Getting An Attorney - Guardianship and Disabled Adult Children

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  • Опубліковано 27 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 671

  • @vividdawn913
    @vividdawn913 Рік тому +155

    Be prepared for some places to still not respect it. My sister has Power Of Attorney for me, because I'm bed bound. She's tried going to the bank to handle my account a couple times, and they wouldn't let her. Kept insisting I come do it. So finally I loaded up my wheelchair and ventilator, and went.
    THEN they said "Oh, you can just do this online".
    Why didn't they tell HER that??
    😠

    • @vividdawn913
      @vividdawn913 Рік тому +8

      @@deassfgh7807 I agree with you, buuut.... this was in person, at the local branch! They tried to tell her they needed their legal team to look it over first, despite the fact it was signed and notarized by my attorney!
      The whole point of having a POA is to reduce hassle, not get more. Otherwise, why bother with it at all?

    • @darlenegeloso3164
      @darlenegeloso3164 Рік тому +2

      Yes, a friend of mine in NY State has the same issue with the bank

    • @buckeyehockey1979
      @buckeyehockey1979 Рік тому +4

      Guardianship and POA are very different. A POA is you authorizing someone to act on your behalf. Guardianship basically treats the person as a minor. They do not have the mental capacity to make decisions for themselves.

    • @MariaAgnesQuinn
      @MariaAgnesQuinn Рік тому

      I’m bedbound in the Scotland and will become unable to speak when overwhelmed.
      I’m not allowed a power of attorney over me.
      The laws are wild and so unbelievably varied even within small regions.

    • @Lady.Tijuri
      @Lady.Tijuri Рік тому

      yes, I had to do this for my husband bc we bank at different facilities. His bank had me jumping through hoops, idk if they got tired of seeing me & finally gave up but it took 3 months b4 they released his account to me & now I'm trying to handle his, mine, & all of our kids finances 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

  • @chickapeas5646
    @chickapeas5646 Рік тому +56

    This made me cry! We have a few years but, I get it! Not exactly what we dream of for our kid. Lord, please protect our precious ones. Whatever happens in this country, please protect our most vulnerable.

  • @deanawells4395
    @deanawells4395 Рік тому +170

    Sad and very necessary steps to ensure that your child is taken care of and their future is secure.

    • @patiencebrooke6908
      @patiencebrooke6908 Рік тому +5

      My son is 22, non verbal and completely dependent on me for everything. I will never have the money to do this for him. Legal aid was of no help, they want $400 just to start, was told other fees would be added. I can't do it 😢

    • @deanawells4395
      @deanawells4395 Рік тому +7

      @@patiencebrooke6908 it should be free to obtain these very necessary documents. Write a letter to your Senator or council members maybe they know of a grant or program that is available. Best of luck to you.

    • @Goldenbudgetsavings2
      @Goldenbudgetsavings2 Рік тому +2

      Fowler autism I didn’t think she was 18 already. That shows you are having been on UA-cam lately. Congratulations.

    • @MarsHouse6166
      @MarsHouse6166 Рік тому +4

      It shouldn't cost any parent that has raised their child safely and responsiblely the last 18 plus years,...Imo that's outrageous!

    • @deanawells4395
      @deanawells4395 Рік тому

      @@MarsHouse6166 💯 agree. I don’t know state to state what is in place to protect children/young adults with these essential documents. I hope your local government has some guidance on assistance.

  • @leadurso4221
    @leadurso4221 Рік тому +3

    Aw hate seeing dad cry! U guys are the BEST PARENTS EVER! Doing this for abigail shows how much u care! She’s is a lucky girl to have u both! And big bro too!

  • @Kicodesigns
    @Kicodesigns Рік тому +24

    I became my son’s guardian and conservator two years ago. Our court preceding was so loving and caring. Our attorneys (mine and my son) and the judge gave us extra time. It was a quiet environment. We renew paperwork annually. My son is more dependent than your daughter. For this reason our process was not as conflicting in emotions. Thank you for sharing. Keep strong! ❤

    • @mermaid1717
      @mermaid1717 Рік тому +5

      Wow.. this is so weird. In NC it's SUPER easy to do the guardianship for EC individuals. The attorney comes to the school to view the child & sees they are in need of guardianship. I was their for my nephew's & other students I work with at the same school.

    • @cjdrust
      @cjdrust Рік тому +2

      My sister is 39 Andy functions as a 2-3 year old. Both my parents have now passed and never did this like I tried to get them to die to how expensive it was and not able to afford it. Luckily I’ve been able to consent for her surgeries and make her decisions. I’ve looked into it and it’s $5000-$7000 here in Texas. I’m disabled due to chronic pain so my income is limited but I desperately have tried to get this done for both my sister and brother as both are special needs!! I just don’t have $10,000-$14,000+ to do this. Legal aid here has been no help!!
      The system is definitely broken. Wouldn’t a family member be better to be involved?? Absolutely heartbreaking.

    • @mermaid1717
      @mermaid1717 Рік тому +2

      @cjdrust I hate hearing that. I'm guessing your sister has benefits & Medicaid? Here in North Carolina, the guardianship is free because of benefits.

    • @cjdrust
      @cjdrust Рік тому +1

      @@mermaid1717 yes she has Medicaid and Medicare but here in Texas they don’t help evidently.

    • @mermaid1717
      @mermaid1717 Рік тому +2

      @cjdrust do you siblings receive other benefits? Do they have workers or get hours like community based or respite? Or is it possible for you yo become their foster mother?

  • @aliciastrom2525
    @aliciastrom2525 Рік тому +51

    As a paralegal (non attorney) having done conservatorships for 30 plus years now (in California it’s conservatorship if adult guardianship is for custody of minor children not your own) I think the hardest part is making the decision to do it. Here in CA many take the advice of their local regional center. It’s a lot of paperwork but doesn’t have to costs thousands of dollars (we charge $400-$600 to do just the paperwork). These special needs families work so hard and have so many worries and should not have to worry about coming up with thousands of dollars to get this done. Also Al least in CA lots of county Legal Aide offices or court self help centers will help and do paperwork for free. I don’t think any court could require an attorney but I could be wrong

  • @Lucailey
    @Lucailey Рік тому +167

    it's crazy for me to think that Abbie is 18 now! Where did the time go!?

    • @ameliafoley9569
      @ameliafoley9569 Рік тому +8

      I started watching when my son was small and now he’s 7! Crazy how kids grow up so dang fast 😢❤

    • @invalidusername883
      @invalidusername883 Рік тому +3

      I was shocked! I was thinking she was 15-16

  • @Kaybuxx
    @Kaybuxx Рік тому +38

    Congrats on the guardianship, you guys are great parents and have so much strength. 🎉

  • @amymartin6241
    @amymartin6241 Рік тому +1

    Thank you for making videos like this. We are still at age 9 with our son, but it is so helpful to bring attention to subjects like this. I have been watching your videos for about 5 years, and your family is in my prayers. Thank you❤

  • @barbaradoye1989
    @barbaradoye1989 Рік тому +10

    I think this is one of the most important videos you have ever done. Thank you for sharing such a private and emotional subject. You two are so brave and awesome! You are really providing such a great service to our community by providing such a superb example. Thank you. Take care!

  • @mylifepostpain3705
    @mylifepostpain3705 Рік тому +1

    You two are amazing parents. Regardless of what anyone says BOTH of your kids are so lucky to have you!

  • @wincharles1195
    @wincharles1195 Рік тому +18

    I have already done this, but it’s nice to see that it’s out there for public knowledge

    • @24kradio
      @24kradio Рік тому +1

      That was actually scary being as she didn't have her communication device to say yes or no.

  • @carmenmarialinne2650
    @carmenmarialinne2650 Рік тому +87

    Other people will eventually make all the decisions for Abigail: at the point parents die or are no longer able to be guardians any longer . The path leading to that eventuality would of course be difficult-- but also the “Greatest Exhibit of Love”… for the rest of her life… even making all arrangements for her Final Service and Resting place. Love is NOT Easy.

    • @chronischgeheilt
      @chronischgeheilt Рік тому

      Autists are Not incapable of making their own decisions. Some of them Just can Not appropriately Take Care of themselves. They still have opinions and thoughts - some of them Just can Not weigh everything in together or have the correct preparation for everything. So the understanding HAS to be "Double checking decisions" and "navigating Tasks that can't be self navigated" instead of simply "making all decisions". That's horrendous and Strips a disabled person of all the autonomy they are entitled to.

    • @sabrinamiller4405
      @sabrinamiller4405 Рік тому +1

      Isaiah is going to do a wonderful job with his sister when the time comes.

    • @Libertaro-i2u
      @Libertaro-i2u 4 місяці тому

      Guardianship can be a tough choice to make.

  • @jessiec1194
    @jessiec1194 Рік тому +1

    I really appreciate that you share all this. It’s so much to have to do and think about.

  • @sandramcglinchey7712
    @sandramcglinchey7712 Рік тому +139

    We did this an year ago. Our lawyer has a autistic daughter. We have figured out it all!

    • @ThePinkfluf
      @ThePinkfluf Рік тому +5

      We need to do this. In uk soon for our son ! I presume it’s similar process I must find out. Great vid thanks

    • @noellewinans5778
      @noellewinans5778 Рік тому +6

      You guys are one of my heroes. Are used to have a guardianship. I finally got where I don’t need one anymore. I also know the court hearings can be hard. When I was watching this video, I kind of cried a little because I went through that I really think you guys are awesome. I remember having a lady come out to my house being my representative. I’m sorry, but I’m not either cause you got a great kid to Great kids actually. you are a great parents you’re understanding parents. I am so proud to watch her UA-cam channel every day. I have autism as well. I also have schizophrenia and cerebral palsy. I have it very mild in. My body thing is a Segoe Police all through my body not just want her to my body, you guys always make my day with your videos. Tell Abigail a.k.a. Miss Abby she’s is so funny, so sweet and so kind I pray that the court stuff goes well for you. You’re doing the right thing for her. I know when I had my guardianship it kept me safe and out of trouble last year I was able to get off my guardianship. I still have mental health and autism. I’ll pray for you guys no matter what you’re my heroes. I hope you read this. Love you guys.

  • @TN-rf7nt
    @TN-rf7nt Рік тому +5

    Thank you for sharing your journey with those of us who may have to follow the same path as you eventually. Your family is a blessing and I love how loving you are to your beautiful daughter.

  • @BlazingSadles
    @BlazingSadles Рік тому +1

    Y'all are wonderful parents. And your home is beautiful!

  • @lucyd007
    @lucyd007 Рік тому +25

    You guys are amazing parents. This world needs more parents like you.

  • @heatherlong1163
    @heatherlong1163 5 місяців тому

    Thank u for sharing your journey with Abby. U guys are amazing. We are going through the same process with our almost 18 year old.

  • @jnniferhoffman8298
    @jnniferhoffman8298 Рік тому

    I really appreciate that you guys are taking the time to plan ahead that's very important to ensure that that your child will be well taken care of when you guys are not here anymore not anything you want to think about planning ahead it's a really smart thing to do

  • @lindalawrence8253
    @lindalawrence8253 Рік тому +18

    You 2 are fabulous. We need more people like the 2 of you.

  • @cynthiasmith8811
    @cynthiasmith8811 Рік тому +30

    Went through this process with my special needs daughter two years ago. It's a very emotional process. Ours was handled over zoom during COVID instead of the court room. Lots of paperwork, extended family interviews and even the sheriff coming by the house to serve our daughter papers. You're great parents and only doing what is best for Abby. In NC my husband and I did not need an attorney.

    • @bonniemandly1815
      @bonniemandly1815 Рік тому +2

      You guys are terrific parents! I respect all of your efforts to give Abbie as full a life as possible!

  • @marionmeister4268
    @marionmeister4268 Рік тому +3

    Thank you for this video. I have a 3y old son with disabilities and never even thought about this topic... now I know, this is sth. that will come up if he makes it till adulthood. Really appreciate your advocating.

    • @bliaher9839
      @bliaher9839 6 місяців тому

      Your son is still young. Please do not file petition for Limited Conservatorship when he turns 18. Keep your son safe. Regional Center and their vendors, the courts...they're human traffickers, they legally kidnapped adult child and exploit them for profit. Last year DDS reported $12 billion spent on supports and services. They will come after your child so they can redirect funding for services back into their own pockets. The Price of Care.

  • @queenelizabeth4242
    @queenelizabeth4242 Рік тому +2

    I can't imagine. Yall are great parents!!!

  • @RubeeRoja
    @RubeeRoja Рік тому +55

    My son is 17 and I just don't feel ready for this. In fact I almost didn't even think about this necessity until it occurred to me while I was laying down for bed one night. I did a webinar with one of our parent groups online and I just feel extremely intimidated by the whole process. Thank you for talking about it and always being so open in your journey!
    It just really goes into my aching fear of what will happen to my son when I'm no longer here on earth. He'll have a long life after me and I'm terrified of him being alone.😢

    • @stacyrae3048
      @stacyrae3048 Рік тому +14

      I have the same fear and it’s my biggest worry. I’m a single mom and she’s my only child. Hugs ❤ i know and you aren’t alone

    • @fatheringautism
      @fatheringautism  Рік тому +18

      Not knowing is the scariest part. Reach out to any local resources for information, talk to an attorney, and just get the ball rolling. We really didn’t have to do very much other than sign papers and talk a little. Everyone involved is there for your child and their well-being.

    • @RubeeRoja
      @RubeeRoja Рік тому +2

      @@fatheringautism That is sound advice. Thank you!

    • @RubeeRoja
      @RubeeRoja Рік тому +3

      @@stacyrae3048 I can relate to you so well. Yes, we are not alone, though sometimes it can feel like we're on a boat with just two people in it.

    • @lunamia__09ram
      @lunamia__09ram Рік тому +3

      My son is 13 ... with special needs. All of this is new for Me... I'm 34. He's my only child. And this is great amazing info... I will have 2 look more into this or find and attorney... he is not om disabilities ...but does have an i.e.p diagnosis. . Never got info or new My son can receive so much: that he doesn't get now. Or I never had any idea he could.

  • @rosemaryshulman7503
    @rosemaryshulman7503 Рік тому +31

    I completed the guardianship process 2 years ago in St John’s County. I was referred to The ARC of Jacksonville. They provide referrals to attorneys that will file the paperwork at a reduced cost. The court in my county assigned my daughter’s attorney. My attorney assists me with the yearly paperwork also. On the ARC’s website click Family Resources. It is the last listing. This should help families in your general area. So glad you covered this process.

    • @mermaid1717
      @mermaid1717 Рік тому +1

      In North Carolina, this process is free for EC individuals. It's all part of their benefits.

    • @Libertaro-i2u
      @Libertaro-i2u 4 місяці тому

      The ARC also does a whole array of services for the intellectually and developmentally disabled.

  • @rebekahduke4439
    @rebekahduke4439 Рік тому +2

    We did this twice with my mom. The fist time was when my grandmother adopted me she also took guardianship of my mom. Who is special needs. Then we did again 2 years ago when my uncle took over as power of attorney for my grandmother and guardianship for my mom. Its tough to do but I'm so grateful for his help.

  • @angelalejzerowicz9670
    @angelalejzerowicz9670 Рік тому

    You 2 are doing way better than just ok!! You are phenomenal parents 🥰

  • @Kimberly34584
    @Kimberly34584 Рік тому +10

    Congrats! As difficult as this step was and will continue to be, I hope you can find contentment in knowing Abbie will be well cared for within out healthcare system

  • @brenale_heartsJesus
    @brenale_heartsJesus Рік тому

    Thank y’all for sharing this. I have two special needs brothers. One gave me power of attorney over him because he was able to speak for himself, but my other brother is nonverbal and May need to go down the guardianship road. I heard how tasking it is but necessary in certain situations. This helps me understand the process a bit more.

  • @kellymason4015
    @kellymason4015 Рік тому +6

    A big huge step! There are a lot of parents who don’t do this! I am the guardian of my brother and will be until I can’t do it anymore or he passes.
    I’m glad you are capturing this process because there are a lot who don’t know. I did this for an informative speech in college.

    • @bliaher9839
      @bliaher9839 6 місяців тому

      It will be the biggest step you can't take back. Don't do it. Once you file petition, the court can take your brother away, not today, maybe not tomorrow but in a year. The Price of Care.

    • @kellymason4015
      @kellymason4015 6 місяців тому

      @@bliaher9839 it’s a bit late. I took over for my parents. He is 43 and will always need one.

  • @tinajohnson9602
    @tinajohnson9602 Рік тому +22

    You are AMAZING parents. Don't ever let anyone tell you any different.

  • @tealady4
    @tealady4 Рік тому +1

    I was so ready to be able to not have the big convos about our son. We had to get conservatorship. When the judge explained what all it meant, I could not help but cry as once again a real tangible confirmation that our newborn dreams for him had become so different. Things no one can explain until those feelings hit you hard.

  • @deserttamales7694
    @deserttamales7694 Рік тому

    I think y'all are doing great! Thank you for sharing your journey with us

  • @fluffy2840TTV
    @fluffy2840TTV Рік тому +2

    As a high-functioning autistc adult who is currently a Junior in College, right before starting my freshman year my family took me through medical power of attorney. I'm still not to use to it as even though I was TOLD that the medical power of attorney is only for when I'm not mentally able to make decisions. But my mother still decided that she wants to sign for me no matter what is asked of my signature. I know it's hard to see your child loose some of their independence through this, but based on my expience, I believe your doing the right thing

  • @GrannyHugs
    @GrannyHugs Рік тому +1

    You both are awesome parents!❤ I have watched your videos for a few yrs now & never doubted either of your parenting skills! Abby is happy & adjusted. Yes, guardianship documents & procezs can be nerve wracking but you are dping the bestfor your daughter to ensure her care later on as a grown up. I have learned so much about parenting a child with special needs from both of you!
    Virtual hugs to you both & Abby.🤗🤗🤗❤

  • @heidibaltom8138
    @heidibaltom8138 Рік тому +2

    You are the best parents anyone could ask for ❤

  • @beckypeak9373
    @beckypeak9373 Рік тому +5

    Oh my goodness when Mom told Dad not to cry, I lost it, I did not know this was an issue, I have custody of my grandson and have not been told this. But thanks for the info.

  • @shirleygiordano7627
    @shirleygiordano7627 Рік тому +1

    You guys are great parents. I have great parents too. They are also getting old. I wish I had someone to take care of me when my parents pass. My parents are in their 70s. I can't drive, work, or have my bank card, many other things. Mom and dad are getting old. I'm scared. Who is going to take care of me? I write well, but life skills aren't my thing. If anybody knows anything out there to help me, please let me know.

  • @jessicapadron7886
    @jessicapadron7886 Рік тому

    My son is 6 nonverbal autistic this is very useful in case we end up needing this. Thank you.

  • @CrazyCatzMom
    @CrazyCatzMom Рік тому

    I'll definitly share this with my daughter cause my grandson was just recently diagnosed as a high functioning autistic child

  • @miss.campbell1103
    @miss.campbell1103 Рік тому +27

    Asa-as a teacher who works with IEPs all the time, what you said about the legal jargon was great. The legal information/language in an IEP is not considering your emotions either-it’s a great way to describe it and I think something that will help parents understand too.

    • @kristicollett7887
      @kristicollett7887 Рік тому +2

      Yes! My son only "qualifies" for a 504... but the wording and the way everyone speaks can be very hard to hear and read.

  • @spaceyjacey_
    @spaceyjacey_ Рік тому +3

    I CANNOT believe she’s 18. It flew by. I remember finding you guys when she was 15. So crazy! I’m sorry you guys have to do this to take care of your OWN daughter

  • @genaeller6914
    @genaeller6914 Рік тому +3

    Wow! I didn't know a lot of these details about guardianship. I chose not to do guardianship for my child. We decided to do a legal supported decision making agreement document. Very interesting. Thanks for sharing your journey! I am so happy your overall experience went well! Congratulations!

    • @bliaher9839
      @bliaher9839 6 місяців тому

      And don't do Limited Conservatorship. Do not give your child's right over to the court.

    • @reddragonscoolkids9968
      @reddragonscoolkids9968 2 місяці тому

      Is your child able to sang paper work mine does not but I really just want a power of attorney but he can’t

  • @taffinerbutler9139
    @taffinerbutler9139 Рік тому

    Thanks for sharing. My best friend son has Autism and she going through the process now!

  • @Juicybaby196
    @Juicybaby196 Рік тому

    You guys are awesome parents you always explain things it’s great my nephew is high functioning autistic so I like learning things from you thank you 🥰

  • @Mazy800
    @Mazy800 Рік тому

    you guys are the best parents. you'd do anything for ab❤️ i've been watching you guys for a few years now. so happy to have found you!

  • @junegroves7295
    @junegroves7295 Рік тому +38

    Thank you! I'm starting the process now! I have a consultation call with an attorney tomorrow, but definitely need to look into financial help!🥰 Have a great Wednesday everyone!!🧡🧡

    • @candyhinton5822
      @candyhinton5822 Рік тому +7

      We did this about 15yrs ago
      The part of it I don't like is doing the yearly report.We also had to do a Rodgers report every year for her medication.

  • @bernardarivera7820
    @bernardarivera7820 Рік тому +1

    Yes, in New York this exam rooms and apply for people with disabilities

  • @kingthistledad1594
    @kingthistledad1594 Рік тому

    Thank you for showing process really nice to see

  • @LPSbeautifulpalsy
    @LPSbeautifulpalsy Рік тому +1

    I just wanted to point out that Guardianship also applies to someone who has an traumatic brain injuries and can’t make financial and medical decisions. I have one. While I hated it at first and claimed it as a curse, I later realized it’s a blessing in disguise!

  • @joianne7511
    @joianne7511 Рік тому

    I am going through Guardianship now. August 3 is my appointment and I live in Ohio so far they did not tell me I need a attorney, but this helps a lot little scary because I don’t want to take away his independence to do whatever he want. I know I’m just helping But it’s a little harder than I thought it would be. I do understand that he does need the help so I most definitely will always be there for him. Thank you for making this video because it did put me at ease a little.

  • @kathleenkuss8583
    @kathleenkuss8583 Рік тому +7

    You are amazing parents. Abbie is blessed ❤

  • @ritawood2202
    @ritawood2202 Рік тому +1

    Such a very raw subject. My son just turned 18 and we had to do this too 😢

  • @meletajackson5757
    @meletajackson5757 Рік тому

    Thank you so much for the information. We live in Florida and will be needing to do something similar to this in the next few years with my oldest son.

  • @christenneson8162
    @christenneson8162 Рік тому

    Been here,done that, and continue to. Best for them only thing that matters.

  • @Mrsmadison45
    @Mrsmadison45 Рік тому +1

    We totally understand how you feel, because of the courts and lawyers . ❤

  • @gymblondie
    @gymblondie Рік тому

    that teal wall behind you two is really really pretty!!!

  • @dawnl.7792
    @dawnl.7792 Рік тому +10

    My friends just went through all of this for their son. Very interesting to hear the whole process from you guys. Thanks. I feel like I can better understand what my friend went through now that I've watched this video. Thanks, once again, for educating me. Love y'all 💞

    • @bliaher9839
      @bliaher9839 6 місяців тому +1

      Tell your friend about the Price of Care. Parents have had their adult child legally kidnapped by the State. Regional Centers and their vendors will falsely accuse family of abuse to gain control of funding for services so they can redirect monies back into their own pockets. It's a multi-billion human trafficking crime happening in California. Please help bring awareness and keep our children safe.

  • @ceruediggsopaigbeogu4407
    @ceruediggsopaigbeogu4407 Рік тому +1

    Thank you for posting this. Ours Is about to turn 18 in 2024.

    • @JosephPeralta-p2v
      @JosephPeralta-p2v 5 місяців тому

      Mine to and I’m so scared you never know with this government

  • @teridoster5840
    @teridoster5840 Рік тому +2

    A really messed up thing that happens a lot of the time in similar situations, is what my mother had to go thru with my sister (born microcephalic & has CP w/ toddler level intellect) when she reached 18 (in order to be able to continue being paid by the state to stay home and care for her 24/7 instead of having to put her in a care home, bcuz the state does not pay outside help enough to come in as in-home care while my mom would be working) so she had to go to court to basically make her a ward of the state, which was heartbreaking for my mom. She’s my 1/2 sister & her father is not in the picture (he committed suicide when she was 12), so she only really had my mom. It’s just terrible that they’ll pay for her to go live in some random care home where no one loves or really truly cares about her or her well being, instead of paying a well trained person to come into my mom’s home like 10 hrs a day 5 days a week so my mom could continue working, basically forcing her to live in poverty, just to be able to keep my sister at home with her. Personally I think it’s disgraceful.

    • @cjdrust
      @cjdrust Рік тому

      I feel this 100%. I live in Texas and they practically forced us to put my sister at 39 in a nursing home wanted group home but I fought it. But my parents have now passed so I’m the v one making decisions for her and my other special needs brother; luckily I’ve been able to do this without guardianship or conservatorship so far. I’ve looked into it but it’s $5000-7000 each!!

    • @mysterybradford5592
      @mysterybradford5592 Рік тому

      Thats sad

  • @auntpeggymcdonell
    @auntpeggymcdonell Рік тому +26

    I had to go through a similar situation. After my parents passed away I had to take over guardianship of my sister. I had to go through a judge never in court.

  • @calebhernandez187
    @calebhernandez187 Рік тому +1

    Honestly I think I know why I love children so much,I think I’m supposed to be helping them in some way

  • @stephaniegidner
    @stephaniegidner Рік тому

    Thank you for sharing. My daughter is autistic and we’ll be going through this as well in a few years.

  • @sandig887
    @sandig887 Рік тому

    I just got guardianship of my 15yr old grandson. He is special needs. I live in Michigan and hired an attorney by choice $1675 . I will be investigating when for when he turns 18yrs. Tx u!!

  • @GalaNewsNetwork
    @GalaNewsNetwork Рік тому +2

    We’re going to have to do this soon with our autistic teen. 💚🖤💜

  • @CB-rh7gv
    @CB-rh7gv Рік тому +22

    This is such a huge deal! Full guardianship is for very few people. Every person should be considered individually, regardless of disability! If a person is able to communicate their ideas/needs through oral, written, sign, communication device, or picture symbols, coherently, regularly, and appropriately they should NOT be losing their all rights. Their are different pathways to meet different needs. I agree Abbie’s parents are her best guardians. I just want to make clear guardianship needs should be considered individually.

    • @Jessica-gk5tt
      @Jessica-gk5tt Рік тому +1

      They are what are you going on about

    • @CB-rh7gv
      @CB-rh7gv Рік тому +7

      I did say Abbie’s parents are doing what is best for Abbie. I’m simply adding to an important video that is watched by many others with family members with significant disabilities. It is wonderful this family is sharing their experience with it. Have a nice day!

  • @leowidows
    @leowidows Рік тому +1

    lol at the end when y'all are talking abbie in the back is cracking me up. "HELLO? is anybody gonna get me a snack or what?" same girl, same

  • @abbystephens9766
    @abbystephens9766 Рік тому +2

    I am so glad I don’t have to do this. I have autism but I am very high functioning and can do things like drive and take care of myself. I have the privilege of being able to vote and having my rights.

  • @thegalafam
    @thegalafam Рік тому +1

    Our Emma likes to talk about “the people” too. So cute.

  • @pacificbug
    @pacificbug Рік тому

    I'm on the board of the Arc of Snohomish County in Washington State. They're so helpful for families with special needs kids and adults with developmental disabilities.

  • @tinahengen3168
    @tinahengen3168 Рік тому

    Thanks for this information I’m going to be facing this very soon, you gave some great advice, and very helpful information, thank you!

  • @dawnyofthelight
    @dawnyofthelight Рік тому +50

    My adoptive parents had to go through this when I was about Abby's age. And my husband had to do this to take over the Guardianship and representative payee thing for me. It was a process. I have low Spectrum verbal autism and fetal alcohol syndrome so I always have to have a guardian.

    • @ReineDeLaSeine14
      @ReineDeLaSeine14 Рік тому +11

      It’s nice that your parents decided to allow you to begin your life with your husband! Congratulations

    • @hl3818
      @hl3818 Рік тому +1

      Abbie is a beautiful person 😊😊 ..

    • @roly2452
      @roly2452 Рік тому +8

      I find it interesting that you have guardianship and are married. In USA it obviously works slightly different to here. Do you have to have a guardian purely because you have a diagnosis or purely because you have care needs? Here in the UK you don't have guardianship for those reasons, you have to prove that the person cannot make whatever decision for themselves and you have to evidence that you have tried to assist them to do so. Do you have 1 guardianship order for everything in USA? Here in the UK you have to have separate ones for finances and health so if you can prove that a person is unlikely to be able to make any finance decisions even with help you apply for that and if you can prove that a person cannot make health and welfare decisions you apply for that one. However, some people decide not to take out one for health because if there is not one the doctor can make the decision instead. If you have guardianship you have to prove you are making decisions in the person's best interest and if you are not it can be taken back to court to be revoked from you I think. The reason I find it interesting that you are married is that usually to get married in the UK you have to prove that you have capacity to make that decision and if you dont you can't get married. I don't think it comes under guardianship because it doesn't affect health or finances which are the only things we have guardianship for.

    • @maggiemccauslin1084
      @maggiemccauslin1084 Рік тому

      I'm adopted also and I too have Fetal Alcohol syndrome... not sure if I have Autism though I suspect but I don't want to just out right say I do you know?

    • @emc5292
      @emc5292 Рік тому

      ​@roly2452 I'm in Northern Ireland, and the laws are ever so slightly different to rest of UK, so this might not be quite right for where you are, but with us the mental capacity act can't interfere with someone's rights to marry, divorce or decision about fertility. I'm sure there is a legal process to ensure the vulnerable adult is not being forced, but as far as I'm aware, the human rights act (article 12) gives everyone the right to marry.

  • @KarenS-qe3ly
    @KarenS-qe3ly 7 місяців тому +1

    Thank You for this Excellent Video. I was wondering if the $5,800 was for your Lawyer as Parents, or the amount for both your Lawyer and your Child's Lawyer? How much per hour did your Attorney charge you? How much per hour did the Attorney for your Child charge you? And Thanks again for this extremely informative Video which helps reduce the stress for those of us who will be going through this Process.

  • @shaririki7343
    @shaririki7343 Рік тому +1

    No one can look after Abby like her mom and dad ❤

  • @mermaid1717
    @mermaid1717 Рік тому +1

    Every year? I know things are different state to state, but here in North Carolina it definitely was a one time only thing that did not cost any money. It's a totally free process with the individuals benefits. And Abbie obviously has benefits. Is the process not free in Florida?? And the full process in North Carolina took a month or less to do it all.

  • @leahpalacios4724
    @leahpalacios4724 Рік тому +28

    I have autism to my parents are my legally guardians they had to get a lawyer to so I can understand what you have to go through 😊

  • @tinamarie7777
    @tinamarie7777 Рік тому +4

    Such a great vlog with both solid facts and emotions! You guys rock!!! 🥰🫶☀️🫶

  • @robinmontgomery8917
    @robinmontgomery8917 Рік тому

    PRISCILLA YOU AND ASA ARE GREAT PARENTS! I enjoy your videos and you both have been great advocates for Abigail as far as I see it! I send you both BIG hugs and prayers and I hope everything goes well in court! Abigail is blessed to have such a great family and I wish nothing but the BEST for ALL of you!!!❤🙏🫂

  • @CrimeZilla
    @CrimeZilla Рік тому +11

    My son is 23 with high functioning Autism we have Guardianship and Guardian Advocacy/POA over him. It is a tough decision and my son is verbal but we explained why we needed to do it. ❤❤❤

    • @lillians5239
      @lillians5239 Рік тому +1

      When did your son became verbal my sons 3 and has Asperger’s

    • @CrimeZilla
      @CrimeZilla Рік тому

      @@lillians5239 We did sign language for 6-7 years. We did the sign for the word and spoke it to him. So, signed for Milk, then say said “Milk” he would get m out and gave it to him. Each child is different but important to encourage words and sign language to help him connect the other side of the brain.

    • @CrimeZilla
      @CrimeZilla Рік тому

      @@lillians5239 it is important if you have pictures they can visually see too. As he masters one demand then can move on.

    • @andrewmorton395
      @andrewmorton395 Рік тому +1

      Wish I had some one to help me

  • @onetoughchick78
    @onetoughchick78 Рік тому +1

    We went through this with the young man i do respite care for last spring. His mom had a lawyer advocating for her. He had his own lawyer advocating for his needs. In our case, Mom needed temporary guardianship while we waited for the final decision because he had some medical procedures that needed to be done and couldn't wait until final guardianship came through.
    For us, it also wasn't a doubt that his mom would be granted guardianship. It was just going through the process to protect his future.
    As a respite caregiver who isn't a formal part of his family, i was mostly an outside observer who occasionally offered my insights regarding him to both Mom's lawyer and his lawyer. Ya know, these are his limitations, he doesn't understand danger or have regard for what might be inappropriate. Can't dress himself or go to the bathroom unaided. Can't fix his own meals because he forgets the stove is hot. All that stuff.
    As he's gotten older, i've moved from being a full caregiver to being a friend who takes him places and helps him with the hard stuff, but he will never progress beyond where he is now. It's reality. It's a hard reality for me and his mom to face, but it is what it is.
    He'll be 19 in October and i've been working with him since he was 11. I've watched this guy grow up. I love him so much. I know he misses me if i don't show up for a few days because he generally sees me every day. He has 2, soon to be 3, younger siblings that have school and daycare and activities to go to. So I'm there almost daily. We get annoyed with each other and we have "fights" and arguments, but that's how friends are. He's a happy guy and we try our best to make sure his life is happy and as full as possible.

    • @EM-mw2qr
      @EM-mw2qr Рік тому +1

      Thank you for all you do.

    • @onetoughchick78
      @onetoughchick78 Рік тому +1

      @@EM-mw2qr i do what I can, when I can. Thankfully, it's usually enough. I love my dude and his family.

  • @hithere3951
    @hithere3951 Рік тому

    Thank you.This was very helpful. You all are the best.❤

  • @roselloyd19
    @roselloyd19 3 місяці тому

    🙏🏼THANK YOU FOR THIS INFORMATION ASA‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

  • @lizaoakes9229
    @lizaoakes9229 Рік тому

    You are great parents!!!!! You’re doing great you are doing your best!❤️❤️🤗😘😘

  • @carlapoorman8137
    @carlapoorman8137 Рік тому +1

    Our family lives in Illinois(please pray for us! Lol)and I am sure there is a bunch of "red tape " and "hurdles " our grandson's parents will have to go through. Our second grandson is autistic but highly functioning but as a legal adult(18 y o)there will be absolutely 💯 things he will need help with as living on his own, financial responsibility and decision making with all the things. He's going into 8th grade this year so I can see more and more that he will be needing a lot of help or guidance on how to do life!

  • @Washington.dc_metroaudits
    @Washington.dc_metroaudits Рік тому +11

    I’m autistic and I make all my decisions I don’t need a guardian

    • @sarahmccarthy4462
      @sarahmccarthy4462 Рік тому +1

      Your autism isn't as severe as Abbie's. I took have autism live on my own but my son who has autism will not be able to live on his own for a very long time if ever

    • @ReineDeLaSeine14
      @ReineDeLaSeine14 Рік тому +2

      I don’t have a guardian either, but I do have preferences should I ever need one. Do something called an Advance Directive along with a Living Will. Currently I make my own decisions and ask for help if I need it. I have a case manager through Medicaid, family/friends, and therapists I can ask.

    • @waffles3629
      @waffles3629 Рік тому +1

      Well you aren't Abby. She does need this.

    • @Washington.dc_metroaudits
      @Washington.dc_metroaudits Рік тому

      @@ReineDeLaSeine14 i would do something like that I’m broke though I live off my social security and I can’t afford an attorney I have my grandpa but he’s sick and not doing to well and he’s on a fixed income so I can’t ask him for help

    • @Washington.dc_metroaudits
      @Washington.dc_metroaudits Рік тому

      I also have adhd Intellectual disability ocd and Schizophrenia

  • @egyptsas3
    @egyptsas3 Рік тому

    Everyone was so helpful when I did my son's.. it did break my heart to

  • @DoctorJoanieTool
    @DoctorJoanieTool Рік тому +38

    Well as you say it should be a big deal because it’s taking away Abby’s rights as a legal adult. Thanks for this. Maybe you could do another video taking about why/what exactly it means in more detail … I know it’s a big fear for people.

    • @mermaid1717
      @mermaid1717 Рік тому +6

      Abbie isn't able to make financial or life choices. We're talking about all the big things. Like cooking or shopping by herself. Making medical decisions. Managing money, etc. Basically nothing will change in Abbie's life from what it's been the last 17 years. Her parents will still make all her big decisions & sign consent papers (medical needs) for her. And she'll live the happy healthy life she's been living. She'll also start receiving her social security check now.... if she wasn't already. That depends on how much her parents make. She's also eligible for food stamps now.

  • @diannagose625
    @diannagose625 Рік тому +5

    Will it be the same steps for Isaiah if he should have to take guardianship?

    • @marcellagamble6633
      @marcellagamble6633 Рік тому +1

      The son is in a Will, to take over

    • @brikhouse22
      @brikhouse22 Рік тому

      @@marcellagamble6633 but that doesn't negate this legal process from still needing to happen.

    • @fatheringautism
      @fatheringautism  Рік тому +3

      No, he is included in it. In the event we were to pass away he would take over the guardianship of Abigail. They would likely have a judge make that decision in the event that happens but it is already setup that way as well.

  • @sandraboose3686
    @sandraboose3686 Рік тому +29

    We went through all of this. Our son is 21 now .

    • @mermaid1717
      @mermaid1717 Рік тому +4

      My nephew is 21 also. Getting his guardianship at 18 was super easy. I'm in North Carolina.

  • @jessgarland1829
    @jessgarland1829 Рік тому +9

    U guys are great parents

  • @heathercochran6514
    @heathercochran6514 Рік тому

    FYI for Kentucky parents: I just went through this in February with my adult autistic son who was turning 18. I did not have to have an attorney but the process was as follows:
    1. File papers at circuit court for guardianship. Pay cost of filing.
    2. Court send you to 3 appointments that you pay for out of pocket no insurance accepted because it’s for legal action.
    3. See regular medical doctor.
    4. See psychiatrist and psychologist.
    5. Court sends an adult social worker to your home for meeting.
    6. Court date. ( I was not required to even bring my son to court after the doctors and social workers reports as they didn’t want to upset him). Court lasted maybe 20 minutes total. Judge approved.
    7. Paperwork came in mail a week later.
    My total cost was $630 for court filing and all doctors visits.

    • @reddragonscoolkids9968
      @reddragonscoolkids9968 5 місяців тому

      What is the medical exam they talk about ??? My son will be turning 18 this year and already filed papers with a legal help

  • @marcellagamble6633
    @marcellagamble6633 Рік тому +4

    I receive a letter from Social Security this year. Explaining, when my daughter with Autism, who is 16 now. Will need to sign forms though them, take over guardianship, before she turn 18 next year.
    I can not afford an attorney, I'm on disability myself, so my money, don't go far

  • @Baachoo143
    @Baachoo143 Рік тому +3

    As someone who works with guardians a lot as an interpreter, parents like you make it seem like she is representing herself.

  • @egyptsas3
    @egyptsas3 Рік тому

    I fortunately did not have to get a lawyer and the county clerk was so helpful with paperwork ❤

  • @pontinrob
    @pontinrob Рік тому +6

    i can relate in a way to the feeling, me and my Brother have signed paperwork basically saying we can put mum or dad in a home and have power of attorney over them, makes you realise that they are getting older and one day we may have to help them. I know its not same but I'd imagine the sadness of knowing you are having to run somrones life is similar

    • @escott696
      @escott696 Рік тому

      ​@@deassfgh7807sounds like you need social care involvement

  • @jamiefoley2668
    @jamiefoley2668 Рік тому +1

    Abby you got this Girl

  • @Chalid4Yankees
    @Chalid4Yankees Рік тому +13

    I hated this video, for a lot of the same reasons you said. It’s so said 😢, but thank you for educating us. You guys are awesome parents. This is just a continuation of what you have been doing. ❤

  • @bernardarivera7820
    @bernardarivera7820 Рік тому +1

    In New York we had the same thing as guardianship. We had the same rights like you got doing for Abigail. We have the same things but we want more out of it in case of a family.

  • @gypsydoll14
    @gypsydoll14 Рік тому

    My son is 15 and I’m not looking forward to this day but I know he needs to be protected.