Відео

let’s face it, this world wasn’t made for us. Try explaining to your boss that the corporate expectations are overwhelming you and, no, you won’t be in on your day off because your brain shuts down when its overwhelmed and your personal time is of utter importance to your mental health. To this my boss came back with, “look every employee in here is tired, but they do what they have to do. its company policy”. So there you go, it’s company policy, everyone adheres and no exceptions, they treat all employees equally. ah, how i hate the word conformity. By the way I am very good at what I did and i was clearly an asset, but corporate does not want someone that stands up for their mental health. What good are you if you can’t buck up and be a team player.

6:03 - "... during the periods when I'm getting shit done, it's not like, 'I'm fucking 'Thriving', ya know? ..." RIGHT!!

is it common to like know u feel a sense of confusion on social situations u can't put ur finger on exactly what about it is super confusing but u still kinda don't fully understand how to fit in or socialize

Topic for future video mind going blank when people ask you questions maybes? I suffer from that a lot. I feel like saying "I don't know" is embassrassing. Don't know why we are conditioned to not say "I don't know" like it is shameful or something.

As someone with AuDHD; I don't really know anything else other than confusion. Edit: Even though 'm a bit older than you, I still life with my parents as I can't understand & cope for barely a day on my own.

I’m autistic & will be 50 this year but I’m still confused.

Video request: how would you move house with all the possessions that you own?

Uhgg.....I'm just too tired to engage with neuro-typicals any more ❗🙄

Yay

When neurotypicals talk about over thinking they are unwittingly just describing how neurodivergent people think per se. They don’t get it because they typically don’t think analytically at all, they just fly on autopilot.

for me, i use the analogy of not having enough pieces of the jigsaw puzzle at any time, to see whats going on. i realized i just dont have the capacity to hold enough pieces at one time, regardless of the topic.

Not knowing what people do with their time is something I get confused about as well.

Brain fog is the worst!

Donation sent. If every one of Dana's 9000 subscribers donated *22p a month* via Ko-Fi that'd be £2,000 a month. Just saying 😉

Lots of things in society don’t actually make any sense. And you can’t make sense of things that don’t make any sense.

This is so relatable...its like a permanent state of internal debate and also not knowing how to seek clarification because the cause of the confusion itself is also unclear! also grasping at a 'conclusion' or understanding that seems to resolve a dilemma and finding out I am completely wrong 😅

Jobs are hell (for me). I'm not talking about work, working is fine. I also don't understand what job interviewers want to hear or why they never responded back to me. I got a job be sheer luck and after I made myself a whole lot worse. Culture is also confusing to me, especially nowadays, nothing makes sense. Over here if you don't have a job, you're treated like a second class citizen. I don't understand anything about this system called society and the 'rat race'. I always get underestimated in some aspects and overestimated in other aspects. A nice compact live where I work on my things hang out with the people I care about and meet the kind of people I want to meet. But no, the powers to be decided that everyone has to be part of 'society', what does that even mean? I don't know but I feel forced to be part of something gigantic and inhuman, it's confusing and it sucks. So yes I understand that you can be confused about stuff allistic people take for granted, cause I don't understand it either. I try to stay out of it.

A fellow amazon drop out xD, that place is defo not for us. I feel you, I have no idea how to interact with society, its too confusing and so arbitrary and I just want control of situations and my life but society has chipped away at me. I feel I have no choice but to have others help me and that has lead me to being exploited and abused and if I run out of people to help, well it's game over 😔.

My head almost fell off because I was nodding so hard at the part about not knowing what NTs do with their free time. I feel like I'm just wasting time when I have free time and it makes me feel unsure of myself.

Thank you for this! ❤ Things that confuse me in no particular order: 1. Queueing/standing in line for anything and what to do when you get to the front of the line if the person behind the desk doesn’t explicitly tell you what to do 2. Interactions at work and how long or in-depth they should be and how to end an interaction 3. Groups of people. Just groups of people. 4. How to arrive at someone’s house if you don’t know them well yet. How to leave someone’s house when it’s open-ended and you want to leave. 5. How to buy tickets at events or for transportation (and I’ve done a lot of traveling since I was tiny and it still confuses me) 6. How to buy groceries for a specific amount of time (been doing this forever too) 7. How to clean and maintain a house (again, I’ve been doing this for so long but it still confuses me) 8. How to act when someone is in the doorway where you need to enter 9. How to enter a room with other people inside it That’s all I can think of right now. But you’re right, perpetual confusion and intelligence somehow coexist because I’m quite good at lots of things including reading and thinking and writing. Is this an example of “spiky skills”?? I just learned about that recently

Have you ever listened to Alan Watts on UA-cam about the polarity of yin yang ☯? It’s a fascinating take on life 😁👍

Thank you I been really thinking about this me and my wife get in to arguments because my mind just drifts off I told her I do not do this on purpose. Peace love & light❤

Facebook market place is where I tend to sell my stuff and have made hundreds over the years. I'm newly diagnosed Autistic and some friends say your rooms always messy so you can't be autistic too. Mine is very organised it's just my friends dont realise it.

I never noticed your eyebrows looking strange. You generally look nice in my opinion.

Oh and beroccas really help with the poor diet. The blackcurrant ones taste the least rank.

I self referred to adult social services and now I have a carer come in twice a week to help with house work and take me shopping.

This is great for body doubling. I can actually do some exercise without ending up on Twitter and forgetting about it.

Just keeping on top of day to day stuff

Yup.

I'm curious about all the blankets, what are they all for?

I love your cats so much. Do they get along? I have two cats and the younger one annoys the older one a LOT and bites him and I hate that he does that.

I also have lists of my favourite things 😂😭

If you put a male sounding name on the delivery order they will just leave it at the door and leave.

I'm doing the kitchen to this now. 😊

I like your shorts!

I really like how you bring up money/paying at the end heheh its exactly how I would say it

Literally just got into trying doll customizing, couldn't relate more 🥲

I had complicated grief when my grandma died in '21. (Which was further complicated by my aunt deciding that I wasn't allowed to go to the funeral because there was a capacity limit due to covid restrictions and I simply wasn't important enough. But that's a whole other thing.) Before she had her stroke when I was a teen, she and my grandfather were very indifferent towards me and didn't try to bond with me. They definitely preferred my sister and my aunt's kids over me and my brother. But after her stroke she was much more interested in my life - still judgy at times, but I tried not to take it personally. So it was very hard for me when she died because I had been somewhat rebuilding our relationship. My grandfather is still kind of indifferent towards me, but I think he feels shame after the stunt my aunt pulled. He's been in hospital for about a month now and will be going into hospice care, so I'm in research mode on how to handle the bereavement process. (I don't know if I'm expected in the receiving line at the visitation. I hope not, because I loathe the prospect of random friends of my grandfather saying how sorry they are when neither of us knows who the f--k the other is! I might beg off the visitation by saying that I have to stay home with the dog.) I'm thinking about what clothes would be appropriate, what kind of things I can stim with, etc. But I'm also aware of my weird stress quirks. Like, I don't go off food when I'm in crisis; I get hungrier. And I clean, and try to look after my mom (who is chronically ill and has an even more complicated relationship with my grandfather). I'm speaking of my maternal grandparents specifically. I didn't know my dad's parents because his father died when he was a kid and his mom was a horror show. I felt nothing when Paternal Grandmother died, but I was a little perplexed that nobody asked if I wanted to attend the funeral. Not that I would have, but it would've been nice to be asked. My dad went to his job as normal and responded to his coworkers condolences with something like, "Don't be sorry, you didn't know her."

Ooo can't wait to see the finished puppets, also I bet you would love this video game from the 2000s called the movies, the game it's self is managing a movie studio from the 1920s onwards but thats not the best part, it has this movie maker feature, ya can pick the sets, place objects and change settings etc and choose what the chars wear and you can export the movie when you finished too.

I've got the kitchen and bathroom to do - well overdue - I just can't summon the energy to get it done. But you never know....... ☝🏼

This video is very relatable to me. I don’t know what else to say.

10:00 I almost feel called out by this with my top 10 book lists 😂

Now I want to see ballet with only fat people! Wouldn't that be a nice piece of #fatliberation 🙂

Wow, this sounds so familiar. I had the same kind of epiphany, that allistic people just have this kind of uncanny valley experience with us. Helped me so much to kind of forgive my younger self for not being more likeable. Teachers at my school were just totally out of their depths when it came to dealing with the amount of and the severity of bullying I was subjected to. I was always told not to rise to the taunts, keep my temper and shrug it off. Fat load of help that was trying to control autistic meltdowns. It was always somehow my fault when I just completely lost it and either imploded and hid in the toilets or in the cellar, or exploded and tried to smack the hell out of them. I also started doing Judo at the age of six, so by the time I was a teenager, if someone started a fight, they had to be prepared to at least receiving as much as they were dishing out. My idea was that I'd be better at standing up for myself. All it actually did was that to the teachers, now I was the aggressive kid who abused his martial arts training to hurt others. When I moved on to college, there were attempts to bully me as well, but compared to what I've had to deal with in the past, that was all tame. I've seen and heard it before. I had all the comebacks ready. I'll never forget that moment when that one dude tried to make some jokes at my expense, telling everybody how "gay" I was. I just started to hit on him so hard, it was so cringe that everybody just started laughing their heads off, even his friends. Never spoke a word to me again. There was that other time when someone tried to make fun of me, because I ran a round in a long black leather cloak, big leather boots, pentacle rings and amulets... very gothy type of outfit (admittedly, I looked like an overgrown bat). So I took off one of my necklaces, held it out in front of me, screwed up my face and started chanting Latin sounding none-sense. Basically turned the weirdness up to 11. Not sure whether she was genuinely terrified of me because she actually believed I worshipped Satan, or whether she was just so weirded out she wouldn't want to be near me. Doesn't matter, she left me alone and me and my friends had a real good laugh.

at 10:30 that looks like some black mould developing, it can become dangerous long term, If you dilute some bleach and put it in a spray bottle it should get rid of it

Haven't watched the vid yet, but I want to say that I love the thumbnail. "Let's Tidy My Room Yet Again Because Apparently I'm Physcially Unable To Keep It Tidy For More than Two Minutes" I related to this and I hate how relatable that it is.

Me In America: But what is 37 degrees??? LOLOL sorry... pay me no mind! Hope you recovered quickly, Sunshine!

I relate so much to the food stuff. I have a hard time finding a balance....extremes are my special interest hah. Right now i'm surviving on candy and bagels with cream cheese. Have had an ED before and now understand it more as an autistic experience. Makes so much more sense. I would have a rage fit (meltdown) in treatment when the milk was left out long enough to be anything but ice cold and they would not accommodate. Blaming it on ED behaviours rather than being sensory driven!

I can relate. Any time I'm not a total and utter failure socially, I start to doubt myself. Or when I manage to stay emotionally regulated or can handle some sensory stuff. But then I have those times when I'm having meltdowns, and I just can't do social interaction, and I still don't know how to make and keep friends... It's so hard to keep in mind that autism is a dynamic disability, so our abilities and capacity will fluctuate from day to day. That doesn't invalidate our diagnosis.

Lol so I of course started trying to make a list and figure out what needed and a lot could be very occasional or even once set up I might be okay less something needs adding but yeah. Technically i'm listed level one for autism and severe for adhd but due to fear of stigma and worry over rights possibly disappearing and such I did hold back on a bunch of the autism stuff and what not to try and not be given level 2 which is likely what I should be at. The adhd I probably would've held back on too except I hadn't researched it anywhere near as much as the autism previous to assessment. And yeah I know doing that's problematic and likely wasn't the best idea but meh? help finding suitable place to live if it exists. not owned by parents allows pets cheap place to access car without safety issue safe fits books computer etc access to outdoors air conditioning dishwasher fits shower chair space for art making Food assistance executive functioning issues nutritionist maybe help figuring out freezer prep/v easy meal creation help figuring out how to make timers and track things. figure out shopping for food/setting up auto order find better ways to deal with arfid/sensory issues try to find safefoods that can stay safefoods. bills figuring out what actually need/don't getting services to right services auto payments setup and reminders for when things are coming out of accounts paperwork can't keep up with/fill out properly help understanding executive functioning with getting paperwork straight done system for filing copies on computer and online appointments/phone call need help making appointments and phone calls need help planning for appointments and phone calls need help figuring out what's needed need help speaking up/follow through organizing/cleaning/moving body doubling would likely solve a lot of issues around this also need someone to help fully set up a system of schedules sometimes I just can't physically get this stuff done and need help doing the things need reminders to stay on top of things shopping for house items can't figure out what have/out of not good at figuring out lists don't focus well in stores auto-ship would probably help self care need help figuring out ways to make things more accessible need to figure out how to be able to maintain things on a daily basis maybe some kind of check in or spot someone can see so i feel held accountable maybe alarms/trackers/schedule setup fully help staying on top of things prescriptions delivered and reminders for when they need filing comprehension help either coach or therapist to talk things over and go over things help understanding why something didn't go right or how to understand what someone said. connection assistance could really use regular connection with healthy or at least safe people need more of like a texting network/group/checkin/something need physical connection with people even just body doubling or such ideally once a week assistance with tasks my brain has issues with for example putting car seat covers on car seats listing stuff for sale (art or things realize don't need)