A Roadie's Experience of Drugs, Alcohol, and Sobriety
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- Опубліковано 4 вер 2022
- My story of alcoholism, drugs, and eventually getting sober while touring in country music.
Never be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
AA (Alcoholics Anonymous):
www.aa.org/
Al-Anon Family Groups:
al-anon.org/
NA (Narcotics Anonymous):
www.na.org/
Addiction Guide:
www.addictionguide.com/
SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration):
www.samhsa.gov/
NIDA (National Institute on Drug Abuse):
nida.nih.gov/
NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health):
www.nimh.nih.gov/
AFSP (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention):
afsp.org/
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Everyone knows when you play a rock and roll song backwards that it summons the devil, but what happens when you play a country song backwards? You get your wife back, your house back, your truck back, your dog back...
😂😂 well played well played
the farm... don't forget the farm...
And momma doesn’t die.
And you stop drinking.
TF?
It takes a massive amount of strength to share stories like this about your lows in life. Mad respect, man. Hopefully this video helps someone else who shares similar issues to get the help they need.
Thanks, my dude!
Agreed. It takes a great deal of strength to be vulnerable.
I've been going through a rough patch with my drinking. This past Saturday I think is gonna be the catalyst for me to get sober.
I've gone through a couple stretches, both a year length, from nudges from the judges. But ya, seeing this video is serendipitous as I'm on day one. I don't count Sunday cause when I woke up I was still kinda feeling the affects.
No it doesn't. It takes a lack of shame and a desire to make easy money.
@@Cheeseburger.Launch.Sequence this comment required a lack of shame and a deep desire for attention. Sorry about your childhood, bud.
My mother was a functioning alcoholic and abusive with it. I still carry the scars 60 years later. She died 9 years ago and I still can't bring myself to mourn.
Tank, I am so glad that your daughter will never know the life I led. You're a legend!
You don’t have to mourn, you just have to realize that your parents/siblings/ friends had problems, and now you do too possibly. Focus on RIGHT NOW and fuck the past and fuck the future. What are you going to do today to take your mind off the shit that is killing you? Got any hobbies? You should probably focus on them. I’m currently drinking, so if you want to talk I will welcome you and listen.
You are what they make you, and then they ridicule for how you are. I met my natural mother at the graveyard.
The addicts who bought me from the State of Ohio; I wish that I would have killed them when I was a juvenile. She would be dead now, and I would have gotten some help as a kind and have not turned out like this.
'Muh smokes, muh booze, muh pills; where's muh check?' Shitty old boomers are scum.
"Fuck you goddam kids. Fuck you."
Thanks for this Tank. I'm 12 days sober after a brutal 2 year relapse. I'm back in sober living and determined to do this the right way. Much love and keep kicking ass.
Just remember, dude, a relapse is NOT failure. I can't tell you how many people I know who now have YEARS of sobriety and relapse is a major part of their story. Stick with it, and just know we don't shoot our wounded, and help is always there if you need it!
@@TankTheTech excellent advice bro……you definitely seem to get it!
Shit that sucks.
you are the rock stay strong
I'm glad you made it back! I've been there a few times. It's way easier to stay sober than to get sober 🤘🏻
Thank you Brother. I am also struggling with Alcoholism and drugs. Your Story is inspiring. I'm the guy this might help out. We come from the same background and scene. The struggle is real.
Be strong, dude! There are a lot of us out there, and we all need to help each other!
Thanks brother. I’m in my late 50’s. A life long drinker. I’ve been thinking of quitting since it’s starting to affect my health…. My eyes welled up listening to your story, because I can relate! You are so strong willed. Thank God. That’s it….
As of today…. The bottle is going to be in my rear view mirror! Thank you very much for you courageous words. It’s one thing to tell your story at a meeting, but to thousands of viewers? Heroic! Thanks.
5 years sober here. How's it going?
I hope you're still doing well mate
It has been 11 months. Did you pull it off?
Fell off a little. Back on …. It’s tough.
@pete9688 as long as you keep trying my man! It will be worth it in the end
I totally understand what you are saying, and the story.
I been there my self, 26 year straight on every drug known to man. And 26 years I can't remember.
I couldn't stop talking drugs, it was the only way I could get up in the morning.
I had a similar situation with friends and girlfriend leaving my ass. One day I had a clear moment and decided to stop. Two days later I had a suicide attempt (morphine and alcohol) my brain just couldn't handle it! I Woked up the next morning in my own piss, vomit and shame..
Then the real hard part came, I had to admit to my self I had a BIG problem, and I went to the psychiatric hospital and they locked me up for a month and helped me through the cold turkey. I had night terrors, sweating like crazy and didn't eat for the first 11 days, I was just laying in bed crying..
It's a little more than two years ago now, and like you it's the best thing I've ever done to myself 🙏 I'm very slowly getting to know who I am without drugs, because I can't remember who I was before drugs, it's like being born again.
I still have music, the biggest love in my life 🖤
Thanks for sharing your story, and thanks for introducing me to new music 🙏
MUCH love, and thank you for being open and sharing this!
I do NOT miss that Cold Turkey experience. Congratulations on your journey, I'm glad you are here.
The next day at the hotel room story gave me anxiety, having that sick withdrawal feeling plus not knowing what happened is the worst feeling ever. I am glad you found out and stopped when you did. That is way more difficult than people think. It took me two OWIs, and waking up in the hospital deciding to walk home on my own with the IV hanging from me. I miss the only having a couple beer days, but can't risk it turning to whiskey binges again. Not worth it. But ive been sober since Feb 2021. I just spend about every hour outside of work with my music to stay busy. had to put this dumb addictive personality where it should of been all along
Stick with it, man. It's difficult at times, and I honestly think we as addicts are truly never fully recovered and have to keep wanting it, otherwise the addiction will take over again. Trust me, I occasionally want a beer or liquor as well, but I just remind myself of how much I hated myself back then, and how much I love life now.
Congrats man. This was a few months ago so I hope you’re still doing well. I was a pretty big shit bag. Drinking way too much too often. My wife wanted a divorce and I thought if I got sober I’d save it. I got sober for her but realized she was gone so I ended up dojng it for myself. 11 years later I have a family with the most amazing woman. I appreciate her so much more because of where I was. Again.. I hope you’re still doing well. You said 2021 so you’re really starting to rack up some good time.
I have never considered myself an alcoholic... I drink at home probably 6 days a week... and my 2 or 3 bottles of beer each night has escalated to 7 or 8 since covid started.
Watching your video has definitely pointed out some traits in my behaviour that indicate highly addictive behaviour, other than the consumption levels alone.
I tell myself, I don't drink around my child cause I wait til he's in bed, but there's probably alcohol in my system on the school run.
I also tell myself I sleep better when I've had beer but thinking logically that can't be true as I'm up 2 or 3 times in the night to pee.
I have stopped paying money each month into my savings account, telling myself inflation is crazy over the last 2 years when in reality, the amount I spend extra on booze would cover the savings and more.
Not saying things will change, but I will definitely think about your story when I consider having that 'just one more' drink.
Good luck man. Food for thought: what happens if you have to rush to the hospital because your child is sick and you can't drive?
Dude, thank you for being open and sharing that, and it's awesome that you're able to just sit and think about your own habits and behavior. Whether you choose to do anything about it now or later, it seems like you're at least aware. 💪
Be careful. It might not be the "just one more" that gets you. It could be a slow progression over years, with plenty of time to normalize and justify habits and consumption before escalating in some way. You're not going to be able to hide if from your kid forever. Once he finds out, it might be easy to convince yourself that you don't need to wait until so late to get started anymore. No judgment, just caution. You may not know whether you're still in control until you're not.
I believe Dave Mustaine said something along the lines of “addiction is like making love to a gorilla-you’re not done until the gorilla says you are”
I’m one of those people who cannot have 1 or 2 drinks. I told myself I was ok because I quit using any and all other drugs not long after I got married. That was nearly 20 years ago, and my drinking slowly spiraled out of control. I got help, but I’m still struggling today. Thank you for sharing your story- I needed to hear it.
That was my big problem, too. If I kicked one thing, I just got heavier into something else. It's a struggle, man, even in sobriety.
I have a huge respect for sober colleagues. This whole industry is based on drinking with the right people.
There is nothing quite like the joy of recovery and ongoing sobriety when you have descended to the basement on the elevator to hell, only to be reborn. I cannot express how good I feel, elated, euphoric, opposed to depressed and suicidal. I have made this happen, alongside my HP JC. I look forward to every day, with renewed vigour, and there is quite literally nothing that I cannot achieve now! I had to go there, to get here, but it was all worth it, in the end, to know true happiness. Thank you tribe, my dear friends, I got you! 💯 You have 1 month and one day extra sobriety on me, congratulations on your four sober years, you truely rock! Also, thank you for being loud, proud, and sharing just like me, I shout my sobriety from the rooftops so others do not suffer in silence! I relate to your post so strongly, the similarities are so many, so thank you, from the bottom of my heart for this video, I totally devoured every beautiful word. Keep up the great work brother, I love your work, it inspires me! Ady Heywood, Blackpool, UK
Tons of respect. Coming from someone who is currently traveling his own recovery and sobriety journey, a lot of your story really resonates with me. This upcoming Friday, Sept 09, I'll be hitting five months of sobriety from drinking as well.
Hell yeah, dude!
Good for you! That's good stuff man.
How's it going?
Good on ya. As a recovering heroin addict with 7 yrs sober (besides a bit o' weed) after 15+ years of struggle, getting sober was worth all the pain of the process. It's amazing to have a bank account and my life back.
Mad respect to talk about this. You didn't have to, but there's guaranteed someone out there among the viewers who will see this and maybe see themselves. So happy for you. This bridge is not safe. But you got over it. Mad respect dude.
This has helped me quite a bit. I am about to go into my first drink free weekend for at least the last 10 months. I used to drink at least 36 beers over a 2 day period. Then because of the hangovers I'd have a ton of drinks during the week as well, still somehow making it to work, but every night I would have a couple to avoid the hangover, stress and anxiety of day to day life. Hearing your story gives me hope and the desire to also say I QUIT. My life has turned to absolute shit over the last couple years and I've only recently realised that it might actually be a problem. I've been a weekend drinker for the last 10 years, every day of the weekend, but when it started happening during the week as well, I realised that it is really not for fun anymore.
Do what's best for you! There are a lot of people out there dealing with the same kind of addictions, so never be afraid to reach out and ask for help!
Go to an AA Meeting...... You cannot believe the support you will get..... So far, one day at a time, I have made it 39 years..... BUT i am ONE drink away for a relapse....
I grew up in a small town and then went to college. I drank every night and therefore my grades dropped and I had to look at other avenues. I got reinstated but I didn't think I could do it because of the normalization of alcohol. I am now taking courses online and pursuing my dream. It gets pretty tough not being able to be out with others sometimes, but this video gave me clarity to where I'm not alone. Thank you Tank for this video. You inspire me to be better even when it's easier not to.
Thank you for watching, man. I know sometimes it’s easy to think we‘re alone in whatever we‘re going through (trust me, been there), but we never are. There will always be people there to help and talk if you need it.
I recommend watching Steve-O's podcast. He got sober years ago and has been doing great. He tells good stories, is honest about addiction and how he deals with it, but he also is very direct with his guests about it. I've heard some real famous people talk drink and drug issues very comfortably, explaining how it was for them.
Steve-O is a great example for people who struggle to stay sober I think, as is this video from Tank.
A few days ago was the first time I went out at a bar since I stoped drinking a couple of years ago. It was kinda hard because it was such a weird feeling being in such a place without drinking. I kinda felt bad and for a second I was debating if maybe a beer wouldn't be that bad. I'm glad I didn't do it and when I got home completely sober was a really good feeling.
Good decision, man.
It gets easier, but it's not easy.
I'm sober for over 3 years now. And to me one of the most important things to mention - if not THE most important thing - is: If you offer someone a beer and this person says "No, thanks.", don't EVER argue about that decision. Let's make it okay to not drink, and we all are gonna be better. And thank you for the video, I think it's very good for everyone affected to see that they are not alone with it. Tank you Thank.
Totally agree with you. I've actually been in situations at bars with friends when a bartender has actually given me shit for NOT drinking, and I'm like "what the kind of fuck bartender are you that you're pushing alcohol when someone says no". Ridiculous.
As a alcoholic my self it was well explained . I was drinking up to a gallon of Jack Daniels a week, beer by the case
Bad divorce. But one day I had enough and realized I needed to stop and I did cold turkey . Been sober for over 18 years . I’m happier then I ever been. So thanks for telling your story, it takes courage and I respect you for that . I also have a addictive personality and people told me the same,just have a few stay in control. But I couldn’t have one beer I would need the whole case . So it’s better to just not do it all .. Stay Sober , it’s a daily challenge but I’m with you brother. Thanks for sharing and being honest .
This definately applies to me. Alcohol makes me become a person im not proud of. I am currently trying to stay sober for 30th time. Hopefully it will click permanently one day. Thank you for sharing your story.
Even if it's the 30th time, you're still trying, man! Sobriety is a constant struggle. I'm not gonna sit here and lie and tell you I don't think about drinking or using from time to time. It's all about remembering what I can actually lose if I give in to those thoughts and urges.
I have faith you can do it! Its hard I struggled with it for a while but I made it through and I'm sure you can too!
@@DaysOfDarknessUK You're exactly right, it's so funny, I've struggled with drinking too much for longer than I care to admit, but I had ZERO problems kicking drinking soda. When I was much younger I'd drink 8-12 Cokes a day. I'd be the guy that'd go to the gas station in the morning before work, get a breakfast burrito and a 32oz Fountain Coke. One day I just saw how many cans were around me, plus I was over weight, and I just quit. Cold turkey. I just quit buying soda. Haven't had one in shit, 10 years at this point? At a restaurant I just get water, or very occasionally milk at like a fast food place or something. Drinking on the other hand. Well, let's just say 8-12 beers makes you feel WAY better than any number of Cokes ever could, so it was much easier to kick the Cokes than the booze lol.
I have 7 years sober now. This is a great video. You brought up a lot of really great things being sober is a program for people who want it! Not a program for people who need it. One is too many and a thousand it's never enough!
Thanks Tank
Congrats my man. This shit works if we work it!
Damn dude this hit hard. I hadn't had my first drink till i was 26 because my parents, as great as they are, had serious issues with alcohol. I've recently discovered that i'm not an angry drunk, like my parents, however i have discovered it's becoming way too common of me to drink. I'm legitimately going to take a long break and i'm glad you made this video. Stay strong sir.
@Jarheads4life719 I hope you found the answers you needed.
I also am an Alcoholic, just went through detox and man that sucked!!! I will never forget that experience!! It literally takes over your whole body, the shakes that wake you up , i was at the point were it was waking me up every 4 hours and id have to drink just to be able to go back to bed to go to work the next day! Its a damn nightmare!!! And it sneaks up on you too!! I used to be able to manage it but eventually it all comes to a head!!
Huge courage to tell this. I’ve had my mom and dad both go to rehab when I was in High school both have been sober 9 and 10 years now. So I know this took balls to tell thank you tank. Proud of you man!
“I can’t and….I can’t”. I see you. I’m right there with you! The pandemic rally exposed just how big my problem had gotten. Ended up in a treatment program to start 2022 and now my life and music career have already rebounded in ways I never could have dreamed of just a few short years ago.
It's amazing what some of us addicts can do when we actually work to get sober. Much love and continued success!
You are not alone, the lockdown was really hard for so many of us. It was the catalyst that got me to my lowest point too. Although I don't really blame the pandemic, I blame the response to it, but then again, nobody MADE me go to the liquor store, that's neither here nor there right now. I too really went off the rails for a while. When there's LITERALLY nothing to do except sit at home and get drunk there was no reason NOT to! So that's what I did. What used to be a once every couple weeks turned in to 4+ times a week, plus I'd be choking down Advil with swigs of Vodka the next morning to give me some relief from my hangover, and then I'd be in the same place again by midnight that night.
I saw your post a year ago. But back then, alcohol was still too much a part of my everyday life and I ignored your video. Now I've been sober since July 2023 and I discovered your video again by chance and this time I didn't ignore it. I am very impressed by how openly and objectively you talk about your alcohol (and drug) problem. You were very close to becoming a real physical addict. And I'm very proud of you that you managed to get out of this downward spiral. I too have realized what a liberation it is to live without alcohol and how much quality of life you gain. All the best to you and I look forward to more EC vlogs from you.
Congrats on your ongoing sobriety. Been sober for 20 years myself. To this day my number one question I still get asked is…”How can you be in band and not drink??” My answer to that is “it’s not a part of my life anymore.”
Great answer. You can still do the things you love while being sober.
@@TankTheTech 💯 my friend!!!
I've never been drunk, I don't like any alcohol and people often ask WHY? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT YOU'VE NEVER DRANK? Weird how deeply rooted it's in our culture. You're an outcast if you don't drink at a party.
I think it is important to share your story (if you're comfortable doing so!), as you just never know who is listening. Someone might see themselves reflected in you, and decide they might need to start their journey to sobriety as well. I know that was what happened to me - I was at an open meeting with my gf at the time. I went to support her, as I certainly had no issues with alcohol or drugs (rolls eyes)! The speaker that night told MY story, and the fact that I even listened was because the speaker was also a musician like me. Did I quit that night? Naw, but that really messed up the last few months of my drinking! I also knew where to go when I decided to get sober myself, and I have been sober since. So thank you for being willing to put yourself out there like that, I bet you will have an impact on someone's life, just like someone else's story did for me.
It floor'd me the first time someone told my story. Glad you are here.
I'm a recovering alcoholic (280 days). I used alcohol, unknowingly, to cope with severe depression for the past 13 years.
You've got a great platform to tell this important story and I'm glad you did this. Sometimes hearing someone else persevere through addiction is enough to convince others to evaluate themselves.
Stay strong, brother! It's always constant work, but every day that goes by, it certainly gets easier!
Alcohol is all I ever got into, but it ran my life for a couple years and was abusing it well before and even after I got out of the worst of it. I've had that "maybe I shouldn't drink anymore" thought several times. I got to the point where I was drinking as soon as I woke up, thankfully that wasn't a long period of time, but I got there. Alcohol can do damage comparable to drugs, it sometimes get over looked due to not being as inherently dangerous, but I've known people that have been killed from it.
Thanks for sharing your story man. As someone who has struggled with that shit it is inspiring to hear about other people that have gone through it.
Being a ex roadie AND from the UK where the culture is very substance based I feel this video wholeheartedly.
I was a truckie and spot op so my problem was always fighting the tiredness.
Trying to sleep backstage in the blazing heat whilst the band set up / sound checks/ plays was always a challenge and it got to the point where red bull just wouldn’t cut it….
Availability and normalisation in the industry was always a problem. That and it wasn’t really taboo like on civvy street. That is until it affects your work and then it really is.
It’s all good fun and truly a lifestyle when amongst friends and done for leisure, when it starts becoming a method of survival or reliance that’s when the problems start.
I know guys that literally tour to support there habit, they have no real home or family to go home to they literally jump tour to tour to keep the supply going and most are lying to themselves,
The relationships that failed - they couldn’t handle my lifestyle,
It’s never there own fault.
Touring and especially trucking gets in your blood and is incredibly hard to get out because it’s enjoyable and your colleagues are your family, you see them more than any real family and to let it all go is next to impossible but some people just have to.
I was one of those people, if I was to have stayed touring I would have passed the point of recognising I have a addictive personality and being able to do something about it, it would have enveloped me.
An example of how common place it is I once worked a major electronic music artist where at the start of my tour the question was asked if I wanted my PDs in cash or coke.
The industry is cleaning itself up for sure but for some that will be the death of the industry for others it will be a clean start
Holy fuck dude I am very glad you shared this. I can honestly say that I've definitely developed shitty drinking habits and even some of my friends who "got sober" just replaced their alcohol with THC and shit. It's so hard to walk around and try not to drink when there is 8 million beer commercials, signs, etc. It's so embedded in our culture, and for me, my family, that it's so hard to escape it. I've been working on trying to reduce my drinking at the very least and I've had some success, but then I have a night where I have 6-8 beers and I'm back at square one. Again, thank you for sharing this. It means a ton. Keep taking care of yourself and being the awesome dude you are!
Thc is a way better choice. Those people are smarter than soberiety
You're not back at square one with nothing. You're back at square one with what you learned. It's a different thing.
I feel like I'm somewhere in the middle of bad alcohol addiction and not. It's very confusing. I really appreciate this video.
I say this empathising, "the toils of functioning" is meant in humour. I might know exactly what you mean
14 minutes in he describes what it's like t have a problem and being sober
I found this video yesterday while i was wasted and saved it for later. I am now watching it being sober for 22 hours and i broke down several times listening to your story. Im now seeking help for my alcoholism because i cant stop on my own. Thank you 😢
Dude, thank you for being open and vulnerable enough to share that on here. Stay strong! Help is always there if you're willing to ask for and accept it!
Thank you for responding. Its not easy staying sober right now. I have so much going on that makes me fall back on the bottle but your video has given me the strength to at least reach out for help and try to get sober.
Thank you so very fucking much for sharing your story. I'm a little over 8 months sober and it was the best decision I've ever made. For Me, my family, and every other addict who thinks they can't get fucking sober! All the love, bruv.
Keep at it, man! Congrats!
Everyday is going to be a battle, my friend. Every time you are tempted, look at your current life, your wife & your beautiful child & know they all need you to be sober. Sending strength & love. I enjoy seeing the Tank I have come to know via this platform. Stay strong brother!
Wise words, my friend. Thank you!
Struggling with alcohol myself this hits hard. Music is my only escape from that vicious circle. So channels like yours helps me in huge way. Thank you mate. Honestly.
This brings back memories of getting absolutely hammered in the back of the bus going from one show to another. It was a very dark time indeed. I’m happy to report that I have been off the sauce for a little over two years. Good luck with your sobriety my dude.
Congrats, man!
Went from not liking you, to enjoying your vids, to now MAD RESPECT! Thank you for this video! I’m 17 days sober and it’s been my idk 8th attempt to keep sober. Thank you for this vid!
17 days is 17 days! Keep it up! Also doesn't matter how many times you fall off the horse if you keep trying. I know tons of people that have had relapses over the years but they kept coming back to get sober.
This video really hit me deep inside. Something similar happened to me. You never realize when youve crossed the line. 2 days wasnt enough for me. 3 days minimum. Of course, i got fired.
I was so fed up with these ups and downs so i stopped. Everything around me has totally changed: the relationship with my girlfriend, my parents, my friends and my work.
It may be difficult for some to understand but i am not happy for being able to quit on time. I am happy for being the person i just became. So fcking good man.
Rap, country, folk, techno, extreme metal (my world)..... who cares the style you like? Music never fails. Still is and always will be my drug. And this will never change until the end of my days
Just started following you after the Blue Ridge debacle lol and seeing this video for the first time today. I didn't even know you were sober. You probably won't see this but the video spoke to me. I heard myself in it several times. I've struggled with alcoholism for awhile now, just been too much of a pussy to let it go once and for all. You should be so fucking proud of yourself. My favorite thing in the world is drinking beers and metal shows. Sometimes it ends bad, sometimes not. I never know. I struggle with how tf can I go to a show sober??? Will I have to give them up? You did it and you were so deep in the music scene. You inspire me to try again 🖤
One of my biggest things before I got sober was „how am I gonna have fun going out and doing the things I like without drinking“. It’s not easy at first, but fast forward a bit later, and I truly have more fun going out sober. I remember everything, I’m never hungover, etc. Sometimes it takes multiple tries. There’s no shame in that. But don’t ever let anything make you give up trying if it’s something you feel like you need to do.
Hey tank my name is Fred from Brooklyn NY. Just saw your video on sobriety and I'm proud of you brother. I'm sober myself over a yr now. I was a half gallon a day vodka drinker and shooting coke n heroin I was a mess. Moved to Florida and bn sober since and I'm an AA meeting goer every wk on my days off from work. I also play 🎸I'm an old metal head from the 80s. All the best and I dig the show.
Hell yeah, brother! Congrats on your year!
The similarities in your story and mine, especially for the first 5 minutes of this video are almost scary lol. Replace Illinois with Minnesota and your and my stories are identical, including the weekend in jail but no DUI. I have a dope-ass life. I play music and work on Sprint Cars. But I also REALLY like drinking. During the pandemic is when I really went of the rails. There were no gigs, no races, literally nothing to do. Like you said about growing up in the middle of nowhere, except ratcheted up to 1000 because of the lockdown in a blue state. There was nothing to do except get blackout drunk, so that's what I did. Your story about days off, that was what I did for the first part of 2020, then when everything came back, I just kept behaving the same way. Not as often, but still, it was bad. That being said, I've replaced my drinking habit with now legal Delta-8 Weed Edibles. Is it a perfect solution? No, but I don't want to give up partying entirely, just now I spend way less money, I'm ingesting way fewer calories, and I haven't had a hangover in 6 months. It's an imperfect solution, but I am an imperfect person, and it's so much better than what I was doing before.
Edit: upon reaching the end of the video, perhaps I'm on a similar trajectory and in a couple years I'll be over that too. Goes to show that none of us are really as unique or clever or as special as we think, but in a good "you're not alone" kind of way lol. Everyone thinks they're alone, especially with stuff like this, but the similarities in your story and mine are like I said before almost scary. Neither you nor I were the first to struggle with an addictive personality and alcohol, and I'm sure we won't be the last.
One of the best things I heard another sober guy tell me when I was first getting clean was "Dude, you think you're special? You're not. You're addiction is not unique. You're just like every other addict". Haha. It sounds harsh to someone that doesn't understand, but it's the truth. Tons of people have gone through the same stuff before us, and tons more people are going through it now and will in the future.
And I won't judge ya for the weed. Hell, I wouldn't judge you for ANYTHING, because I get it. But if the weed was your way of taking that first step to kicking booze, then good on ya. 💪
My story isn't as exciting as yours with the touring but I'm a year and 3 months sober. It's dealing with a full load of trauma and my wife having to kick me out to get sober. I always fixated on taking care of everyone around me and not taking care of myself. I would easily drink a massive amount of beer and wine to 'sleep' and one thing that you said was that you drank after the job. So once everyone was sorted I would drink. Thank you for sharing your story. I'm working forward to then actually produce content to teach people how to cook. It's now self confidence and everything else.
Stay strong, man! 💪
Thank you for your experience strength and hope. I have a couple days past 2 months sober after having over a year sober. It's nice to hear a testimony from this perspective of someone in the music business. Congratulations brother. One day at a time 🙏
Congrats to you as well, man! Stay strong!
I'm glad you made it back!
Keep it up today. 14 years, one day at a time.
There is nothing harder to do in this life than try to fake it in the music business, and there is nothing harder than you can do on the guitar than make a living.
Something has to give, and if you make the wrong choices, that something becomes you.
Don't drink today and go to a meeting..... It is a very simple program that is the hardest thing you will ever do.
Hell yeah man. I quit drinking a year and 4 months ago and in that time realized all the problems that were driving me to drink were caused by my drinking. Life is 1000% better now. 🤘🏼
Hell yeah dude! Congrats!
Nice Share!!!! I've been Clean and Sober since 8/22/09. It's now 10/13/23. I am truly Grateful for my Life and my Sobriety that I get to live my Life with today. It's amazing how people like us can be different ages, have different backgrounds, and live in different places, but have the same or very close to the same stories!!!! And you ain't lying about how sometimes Life happens and it's difficult, but it's so much better dealing with that stuff Sober. Life is good and I wouldn't have most of the things I have today if I wasn't Sober. Not just this "things" but the true relationships and the Serenity I have today!! I hope you're still on this journey and you're still "Keeping it Real". Keep Keeping on, my Brother!!!! -- Dave D Long Beach
It's weird to watch this having just come off a country tour early. I definitely get where you're coming from man and mad respect for how far you've come.
Greetings from Germany. It probably took a tons of courage for you to upload such a video and I'm happy, that you decided to open your heart to a broad audience.
I'm currently one year away from my graduation and noticing quite a "partying" trend that took foot in my whole age-group. It probably started with the latest summer holidays, when I was told, that friends were, in the worst case, drinking one day after another. And I still have the feeling, that somehow they think it's cool to tell others their story of being blacked-out and vomiting every single time, they drank too much.
Yet they literally don't stop. The nicest person can turn into an asshole because of alcohol, and that's what's worrying me.
Another thing is, that I must have the excuse of "still having to drive home", when I visit someones birthday party, 'cause I don't know wether it's gonna be nice, to drink with them, or if I'm gonna become dumber like they do. Tho if I don't have that excuse and still don't want to drink, because it doesn't taste good, they'll just look at me in a weird way, and think: Wow what a pussy.
It's like a vicious circle: I want to hang out with them, because they are good and funny persons, yet they eventually start to drink if they have the chance. Then I tell them, that I don't want to because I don't want to, and then I'm right in the middle of completly filled up people, who don't remember shit the next day. God bless the other group of people, which I'm also aquainted with, who have the exact same thoughts. I'm not hating alcohol, if they keep the right dose. You know, becoming more relaxed and talk more. Set the barriers of anxiety elsewhere. But if it's just being used to get blackouts and stuff, I can't sympathize.
I literally just hope, that they don't end up in the elevator you mentioned. They pass one floor after another, and do not find or even search for the Exit button. I can't help them, because as soon as I tell them that I'm worried, they either end up acting like I'm stupid, or they tell me, that everythings fine. All I can do, is pray for them and hope, that my suspicion is wrong...
Was für eine Selbstreflexion und das in dem Alter! Du machst alles richtig, lass dir nichts einreden. Mittlerweile merke ich nicht mal mehr, wenn jemand im Freundeskreis NICHT trinkt. Hab Geduld, das wird sich (hoffentlich) einrenken. Ich kenn aber auch 1-2 Leute, bei denen es nach wie vor ein großes Problem ist. Leider müssen die das selber einsehen..
I have friends from Minooka - a small farm town outside Chicago. Lots of drugs. One friend is fresh out of rehab. Glad you’re doing well.
Dated a girl from Minooka, and grew up a little ways from there. Definitely familiar with that small town drug abuse scene.
The Country scene is actually quite comparable to the German "Schlager" scene. My drum teacher has done many, many tours with big Schlager stars (Heino etc. for those who know) and has been on "Musikanten Stadl" and other well-known German Schlagershows. He has also played with countless other big names in the music industry from other genres, like really big international names. But he says that the schlager scene is undoubtedly the most wild and filled to the brim with drugs and alcohol and there's nothing quite like it. Not in pop, not in metal, you name it. On tour, all you had to do was basically snap your fingers and there were prostitutes and cocaine waiting for you in the hotel room (not that he did that ... of course.) And you couldn't be backstage at some of those TV shows without seeing a well-known Schlager singer snorting something. It's nuts. A few years back there was a big scandal in Germany because they found cocaine in the bathrooms of the Musikanten Stadl show and I could only think: Yeah, no shit... There's a reason why they are so happy and smiling all the time. It's crazy how some environments encourage you to do stupid shit without actually "telling" you to do it. Glad you got out of that circle.
Proud of you brother. I’m coming up on 7 months sober and man is it hard starting out and it’s still hard sometimes, but it’s worth it. It takes a strength that is hard to summon, but you did it. This video is genuinely inspiring and it’s the push I needed today to keep going down the sober road. Thank you
Congrats, man! Keep working at it!
Don't stop before the miracle happens! I promise you, It will happen in time.
First of all congratulations on your sobriety 😀
I want to share part of my own story, my father is an alcoholic and although I am nearly 60, I can still feel the scars, his addiction and the behavior caused by it, left in my mind. Children probably will not understand what is happening, but that doesn't mean, that they will not be harmed by their parent's behavior, especially if they are very young. I remember dreading when my father came home, not knowing which one would arrive. So thank you in the name of your daughter that you got help and quit.
I wish you and your family all the best for the future.
Sorry for replying (and watching) that video so late but I knew I didnt want to watch it with the wrong mindset. While I myself was never addicted to drugs or alcohol (never tried drugs and drank only very limited amounts when a teen - didnt like the taste so I stopped) my mum was an addict when I was small. She stopped drinking when I was 6 years old but I remember her mood swings (and her violence - never really dangerous for me, but enough to _feel_ not safe with my mom) and how I learned to try to be perfect to not upset her because of that. And I remember the time after - she was at a hospital for a short amount of time and got therapy and was participating in a self-help association for alcohol addicts. It was a huge part of her life (and therefore my life too) when I grew up. That association was fine - they did side trips and had a craft room I was allowed to use too - but still her former addiction was like a ghost lingering in the shadows.
I'm happy you are sober. Happy for you, and as a daughter of a former addict, especially happy for your daughter!
Congratulations brother. Being an addict in recovery myself, I know it takes a lot of courage to be honest, let alone publicly. Great message and who knows, you may save a life today by putting out this video. Godspeed!
💪💪💪
Dude, I’m almost 5 months sober and you are kickin’ straight facts in this video. I’d love more videos like this if you made them. Of course, if you don’t, I really appreciate this one. What you said about leaving a half empty pint on the table being crazy, I’ve never related to anything more in my life. I feel like you reached out of the screen and touched me. Awesome testimony. Thanks.
Mad respect ive been sober 29 yrs and every bit of it has been one day at a time
As a soon 23 year old i'm happy that this winter i'm going to be 2 years drug free, still fighting everyday with the permanent damage it did to my brain when it comes to my memory and that the world feels like the matrix.
Congrats, dude! If your life is better being drug free, fight for that every day!
As someone who knows how addictions can alter brain chemistry, I have an amount of respect for you that I cannot put into words. Hearing you talk about how you feel when you're sober and the level of maturity you've reached already in your sobriety journey makes me so proud of you. Keep it up!
Inspirational. Alcoholism is so heavy mentally and unseen as a disease instead of a habit. Not everyone can quit cold turkey and last. There’s a whole list of factors at play. Thanks for sharing
Thank you so much for making this video. I've been struggling with alcoholism and addiction for 20 years and decided to get back into 12 step programs the a few months ago, but having a hard time sticking with it. started telling myself lately that I can do it my own way, but have already relapsed twice in the last week. This is exactly what I needed to hear.
Everyone's experience is different, but what I can say for me, is that doing it on my own just didn't work. I wanted to do it by myself for so long so I could say I was strong, and did it without any kind of program. Didn't work. I pretty much owe my sobriety to a 12 Step Program and all the people I've met along the way. It may not work for everyone, but in my experience, it works if you actually work it.
E.S.H. is something i will always stand behind. congrats my dude. right next to ya on the journey!
Be proud to tell this story bro. Easily the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
My dad was and my brother is an alcoholic it killed my dad and I haven't spoken to my brother in over 20 years because of it. I was always afraid I would become one myself and almost did, but I chose on my own to quit and haven't had even one drop in 8 years. I'm glad you shared this with us. Never stop being cool bro.
Solidarity. 15 years, 11 months, and 24 days. As you said, best decision ever.
Stay strong brother! I'm 6 years sober myself 💪🙏
Hell yeah, man, congrats!
Having been both a bartender and stagehand, I’ve seen how some people can’t stop and need all the help people offer. It’s great to hear the people around you were able to get through to you, we need more people like that!
Good video, man.
My dad was an alcoholic when I was younger. He used to hit my mum and myself so although I do drink occasionally I'm wary of it and I have no issue never doing it again mainly so that my kids never see me the way I saw him. I'm lucky in a way that my wake up call happened to someone else rather than me doing something stupid.
Sometimes that's the way it works, and good on ya for being aware!
Thank you for your story. I’m 3 days sober going on for good.
3 days is a big deal, dude! Congrats, and keep it going!
Hey man. I hope this reaches you. I personally deal with addiction in other areas of my life. I’ve dealt with it as long as I can remember. After watching this, it really inspired me to meet the addiction head on. Even though my addiction isn’t drugs and alcohol, this was still helpful. Thank you man……
-Your friendly neighborhood sound guy
Addiction comes in many forms, and regardless of what it is, it's still addiction. Just know you're not alone, and there are many people out there going through the same struggle that are always willing to help!
@@TankTheTech thanks man. I appreciate you taking the time to reply. It means a lot. Love the channel. Hopefully we’ll cross paths at a show one day. Keep doing what ya do 🤘
As a dude in recovery. I appreciate you sharing your strength, experience and hope with the greater community. Well done and appreciated brother.
Stay strong, dude!
After my brother's suicide I fell into things hard. I think I was hoping to accidently end myself. Then i found out that I was going to be a father. I think my son saved my life. I thought I was just going to be able to instantly change and just be sober. But I have realized that sobriety takes work every day. But seeing my kids grow up is worth it.
Good on ya brother, and stay strong! 💪
Unconditional love can apply to both your kids, and yourself. Seeing it that way helps a lot. Respect for wanting to be there for your children.
Man, I admire you for opening up about your struggles. That elevator analogy was spot on. The negative repercussions of substance abuse/addiction is totally unavoidable unless you put the brakes on asap. I'm in my late 30s, and like you, have dabbled in a little bit of everything since my teens. Beat an opiate addiction after a couple failed attempts, but the booze brought on the worst of consequences for me. Dismantled a relationship with a woman I love dearly, destroyed a few friendships as well...but I still didn't come face to face with my demon until I ended up in the hospital with acute pancreatitis...for the second time. Absolutely the worst pain I've ever experienced, and my ignorance led me to endure it twice. However, the second visit led to myself being diagnosed with fatty liver disease. My ultimatum was pretty straightforward, either abstain from alcohol completely or end up dying of cirrhosis. I've given my lifestyle a complete makeover, but wish I would've sooner. To anyone that took time to read this, If you're a slave to alcohol or drugs, you don't have to be. There's no shame in asking for help. A weak man reaches for the bottle, but a strong man reaches for a friend. Just do it before it's too late. Much love, Tank. You're a helluva guy🤘
You're a warrior, dude! Thank you for sharing that story with me and anyone else that can see it. 💪
Man you have no idea how crazy is destiny, I opened this video in a new tab like 10 days ago, have not opened my notebook since and have not watched it. In those 10 days, I had to quit an almost 3 year addiction of daily weed binge because of a panic attack that got so bad and intense that I legitimately thought I was going to die of a heart attack this past friday, literally thought I was gonna drop dead on the floor with no chance to ask for help. After recovering I just threw all my weed paraphernalia no bs no excuse, every single thing to the bin. Had to do it for my health.
And now, 10 days later, I'm watching you and everything here resonates, from the alcohol on an early age, quitting alcohol and change it with daily weed, my SO ended our relationship, her not being able to tell when I'm stoned or not, wake and baking, so much dumb shit. Thank you for this video, it is helping, I hope I can make it
Man I'm so glad prescription pills weren't a thing back when I was being wild. Good for you getting it together man.
I appreciate your story man. I went from being a polyaddict for years to being an opiate addict. I owe a lot of ammends myself. But I've been clean for 8 years. Congratulations to you, glad it didn't take the bottom for you to deal with your incessant itch.
Congrats on 8 years, dude!
I've been sober for 10 years. A lot of my background is similar to yours. I'm glad you made this video. I don't agree with you that people can be alright with alcohol. I once read a book that said a person's first drink is their first step toward alcoholism. Some people just get there more slowly. Alcohol is poison and it's sold to us as fun. I've found that I can't go out and be around drunk people. Two drinks in they're on their way to a trip I'm not taking with them, so I don't go to bars at all anymore. Part of drinking for me was to help with social anxiety and my anxiety and depression have actually been a lot worse in the 10 years since I quit. I'm on more meds and I generally feel a lot worse more often. But I would never drink again. I would never let something have that power over me, to destroy my life. Keep on truckin'.
Congrats on your 10 years, and thanks for sharing, man! While I do agree that a person's first drink is their first step towards alcoholism, some people just have it together. I've known many people that can have one (like just enjoying a coke or something) and then stop and they're fine. Now, I'm in no position to say if someone is an alcoholic or not, but I think it's safe to say that both of us from our experience of sobriety can usually spot one out and there's no question to US whether they are or aren't. But nobody goes to get help unless they truly want to, and unfortunately, some people never do.
@@TankTheTech The really dangerous thing about alcohol is it let's people who want to believe a story about themselves the ability to believe that story. So if someone doesn't see they're an alcoholic they'll never admit it. Addicts often have narcissistic tendencies and a really messed up view of their world and their importance in it. The hardest thing I've had to do is let go of grandiose ideas of who I am and try to carve out a more "right sized" life. So I make UA-cam videos for a living. Because of course I do.
1 is to many and 1000 is not enough. You are never alone my friend.
Thanks for sharing that man. We struggle, but we prevail. It's been 3 and a half years for me, and I see myself in some parts of your speech. Our monsters are lurking, silently waiting. It's our job to live strong and happy so they may not wake up. :D
When you said "People say just have one or two" I was in the same mindset as you... I just can't... impossible. People would have to hide the alcohol from me and then it would get me so pissed and I would go on a rampage.... I really love that you put out this video and IT COULD not be any better timing... holy shit Much love
Hit me up whenever you want to, man! Much love, brother!
I'm the same way. Obsessive and competitive with an addictive personality. I cannot not start that train either because once I have one or two, I'll very likely find myself at the bottom of a a bottle of New Amsterdam before the sun comes up.
I am 10 years sober one day at a time and one decision at a time -- I am still playing music, surrounded by it all the time -- the only way it works is if you change on the inside -- people will try to pull you in -- when its over, its over - I am grateful everyday that I am sober. Once you see and realize the full possibilities of your poor decisions and selfish actions, and how much is at stake, how much can be lost -- you change internally. I am proud of you for making change, and proud of you for being open - its not easy - hang in there brother!
Awesome work, my friend! Stay strong out there! 💪
@@TankTheTech I love your channel.... I'm a musician that secretly wants to be a sound guy or a tech... I love that shit and that's why I watch you, your a wealthy of knowledge and just a fun guy to watch !!!! On a serious note - everytime I think about how my kids and wife do not have to worry whether or not I'll follow through with what I say I'm gonna do, or be worried about me getting thrown in jail or vanishing..... And are able to focus and love their own lives, knowing I will always be coherent and present, to support them..... That gives me the only I high I need... The juice to say sober and live the good life!!!
I believe in you brother!!! I know you got this..... One day, 10 sober years will have passed and you'll be looking back.....and you'll be so glad you have a mountain of great memories......
Partys in small town‘s was extrem. Drug‘s make Crazy and Problem with jobs, Friends etc.
Man! Nearly My exact story! (Professional musician) You are so incredibly generous to open Yourself up about this! This video is going to help countless others! Thank You!
This video deserves to be seen...here my contribution.
Mad respect man...takes guts to not just self reflect like this but come out about it.😁👍
Thank you!
@@TankTheTech I work with someone that has made a similar decision in his life, but way way too late. He is 50 now...and basically lost more than half of that years to alcohol and drugs.
I can relate to your story particularly well because of him. He wasn't as strong as you...he spent 12 years in rehab before he reached the same level.
But at one point he asked for that help...and it turned around his life. Has a job now, a beautiful partner, a roof over his head and a cat.😆👍
Congratulations on your sobriety , keep fighting the good fight
Thank you. I've been sober for years but I'm struggling with a couple people I care deeply about. I hit that bottom floor before I got off the elevator. I now sit here watching a relative and a friend both getting on and off the ride. I've already sent them this. It's a resource. Thank you.
For anyone else struggling. There are a thousand ways this works. Try all of them if you have to. For me it was "retiring". I finished drinking. That job was done. I kicked it's ass. I was a world class drinker. Nothing else to do. I retired from it. I drank all my drink tickets and anyone else's i could. For some reason I couldn't ever wrap my head around "recovery" or "resisting". It wasn't until I listened to Carr's book about smoking that I realized I had what it took. I was an asshole and I made the fucking rules. I didn't have to resist anymore. I could treat it like anything else I "used" to do. I retired as a hall of fame drunk. It's was the same as "I used to be in 3rd grade then I moved on to the 4th and kept going". Same here. Resisting never worked for me.
the fact you're talking about this topic so openly shows a lot in itself, I know a few people who really struggle even talking about that part in their life so the fact you can do it AND put it out on the internet makes the respect I have for you grow even more
and not like you need anyone telling you this, but you have an amazing wife for sticking with you through all of this too!
I totally get it. I have little doubt that my dream of being a professional musician would likely have taken my life if it had come true. I have been clean and sober since 12/18/93. My son is almost 34 and he has absolutely no memory of me being a drunk. Life is good.
Good on ya, man!
@@TankTheTech Thanks!!!
Years ago 1970 there was a dutch song called De Fles ( the Bottle) It was later recoded by 2 dutch singers , one nicked name the rock & role Junky Herman Brood ( with international hits like saturday night )a notorious drug and liquer user , and a folk singer that liked beer a bit to much Andre Hazes. (singing a genre not unlike country and western but called songs of life ) The song de fles was actualy quite fitting for their life stile . The sad part is both died unexpetced Andre hazes just died with out warning and Herman Brood had used so much drugs and Hard liquer he couldnt even get drunk any more but needed it to just stay alive. . he actualy orderd a drink at a bar in the hotel he was staying he told the bartender to bill it to his room and went to the roof of the hotel and jumped of it.
The Bottle Lyrics
The bottle, played a big role
In all, my sad existence
Because I never got no love
Did I go to the bottle
my faithful friend
You've been donating ever since
Me many, life lesson
I laughed and wept
At the old faithful bottle
If I succumb to the drink
If I go to the thunder
Then let it adorn my tombstone
He couldn't stand on his feet anymore
If I succumb to the drink
If I go to the thunder
Then show it on my tombstone
He couldn't stand on his feet anymore
And if I'm off
Sampled wax
Then my first course was
To the girl
What I loved so much
All my life
And when someone else looked at her
Then my knife flickered
Then I turned around, my nose turned pale
If I succumb to the drink
If I go to the thunder
Then let it adorn my tombstone
He couldn't stand on his feet anymore
If I succumb to the drink
If I go to the thunder
Then show it on my tombstone
He couldn't stand on his feet anymore
And if I was at night, on the ocean
When the storm wind roars
Standing drunk on the foreshore
The bottle is still half full
And then signal our wireless operator the emergency signal
SOS
Then my last greeting goes to shore
Stung in a bottle
If I succumb to the drink
If I go to the thunder
Then let it adorn my tombstone
He couldn't stand on his feet anymore
If I succumb to the drink
If I go to the thunder
Then show it on my tombstone
He couldn't stand on his feet anymore
Thanks for telling your story! I'm almost 4 years myself, it's hard to do it in the music business. I'm in it as well- nicely done-
Congrats, man!
Thank you for sharing your story!
I got sober last year because I knew will be a dad this year and it was one of the best decisions of my life! Life has been great without abusing substances and I think it really
helps me with being a better dad, husband and friend.
I recently saw my first video of one of your electric callboy reactions and really liked your energy and charisma, this video covinced me to subscribe. Thank you for the great content!
Thanks for sharing Tank! My brother going to rehab and getting sober made me take a long hard look in the mirror and realize I was on the same damn path he was, I just hadn’t hit the bottom yet. Thank god I was able to see that and hop off the elevator as you said. It’s great to see people change their lives for the better. I don’t know you man, but I’m fucking proud of you. Keep up the great work brother.
I want to add this if I may.. 4 years ago I lost my baby sister at the young age of 53, that was probably the biggest test in my life to date of my sobriety.
Up until the day of her passing I mentally had everything "under control"...
I came VEEEEEEEERY close to falling..
BUT.. with the help of my beautiful wife and my siblings, and me forcing myself NOT to cave... I made it through not only that day but to this moment in time.
Like I said in my previous post, 20 years now... and life... is indeed.. BEAUTIFUL!!!!
Stay strong brother and enjoy all the things through clear eyes, mind and soul...
Good job, buddy.....
Booze sober, going on 2 years myself..April 6th 2020... never messed with street drugs....
Hell yeah, man! Keep it up!
Congratulations and massive respect for doing this! I’ve been in recovery since february 14 2013 and life is just getting better.
Greetings from Gothenburg, Sweden🤘🏼
Awesome job, my dude! Keep it up and you'll be celebrating 10 years in no time!
Oh man, ginormous respect to you for doing this. The amount of courage it must take to come clean in front of the world. Really proud of you man!
Thank you man. I'm not well speeched enough to put in words how much this helps me personally but you are a fkn HERO.
Thank you
This video showed up randomly. Thanks for posting this.
hey dude. I don't know you but I'm proud of you for quitting. Thank you for sharing this story. I myself have been sober for just shy of 7 years now and my life has changed so much and I have never been better. Not everyone needs to be sober but it really helps to share with the world that for some (and probably a lot more people than like to admit it to themselves) it is just THAT much better to stay sober.
Fuck yeah, dude! Congrats on your time and thank you for sharing that!