Lol there is never time! Time is a luxury the adhd brain doesn't have. It's like being on fast forward all the time. Like, the clocks move faster just for me.
Pick one, get started on that, then realize you have to do a different task, NOT on the list, to finish the original task. Ope... but there's something else you have to do to finish the second task. Suddenly you've spent all day completing the one task. Example: "Clean the bedroom" "Oh, I put this away in the drawer and realized that's a mess, so I need to redo all my drawers to complete cleaning the bedroom." "Ope... I should order new socks and underwear, while I was cleaning out the drawers, I realized I don't have enough." "Oh, I should pay the credit card when I place that order." "Hmm... I should go over my budget before I make a payment." "Huh... I keep losing track of my money, I should make a spreadsheet to track all my finances." "I really don't use that account, I should cancel it." "Well while I'm making phone calls, I should order a refill for my meds." "Okay I need to go to the grocery store to pick up my meds, I should do my grocery shopping while I'm there." "I should check the fridge to see what I need..." "Oh I should clean out this fridge." And on and on and on and on.
Yes, she should've dipped into her pocket for a random note and written "Learn about endangered pygmy ants". UNLESS he said "Oh, cancel those, I've got 'Study for The Big Exam'" ... in which case she'll get through that entire list AND have sorted her shoes.
I feel it is my place here as a fleetingly helpful observer to wait until you're actually working usefully on your agreed "one" topic and then casually enquire how you're going with two or three big picture things. When we've established that you haven't made any headway on them, I will try to impress upon you how important these things are, an suggest that perhaps you ought to make a list.
I love picking one, then when I'm satisfied because I did the one, I get that happy energy and I do All The Things EXCEPT the rest of the list. Yesterday I reorganized my entire film collection, started a new crochet project, cleaned my office, and got 2 weeks ahead on school all because I couldn't take half an hour to do the dishes. Pick ONE. If you're lucky, you might accidentally hyperfocus on another.
Me too lol. I then went to my closest friend of 11 year's house. She has ADHD. I helped with a few things, then looked at her extreme pile of dishes and decided to clean her sink, counters and dishes except for the ones that had live larva in it. After having bed bugs this year that was my limit lol. I knew it would help her feel less overwhelmed if I got her started and her kitchen didn't feel chaotic in the midst of the moving out chaos.
Once in a blue moon you get a great day where you get it all done so you start to wonder if you aren't actually ADHD, and then the next day you're screwed.
I once had someone tell me that if their ADHD/Neurodivergant student was having a good day, she would advise them to go home. She told me it was because once their Gen-ed teachers would see their best, their expectations for them would skyrocket to a point that the student could never achieve.
You only get ONE lmaooo. I love the acceptance of that fact...because you know why it works? Accepting you only do one will often take the pressure off enough that it -might- kickstart a productivity hyperfocus and you get them ALL done AND you also reorganize a book shelf!!!! And then you go back to 0 for the next three weeks because you can coast rip
Yeah unfortunately not for my brain😢..It's ABSOLUTELY ALL or ABSOLUTELY NOTHING... Most of the time nothing but when it finally happens, its hyper focused and fast😅
@@Musical_Maverick haha, oh nooooo! honestly i changed industries from corporate hellscape (turns out having undiagnosed ADHD means you get fired and your confidence DESTROYED from a lot of those jobs) to hospitality/wine and Im thriving....amongst my other neurodivergents, lol. The confidence bit helps loads. I know "change your career" is an extremely dramatic statement but you can find neurodivvy outlets in other places! were wayyyyy more common than you'd expect :)
Especially lately, I feel like a superhero if I manage basic hygiene. I'm basically God if I can do that AND a small load of hand washed dishes. I have to remind myself that this will change and I won't always be in *this* rut, so I don't get completely mired in depression and shame.
Today I managed laundry AND my shopping. If I can get together the motivation, I might manage a shower. It is HIGHLY unlikely that I'll manage to pack a lunch for work tomorrow, but a man can dream.
@@didemkilinc ok, brain scrambled the instructions, and I cleaned the floor instead. Still - I am apparently getting things done right now, so I'm going to ride this train as far as I can.
I’m ADHD and not loving it, my girlfriend was always getting frustrated with me before she found out how ADHD works, but then, with these TikTok’s as a gateway, used her amazing analytical and research driven brain to research everything. She has since bought your book and has been the most supportive person in my life ever since, we are on chapter 3 together. Thank you guys
I actually NEED lists. Like if it’s all floating around my head I get overwhelmed and paralyzed with inaction and then I forget things. If I write it all down, I can focus on one without fear of forgetting the others. Just don’t talk to me or ask me about the others while I’m doing one cause I’ll stress out and get distracted and never finish the first one.
Lists work, more or less until I forget/ lose em. Then find em down the line again crumpled in a pocket or bag or a notebook that I've forgotten to look at. Talk about a muddle. 🙄🤷♀️
@@spk8131duuuuuude yes! I've not been officially diagnosed with this but at one point during some stressful moments almost two years ago, when I had to explain or try to explain what I was experiencing to a family member, I had told them it was like my brain automatically absorbs everything that is happening whether I want it to or not therefore I was not able to focus, severely distracted etc etc and it was like my brain was downloading so much crap I felt like a computer 😔
Lol! I can do three on a good day. Two on a medium day. One on a bad day. And on the very bad days? Get out of bed and feed myself, are the only things I can accomplish! I love your channel and thank you so much for helping me except and be patient with myself on all of the days!
4:30 in the afternoon. Haven’t showered, haven’t dressed, haven’t eaten, but I have plowed through 8 episodes of my show while sewing on a quilt that I started 5 years ago. 😂 I can’t do anything else cuz I have a birthday party to go to at 7pm. Maybe I should shower now…
As someone who was diagnosed as an adult, I find these videos really comforting, thank you. And yeah, I plan for three items. One done is a success, two is good, three is amazing and very rare.
@@JamieDynan I often feel like I might! But I can't. I guess it's obligation. Children must be tended to regardless of how I feel. But I do not recommend renovating if you have young children and adhd and homeschool lolb
YAAAAASSSS unless of course all those tasks were somehow urgently due by tomorrow morning, in which case I will get them ALL done in the final two harrowing hours of my day.... Because if I'm not panicked, I'm not motivated. 😆
When I was at university a couple of decades ago now, I only used to start/do my essays once the deadline had passed because I knew they didn't take the bucket away (the other side of the door/post box) until 6am the next morning. I was forever grateful to knowledgeable students who passed that information down. I would stay up all night doing it, but I could not work unless I was under serious pressure, and it always worked
@@x-starlight-x oh my word! I can relate! library books . . . I know they don't check the book drop until 10 am the day after they are due. sometimes I'm dropping them off at 1am. sometimes at 9:59am!!!!
I understand this overwhelmed feeling so well. Similarly if there are a few consecutive days where there's something happening each of the days I feel overwhelmed and wish I had a days break between those days
Sometimes for me "laundry" means putting the dirty clothes in the laundry bag. Next day taking the bag infront of the washing machine, and if that wasn't a struggle put the clothes in, if I get distracted because there are other priority stuff, then the clothes go in the following day. I follow a similar rule for putting the dishes in the dishwasher and honestly I get chores done in a week instead of a month. This is why I think I might have ADHD lol
Hear, hear, I hear ya. It’s always felt like I do life on a tricycle, right next to the highway where normal people zoom through life at an automobile pace.
The hardest part is taking them out and hanging them up to dry, at least if you don't have a dryer (and no space even if you wanted one). Definitely need a high energy day for that step...
@@niwa_s Sometimes it's worth it to rewash them the next day just to avoid hanging them out. Gotta love white vinegar for getting the smell out if they get a little funky!
@@Maeda_Miakoda_Gaming I just add some laundry sanitizer by default. Goes where you'd put fabric softener, but it does nothing to the fabric, it's just antibacterial. Since bacteria are what causes the smell, it's the best prevention. Also allows me to lower the washing temp when I do have to go for multiple "launs" before I manage a "dry". Less strain on both clothes, my energy bill... and my neighbours' nerves, because re-washing usually happens at night and lower temp cycles are significantly shorter.
I go to bed every night convinced and determined I can try harder to get everything done tomorrow and make a nice list for myself. Sometimes I make it longer, sometimes I'm like I will get them done if I just focus on four main points. But either way, 99% of mornings I wake up, completely forget said list as I'm just trying to survive the day, and only remember the to do list/schedule at night or if I happen to do one of the tasks and remember it because yay I can check it off! 🤣
Pick one, and then make the minute list of all the steps that have to be done to do that one thing (put clothes on, put shoes on, pack gym bag, get into the car, drive to gym, lock the car, walk to the building, drop off stuff in locker, plan a workout, do the workout, take a shower, get dressed, go to car, etc etc etc... this is why we get overwhelmed!)
@@doe9000 When your executive function is fully functional, you can just get into a routine and not have to think about all the steps. Go to the gym? Okay, let me grab my gym bag and go. All the other stuff is just automatic. And there's no continuous multiple internal thoughts all at once. You can even take days off and get back to the routine without starting completely from zero again! Or so I hear, I'm the ADHD person getting overwhelmed by everything that has to get done to leave the house and get to the gym, and everything that has to get done once I come home, and ugh why bother when I can doomscroll instead.
My to do list today: feed the chickens, go to three grocery stores, put the groceries away, do the laundry, do the dishes, make dinner, change the sheets and take a shower. I was doing great until I got to the first grocery store, which had a terrible high pitched alarm going off in the back the whole time, which plugging my ears did not help with. I skipped the last store, got home and almost immediately had a meltdown on the pantry floor when I knocked the peach jar over. Fortunately I'm home alone and I can watch youtube shorts with a blanket over my head while I attempt to regulate my sensory overload. Lets hope I can get back out of bed before my husband comes home 😅
Yeah, you still rock even if ya' don't feel that way. But I must say I totally relate to the blanket over the head feeling. I thought I was the only one lol🙃, to kinda cope with the sensory overload type of feeling. But if it is any consolation I give you props for doing as well as you do. Even if every day is not so "productive" in that way we so often expect of ourselves. Sometimes it's OK to give ourselves a pat on the back for even just the little things. Hope that makes sense❤. Thanks for making a lot of us feel more understood and sending you all the good vibes❣
You are so sweet! Thank you! After doom scrolling for an hour or two, I pulled myself up and did a load of dishes and managed to make dinner. I still have laundry and more dishes, but I'm feeling better! Self care is the best medicine when not overused 🥰
I hope everything went well for you! Sometimes getting a nap helps reset my brain and feelings when overloaded from a bad day. It's like starting a new day when I wake up.
Your videos have helped my daughter immensely and they also help me to understand what she is feeling, and for that, I will be forever grateful to you two big thanks. 💚
Not even just getting overwhelmed. I get extreme fatigue after finishing one task its as if thats all the energy I had for the day. Other than the 1 main task, everything else is handled at random! I find that to be my best method. I don't keep a count anymore about what I'm doing and not doing anymore. Wow, I just realized that I finally found peace with this.
Written lists are okay for me just don't talk about the list while I work on that one item. When I am done we can move on to another item but I never actually finish the list.
Same. I only actually write a list when the one thing I've chosen has intricate subtasks that I need to remember like cooking a complex meal or when I have to break down a big chore into little bits to avoid overwhelm like deep-cleaning the kitchen. In all other cases, talking about or writing down a to-do list guarantees those tasks will never even be started. 😅
As a ADHD mom...this is sooo true! My daughter -ADHD- would "Clean her room" by throwing everything in the hallway and then do the ONE thing she intended to do all along.....meanwhile guess who's stuck cleaning up the hallway....🫣 And....this would consume an entire 24 he period
it's all good! :) I find making the list helps me figure out what is "important" and what is genuinely important. like yeah having a shower is "important" but actually, feeding the cat is more important, so I need to go to the shop to buy him some food. Then I can get home and feel too overwhelmed for a shower, but at least the cat will have food.
For years I’ve believed I MUST have anxiety because why else would my life feel so chaotic? At 37 I’m just now learning it wasn’t anxiety, depression, laziness, or irresponsibility….it’s ADD. Who knew?
She was on second line and I was like "yeah, write the week days on the side as well, cuz I'll probably only get to do one each day" a whole week planned right there 😅
I’ve actually started not consciously creating a list otherwise I get stressed over even the THOUGHT of having responsibilities and end up staying in bed all day🤣
I relate to this comment 100%. I have also started writing down what I actually accomplish or started, and it's a little nicer... but I'm currently laying in bed, trying to get myself into the shower.
And for me usually it's the easiest or quickest thing to finish in the list. Usually do it at night when I'm wondering how the whole day ended so soon.
This, no joke, made a major difference in how I approach house work. Ohhhhh… use hyper focus day after day to finally get organized and sorted! Many thanks for what you do 🙏🙏🙏
@@WillemPenn for me who is ADHD and autistic it’s more like “oooooh,shiny thing! I will dead ass be in a conversation with my grandmother about something serious and some make up commercial/perfume advert or something comes on the TV and I completely zone out and stare at the TV. Just the “oooooh SHINee!!”
Knew I was ADHD when I explained to my sister how I’ll make a really organized list or schedule. Feel proud, followed quickly by panic/overwhelm/anger at the jerk who made this long complicated list for me. Throw it out. Repeat cycle. She looked at me completely perplexed by this behavior.
I appreciate this so much. Cuz I constantly feel bad about only getting one thing done on the to do list and being either burnt out or the day being over already.
Omg parenting adds so much! The expectations kill me. I am constantly trying to decide which one. I've been drowning for years... add some domestic violence, and I'm not even sure if I'm going to make it many days.
Actually I just moved us out from our temporary housing and it took me weeks of piles everywhere. It happened but the last few days I ran out of gas with kids and slept in car at station with a load of stuff, it was a dark 10+ km walk either way so we just slept. Don't judge me. I'm fully aware it was my adhd that was the struggle. The hyper focus due to the deadline stress had me snapping myself out so many times a day. Clean house, though. The baby screamed while I worked, and the other two, who also have adhd just fought. We are literally wild chaos. It seems like I'm saying the same thing but really it's almost intensified because there are three of us. The baby doesn't count...yet. Anyways if you've read my life story lol thanks. And have a splendid day!! ❤
I don't technically have ADHD, but thanks to illness changing how my brain works, I now often function as if I do. Your videos really help explain so much! Despite being a former special ed teacher & parent of guys with ADD, you videos have taught me & others so much! Thank you!
These videos are strangely addicting. Plus, by watching them I see how I have some ADHD tendencies... we all do! PS Rox is super cute! Love the purple/black half and half hair.
So true. Getting just 1 always works wonder and leave the rest for next days. But never worry, I always end every day with a big thing I randomly complete.
laundry def takes aaalll my energy xD T^T. especially cause i need to go to the laundromat that adds 5 extra executive function steps + uncomfortable social interactions i absolutely have minus 5 spoons for -_-
😮🎉you all gave me the biggest compliment. It took me 3 years to be able to do up to 3 things on the list! However, it might be a few weeks before it’s revisited 😅. It really is true how every one task breeds a million little tasks, side quests, memories, creative inspirations. Thank you for showing this!
This is me! And after the ONE, the next thing is almost always a nap! Followed by “sh-t! The day’s over and I have so much I didn’t do!” It’s frustrating!
Accept and Love yourselfe like you are! Tell this every day to yourselfe and be proud of every little task (even brushing your teeth) you did. Set your Alarm for this . After one year I feel a hugh effect. Good luck! ❤
😂😂😂 and here I was thinking I was the only one in the world whose “to do” list is considered an wildly successful if I get three of my “do to’s” finished 😅😅 love your channel so much❤
I’ve watched ‘em all, and your book was delivered yesterday. I’m sure y’all get this loads, but thank you for just saying it and spreading understanding.
Thats why, no matter how im feeling, after work i do one thing because even if i can only do one thing ill still feel a lot better doing that one things than doing nothing at all and my priority is lunch for tomorrow and clothing so i often get a load of laundry in while making food
There's been a few videos I've watched of yours now. I have an adult ADHD diagnosis, and I've spent most of my life-time abusing the s*** out of myself for what is essentially ADHD. Watching these videos makes me feel less useless, and less alone. They allow me to be kind to myself. Thank you.
Often it's nearly dinner time by the time I feel motivated to cook. But of course I have to buy the ingredients first because buying them ahead of time results in waste. Go in for two items and end up coming home with twenty items but not the main ingredient. Overwhelm sets in and I resort to uber again with a promise that I'll cook that tomorrow. Waste ensues.
I had a day last week where I did like 6 things on a to do list, first time in MONTHS and it felt amazing. Now that won't happen again for another half a year. Back to struggling just to get the dishes washed and nothing else.
It's honestly been the best way to go about my day to choose one thing to do per day instead of trying to do everything and getting overwhelmed and not being able to do anything
I find this really relatable! I've said to my partner before that I feel like a character in stats-raising video game because I can choose one activity for the day and then I'm out of commission until the next!
This is close to the truth. ‘Making dinner’ for my (v fussy) family of 5 takes up about half my daily productivity & time. I hate cooking & keep trying to think of ways to get out of it!
I’d like to tell you my system for cooking when I had several children at home with me. I make a menu on Sunday, depending on what’s on sale this week, but usually I stuck to: Monday - Pasta , any kind of spaghetti, lasagna, goulash. Spaghetti is the easiest and anyone can help, boil noodles, cook meat, pour in the sauce, add extras if you have time. Tuesday was chicken, baked is easiest for me, put something on chicken pieces like cheese or oil and lemon pepper, bake about 30-45 minutes. You know you can wash and throw a whole chicken in the crockpot to cook all day. Just add spices. Wednesday was casserole, Thursday was fish (tuna casserole, or soup, sandwich and salad, Friday is always “Pizza and a Movie Night!”. Easy to remember what to buy at the grocery store . I used the crock pot about 3 times a week. But a system of Monday-Pasta, Tuesdays-chicken, Wednesday-casserole, Thursday-soup or fish, then always Friday-Pizza was nutritious and easy.
I just used chat GPT to make my grocery list and meal 🥺🥺🥺 it would take me hours of days if I was really excited about new recipes and being extra planned
This why I literally can’t make dinner or clean the car on the days that I work. Because work is the task for the day. And I’ve pretty much just given up on gums all together. If necessary, I can walk outside. I love this lady! 😅
I was scrolling earlier and one of your older videos came up. My husband finally heard someone else struggle with words like I do and he kinda got it. He speaks me just fine but the fact that you speak babes made him smile. That is love. Learning the language of unknown words and jibberish. Thank you.
This is me at work. Make a list, start at the top, get distracted by emails, or helping work colleagues, get frustrated I didn't do my "main" tasks. Become overwhelmed the next day when my list is longer. Rinse and repeat but with a progressively longer list. Fun times!
Thank you so much for helping all us neurodivergent folks feel understood & not alone; also that even with our "eccentricities" we are still able to be loved (& love others of course🙂). ❤ really love y'all's clips & videos💖.
Great, got the list and picked the one that really needs to be done. Now I'm going to putter and half-do fifteen things that weren't on the list, feeling like they're important even though they aren't, and effectively achieve nothing. Good day.
Pick one. Then, if there's time left, pick another. Or pick another if you no longer like the one you picked before.
that's it
Lol there is never time! Time is a luxury the adhd brain doesn't have. It's like being on fast forward all the time. Like, the clocks move faster just for me.
The video and this comment being this relatable 😂😅😭
Yes, diagnosed ADHD here 😂
Pick one, get started on that, then realize you have to do a different task, NOT on the list, to finish the original task. Ope... but there's something else you have to do to finish the second task. Suddenly you've spent all day completing the one task.
Example: "Clean the bedroom"
"Oh, I put this away in the drawer and realized that's a mess, so I need to redo all my drawers to complete cleaning the bedroom."
"Ope... I should order new socks and underwear, while I was cleaning out the drawers, I realized I don't have enough."
"Oh, I should pay the credit card when I place that order."
"Hmm... I should go over my budget before I make a payment."
"Huh... I keep losing track of my money, I should make a spreadsheet to track all my finances."
"I really don't use that account, I should cancel it."
"Well while I'm making phone calls, I should order a refill for my meds."
"Okay I need to go to the grocery store to pick up my meds, I should do my grocery shopping while I'm there."
"I should check the fridge to see what I need..."
"Oh I should clean out this fridge."
And on and on and on and on.
@@LazyLemming21000% all of this everyday! 😅🙋🏽♀️
Or. You make a list like that and you end up doing an entirely unrelated list of random tasks you didnt plan for.
This. I get no further, every single time. Got loads of lists, and they're not even fully complete. I just start a new one the next go 'round, haha.
Yes, she should've dipped into her pocket for a random note and written "Learn about endangered pygmy ants". UNLESS he said "Oh, cancel those, I've got 'Study for The Big Exam'" ... in which case she'll get through that entire list AND have sorted her shoes.
While wearing gym clothing.
YESS!! This! 😂🙋🏼♀️
I feel it is my place here as a fleetingly helpful observer to wait until you're actually working usefully on your agreed "one" topic and then casually enquire how you're going with two or three big picture things. When we've established that you haven't made any headway on them, I will try to impress upon you how important these things are, an suggest that perhaps you ought to make a list.
I love picking one, then when I'm satisfied because I did the one, I get that happy energy and I do All The Things EXCEPT the rest of the list. Yesterday I reorganized my entire film collection, started a new crochet project, cleaned my office, and got 2 weeks ahead on school all because I couldn't take half an hour to do the dishes.
Pick ONE. If you're lucky, you might accidentally hyperfocus on another.
Me too lol. I then went to my closest friend of 11 year's house. She has ADHD. I helped with a few things, then looked at her extreme pile of dishes and decided to clean her sink, counters and dishes except for the ones that had live larva in it. After having bed bugs this year that was my limit lol. I knew it would help her feel less overwhelmed if I got her started and her kitchen didn't feel chaotic in the midst of the moving out chaos.
@@jessenceq3250You’re a true friend🤞🏽🥲
😂meeeeeeee
why do I feel so relatable….😂
I do this too. I might get to 2 or 3 of them or get sidetracked and tackle and enormous project.
You only get. ONNNNNNE.
That enunciation emphasis expresses the struggle AND frustration so accurately.
❤
Once in a blue moon you get a great day where you get it all done so you start to wonder if you aren't actually ADHD, and then the next day you're screwed.
And that's another part of ADHD lol
I once had someone tell me that if their ADHD/Neurodivergant student was having a good day, she would advise them to go home. She told me it was because once their Gen-ed teachers would see their best, their expectations for them would skyrocket to a point that the student could never achieve.
That’s only hyper focus days. Everything and the moon have to align first. And the caffeine hit right
Haha SAME!!! Then cry in exhaustion because people start thinking you can do it all like this is now an expectation, but you can't 😂
Sounds like fibromyalgia too!!
You only get ONE lmaooo. I love the acceptance of that fact...because you know why it works? Accepting you only do one will often take the pressure off enough that it -might- kickstart a productivity hyperfocus and you get them ALL done AND you also reorganize a book shelf!!!!
And then you go back to 0 for the next three weeks because you can coast rip
Stop it. Stop describing my life 😂😂😂😭😭
THIS. Right here was so relatable I wish I knew you in person but I’m a sad alone amongst neurotypical 😂
Yeah unfortunately not for my brain😢..It's ABSOLUTELY ALL or ABSOLUTELY NOTHING... Most of the time nothing but when it finally happens, its hyper focused and fast😅
💗💗🌟🤸🏽♀️🙏🏽
@@Musical_Maverick haha, oh nooooo! honestly i changed industries from corporate hellscape (turns out having undiagnosed ADHD means you get fired and your confidence DESTROYED from a lot of those jobs) to hospitality/wine and Im thriving....amongst my other neurodivergents, lol. The confidence bit helps loads. I know "change your career" is an extremely dramatic statement but you can find neurodivvy outlets in other places! were wayyyyy more common than you'd expect :)
Most days I feel like a superhero if I can get my laundry done.
Especially lately, I feel like a superhero if I manage basic hygiene. I'm basically God if I can do that AND a small load of hand washed dishes.
I have to remind myself that this will change and I won't always be in *this* rut, so I don't get completely mired in depression and shame.
Today I managed laundry AND my shopping. If I can get together the motivation, I might manage a shower.
It is HIGHLY unlikely that I'll manage to pack a lunch for work tomorrow, but a man can dream.
@@18Hongo good luck!👍
@@didemkilinc ok, brain scrambled the instructions, and I cleaned the floor instead. Still - I am apparently getting things done right now, so I'm going to ride this train as far as I can.
She's right! Asking me to worry about more than 1 or 2 things a day is too overwhelming
I’m ADHD and not loving it, my girlfriend was always getting frustrated with me before she found out how ADHD works, but then, with these TikTok’s as a gateway, used her amazing analytical and research driven brain to research everything. She has since bought your book and has been the most supportive person in my life ever since, we are on chapter 3 together. Thank you guys
I ❤ this.
I actually NEED lists. Like if it’s all floating around my head I get overwhelmed and paralyzed with inaction and then I forget things. If I write it all down, I can focus on one without fear of forgetting the others. Just don’t talk to me or ask me about the others while I’m doing one cause I’ll stress out and get distracted and never finish the first one.
Right, I throw everything into a journal to unburden myself from those thoughts. It's like carrying around extra RAM lmao
@@spk8131 brilliant way to describe it. I think I’ll borrow that explanation in future if you don’t mind.
Lists work, more or less until I forget/ lose em. Then find em down the line again crumpled in a pocket or bag or a notebook that I've forgotten to look at. Talk about a muddle. 🙄🤷♀️
@@spk8131duuuuuude yes! I've not been officially diagnosed with this but at one point during some stressful moments almost two years ago, when I had to explain or try to explain what I was experiencing to a family member, I had told them it was like my brain automatically absorbs everything that is happening whether I want it to or not therefore I was not able to focus, severely distracted etc etc and it was like my brain was downloading so much crap I felt like a computer 😔
ME OMG
Lol! I can do three on a good day. Two on a medium day. One on a bad day. And on the very bad days? Get out of bed and feed myself, are the only things I can accomplish! I love your channel and thank you so much for helping me except and be patient with myself on all of the days!
4:30 in the afternoon. Haven’t showered, haven’t dressed, haven’t eaten, but I have plowed through 8 episodes of my show while sewing on a quilt that I started 5 years ago. 😂 I can’t do anything else cuz I have a birthday party to go to at 7pm. Maybe I should shower now…
You get to eat on a bad day? Wow, how do you do that?
I just woke up my entire apartment building busting out laughing at this! So accurate it's hilarious 🤣🤣🤣
As someone who was diagnosed as an adult, I find these videos really comforting, thank you.
And yeah, I plan for three items. One done is a success, two is good, three is amazing and very rare.
Seconding this!
same. except I have young children. and we homeschool. and we are in the middle of a full house renovation. so I have to
Oh, i like this system!
@@kimberliana5111 how do you not just crack up and do NOTHING?
@@JamieDynan I often feel like I might! But I can't. I guess it's obligation. Children must be tended to regardless of how I feel. But I do not recommend renovating if you have young children and adhd and homeschool lolb
YAAAAASSSS unless of course all those tasks were somehow urgently due by tomorrow morning, in which case I will get them ALL done in the final two harrowing hours of my day.... Because if I'm not panicked, I'm not motivated. 😆
There's a dopamine monkey in charge of my brain, and the only thing he's scared of is the panic monster!
😂 omg the both of you. So accurate
When I was at university a couple of decades ago now, I only used to start/do my essays once the deadline had passed because I knew they didn't take the bucket away (the other side of the door/post box) until 6am the next morning. I was forever grateful to knowledgeable students who passed that information down. I would stay up all night doing it, but I could not work unless I was under serious pressure, and it always worked
@@x-starlight-x oh my word! I can relate! library books . . . I know they don't check the book drop until 10 am the day after they are due. sometimes I'm dropping them off at 1am. sometimes at 9:59am!!!!
@@desslou I'M USING THAT. I love it so much 😂
Yes! I feel more overwhelmed because you have to live up to other people’s standards and if you’re not doing enough, then you’re “lazy”
I understand this overwhelmed feeling so well. Similarly if there are a few consecutive days where there's something happening each of the days I feel overwhelmed and wish I had a days break between those days
Truth! Its a good day when you actually finish that ONE.
Fact!
Yes, you are so correct - it's like magic when that happens :)
Ok so I'm not as broken as I thought
Sometimes for me "laundry" means putting the dirty clothes in the laundry bag. Next day taking the bag infront of the washing machine, and if that wasn't a struggle put the clothes in, if I get distracted because there are other priority stuff, then the clothes go in the following day. I follow a similar rule for putting the dishes in the dishwasher and honestly I get chores done in a week instead of a month. This is why I think I might have ADHD lol
Sometimes I tap out halfway through the washing up and just have to abandon the whole kitchen. 😂
Hear, hear, I hear ya.
It’s always felt like I do life on a tricycle, right next to the highway where normal people zoom through life at an automobile pace.
The hardest part is taking them out and hanging them up to dry, at least if you don't have a dryer (and no space even if you wanted one). Definitely need a high energy day for that step...
@@niwa_s Sometimes it's worth it to rewash them the next day just to avoid hanging them out. Gotta love white vinegar for getting the smell out if they get a little funky!
@@Maeda_Miakoda_Gaming I just add some laundry sanitizer by default. Goes where you'd put fabric softener, but it does nothing to the fabric, it's just antibacterial. Since bacteria are what causes the smell, it's the best prevention.
Also allows me to lower the washing temp when I do have to go for multiple "launs" before I manage a "dry". Less strain on both clothes, my energy bill... and my neighbours' nerves, because re-washing usually happens at night and lower temp cycles are significantly shorter.
I go to bed every night convinced and determined I can try harder to get everything done tomorrow and make a nice list for myself. Sometimes I make it longer, sometimes I'm like I will get them done if I just focus on four main points. But either way, 99% of mornings I wake up, completely forget said list as I'm just trying to survive the day, and only remember the to do list/schedule at night or if I happen to do one of the tasks and remember it because yay I can check it off! 🤣
Damn, Im always getting overwhelmed when I just have one
Pick one, and then make the minute list of all the steps that have to be done to do that one thing (put clothes on, put shoes on, pack gym bag, get into the car, drive to gym, lock the car, walk to the building, drop off stuff in locker, plan a workout, do the workout, take a shower, get dressed, go to car, etc etc etc... this is why we get overwhelmed!)
THIS
No, not the shower! Do I have to wash my hair too?! 😅
@@LadyPelikan Don't get me started on the steps of all the subtasks! 😆
do neurotypical people really not think of it like that?
@@doe9000 When your executive function is fully functional, you can just get into a routine and not have to think about all the steps. Go to the gym? Okay, let me grab my gym bag and go. All the other stuff is just automatic. And there's no continuous multiple internal thoughts all at once. You can even take days off and get back to the routine without starting completely from zero again! Or so I hear, I'm the ADHD person getting overwhelmed by everything that has to get done to leave the house and get to the gym, and everything that has to get done once I come home, and ugh why bother when I can doomscroll instead.
My to do list today: feed the chickens, go to three grocery stores, put the groceries away, do the laundry, do the dishes, make dinner, change the sheets and take a shower. I was doing great until I got to the first grocery store, which had a terrible high pitched alarm going off in the back the whole time, which plugging my ears did not help with. I skipped the last store, got home and almost immediately had a meltdown on the pantry floor when I knocked the peach jar over. Fortunately I'm home alone and I can watch youtube shorts with a blanket over my head while I attempt to regulate my sensory overload. Lets hope I can get back out of bed before my husband comes home 😅
oh feel you. you are doing better than you think.
Yeah, you still rock even if ya' don't feel that way. But I must say I totally relate to the blanket over the head feeling. I thought I was the only one lol🙃, to kinda cope with the sensory overload type of feeling.
But if it is any consolation I give you props for doing as well as you do. Even if every day is not so "productive" in that way we so often expect of ourselves. Sometimes it's OK to give ourselves a pat on the back for even just the little things. Hope that makes sense❤. Thanks for making a lot of us feel more understood and sending you all the good vibes❣
You are so sweet! Thank you! After doom scrolling for an hour or two, I pulled myself up and did a load of dishes and managed to make dinner. I still have laundry and more dishes, but I'm feeling better! Self care is the best medicine when not overused 🥰
Aww ive had one of those. Glad there are more of us😊❤
I hope everything went well for you! Sometimes getting a nap helps reset my brain and feelings when overloaded from a bad day. It's like starting a new day when I wake up.
Your videos have helped my daughter immensely and they also help me to understand what she is feeling, and for that, I will be forever grateful to you two big thanks. 💚
“Oh admin LOVELY” 😂😂 we all know how ADHD does with admin!
Not even just getting overwhelmed. I get extreme fatigue after finishing one task its as if thats all the energy I had for the day. Other than the 1 main task, everything else is handled at random!
I find that to be my best method. I don't keep a count anymore about what I'm doing and not doing anymore. Wow, I just realized that I finally found peace with this.
Written lists are okay for me just don't talk about the list while I work on that one item. When I am done we can move on to another item but I never actually finish the list.
Ahaha I'm the same. Sometimes it feels like my productivity is some wild animal. Like, don't spook it!
Same. I only actually write a list when the one thing I've chosen has intricate subtasks that I need to remember like cooking a complex meal or when I have to break down a big chore into little bits to avoid overwhelm like deep-cleaning the kitchen. In all other cases, talking about or writing down a to-do list guarantees those tasks will never even be started. 😅
As a ADHD mom...this is sooo true! My daughter -ADHD- would "Clean her room" by throwing everything in the hallway and then do the ONE thing she intended to do all along.....meanwhile guess who's stuck cleaning up the hallway....🫣
And....this would consume an entire 24 he period
it's all good! :) I find making the list helps me figure out what is "important" and what is genuinely important. like yeah having a shower is "important" but actually, feeding the cat is more important, so I need to go to the shop to buy him some food. Then I can get home and feel too overwhelmed for a shower, but at least the cat will have food.
I like the heavy emphasis on “you only get one” 😂😂 so true
For years I’ve believed I MUST have anxiety because why else would my life feel so chaotic?
At 37 I’m just now learning it wasn’t anxiety, depression, laziness, or irresponsibility….it’s ADD. Who knew?
She was on second line and I was like "yeah, write the week days on the side as well, cuz I'll probably only get to do one each day" a whole week planned right there 😅
I am so happy I found this channel and the people in It's comments! Feel less alone!
The more i watch these adhd influencer sketches the more i feel like i have it aswell, so many pieces just fall into place
I’ve actually started not consciously creating a list otherwise I get stressed over even the THOUGHT of having responsibilities and end up staying in bed all day🤣
I relate to this comment 100%. I have also started writing down what I actually accomplish or started, and it's a little nicer... but I'm currently laying in bed, trying to get myself into the shower.
Yeah relatable, I kind of just keep a couple of "ideas" floating about in my brain as optionals and don't hold myself to them so I don't spiral lol
Yeah... My level of dysfunction doesn't even allow lists...
Haha, I write a long to do list everyday… and only end up doing one 😭
And for me usually it's the easiest or quickest thing to finish in the list. Usually do it at night when I'm wondering how the whole day ended so soon.
Then my list gets so long I abandon the to do list
This, no joke, made a major difference in how I approach house work.
Ohhhhh… use hyper focus day after day to finally get organized and sorted!
Many thanks for what you do 🙏🙏🙏
Main task and backup to do list. No pressure.
Laundry for me. And I've been avoiding it ALL day
ive rewashed and abandoned the same load of towels 6 times over 13 days because I keep forgetting to dry it....for days
I've been avoiding it all year lmao. I just keep washing the clothes I use the most and the rest is used to make my room look like iraq.
I'm heading in to start on a few of my many loads!! We got this!! ❤🎉
@@pourpeopledrinks been there! I use vinegar to get the wet moldy smell out. Safe for most fabrics too
@@missdirectedawakeningYes! Absolutely!
So true...
I honestly expected you to just erase half the list at random, because that's what my brain does.
And add “squirrel!” to the list repeatedly and randomly.
@@WillemPenn for me who is ADHD and autistic it’s more like “oooooh,shiny thing!
I will dead ass be in a conversation with my grandmother about something serious and some make up commercial/perfume advert or something comes on the TV and I completely zone out and stare at the TV.
Just the “oooooh SHINee!!”
I've intended to do laundry 4 days in a row now. Today is the day.
That’s exactly how I plan my day too.Most of my life, I really thought I was the only one.
Thank you so much for making these videos. My sister has ADHD, and these videos help me understand where she's coming from. ❤
I hate being this way.
I wish my brain worked right.
That's so true! And after doing 1 thing I HAVE to reward myself 😊
The way she says you only GET ONNNEEEE. Ya, gotta pick. Pick one!
Hilariously enough, after I showed this to my husband he sat there, "But your not that bad," and then I explained exactly what you just did.
You two are so real and funny and cute 💙😅
Knew I was ADHD when I explained to my sister how I’ll make a really organized list or schedule. Feel proud, followed quickly by panic/overwhelm/anger at the jerk who made this long complicated list for me. Throw it out. Repeat cycle.
She looked at me completely perplexed by this behavior.
They both are so cute. You have marked my life. So funny how she said... You only get "onnnnne"
It's gonna really blow his mind to learn there are days you only get less than one 🤯
I appreciate this so much. Cuz I constantly feel bad about only getting one thing done on the to do list and being either burnt out or the day being over already.
Oh my gosh I just love you! TY so much! Cannot stop laughing!
Literally get overwhelmed even before it begins swear
Omg parenting adds so much! The expectations kill me. I am constantly trying to decide which one. I've been drowning for years... add some domestic violence, and I'm not even sure if I'm going to make it many days.
Actually I just moved us out from our temporary housing and it took me weeks of piles everywhere. It happened but the last few days I ran out of gas with kids and slept in car at station with a load of stuff, it was a dark 10+ km walk either way so we just slept. Don't judge me. I'm fully aware it was my adhd that was the struggle. The hyper focus due to the deadline stress had me snapping myself out so many times a day. Clean house, though. The baby screamed while I worked, and the other two, who also have adhd just fought. We are literally wild chaos. It seems like I'm saying the same thing but really it's almost intensified because there are three of us. The baby doesn't count...yet. Anyways if you've read my life story lol thanks. And have a splendid day!! ❤
This is such a great way to explain this lol, it's exactly this
That sounds like the most exhausting day imaginable 😂
These shorts are hillarious and spot on!
Truest thing you will hear. Everytime I see these videos I relate to them
I don't technically have ADHD, but thanks to illness changing how my brain works, I now often function as if I do. Your videos really help explain so much! Despite being a former special ed teacher & parent of guys with ADD, you videos have taught me & others so much! Thank you!
These videos are strangely addicting. Plus, by watching them I see how I have some ADHD tendencies... we all do! PS Rox is super cute! Love the purple/black half and half hair.
So true. Getting just 1 always works wonder and leave the rest for next days. But never worry, I always end every day with a big thing I randomly complete.
laundry def takes aaalll my energy xD T^T. especially cause i need to go to the laundromat that adds 5 extra executive function steps + uncomfortable social interactions i absolutely have minus 5 spoons for -_-
Look into a portable washer, it'll part for itself by not going to the laundromat. It's the best for apartment life.
Totally !
I was generally cool with Laundry at home.
Nowadays gotta hit the Laundry Mat . Couple loads.
So that day is a wrap.
😁🫠
😮🎉you all gave me the biggest compliment. It took me 3 years to be able to do up to 3 things on the list! However, it might be a few weeks before it’s revisited 😅.
It really is true how every one task breeds a million little tasks, side quests, memories, creative inspirations.
Thank you for showing this!
This is me! And after the ONE, the next thing is almost always a nap! Followed by “sh-t! The day’s over and I have so much I didn’t do!” It’s frustrating!
And sometimes, you get overwhelmed even thinking about it. Whoo.
It takes me all day to pick one and then there is no time to get it done.
That hit hard cause it feels like you need everything to be done to start working on another thing
Accept and Love yourselfe like you are!
Tell this every day to yourselfe and be proud of every little task (even brushing your teeth) you did. Set your Alarm for this .
After one year I feel a hugh effect. Good luck! ❤
YOU ARE RHE BEST DESCRIBER OF ADHD BRAIN EVER AND YOU A NATIONAL TREASURE 🫡😂🥳
😂😂😂 and here I was thinking I was the only one in the world whose “to do” list is considered an wildly successful if I get three of my “do to’s” finished 😅😅 love your channel so much❤
I’ve watched ‘em all, and your book was delivered yesterday. I’m sure y’all get this loads, but thank you for just saying it and spreading understanding.
Me just reading the to do list made me overwhelmed, so many tasks so much brain activity and less body movement
These videos are blowing my mind. I NEVER KNEW that anyone else had these struggles or that it was ADHD causing them.
The Additude website is a goldmine of information. And the private Facebook groups are great too.
Thats why, no matter how im feeling, after work i do one thing because even if i can only do one thing ill still feel a lot better doing that one things than doing nothing at all and my priority is lunch for tomorrow and clothing so i often get a load of laundry in while making food
This is absolutely facts, took me YEARS of daily practice to be able get multiple thi gs done
You two are fantastic. So loving. And spot on.
Love the way she looks at him its gold
I’ve been sleeping all day even though I have to change my sheets and the laundry is looking me.
There's been a few videos I've watched of yours now. I have an adult ADHD diagnosis, and I've spent most of my life-time abusing the s*** out of myself for what is essentially ADHD. Watching these videos makes me feel less useless, and less alone. They allow me to be kind to myself. Thank you.
I don’t always associate directly with her but this one is spot on.
When I start the day with gym, I can do 2 or 3 more things afterward. The focus and calmness after working out really helps.
"One" IF I'm on my meds 😂
But most of my life, it's been me constantly wondering how it's possible to accomplish -1 task within a day.
Often it's nearly dinner time by the time I feel motivated to cook. But of course I have to buy the ingredients first because buying them ahead of time results in waste. Go in for two items and end up coming home with twenty items but not the main ingredient. Overwhelm sets in and I resort to uber again with a promise that I'll cook that tomorrow. Waste ensues.
I had a day last week where I did like 6 things on a to do list, first time in MONTHS and it felt amazing. Now that won't happen again for another half a year. Back to struggling just to get the dishes washed and nothing else.
What more does he want. The list in and of itself is an accomplishment. 😊
It's honestly been the best way to go about my day to choose one thing to do per day instead of trying to do everything and getting overwhelmed and not being able to do anything
I tried the at least three things and got overwhelmed and didn’t do any of them. Smh, I have to try this out.
So true. Most times, i will just jump up and end up rushing through the whole list in less than a hour, and covered in sweat.
I find this really relatable! I've said to my partner before that I feel like a character in stats-raising video game because I can choose one activity for the day and then I'm out of commission until the next!
This is close to the truth. ‘Making dinner’ for my (v fussy) family of 5 takes up about half my daily productivity & time. I hate cooking & keep trying to think of ways to get out of it!
I’d like to tell you my system for cooking when I had several children at home with me. I make a menu on Sunday, depending on what’s on sale this week, but usually I stuck to: Monday - Pasta , any kind of spaghetti, lasagna, goulash. Spaghetti is the easiest and anyone can help, boil noodles, cook meat, pour in the sauce, add extras if you have time. Tuesday was chicken, baked is easiest for me, put something on chicken pieces like cheese or oil and lemon pepper, bake about 30-45 minutes. You know you can wash and throw a whole chicken in the crockpot to cook all day. Just add spices. Wednesday was casserole, Thursday was fish (tuna casserole, or soup, sandwich and salad, Friday is always “Pizza and a Movie Night!”. Easy to remember what to buy at the grocery store . I used the crock pot about 3 times a week. But a system of Monday-Pasta, Tuesdays-chicken, Wednesday-casserole, Thursday-soup or fish, then always Friday-Pizza was nutritious and easy.
@@naturesgateway Thank you - that’s really kind of you to share that! X
Instapot.
I just used chat GPT to make my grocery list and meal 🥺🥺🥺 it would take me hours of days if I was really excited about new recipes and being extra planned
i'm so sorry your spouse doesn't help. unbalanced division of labor is insanely unfair
What about getting distracted by an invasive thought while you’re making the list and then you forget what you were just about to write down
This why I literally can’t make dinner or clean the car on the days that I work. Because work is the task for the day. And I’ve pretty much just given up on gums all together. If necessary, I can walk outside. I love this lady! 😅
I've never been diagnosed but your vids are so relatable, not more so than this one.
Watching these makes me feel so much better about myself.
Literally make lists just to tell myself "pick one" lol. But seriously, these two deserve humanitarian awards I swear I've never felt more understood!
I was scrolling earlier and one of your older videos came up. My husband finally heard someone else struggle with words like I do and he kinda got it. He speaks me just fine but the fact that you speak babes made him smile.
That is love. Learning the language of unknown words and jibberish. Thank you.
After having cancer twice and a stroke I completely agree with getting one task done being a WIN.
This is me at work. Make a list, start at the top, get distracted by emails, or helping work colleagues, get frustrated I didn't do my "main" tasks. Become overwhelmed the next day when my list is longer. Rinse and repeat but with a progressively longer list. Fun times!
I feel so freaking validated by this 😭😭😭😭 thank you for all of your posts.
Thank you so much for helping all us neurodivergent folks feel understood & not alone; also that even with our "eccentricities" we are still able to be loved (& love others of course🙂). ❤ really love y'all's clips & videos💖.
This is what I go through everyday. I get seriously overwhelmed if I try to do more than one thing a day.
Great, got the list and picked the one that really needs to be done.
Now I'm going to putter and half-do fifteen things that weren't on the list, feeling like they're important even though they aren't, and effectively achieve nothing.
Good day.