Who Pays On A Date? What Women MUST Do!

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  • Опубліковано 28 вер 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 5 тис.

  • @jigishakumar6130
    @jigishakumar6130 4 роки тому +2799

    Even my male bestfriend doesn't let me pay for small things like coffee.

    • @lollol-uh5pw
      @lollol-uh5pw 4 роки тому +69

      SAME!

    • @julietterozier1991
      @julietterozier1991 4 роки тому +117

      how lucky! My bestfriend guy wants us to do 50/50 all the time, even if a earns more than me (and his parents are more wealthy than mine).

    • @lollol-uh5pw
      @lollol-uh5pw 4 роки тому +167

      He even pays when I invited him out! (Yes I did insist him a few times on letting me pay because I invited him but still! If my future man can’t treat me this good then imma just date my bestfriend!)

    • @tiktoktiktok4056
      @tiktoktiktok4056 4 роки тому +38

      My male bestfriend is broke as hell...80% of the times I end up paying for almost everything 😩

    • @tiktoktiktok4056
      @tiktoktiktok4056 4 роки тому +28

      @@julietterozier1991 he's stingy then...mine works but is always complaining about being broke so I mostly have to pay💔

  • @dianaruzage6243
    @dianaruzage6243 4 роки тому +3163

    The classiest I’ve seen is when the man stands up and settles the bill away from you or waits for you to go to the ladies room then settles the bill while you’re gone. This prevents any theatrics when the bill arrives. It’s already settled.

  • @ceilconstante7813
    @ceilconstante7813 4 роки тому +2858

    Just as women should not date while they're working on themselves to level up, a broke man shouldn't "invite" a woman to dinner till he straightens out his finance.

    • @alinan4320
      @alinan4320 4 роки тому +49

      Preach 🙌🙌🙌

    • @nansitey2389
      @nansitey2389 4 роки тому +18

      Exactly!

    • @paradisefound5149
      @paradisefound5149 4 роки тому +60

      You should come to Germany and tell them that. Surprisingly, it's not obvious to everybody 😂😭🤬

    • @zaria5785
      @zaria5785 4 роки тому +6

      Paradise Found cost of living is too much in Germany. That’s why this type of tradition continues there from 60 years ago even.

    • @ceilconstante7813
      @ceilconstante7813 4 роки тому +2

      @F it was a general statement

  • @amandamarie.2624
    @amandamarie.2624 4 роки тому +442

    I remember once going out with a guy (after he asked me) and then at the end of the meal he was like "you got this right?" 😂 i was like no sir. The waitress actually saw what was happening and she walked over and said to me "dont worry girl, I paid your half of the bill, go find yourself a REAL man" 😂 and I did. in the 10 years ive been with my husband ive never paid for a meal. and even when we were first dating he said "dont offer. i know you can pay but im the man, and real men take care of their women."

    • @ennvee1989
      @ennvee1989 4 роки тому +23

      Omg!!😭

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому +97

      That waitress was an angel 😭😭

    • @nickfie86
      @nickfie86 4 роки тому +2

      😮😮😮

    • @babysenpai3883
      @babysenpai3883 4 роки тому +3

      Wow God bless you guys

    • @immortaljellyfish3742
      @immortaljellyfish3742 4 роки тому +27

      What you all dont understand is that taking care of a women is not about the bills. Its SO SO SO much more.
      Paying your bills is a cute and respected move but its still a very small move and a not even worth to mention part of the relationship.

  • @loralove6290
    @loralove6290 4 роки тому +2085

    Had a date with a gentleman, he pulled out my chair, I ordered my appetizer and margarita, we had great conversations, he got me a dozen roses and he paid when the check came. Our server placed it in the middle of the table, I didn't even look at it and began sipping my drink while he grabbed the check. I didn't even look at it sitting on the table and he slid his debit card right in the bill book. I thanked him politely for a great time. Ladies, you gotta learn how to receive, be polite and be feminine.

    • @jonathanrivera366
      @jonathanrivera366 4 роки тому +98

      On a first date it’s whatever I’ll pay the check but if ur expecting that same treatment where u don’t have to pay on dates after that.. you gots to go 🙅🏽‍♂️ .. save it for the simps.

    • @lindsb3541
      @lindsb3541 4 роки тому +123

      My husband payed (in the beginning), and still pays for our dates. I do my part, he does his. But he's always loved to treat. And I treat him back in different ways. It's fair and reciprocal, and yes, he makes significantly more than me - but there is no confusion about the fact that both of us contribute to creating the life we both want.

    • @ilegallaws3741
      @ilegallaws3741 4 роки тому +30

      Question for you...Did you actually dated This guy afterwards?

    • @nihilisticbarbie
      @nihilisticbarbie 4 роки тому +86

      @@jonathanrivera366 Johnathan, please understand that dynamics in relationships are not universal. Some couples like to go halfway and be equal, and there's others where the man prefers to be the one to pay. No one way is right or wrong

    • @addo4164
      @addo4164 4 роки тому +64

      @@nihilisticbarbie I think he was talking about the Woman that expect to be paid for, not the men that want to pay.
      If you want to pay for the dinner, then go for it. But don't expect me to let that happen everytime, I have a job too and would also like to treat my man like he's special.
      A relationship is give and take, but too many woman are comfortable with just taking, and too many men are comfortable with just giving.
      And usually what your left with, is a girl that only cares about his finances and gifts. And a guy that only cares about her body and sex.
      (That's not a relationship, that's prostitution with extra steps.)

  • @yas3450
    @yas3450 4 роки тому +1810

    You wouldn’t invite someone to your house for dinner and expect them to cook the meal, right? I can’t believe our society has lost the most basic of manners!!!

    • @ellapark8770
      @ellapark8770 4 роки тому +34

      So good

    • @ElsieDraco
      @ElsieDraco 4 роки тому +26

      The only exception is a family holiday meal like Thanksgiving where it's likely that everyone will pitch in but that depends on family traditions and there's probably a better way to go about it lol. Otherwise 100% LOVE THIS.

    • @Twyst3d
      @Twyst3d 4 роки тому +43

      Means whoever's invited the person pays right. Not just the man

    • @ruthannemackinnon588
      @ruthannemackinnon588 4 роки тому +11

      I legit stayed in the home of a family member for a weekend by thier invite, who expected us to buy groceries & they didn't even have soap in the guest bathroom 😱

    • @Twyst3d
      @Twyst3d 4 роки тому +13

      @@ruthannemackinnon588 thas a horrible thing to do yo.

  • @elizanovoa
    @elizanovoa 4 роки тому +599

    Most of the times the lady starts a relationship paying 50% of stuff she ends up later paying 100%. It's a bad policy for women.

    • @aliciamoulder
      @aliciamoulder 4 роки тому +40

      Oh my goodness!!! My first boyfriend was like this!! And he always said he didn’t have enough money. I was so clueless that I didn’t get that he was only using my own money for four months :((

    • @TheRubyFeline
      @TheRubyFeline 4 роки тому +11

      Very true!

    • @creeikuko
      @creeikuko 4 роки тому +6

      Most of the time ? 🤣 NEVER!

    • @blessall8856
      @blessall8856 4 роки тому +13

      Excellent advice! Don't let a man try the 50/50 game on you!

    • @klopcodez
      @klopcodez 4 роки тому +9

      As a guy I would never allow any girl that am dating to pay 100%..I mean I pay from time to time if if we pass by to star bucks while in the mall or something..but the case goes the other way if she expected me to pay 100% of the time for her things I would leave..it’s not because of money but the character..no one wants to feel used especially when your dating someone...your either going to marry them or break up with them

  • @Anya0077
    @Anya0077 4 роки тому +582

    Anna's horrified face at the start of the video is adorable 😂❤

    • @andrewchatzidis3924
      @andrewchatzidis3924 3 роки тому

      Oh yes the look of horror that I would have the audacity to put any expectation on her to carry her weight in the relationship oh yes it's so awful smfh

  • @alex47_in_downtown18
    @alex47_in_downtown18 2 роки тому +319

    As a man it's heartwarming to see that there still are women who celebrate their *femininity* & don't consider it something inferior to masculinity...

    • @Tymala1
      @Tymala1 Рік тому +18

      I’ve already spent more money on lingerie, hair, and beauty before the date began anyway

    • @evannasong8356
      @evannasong8356 Рік тому +11

      Oh good there are men who think like this.

    • @seren4740
      @seren4740 Рік тому +8

      Where are masculine men at?

    • @Halgame99
      @Halgame99 Рік тому

      Simp dude thinking his wallet makes him masculine 🤣😂 embarrassing dude shut up man

    • @Halgame99
      @Halgame99 Рік тому +1

      They can celebrate their femininity and pay for their food kid! Just shut up

  • @gigantsquid
    @gigantsquid 4 роки тому +369

    A man once told me he would feel like less of a man if he lets me pay and added “so let’s not even have this conversation, because it’s not something that’s open to ever changing”

    • @gracelim8361
      @gracelim8361 4 роки тому +24

      This warms my heart so much

    • @chantellelovesgreen
      @chantellelovesgreen 4 роки тому +14

      Hot!

    • @idontshiplarryanymoreiship2716
      @idontshiplarryanymoreiship2716 4 роки тому +19

      That's fragile masculinity right there! He should feel loved to pay. Not obligated. Not because he's THE MAN. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Am I the only one that thinks this way?

    • @gigantsquid
      @gigantsquid 4 роки тому +19

      No, there was nothing fragile about that man. We all know that if I would have insisted or even made a scene, I would have paid. There was nothing physically preventing me from that - same as I can carry my own bags etc. But this isn’t about what you can do or what he can do. It’s about respecting one another. It’s about him allowing you to be a lady and you allowing him to be a gentleman. They can’t treat us right if we don’t allow them, you allow your man to pay, to pull out your chair, to help you put on your coat... Allowing men to act like men is an act of power by women.

    • @idontshiplarryanymoreiship2716
      @idontshiplarryanymoreiship2716 4 роки тому +3

      @@gigantsquid nobody need to let anybody do anything lol 😂 whatever you're saying that should be done by men for women, it's all social norms being imposed on people.
      But Being feminine and letting a man treat you like a puppy is not the same.
      Being feminine is a trait that shows power, stands her ground with politeness and elegance.
      All I'm trying to say is, a man must not feel powerful by only doing things for his woman and just paying but the way he takes care of his woman, supports her, stands beside her and if he's the one inviting, he should pay.

  • @myfemalechronicles4244
    @myfemalechronicles4244 4 роки тому +657

    What was sad is how uncomfortable that guy was.

    • @khwahishjoshi8789
      @khwahishjoshi8789 4 роки тому +209

      I thought I was the only one who noticed😂 he was so confused too.
      Such a gentleman..probably wanted to pay and treat her but some women ruin their own lives.

    • @dcastie
      @dcastie 4 роки тому +78

      LOL pure regret on his face

    • @coolcat6341
      @coolcat6341 4 роки тому +94

      I think he was insulted,,,

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому +52

      @@khwahishjoshi8789 they ruin it for the next girl too🙄

    • @mightyobserver12
      @mightyobserver12 4 роки тому +60

      He was a little insulted.
      Only few now who still practice chivalry.

  • @sambakir6832
    @sambakir6832 4 роки тому +284

    Yes ladies no need to kiss his feet its just food 😂😂..have some respect for yourself ladies

    • @janejones3847
      @janejones3847 4 роки тому +3

      Yea like who wud want to kizz yo feet

    • @raindrop6041
      @raindrop6041 4 роки тому +1

      😄😄😄

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +3

      If you expect free food... stay away from me.

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +2

      Islam is right about woman like @sarah hassam

    • @Amy_omer
      @Amy_omer 4 роки тому +15

      @@selfaware3940 in Islam man is responsible for his wife and HE PAYS FOR EVERYTHING AND SHE DOESNT EVEN IF SHE IS RICH so yeah thanks God our men doesnt have your mentality of 50/50 🙄

  • @orionstar6268
    @orionstar6268 4 роки тому +581

    My Spanish great grandmother had a saying in Spanish...."El que quiere azul celeste...que le cueste".... translated to English that sort of goes like this ..."The one who wants baby blues, must pay the dues" ...or something of the sort. I remember once when I was about 24 year old...a man invited me out and when we finished our meal he made a comment trying to indirectly suggest that women should cooperate for the bill.... I just smile and said to him.... Ohhhh , I know what you mean...then I asked him, still with a smile on my face...do you know why I never acquired the vices of smoking and drinking? Because when I was very young the allowance my parents gave me was not enough to buy cigarets and alcohol...my mother said to me....if you can not afford to pay for your vices, then you don't need to have vices. 🤣 Men who can't afford to have a woman...don't need one.

    • @jutube90
      @jutube90 4 роки тому +35

      😂 If a man cannot afford a woman, you talk about women like they were commodity

    • @nishobit.1293
      @nishobit.1293 4 роки тому +36

      Great story. You are right right. Men who can't afford to court a woman should just jerk off to porn for the rest of their lives.

    • @muktasp30
      @muktasp30 3 роки тому +6

      Wow girl! 🤣

    • @hmln3419
      @hmln3419 3 роки тому +24

      @@jutube90 I mean 95 % of the times they treat us like that. They only respect us and talk about feminism when the bill comes and when it is time to go to work

    • @jasonpopp2026
      @jasonpopp2026 3 роки тому +6

      Your spanish great grandmother is delusional.

  • @OlgaPogozheva
    @OlgaPogozheva 4 роки тому +211

    If I am expected to pay on a first date, it's the last date as well. If this is a business meeting, or a meeting with a friend, then it's a different story. But if a man invites me to a dinner and expects me to pay, he'll fall into this business/friends category immediately, and I wouldn't consider him as a match anymore. If a man can't take care of a woman at such an early stage, what will become of him when the romance wears away? A big no-no here. Even though when I dated with my future husband, we were both young and he was only 17 years old, it was him who paid the bills. It was after several months that I suggested that we share our budgets - but it was after the "dating" stage. At that time, I knew it's the man I'm going to spend my life with, and since I'm better at financial planning, I was the one who did that. But if you're both adult and older than 17 y.o.? It's out of question, as it's an entirely different situation. I still think I did some mistakes, in terms of expectations, but when I gew older, I changed my approach. Always find ways for impovement.

    • @khwahishjoshi8789
      @khwahishjoshi8789 4 роки тому +11

      Wow Olga ! You are so lucky , I hope you realise it . There's plenty of people here in the comments who have experienced such stupid experiences that it angers me.Your story is beautiful!
      I am only 16..never dated but that truly made my expectations so high!

    • @elegantlady1789
      @elegantlady1789 4 роки тому +12

      Girl, I don’t even bring a purse, I come empty handed!

    • @wolfpack3709
      @wolfpack3709 4 роки тому +11

      Im 15 and my expectations are high already because of these types of videos

    • @OlgaPogozheva
      @OlgaPogozheva 4 роки тому +11

      @@khwahishjoshi8789 ​ never lower them down! I had my expectations (as to personal qualities of my future man: kindness, honesty, love, me being his #1 priority etc) since the age of... dont know, 7? Since forever. So I looked the right way when choosing a person for life. I was 16 at the time, and we're 16 years together now. I wouldn't mind if my future man was wealthier, too, but at 16, I didn't think much about money. You know better now, thanks to these types of videos ) but I would still base my choice on the high PERSONAL qualities and standards.

    • @OlgaPogozheva
      @OlgaPogozheva 4 роки тому +5

      @@elegantlady1789 that's a smart way to do it :))) but just in case you'll need to come back on your own? For a taxi? But yep, never show your purse to a man!

  • @schnioula
    @schnioula 4 роки тому +623

    Women like this are the reason I have a hard time finding a decent man! Cheap and easy! Smh! 🤦🏻‍♀️

    • @FarihaIslam-ji4kx
      @FarihaIslam-ji4kx 4 роки тому +71

      true. my whole friend group is somehow in the other category.
      I was judged because I told them I didn't offer to pay after a date. its sad

    • @schnioula
      @schnioula 4 роки тому +92

      Promi Lee All we can do is working on ourselves, but imagine all women had enough self-respect and decency: Men would treat us all like queens! Instead, they get free meals and sex the first night!

    • @jacpppp
      @jacpppp 4 роки тому +106

      Its so annoying! These men get free sex free dates free everything. Then we get abused for wanting traditional men!

    • @MT-hk9cp
      @MT-hk9cp 4 роки тому +44

      @@FarihaIslam-ji4kx Please expand your friend circle because it will limit you in the future constantly being around those negative influences. She has a video about 10 types of friends you should avoid.

    • @FarihaIslam-ji4kx
      @FarihaIslam-ji4kx 4 роки тому +10

      @@MT-hk9cp thank you. I watched that video and just realized they fell in all the categories smh :)
      but I dont really know how to change that.

  • @Maya-ei5uk
    @Maya-ei5uk 4 роки тому +1511

    It’s incredulous that someone would invite another out, yet expect them to pay. Terrible. Especially when a man invites a woman out! I’m so glad you do videos like this because people need help. They really do. Including me sometimes! Lol. Thank you!!!

    • @erinahosk
      @erinahosk 4 роки тому +12

      exactly, honey!

    • @dorismwendwa3249
      @dorismwendwa3249 4 роки тому +22

      💯
      The audacity!!😑😑

    • @eveomoregbe519
      @eveomoregbe519 4 роки тому +24

      so if a woman invites a guy out on the date should she pay?? I’m just asking because I’m trying to understand the etiquette rule shown at 1:43

    • @joshbrescia4139
      @joshbrescia4139 4 роки тому +44

      @@eveomoregbe519 In my opinion It depends if he is your close friend it's ok to pay for his bill on a rare occasion but if you just met him for the first time Don't. But why would a woman ask a man for a date it supposed to be the Man will initiate first not the Woman

    • @ellierc6710
      @ellierc6710 4 роки тому +44

      But feminism! ...Ugh. My issue is this - men absolutely should pay because we’re doing all the rest of the work especially in the bedroom. Very few men care to learn how to please a woman so yea, you’re buying my dinner jerk!

  • @flutenanyidk1806
    @flutenanyidk1806 4 роки тому +348

    My friend bought us (two of my gal friends and I) pizza and I felt guilty because he was paying for me. I expressed this to him and he proudly proclaimed, "oh, don't worry about it! In my family the man is always expected to provide! That's just my role! I'm providing for you three!"
    I immediately had a lot more respect for him.

    • @lotuswolf1518
      @lotuswolf1518 3 роки тому +12

      Same , I like men who splurge money

    • @chri371
      @chri371 3 роки тому +6

      You live in middle ages. So if u believe that man’s role is provider for the woman (so wtf is she? A child) what is the woman’s role? Staying al home and not work i suppose. You are the death of the femmismism

    • @ikmalaxl5286
      @ikmalaxl5286 2 роки тому

      Wh ore

    • @Nguyen12121
      @Nguyen12121 2 роки тому

      Next time, invite the all your girlfriends along when he "invites you" out.

    • @tyarayachel7041
      @tyarayachel7041 2 роки тому +4

      @@chri371 First of all you have a very reduccionist point about history. Then, man being the provider doesn't mean that women should not work, nor be independent and gain much more than them. And feminism now days is more in favor for men than for women. Women we have a lot of things but stills femininists add that you have to pay.

  • @victoriapalferez-siri5952
    @victoriapalferez-siri5952 4 роки тому +312

    A woman never pays in a date unless she invites the man or is a business meeting to avoid embarrassment. That is crazy...a broke man shouldn't date that shows a lifetime of struggles and financial abuse from him.

    • @marijanailjic1790
      @marijanailjic1790 4 роки тому +33

      Broke man shouldn't date? If you are in a relationship with a man, and especially when we are young, you can't expect for example 22 year old to always be on top of his money game. Not speaking about someone using you, but if he from time to time struggles with money, what's wrong with jumping in and splitting the bill? It's ridiculous to have money as only and highest priority on your dating list. As a couple sometimes we have more, sometimes less money. If he is trying and works hard for his money, what are we saying? Oh okay that's fine from you, but you know you have to be perfect all the time, don't even think about quitting your job even if it makes you miserable as long as it makes good bank? Just so you don't end up struggling for a bit? I know my boyfriend would never sit at home doing nothing and let everything fall on me financially, but if he goes through hard times with money, I will surely jump in and share bills.

    • @shadowsun5704
      @shadowsun5704 4 роки тому +69

      Marijana Iljic would you invite someone over to your house for dinner when you have no food? Would you offer a friend a ride to work when you don’t have a car? If you are of low means then you have to Compensate with effort. Buy groceries and have a wonderful picnic in the park to show of your culinary skills. If you have no means and no skills... then what are you doing dating?

    • @rainevinyaya756
      @rainevinyaya756 4 роки тому +22

      Marijana Iljic I completely agree with you! My first bf was a very sweet man who paid for everything. Then his parents had a horrible break-up and basically none of them wanted him. So at 18 years old he was at university and had to work a crappy job in the evenings just to get by. Of course, during that time I didn‘t expect any expensive gifts from him and I supported him because it wasn‘t his fault. It‘s now many years later, he has a great job and a sweet wife. So I agree that during tough times you should definitely support your man. They might be suffering enough, how are they going to feel if you turn your back in them on top of everything else just because they having money problems at the moment that they might not even be responsable for.

    • @marijanailjic1790
      @marijanailjic1790 4 роки тому +3

      @@shadowsun5704 i am not sure i am following, so it's obligatory for man to provide 100% in a relationship for everything all the time? Without exception?

    • @1maybeline
      @1maybeline 4 роки тому +30

      I think there is a difference in dating during your teens and 25 y/o. Younger guys are usually preparing themselves financially and since they usually have limited assets, they should probably invite a girl to an appropriate date that they can pay on their own, like a picnic, homemade/takeout lunch at a park etc. But to ask a woman on a date to a meal he can't afford and then require for her to pay is completely ridiculous. It deceives the purpose of trying to romance a woman. The worst part is when you see grown men, doing this.

  • @heidiaguilar1257
    @heidiaguilar1257 4 роки тому +208

    I have never paid for a date, ever. Of all the men I have dated and even my husband, I have never paid for dinner, movie, etc. I did the rules and have been happily married for 21 years. Oh, yes, he still pays.

    • @Cami-ls1ki
      @Cami-ls1ki 4 роки тому +20

      Where do you find men like this, asking for a friend :(

    • @sumigarcia1059
      @sumigarcia1059 4 роки тому +5

      You got the jackpot

    • @theaville8007
      @theaville8007 4 роки тому

      Which rules?

    • @ESCSvideos
      @ESCSvideos 4 роки тому

      That is not a Man you are with, it's a NEW FOOL!..........He has probably Cheated on you something silly and Pays all the bills to keep you Quiet!........Just look at David Beckham, Wayne Rooney, I wonder why despite obvious cheating evidence their wives have not left these MultiMillionaires!?? 🤔🤔🤔

    • @kchancellor9010
      @kchancellor9010 4 роки тому +7

      ESCSvideos Maybe she just has a nice guy that’s faithful. It happens.
      And good for her .

  • @ccverdera6298
    @ccverdera6298 4 роки тому +88

    I used to try to pay for myself when I was younger. Then I actually had a job where I was passed over for a raise and when I asked my boss why (she was a woman!) she said she chose to give a raise to my male coworker because he has to pay on dates. True story! If I'm getting paid less at work because of my gender then I don't really want to go 50/50.

    • @lilidubois6470
      @lilidubois6470 4 роки тому +8

      And you have to pay for bras, tampons, pads, birth control and gynecological appointments.

    • @elizabethenu-akan502
      @elizabethenu-akan502 4 роки тому +1

      Wooow... I'm in shock rn...

    • @paltaboro1278
      @paltaboro1278 2 місяці тому

      Sorry to hear that!.

  • @joliejolie6201
    @joliejolie6201 4 роки тому +367

    If a man can't even treat you to a meal...I am sorry that man is not worth your time and effort. Men who love you and care will give you the world...I know because I married one. I can afford my own things but he won't allow me to pay for anything.

    • @siim605
      @siim605 4 роки тому +44

      I absolutely agree in the polar opposite direction. If a woman feels entitled enough that I have to pay for them just because they're a woman, they are not worth my time and effort.

    • @siim605
      @siim605 4 роки тому +1

      @Chlarie Peace That's anecdotal.

    • @sukanyaa.sonowal
      @sukanyaa.sonowal 3 роки тому +26

      I might be wrong but I don't find anything wrong in women paying. I'm in a relationship for more than 5 years & it was me who payed on our first date. He wanted to pay but it was me who didn't let him. We want to be treated equally like men, so I think it will be hypocrisy if that criteria doesn't apply to this as well. And speaking about our biological capabilities as Anna mentioned, it's no fault of men. We are made that way. So I guess that's kind of absurd comparing that with paying our bills.

    • @voguehaven5154
      @voguehaven5154 3 роки тому +10

      @@sukanyaa.sonowal Thank God there are only a few women who allow this non-sense. Make sure you buy him flowers and chocolates as well.

    • @siim605
      @siim605 3 роки тому +10

      @@voguehaven5154 No, people date people they're initially infatuated with. That's not the same as liking someone as a person, because before a first date, you don't really KNOW your date as a person. Kindness and respect? Of course! That doesn't involve money at all. So, explain to me why a man has to "treat" a woman (with money). To impress them? Come on. I'd rather not be with a person who wants to be impressed by money. That's shallow to the highest degree.

  • @1stMilcom
    @1stMilcom 4 роки тому +296

    Proven power move for any young men reading: When ordering food with waiter present, tell your date that she should order anything she likes, you will take care of everything. Then later on, take care of the bill out of her sight. Just walk out of the restaurant with her like a boss.

    • @eamami1087
      @eamami1087 4 роки тому +8

      👏👏

    • @ew7908
      @ew7908 4 роки тому +16

      Lol yes! But they must also be able to comfortably pay for everything as well! (So he better mean it!) 😉

    • @frankharris3380
      @frankharris3380 4 роки тому +10

      Yes, it's what I do.

    • @atomicplaygirl66
      @atomicplaygirl66 4 роки тому +20

      I once went on a 1st date with a man who was a world traveler. He asked me to pick any restaurant. I told him I enjoy trying new things but had never tried Indian cuisine. So he picked out a place he knew was special, and after I told him my preferences/likes/dislikes he actually ordered for me. Just like in the movies. "The lady will be having...." I was so impressed. I never even saw the bill. He was a true gentleman.

    • @atomicplaygirl66
      @atomicplaygirl66 4 роки тому

      💯

  • @aesthete7227
    @aesthete7227 4 роки тому +74

    *OMG THIS IS THE EARLIEST I HAVE BEEN WHERE YOU AT EARLY SQUAD?*

  • @Lili.H
    @Lili.H 4 роки тому +76

    My absolute worst first date experience was not only he was 10 mins late, but He was so cheap that he waited for me to came back from the bathroom , as the waitress already half way took the billed after he placed his credit card , and he had to called the waitress back and told me that I should split the $13 bills with him. Now I looked back , it was dumb but I am glad I had that experience. Then I met my boyfriend later on which we been friends for two years prior to our two years dating. He remembered things that I mentioned that I would love to do, so on our first date, he surprised me and booked us to the penguins encounter experience at the aquarium, and finish the night with a romantic Italian dinner which he claimed he make the reservation a few days prior since he was nervous he wouldn’t get the table. Till this day , he still treated me like a queen. My point is: sometimes you gotta meet some frogs till you meet the prince that will treat you the way that you deserve. Never settle for less! ❤️

    • @magdalenahabibibabadi6460
      @magdalenahabibibabadi6460 2 роки тому +4

      It could be worse, I heard a story about guy who invited a girl for a coffee, she didn't want to go on a second date, so he sent her a Venmo request for 3,50€

    • @SHINCHAN-hn4cw
      @SHINCHAN-hn4cw 11 місяців тому +2

      You were broke

    • @Lili.H
      @Lili.H 11 місяців тому

      @@SHINCHAN-hn4cw I have no problem treating my friends for a $100 per person meal, but there’s something call the principal. Again, different stroke for different folk.

    • @caterine4604
      @caterine4604 11 місяців тому +1

      I literally had this experience yesterday/ Thank you so much for sharing

    • @natalievancouver8188
      @natalievancouver8188 7 місяців тому +1

      Wow he wanted to split $13?! Very cheap I would have just paid the whole $13 plus tip and left! Especially on a first date! Not worth the hassle and if he’s worried about $13 he’s definitely got money hang ups he should’ve discussed beforehand not when the bill arrived. If it were $50-100+ that would’ve been way different especially if I ordered lots of expensive items and he ate a hamburger and water!

  • @lightuponlight6024
    @lightuponlight6024 4 роки тому +109

    Ladies it’s a big sign how the relations are going to continue with such individuals if you allow them to pay the bill. For the rest of your life you would be paying. You don’t buy a man. You don’t owe a man who invites you to pay the bill or sleep with him. You owe it to yourself to express thankfulness without guilt!

    • @SG-gw5xo
      @SG-gw5xo 4 роки тому +3

      Preach!

    • @marte1376
      @marte1376 4 роки тому

      I totally agree with you. But now man are saying the same, that they don't buy the girl they want and we as woman shouldn't allow it. And I'm so conflicted, because I know my worth and men have to invest time, money and their presence. But with this thing of equality, radical feminism is getting really confused. My dad always tells me that women of today want the benefits of feminism and patriarchal system, and that's contradictory 🙄

    • @divinbebelakashala2773
      @divinbebelakashala2773 4 роки тому

      @@marte1376 Isn't your father right? It was previously impossible for a woman to pay for a date( she was stuck at home and couldn't go to school). Now, women earn a lot(higher earnings than men for people under 30). The point of paying is gone. People want both systems benefits. Either you go full patriarchy or full feminism there isn't a middle ground.

    • @WellBeing999
      @WellBeing999 4 роки тому

      Divin bebela kashala Feminism gave women a choice. So no it’s not either or like you say. If I want to be taken care of I can find a man that’s more traditional. If you’re a woman that wants to prove she’s equal to a man (I don’t because I’m not a man in any respect) then let her prove herself. Before feminism women never had the choice to be independent. Now they do since they don’t need a man to live their life. I say the smart woman takes full advantage and makes her own money while allowing a man the space to be a man. Some women think you can’t have both for some reason. You can even work from home as a stay at home mom doing UA-cam or other online business to have income. Save what you make for a rainy day and the man provides. Simple. And yes it’s possible because there are many women on UA-cam doing just that. Think outside of the box.

    • @divinbebelakashala2773
      @divinbebelakashala2773 4 роки тому

      @@WellBeing999 It's not just women that have a choice, men also have the choice. The previous system prevented women from working, but it also forced men to pay for women. Now, that women work (and even outearn men for people under 30), men will of course step out of their previous duties. You can still look for a traditional man, aka a man that pays for you, but I can promise you that they will become scarcer and scarcer, because they will also wonder :"Why pay to be with her, when the other will pay her share to be with me." Both side will want a better deal and eventually compromise, thus the rise of 50-50 relationships. This is a well-known sociological phenomenon: in a binary social situation, you can't change the condition of one side without modifying the other side condition.

  • @sarrabenibrahim6815
    @sarrabenibrahim6815 4 роки тому +713

    Believe me Ladies a man who has money but still stingy is 10 times worse than an average Joe ..

    • @white2925
      @white2925 4 роки тому +51

      Yes, those are the dusties with a tie .... Ladies be careful at those ones, they are the worst!

    • @gorzkawodka
      @gorzkawodka 4 роки тому +4

      Yeeesssss!!!

    • @Carmy0118
      @Carmy0118 3 роки тому +4

      Totally

    • @kitoakovacs1479
      @kitoakovacs1479 3 роки тому +23

      Duh sometimes he has an average income and goes out of his way to provide u what u need

    • @bklyn2014
      @bklyn2014 3 роки тому +11

      SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE LADIES IN THE BACK!!!

  • @OlgaPogozheva
    @OlgaPogozheva 4 роки тому +504

    I agree with Anna here: we CAN educate men by OUR own behaviour. A real man would not do anything that a real woman would not allow him to.

    • @PureeCharm
      @PureeCharm 4 роки тому +7

      @@j.t.8816 How do you give off that aura of "im not taking bs" ? im trying to cultivate that so people dont test me

    • @tiffany_adventures_2659
      @tiffany_adventures_2659 4 роки тому +1

      Amen and well said

    • @SG-gw5xo
      @SG-gw5xo 4 роки тому +1

      Exactly

    • @fearless6947
      @fearless6947 4 роки тому +6

      @You stole my burrito, Charlie Exactly. They either treat a girl well or they won't. This channel isn't about educatiing men. It's about screening and finding the right man. If they show signs of not wanting to spend money, that's a red flag. It means move on and date someone else, if not, in the end, you end up both unhappy.

    • @fearless6947
      @fearless6947 4 роки тому +2

      @@PureeCharm you can buy a book about boundaries or there are some youtube channels on that topic.

  • @vanessavanessa9381
    @vanessavanessa9381 4 роки тому +309

    Anna, thank you for not being intimidated to talk on affluent dating. Women in the Western world are so brainwashed by the system to be "equal" because the budget of the state is not profiting from a maintained woman not working and not paying taxes. There is nothing wrong in being provided by a man. IT IS NORMAL. Wish you could speak more on the topic of relationship. Love and gratitude 💖

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +11

      Vanessa, you said
      " Women in the Western world are so brainwashed by the system to be "equal" because the budget of the state is not profiting from a maintained woman not working and not paying taxes. There is nothing wrong in being provided by a man. IT IS NORMAL. "
      Well since you now demand equality in the work place, the right to vote and demand an end to slut-shaming... then you can pay your own way and that's IS NORMAL. Paying for 50% of the bill does not mean that your paying for me, only that your paying for what you shove down your gullet.

    • @orionstar6268
      @orionstar6268 4 роки тому +13

      I think somewhere along the line women got confused by the idea that been EQUAL means to been THE SAME...

    • @siim605
      @siim605 4 роки тому +5

      You want to have your cake and eat it too. I see.

    • @chrisr5649
      @chrisr5649 3 роки тому +9

      There’s nothing wrong in being maintained, but you also know that this is outdated thinking right? You also become more vulnerable given that a woman in your position is not financially independent.

    • @andrewchatzidis3924
      @andrewchatzidis3924 3 роки тому +9

      It becomes an issue when u expect us to provide for u and u don't bring anything in return

  • @dominiquejones6758
    @dominiquejones6758 4 роки тому +534

    Omg I can’t believe men like this exist. My man pays for everything.

    • @AmeliePlays
      @AmeliePlays 4 роки тому +30

      Dominique Jones same with my fiancé, he always pays for food too doesn’t matter if it’s groceries or dining out 💕 you look gorgeous btw 💓

    • @selenacasper5691
      @selenacasper5691 4 роки тому +15

      Lucky lady...

    • @NatalyF17
      @NatalyF17 4 роки тому +11

      Yes! Mine too. Like a true gentleman

    • @Melanie-le6mw
      @Melanie-le6mw 4 роки тому +8

      As he should. You look great! 🙌🏾

    • @veronicagmail8654
      @veronicagmail8654 4 роки тому +10

      Absolutely, it’s crazy that some men expect for the woman to pay. I won’t date that men again !

  • @nansitey2389
    @nansitey2389 4 роки тому +20

    THANK YOU for this important message! So powerfully and eloquently put. I was recently invited out for a third date by a 50-year-old Greek man who told me it would be my treat this time! The nerve! I told him I was not desperate, a MAN always pays for his lady, too bad he wasn’t financially able to do so and then I blocked him. I have never and will never pay for anything for a man. That’s how my father raised me.

  • @lousunny5682
    @lousunny5682 4 роки тому +47

    I absolutely agree with you Anna. Do not waste your time on 50/50 or dustys if you’re looking for a masculine man.

    • @blessall8856
      @blessall8856 4 роки тому +1

      Totally agree. If he starts the 50/50 game, it will later be 100%!!

    • @21FreshD
      @21FreshD 4 роки тому

      @Kitty so much bullshit in one text, respect. U are assuming so much from a person who wrote one sentence. How about a logical argument? Why is it ok to hang on a tradition that the man has to pay but traditions like the woman stays home is sexist or whatever? Sounds Like Double standard.
      Hope there will be a discussion based in arguments

  • @sidratulmoontaha3959
    @sidratulmoontaha3959 3 роки тому +509

    This woman literally changed my whole life 🙂 literally.... Endless respect for you dear Anna 😍

    • @veronica7907
      @veronica7907 3 роки тому +14

      Me too Anna, before I watched your channel I was super naive even though my mother always tell me , man should pay, but never explained me fully why, as you do! Since that, I have educated some men 😂 and also have shared this knowledge with my girlfriends. Please never stop! Your voice should be hear louder!! Plis go to tik tok , younger generations need to hear you!!

    • @tradetravelxplore
      @tradetravelxplore 3 роки тому +7

      U will be alone men don't want that

    • @MJ-sj5dv
      @MJ-sj5dv 3 роки тому +7

      Me too, I used to be such a pick me, all my life most the men I was with used me and just overall didn't respect me

    • @Tojoj22
      @Tojoj22 3 роки тому +3

      Yes!! ❤️

    • @princesssupernova5300
      @princesssupernova5300 3 роки тому +2

      @@namjoonsgf41cultured men✨✨✨

  • @Nofretari
    @Nofretari 4 роки тому +378

    I would rather stay single then pay.

    • @lucienneferbona4567
      @lucienneferbona4567 4 роки тому +12

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm crying....

    • @lucienneferbona4567
      @lucienneferbona4567 4 роки тому +10

      Same🙋

    • @orangecookielee6412
      @orangecookielee6412 4 роки тому +21

      Nofretari Many times going out with men is just a waste of time. Time = money in labor calculation 🧮 , why do I even want to throw extra money in?! Definitely staying single!

    • @piotrgwozdz4082
      @piotrgwozdz4082 4 роки тому +10

      I hope u will :)

    • @Kelly-Lina_007.
      @Kelly-Lina_007. 4 роки тому +1

      🤣🤣🤣🤣😂

  • @Gloria-ke1md
    @Gloria-ke1md 4 роки тому +76

    I haven't even watched the video yet bt I'm gonna say .... You my fellow women are beautiful goddesses, u deserve a man who pays the bill at the end of the date , pulls the chair for you, open the door for you , bend his knee and give you roses , buy you cute stuff every now and then 💜

  • @That-Wanderer
    @That-Wanderer 4 роки тому +253

    We have allowed men to get way too lazy, STOP IT

    • @21FreshD
      @21FreshD 4 роки тому +4

      @Rugved Risbud Just waiting for a reply on your comment. No one could give a logical argument in your point so far.

    • @21FreshD
      @21FreshD 4 роки тому +2

      @Scarlet Rose yeah u dont want to have sex at all. Just something u give to guys. Thats bullshit. But u mean guys should pay u for sex? I know another word for that

    • @orionstar6268
      @orionstar6268 4 роки тому +2

      YES, IT IS OUR FAULT as mothers.... because we made them that way....when I was 16 me and a girl fiend of mine took the subway while we were carrying things in our hands....all sits were taken (many by young men like us) ..and my 'FEMINIST" friend turn to me and said...There are no more gentleman in this world... and one of them answer...yes there are...the problem is that there are not enough sits.

    • @addo4164
      @addo4164 4 роки тому +2

      @@orionstar6268 When we start treating everyone as equal, that throws out all elements of chivalry aimed at woman. And instead results in a general politeness to everyone.
      Wether you have tits or a dick, you shouldn't expect a seat unless you actually need one (disability, pregnancy, elder, etc). This applies to everything in the real world, otherwise we are not really equal.

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +1

      @Kitty If you demand that men have to pay all your bills then you either live in the 1950's or a trailer park.

  • @andreaperez5434
    @andreaperez5434 4 роки тому +142

    It explains why I AM alone 😭😭😭😭😭 I always paid bills. Do not make My mistake 👊

    • @It.is.snehal
      @It.is.snehal 3 роки тому +21

      I literally did the same and I took the pride in that. I was wrong and was terribly taken advantage of

    • @akasickform
      @akasickform 3 роки тому +3

      Welcome to equality

    • @It.is.snehal
      @It.is.snehal 3 роки тому +8

      @@akasickform no need, let the man pay the bill. Period

    • @carmencaldera5834
      @carmencaldera5834 3 роки тому +7

      Don't do anymore....

    • @hanma7966
      @hanma7966 3 роки тому +3

      @@It.is.snehal no. Lol

  • @SOHALEE91
    @SOHALEE91 4 роки тому +17

    In our first date, when we said goodbye, I said It's too late now I think I need a taxi. Then he replied, yes please book a taxi. And he did nothing, just say and nothing. Now, I feel luckly that that relatiobship went finish. Thanks God.

  • @patrepeels3212
    @patrepeels3212 4 роки тому +273

    Why is this even being discussed. I mean woman actually get uncomfortable with this...of course you dont pay..im 60 yrs. old and ive NEVER paid for a meal or ANYTHING in my entire life. Im a woman and i font have to

    • @sumigarcia1059
      @sumigarcia1059 4 роки тому +48

      The younger generation is evolving into a disgusting mindset.

    • @huehuehie4975
      @huehuehie4975 4 роки тому +20

      The older generation women didn't compete for men for the role of provider. From 1960s and onwards, women entered in great numbers ruining the relationship of the provider and nurturer. I feel men are growing resentful and not dating because how can you date your competition?

    • @kimberlyyetta2332
      @kimberlyyetta2332 4 роки тому +22

      It's a different generation. Our men are spoiled, unfortunately.

    • @patrepeels3212
      @patrepeels3212 4 роки тому +3

      Educate tour man while dating then when you marry he will continue to behave exactly how you trained him...I am married to a trustworthy educated wealthy man and never worked a day in my life and i just couldn't even fathom it any other way

    • @dia.8988
      @dia.8988 4 роки тому +2

      Thanks for sharing Pat! I enjoy reading comments from wiser women.

  • @faechan92
    @faechan92 4 роки тому +339

    If a guy asks to split the bill a good response is to act embarrassed and say "Oh, I'm sorry! I thought this was a date..."
    If he still insists on spliting the bill its time to ghost that beta.

    • @Amy_Nicole_Sabas
      @Amy_Nicole_Sabas 4 роки тому +50

      That is perfect. I'm going to remember that one for the future!

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому +6

      Wow! Thanks for this tip!❤

    • @quyenta2629
      @quyenta2629 4 роки тому +41

      From a man’s point of view, my father once told me. “When you go out with a man on a date, let’s him pay, it’s the man’s job. If he does not pay, forget it.”

    • @rachelmcclain5367
      @rachelmcclain5367 4 роки тому +2

      At least betas can be nice on occasion
      This dudes more of an omega

    • @IndianPrince04
      @IndianPrince04 4 роки тому +14

      Plot twist: betas are the ones who pay. High value men are dating multiple hotties without ever spending a penny.

  • @cjsrescues
    @cjsrescues 2 роки тому +102

    I was on a date a few years back and the male, after the meal was finished, suddenly remembered he "forgot" his wallet. I then asked the waiter to split the bill, I paid my part and left. I NEVER spoke to him again.

    • @teamebrhane7222
      @teamebrhane7222 2 роки тому +5

      "Male"ahahaha

    • @teamebrhane7222
      @teamebrhane7222 2 роки тому +4

      Wtf yall forget your wallet so many times

    • @cjsrescues
      @cjsrescues 2 роки тому +36

      @EL JAY I found out right before the date, he had done that to a couple of other women. So no, I was the one who doged a bullet on that loser. I was prepared to pay my half, but after the information I found out. I played his game.

    • @Anonymous-gw4tm
      @Anonymous-gw4tm 2 роки тому +14

      @@cjsrescues what a power move girl!! Good for u 💁‍♀️

    • @allthingsbeauty9175
      @allthingsbeauty9175 2 роки тому +5

      Haha good for you!!! I would do the exact same thing 😂

  • @livio8
    @livio8 4 роки тому +181

    I really do hope that in the year: 2020; elegant ladies aren't still confused and know who is to pay on a date.

    • @Twyst3d
      @Twyst3d 4 роки тому +5

      Split the damn bill sexist

    • @hmln3419
      @hmln3419 4 роки тому +5

      @@eatthis6227 believe me I thought like this but later on man stop respecting you and feeling like he needs to do anything for you because you can do it alone and it starts 50:50 but it ends with you paying everything and he doing nothing

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому

      "elegant ladies" have been extinct since the 1960s. Honestly, I think that there should be equality. eg. why are women allowed to vote on matters like going to war when they are excluded from the draft?

    • @name-eo1lv
      @name-eo1lv 4 роки тому +3

      Self Aware as a woman i can agree with that, women just want a free pass in life because they just so happen to have a vagina. like, it’s not fair

    • @IndianPrince04
      @IndianPrince04 4 роки тому +5

      Hmm is "elegant ladies" doublespeak for lazy broke females who are too poor af to buy their own meal? Are these "elegant ladies" able to wipe their ass without a man's assistance?

  • @twixie__5651
    @twixie__5651 4 роки тому +55

    I have went out with some men when I was a uni student and they usually expect the woman to pay. They are all about equality and got used to women paying half. They think that’s normal and that’s how it is supposed to be. Other women also like to pay and help the man with expenses, I think it’s because they think the guy will be more appreciative. The reason of some men also is that they’re not gonna spend much on a lady because they think they’re still getting to know each other and are scared in the end they might get rejected or used. I did notice they want the lady to pay always and half the bill but they want company and relationship. Ugh.. men like those shouldn’t even start a relationship because they cannot even fix their own woes.
    I did go out with some high class men and they were totally different from those guys. I am a Doctor now. They will really make you feel like a lady. I did try to offer to pay the bill for politeness and usually when I meet a guy, I do not assume he is going to be my bf. He can be a friend too so I offer. My dad has always told me to offer to pay so the guy won’t look down on you or blame you when things don’t work out. He cannot say,”I spent much on you. You led me on and you don’t like me in the end.” But whenever I do try to pay for first meeting, these highclass men usually say it’s on them and I just smile and say thank you.
    Now, I have a bf who I don’t have a problem with because he knows how to treat me well. Classy and educated.

    • @laourat8377
      @laourat8377 4 роки тому

      @@bogdi7578 I think you should make it clear that you will not accept this behaviour for him. If he changes, good. If not, ask yourself whether you really want to be with someone who doesn't take care of you financially. Of course if he has money problems then that's a whole other issue.

  • @francinegray9383
    @francinegray9383 4 роки тому +66

    The men I dated throughout my life, and including my husband, would be insulted if I reached for my wallet.

    • @miroslavamarkovic1872
      @miroslavamarkovic1872 4 роки тому +5

      Lucky you

    • @sreyas3144
      @sreyas3144 3 роки тому +2

      They must be reasonably rich that's why

    • @henoovyourslavangi8518
      @henoovyourslavangi8518 3 роки тому +11

      @@sreyas3144 um, no, they are just real men. I've dated the poorest of the poor, and men always pay. Its protocol, it's the social contract that men pay. Millennials have tried to change this protocol, and it makes women look desperate, while they are out on a date paying for his dinner. How appalling.

    • @sreyas3144
      @sreyas3144 3 роки тому +1

      @@henoovyourslavangi8518 usually men pay in previous times is beacause ladies doesn't have job ,now in this recent period women are earning even more than men I think at least on the first date she should split , that's more reasonable don't you think so

    • @RRC879
      @RRC879 3 роки тому

      Honest question : Where do you get such men ? I am surrounded by man childs.

  • @Lolabelle59
    @Lolabelle59 2 роки тому +13

    I appreciate your attitude (especially laughing) towards this and appreciate that you made this video. I am older (62), and in my day men asked women out, opened doors, and paid. Period.

  • @MsNella
    @MsNella 4 роки тому +20

    Thank you so much for the education. I am emerging from this lockdown a more confident woman. A man recently asked me out to meet in the park for a date. I asked him if he would pack a picnic as I would have just come straight from work. He told me that he does not know why he should bring me food. The date never happened and I have wished him all the best in his future endeavours 🤣

    • @1maybeline
      @1maybeline 4 роки тому +8

      I guess he never learned that it's easier to romance a woman when her stomach is full not when she's hungry and only thinking about food.
      You did good at pushing him to the curb!

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому +4

      Wow! You go girl! 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾❤

  • @michelletan8493
    @michelletan8493 4 роки тому +1948

    When its time to pay, my husband used to excused himself and goes directly to the cashier and pay. The bill never arrived at out table.

    • @Red_1976
      @Red_1976 4 роки тому +192

      Total gentleman! You lucky woman!

    • @AA-zq1sx
      @AA-zq1sx 4 роки тому +130

      And that's why he's your husband today! ^_^

    • @HUMEN5479
      @HUMEN5479 4 роки тому +33

      You so lucky ❤

    • @-lavender-777
      @-lavender-777 4 роки тому +22

      Amazing

    • @vphoenix5278
      @vphoenix5278 4 роки тому +7

      Why should he excuse himself when d bill will come to d table. He's already ur husband so no formal drama here.

  • @ThePatriotNurse
    @ThePatriotNurse 4 роки тому +813

    Everything you said in this video is spot on. If we want men in our cultures to function like men, it starts on Date #1. Thank you, Ma'am! Beautiful video.

    • @rupsu88
      @rupsu88 4 роки тому +23

      Act like this hoast sayes and i garantee to you you will woke some day at 40 years old single and alone and no mens woud not take you no more member there is 3biljon woemens so act like this and be alone

    • @DisCount66
      @DisCount66 4 роки тому +12

      Lol. I don't think there's a point in even trying to explain that to you... To explain what is wrong with what you said.

    • @marcusgarvey630
      @marcusgarvey630 4 роки тому +32

      Why be a traditional man when your not a traditional woman

    • @liberallooney6830
      @liberallooney6830 4 роки тому +30

      @@marcusgarvey630, preach brother. Women have no right to hold men to traditional standards of behavior when they don’t want to be held to traditional standards of behavior themselves.

    • @m.g.6178
      @m.g.6178 4 роки тому +18

      @@rupsu88 A man who is serious with a woman will take the full responsibility and pay. If he is not serious he will find dozens of excuses for not paying. Those guys are a waste of time. They will never marry you.

  • @Eveyeve932
    @Eveyeve932 4 роки тому +123

    If a guy can't pay for a date then he should focus on making money and NOT dating. My ex was always broke and I didn't know it until a few months down the road. He would pay in the beginning and never let me pay... But about 3 or 4 months in to the relationship he said he was waiting for his paycheck to clear and if I could get this bill this time. Of course I said sure. He's paid for so many before. But then it became more often. I was soooo in love with him that I gave him my car, paid his school, paid the entire rent when he lost his job and we moved across the country and I paid the Uhaul. So all of my financial debt could have been avoided if I had only said NO to paying for the dinner.

    • @stealthaccount573
      @stealthaccount573 4 роки тому

      why did you guys break up is it same reason

    • @t1234-q5z
      @t1234-q5z 3 роки тому +1

      Sounds like he was out of your league.

    • @An-yh2bl
      @An-yh2bl 3 роки тому +4

      Never stay in a relationship like that and never pay rent tuition etc instead of the guy. If he really loves you he will never ask you for those things. Paying dates is not equal to finance all his costs.

    • @t1234-q5z
      @t1234-q5z 3 роки тому

      @@An-yh2bl What are you even trying to say.

    • @An-yh2bl
      @An-yh2bl 3 роки тому +4

      @@t1234-q5z read and try to understand it, it's simple🤦🏻‍♀️

  • @cristineestrada6080
    @cristineestrada6080 4 роки тому +285

    Thank you! I was invited out for lunch on a first date. When the waitress brought the bill, she asked him, “would you like me to spilt the bill?” He told her yes! She came back with the two card holders and checks and handed to him. He actually opened to see which was mine and handed it to me! I paid and never went out with him a second time.

    • @Arkantosi
      @Arkantosi 3 роки тому +18

      Seems he dodged a bullet. Good for him!

    • @cristineestrada6080
      @cristineestrada6080 3 роки тому +6

      @@vaxan5126 ok mr. 8 subscribers😂

    • @cristineestrada6080
      @cristineestrada6080 3 роки тому +31

      @@Arkantosi yep, he’s all yours😂

    • @myjourney3748
      @myjourney3748 3 роки тому +43

      @@cristineestrada6080 lol you’re so funny 😂😂 men who wants to go 50/50 should date other men

    • @bri-leighxo
      @bri-leighxo 3 роки тому +21

      you go girl you dodged a bullet and a future “Baby” Man 😂

  • @ModernSouthernBelle
    @ModernSouthernBelle 4 роки тому +72

    If a man looks at you and goes "she should pay," or "she needs to get a job and pay her share," then HE JUST ISN'T THAT INTO YOU GIRL. Once a man is in love he doesn't want anything but your presence and to GIVE you the best things he can afford. Men that like you don't have their hands out like 5 year olds.

    • @DisCount66
      @DisCount66 4 роки тому +2

      These kind of comments were funny at first. Even by the second, and third, and fourth time... But by the twelfth time it is just kind of pathetic to read...

    • @DisCount66
      @DisCount66 4 роки тому

      @Scarlet Rose Sorry I did not understand that primary school slang

    • @DisCount66
      @DisCount66 4 роки тому

      @Hellcat BOYZ now you are worse than ladies in this comment section here. And they are bad enough...

    • @saniyauzumaki
      @saniyauzumaki 4 роки тому

      Kylo Ren I see where you’re coming from but yeah these women want to avoid men like the guy you just replied to, that’s why they’re applying this strategy. He may seem like a minority but you have no idea how bad dating scene is for women because of guys like him.

    • @DisCount66
      @DisCount66 4 роки тому

      @@saniyauzumaki Nope. These "women" are max in their mid 20s and have met 1 or at most 2 men that happened to be terrible and now generalise saying that dating scene is bad for women yada yada.

  • @Pk-wu9tl
    @Pk-wu9tl 4 роки тому +103

    As a gay man I am the same! When a man invites me out for drinks I always offer but expect him to pay just as I would pay if I invited him out for a drink!

  • @jonyu3597
    @jonyu3597 4 роки тому +69

    Anna laughing at 50-50 culture is so relatable XD

  • @ingula91
    @ingula91 4 роки тому +394

    I used to date a guy who was constantly making this painful moan when he was checking the bill. You know, the one that says 'that's a lot to pay'. I think he was expecting me to share the bill but after 3rd date when he did it again, i finally asked him why is he moaning and he told me obviously that he didn't expect such a high bill (nothing fancy, just a normal restaurant, dinner and wine,around 50£) and i just told him that if he struggles with money i can pay my half but if he can't afford dating, he shouldn't do it or choose another, cheaper form to avoid showing bad manners. And it was our last date...

    • @YoYo-nt7yf
      @YoYo-nt7yf 3 роки тому +58

      @@Hakwbebsu26 Men love talking about women like that but remain silent when they are being talked why they exploit women by wanting sex without committment.

    • @madelineasmr926
      @madelineasmr926 3 роки тому +1

      Lol whoops 😅

    • @MsSavyy
      @MsSavyy 3 роки тому +31

      @@Hakwbebsu26 To be honest I think the community on Anna's channel do not support equality in regards to modern feminism. Why? Because that equality you are referring to is stripping women out of being feminine so your comment does not apply in this particular community here.

    • @Hakwbebsu26
      @Hakwbebsu26 3 роки тому +9

      @@MsSavyy that’s cool but don’t complain when the man expects the women to stay at home and cook and clean all day.

    • @MsSavyy
      @MsSavyy 3 роки тому +37

      @@Hakwbebsu26 what is wrong with cooking and cleaning ? If he is the one working and providing for family, why wouldn't a wife take care of a households? I dont understand why I should be surprised by what tou said.

  • @GreenTara2010
    @GreenTara2010 4 роки тому +90

    A man must invest in you. If he is not spending on you, you are not important to him.

  • @Razan3bdullah
    @Razan3bdullah 4 роки тому +42

    We don't deserve this high quality content

    • @JessiicaxXOXx
      @JessiicaxXOXx 4 роки тому +2

      What a strange thing to say. Every lady deserves to know this...

    • @mariagodoy3554
      @mariagodoy3554 4 роки тому +4

      Ladies! She is simply expressing gratitude in a different way.❤

  • @shivi5669
    @shivi5669 4 роки тому +42

    My Elegant dose💞💞💞💞
    Women's who are following her since beginning will understand why she is educating us on this topic because psychologically we are also suppressing ourself from these small small steps in oder to prove ourself self- reliance and morden and educated women....

  • @happygolucky6284
    @happygolucky6284 4 роки тому +49

    I wish I knew this back when I was dating. I used to pay half so there was no expectation of anything physical. When I met my husband from the get go he would pay for everything. He’s about 10years my senior and I love being taken care of by him. I finally found someone that I felt was a gentleman and if I let him pay he would be respectful still. That’s why he’s my husband now 💖

  • @hanac.5991
    @hanac.5991 4 роки тому +38

    If we pay at the first date (when he should put all efforts to impress us) 99% we will continue paying for everything

    • @DisCount66
      @DisCount66 4 роки тому

      Lol. I can't even express what is wrong with that.

  • @OsamaMoloy
    @OsamaMoloy 4 роки тому +27

    If someone invites you for dinner that person is expected to pay it doesn’t matter if it’s a date

  • @DM-mf2yj
    @DM-mf2yj 4 роки тому +182

    ladies!! Don’t even pretend to reach for the wallet, it’s embarrassing

  • @maedae759
    @maedae759 4 роки тому +65

    I was invited on a date with a man like this. He dragged me around on the coldest night of the year on record here in Toronto, didnt even want to pay for the subway. We settled on a restaurant that was very inexpensive. I'm talking a $15 meal place, but was still very delicious. I thought, at least he will do this. At least he will pay for my $15 meal after not meeting me halfway to go on a date, and dragging me around in the cold. Nope. He didn't.
    I decided to go home. He paid for my uber back to my city, which was something, but I never contacted him again.

    • @white2925
      @white2925 4 роки тому +3

      Yeah, you did fine, he is a dusty, don't loose time with those dusties, focus on yourself!

  • @aminabarga8239
    @aminabarga8239 4 роки тому +16

    You are right ...I'm from Morocco so when I dated a man (moroccan ) i also wanted to show I am independent and I took out my wallet and wanted to pay and he blushed and got so upset and told me I should never do it again and whenever we are out he has to pay because he's a man.... and one time I dated a man from Switzerland and he invited me and I was like let me take out my wallet and I thought he would stop me no he didn't!!!!! I felt so cheap .. and whenever I date man from same culture I don't feel worried about paying or anything ... when i dated westerns I feel like feminist movement really fucked up their masculinity ...so they think woman should pay for a date and take him for trip wow

  • @amram.2874
    @amram.2874 3 роки тому +90

    Being a muslim, this is not strange for me. In Islam a man must provide for his woman and if she works, he is not allowed to touch or even ask how much she earns.
    My husband and I have had financial problems in the past and had to cooperate together to get out of that situation, but now when things are really good, he is providing for us and his parents.
    We have a son and I am going to teach him from the very early age how to treat women.
    I love your channel dear. Keep up the good work. 😙 greetings from Germany

    • @td2222
      @td2222 2 роки тому +5

      Additionally, in Islamic law the woman isn't obliged to do anyhousehold chores either! The hadith says that if woman do household chores it's a gift to you because it's not their responsibility or obligation. So judging from this, it's sad to see how few muslims there actually are..

    • @mariemunzar6474
      @mariemunzar6474 Рік тому +3

      In conservative Christian circles the man is expected to provide for his wife and family. It's only in these modern days that people are trying to place more pressure on the woman to pay.

    • @mariemunzar6474
      @mariemunzar6474 Рік тому +4

      @@td2222 marriage is a partnership and normally the woman does more household chores by default just because the man is typically more into his career while the woman because of her biology as a mother has stronger ties to her children and to her home. There is nothing wrong with that setup. Men and women complement each other and should love and respect one another in marriage regardless of their role in the marriage and in life.

    • @lazzykathrine5951
      @lazzykathrine5951 Рік тому +3

      I would be so uncomfortable with this system . Like this is so biased and bs. That's the reason Islam is Islam. I never respected this community every and after this , i understand why this is one of the worst community . Always up for Christianity and Hindu.

    • @ummlittlemuslim
      @ummlittlemuslim Рік тому +1

      Muslim lady here too. God bless our husbands

  • @nataliamt4487
    @nataliamt4487 4 роки тому +18

    Hello Anna! You and your knowledge is the best thing that ever happened to us! The more I watch yor videos, the more I understand so many things. I was dating only cheap men. This is so sad... I remember once I was on a date with a man who paid only for his drink, and it was super cheap (btw I must say it wasn't a great place for a lady at all). And I remember a boy who was working there - I remember his face when he had to tell me I must pay for my own drink because my date didn't do that. Not only his manner was poor, but also the whole conversation was really bad. He has nothing to tell me. I had to talk and be a "guide" of this meeting. Once I was so angry I stopped talking, we were sitting in silence for about 15 minutes. Please, ladies, we must have higher expectations because when you agree for a cheap men, they know they don't have try to be a better men.

  • @csmitchell85
    @csmitchell85 4 роки тому +16

    That dress is the epitome of elegance in my opinion. And thank you for this video! “You are educating him on how to treat you,” exactly! Take care and be well 😊

  • @lillyroon5937
    @lillyroon5937 4 роки тому +260

    Finally someone speaking the truth. And not hiding under the feminism agenda of fighting for the women's rights

    • @amerhousewife7813
      @amerhousewife7813 4 роки тому +6

      @Sylvie KbYES! Or they want to emasculate the men.

    • @perennementeh4049
      @perennementeh4049 4 роки тому +22

      I'm a feminist and I don't offer to pay, being feminist means that you should give me the rights to an education, work, vote etc etc I can pay for a male friend but I will not do it for a partner, it's different, their roles in my life are different

    • @johnnychannarong5484
      @johnnychannarong5484 2 роки тому +5

      @@perennementeh4049 that sounds like wanting to take the good aspects of equality while ignoring the negative .. an equal mindset guy isn’t traditional minded

    • @mimia.4810
      @mimia.4810 2 роки тому +6

      @@johnnychannarong5484 Not really. Feminism fight for equality of the sexes. Equality doesn't mean the exact same, it means the same value. We can acknowledge that men and women are different, and equal. It's not that hard to grasp.

    • @johnnychannarong5484
      @johnnychannarong5484 2 роки тому +5

      @@mimia.4810 yes feminism fights for equality but if you go on a date with a man and you expect him to pay, you just are saying that your time is worth more than his and you’re not equal

  • @blairanoid01
    @blairanoid01 4 роки тому +70

    I found that I even feel uncomfortable doing this when going out with an Average Joe friend. It has gotten to the point that I don't even like to go out with my male friends who are not generous enough to treat the women in the group! I wonder what you elegant ladies have to say about this topic when it comes to friends?

    • @LittleMissSomeone
      @LittleMissSomeone 4 роки тому +10

      Personally, I bend the rules a bit there. This is because I know some of my friends are really not well off, and I earn the most money. That being said- when I go to dinner with a male friend, I let him pay for dinner, but I will offer you pay for my own drink if we go to a bar afterwards.

    • @ennvee1989
      @ennvee1989 4 роки тому +29

      Personally, I believe that if a man is not trying to pursue you he doesnt have to pay. However,if one of your male friends asks you out on a date then he MUST pay.

    • @1maybeline
      @1maybeline 4 роки тому +10

      I would want to pay my way if it's dinner with a platonic male friend.
      From my experience, I've noticed that the only platonic male friends that pay for their female friends are the ones that are well-off financially.

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому

      Don't date your friends😱

    • @blognroses3161
      @blognroses3161 4 роки тому +1

      I feel the same! I am traumatised by cheapy men behaviours.

  • @denisethetravelingteacher64
    @denisethetravelingteacher64 4 роки тому +164

    A guy actually tried to throw a tantrum in the restaurant after asking me to go out with him because I didn't offer to pay my half, so I paid the whole bill and on the way out I calmly turned to him and asked him to delete my number and forget about having any further contact with me.

    • @naomislife398
      @naomislife398 4 роки тому +30

      Excellent reaction.

    • @Crt1982
      @Crt1982 3 роки тому +5

      Yeah excellent reaction on his part. Getting rid of numbers was good on both sides i guess.

    • @skasmow
      @skasmow 3 роки тому +10

      and he accepted that you paid for him!!!!!! i believe he may also be happy that you paid and he did not spend his money

    • @Hakwbebsu26
      @Hakwbebsu26 3 роки тому +5

      Because he wanted to split the bill you did that 😂😂😂 what happened to equality all you woman cried out for

    • @soul-music-word
      @soul-music-word 3 роки тому +1

      👏👏👏👏

  • @charlottelmbt6888
    @charlottelmbt6888 3 роки тому +43

    A short simple way to handle the situation is "Thank you for treating me to such a lovely evening ". Say this while gazing into his eyes and flash him a sweet, demure smile. This should be done just after he asks for the check.
    In latin culture its an unspoken understanding that if someone says "te invito" (I invite you), it literally means its their treat, they are treating you. So Anna is right, the one who invites is the one who covers the expenses.

    • @yaapeasah4443
      @yaapeasah4443 3 роки тому +1

      Same in Ghana. The man handles all finances.

    • @jcchrome5110
      @jcchrome5110 2 роки тому

      Is this true among women inviting friends to go out? Do they pay for their friends as a guest, or each pay separately?

  • @ruthannemackinnon588
    @ruthannemackinnon588 4 роки тому +183

    This is so refreshing, to embrace femininity. It's ok to be feminine.

    • @akasickform
      @akasickform 3 роки тому +5

      If you want to be feminine, don't expect to be treated equally

    • @mrspo7012
      @mrspo7012 3 роки тому +6

      Paying doesn't make you less feminine.

    • @caitlynnee5115
      @caitlynnee5115 3 роки тому +9

      @@akasickform We don’t want to be 😊. I believe that men and women are complementary not equal. Plus if you’re gonna mention equality look up “equity” that’s more important than equality

    • @いぶき-s9m
      @いぶき-s9m 3 роки тому +1

      You’re literally misogynist. This is literally internalised sexism. Me being feminine means I have to depend and rely on a man? NO THANK YOU. I can pay the bills myself, if you’re always relying on men to give you free meals, that’s just absurd.

  • @bogbrither
    @bogbrither 4 роки тому +86

    It's upbringing. I've been out with someone with limited means and he always paid. It's a matter of pride.

    • @evka24
      @evka24 3 роки тому +2

      u got a keeper

    • @andrewchatzidis3924
      @andrewchatzidis3924 3 роки тому

      The best thing a woman can do if she wants to have a successful relationship like truly wants one is to understand that she has to bring something more to the relationship then just her looks and entitlements

    • @evka24
      @evka24 3 роки тому

      @@andrewchatzidis3924 its up to u to find, chose and keep woman of High value...

    • @andrewchatzidis3924
      @andrewchatzidis3924 3 роки тому

      Well yes I'm responsible for myself and that's all I can focus on but ultimately I can't make a woman it's everyone's individual choice and responsibility how they are going to be

    • @bogbrither
      @bogbrither 3 роки тому

      @@andrewchatzidis3924 works both ways. But you'll learn with experience. Keep meeting new people and growing. You'll find a good woman, or your eyes will open up to see a good woman who might already be in your life! ❤

  • @foreverdavy4851
    @foreverdavy4851 4 роки тому +48

    YOU invite me out for a date, YOU pay. Period! And I have no reason to feel anything strange about it, it's normal.

    • @1maybeline
      @1maybeline 4 роки тому +1

      Yes, expect this! Men are supposed to romance the woman they are interested in. There's nothing romantic about expecting her to pay for plans that he has made.

    • @foreverdavy4851
      @foreverdavy4851 4 роки тому +4

      @@1maybeline Exactly! I don't understand why some (or mayve plenty?) of women out there feel the NEED to prove to a man than they can provide for themselves. Yes, we know you can. You're working, getting a monthly income, you SHOULD be able to take care of yourself. But WHY showing that off to a man who invited you for a date? I just don't get it😩 The only men I pay diner for are my YOUNGER brothers, and it's not even a date.

    • @coldtundra1794
      @coldtundra1794 Рік тому

      No, you enforce him to pay or else! You women are strong and independent like you say you are, so you the woman should have the physical means to make him pay for your meal! Secondly, don't go out on no DATE at all! Get to know the person that wants to get to know you! But it is known that American woman can't do anything simple as this!

  • @annagotohimgirl1385
    @annagotohimgirl1385 4 роки тому +57

    Once a guy asked me out on a date and when paying the bill he told me that we should split the bill and I was a bit bothered but I was like Ok whavever , then when paying the bill he didn’t have enough money to pay his part and asked me for money , I left the restaurant and left him there. I was so mad. Why did he invite me on the first place ? ☹️🤦🏼‍♀️

    • @totochanel2251
      @totochanel2251 4 роки тому

      Jesus. But you paid your part?

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому +2

      Really hope you only paid for yourself😱

    • @shakirghazali2890
      @shakirghazali2890 4 роки тому +2

      Female empowerment ?

    • @erikaerika-vt5km
      @erikaerika-vt5km 4 роки тому +1

      Ew auto ghosted.

    • @Crt1982
      @Crt1982 3 роки тому

      Go girl go! You are strong and empowered, show it to the world!

  • @michellelynch963
    @michellelynch963 4 роки тому +137

    I wish someone had told me all this when I was younger pass relationship 1st date and I paid ended up supporting him for 2yrs 🙊

  • @victorialindstrom4633
    @victorialindstrom4633 4 роки тому +78

    If a man doesn't have the intention to pay for his invite of asking her for a date, why even ask her out in the first place? It's rude in my opinion. If a man wants a woman he should definitely act as a gentleman.

    • @SG-gw5xo
      @SG-gw5xo 4 роки тому +11

      Cuz they want free sex and a lot of women disrespect themselves by providing free sex

    • @victorialindstrom4633
      @victorialindstrom4633 4 роки тому +6

      @@SG-gw5xo If a man only has one thing on his mind then he is not sincere. I agree women should definitely respect themselves and not go with low category of men.

    • @nadiarivera8269
      @nadiarivera8269 4 роки тому +6

      @@victorialindstrom4633you are so right. I'm almost 100% sure that there are women out there that have paid for the full dinner and then gone and been intimate with the man. He's of course happy he got a free meal and a girl and will forever call this girl every time he wants to have a good time on her dime.

  • @overworked123
    @overworked123 4 роки тому +258

    Yes! From a happily married lady: don't volunteer to pay and don't keep dating someone who just wants to go 50/50. You deserve to be cherished and provided for.... believe it!

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +26

      Again in the 1950's that might have been true but woman were not in the workplace like they are now, attaining the majority of Degrees.
      Why do **you** deserve to be "cherished and provided for" and your partner/husband does not? what makes you so special and worth more than your husband?

    • @sentaroapika1610
      @sentaroapika1610 4 роки тому +10

      @Tika Summers What roles do women have besides making babies?

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +6

      @@sentaroapika1610 making coffee 😍

    • @sentaroapika1610
      @sentaroapika1610 4 роки тому +6

      @@selfaware3940 Good thing that we have coffee machines now. Maybe in the future we will have baby making machines :p

    • @selfaware3940
      @selfaware3940 4 роки тому +7

      @Tika Summers well in addition to "test tube babies" there are now artificial wombs so the only unique thing that a woman brings to the table is an egg. Bit like all I bring is a sperm right..

  • @Abby-Brock
    @Abby-Brock 4 роки тому +79

    Once went on a date with a guy who took me to get frozen yogurt on “Two Dollar Tuesday.” At the end I thanked him for the date and he said, “Next one’s on you.” Sad because I really liked him up until then.

    • @sisterlavender1188
      @sisterlavender1188 4 роки тому +23

      That is so mean to say to a woman.

    • @SoEepyy
      @SoEepyy 4 роки тому +5

      I mean he took you to a cheap place, i wouldn't have even gone if we are not in an already committed relationship

    • @lalalalalala9333
      @lalalalalala9333 4 роки тому +3

      Lmaoooooooo.
      No date #2 for him.
      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @gorzkawodka
      @gorzkawodka 4 роки тому +4

      What a lame guy, it's good that you didn't waste more of your time with him.

    • @lalalalalala9333
      @lalalalalala9333 4 роки тому +6

      @That Guy If you are a broke man then you should not be focused on dating. You need to focus on learning how to not be broke. We live in a day and age where women don't earn as much as men and we're charged more for the products we need. If a man can't afford a date then all a woman can think is wow, what else can't he afford? Certainly he wouldn't be able to afford marriage or kids should it come to that.

  • @monicaball2691
    @monicaball2691 4 роки тому +11

    Perfect! This from a woman who fell into the trap in the past! Thank you, Anna

  • @mlmj1994
    @mlmj1994 4 роки тому +23

    My ego thinks: “What man ,who is asking me on a date, wouldn’t want to pay for my meal?”
    Thank you for these tips.

    • @siim605
      @siim605 4 роки тому +1

      @Hellcat BOYZ How? Asking someone out isn't a one-sided thing. One person asks, the other agrees. It's mutual. The "whoever asks first has to pay" thing doesn't work AT ALL in practice, because it doesn't apply to women.

  • @WolfDive
    @WolfDive 4 роки тому +82

    Once I offered to pay the bill for me and my bf (now ex) at a pricey restaurant we both agreed on, to show I was “considerate”, us being in a relationship for several months, and he never stopped me or offered to split. I was really embarrassed when I pulled out the card and the waiter looked at me oddly. I felt like a mom paying for her son or some type of sugar mommy, more when he looked younger than me even though we were the same age. It’s been 9 years and that scene still haunts me. Since then I don’t suggest anything out of budget and much less offer to pay or split.

    • @judycassey9247
      @judycassey9247 4 роки тому +10

      WolfDive then why on earth did you offer to pay if you were not ready to?

    • @patricksoundarapandian2230
      @patricksoundarapandian2230 2 роки тому

      If it’s obligated for a man to pay on the first date, then its is also obligated for the woman to have sex with him on the first date. Women always talk about ”equality” when it suits them.

    • @franciscoaleman2493
      @franciscoaleman2493 Рік тому

      @@patricksoundarapandian2230 Are you nuts? So, what? Sex in exchange for money-for-dinner? Seriously, are you NUTS?

    • @patricksoundarapandian2230
      @patricksoundarapandian2230 Рік тому +4

      @@franciscoaleman2493 if women can expect a man to pay what can men expect from women? Is it fair that she’s entitled to MY money and I’m entitled to …. Nothing???

    • @agent009vs007
      @agent009vs007 Рік тому

      Exactly my point, women are delusional. That’s just pure manipulation offering to pay knowing damn well you don’t want to 😂

  • @DivinelyProtectedBlessed888
    @DivinelyProtectedBlessed888 Рік тому +5

    The good thing for pay your own meal is he can't guilt trip you or manipulate you to do something you don't want to and you can leave or ghosting whenever you want if you see a red flag. But do not marry a guy who always demand you to pay food because when you guys married things will be intensify and you guys will have too much burden to carry. Pregnant, work, house bill, cleaning house, buy what you want. Be with mature person who understand how hard being a wife and at least be responsible with finances.

  • @tiffanyliu7230
    @tiffanyliu7230 4 роки тому +70

    I was once seeing a Netherland man, and he actually asked me to pay for the drinks we had in a nice lounge... I definitely declined and stopped to see him again.

    • @brendonsforehead4961
      @brendonsforehead4961 4 роки тому +12

      I’m asian but raised in the Netherlands, most ppl here have a 50/50 mentality unfortunately

    • @tiffanyliu7230
      @tiffanyliu7230 4 роки тому +2

      Brendons Forehead If it is 50-50, I can accept that. However he actually asked to pay for him.

    • @tiffanyliu7230
      @tiffanyliu7230 4 роки тому

      Oasis He invited me 😿

    • @white2925
      @white2925 4 роки тому +3

      Never pay for a man. I am with a Nordic man and from the very beginning I made him clear that I am traditional and not Scandinavian and if he wanted me, he had to court and chase me. So he just courted me and acted as a Gentleman. He put effort to understand my mindset and behave accordingly Always be clear about your mindset especially in the first phases. If it's not meant to be, move on and don't loose time with dusties. Nordic men are very spoiled and the fault is women behaviors. But in my experience they crave for a traditional feminine woman. Keep that in mind.

    • @ellapark8770
      @ellapark8770 4 роки тому

      How did you decline??

  • @lilipam909
    @lilipam909 4 роки тому +19

    So true! My boyfriend and I earn around the same income, but he always pays the bill. The only time I ‘pay’ is for really little and cheap things, like water or coffee if we’re outside and thirsty or something (this helps set the expectation that he pays for the expensive stuff hehe).

  • @emilyhart2252
    @emilyhart2252 3 роки тому +64

    Once a gentleman told me he was just starting a new job and didn't have much money, but would love to take me out when he got paid. I liked his honesty and the fact that he was trying to "lock down" a date with me for when he could treat me nicely. I told him he didn't need to have money -- that I knew lots of things to do that were free -- like concerts in the park, going to free lectures, free night at the planetarium, receptions for art exhibit openings -- dozens of fun, educational, elegant events. I showed him I wasn't materialistic and that I was creative and could adjust to any circumstances. Even though romance didn't happen we were good friends and had lots of fun together. When he could afford to take me out he made those times very special and whether it was a free event date or something else he always treated me like a princess.

    • @yaapeasah4443
      @yaapeasah4443 3 роки тому +9

      As you should be treated.

    • @Apo12345
      @Apo12345 3 роки тому +8

      That is a really nice story.

    • @LadyJani
      @LadyJani 3 роки тому +3

      That's how it should be :)

    • @alex47_in_downtown18
      @alex47_in_downtown18 2 роки тому +3

      loved ur story but I can't see why romance couldn't happen given that u weren't materialistic & entitled...

  • @darksun6977
    @darksun6977 4 роки тому +8

    If a guy takes me on a date and expects me to pay i'm paying and then Never contacting him again . Period.

    • @yaapeasah4443
      @yaapeasah4443 3 роки тому +2

      Pay your half

    • @hopeislandful
      @hopeislandful 3 роки тому

      Same any man who mentioned that to me he'd never hear from me again. Yuck.

  • @OjitosChiquititosmaquillaje
    @OjitosChiquititosmaquillaje 4 роки тому +13

    My boyfriend after 3 years was expecting me to pay every now and then. I was like ´NO WAY´ lucky I never did and we still together.

    • @rose-yw5xf
      @rose-yw5xf 4 роки тому +3

      @You stole my burrito, Charlie its not a red flag, every now and then after 3 years, its not a great thing to ask to pay but at that point is it really weird or off

  • @galinakoleva9624
    @galinakoleva9624 4 роки тому +19

    Ladies! I’ve had a guy asking me out for 6 months! He started messaging me in begging of June last year and just didn’t give up until I accepted in December. His actual words always were: “Please let me take you out on a date” So we scheduled a day a week in advance. On the day he messages me:” Where do you want to go?” Immediately red flag number 1!!! I responded shocked:” What you haven’t booked anything until now?” He pretended he just had a lot of places in his mind and couldn’t decide so he gave me a few choices and I picked one of them (all were high end restaurants). So the day comes and he makes me wait 35min alone for him in the restaurant, claiming he went on time, but got stuck on the train 🤦🏻‍♀️ (Red flag number 2) He finally arrives dressed in jeans, trainers and a scrunchy black T-shirt 😳 I was shocked as I was well dressed and I know this guy can dress well I’ve seen him before. So am I not worth your while to make an effort? (Red flag 3) Just as he sits he says to me immediately his plans after are to meet up with his friend a bit later. His friend will stop by to take him!!! (Extremely rude and red flag number 4). We had dinner, but he ordered most of the things. Then as the bill comes he looks at the bill, then looks at me and says: “Shall we split it 50/50?” I was so upset that I wasted my entire evening stood up and said: “Please don’t bother” Went to get my coat and left. He didn’t stand up after me and thank god he didn’t. This was a date from hell! Please be careful ladies to who you devote your time to!

    • @santap.3257
      @santap.3257 4 роки тому +1

      So who paid at the end ? 😦

    • @1maybeline
      @1maybeline 4 роки тому +1

      Women have to pay attention to their first instincts, because it's usually right.
      This guy was ridiculous! Did you leave him with the bill after all??

    • @NM-ou9el
      @NM-ou9el 4 роки тому

      Girl😱😭

    • @Anonymous-gw4tm
      @Anonymous-gw4tm 4 роки тому

      This is crazy!!! I've had similar experience... a boy (not a man at all) would beg me to agree to go on date with him...he never had a place picked out, showed up late, etc. So many red flags!! I wish I had your courage to say don't bother and walk away!! you go girl!!!

  • @kiradelarochefoucauld7499
    @kiradelarochefoucauld7499 4 роки тому +70

    NEVER Pay for anything for a man you are dating!. EVER! And don't sleep with them either. NO sex!

    • @danvaida6938
      @danvaida6938 4 роки тому +5

      You can sleep with their friends though

    • @zerowaste7117
      @zerowaste7117 4 роки тому +11

      @@danvaida6938 Well, maybe his friend was more of a gentleman😉

    • @piotrgwozdz4082
      @piotrgwozdz4082 4 роки тому +3

      @@danvaida6938 these women are funny xD

    • @mariagodoy3554
      @mariagodoy3554 4 роки тому +5

      @@piotrgwozdz4082 yeah but he was funnier 😛

  • @april-yz2ow
    @april-yz2ow 3 роки тому +5

    Gosh I needs to say this.... When I was 15, a 17 guy dated me. We went to a mall, I think, and he said he was hungry. So he buy his self a hamburger. It was lunch time I was hungry too and he said... "Why didn't you buy something?" I didn't have much money that time so I said I wasn't hungry. I was very stupid because I dated him 3 times more and he never paid for anything :( I think... I even pay once for our buss tickets. Omg!!!!!

    • @allthingsbeauty9175
      @allthingsbeauty9175 2 роки тому +2

      Good thing you learned young. At that age no one really has a lot of money unless your parents are giving you a good allowance or you’re working. But the fact that he didn’t even offer to split his food with you, showed he wasn’t caring.

  • @jamesharris9352
    @jamesharris9352 4 роки тому +46

    THE MAN BETTER PAY!
    WHATS WRONG WITH MEN TODAY!
    I'M OLD SCHOOL!
    BE A GENTLEMAN!
    PAY FOR THE MEAL!
    AND THE TIP!
    Ladies dump the guy if he doesn't pay!
    * what a lemon 🍋 of a man! 😡

    • @anishkavsingh
      @anishkavsingh 4 роки тому +4

      We need more men like you

    • @siim605
      @siim605 4 роки тому +2

      If all your worth is constituted by your ability to open and close your wallet, go ahead. Keep thinking you'll find a relationship with actual depth.

    • @anishkavsingh
      @anishkavsingh 4 роки тому +1

      @@siim605 so shallow of you to think that going 50-50 is the only way you'll find a "relationship with actual depth " 😂

    • @siim605
      @siim605 4 роки тому +1

      @@anishkavsingh That's a completely ass-backwards way to assess what I said. You know very well how dishonest you're being right now.

    • @urevya
      @urevya 3 роки тому

      @@anishkavsingh less beta's*

  • @kristenstewart1250
    @kristenstewart1250 4 роки тому +40

    The only time I ever offered to pay half on a date was when it was with guys from my past who contacted me out of the blue, and I was hoping it would be kind of a friend thing, but then they tried to kiss me after so obviously they insisted on more. But the thing is, I could NEVER be attracted to any man who let me pay for him. It's so unmasculine. If there ever had been any chance of me dating them and seeing them romantically, it vanished when they said "sure, let's split the bill!"

  • @letsunderhus3428
    @letsunderhus3428 4 роки тому +148

    Actually my current boyfriend was the one who taught me that. I would always split the bills with my exes (or just pay for it). My boyfriend now is a John Doe, he is still in college and has some simpler summer jobs and freelancer jobs in his field, but treats me like I am the most special lady in the world. Always paying in the restaurants, and pretty much every time he is with me while I am shopping for clothes, decoration or whatever, I obviously never go shopping for something that would be way too out of my budget. If I say I want chocolate he will take me to chocolate store and tell me to pick whatever I want. Some girls have seen him doing that and say he doesn't exist, well he does in our elegant world.

    • @Mannyman-sn4sc
      @Mannyman-sn4sc 3 роки тому +7

      Question what do you do for him in return that would make him feel special, if your answer is look pretty or perform activities in the bedroom than I feel bad for him because he is gaining nothing from that relationship

    • @suzyocean7392
      @suzyocean7392 3 роки тому +13

      @@Mannyman-sn4sc Some men enjoy treating their lady like a queen 👑

    • @Mannyman-sn4sc
      @Mannyman-sn4sc 3 роки тому +5

      @@suzyocean7392 men enjoy treating their women like a queen when said queen is actually deserving of that title

    • @Mannyman-sn4sc
      @Mannyman-sn4sc 3 роки тому +5

      @@suzyocean7392 any type of man that treats his woman like a queen and she herself doesn't have qualities that are deserving of that(like she only has looks and bedroom fun going for her and she is very masculine which most guys don't like) then he's basically treating her like that out of fear that she will leave

    • @suzyocean7392
      @suzyocean7392 3 роки тому +6

      @@Mannyman-sn4sc I am deserving of that title :) It definitely takes more than just looks or sex.

  • @DM-xj6se
    @DM-xj6se 4 роки тому +7

    "Acknowledge this ladies. Educate men." 100%!

  • @Arizona_lilly
    @Arizona_lilly 2 роки тому +6

    We get dressed get ready to go and we do take our time to get ready just to take our selves out and pay??? Never

  • @TheSandrafabian
    @TheSandrafabian 4 роки тому +32

    The expression in his face!

  • @projectedreflections4696
    @projectedreflections4696 4 роки тому +13

    👏👏👏👏 I was having this conversation with my colleagues & they thought I was crazy.

  • @MT-ck5hy
    @MT-ck5hy 4 роки тому +50

    Girl... I let a guy go cause he watched me pay the bill and didn’t even try to reach for his wallet

    • @mamabear1078
      @mamabear1078 4 роки тому +16

      M T you should have only paid your part of the bill and then left! 😂

    • @MT-ck5hy
      @MT-ck5hy 4 роки тому +3

      It was embarrassing as some people I knew were next to us and I didn’t want him to cause a seen... this was one many other disaster problems this male had (I am not even going to call him a man at this point)

    • @name-eo1lv
      @name-eo1lv 4 роки тому

      barns hippoboi yeah

  • @tiffanysalmond7007
    @tiffanysalmond7007 4 роки тому +28

    The girl in the beginning clip then went on “married at first sight Australia” because she had trouble finding a good man 🙃

  • @Adillacooks
    @Adillacooks 4 роки тому +51

    Ladies there’s no excuse for paying on a first date if he cannot pay , then he cannot afford you pullout your wallet pay for your share then never see him again.

  • @hc9319
    @hc9319 4 роки тому +27

    My boyfriend always excuses himself and leaves the table to pay the bill. Even at the supermarket he pays for everything. At first i felt awkward when he did that. But he showed me the true meaning of being with a gentlemen and what it means to be loved by one.

    • @The_Memorial
      @The_Memorial 2 роки тому +2

      So a moving wallet

    • @franciscoaleman2493
      @franciscoaleman2493 Рік тому +1

      Do you know what your problem is? That you want to be infantilized.
      The bs this woman talks about makes sense for women with no independent source of income, like those of Third World countries with no social-work development. Since women there are like children, basically private property of the men, it´s normal that they don't pay: they just can't.
      You can pay. You must pay... And yet you want to believe that you don't have to. You want to be treated like something you're not: a kid.

    • @Elisabetta.Scalisi
      @Elisabetta.Scalisi Рік тому +1

      ​@@The_Memorial A dusty clown complaining.

    • @The_Memorial
      @The_Memorial Рік тому

      @@Elisabetta.Scalisi please you are using him for his money😂

    • @Someone-qi1rr
      @Someone-qi1rr 10 місяців тому

      ​@@The_Memoriallike men use women for beauty and their bodies. Sorry but if I will be giving myself to you and have your children, better expect to treat me like a princess.