis an spectrum. Are there more male autistic or less females getting accessed?
Can you link the study?@@Sarah-with-an-H
"Are there more male autistic or less females getting accessed[sic]?" this is a false dichotomy. Both can be true and there is empirical evidence to support both.
Drop the title off the study and the name of the first author and people will be able to easily search it
@@Sarah-with-an-H I agree 100% gluten and sugar definitely affects me a lot. I meant they actually saying that the child wasn't autistic at all and because of food it develop autism. Some were doctors and some were doctors interviewing scientists to justify to their pount of view.
Thank you so much for making these videos. I hope this gets far more views because you do make such important points.
This channel is incredible, these essays are top tier. Will join the pates rn.
I just wanted to comment that I’m halfway through this video and it’s unexpectedly distressing to me as someone who also grew up as the “ugly weird kid” and is now “attractive” and seeing those ignorant people comment that Paige Layle cannot possibly be autistic because with “genetic disorders, aren’t you supposed have a weird face?” like… what the fuck… So I’m going to listen to music and prepare a little more to come back to this! It is so important that you are speaking on not just this topic, but all the others that you have and I appreciate you Meg! 💟I will be back 😁
I have several craniofacial deformities, but you would not know it unless I pointed it out, and I am still told I'm quite attractive. So I guess I am allowed to be autistic because I have a "weird face" but also I'm not allowed because I have a "pretty face".
It doesn't make any sense at all because it's all ignorance and bias on the part of people who actually think disabled people are lesser humans.
@@MuchToDoAboutNowtyou’re a walking paradox! pretty cool if you ask me
but yeah complete and utter bullshit in an attempt to make people feel bad for being themselves.
Fellow "late bloomer" here who was/is considered weird. It feels like a similar sentiment to "but you're too pretty to be sad". It's a very shallow way of viewing people.
The entire reason I have a diagnosis is because I saw these creators and resonated with their videos. So there's that.
Same.
I love your shell earrings and how clearly you explain things
This video was so good for my imposter syndrome 😭 thank you and beautifully made video. Your points are always well thought out and I appreciate all of your videos!
"she's decorating her ear defenders, that's trivializing autism!1!" well i guess they're gonna have to get mad at me, too, since i pick headphones and earplugs partially based on how much i like the colors lol. i'm also thinking of adding some stickers...
are there versions that you can sleep in? i have been living in an apartment for 2 years and i am jumpy to sounds. so when i go to sleep early, if the neibhoor kids are extra stompy, I feel like I react to it like a dog in fireworks. part of me seems to be hypervigilant to a sound scaring me
I have been at some point of my life a 5-year old autistic boy… and nobody took notice (I was officially diagnosed at 47).
Just wanted to say I love your content. Thank you for making it 🖤