Your Second Child Is A Different Story - David Dyer

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  • @SarahLizDoan
    @SarahLizDoan 5 років тому +447

    “Dad” implies a level of commitment I’m not always up for. Rotfl....

    • @universalenergy2311
      @universalenergy2311 5 років тому +3

      Sarah Doan That was such a true statement! 😆 I needed to here that from another father.

    • @kagerf
      @kagerf 5 років тому +3

      I haven't used rotfl since 2012

    • @Bwubblezx3
      @Bwubblezx3 5 років тому +1

      It’s just rofl

  • @llamasugar5478
    @llamasugar5478 5 років тому +339

    People with kids will find this funny, but you have to know your audience.
    I was once out with two single friends, and was telling them about my chickens. One remarked, “You talk about them like they’re your kids!” Without thinking, I replied, “Some days, I like them MORE than my kids!”
    Awkward silence.

    • @rd4469
      @rd4469 5 років тому +8

      @Llama Sugar...I like my chicken's better than people too. I don't have children. 🤣🤣

    • @iselinemendoza9819
      @iselinemendoza9819 5 років тому +20

      Seriously ... My coworker was like i love all kids and i was like i do too except the ugly ones as soon as theyre bad my patience is at zero ... She didnt talk to me much after

    • @user-pd8mi7ng7s
      @user-pd8mi7ng7s 5 років тому +6

      @@iselinemendoza9819 🤣 that's funny because it's so true!

    • @ezmeraldadudortoka7549
      @ezmeraldadudortoka7549 5 років тому

      All What I Love What's next then? What will you justify all under the name of comedy? What if the guy was up there joking about raping your children? Would you be okay with that and just call it comedy? Just because you don't feel the same way about something as somebody else does doesn't make it less important.

    • @kurimsonkitsune4408
      @kurimsonkitsune4408 5 років тому

      @@ezmeraldadudortoka7549 uh dude that's obviously over the line. Everyone has days when even they don't want to be around the people they love the most. Saying something like, "sometime I like them more than my kids." is completely different than joking about wishing HARM MOST FOUL UPON THEM geewiz.
      That being said though this type of humor isn't really my cup of tea but I'm not offended by it.

  • @GotaBeTrue
    @GotaBeTrue 5 років тому +150

    "so she's not moving out"

  • @CJ4Him
    @CJ4Him 5 років тому +89

    ...Today I’m just Dave, ok?!😂

  • @MeOhMyOh2324
    @MeOhMyOh2324 5 років тому +127

    Then the third one sends you completely over the edge 😂

    • @rd4469
      @rd4469 5 років тому +2

      @Rammer Jammer....Hey now, I'm the third child and last in my family. 🤣🤣🤣

    • @MeOhMyOh2324
      @MeOhMyOh2324 5 років тому +1

      R Dy I was actually the fourth child and I think I did my parents completely in 😂😂

    • @MeOhMyOh2324
      @MeOhMyOh2324 5 років тому

      But I have three and it was definitely a game changer!

    • @mataramoore2777
      @mataramoore2777 5 років тому +2

      Rammer Jammer I’m a third child 😂😂😂 but also the favorite

  • @rixpix2957
    @rixpix2957 5 років тому +379

    I really don't care what kind of planet they're left with!😄

  • @mbyrd6713
    @mbyrd6713 5 років тому +12

    Raising teenagers is such a challenge sometimes, thanks for the laughter. I really needed it 😉

  • @TheSnowReport28
    @TheSnowReport28 5 років тому +204

    My third kid is the one who is naked in the dirt in the backyard every day 😂

    • @thephoenix2176
      @thephoenix2176 5 років тому +1

      😆

    • @msthang5366
      @msthang5366 5 років тому +4

      Louise Louise 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂

    • @Dirtbag-Hyena
      @Dirtbag-Hyena 5 років тому +4

      Mud pies taste better than momma's cook'n😁

    • @_amoopoint_1458
      @_amoopoint_1458 5 років тому +3

      Oh wow. I literally video taped my 3rd baby, naked in the veggie patch playing in the dirt. 😂

    • @laurynnakitare4025
      @laurynnakitare4025 5 років тому

      That was me growing up,a third child,I was always the trouble maker.

  • @IntrepidFraidyCat
    @IntrepidFraidyCat 5 років тому +108

    My 11 year old calling "MOM!" for the 20th time today....
    Me...."She ran away!"😜

  • @gratituderanch9406
    @gratituderanch9406 5 років тому +83

    Hahahahahaha my third child pooped a rock, and the only thing that concerned me was making sure my first (who said it looked like a chocolate chip) did NOT taste it. 🤦🏼‍♀️😂🙃

    • @msthang5366
      @msthang5366 5 років тому

      Gratitude Ranch 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣😂😂😂

    • @patriciad5256
      @patriciad5256 5 років тому

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @user-pd8mi7ng7s
      @user-pd8mi7ng7s 5 років тому +4

      Hey it passed so there's no need for concern . Gotta roll with those punches

    • @annexsis5181
      @annexsis5181 3 роки тому

      Wtf🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @cinelife9901
    @cinelife9901 4 роки тому +3

    I absolutely love this man. I actually laughed loud...
    I have one hyperactive son and he drives me nuts. Frankly I don't have the courage to have a second one..
    Kudos to all parents of 2 children !!!.

  • @dippster357
    @dippster357 5 років тому +14

    This was a very good set this guy did it’s especially good when the crowd is very much into it

    • @mrreymundo5383
      @mrreymundo5383 5 років тому +2

      It is Utah, so we all have kids... :-)

    • @a.k.4085
      @a.k.4085 5 років тому +1

      Mr Reymundo 😄 I didn't know this was in UT but good point.

  • @Uwontregretit101
    @Uwontregretit101 5 років тому +39

    Ok yea. Welp she is not moving out.. lmaooo🤣🤣

    • @1health3
      @1health3 5 років тому +3

      😂😂😂 Was going to post, saw already done. Too FUNNY!!! 😂

  • @Vinnafetish
    @Vinnafetish 5 років тому +21

    Very highly relatable😂❤👍🏽

  • @yas4346
    @yas4346 5 років тому +11

    Who's here also the second child?

  • @rosaazul88
    @rosaazul88 5 років тому +12

    Let's see what happens here 😂🤣. Yup I'm like hey you're gonna fall.....BAM 😭 I'm like yup that happened you didn't listen

  • @MichaelEMJAYJohnson
    @MichaelEMJAYJohnson 5 років тому +3

    I have 2 daughters and 2 sons.....I can relate 1000%

  • @barbarahering484
    @barbarahering484 5 років тому +12

    Two kids great , man on man , three kids nope then your playing zone defense.

  • @younglady2789
    @younglady2789 5 років тому +7

    Thanks for making me laugh!

  • @gsdfan8455
    @gsdfan8455 5 років тому +35

    Let’s see what happens here. 😂

  • @Samestori214
    @Samestori214 5 років тому +58

    I got four! YES 4!!! Teenage girls & 2 Teenage boys & 2 boys pre teens.
    Those in the tribulation will have a vacation compared to my life. 🤣🤣🤣

    • @user-pe1kj3ni5q
      @user-pe1kj3ni5q 5 років тому +5

      Check your math

    • @m35926
      @m35926 5 років тому +6

      @@user-pe1kj3ni5q he lost count at 4

    • @jessislistless
      @jessislistless 5 років тому +6

      @@user-pe1kj3ni5q that's not wrong. They're saying they have 4 teenage girls AND in addition they have 2 teenage boys

    • @Samestori214
      @Samestori214 5 років тому +10

      I lost count at 3😂😂
      I have 8 lovely children.But most of the time I say they belong to my wife!🤣🤣🤣🤣
      🏃🏽‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♂️🤷🏽‍♀️🏃🏾‍♂️🏃🏽‍♀️🏃🏾‍♂️🏃🏾‍♂️🏇🏾
      18/17/16/15/14/13/12/10
      📈💸

    • @Samestori214
      @Samestori214 5 років тому +5

      I'm not that good at English. My Major was Diaper changing 😆😆

  • @ShadowNymph2010
    @ShadowNymph2010 5 років тому +3

    As the mother of an only, I feel intelligent & blessed 🤓😆

  • @debraj.thomas661
    @debraj.thomas661 5 років тому +4

    I'm a second child! We break the mold in parenting skills!! Haha

  • @ladyinky882
    @ladyinky882 5 років тому +5

    This guy is good!

  • @beautifulleaves8616
    @beautifulleaves8616 5 років тому +1

    Oh no my mom said my older brother and I were a breeze. Now my twin sister, the third child was difficult but the FOURTH (12 and 16 years younger than everyone) well he's a force to be reckoned with, drives us insane but how can you not love him when he's so cute

  • @robertboekee8733
    @robertboekee8733 5 років тому +28

    Ornathologist LOL

  • @Loftusgirl
    @Loftusgirl 5 років тому +1

    Love this guy!

  • @cindyjencks5848
    @cindyjencks5848 5 років тому +5

    He is really funny.

  • @aladent
    @aladent 5 років тому +14

    Funny stuff! Why can't I find your full show? When I hit the link, it says not found.

  • @ladyinky882
    @ladyinky882 5 років тому +4

    Sadly You are not on my Dry Bar App and the link in the description does not work either.

  • @chrissym3869
    @chrissym3869 5 років тому +2

    Roflmao This guy should be on tv !!!!!!!

  • @karenwaldrop2307
    @karenwaldrop2307 5 років тому +1

    Absolutely hilarious!

  • @tubeyou89119
    @tubeyou89119 5 років тому

    Sometimes when my kid calls out for me, I reply "she is not here."

  • @renav766
    @renav766 5 років тому +8

    First daughter I swatted her hands whenever she tried to stick her finger in a light socket the second daughter I had to put light socket covers cuz she stuck a bobby pin in a light socket jolted her enough to scare her thank God she wasn't hurt but that way she learns.

    • @isabelp3425
      @isabelp3425 5 років тому

      That was me. 🤣. And I'm the oldest! It all went downhill from there 7 kids later. 😂

    • @overcomer4226
      @overcomer4226 5 років тому

      My aunt stuck a key in a light socket. Light sockets must be like crack cocaine for kids

    • @EndlessSummer888
      @EndlessSummer888 4 роки тому

      Sounds like what Jeff Allen (also on this channel) said. "We all did dumb things, that's how you learn not to do dumb things!"

  • @heidimarchant5438
    @heidimarchant5438 5 років тому +3

    So true ya'll 😂

  • @chrissysconvos
    @chrissysconvos 5 років тому

    I'm on kid 4 so I totally get it 😂😂😂

  • @zoetbulle8919
    @zoetbulle8919 5 років тому

    All these adults dying of laughter in this comment section. Refreshing

  • @elsvenjo8603
    @elsvenjo8603 5 років тому +2

    Grear advice..i have 2 stepsons...tomorrow i will be just Sven. And Sven hasn't 20$, Sorry!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @9290SC
    @9290SC 5 років тому +2

    lol funny!!

  • @34Packardphaeton
    @34Packardphaeton 5 років тому +2

    My children never asked me for a dime. I can't tell anyone why . . . .

  • @beyondviolet
    @beyondviolet 5 років тому +1

    I’m the second child :/

  • @butchp1384
    @butchp1384 5 років тому

    Hilarious!

  • @lindaleelaw5277
    @lindaleelaw5277 5 років тому +1

    Teenage daughters: Mother Nature's bad weather

  • @zlee001
    @zlee001 3 роки тому

    And you wonder why people have middle child syndrome.

  • @ava_adamsg
    @ava_adamsg 5 років тому

    Um you had these kids. U better believe u have a commitment. Js

  • @dalemason4251
    @dalemason4251 5 років тому

    Lmao buggers please.

  • @هالةصغير
    @هالةصغير 5 років тому +2

    Funny

  • @aqua-mina
    @aqua-mina 5 років тому

    😂

  • @StrongnBeautiful
    @StrongnBeautiful 5 років тому +8

    White parents..smh..ya'll do it to yourself. You have to TRAIN these people!

    • @amandawalker4797
      @amandawalker4797 5 років тому +1

      What does race have to do with this?

    • @brigittem2231
      @brigittem2231 5 років тому

      @@amandawalker4797 stereotypes of being "pushover" parents

  • @MsMusic4dance
    @MsMusic4dance 5 років тому +2

    Get a fork

  • @paulaherzog9616
    @paulaherzog9616 5 років тому

    X

  • @aubreymanry9030
    @aubreymanry9030 5 років тому +3

    Wow first

  • @ruthparker1140
    @ruthparker1140 5 років тому

    No. Just. No.

  • @carolinabarbershop
    @carolinabarbershop 5 років тому +4

    Someone timestamp when the comedy actually begins.

    • @wickandde
      @wickandde 5 років тому +1

      It doesn't

    • @a.k.4085
      @a.k.4085 5 років тому

      Senses of humor I see. 👌👍

  • @embrymilo5316
    @embrymilo5316 5 років тому

    Um, I want to be an exotic rainforest naturalist. And I’m pretty sure I’m going to be moving out. Seriously dude, have some respect for fellow humans.
    I mean, I prefer my animals to people, but I still respect humans.

  • @Muji-Exempt
    @Muji-Exempt 5 років тому +6

    I've noticed a trend where comedians tell their life story as a parent because parenting has apparently become a joke.

    • @jpslim7279
      @jpslim7279 5 років тому +5

      Vince Y. - It's called writing material from personal experience. Literally all comedians do it. You don't notice as much as you think.

    • @Muji-Exempt
      @Muji-Exempt 5 років тому

      @@jpslim7279 that's cute. Seems like you completely missed the butt of the joke there Mr. Comedy expert.😂

    • @jpslim7279
      @jpslim7279 5 років тому +1

      Vince Y. - that’s precious. You think because you comment on a comedy video that you are a comedian.

  • @dubilam4006
    @dubilam4006 5 років тому

    i know this is comedy but a lot of the things he said is truly not okay and just sad to hear

  • @wickandde
    @wickandde 5 років тому +2

    This one really didn't do it for me Drybar, usually your comedians are excellent though

    • @LNSMITH-iq6ye
      @LNSMITH-iq6ye 5 років тому +4

      U must be a teenage girl 😅😅😅

    • @a.k.4085
      @a.k.4085 5 років тому

      @@LNSMITH-iq6ye 👌 😁

  • @ezmeraldadudortoka7549
    @ezmeraldadudortoka7549 5 років тому +3

    Uhh...your daughters should be the biggest reason you should care about climate change...🤦‍♂️

    • @dcarts5616
      @dcarts5616 5 років тому +7

      Turtle Dortoka oh shut the living phuck up.

    • @ezmeraldadudortoka7549
      @ezmeraldadudortoka7549 5 років тому +2

      @@dcarts5616 No. You just shut the living phuck up...

    • @wickandde
      @wickandde 5 років тому +4

      Yeah that bit put me off a bit, I get he's trying to be comedic but climate change isn't funny at all

    • @allwhatilove914
      @allwhatilove914 5 років тому +14

      Oh gosh! It's called COMEDY! Or you think he really wanted to punch the baby with a fork too. Turn off your political correctness police radio station when watching something funny.

    • @ezmeraldadudortoka7549
      @ezmeraldadudortoka7549 5 років тому +1

      @@allwhatilove914 No. Joking about my daughter's future is not funny nor entertaining. Not getting upset at something like this just means you're the problem. That's just being selfishly lazy.

  • @mbyrd6713
    @mbyrd6713 5 років тому +44

    Raising teenagers is such a challenge sometimes, thanks for the laughter. I really needed it 😉