FTM: 1 Year On Testosterone Transition (Singing Edition)

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  • Опубліковано 9 бер 2020
  • Hi everyone! My name is Kishuan and I've been working for over a year on a project that I hold very close to my heart. Over two years ago, I made the decision to go through with a life-long journey of medically transitioning. I changed my name, and began seeing a gender therapist, to consult about the possibility of taking masculinizing hormones.
    One thing that I was very hesitant about was the changes that testosterone would make on my voice. I loved to sing, and I still do, and although singing with such a high voice back then gave me so much dysphoria, I was scared of losing my ability to sing. Regardless of those fears, I found that living as my true self outweighed any of the losses that may come with it, and so began this project.
    Now that I am one year on testosterone, I would like to share my journey.
    I would love for this video to one day reach someone and inspire them to live authentically and un-apologetically.
    Like, share, and subscribe! 😄
    Instagram: @kishuan0
    Background Music: Hypnotized · Weston Estate · Marco Luka · Tanu • Hypnotized

КОМЕНТАРІ • 172

  • @kishuan7355
    @kishuan7355  3 роки тому +107

    Just for anyone asking the song names, here's a list, going in order by each month:
    Lost without U - Robin Thicke
    Fool For You - Snoh Aalegra
    Erase - Omar Apollo
    Sunday Morning - Maroon 5
    Easy - Mac Ayres
    A Whole New World - Lea Salonga & Brad Kane (Disney's Aladdin)
    Remember Me - Carlos Rivera (Coco)
    Lovebug - Jonas Brothers
    Kung Maibabalik Ko Lang - BuDaKhel
    Stronger Than - Gabe Bondoc
    Spend My Life With You - Eric Benet
    Bakit Ba Ikaw - Michael Pangilinan
    On Bended Knee - Boyz II Men
    Because Of You - Ne-Yo
    Lemonade - Jeremy Passion
    Angel 2 Me - Jeff Bernat & McKay
    over and over - sky
    Brokenhearted - Brandy
    Imahe - Magnus Haven
    Overjoyed - Stevie Wonder
    Cheers! :D

    • @dyebrada6468
      @dyebrada6468 3 роки тому

      Yay. Thank you

    • @dyebrada6468
      @dyebrada6468 3 роки тому +1

      Love your song choices.

    • @yian95954
      @yian95954 2 роки тому

      Are you south Korean? I think you are from east Asian

    • @ksthepro.
      @ksthepro. 10 місяців тому +1

      ​@@yian95954answering very late,but he's filipino.

    • @innohasclay9996
      @innohasclay9996 7 місяців тому

      Are you Pinoy? I’m a Filipino trans boy and it’s so nice to find another Filipino trans boy. Btw you have a great singing voice!

  • @makkeoli
    @makkeoli 3 роки тому +376

    i'm a trans boy too and lately i've been having doubts about starting testosterone cause i thought that my ability to sing was gonna dissapear, i dunno why but that was one of my most important concerns but by watching your video and others too, it really helped me get my mind on track and just decide to start that transition, thank you very much for sharing this, actualy i think i´m gonna cry just by writing this comment, singing is so important in my life i don't know what i would do if I couldn't sing so yeah thank you man

    • @nickthebrazilianguy
      @nickthebrazilianguy 3 роки тому +7

      same!! I was so worried about it

    • @thevillagegay
      @thevillagegay 2 роки тому +24

      I was having the same fears. Singing is an enormous thing in my life, and my only concern was how testosterone would affect my voice, especially my volume. I'm so glad there are videos like this out there.

    • @dylanagoblin9298
      @dylanagoblin9298 2 роки тому +6

      Singing is my whole life and if I lost my voice I’d lose everything so that’s why I’m here too 💖

    • @makkeoli
      @makkeoli 2 роки тому +25

      update, so i've been on testosterone for like 6 months now i think, i have a little mustache xd, and maaaaan my muscles r like huge and i don't even go to the gym, also like i have no ass now, i dunno, all the fat that was going there now is in my stomach 🤦‍♂️ but anw i'm glad with the changes i'm having, also my register is a loooot deeper in a really nice way, but to sing i have some problems but is just cause i'm still adjusting, it's like a 2nd puberty, also, 3 comments wow, god bless you people, i hope everything is okay and i wish you a very happy life

    • @lunalovedraw3783
      @lunalovedraw3783 2 роки тому +6

      I’ve been having doubts too, especially about what if I regret it and ruin everything.. but everyone has been so comforting and proving that it’s going to be okay and that it’s perfectly fine to feel scared

  • @shining_valoka
    @shining_valoka 3 роки тому +138

    Great singing bro. Made me less scared about going on T.
    I love singing but I’m reaalllyy shy regarding my voice. Sometimes I almost can’t say a word on public. Pretty hard. Because of that all I can do is “whisper sing”.

    • @timeywimeyfezzes
      @timeywimeyfezzes 3 роки тому +6

      omg I feel like that so much! I've never thought someone would feel the same as me

    • @kerokeroppii
      @kerokeroppii 3 роки тому +5

      yeahh same

  • @vinny6375
    @vinny6375 3 роки тому +211

    Holy shit I don't think I've heard any other trans guy sound this clean every month. Also your guitar playing is beautiful as well. This has really inspired me!!

  • @bowleowle
    @bowleowle Рік тому +46

    Trans boy here, thank you so much for posting this. I've seen so many horror stories of T ruining people's voices, esp when it comes to singing, and it's the number 1 reason I'm reluctant to start HRT. Singing... If I _lost_ that, I don't know what I'd do with myself. Thank you so so much for helping me and so many others see that really, there's nothing to worry about. Really, thank you.

  • @noahjohnson6692
    @noahjohnson6692 3 роки тому +130

    Boy what do you mean you can't sing? That was beautiful!

    • @CandyKitty_Doll
      @CandyKitty_Doll 2 роки тому +6

      I agree, I'm getting voice lessons next month to boost up my confidence and get better at singing. I am ok at it, but I want to be better.

  • @BeautyInTheMagic
    @BeautyInTheMagic 2 роки тому +48

    My voice makes me incredibly dysphoric. I’ve loved singing my entire life, but there are days it makes me so sad to do so. This gives me hope that my voice will at least get lower where I feel more comfortable using it consistently. (Also, your voice is literal butter 😂)

  • @reighn831
    @reighn831 Рік тому +16

    Losing my ability to sing is a sacrifice I was entirely prepared to make,, but seeing this I think I won't have to make any sacrifices at all. Thanks for the video

  • @kerokeroppii
    @kerokeroppii 3 роки тому +88

    I'm really scared about the changes T can do to my voice, I also love singing and even tho it makes me dysphoric I still love to do it; this video is really comfortating for me, it's just a way for me to know that T isn't going to ruin my voice, thank you for this video. Much love 💜

  • @alexhornewer8396
    @alexhornewer8396 4 роки тому +107

    Holy SHIT you have an amazing voice, this makes me feels so much better about not losing my singing voice on T, thank you!

    • @TheSeaSwells
      @TheSeaSwells Рік тому +1

      I feel the same way, this video really put my mind at ease. Did you end up starting T? If so, how was your vocal progression?

  • @garyaguto9667
    @garyaguto9667 4 роки тому +70

    Amazing braddah. The voice changed but you still had all that control. Proud of you.

  • @rachelkamradt9836
    @rachelkamradt9836 3 роки тому +16

    omg the filipino songs inserted in there are giving me LIFE

  • @lizpup4090
    @lizpup4090 Рік тому +6

    Omg this helps me feel more confident transitioning I was so scared I wouldn't be able to sing after my voice changes. I love this

  • @Fab-ow8co
    @Fab-ow8co 10 місяців тому +3

    Every time I feel insecure about my singing voice changing with T, I watch this video. You sound so good

  • @foregroundeclipse8725
    @foregroundeclipse8725 2 роки тому +14

    My man your way too humble. Your pretty damn good at singing! I'm so happy for you! Sometime in April I'm going to see someone to start HRT. I'm trans man pre-T and everything who's 20 years old. I've waited a good portion of my life for this very moment. Hopefully I can make it. You inspire me and I can't wait to see what videos you make in the future.

  • @Orchidlettux
    @Orchidlettux 3 роки тому +17

    My singing voice isn’t a problem for me losing it (since I suck at it anyway) but I’m glad you’re comfortable with who you are now! I really love your voice! Once I’ll be old enough to start T I’ll try to practice on my singing :D

  • @nikoloar5056
    @nikoloar5056 3 роки тому +21

    that kid singing with u awwwwww

  • @kristengronlund
    @kristengronlund 2 роки тому +6

    I got goosebumps listening to you sing. Woa. Dude. Dude. I got a little emotional. Your emotions really show through your voice when you’re singing.

  • @edge-kun7019
    @edge-kun7019 4 роки тому +12

    Brooooo that tenor hitcha on month twoooooo I cant wait for my S.O. to hit the vocal range he's always wanted tooooo~

  • @jamesfactora1939
    @jamesfactora1939 3 роки тому +8

    thank you so much for sharing; also filipino and this video means a lot to me as someone who's put off transitioning for years because of the effect on my singing voice

  • @gagetheking9309
    @gagetheking9309 3 роки тому +19

    Thank you so much for this video! Really man from the bottom of my heart!! I’ve been so worried that My music Career would totally be RECKED when I started T but this gives me so much hope!! You sound awesome!!!

  • @zachrubinic9525
    @zachrubinic9525 5 місяців тому +1

    I can still sing my range has just changed and while it’s not necessarily harder to control my voice, it’s a different approach, so it’s still taking some getting used to. This might resemble the “horror” stories people have told… maybe people just didn’t understand what’s going on

  • @alternategender8471
    @alternategender8471 Рік тому +2

    I used to be a soprano and I really hope to sing again someday but it’s hard to change where I sing from. Used to such a more head-tone than throat or chest tone. You inspire me for sure!

  • @dylan4142
    @dylan4142 3 роки тому +4

    im 1 month on t and god i wanna be just like you when im 1 year!!!!!!!! go king, left no crumbs

  • @lyonclaws5737
    @lyonclaws5737 4 роки тому +9

    you make a sick aladdin, keep it coming man!! you're fucking cool!!

  • @wrennnnnnnnn4811
    @wrennnnnnnnn4811 8 місяців тому +1

    Singing is probably one of the most important things in my life, and I’ve always thought I just wasn’t gonna go on t to preserve my voice, and that might still be true as I’m not 100% sure on my identity, but this is really reassuring that my skill won’t go away. Thank you for this. Beautiful voice

  • @Chaoticgoodbard
    @Chaoticgoodbard 2 роки тому

    This is the best singing transition video I've seen! Sounds so clean all the way through, really amazing. Thanks for making this!

  • @moonstrifflimestone5493
    @moonstrifflimestone5493 2 роки тому +6

    Man I really love seeing these singing transition timelines, great singing bro!

  • @wasureru
    @wasureru 3 роки тому +2

    wow this is amazing !! your voice sounds so good bro 😍

  • @shpunkpunk
    @shpunkpunk 4 роки тому +4

    Thank you for the video! Helped me a lot to see you still hitting those nice runs a year later 🤙

  • @damidevil5257
    @damidevil5257 2 роки тому +3

    You gave me a bit of hope ;-; I'm a singer who just took my first T dose today. I've already accepted the loss of my voice a bit, but now I might try and rehearse through and see if I can't keep this talent I've built up all my life.

  • @reymazing731
    @reymazing731 3 роки тому +1

    Your voice is literally so smooth and nice to listen to-- I'm obsessedd

  • @archivbox1
    @archivbox1 3 роки тому +2

    Your voice is soooooo amazing (every single version of it! ) 😍😍😍

  • @Bradley6761
    @Bradley6761 7 місяців тому

    Thank you so much for posting this, it's given me so much hope and joy

  • @sourlemons4
    @sourlemons4 3 роки тому +7

    i love your voice so much. cant wait to start T. Ive been watching these singing timeline videos because im not sure how it will affect my singing but you sound amazing so thank you for that. subscribed :)

  • @Kronos_tiago
    @Kronos_tiago 3 роки тому +3

    Dude! you do can sing! great video !!!

  • @blueberrymuffin7207
    @blueberrymuffin7207 2 роки тому

    duuuuude you are so talented. Your tone is so smooth and beautiful and that falsetto is souper clean and killer. AMAZING SINGING! Also nice transition, must feel so good :)

  • @ZukoTheFireLord1
    @ZukoTheFireLord1 Рік тому

    To me it’s so incredible how much of a change you can already notice after just 1 month!
    Your voice is amazing no doubt and I’m always ao happy to see people going for their dreams especially because I stopped right before it and I’m still not sure wether I regret it or not!
    So proud of everyone who follows their hearts ❤️

  • @leonorabrandscheit
    @leonorabrandscheit 2 роки тому +3

    this helps so much. i'm afraid to lose my singing voice, but your talent, which doesn't got lost, fills me with hope :)

  • @foregroundeclispeleon6223
    @foregroundeclispeleon6223 2 роки тому +7

    Your singing voice is amazing dude! I'm a trans man ftm too but I'm Pre-T I hope I can start testronone soon.

  • @ollie8314
    @ollie8314 2 роки тому +1

    2-3 months is hitting me like a truck right now. This is giving me a lot of comfort and hope and makes me eager to work with my voice coming into the future

  • @Airbender1802
    @Airbender1802 2 місяці тому

    Your voice, Guitar and singing are so pretty and calming!

  • @TreasureSky4257
    @TreasureSky4257 2 роки тому +2

    I Am Looking To Transition & I Am A Singer. You Are Amazing From The Beginning Of Your Transition & The Continuation. Thank You So Much For This. You Are Truly An Inspiration.

  • @user-jx2bz9jp9t
    @user-jx2bz9jp9t 2 місяці тому +1

    omg dude your voice is amazing and this video comforted me SO MUCH as an ftm singer who wants to go on T

  • @sbudke8607
    @sbudke8607 3 роки тому +6

    literally everything about his singing voice oh my god his singing voice is soooooooo goooooooddddd

  • @anabeara6953
    @anabeara6953 4 роки тому

    Bravo !! So proud of u!!!!!!

  • @happoiuy
    @happoiuy 2 роки тому

    Thank you so so much for making this video, I've been considering starting T and very worried about how it will change my signing voice. This video is so joyful and it definitely calmed my fears!

  • @sainthills
    @sainthills 4 роки тому +5

    you have a beautiful voice man 😍

  • @coryguyon3924
    @coryguyon3924 8 місяців тому

    Boy, your voice is amazing 😍

  • @zzero0orezz
    @zzero0orezz 3 роки тому +1

    damn u look so gr8 man, also ur singing are so goddamn soothing 🥺

  • @mrressetti
    @mrressetti 2 роки тому +2

    im having major doubts about going on t when im able to, because i want to be a singer and i was scared itd ruin my voice. but ur voice is still amazing lmaoo, its rlly inspiring, thanks :)

  • @julianskull
    @julianskull 2 роки тому

    Wow 😍 Your voice is incredible! I just started t a few days ago.

  • @Demontime2k22
    @Demontime2k22 Рік тому +1

    I almost thought I lost my voice until I saw this 😩😩 you just kept singing right and exercising your voice ??

  • @Kamilp03
    @Kamilp03 3 роки тому +6

    Wow such a amazing voice 😍♥️🔥🔥🔥

  • @emones2060
    @emones2060 3 роки тому

    This is so helpful! Thank you!!

  • @ajjacobs3327
    @ajjacobs3327 2 роки тому +1

    I started T today and I’m excited to hear my voice change over time.

  • @Rivaiye
    @Rivaiye Рік тому

    I could listen to you the whole day 🥺❤️

  • @apotalogialxf905
    @apotalogialxf905 2 роки тому

    Hi ! Thank you for making this video ^^ I have been hesitant about going on T because I love my singing voice and I'm so afraid to lose my singing abilities idk why, like not singing in tune anymore

  • @aldranzam3456
    @aldranzam3456 Рік тому

    I think I may be a little bit in love

  • @tiredloco
    @tiredloco 2 роки тому

    you give me so much hope

  • @ItwasntI
    @ItwasntI 3 роки тому +5

    BEAUTIFUL!

  • @foopfighter
    @foopfighter Місяць тому

    this is so sick thank u for compiling this !!

  • @HSTS_Mari
    @HSTS_Mari 3 роки тому

    You are so adoreable and your singing is great💖

  • @oliverfonseca8334
    @oliverfonseca8334 3 роки тому +3

    I love singing but I'm scared to start T because of all the voice cracks and changes and stuff.

  • @annspirit24
    @annspirit24 10 місяців тому

    Your both voices are amazing 😊🎉

  • @lucathesadman
    @lucathesadman Рік тому +3

    How are you able to still hit high notes so easily? It’s almost impossible for me now

  • @bowleowle
    @bowleowle Рік тому +1

    Direct comparison Pre-T vs 1-year timestamps:
    Pre-T: 2:21
    1-year: 7:37

  • @beansystem
    @beansystem Рік тому

    This gave me so much euphoria TYSM! I've known I'm trans + been out for years, and I'm certain that top surgery is in my near future, but I've had some mixed feelings about starting T. One of the things I was nervous about was losing my singing voice. I already have a nice low range, and the lower I train my voice, the more euphoric I feel... I'm starting to think I'm ready to start T. Thanks so much for sharing this.

  • @PeterPAN-dy6kb
    @PeterPAN-dy6kb 8 місяців тому

    the 2 months hits me so hard I wanna start my treatment so bad

  • @chickenkookko4735
    @chickenkookko4735 7 місяців тому

    Wonderful voice ❤

  • @rae2030
    @rae2030 Рік тому +1

    im a 17 year old transboy pre-T and i was trying to sing an OPM song earlier but felt dysphoric because of the sound of my voice and if the amount of euphoria i felt from hearing your singing voice on 2-3 months wasnt enough, when i realized you were singing a filipino song on 5 months of T i cried. this made me so hopeful. so, genuinely, thank you so much for making this video :))

  • @omnimonium
    @omnimonium Рік тому +1

    seeing all the comments, i’m so glad i’m not alone. i love singing, but the fact i can’t sing a lot of lower songs is so dysphoria-fueling. i had to sing never there by cake an octave up for a band i was in about a year ago, and despite it being one of my favorite songs, i hated every second of it. i am so proud that i can reach the low notes now, i bottom out at an E3 usually but i can go down to a C3 if my voice is working. i just wish i could start T. my mom is all for it, but i think my dad disguises his disapproval and fear of losing his little girl with the fact that i’m too young or it could just be part of me discovering myself. i hate that argument so much, though. just because i only came out to him around a year ago doesn’t mean i haven’t felt this way for way longer. i have several friends who are on T, some of whom were multiple years younger than me when they started. i’m sorry for the long rant, i just wish so badly i could take the steps to get on T.

    • @whalium889
      @whalium889 5 місяців тому

      Hope things are well now!!

  • @alexanderbatura879
    @alexanderbatura879 3 роки тому +1

    WHAT A VOICE CONTROL. EVEN ON TESTOSTERONE😍

  • @zackriotpdx
    @zackriotpdx 3 роки тому

    You sound amazing man.

  • @BonesInThePumpkinPatch
    @BonesInThePumpkinPatch Рік тому +1

    I’m so terrified of going on t cuz it might ruin my voice, and I’m a musician but this gives me hope

  • @DSKim-ej5uf
    @DSKim-ej5uf 4 роки тому +6

    세상모두가힘든 지금 이시기에 이렇게 값진영상 감사히 잘 감상했습니다.코로나19가 하루빨리 사라지기를 바라면서 동시에 님 채널이 점점발전되셔서 꼭 초대형채널이되시기를 진심응원드려요. Corona virus 19, where concerns have become a reality. At this time, I was really grateful for this valuable video. I hope that Corona 19 will disappear as soon as possible, and at the same time, I hope that your channel will gradually develop and become a very large channel. love so much this video. like the video is the best. As we develop day by day,Always follow your luck.I sincerely hope that your channel will be very big.

  • @d4llyy685
    @d4llyy685 Рік тому

    THANKS SO MUCH FOR THIS

  • @blue_jay582
    @blue_jay582 2 роки тому

    Your voice is amazing

  • @annspirit24
    @annspirit24 10 місяців тому

    With teso your voice is clearer and more softly I think 😊

  • @brenparker1156
    @brenparker1156 2 роки тому

    you should cover a still woozy song! i love ur voice

  • @Ballsareitchy
    @Ballsareitchy 2 роки тому

    😐 bruh wtf why are you so talented and beautiful like give me your looks 😭

  • @sjbass26
    @sjbass26 10 місяців тому +1

    i’m a trans guy here and one of my favorite things is singing so i was worried about losing my voice after T so thank you for this video ❤

  • @jo.k.4210
    @jo.k.4210 Рік тому

    woowww your voice is magic holy sacred shtt

  • @rozieboss154
    @rozieboss154 3 роки тому +1

    Don't ever stop singing!

  • @awysuh13
    @awysuh13 4 роки тому

    the ninth month is my fave 🤩

  • @vophie
    @vophie 3 роки тому +1

    Love your haircut

  • @toby2438
    @toby2438 Рік тому +1

    the 8 month clip oh my godd

  • @Lost_in_my_basement
    @Lost_in_my_basement 3 роки тому +2

    I think your voice actually sounds better and your singing too

  • @ineffablemars
    @ineffablemars Рік тому

    him: "I'm not a good singer"
    him: *proceeds to sing like an angel*

  • @duck7496
    @duck7496 4 роки тому +20

    Daaaaaang your voice is getting lower
    Can't wait to see you again soon lil' bro
    We gotta duet lol
    Soundin dreamy af

  • @user-go7ns8qz2e
    @user-go7ns8qz2e 9 місяців тому

    제발 노래 영상을 더 올려주십쇼!!!
    너무 좋은 노래

  • @monkeybeatz4185
    @monkeybeatz4185 3 роки тому +1

    OH MY GHAAD I JUST REALISED YOUR A FILIPINO now I confidence to tell my parentss

  • @zj.mp4
    @zj.mp4 Рік тому +1

    honestly I've just started posting music stuff and it kinda sucks because i can usually pass but my voice is an obvious giveaway singing or not. I'm just hoping it's overlooked lol.

  • @monkeybeatz4185
    @monkeybeatz4185 3 роки тому +2

    I hope my parents agrees to my decision on taking testosterone😭😭

  • @philip2774
    @philip2774 10 місяців тому

    I came looking for evidence of a secret conspiracy of popular yet hidden costrados in modern times. Your voice was and is fantastic. It also bolsters the conspiracy.

  • @user-nx5qd4lw2h
    @user-nx5qd4lw2h 6 місяців тому +1

    You sound very good and look very good

  • @ThreeStarsandaSon
    @ThreeStarsandaSon 4 роки тому +8

    Eargasssssm. New Subscriber here.
    Hi. I was still a baby when you were here in PH. I'm Tiff, Toto Dio's daughter.

    • @kishuan7355
      @kishuan7355  4 роки тому +1

      Hey Tiff! I still remember you :) Thanks for your subscription

  • @kravenaaa1986
    @kravenaaa1986 3 роки тому +2

    You have a good taste of music. May I know the title of these songs, dude? Thank you.

  • @howseFinch
    @howseFinch Рік тому

    I’m 4 months on t and my voice is lower and pretty much at the drop and I can’t sing like any baseline pitch. Basically my speaking tone is the highest I can go so right now it’s difficult to sing at all cause I physically can’t or have to sing low and there’s not much range. Hoping it stabilizes soon

  • @jacobashley288
    @jacobashley288 10 місяців тому +2

    Does anybody have tips on how to adjust to the change? I am really upset about how out of control I feel over my voice. I really love to sing and I don't want to lose that