Baby mantis: where’s daddy. Female mantis: he’s the first man who ever escaped me. Baby mantis: I want to meet him Female mantis: I want to meet him and eat him.
Humans are animals Just because it doesn't arouse you, doesn't mean it's not porn I am not sexually aroused by child pornography, but that doesn't mean it's not porn, because it is classified as such.
Baby mantis: Where's my dad? Mom mantis: Somewhere...he's the first to ever escape Baby mantis:Escape from...what? Mom mantis: Escape from me biting his head off Baby mantis: what? Mom mantis: what?
Not to sound... Sexist(?) But I think he deserves being on top, with all of the male animals being treated like dirt. I mean, before, men used to treat women as dirt before the girls began becoming more independent so this is balance
When humans mate: Gotta pull out to avoid child support Male mantis mate: This is where my life ends, and my legacy begins... 24 hrs later: Human saves male with tweezers Male mantis: F*CK MY LEGACY!
taCocat_64 7 I wasn't given a name until I survived the wilderness on my own for a year after I turned 7. After I came back I quickly learned of the internet and have never left my room since.
They've actually evolved to be okay with the females eating them because it gives the male's chance at passing on his genes a boost (if the female is well nourished, even by male mantis, then she has a better chance of producing viable eggs)
I see how you could assume some scientific fact has become fallacy after many years of change and better understanding, but unless you have counter evidence that holds as much weight as currently believed information on mantis behavior, then the current knowledge stands as fact
N: Oh, your approaching me? Instead of running away, you are approaching me? B: I cant mate you without getting closer N: then come as close as you like
Mission control this is bruce, operation is a success. "copy that bruce, you better get out of there" *negative mission control, too dangerous. Gonna need an evac*
Bruce: I like big butts and I can not lie. Helllllooooo how you doin? Natasha: (eating cricket) Bruce: Not a talker huh? That's ok I shall just hop up here. Give ya nice little shiatsu massage, deliver my little package then be on my way. 24 hours later Bruce: Oi vey that was good. Hey you want to know my secret identity? Natasha: No but I know what your new identity is going to be Human tries to pick up Bruce Natasha: Oi WTF get off bitch. Human rescues Bruce Bruce: I'M BATMANTIS
i had 2 ghost mantises, i thought they where both male, i even tried counting the segments so i was pretty sure. until the last mold of 1 mantis i noticed he had female parts, and before the ugly truth hit me the next day, i was already to late. when i checked on the mantises the female was eating the male. i just had to sit and stare at my pet mantis that i raised getting eaten by his supposed friend. she started in the middle and lierally bend him in half and then snapped him off. his head was just laying there in my terrarium. It was pretty painfull.
@@prot07ype87 well mate, if you intentionally kept your door open at night you should expect getting robbed, it's not entirely your fault, but you shouldn't bitch about it
the reason he tapped her on the back is because he so small he cant connect his abdomen to hers. so he taps her requesting that she moves her abdomen to the right so he can reach her. also sexual canniblism is rare with that species so he would've been fine especially if you fed her allot.
Not really. Remember that the other male mantes were already eaten by that one female mantis. So, the odds are clearly against him. He clearly needed human intervention to survive.
Video was very informative. And the girl with the glasses, very cute and even cuter smile. She seemed very passionate about the mantis and their mating ritual.
You just need to find a short girl. There's lots of them. Also, have more confidence to make up for being a smol guy. Chicks dig a confident guy. You can fake it until its real.
What's interesting is that Bruce didn't seem like he wanted to let go either, even though he's facing almost certain death - his nature requires him to stay there until the female's gonna snatch at him
"Natasha's eating habits are becoming a problem."
Same here Natasha, same here.
LMAO
Pie And Ice cream Your UA-cam name actually makes sense
Really hope there not exactly the same and your eating males
My name is Natasha and honestly this relates too much
Except for eating the males
@@yuyyuww9087 LOL 😂
*"Bruce now needs an exit strategy"*
Words to live by.
True dat!
When a teen gets a girl pregnant
The boyfriend: *BRUCE NOW NEEDS AN EXIT STRATEGY*
@@Funsheeps 😂😂😂
Bruce's homies: how did you escape
Bruce: I'm batman
@@Funsheeps XDDD
He didnt technically escape, his homies pulled him off with tweezers
Had you used the word "got" instead of "pulled"...
Technically that also is escaping from her.
@@timdeathly ok
Bruce was a maniac, he didn't want to stop.
His niggas came to the rescue
Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase, “looking like a snack”
Why isnt this top comment?
Marine Vet or good enough to eat.
😂😂
AAAAAJAHAHAHA
😂😂
My man Bruce lives to smash another day.
Terry Jones XD
LOLOLOLOLOL
Omg lol
Rather be a thot then get my head biter off XD guys
small but terrible
*FEMALE PRAYING MANTIS GETS CLOSER*
Bruce: Why do I hear boss music?
Specifically kajidoh from smrpg.
Insert soul of cinder theme🤣🤣🤣
If you have crickets equipped you can avoid the boss fight.
jzi4 this is a very accurate portrayal of some of the relationships that men have with women.
Don’t worry guys it’s FAMILY BUSINESS
Come on ladies you got to admit Bruce is a cute guy you just want to eat him up
Lmao
YEET
You should have more comments!👍
LMFAO
Tallacus Lmfao 😂 omg
The man, The myth, The legend, Bruce. Never had so much respect for a mantis. Gives a new meaning to “smash and dash” for male mantises.
"In fact Natasha has eaten all other males in the zoo."
Oh- so we can no longer see Tony, Steve, Clint and Thor??
Bruce is the strongest avenger of them all. Makes sense.
lol
More of Batman Bruce since he's the smartest one but okay...
😂😂😂
Natasha's a greedy bitch.
Bruce escaping the Kardashian Clan.
She's Catelyn now!
LOL that’s impossible
wOw
😂
LOL!!!
Despite the risk, Bruce still put in those pumps.
Natasha: *eats everyone who attempts to smash her*
Bruce: no one's gonna tango with the rango
Other guys: *Smashes Natasha*
Natasha: No one's gonna tango with the rango
That's what you meant to say?
@@totallynotme8153 nah, Bruce is a man to not be messed with, Natasha's just a slut
@@totallynotme8153 other way
**CRASHES THROUGH LE'WALL** IS THAT A FLOCKING RANGO REFFERENCE!?
I'mma steal your water.
Oh fuck. It's gone.
Oh hey look. A large water jug.
Bruh he is living the life they take him to the buns he beat for 24 hours and he got his own Uber x to bring him back home Bruh im jealous
Mans here living the good life
😭😭😭😂😂😂
imagine being jealous of an insect who fucked a praying mantis
@@RogerBLEU I mean hey who wouldn't be jealous?
@@RogerBLEU imagine NOT being jealous of an insect who fucked a praying mantis
When you realize they were named after avengers
Coincidence, i think not
natasha got reborn to this??
@@bethanyjayva70 Bruce Banner, the hulk, is an avenger
@@lucasrobin2788 ohhhhh, I completely forgot about him for a minute xD my bad haha
HOLY SHIT
Finalky another comment pointed it out. Sounds like they are HulkWidow fans...
Baby mantis: where’s daddy.
Female mantis: he’s the first man who ever escaped me.
Baby mantis: I want to meet him
Female mantis: I want to meet him and eat him.
Male Mantis: *_Drinking beer_*
Male Mantis: Aye, she was hot. But aye I’m a qui-
Me if I was the baby mantis: I would have ate him too mama just how I ate little Tim
@@adityarajasekar5138 baby mantis:"Exactly."
Female mantis: Wait, no. I want to meet him, bang him one more time...and THEN eat him.
@@adityarajasekar5138 things like that make me feel fortunate for being a human male and not an spider male or a praying mantis male
Male mantis knows he'll be devoured whenever he stops. That's the only reason they last so long XD.
Most likely
🤣🤣🤣
03samarth Hahaha, that would explain it.
He likes it. She likes it. Why not keep it going?
@@CryptoAmyUSA Actually, only about 6 or 7 species of animals enjoy sex: Humans, dolphins, pigs, bonobos and 1-2 species of primates
"And lives to fight another day."
Weren't you paying attention, Channel 4? He's a lover, not a fighter.
I like to have a beer with Bruce
ChrisDaGhxst 81 likes
Why does this have likes?
🤣
Understanding
24 hours ??? Oh My Lord, Bruce Lasted 23 hours and 55 minutes longer then i do, im working on it Bruce, you are my inspiration.
This made my day lol
Lmao, keep on at it boy.
practice makes perfect my dude
Oh my lord he's my hero
Plz, become a virgin.
He's so gonna be bragging to all the virgin mantis mates
😂😂
Lol
Uh there is no more his mates all died while trying to mate
I think they all died
All his mates got checkmate.
Bruce: Mates
Bruce: Successfully escapes being eaten.
Bruce: *CHA CHA REAL SMOOTH*
Guido Mista
You have 16 likes
16=4+4+4+4
Heavily sweating*
Also it matches to your profile picture
Dungeon Master hold up
*stick bugs*🦗
🤣
If she's busy with cricket, hit that wicket!
Gillette Razor lmao
Your dirty birdy
Lol 😅
🙈
Lmao
Shout-out to my man Bruce. He hit that and survived. No other male mantis in that zoo had that luck.
His homies had his back 😎
0:45 "This is Bruce...the zoo's last hope." Even the music was on point.
Damn.. Bruce is my kind of guy! Laid back and doesn't talk that much, would be nice to grab a drink with this fellow!
Xaniac omg. You just made me laugh so hard. Brilliant comment
@@jimmybaldwin737 thank you!
My name's Bruce and I fit that description. But I stopped drinking, I'm afraid.
@@Snyde91 darn
I suppose I could make an exception for you and have a few pints of beer.
my boy made it out
"Natasha has eaten every other male in the zoo,"
*"except from one"*
*dramatic music*
*bruce entered the chat*
I can imagine Bruce with a sambrero and a moustache
Ste Fan, lmao, lights a cigarette
@@thedude9024 pulls out a Modelo after lol
I dump a bag of males on her
"Every OTHER male" lol
So glad you saved him but boy she was pissed!
@memnok magee That is so machista hahaha
@memnok magee Exactly women never understands a man they think we dont feel what they feel.
@sos sos Pretty sure no one above is sad
@sos sos Of waht?
@sos sos You asked me why you are pissed? How would I know?
Grab and smash then run like flash
Lmao
Wtf? 😑😅
It's called smash and dash. Copulate then evacuate. Pump and dump.
muj - That’s a new one
🙈 (containing laughter)
Number one rule dont spoon
Gaming XP how to spoon?????
when the child support comes in
Indeed
Same nature. Male utility and disposability.
Female Mantis: I Love u
Male Mantis: I Love U to
Female: Ｓｏ ＹＯＵ ＨＡＶＥ ＣＨＯＳＥＮ ＤＥＡＴＨ
Yummy Yummy feed my tummy
"I love your body"
"Oh how sweet
3:49 Bruce: NOOO! I said I'd *die* for her! 😭
That naughty Natasha. He buggered her for 24 hours... what a stud!
Yet humans average like a minute on a good day 🤣😂
yea he smashed a big fucking hoe
What Bruce did here ain't called "buggering", my friend. He has much better aim than that.
@Dami fucked to death lmao
Probably why he lived. He left her quite satisfied.
He’s beauty
He’s grace
He be smashing for the race
Man mantis: * "so no head?"
Litteraliy
1 2 u jus salty
Niice
Lol man mantis
isnt this considered porn?
Strange Productions SFM no
Dino King yes it's basically filmed sex
Strange SFM only if it gets you sexually aroused. Then it's porn
Paul Mackenan But I am getting aroused.
Humans are animals
Just because it doesn't arouse you, doesn't mean it's not porn
I am not sexually aroused by child pornography, but that doesn't mean it's not porn, because it is classified as such.
Baby mantis: Where's my dad?
Mom mantis: Somewhere...he's the first to ever escape
Baby mantis:Escape from...what?
Mom mantis: Escape from me biting his head off
Baby mantis: what?
Mom mantis: what?
You are a dreamer 👍🏻😂
@1 2 someone is salty...
Demise funny Af😂😂😂😂😂
actually they usually eat the males alive, while they're busy mating. male mantises can keeping mating without their heads, so.....
Baby mantis:Mommy,where's daddy?
Female mantis:I ate him
Lmboo 🤣🤣
Ony 2 male replies
Baby Mantis: Oh...
@@melanief4115 😨........nope (jumps out Window)
@@melanief4115 oh hell no 🏃
Bruce: gets on Natasha's back
Natasha: what are you doing?
Bruce: male dominance
Not to sound... Sexist(?) But I think he deserves being on top, with all of the male animals being treated like dirt. I mean, before, men used to treat women as dirt before the girls began becoming more independent so this is balance
@@jonalynmisalang9447 That is complete nonsense.
@@infinitesimotel I know, I'm terrible.
I'll delete it
Edit: Forgot to say sorry.
So, sorry
What? Natasha "Romanov" and Bruce "Banner"? ^^
i9fasc7 PP im suprised this isnt pinned yet
No Bruce Wayne BATMANTIS
i9fasc7 PP just fucking kill me already
Good one.
I am SO glad I'm not the only one who immediately thought that
He lasted for 24 hours
I can barely last for 24 seconds
😢
noob
Oh fred. It's only natural lol
Lol sounds like u a late bloomer I remember my first cochie
Damn I can last 24.1 seconds 😎
Bruce survived because he prayed a lot before her met her.
feraljim IM SCREAMING 🤣🤣🤣
Sadly the zoo already conformed that bruce is an atheist
Oh you
Fam 🤣
Bruce: "Can't you see that i'm holding on so that I can fulfill my purpose? You humans just don't understand nature!" 😂
😂😂😂😂
this comment section, gold
Facilitate her prostrate.
No one plz dont ruin the 19
I mean 69
@@mrsgraceestores Too late
Darling what's for dinner? Wife: You.
Mushroom Head Natasha be tryna hit that Uno Reversal Card
Lmao
Male: Oh ho ho let’s go into the bed! 😍
Female: *bites off leg*
Male: *AH EY DEFUQUDOING*
Mantis logic -
Life a virgin,
Die a man..
@MrGreyjeep it does
@MrGreyjeep Jesus never exist.
@MrGreyjeep Prove he exist in some time of the history without using the bible.
@@Paredinho1 it's been proven that jesus is real. It's never been proven what hes has done is real
Epis response some say Paredinho1 is still looking for proof
When humans mate: Gotta pull out to avoid child support
Male mantis mate: This is where my life ends, and my legacy begins...
24 hrs later: Human saves male with tweezers
Male mantis: F*CK MY LEGACY!
*laughs*amazing comment!
This is a case where something is actually underrated
They actually gave names to mantises?
I would
your parents gave u a name
taCocat_63 7 ...and you take it on...
Why not
taCocat_64 7 I wasn't given a name until I survived the wilderness on my own for a year after I turned 7. After I came back I quickly learned of the internet and have never left my room since.
Escape? The mantis showed no desire to escape at all.
yeah he wanted to keep going at it even longer XD
They've actually evolved to be okay with the females eating them because it gives the male's chance at passing on his genes a boost (if the female is well nourished, even by male mantis, then she has a better chance of producing viable eggs)
El Bottoo says the armchair critic with little biology knowledge
El Bottoo and we are supposed 2 listen to u, right. mr el bottoo seller of curtains of the local neihboorhood..
the fuck are u.
I see how you could assume some scientific fact has become fallacy after many years of change and better understanding, but unless you have counter evidence that holds as much weight as currently believed information on mantis behavior, then the current knowledge stands as fact
3:56 more like “and lives to f**k another day”
Anonymous Hacker lol
I was scrolling to see if anyone else said this
N: Oh, your approaching me? Instead of running away, you are approaching me?
B: I cant mate you without getting closer
N: then come as close as you like
Mission control this is bruce, operation is a success.
"copy that bruce, you better get out of there"
*negative mission control, too dangerous. Gonna need an evac*
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😀😀😀😀😁😁😁😁😁😁
Bruce in not getting any reinforcements
Hot LZ. Need Extraction and expedite
😂😂😂
Bruce: I like big butts and I can not lie. Helllllooooo how you doin?
Natasha: (eating cricket)
Bruce: Not a talker huh? That's ok I shall just hop up here. Give ya nice little shiatsu massage, deliver my little package then be on my way.
24 hours later
Bruce: Oi vey that was good. Hey you want to know my secret identity?
Natasha: No but I know what your new identity is going to be
Human tries to pick up Bruce
Natasha: Oi WTF get off bitch.
Human rescues Bruce
Bruce: I'M BATMANTIS
The fuck did I just read? XD
Rose Violet An EPIC tale of adventure, drama and bug porn with overused 90's references and internet memes.
😂
" Oi vey" lmao
YellowSOY 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
He prottec
He attac
But more importantly,
He doesn't become after sex snac
Roberta Trevino I’m dead
Roberta Trevino 😂😂😂😂🔥🔥👍
Lmfao i hate these but that was funny😂😂
eww ur sick in the head
He protec
He attac
But more importantly,
*OH JESUS FUCKING CHRIST*
i had 2 ghost mantises, i thought they where both male, i even tried counting the segments so i was pretty sure. until the last mold of 1 mantis i noticed he had female parts, and before the ugly truth hit me the next day, i was already to late. when i checked on the mantises the female was eating the male. i just had to sit and stare at my pet mantis that i raised getting eaten by his supposed friend. she started in the middle and lierally bend him in half and then snapped him off. his head was just laying there in my terrarium. It was pretty painfull.
You should’ve avenged him
Rip my man
What a woman... 😵💫
She's a man eater alright.
@@tegamingother apparently humans are the only species that has consensual sex
He protec
He attac
He mated
And most importantly
He is not snac
He protecc
He attac
He escape to be a snac
But most importantly he release his ball sacc
Backpack BOI
He protecc
He attacc
But most in importantly
He hit it from the bacc
Without being snacc
Bruce may have escaped being a snack, but Family Court will make Bruce pay that child support and alimony.
@james calderon no body told you to reproduce nigga. You could have easily smashed with out having children. RIP
@@ethnicleanserberg7975 Victim-blaming.
@@prot07ype87 well mate, if you intentionally kept your door open at night you should expect getting robbed, it's not entirely your fault, but you shouldn't bitch about it
@james calderon You love your kids?
“And lives to fight another day”
More like, “and lives to f***k another day”😂
Fionnbarr Casey right
Unoriginal
Chris P Bacon your username is u original 😂
@Ivan Schlotzky that's true
😂😂🤣🤣🤣
she protecc
she attacc
but most importantly...
she wants her snack bacc
I just realized my wife is actually a mantis and I am a dead man walking...
And he wasn't heard from again
haha good one
Hello, are you alive?
@J Style Rest in peace to a fallen soldier
ok boomer
Some of the comments are including really funny and clever jokes
This is rare for youtube
özgür uras akkoyun yes people can get over 1k likes for repeating a line
özgür uras akkoyun trust me. this is not rare
People are only good at making innopropriate jokes
you must be viewing the wrong channels then
All i just see are people and their comments doing whatever they're prayers are saying to the mantis
This sounds like an avengers reference
“Natasha” and “Bruce”
Lol
Fun fact: Black Widows eat their mates after sex
Brutasha
@@hisashi-reisaberhagen-shak6203 having a snack during sex. One of natures beauties
1:45 Bruce over here clapping cheeks. 😂
Natasha: COME BACK HERE!!!!!!!
Bruce: see ya :)
M Mikix Maximus "If he won't take care of my children, who will?"
M Mikix Maximus oh shut Natasha did not want Bruce to stop XD
Probably her sexual climax is eating Bruce's head.
“He May be short in stature, but the male mantis is surprisingly long on stamina” okay I see what you did there narrator... it’s ON...
Came for culture. Stayed for comments.
Culture? You mean watching mantids mate?
Mantids are such beautiful and unique creatures. I love to find them in the summer and fall.
1 day of love-making. Goddamn.
SHES A MAN EATER!
deo387 Oh-ohh, here she comes, watch out boy, she'll chew you up.
deo387 Thanks, now that song is going to proceed to play in my head for the rest of the week.
Hex Maniac Gabby No problem
deo387 ?!?!?!?!?!
Dat reference 😊
0:40 LAST MAN STANDING
Imanol Saldana Complete the mission
Bruce was like "hell no I need round 2!".
Instead of becoming Dinner, Bruce became the first winner
the reason he tapped her on the back is because he so small he cant connect his abdomen to hers. so he taps her requesting that she moves her abdomen to the right so he can reach her. also sexual canniblism is rare with that species so he would've been fine especially if you fed her allot.
haha lol true
Feli Kun was she a Mantis or a girl cuz they both do that 😂
Not really. Remember that the other male mantes were already eaten by that one female mantis. So, the odds are clearly against him. He clearly needed human intervention to survive.
Phantom Shinobi so its complete click bait
Phantom Shinobi no that’s wrong. Completely canibalism is very common in these sp and also the tapping is to calm.
All other male mantis die from snu snu.😂😂🤣
OMG I LAUGHED SO DAMN HARD!! 😂🤣😂🤣😂
Futurama :D
Bruce: (Is thirsty)
Natasha: (Is hungry)
My man Bruce getting some
He knows the motto called HAKUNA MATATA
Boink your date then relocate.
Bruce Banner
Natasha Romanoff.
Fitting analogy.
But the irony in the naming
I agree man
“They have been mating continuously for the last 24 hours”... I wouldn’t mind dying after that.
Kids...
Be like Bruce.
Wolfsberg ok👌
I wish I could last 24 hours
Crusty Doodlesack 😂😂😂
I can :3
ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ ItzMoonPie The cat ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ Bitch i bet you can't last 30 seconds shut the fuck up.
Crusty Doodlesack same
Hi I'm Phil lmaoooo
Wow theyre like real life women.
women eat the men's money
little insurance money and some hawt sauce
5 stars
SaintDre7 lol
Child support
EpicGameGalHD even the szechuan sauce?
meanwhile for humans, being married increases a dude's expected lifespan
U sure aboutthT
@@jonathanlavis7447 yea
Hit and Run
more like rape and escape
Vince 0509 Shoot and Scoot.
Smash & Dash
Video was very informative. And the girl with the glasses, very cute and even cuter smile. She seemed very passionate about the mantis and their mating ritual.
Luis Garza agreed she is CUTE
How to seem really creepy
Luis Garza her name pleaseeee
just try getting on her back...
Bitch was hot af
Bruce was loosening them ankles n still lived!! Shidd #Belikebruce!
And then Bruce joins the MGTOW movement- Mantis Going Their Own Way
more like Mantis Going To Own Whores
Mantis getting Triggered by woman
Criminally-underrated comment
Don't mind me just putting a bookmark here, so I can come back, and read these funny comments 😂💀💀
zkyvn _ Wait how do you marked a video?
An Nguyen No, the comment is left as a reminder, or can make a list, and add the video.
Same here...
Same
Natasha didnt want Bruce to go no where. He was taming that mantis booty... She was mad the zoo keeper took her boy toy away.. lol
Tavon Charles She was mad she didn’t get to take a bite out of him...literally.
Kawaii Panda she had all the time in the world and she missed her chance.. i mean doing it for that long.. she was liking it
Dude they kill and eat the males no matter what. it takes forever normally anyways
I’m the human equivalent of Bruce!
Too short for girls....the only difference is that he gets to smash!! 😭😭😭😭😭
Don't worry Alex... You'll smash one day.
sad nigga hours
You just need to find a short girl. There's lots of them. Also, have more confidence to make up for being a smol guy. Chicks dig a confident guy. You can fake it until its real.
@@danielleliwag1936 lol
@@nathanb5579 short girls want 6 feet tall boys
"Hey! I was saving him for desert!"
"Worst dinner date ever."
At least he’s safe!
damn bruce must have been really backed up.
Awww, Bruce stayed with her even after mating. He didn't look like he wanted to escape!
X-RAPTORR He was suicidal
lol
this made my day
Bruce: Doesn't matter, can has sex. Me Likely!
X-RAPTORR no sudden movements if he moved she would have tried to snatch him 🤣
Stamina ladies.....Its all about the stamina XD
Bruce representing for the short kings 🔥🔥
BRUCE IS SO CUTE
Catz Craz-E ikr
Bruce is the true macho lol
Bruce hit that g-spot
What's interesting is that Bruce didn't seem like he wanted to let go either, even though he's facing almost certain death - his nature requires him to stay there until the female's gonna snatch at him