@@lunamartinezzz Streamer Atrioc accidentally showed his tabs on stream, and one of them was deepfake porn of his streamer colleagues, well basically his friends.
@@piyushsharma3991 I didn't get to read it either, but i assume they delete it because they don't want to encourage this behaviour and let us follow down this curiosity and search for that stuff.
As a male victim of revenge porn , I completely understand the feeling. I was in high school and became extremely depressed. I feel so bad for these women as I had tons of support I can’t imagine what it would be like to have people tell you , you shouldn’t be upset . It’s disgusting and disheartening
There’s a huge gap between revenge porn and deepfaking. Revenge form has to do with a sexual act being non-consensually filmed and distributed without consent or monetary compensation. Deepfake porn has 0 interaction between the Internet personality and the act. It uses their likeness, but as long as it’s known that it’s not really them, it shouldn’t be considered wrong. Maybe it hurts that the streamers in question are offended, but it comes with the territory.
@@marcalva6316 Well you just summed the whole issue of deepfakes which is that for many it is not known that it's not the person and that is the aim there. It is wrong no matter what. And it absolutely shouldn't come with the territory and it's not a justification
nobody is telling them "you shouldn’t be upset", most of the critism on qt's reaction is being overly upset like she was r*p*d or assaulted, like the statement "this is what pain looks like", there levels to everything and the deepfake stuff does not match with her reaction, it wouldve been way more understandable if it was revenge porn with her actual body doing sexual things
@@marcalva6316 If this is some kind of joke, it must be in poor taste because: 1) 2:12 literally explains the study results that prove the damage to the streamers is more than just "feeling offended" (over 50% of victims have suicidal ideations) 2) 13:48 recontextualizes deepfake porn as "another box checked in a parasocial relationship" (which damages the consumers of deepfake porn by disconnecting/further distancing them from non-parasocial relationships). PSA: Harmful jokes on a serious subject aren't funny. If you genuinely didn't watch the video before commenting, I left relevant timestamps.
Male victim of SA here. Learning the shame and hurt and fear and loathing I experienced after being assaulted weren't pains unique to my experiemce galvanized my ability to empathize. I came from a pretty messed up home (score super high on adverse childhood experiences, for those in the know), and i still struggle in a lot of ways, but there is something liberating in being able to affirm to someone else that the shit they're dealing with is an indignity, that they can hurt and shouldn't be ashamed by that hurt. Not in a "let me be your white knight" kinda way, but being able to turn my self awareness outward to be present with someone else and use it to grok a more nuanced picture of that other human being's external and internal life.
I can really tell you’ve processed this in a very constructive way in order for you to heal and deal with the hurt and pain. I am a female victim of SA who has been in therapy since I was 10, I turn 21 this year. I cant believe Ive been in therapy half my life, but it’s gotten me here. I can see something really familiar in your words, that I’ve worked through myself as well. Thank you for sharing your experience and journey.
I feel like the extreme lack of empathy on the internet has been steadily getting worse and now it is leaking out into real life and it's honestly terrifying. Thank you for speaking out on this topic. I feel like you really hit the nail on the head with this.
Its hard to empathize when someone has no been directly physically affected. Artist use real people as reference for their art and suddenly someone can claim to be injured by another persons work. This guy is equating to being unconsciously raped to ones who have seen physical imitations of themselves. His argument is, "studies have shown what it can do to the human mind", well there a lot of stuff that can do to the human mind, like for example getting enraged over Hogwarts and screaming because Trump won.
“If you’re a man who feels judged by a woman who won’t give him a chance, think about what must have happened in that woman’s life…Men are becoming better and better at deception…” Dr. K, this is the first time I’ve ever heard a man formulate this in this way, with empathy. I appreciate you, your clarity, and your dedication to getting others in touch with their own humanity.
@@dend1 yep exactly, ppl are always just focusing on the WRONG stuff, only makes theirs' and others' lives much worse, and social media just 100 timed it man i hate the internet cuz of this, BUT if not for me being on yt, i would have never come across dr k and other knowledgeable content, im grateful but man... this is just sad
"we are screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who doesn't deserve it" 25:38 been living by this for the last couple years it has saved me from much hurt. So glad someone finally said it. amazing video
I often think about this too, the chain of resentment and abuse can only be broken by kindness, even when you dont think they deserve it (and sometimes they truly do)
This is how I've always done in life and despite thinking it was a good thing to do, there were times where it feels like I'm siding with the opponent I'm being nice to, which may feel like I'm betraying the people I'm actually siding with. This deterred me into not doing it as much. But after this guy told me that this is a real necessity that could do waves... wow, it just really motivates me into doing it more and more. Not, of course, to side with the "opponent", but to treat them as much care as I did to the victims, because from what I've learned so far (and was emphasized from this video), is that they are also victims themselves. Make them place their fingers on the heart where all that resentment and hurt is coming from. Shit like this just makes me want to work myself to become more helpful and kinder to others.
@@Phoenix.Sparkles Does the child abuser deserve that kindness you offer? What about the Serial killers and R*pists? Do they deserve your kindness too?
Thank you for sharing this message. I met a girl who was a victim. They weren't even adult content pictures, just beach photos. But them put on a revenge porn forum and finding out sent her spiraling for years. She gained 80lbs just so Noone could possibly recognize her from those photos. Hopefully laws around this become much more strict around this.
@@FreneticFolklore well... our brains aren't wired for forums and social media and sometimes people don't know how things will make them react :( ----and how do you know she'll never meet these people irl? It was most likely put up by someone she knows irl. She might now have a crippling paranoia that anyone she meets has seen these pictures and whatever nasty story went with them. The perpetrator might have SEO optimized that shit so it comes up in a background check :( How did it get back to her? There's a good chance that the perpetrator made sure it stung, putting the "revenge" in revenge porn "first world problems"... many people from impoverished developing nations are horrified by what they describe as "spiritual hostility" in first world nations
I’m so sorry that happened to her-similar thing happened to my friend but they were some nudes the dude doxxed her college info too and it ruined her career for a while and she also had to change her name cuz people were stalking and harassing her online.
@The Midnight Library that's exactly the callous response the video was telling you to self reflect on. And you will probably never be in that situation. And it's not 5 people. That photo probably was copied and circulated in other places too. And at 18 years old your you are still kind of a child
My GF brought this deep fake drama up a few days ago. I had to say I was shocked of the responses some were giving. I’m not even that much of an emotional dude and even I had to question how do these people lack the empathy to realize why a victim of deep fake porn would feel devastated. I fear for the newer generation tbh
@@Egocentrism245 Idk where you’re coming from with this “ez difficulty” crap, but all I’m saying is it doesn’t take much brain power to figure out why someone would be devastated to find out someone used their image for deep fake porn. The persons status is irrelevant - it’s called basic human decency. Just imagine if it was your mom, sister, or another loved ones image used against their will for porn. It’s fundamentally wrong.
@@Egocentrism245 You’re making a lot of assumptions there buddy. Having a GF doesn’t mean she is thinking for me - I was presented with the situation and responded accordingly. Calling someone “sheep blue pill” for having a conscious just shows you need to get off the internet and touch grass.
Ex-cam model here. There are a lot of serious considerations you make when deciding to take part in adult media. Will family find out? Will future partners find out? Will future employers find out? Am I emotionally ready and willing to broadcast myself in this way? Am I at too much a risk of picking up a stalker? The only reason that my camming experience was anything more than traumatizing was because my answer to all those questions was "I'm cool with it." And coming to that place of being "cool with it" didn't just come from nowhere, either. It took months of careful consideration, of emotional processing and preparation. I can't imagine being in a situation where that kind of material is made about me without my consent. That sounds hellish. Consent is everything, especially with matters involving sex.
@@ezaf5989 you realise that your comments are bullying, right? I don't know what you get from this, but consider if you really want to be that person in the discussion.
@@dande-lion its fucking maddening, I see this shit everywhere. Basically every Instagram post featuring a woman sharing her story/opinion/perspective is filled with intolerant, misogynistic crap like his comment. I think Dr. K hit the nail on the goddamn head here, we are suffering a crisis, and the indoctrination of male youth by red-pill manosphere types is just adding fuel to an already existing and growing bushfire
often people are too easily scared by new technologies... deepfake is a different case. Deepfake was always a bad idea, both on paper and in real life. The memes are not worth it.
The problem is that the general public doesn't take things seriously until it's actually here. Whether it's privacy, or AI, or even growing political movements... it's always "oh that will never happen!" until it actually does, despite any amount of evidence you show them.
I’m a woman with ASD level 1 and have CPTSD. I do NOT treat people like that. People need to take responsibility and be kind despite what happened to them. Women are people, too. We are bullied constantly, go through the same stuff. I am tired of people telling women they have no stress. The comment about the person hearing lots of people hearing bullies bully them happens to me on a weekly basis. But I don’t do revenge porn or any any revenge. No one is there for me now. I am resentful. But I remember that pain and don’t want to inflict it on others. So I don’t accept that as an excuse. I say they need to grow up and improve themselves. I did a lot of improvement on myself to make people interested. Now I don’t believe people when they compliment me. It’s shocking to me. But it does prove that people can like you if you are at your best.
I'm a man who has level 1 ASD, and I agree. One of the most frustrating things is when people try using their disabilities or experiences to absolve judgment. Having been falsely accused by a girl in my previous university of stalking her isn't something that I would take revenge for even after being told I could file a claim against her. I wouldn't hold any other woman accountable for this either, although I'd be lying if I said it's had no impact on my interactions with women. I'm sorry that you have no one, I know first-hand how hard it can be to deal with stressful situations, but have no one to turn to. I hope things get better for you.
Thank you, precisely why many me are fed up. Women have been infantilized by society and are not held to the same standards as men are being held to. So of course it creates resentment from men. And that's not even to say women don't have their own issues that they have to deal because they do. But excusing bad behavior just because bad behavior was done to them isn't how to address it.
Hey, this comment really spoke to me for a few reasons not relating directly to me but to a relationship I had with a person in a similar situation to what you've described. Would you mind answering some questions? As to what you said in the second part: I'm really sorry you don't have anyone there for you right now. And I also understand you don't believe people when they compliment you in any way, you think they're lying to you I am assuming? But, again having been in a relationship for a short while with someone in a very similar position to you, I can tell you that most of those compliments are true. I really get that it's a shock that anyone could think of you in a positive way, because you've experienced different for so long (I'm assuming?), but honestly that just proves how incredibly far you have come on your journey to healing. My relationship ended by the fact that this person was not yet ready to let go of the vengeful thoughts, anger and pure fury they felt for those who harmed them and as a result was closed off to my own feelings in the relationship because 'I've been mistreated so long that it's unfair that I still have to apologise or feel sorry [for things that I've done/have happened to others].'. And I get it, I truly do. But that's not something I am able to deal with in a relationship. I digress; To hear you say that you are resentful but you have worked on yourself to still have the ability to show empathy for others, is truly a HUGE accomplishment. Be proud of yourself for that! You probably still have a long ways to go, but hey. You're strong and you've come this far! And I'll tell you again, I know it's difficult to accept compliments, but they are usually true.
I also have CPTSD. I don't do things like that either. But I do struggle with resentment and hypervigilance and feeling extreme anger and fear when I get triggered/reminded of the past. I do feel a lot of empathy for people but if I'm intimidated/afraid it's like a wall comes up and I become hostile I hope it gets better with time I am still healing from fresh wounds I can't afford therapy
Finally a sane take in this community, it’s honestly depressing that the only male streamers that have reliably made empathetic takes are Dr. K, Ludwig, and Charlie.
I don't think disagreeing that it *should* be so upsetting is an inherently unempathetic take, I understand why someone *might* be upset about something like this I just don't think it's reasonable- which is totally fine btw people are unreasonable sometimes it comes with the territory
He didn't say anything of value. Do you really think that telling people on the internet "Hey, don't exploit these hot pictures of said person because she doesn't consent", that it will work ? You're out of your mind of you think that. Especially when you're talking about stuff which are accessible in 2 seconds. OFCOURSE people will exploit them. This is the real world. Bad People are out there. I would really appreciate it if he said something like " Do not post your picture in the internet ESPECIALLY children" AT ALL. That would be a good advice because this is a reasonable precautions you can take. If you preach to the fire how burning is bad and barbaric all day, fire will always burn. Instead, take precautions from the fire.
@@theoathman8188 To say empathy has no value is absolutely insane. Dr. K has experience with this particular moral bankruptcy. That is like half his channel. However the purpose of sharing the emotional impact is to educate the unaffected about the effects of their indulgence. Obviously most people who ENDORSE it will not shift their worldview in the face of empathy. This is different for the ignorant. Dr K's empathy has potential to allow those addicted to potential non consensual sw into perspective. It is Pokimane's passion and job to stream. People will inevitably find her attractive. This obviously doesn't mean she should quit her job. Most deepfakes are of people already in non sw industries. What the empathy and perspective does however, is to project the consequences and emotions of nonconseual videos upon those who are addicted to it, as those who indulge in the videos likely do not consider it as such. Its not for the producers. We all know they're long gone. Moreover, public outcry over such videos has actually caused uproar in legal considerations before. It is vital we spread this message so that women do not have to rely on flimsy copyright law to protect their faces from being plastered in sexual videos. It was just as vital to prevent revenge porn and fight back on that too in western countries. It is important as people, for lawmakers to hear it from victims, and to hear the effects and research.
18:59 - 20:20 is so very profound. It's almost a disservice to have it so deep in the video. This needs to get clipped and shipped across the internet. So very powerful. This is succinct enough I think to try and convince people who do not feel the privilege that is prescribed to them to understand their actions.
I’m probably much older than your average viewer and my gaming habits haven’t been disruptive to my life, but I appreciate the thoughtful, direct, no nonsense way you’re talking about the value of empathy and compassion.
@@RoseKnowss if you go to the bar under the video with like and share and scroll it to the left, you'll see a thanks button for donations (on mobile anyway, probably in the same place on desktop).
I'm almost 35 and I watch your content because it's one of the only positive places online for such an audience. Although I don't struggle with most topics, I am a recovering heroin addict who was homeless the last few years of my addiction but finally, after almost two decades on heroin, I got sober. I get bummed out with the state of youth on the internet (and adults lol) but your content gives me some much needed hope. People can make a positive change, I know. I just celebrated 2.5 years off heroin Jan 31st. Keep making positive content Dr. K!! We all need it.
I've never had any business with drugs, but I think Im also an addict Just addicted to a different thing - the internet and technology. So... Yeah, that sounds impressive to me, thanks for sharingn
I am so glad you brought up the cycle where men *are* having a harder time connecting and finding partners but ALSO seeing the fact that women’s distrust is necessary for their safety - a viciouscycle of loneliness and pain on both parts. But yes, blaming women is not the point or the way out.
It's a garbage argument. The issue is often more social isolation and not being experienced interacting with others boundaries..e.g. respecting and probing for consent. Also women are just on average more afraid and the fear can be based on social media rather than reality. I suspect a more real issue online dating thar makes respecting boundaries less real and less worthwhile.
@@tomwright9904 no I barely go outside I’m just like that lol and the few times I have with friends I’ve still had way to many encounters w genuinely creepy men as an underaged girl you say social media as if the things there aren’t reflective of real life the amount of harassment I’ve heard from my friends and people even younger than me around me even if they are innocent and don’t try to do anything out of their age range and look their age is terrifying women being on average more afraid just makes no sense? You say that like it’s a fact that is not connected to the things we go through we’re on average more afraid because we’re on average the victims of uncomfortable situations and sexual harassment
@@tomwright9904 Oh trust me our fear has been around long before social media. Men know too what some men are capable of, or why else are dads extra protective of their daughters? Why are brothers always looking out for their sisters? Unfortunately most of us girls are raised from the start to be wary of strangers, how to look out for dangerous situations, creeps etc. And thank god for those kind of lectures, because even as a young girl I’ve only narrowly avoided certain situations and shady people. Imagine getting catcalled while you’re underage and walking in your school uniform. Getting stared at or touched. For alot of young girls this is a reality and therefore a fear they also take with them into adulthood, since it doesn’t stop there
I think deepfake porn should just be straight up illegal tbh. As Dr K said it nt only damages the person being deepfaked but the person watching it. Its exactly like smoking. Capitalism has found another way to make money out of suffering.
@@albal156 I think that banning deepfake porn from being made entirely would be extremely difficult to enforce. But if there’s a practical way to do that then yes it should be illegal.
@@brimstoner982 yeah getting it banned from being made would be incredibly hard. Getting it banned from being seen is slightly (and only slightly) less difficult. We could try a law that any porn site where viewers upload videos must immediately remove and report any individual that uploads a deepfake. So let's say hypothetically that actually works, we now have excellent monitoring on porn sites, videos are flagged and removed. The next issue is deepfakers making their own websites to upload to. How do we stop that? Okay, we could try a law that any paid/free hosts must monitor video content uploaded to their servers (which is a lot to ask of them), however that doesn't stop someone from running their own private server from their home. All you need is server software on a hard drive you don't mind running 24/7. *Maybe* restricting access to the point where they have to host their own content could drive enough deepfakers to not want to bother. But it's not a absolute solution. If individuals could report websites to whatever internet provider they're under that might help. Then again as soon as you involve VPNs that get's way harder to do.
As someone who is currently a bit of a loner, AI has personally elevated my life significantly in hobby, career, and creative pursuits. I have yet to see any of the negatives of AI.
@@ratchetandchank8648 it's because AI is expensive to develop, so all the companies that have the resources to make it are asking the question "Can I use it to reduce my overhead?" ie people.
@@cheetman1 I’m glad it’s helped you improve your life, but just because it’s helped you doesn’t mean it hasn’t had deeply negative effects on other people’s lives. There are multiple prominent artists whose entire portfolios have been fed as raw data to generators like stable diffusion and midjourney, either without permission or expressly against their wishes.
What a great video! At the start of the pandemic, I was a guy full of hate, rage, envy, sadness, and loneliness through others and myself. Today I can say I learned to love and to have patience with myself. Healthygamer had a significant influence on me to make that happen. Let's don't give up hope. I think we all can get better :) I'm genuinely thankful for this community, the healthyGamer's staff and coaches, Kruti and, obviously, for Dr.k.
Yeah I'm currently there rn. I have no idea how to get out and I'm also a teenager so legit everybody just says it's puberty and no one cares. Let's hope that changes one day.
I once had someone impersonate me on Discord with the same username (just a different tag number) and the same profile picture, spamming people with insults in dms and whatever as a sort of revenge for ignoring the impersonator's advances. That alone made me rage, frustrated, pissed and annoyed so much that it's hardly believable even though everyone involved knew after a few moments that it wasn't me. Deepfake or revenge porn is probably a lot worse. It's hard to imagine how much it affects you until you've been in such a situation.
@@mysticflow467 You'd always be mad about it even if you know it's going to happen eventually. You might have less of an initial shock if you're prepared for it, but you'd still be very agitated and frustrated. There's just a profound feeling of rage and powerlessness if someone impersonates you and you cannot do anything about it. And it's not like some small comedy sketch either and neither is deepfake.
We don't have to imagine, deepfakes are in essence edited videos that existed for decades it is just easier nowadays than it used to be 5 years ago through machine learning algos and way way easier than 10 years ago. Edited faces of celebrities on pornography was easily accessible for years now but no one batted an eye now all of a sudden it's something extremely disgusting that we should do something right now !!!! I don't say that it's not a problem but the sudden realization that this thing exists is hypocritical, people used it as a way to get clicks on their videos and news sites.
@@silotx that’s because more people are aware of these things now. personally i knew the existence of deepfakes but i thought we had strict laws that put the victims of such videos in an advantage if they decide to sue. but nevertheless its great that people are speaking up about how this is immoral. just because they didn’t do it sooner that doesnt mean they should not do it at all your logic makes 0 sense
There was a big case in France where a woman job-hunted for a few years until she found out the reason no one was hiring her was a small ring of resentful people who created fake social media profiles, impersonated her and spread misinformation. It took months for state-mandated experts to take off most of the stuff. I can't even imagine how it felt when she learned the truth, even though I hope it was partially relief at the reason not being worst luck ever plus her resume being fundamentally broken.
This is such an important video!! I had a friend who responded with ambivalence regarding the most recent Deepfake situation. He took the stance of, "It's better and less damaging then sexually harrassing people irl" and "People legally have a right to do what they want in their spare time." He then asked me why I was so disgusted with the whole concept of Deepfake, and I admittedly did not have a great counterarguement beyond, "Neither of us know for sure it's not damaging to people involved... and in general it just feels REALLY, REALLY, wrong to make porn of people without their consent. Like there's no way it can feel this wrong and be OK." You did an amazing job presenting what those feelings were trying to communicate in a logical, constructive, and empathetic way. I'll be sharing this with my friends, when appropriate, to continue the conversation. Thank you for everything you do!
@@killertruth186 Good point! While not 1-1, I feel this this discourse is somewhat reminiscent of the debate regarding whether or not it is appropriate to show fictional minors in compromising situations. Defenders of both seem hung up on the idea that it should not be able to do harm because it isn't "real." Moreover, not only is it not a problem, but a potential safeguard to preventing "real" tragedies from occurring. I'm not expert on either, but from what little I know, I think science is saying otherwise.
@@killertruth186 oh god that one didn't even cross my mind. I can sadly already imagine disgusting people saying stuff like "but it's not a real minor, that means it's not actually real cp" or some other abhorrent shit, just like they already do with lolis🤢🤢
Don't know if this makes sense to anyone else, but the way I imagine someone who finds deepfake porn of themselves would feel is kind of a worse version of how it feels if someone tells everyone you know that you said or did something really bad or embarassing that you never actually did. Like if a bully befriends all of your friends and then tells them shit about you that is not true, but now everyone believes it. But even worse than that.
Like the digital (edit:visual) version of malicious gossip. I've always ignored gossip and have been lucky enough not to be drastically affected by it, but the deepfake stuff is on another level. If we all just ignored it, it would lose all it's power, which is how I've always felt about verbal gossip too, but it's hard to get the whole world on board with that
This exact situation happened to me in High School. A dude told everyone I gave him a bl*w job in the park next to the school and everyone believed it. The girlfriend of said dude was one of my best friends at the time and she never spoke to me again. I felt so helpless, depressed and defeated that no one believed me and the other dude just got away with ruining so many of my friendships (and potentially even future relationships because so many heard the rumor) simply because he wanted to use me as a means of winning brownie points with his buddies. He NEVER apologized. He never felt an ounce of regret or remorse. If anything he got some weird satisfaction out of ruining my freshman year.
The only issue is that the majority of people are aware that they're fake. The websites usually have the word deepfake on them, like the guy who just quit because of this (mrdeepfakes)
I have had the opposite experience. I was accused of SA and it took a very long time and a whole lot of money to prove that i was literally on the other side of the country when she said it happened. It took even longer to get the accusation off my record. If she had used a deepfake as evidence, that process would have been 10x worse for me. And no, she faced no repercussions for the false accusation.
Get your 1's in with em. Hopefully legal system can work in like a class action lawsuit or defimation lawsuit against spreaders of known nonconsensuial(idk long ass word) pornography will be reigned in on a national level forcing a precedence in legislation
Someone made porn with my 7th grade school photos. With Photoshop, back in the day. A family member did this, and every one else told me to forgive him because "he hadn't actually touched you". I don't date and I'll probably never have children. Realizing there is something so wrong with me that my parent wanted to ... I feel broken by this. This is an awful thing to do people.
You've changed my mind about this, me personally I've never been interested in consuming deepfake porn or really porn in general as of lately. But my attitude toward this was more like the relationship between a drug dealer and the consumer. I can't blame/be shocked that the consumer is taking in this stuff, so unless these sites are gone I had a lack of empathy where I thought people should know that this would happen. But after watching this video I've learned that I should be more emotionally understanding to other people put in that position.
@@LadyMorrigan I think people like us who is a part of Dr K's community seem to be generally open minded people. You want to avoid following a single narrative especially in this day and age imo. Thanks for the kind words though!
@@TripnotizeVM I agree completely. I think people should really always be willing to consider other opinions and positions, even if they at first seem wrong to you. Have a great day!
Same to me as well. I'm just 16y.o. boy and all my life I have zero empathy until I saw something that didn't bother me but my rational brain thought shouldn't I be empathetic to this thing then I just started questioning my emotions and why I feel none. That moment I feel like my hidden/buried emotions started to show I suddenly feel emotional yet can't cry like something is hiding my emotions and just trying to stop me from crying. I still try to be empathetic and gain emotions because that's what makes us human but it's hard when your taught to not have emotions.
I've seen men devalue women when a tragic thing happens to them. I've also seen women telling men that they are not being "a man" in situations. The lack of compassion scares me. This is the reason why people don't share their emotions to anyone anymore.
It's worse when we realize it's all around us. It's almost unavoidable... Another comment said that unnecessary kindness is the only hope to stop unnecessary hate.
It feels like we separated into tribes, and one side started attacking the other. Then the other tribe retaliated, and we're stuck in escalation and petty arguments and distractions. One small minority showed complete lack of compassion. And now it's escalated to the point where we're all screwed.
@@oshawott4544 Yeah the only hope is just trying to escape it all, because the problem is so big that some good Samaritan isn't gonna magically fix it. I don't understand why we live in a world like this.
@E The black and white thinking is unfortunately our programming from a young age now. It's getting worse with the advent of gender and race education, people obsessed with combating hate with more hate.
Fucking thank you! I have been screaming this my entire recent life. This is a spiral effect that will never stop unless we do something about it. And the AMOUNT OF TIMES I'VE BEEN TOLD "It's not your job" or "This is unhealthy, people shouldn't do this" or my favorite "You're just a simp" when I do it for EVERYONE! It's not only a disregard for compassion now a days, people are actively trying to discourage it, belittle those who reach out, and make them believe they're actually hurting people by trying to help. It sickens me any time I have to hear this. And just... thank you. Thank you for using your platform to talk about this.
It's all about breaking the cycle of hate. The best thing you can do is be the best human you can be and hope your empathy rubs off on others because we've all been hurt/are hurting. We live in a society that stigmatizes compassion for others. Calling others a simp or a pick-me girl for being empathetic to the plight of the opposite gender.
Compassion has little to negative value now. Its because of fearmongering, we all feel so exposed and afraid all the time, everything seems like an attack on the self, and hence if i try to show compassion to the "other side", I am betraying my side, I am a traitor to my side and a spy to the other, I am a double agent, because we are at war. Its amazing how with the rise of such mass media and social media and all the resources of communication, we are failing so spectacularly at actual communication, because all of this can be solved if only we started to listen. The only antidote to this extreme fear and hate is compassion, and that is prohibited. All I can do is try to speak to all the compassionate people in the world- Thank you, you are the warriors that will deliver us from this hell, you are the only ones trying to keep this circus together, and you are getting attacked by all sides for this. We see you for your courage and sacrifice, because you are prioritising 'need' over 'deserve'.
Great timing! That whole scenario about deepfakes made me extremely uncomfortable, and made me so sad for the girls involved (especially because they’ve expressed their disdain for being sexualized without their consent. I’m honestly afraid to post my face on the internet because of these kinds of technology. It’s a really cruel world
dont mean to be that guy, but its not just girls involved. even moistcritikal who made a huge video on it going through the situation has had deepfakes made of himself, except you could argue its even worse in his case considering he is a straight man and the 'activities' these people had his deepfake performing were homosexual gangbangs
At this point posting pictures of yourself on the net has become extremely dangerous (again). Porn isn't the only problem, with those AI programs you can be shown to do pretty much anything, so someone could create a video of you committing a crime. If your voice is also available they can even create a confession video to that crime. Porn is by far not the worst that can happen
It also made me uncomfortable and I have to agree to Dr K - I realized that being so uncomfortable is also a result of feeling connected to all these people und thus part of a parasocial relationship. Why do we feel so involved in all these streamer dramas? Here's the answer.
@@simpsonovci95142 it was just brought to light by a youtuber accidentally showing he paid for a site. also the technology is getting exponentially better (well worse for its victims).
I'm glad you're covering this topic considering many twitch viewers seemed so unbothered by the whole thing, and you can have a great impact on young men
@@zyndustry No, a lot of men have been very vocal that they think it's stupid that the women are reacting negatively. They have no compassion for it whatsoever.
@zyndustry I've seen many people (mostly men) talk about how it's inevitable and the women affected should just suck it up since "its part of being a public figure"
sorry if my question seems kinda pushy, I really dont mean to dig but what happened?`I understand that this topic is harmful to people, could have guessed so before this video but why is it relevant now? Did something in particular happen or is this just general information
Thank you so much for this video. I've been having paralyzing fear and anxiety over some pictures I had shared with an ex I didn't end in good term with although he never threatened with those ever. I was 18 and stupid and seeked his validation. Broke up at 22, and now at 25 I'm crippled by the fear of how badly it could affect my career if any of that lands up in the hands of the people who can impact my life. And for months I've been reading every other post on the internet about what happens to the people this happened to, how their career got ruined, and really nothing looks hopeful. I'm scared, way too scared at this point to even function properly let alone progress on my career.
i know your feeling. i shared my photos with someone for 8ish years, i was groomed my entire teens by him he was way older, and only when i turned 19 i realised how messed up it all was and i left. although he hasnt threatened me or anything, i am really scared that he will someday release those images. i know it would land him in trouble since i was young, but im scared he might release the photos i sent after turning 18. im an artist trying to build an online audience but i get really demotivated because he knows my accounts and im scared someday he will cripple all my effort and spread my images online or to my family with my username tagged. i want to start over and just make new accounts but he knows my real name so he can find me. i feel unfair not even being able to use my name online anymore due to the fear
@@mimikyu_ oh god! My heart goes out to you, I really don't know how anything can be done to protect us from the fear of humiliation and shaming, the world will tell us we deserve it for being naive. I like to believe no situation should be hard enough to keep someone who had no malicious intent down. However like he discusses in this video these crimes, the very public nature of it has never been experienced by humans ever before, we never truly know how it will unfold for every individual. Here's to hoping we stay safe and protected.
That's really rough. Look, let's be honest. No one knows what the future holds. We can only hope for the best and prepare for the worst. But, you really should not continue to read about this stuff because it's not healthy for your well-being. Anxiety is like a beast that wishes to be fed and is never satisfied...
I don’t know if this will make you feel any better but I’m in a similar situation on the opposite side. I dated someone when I was a teenager, got engaged to them and we broke it off when I was 22. We had made numerous videos together, hundreds that I had saved on my phone. The relationship ended very poorly and we haven’t talked since. As someone who has access to those kinds videos on an old phone, I have NEVER thought of doing that to her. No matter how much I hated her at the time, and sometimes do still have negative feelings towards her, there is nothing she could do to me that would make me feel like it’s ok to share those videos anywhere. I think most people understand the weight of sharing those things, and that understanding only grows with age. It’s likely that if you’ve grown as a person, they have too. You don’t have to, and I won’t presume to know your situation, but if it’s appropriate I would suggest maybe talking with them about it. Some closure goes a long way, I never got any, and I don’t think she did either, but in my situation I will never know as she still has me blocked on everything since we broke up. If it’s eating away at you as much as it sounds like it is, finding a way to have closure with your ex might be the best course of action. You’re not alone!
@@Blue-zb7fs I can't tell you how much this meant to me, idk how long it will hold up but your comment really gave me some much needed comfort. The thing about my relationship is, I never saw him act so out of character ever in 4 years, from this always calm composed person to a complete wreck, it was hard to trust my judgement of people after that. I did infact try to talk to him about it, after a year of our break up, he didn't try to assure me or dissmiss me neither threatened me, just had an "ya fine whatever I don't give a damn" attitude, so that wasn't much assuring. That door is closed. However, thank you so much for your kind reply. Really means a lot.
SweetAnita provided a perspective about Deepfake I never thought of before. Essentially, Deepfake is making profit off of the copyright of someone else's image, and they're not even compensated for it. This makes for a very interesting debate about passing legislation surrounding Deepfake if they approach it from the angle of copyright law, which will also involve Fair use and privacy law in the conversation. Edit: No one's saying that there aren't other issues regarding Deepfake, nor is copyright the most important one. Deepfake is wrong on so *_many_* levels and profiting from someone else's image and not even compensating them is one of them and is a topic worthy of discussion.
I still think it's disgusting that photographs of people are property of the photographer, and the person photographed has no legal control over that photo, even if they didn't realize they were being photographed at the time. And it's entirely legal to go around taking photos of strangers without their permission, too. Deepfakes are just bringing this to a whole new level... Why doesn't the law consider us to own our own image?
We'll definitely see copyright implications, but that can only partially mitigate the issue. For example, a lot of the stuff being published isn't for profit, it's just out there for free titillation, and as these programs and PCs become more powerful, the paid content will become less and less a part of it. I would not be at all surprised to see apps in the near future that can do real-time deepfaking on any video based on a supplied face. And then what can you do? This genie is out of the bottle, and I don't see any way it's going back.
I mean first and foremost it's breaking the copyright of the initial porn production company and there is no way that you can argue fair use with this. Their whole work is used (background, sound and the bodies of the actor and actress). That's basically like taking a book and replacing one chapter out of 20, that's not fair use.
This is why the sympathizers I’ve seen online for the people involved saying “but poki and maya aren’t lewd streamers!” Is so stupid. So if they did SW they deserve this? If someone stole someone’s idea at work and got a raise for it and then got everyone to see it as their idea they’d be rightfully pissed. But imagine on top of that the idea is your face in sexually compromising situations. It drives me mad that even the people condemning this STILL think that women deserve to be used if they do SW.
I fully agree with the part about people figuring out how to abuse our dopamine system for profit. I feel like this is becoming exponentially worse since I understood these concepts. I feel lucky to have (mostly) grown up in a world without streamers, dating apps and tiktok.
It's the logical expansion of an economic culture that values and rewards exploitation. This has been happening way before the internet and has been made into an urgent crisis due to the internet.
@@major7flat597 probably drugs can still have a stonger impact on an individual level, but since the internet affects so many people you are probably right. To be fair though, I would say that the internet also has many more positive effects than any drug ever could.
Exactly. I hate that I even saw "Feminist men." Saying that it comes with the territory. Yeah, it's understandable that if you're famous in some way people will find you attractive. But I only ever hear this when it's a woman involved. It just translates in my head as: "You should know, there's consequences for being a woman. You should expect that always."
That's a good way of putting it. I have often felt as thought I was being told throughout life that, as a woman, I should expect to be mistreated and I should be flattered by it. I should expect peeping Tom's, I should expect to be pressured to have sex or provide sexual photos, I should expect to be desired to the point that I don't really get a say and that I should be GRATEFUL for being wanted. I don't care how desired I am. The moment you take away my ability to make choices and make my entire life about how people want to have sex with me, you've taken away my individuality and my humanity. I don't want to live that way.
There is suffering in life. Discussing who/what gender suffers more leads us nowhere. In the end we need to sit down with who we consider important in our lives and ask them what do they truly expect of us in a day-to-day basis. If we can deal with what is said, great. If not....we have two options. Work to maintain them in our lives...or cut contact. Up to you, have a great day!😊
I’m commenting because I really want this to be bumped up in the algorithm for as many people as possible. What you’re saying is SO true. We need to really look at ourselves and recognize why we’re okay with hurting other people. This scares me deeply, the state of the world :(
Same. What gives me hope is that there's also good communities and people in this world like Dr. K, who are able to see what's going on and speak up about it. The world is always changing and evolving towards a collective equilibrium
Thank you so much for speaking up about this, seriously. As a woman competing high-level in esports, I've experienced a fair share of uncomfortable interactions and men feeling entitled to my likeness. I can't fathom it being so much worse being part of deepfake porn... it's absolutely horrifying, as is the amount of my peers saying it's not a big deal. "This is not good for anyone involved," absolutely. All around very dangerous behavior.
I think an important point to make along with this is that some of these streamers rely on these kinds of people for their money. I don't disagree with anything Dr. K said in the video, but to play devil's advocate here, many streamers encourage parasocial relationships and prey on these lonely men for donations. That behavior itself has grossed me out on many female streamers to the point where I don't really watch them anymore, the culture of creepy men donating and the streamer going along with it or being nice to make sure they keep that stream of money is very disheartening to me. The point he makes at 22:15 really applies to how these streamers are treating men, so when those parasocial relationships are encouraged, it doesn't surprise me that the lonely men who feel a connection would turn towards something like that. It doesn't make it excusable, but I think pushing an audience away from that behavior as a streamer would do wonders against making stuff like this happen if we're concluding that the parasocial relationship is the reason for incidents like this. I think that's what most mean by "it comes with the territory." Don't know if that'll help with the horror you feel from your peers saying it's not a big deal.
@Alexander Grant FACTS. This is what I was looking for. Discouraging the behavior wouldn't get rid of the problem, but it would definitely decrease it significantly. But sadly these streamers won't do it because it's an easy way to make bank
@@Alexander_Grant I've always tried to be clear with viewers or fans of mine that we're no more than acquaintances unless we actually hang out outside of my content/tournament sets. I'm even asexual and never wear revealing clothing, already in a relationship (engaged), and typically just keep to myself and my friends aside from tweeting lol. Unfortunately even then, I've had to deal with a copious amount of inappropriate interactions with both men and women in person, but of course especially online. I agree that boundaries need to be more clearly set by streamers more, but unfortunately I know from experience that even if you do, some still feel entitled to you. It's rough :/
@@KiwiBurdie Yeah, it's by no fault of yours that those creepy experiences happen, that's certainly something you personally can't completely fix are the creepy ones. Setting boundaries is already much better than a lot of the streamers out there. It'd be interesting to me if Dr. K would actually talk about how to set boundaries as a streamer (unless he's already done it, I didn't watch his streamer interviews, they were boring to me comparing to the regular people) to help those who have this problem, especially since it seems common among female streamers. Thanks for replying, I certainly see your side of things, it seems like what you're saying is Dr. K's idea of parasocial relationships causing this problem may not be the entire issue? Even with not promoting parasocial behavior you still get harassed?
It’s not a balanced opinion and Neutrality is also a bias. He said men are in crisis and specifically centered especially the part at the end around men. Saying be empathetic and nice to people is not balanced idk. It’s right
What an absolute banger. It might be good to do another video or two going more in-depth on how to actually be compassionate towards people when you just feel resentful. It can be a super difficult thing to overcome, even if you're aware of it. Even if you're convinced rationally that it's the right thing to do, it can FEEL so wrong in the moment because you feel like you're being betrayed, not listened to, and that there's a lack of justice or fairness. Personally, I think one step in the right direction is that more people (men and women) need to be encouraged/given opportunities to talk about their feelings without judgment. There's nothing wrong with feeling those things, it's how we act on them that matters, but I think a lot of people just don't ever talk about their feelings in the first place and just skip straight to lashing out. I know that approach has helped me, at least. edit: to clarify, I don't think one should try to have that conversation with the person they're feeling resentful toward, at least not in the middle of the conversation that triggers those feelings. I've learned from experience that in those situations, people often aren't in the right emotional state to listen to YOUR concerns in a nonjudgmental, objective way, and you can just end up making things worse. I'm advocating more for people to find others (therapists, friends, family, coaches) who are willing to listen.
I’ve had enough bad experiences with men that it’s very hard for me to trust them anymore. Watching men tell the victims of deep fake porn that they shouldn’t feel any type of way about it has made it 10 times worse. Most of my bad experiences started with some dude ignoring what I said I was feeling, deciding he knew what I “should” be feeling, and then acting like that’s what I actually *was* feeling. There’s no more reliable signal that I can’t trust someone not to hurt me than that.
I can really understand this, growing up i noticed quite fast that i felt alot more emotional than the guys around me. To a point where i stopped being comfortable around them and felt alot more understood and comfortable around girls, while that did come with occasional extra bullying in school, it didn't really matter because the lack of toxicity and empathy really improved my life alot.
mhmh, i lived with suppressed feelings for a long time, so i didn't realize how bad it was for me to engage in arguments about how i'm feeling. When i say how i feel and the guy i'm talking to disagrees, i really shouldn't try to defend my position with logic about why my past experiences would cause me to feel like that. My feelings are not up for debate. I felt like those men were so condescending in their assumptions that they understand my feelings better than me. It really is mind-boggling how otherwise reasonable people are suddenly so irrational. It is obvious that they have so much less data about the situation.
I am so careful in dating and so suspicious. It's so hard to vet people today. I move at a snails pace and I am always looking for red flags or manipulation. It feels like therr are no good guys left. . . And those that act like and say that they are are the ones that should be trusted the least.
i'm just so scared about my female friends. a lot of them have been in situations where nudes were spread without their knowledge or consent. now add to that that soon people will be able to create fake explicit stuff with their faces on it. this is gonna affect regular ass people so much. a streamer at least has the platform to spread the word that "hey, those are deepfakes" but with regular people it'll just ruin people's lives
Thank you! I'm so glad you made this video. The people who didnt see a problem with it cuz "it's not the real person anyway" or those who say "once you upload an image of yourself in the internet then you consent to people using it" were driving me insane.
@@VullVull You're not incorrect, but you're also giving into exactly what Dr. K describes here. Most of those people are most probably harboring resentment from past experiences and are unloading it on someone they perceive as "better off". If they get to see this video, actually give it a moment of thought, and then they see the comment section dumping on them as lacking any moral standing despite finishing the same video, it's not gonna help them in their introspection. Someone needs to be the first to let it go and offer compassion instead of condemnation for this to even just begin to unravel.
While not giving consent, you're still opening yourself up to the horrors of the internet, consent or not. This is something that needs to be taught by parents AND ECHO'ed in school at an extremely young age. I'll be teaching this to any children I might have.
@@zeke7515 While it's important to protect yourself and be cautious, I think it's more important to address and fix the real issue at hand which is those who make the internet unsafe in the 1st place. Like what causes individuals to act such a way online? They're definitely not well-adjusted people so what issue is going on in their lives that influence them to behave this way?
@@EggEnjoyer It's not impossible it's just more harder than being cautious. Telling victims and potential victims to do all the work of having a fun and safe internet experience is just a flimsy bandaid for the problem, not a cure. Also yes, it's more important to teach people to not be a bad person instead of telling them they're responsible for any harm they experience. I dont think teaching people to protect themselves inherently leads to victim blaming, but if others constantly push the idea that "your safety is your responsibility" (which only teaches us to be cautious) instead of "it's our responsibility as a collective to keep everyone safe" ( which teaches us to be cautious *_and_* to not hurt others) then you get situations where people blame a harmful event caused by someone else on themselves because they failed at self-protection.
I can not understate how comforting it is to hear a man saying these things. I'm literally crying. It's sad that it's so moving to hear someone who actually is compassionate and treats people as autonomous beings entitled to respect and dignity. It shouldn't be so rare but it is and I am grateful for your content and your mission. Thank you so much.
Most people obviously treat the people in their social environment like "autonomous beings entitled to respect and dignity", but with huge numbers of basically unknown people many dissociate from the fact that behind an online image there's an actual person behind it. This happens all the time online. Do you see how we treat each other online? How we insult and berate, how we judge and defame? Most of us would never do this in person and not just because we would see more direct consequences. Similar to how we havent evolved to deal with the hate from 10000s of people, we havent evolved to emotionally image 10000s of people feeling empathy towards them. This can go two ways. One is the one above. The other is people having actual issues with feeling empathy for sometimes millions of people at once. This leads to extreme psychological distress.
@@IsomerSoma Wouldn't it be better for someone to disassociate these images from a real person? Yeah it is in the likeness of the person, but if they believe that it isn't real, it becomes nothing more than fantasy. I know these images are a problem, but there is little we can do about them but to bring awareness to them.
@@IsomerSoma there's a name for this: online disinhibition. people can react to each other with whatever emotion they feel like online, same as irl, but in the absence of immediate, real consequences people feel safer being rude to each other.
@@Zero-9909 What if they can't and they feel suicidal over the non consensual use of their likeness in sexual content? That's a heavy burden to face and what if it's not a streamer at all? What if it's deepfake porn of a regular person that is released and seen by their friends or family or employers. Now they have the burden of proving it's a deepfake and not really them. You think they can just forget it after? This is akin to SA or revenge porn. It's awful and while you might be right that not much can be done I do hope legislation can be passed similar to the ones passed about revenge porn. I think this is going to increase the division in gender relations. I would not be friends with or associate with a man who supports or uses deepfake porn.
I think its important to note that you can be as kind as you want to someone who may have been hurt before, but dont do it at the expense of your own health. you can be kind and still say that you cannot help the way they need it.
This video is desperately needed. This issue and many others inspires my actions as a philosophy student to try to revive empathy. Thank you Dr. K, for being a bastion of hope in the gaming space, your tireless efforts do so much in inspiring me and likely many others!
You know what? There are a lot of people in this world who have not been shown the empathy that they deserved. Who have been abused and mistreated. And yet we manage to treat other people with decency.
@@JB-mh5xy so, again. Treating people with decency is not the same as allowing yourself to be mistreated. Being overly empathic/forgiving/obsequious and being cold/cynical/angry are not the only 2 options. Sounds like you swung from one extreme to the other.
I don't consume in deep fake porn or any of that stuff but I realized from this video how much I do have a bit of a parasocial relationship with some online personalities and really made me think about it. thanks.
Wow, this segment just made me realize I'm damaging myself by carrying on a parasocial relationship with my ex by consuming our old videos. I've personally felt neglected and more resentful of my ex after consuming them even though they are no longer in my life and I know in my mind I cannot have any expectations that come from a relationship.
I am not a victim of revenge porn, but I remember being younger and sending nudes for the first time. I always made sure that my face was censored so no one would recognize me, but I remeber very vividly how I fighted this one guy who I shared my pics with, and being absolutely terrifed of the possibility that he might show my videos to someone else, and post it on the internet. I was extremely anxious, and alone at the time, so all I could do was crying and hoping that no ones sees it.... It's been a while now, and I currently have a boyfriend who I wholeheartly trust, but if one day he posts pictures of me... I have no idea how I'll cope with that. I cannot imagine how it must be for a victim to be humiliated like that, my heart goes to them.
I think it's because no matter how "liberal" a society becomes, us individual people will always still treat sex and related things as taboo / something to be ashamed of... in my opinion this requires much more analysis than done in the video to really get down to the root of the problem. Because people will always have something to be ashamed of, whether it's something they've said, done, their physical appearance or social status, and in part it comes with being aware we are always inadequate no matter who we are. I would like to write a few more paragraphs about this but I really need to think deeper about it and currently don't have the time, so this will have to do for now.
If you keep your bf at good terms when you break up he most likely will still feel a level of attachment meaning that he would be unlikely to just release it and by good terms I mean never insult him or be rude just because you feel like it.
@@--LZ--- The problem is not that we are squamish about sexuality as a society. Or that we're just too easily ashamed. It seems you are hinting at / suggesting that if we were more open and shameless about sex the problem wouldn't be so bad. But you can't and shouldn't abolish shame as a human emotion. Sexual intimacy is intimate and not meant for public consumption. It is normal and healthy to desire privacy about one's sex life. Shame is the natural consequence of revenge porn. That's what makes it so bad in the first place.
@@rolandxb3581 " It seems you are hinting at / suggesting that if we were more open" Were you imagining something while reading what I wrote? You made something up that you imagined and continued to write a comment about it, basically talking to yourself. If you actually read what people write and listen to what they say instead of inserting your own thoughts you might have a fruitful discussion.
@@--LZ--- I do believe if people would be more open about sex, this wouldn’t hurt as much, but we cannot deny the fact that revenge porn, specially for woman, affects her life in a way that could literally destroy her. Losing her job, being humiliated by her family… those are just one of the few things that can happen. For me, the true problem about revenge porn is because sex is a very intimate and private thing, I do not enjoy nor do I consent sharing my pics or videos for everyone to see. It’s a violation of my privacy, and I feel really sad, and disgusted that someone shared it, and the fact that some disgusting person will get off of it. That’s the problem.
I hope that the people who need to hear this hear this. The thing you mentioned about men learning to better manipulate girls in red pill circles of the internet scares me. An old friend of mine that I fell out of touch with has gone hard into that stuff and we’re not close enough for it to feel right for me to call him out on it. But he says stuff about how he’s always manipulating people to get what he wants and he doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with it and it is just scary.
@@JB-mh5xy people forget manipulation has its consequences, and who's to say that friend is happy with himself and his life? sounds like a broken man who's manipulation will repel any real genuine relationships and make him lonelier than he already is
@@naglfar6305 he's not trying to better himself. Trying to achieve short-term and short-lived goals and pleasures maybe, but definitely not trying to help himself.
@@Thierce ultimately red pill is a tool. How you use it is up to you, if you use it for short term pleasure then that is what you'll get. But you could still use those principles for long term goals, people only hate it because of the dating aspect of it, I doubt they'd feel them same if a person used it in academia or the workforce
I clicked this out of curiosity and honestly have never watched or barely even know anything about the Deepfake stuff, but something you said had such a huge impact on me so I felt like making this comment. I find I am often able to write off someone elses pain and not truly empathize with them. This has made it harder for me to connect with people. I need to reflect on where this is coming from for me. I think it could be due to me being an agreeable person that has had my fair share of situations where I am taken advantage of or lied to. Thanks Dr K, appreciate your wisdom and passion.
Im a women who is going through something not quite but very close to this, and the reaction to the deepfakes crushed me. Ive been doing better now, but its still a struggle. I was in therapy but haven't been able to go for awhile for various reasons, but one of the things I have personally been stuck on is my attacker. I don't want to describe the whole situation, but I don't know who my attacker is. They were in the wrong completely, but a part of me still feels empathy and it feels weird. I'm glad you made this video, since I've been so pulled by it. Part of me wishes I could just dismiss the person, but I just can't wish ill on people. Im personally somewhat satisfied by my feelings on it, but I'm glad to have them validated. A part of me hopes that person did grow to be a better person. I don't believe it'll happen necessary, but I can hope.
The fact that businesses (or not) have figured out these things about the human psyche and are exploiting them with every chance they get is increasingly disturbing for me. Psychology is something that people have failed to take seriously for a long time (way before the term was even invented), and that is literally the reason the world is so messed up today.
@@killertruth186 I guess the reason why this has yet to be seen as an actual issue is because all the companies are making the big bucks from it and none of them have the moral backbone to stop doing it and actually start fighting it in whatever way. It is an extremely dirty and short-sighted way of doing business from a moral perspective, and if history has ever taught us anything, is that dirty shortcuts for short-term pleasures bring nothing but long-term catastrophe.
i actually don't think its the reason the world is messed up, thats a pretty complicated set of reasons. it might boil down to a mixture of ignorance and various forms of 'sin' across humanity, though even going into that is a big job, so so many variables
😭A few years ago, I was in a university library trying to pass time, and I was looking for a book on video games, since I had an interest in developing video games. I was hoping for any kind of book on the history of video games, maybe something about level design, even about psychological damage caused by video games. Heck, even a tiny book from the 80's about making games in BASIC would have interested me 😅 They had ONE book under non-fiction: video games It was about *gamification*, not video games and it was a book on all the ways you can psychologically imprison and trick people so they keep using your product "use this kind of timer to create urgency", "give badges but space them out farther each time", "try using these colors", "use a sense of personal connection by using these elements..." it was horrific and it scared me, I felt like I had opened a book of black magic it was also EVERYTHING I hated about mobile games and their stupid manipulative in app purchases of course the examples in the book were all "beneficial" like elearning, but it was clearly targeted at increasing consumption and fostering addiction
Thank you for sharing this I have friends who were victims of revenge porn and had their bits plastered all over stupid websites. One girl I knew even had to change her name and drop out of college because of the harassment she was getting. She wasnt a famous streamer or anything, just a person from a small town I used to go to school with and she reached out to me years ago about it after why I asked she changed her name on social and made a new profile. It was disgusting. All because she left an abusive partner… he doxxed her college information too… and it hurt her career for a while. I tried to help her get the website shut down bc tons of innocent women and men were up there but this was years ago before there were the laws and protections we have today. I’m not sure if it’s still up, but she’s in a better place now. But god it was so horrible what happened to her and what continues to happen to people. Hell, look at all the nasty secret camera stuff that happens in places like South Korea, I’ve heard some sick stories there too of women who rip cameras out of screw holes or ceilings… The same bs happens to OF people too their nudes get abused and thrown around Reddit forums. People are just so gross and need to stop. I’m not super active in the twitch community but when I heard about the deepfake drama I was so pissed. How low can you sink? And then to accidentally stay live? There’s ethical ways you can enjoy porn and sex ffs 🤦🏻♀️
I wrote a paper on hosting liability for image-based sexual abuse (I on purpose avoid the term "revenge porn", as the phenomenon is neither porn nor a retaliation for a wrongdoing) in my university years. The number one issue about this phenomenon, the way I see it, is the lack of a clear social unity against it. The fact that so many people don't even know it as a crime and fail to consider this a moral failure on the party who commits the abuse is honestly shocking, and a real problem. People need to stop viewing it as an edgy flavor of porn and instead recognize it for the abusive and dangerous behavior that it is.
Revenge does not imply rightfull action. Technically the crusaders and the Muslims ended up getting revenge on eachother but at some point it was revenge for something that isn't wrongfull.
Hey man, I love you and I love how you address issues that we are currently facing and how you find a way to continue to throw yourself headfirst into the fire over in over in an attempt to help people. Your passion, compassion, and zeal for humanity is an inspiration. Keep doing what you're doing Dr.K.
It takes a special kind of moral bankruptcy to paint your friend's face on a porno without their consent. No matter what technology is used. It's like the AI version of finding some kind of weird sexual effigy of someone in someone else's closet and both individuals are actually close friends and the target is unaware of this. Truly freaky.
I'm really glad you talked about this Dr.K. I was super concerned when I first learned about this deep fake p*rn stuff and how dismissive people were of it, but it makes me feel a little better knowing that professionals are talking about the topic and breaking down how harmful it is to everyone.
This was a really intense video and I think the topic is deserving of such intensity. I myself saw a lot of people giving the "it's not that big a deal" response and I just wanted to grab them by the shoulders and shake them until they understand how seriously dangerous this stuff is. This video is essentially that. And to your point at the end about empathy and inceldom, thank you, thank you, thank you. This was such an important video to make.
Incels get rejected by women long before they have the opportunity to have an empathetic moment with a women. The incel problem has nothing to do with empathy.
@@kajjak7001 it’s a big deal because of consent. someone did not consent to this content being made and distributed. that alone should be enough. consent matters.
@@FriedChickenKyla You don't need to consent to being made into art. It's a category error. It literally can be made and you would be none the wiser, you could live your whole life and never know about it. It inherently does not cause harm to you. You have no right to demand people people making things using their own property (computer hardware) to ask for your permission first. Plenty of public figures (including but not limited to politicians) would LOVE for that to be the standard, to be rid of all the gross caricatures, torture images, porn art and photoshops, and so on. Freedom of expression cannot be curbed - Je Suis Charlie
I'd really appreciate an episode regarding this mentality of kids who have watched too much extreme porn and now believes certain things like "someone would leave me if i am small, I'll get cheated on, all girls are like that" etc (sexual trolling and harrassment victim kinda mentality.)
Damn, I've never seen Dr. K be so blatantly distressed, even angry about something. Deepfake porn is a line he is not happy to see crossed, and the compassionless responses seems to be a big danger sign to him.
How do you feel compassion for something you feel indifference for? When I heard about this drama I felt nothing. When I watched multiple streamers whine about, it felt nothing. After Dr. K made this video, I've rematch it a couple times and guess what? Nothing.
@@kajjak7001 Well, I guess it depends on why you feel nothing. If you are a psychopath (and im using that term here to mean someone who is unable to experience emotional empathy on an innate level, i.e. you were born without the capacity to have empathy as people commonly describe it as), then there's really nothing you can do about it. Empathy means to be able to put yourself in someone's shoes and see from their perspective, feeling the feelings they feel. How would you feel if other people could see "you" naked (and they genuinely believe it's you, even though you know otherwise), and have complete disregard for violating your own likeness? If your response to that is, "well I don't care if someone does that to me" (whether genuinely or because you can't really understand what it's like in that position because you've never experienced it before), then I don't know what else I can say. Should you feel compassion? Sure. But do you have to? No, especially if you have tried and just cannot. People generally have a propensity to be upset at injustices that occur. This is why people get angry when others get bullied, or wrongfully convicted, or etc. I suppose though that not everyone experiences that. But at the very least, don't add fuel to the fire. I saw a comment above that said, aptly, "I think if deepfakes make a person feel unpleasant then thats reason enough for me to have empathy. The victims are struggling and even if its legal to deepfake someone that still doesnt make it an alright thing to make" (@a stove). Even if you cannot relate or understand why they are struggling, the fact that the victims were dealt an injustice and are hurting because of that means that their "whines" are valid and should be given weight to. Even without compassion, you could still pity the victims that don't deserve to be put into this kind of humiliating situation.
@Kaj Jak If you really don't feel compassion, then I think you have two options: A) If you think that's a problem and you want to develop your capacity for compassion, then find someone to help you with this (therapist, coach, etc). B) If you don't think it's a problem and that's just how you are, then just steer clear of conversations like this. I'm not judging you at all, or saying that you're a bad person for reacting that way; rather that this may simply not be the right conversation for you to get involved with. I suspect you fall more into A than B, because you asked the question to begin with. But I'd be interested to hear your thoughts either way.
@@Hemlocker I don't have the resources necessary to buy professional help, so all I have is myself and introspection. After rewatching the video I find I feel nothing for the streamers or this deepfake "issure" they are having.
@@Hemlocker You are like the first person I've ever seen on a UA-cam comment that's actually rational and offers logical solutions. Major props to you kind stranger!
I've never heard someone capture this kind of subject like this, u really hit all the spots, without making one gender only victem or only evil. From my whole heart. Thank you.
Dr. K you’re spitting straight fire in this one. I’ve been noticing my own resentment not just for women but for all people to some degree lately and a big part of it is becoming more mentally healthy with medications, sobriety,and therapy, but this reinforces that even more for me. I think compassion isn’t always easy because sometimes it takes effort, but that’s the ideal I want or strive for. I hope this message reaches a lot of people because it’s the truth.
Top notch commentary on the situation. I’ve always tried treating people who appeared like assholes at first with compassion because I believe in the good human element of people, but I only ever do it to the point where I can’t get severely burned if they decide to take advantage of my compassion. The commentary in this video affirms to me that if everybody did this, the world would be a better place
Do your due diligence, but try not to over stress about the effects happening immediately. Sometimes the smallest interaction become fully realized way later in life
I am someone that before the drama, I didn't think deepfake porn was a big deal. What changed my mind were people talking to me with compassion. My original opinion wasn't out of malice, but rather out of ignorance. I didn't consider the possibility that deepfake porn could be sold as the real thing to defame people. TLDR: keep being you. It may seem pointless sometimes, but I guerrantee you've helped a lot of people.
Thank you for taking a firm stand on this, it's way too common seeing huge channels stear away from controversial or unpopular opinions for fear of the consequences, glad that didn't stop you.
“We’re screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who ‘doesn’t deserve it.’” Holy crap… this has me staggering… it’s… true… we have to be kind to all…
@@JB-mh5xy Okay, so let's take the 'group' out of it. Entirely on the PERSONAL level, just YOU and you alone. Do you want to be nicer to women? Do you want to be nicer to men?
@@JB-mh5xy if your incapable of giving compassion to those who don’t deserve it; don’t get bitter when people refuse to give compassion to you. This is what you wanted
@@JB-mh5xy It's sad that you brought up such a good point and all people could do was jeer and make weak overly insulting responses. Not a single one of them had an actual rebuttal to your argument, which says something.
@@JB-mh5xy Oh you're definitely preaching to the choir here. I agree with almost everything you said (apart from the parts that are personal to you; those are obviously your experiences and I can't really do more than sympathize). But I overall understand what you're saying and fully agree. I got into a pretty passionate argument with someone (and to be honest looking back I feel like I should have been a little more aggressive) during the fall of Roe v Wade. I said that it is absolutely ridiculous that women are coming out of the woodwork, entering mostly male spaces and demanding help from us to fix this problem of theirs. Not asking, DEMANDING as if we owe them this help and favor. All while conveniently forgetting the years of open and gleeful anti male rhetoric they flooded into the media and society as a whole. But suddenly now they want help. Absolutely ridiculous. I don't hate women, I don't hate any particular birth-group, but I think there is a very obvious parasitic relationship between men and women that everyone seems to go out of their way to avoid acknowledging. Men are supposed to be "good allies", we're supposed to put our physical and emotional labor, our careers, our friendships, and even our safety on the line in service to their deep cesspool of causes. Yet what do they give in return? Nothing. Not even the bare minimum of gratitude for such service. They sneer at the idea of even expressing thanks and insist they "shouldn't have to be nice to us to receive help, because it's the right thing to do". But the worst part of this is that men allow this maltreatment by refusing to stand up and demand better under the threat of withholding help. Too many will just rage at you if you even suggest it, or gaslight you into denying this dynamic exists at all, or give moral platitudes about how men "owe" women selfless sacrifice as reparations. Or you have someone like Dr. K who wants us all to hold hands and sing kumbaya...which, I'll admit is better than the other examples I gave, naive though it may be. Anyway I'm sorry for the angry rant. It's just that your words resonated deeply with me and seeing another person feeling a similar way brought it all up to the surface again.
@Oreo He made a very good point and all you can do is mock him, which is pretty typical of this kind of discourse. Like it or not, there is an unequal, almost parasitic relationship between men and women when it comes to this sort of thing. Men are expected to be "good allies" and help women with their causes, empathize with their problems, and break our own spines bending over backwards to see that they are accommodated. Yet the favor is so rarely returned. So many women seem to find even the idea of expressing gratitude towards men revolting. I can't tell you how many times I've heard "I shouldn't have to be nice to you for you to help me. You should just do the right thing". Or "Oooh you did the bare minimum, do you want a cookie?" There are countless others but all of them show a deep entitlement to men's help and a disdain for the idea of showing any reciprocation.
Everything you said is really true. I think mental health is the root of most issues. I have been feeling mentally well but I feel like keeping up with all these news stories and global events can really eat at my view of the world and fill it with negativity. I feel like humans weren't built to focus on so many issues, especially when they are already dealing with their own personal ones. It definitely leads to a helpless feeling when being involved and impacted by these huge issues, and I can't really say how to fix it. For me, deleting most social media (except twitch and youtube) has helped, but even as much as I mark political videos with "not interested" I always find myself impulsively clicking them and getting wrapped up in them so maybe the algorithm just won't stop. It's strange to finally feel some peace in my personal life only to then shift my focus to other issues. I need to limit how much I focus on the wrong and maybe give it a time and place for worrying about it because it'll always be there and I'd like to enjoy myself.
Same here, but I think what helped was getting a neutral view on the news. Mean to say accept them in the moment and act if something really can be done about it
Dr. K, I’m in awe of your content and this one in particular, from the title, the way you address such delicate topics and your use of common language to explain complicated stuff. I’m not a gamer myself but dated a couple guys who are, and I feel for them. People who struggle with addictions of any kind need our support and understanding. I wish I hd known better back then. However, it’s because of great channels like yours that I’m in a much better place now. I can’t thank you enough 🙌🏻
Somehow this actually proves what I've been saying for a while now. There's a total lack of empathy in people and we're fucked if it's not gonna change. Thank you for saying all this! It actually made me feel like I'm not the only one who sees it.
I imagine it's a bit like something I went through in high school. I came of age right as social media was invented. My first year of high school, a site called Formspring came out. The sole purpose of the site was to send anonymous questions to people. Your profile and answers were public. Being still completely innocent, I thought maybe people who had crushes on me would tell me through Formspring, cute things like that. With any new technology there are unforeseeable ways bad people can use it to hurt others. Well, on that site personal details of my dating history were made public and I was called a wh*re among other ugly names. Then the bullying spread to other sites and to my IRL social life. Probably not nearly as bad as people thinking you have a sextape, but I did contemplate suicide and was bullied badly enough I had to switch schools so I could make new friends. Cyberbullying really hurts!
Deep fake porn being made of women who have never made porn themselves is traumatizing also because women are, intentional or not, raised to constantly be aware of if they're performing to an invisible male gaze even in the privacy of our own home. And for someone to make deep fake porn is a violation of her privacy, and almost confirms that terrible feeling we've grown up.
What you said about the male gaze reminds me of this wonderful quote by Margaret Atwood: "Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it's all a male fantasy: that you're strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren't catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you're unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else. You are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur."
I went into watching this video with the mindset of "I'm going to learn a bit about a topic I'm not too familiar with" and by the end of the video I learned a lot about myself. I think I've developed a parasocial relationship with a lot of streamers, including you. But in a friendship sort of way and it has negatively impacted my life to a certain extent. I've also learned about a deep resentment and lack of empathy I have and that I need to seriously work on. Thank you so much for all you do for us.
Meh, I learned nothing but perhaps I've been round this carousel before. Basing your entire moral system on a single principle and viewing all problems as caused by this is hardly uncommon. Dr ks viewpoint of empathy (mostly directed towards women) with a dash of "get men to take responsibility" is pretty common in therapeutic circles. And it's easy cod compassion is nice. But while principles help no one principles solve all problems. It applies better here than other places
"I've seen parasocial relationships destroy marriges" - I genuinly went "whaaat, seriously?" after this. I never even thought it was possible for parasocial relationships to ruin a real life marriage. Excellent video, thank you for speaking about these topics honestly and openly, people dehumanize each other in different ways all the time these days, it seems like social media makes us see other people not as real human beings, but as some sort of 2-D characters. I don't engage with social media that much and even I sometimes notice this illusion of getting a good understanding of a person from, say, looking at their account. It's very shallow and kind of gross and that is only one of the reasons I avoid active social media use.
I like one of his final statements. Basically, saying we're screwed as humanity, unless someone is gonna be kind to someone who doesn't deserve it. So just in case you're reading this. It's okay to feel anything you're feeling. Your hurt is real, and you deserve help and support. Much love ❤
I've been following the recent drama pretty closely because I like the content creators involved. From what I've seen, very few people have been defending the site that hosted the deepfake porn, or defend the monetization/creation of AI porn in the likeness of real people in general. It seems pretty open/shut that its existence is gross. The main point of contention in the community has been whether or not the individual who accidentally leaked a deepfake porn tab on stream deserves to be cancelled for it.
@@bbouncy12 I have seen tons and tons of men on reddit saying it's totally fine. Said that the only issue was that he was dumb for not using a different laptop. They justified watching it and claimed they will continue to watch deepfakes and its the same as any other porn.
Thank you, as always, for using your time, energy, expertise, and heart to educate so many young humans out here on the internet. It's really important to see men like yourself model healthy ethical behavior and reach the kinds of audiences you do. It can be all too easy to act a fool online and do real harm. Cheers to you, Dr. K.
It’s honestly so hard to stay mindful of my gut reactions. Even if I do manage to notice that I’m feeling resentful or spiteful toward somebody, it’s such an uphill battle to turn that impulse off.
But you know that, and you're trying - that's what's important. I'm really proud that someone is working on themselves. It's so hard to believe that it's gonna get better sometimes, when you see all the hate pouring in. But then come people like you, honest about their struggle to change. And I feel like I'm not alone Thank you
It may seem trite, but don't "try to turn it off". It might sound "woo woo" but you can't change the problem with the thing that caused the problem (let's say "the mind" abstractly). I believe you will find more relief if you really try to accept the feeling-reaction from an unbiased conscious place. Labeling it can be effective, "I am feeling X". At the same time, consciously notice the other things going on, like tension or shallowness of breath, tight muscles, etc. Something strange happens when you don't resist and just observe. The "problem" just moves on like a cloud in the sky. Rinse and repeat, because those patterns don't just disappear in one go.
@@BASEDinMaine yeah I think that’s a much better approach, but I feel it is difficult in the very same way. It’s easy to recognize when you SHOULD be employing that tactic, but it’s a whole other thing to actually succeed in pulling it off. Thanks for the advice though. I’ll carry those words with me
@@willcooper8028 just want to share my idea on this. I also have struggles managing physical reactions caused by emotions, but I think I somewhat manage it better nowadays. Imo external stimulus is much harder to resist than internal in some cases. We dont have control over what the environment can throw at us, maybe some random jerk come at us when we are sad or angry and no one knows what kind of reflex we will do at that moment. But when its just ourselves, just like the other person said, we can observe, and simply do nothing for the time being and process the emotion. If I have to use bad analogy, it would be like trying to eat something bad (maybe tidepod lol). Some might feel the curiosity urge to try it, but for most that feel curious, all they have to do (to not do the bad thing, i.e. eat tidepod) is simply do nothing. Instead of external stimulus, like touching hot pan where we would react before we can think what to do. Both is a bad situation for us to be in, but technically speaking removing our hands from a hot pan shouldve been "harder" than doing nothing to not eat tidepod (esp if we are lazy people lol) So in a way its "not hard", because all we have to do is nothing. But yes its quite a hard thing to get around :)
25 minutes in of pure gold and suddenly Dr. K drops the "we are screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who doesn't deserve it". Literal goosebumps! Greatest video in a while
I like how you are empathetic to the perpetrators. I like how you are very straight forward with the damage that deep fake porn has on the people in the porn, like you just cut right through the bs and bring out the data and you are like "no this IS harmful". And I like how you appeal to people's better nature and encourage them to do better for themselves and for others.
Bois you gotta learn this!!! People treating you terribly can teach you the wrong lessons, and that's okay, but keeping the pain going and hurting others isn't. You can be there for someone where others weren't there for you and it will help you heal too.
I watch almost all of your videos and I think this is the most important yet. I try to practice compassion and forgiveness every day and I use a lot of the techniques and teachings you’ve mentioned to better my life. Its not perfect, but for the first time in years I’m happy. Genuinely happy.
Neither a dude nor a gamer.. I'm a 44 y/o married mom of two toddlers 🤷♀️.. I'm not even sure how I stumbled upon your content, but it had been highly relevant to my current life-experience & I thank you for sharing your unique voice & perspective 🙏🏻
“How could someone who’s not a victim of a deepfake understand the psychological impact of a deepfake is.” THIS!!! It’s like accepting an apology from someone when you’re not the one being apologized to. They can’t say that it’s fine because they’re not the ones who are hurt in this situation-and it’s so, so frustrating when they insist that that their opinion holds as much, if not more, value as the real victim.
@@friendguy13 Don’t give me that, man. That can be applied in certain situations, but not this one. Especially not this one. These degenerate perverts are saying there’s nothing wrong with all this shit, but they aren’t the ones having their lives ruined over deepfakes that they didn’t make or consent to being shared on THE INTERNET. The fucking audacity 💀💀💀
@@friendguy13 Abstract thought is a gift, but it's not a substitute for actual experience. Imagination is supposed to promote empathy, trying to put ourselves in someone's shoes and trying to imagine how they would be feeling, asking them if this is how they feel, and that we understand and see their pain. It's supposed to help us look past the end of our noses, not to tell people that their experience doesn't match our thought process.
Jesus Christ, the last part of this video is a grim premonition that's being more real day-by-day. The deepfake situation in itself is very horrible but like you said, what's more horrible is that this event is one big part of the main issue happening right now in regards to online discourse where compassion and understanding between various genders (M, F, LGBTQIA+, etc.) keeps getting divided. Psychological manipulation through dopamine addiction, the tendency for social media to elevate the most disturbing/depraved opinions under the guise of "conversation" (internet traffic yay...?), the rising movement of self-help gurus that motivate men towards psychological manipulation with such a disconnect for understanding +compassion, feminism discussions that end up being "all men bad" and I can't blame em for that, but it's also another side in the ouroboros cycle of sociological downfall which feeds in more to the "manosphere" rhetoric since other men that weren't part of that sphere to begin with end up in them eventually because their feelings get dismissed due to negative perception towards being male. Not only is this a main problem between M vs F discourse, it’s happening in LGBTQIA+ communities as well with the toxicity of queer discourse online coinciding alongside political fuckery that puts this community in the same bucket as pedophiles for the most homophobic, transphobic, etc. reasons you can think of. Everyone’s mental struggles are valid but I also just wish that people would be more willing to look past damning generalizations of a huge gender chunk of the human population, no matter how small that chunk is, and actually help people get out of these psychological rabbit holes, lest we end up with more new gender categories for mass shooting challenge runs /s. TL;DR: thank the cosmos I don’t engage with online discourse that much since my autistic ass is just quietly lurking and watching these horrible trends play out and happen like one horrible cinematic experience.
Just commenting to Thank you Dr. K. It’s really important to have role models like you talking about these issues and the matter of consent in general. As a victim of SA I’m really tuched by this topic and I hope this video reaches many people.
I’ve never seen this channel before- but thank you for addressing this topic. You are really strong toned and defensive for the victims. I think that’s really important here because I am sure there is a sense of being powerless to victims.
Thank you - I've always been surprised at the community and how men don't treat women like human beings in some cases. Within moments of encountering them. We needed this message of compassion.
Excellent timing as always. I think a lot of people today are obsessed with getting revenge on each other and putting others in their place, and doing so under the guise of a righteous (or at least harmless) motivation. Hurt people hurting people is unfortunately a very real phenomenon.
thank you for talking about this. this is the reason i ended my 10 year relationship. he was disgustingly self serving with his consumption of women online, and i stupidly stood by and was told "this is what guys do, youre so jealous and sensitive." naw buddy. youre a control freak that doesn't treat humans like humans.
All of Dr K’s content is great, but this video is absolutely top tier - I feel like it’s the most meaningful and important video I’ve seen on UA-cam, period.
I feel like the people who say "its not your body" don''t understand that its still a violation and even fi it'snot to the same extent as other forms of violation, it has a very real impact. Also another issue is that our default response as a society is "you shouldn't feel that way" instead of "what makes you feel that way".
Dr.K's analogy of having your reputation smeared was the perfect way to describe it to jaded men. Men as a whole generally value being respected by others to a high degree.
You know it's serious when Dr. K feels it's important to address the topic instead of ignoring the drama
Im sorry, but what happened?
@@lunamartinezzz Streamer Atrioc accidentally showed his tabs on stream, and one of them was deepfake porn of his streamer colleagues, well basically his friends.
@@adamcummings20 thats horrible!! Thank you for the info
@@lunamartinezzzthey deleted their comment, what did they say?
@@piyushsharma3991 I didn't get to read it either, but i assume they delete it because they don't want to encourage this behaviour and let us follow down this curiosity and search for that stuff.
As a male victim of revenge porn , I completely understand the feeling. I was in high school and became extremely depressed. I feel so bad for these women as I had tons of support I can’t imagine what it would be like to have people tell you , you shouldn’t be upset . It’s disgusting and disheartening
There’s a huge gap between revenge porn and deepfaking. Revenge form has to do with a sexual act being non-consensually filmed and distributed without consent or monetary compensation. Deepfake porn has 0 interaction between the Internet personality and the act. It uses their likeness, but as long as it’s known that it’s not really them, it shouldn’t be considered wrong. Maybe it hurts that the streamers in question are offended, but it comes with the territory.
@@marcalva6316 Dude shut up
@@marcalva6316 Well you just summed the whole issue of deepfakes which is that for many it is not known that it's not the person and that is the aim there. It is wrong no matter what. And it absolutely shouldn't come with the territory and it's not a justification
nobody is telling them "you shouldn’t be upset", most of the critism on qt's reaction is being overly upset like she was r*p*d or assaulted, like the statement "this is what pain looks like", there levels to everything and the deepfake stuff does not match with her reaction, it wouldve been way more understandable if it was revenge porn with her actual body doing sexual things
@@marcalva6316 If this is some kind of joke, it must be in poor taste because:
1) 2:12 literally explains the study results that prove the damage to the streamers is more than just "feeling offended" (over 50% of victims have suicidal ideations)
2) 13:48 recontextualizes deepfake porn as "another box checked in a parasocial relationship" (which damages the consumers of deepfake porn by disconnecting/further distancing them from non-parasocial relationships).
PSA: Harmful jokes on a serious subject aren't funny.
If you genuinely didn't watch the video before commenting, I left relevant timestamps.
Male victim of SA here. Learning the shame and hurt and fear and loathing I experienced after being assaulted weren't pains unique to my experiemce galvanized my ability to empathize. I came from a pretty messed up home (score super high on adverse childhood experiences, for those in the know), and i still struggle in a lot of ways, but there is something liberating in being able to affirm to someone else that the shit they're dealing with is an indignity, that they can hurt and shouldn't be ashamed by that hurt. Not in a "let me be your white knight" kinda way, but being able to turn my self awareness outward to be present with someone else and use it to grok a more nuanced picture of that other human being's external and internal life.
I hope you find the healing you deserve, if not today, then one day.
I second what Sam Fowler said! If anything coming from a nobody like myself, I appreciate your comment. ^_^
Hope whoever abused you suffers from something painful and never-ending. Godspeed with your recovery.
I hope you find peace and contentment in spite of all the suffering you have endured, no-one deserves to be at the hands of such cruelty
I can really tell you’ve processed this in a very constructive way in order for you to heal and deal with the hurt and pain. I am a female victim of SA who has been in therapy since I was 10, I turn 21 this year. I cant believe Ive been in therapy half my life, but it’s gotten me here. I can see something really familiar in your words, that I’ve worked through myself as well. Thank you for sharing your experience and journey.
"No snowflake thinks it's responsible for the avalanche". Another masterpiece of a video Dr. K, you speak nothing but the truth here.
big brain doctor speak good 💕
true, a lot of snowflakes out there nowadays 😂
@@someuser17 we always been there, melting
That honestly sounds like a horrible quote to me. I can see some people using it to justify bigotry.
@@Aubreykun I can totally see it being spun out of context by people on the right, but I still appreciate the point he was trying to get at
I feel like the extreme lack of empathy on the internet has been steadily getting worse and now it is leaking out into real life and it's honestly terrifying. Thank you for speaking out on this topic. I feel like you really hit the nail on the head with this.
Nah, it’s been like this for the longest time. Where do you think school shooters get radicalised and all these Nazi “Alt right” groups come from?
Its hard to empathize when someone has no been directly physically affected. Artist use real people as reference for their art and suddenly someone can claim to be injured by another persons work. This guy is equating to being unconsciously raped to ones who have seen physical imitations of themselves. His argument is, "studies have shown what it can do to the human mind", well there a lot of stuff that can do to the human mind, like for example getting enraged over Hogwarts and screaming because Trump won.
Empathy is like water. You need a little, but too much will kill you.
“If you’re a man who feels judged by a woman who won’t give him a chance, think about what must have happened in that woman’s life…Men are becoming better and better at deception…”
Dr. K, this is the first time I’ve ever heard a man formulate this in this way, with empathy. I appreciate you, your clarity, and your dedication to getting others in touch with their own humanity.
Men this, women that. People are individuals. Enough generalizing
@@dend1 yep exactly, ppl are always just focusing on the WRONG stuff, only makes theirs' and others' lives much worse, and social media just 100 timed it man i hate the internet cuz of this, BUT if not for me being on yt, i would have never come across dr k and other knowledgeable content, im grateful but man... this is just sad
"we are screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who doesn't deserve it" 25:38
been living by this for the last couple years it has saved me from much hurt. So glad someone finally said it.
amazing video
I often think about this too, the chain of resentment and abuse can only be broken by kindness, even when you dont think they deserve it (and sometimes they truly do)
Yeah. It’s how I try to operate! I think it serves me well. ✌🏼♥️🙏🏼
This is how I've always done in life and despite thinking it was a good thing to do, there were times where it feels like I'm siding with the opponent I'm being nice to, which may feel like I'm betraying the people I'm actually siding with. This deterred me into not doing it as much. But after this guy told me that this is a real necessity that could do waves... wow, it just really motivates me into doing it more and more.
Not, of course, to side with the "opponent", but to treat them as much care as I did to the victims, because from what I've learned so far (and was emphasized from this video), is that they are also victims themselves. Make them place their fingers on the heart where all that resentment and hurt is coming from. Shit like this just makes me want to work myself to become more helpful and kinder to others.
@@santoriomaker69 exactly! 💖
@@Phoenix.Sparkles Does the child abuser deserve that kindness you offer? What about the Serial killers and R*pists? Do they deserve your kindness too?
Thank you for sharing this message. I met a girl who was a victim. They weren't even adult content pictures, just beach photos. But them put on a revenge porn forum and finding out sent her spiraling for years. She gained 80lbs just so Noone could possibly recognize her from those photos.
Hopefully laws around this become much more strict around this.
@@FreneticFolklore You're dumb. Once those pics were on the internet countless people would recognize her.
@@FreneticFolklore somebody didn't watch the video
@@FreneticFolklore well... our brains aren't wired for forums and social media and sometimes people don't know how things will make them react :(
----and how do you know she'll never meet these people irl? It was most likely put up by someone she knows irl. She might now have a crippling paranoia that anyone she meets has seen these pictures and whatever nasty story went with them. The perpetrator might have SEO optimized that shit so it comes up in a background check :(
How did it get back to her?
There's a good chance that the perpetrator made sure it stung, putting the "revenge" in revenge porn
"first world problems"... many people from impoverished developing nations are horrified by what they describe as "spiritual hostility" in first world nations
I’m so sorry that happened to her-similar thing happened to my friend but they were some nudes the dude doxxed her college info too and it ruined her career for a while and she also had to change her name cuz people were stalking and harassing her online.
@The Midnight Library that's exactly the callous response the video was telling you to self reflect on. And you will probably never be in that situation. And it's not 5 people. That photo probably was copied and circulated in other places too. And at 18 years old your you are still kind of a child
My GF brought this deep fake drama up a few days ago. I had to say I was shocked of the responses some were giving. I’m not even that much of an emotional dude and even I had to question how do these people lack the empathy to realize why a victim of deep fake porn would feel devastated. I fear for the newer generation tbh
@@Egocentrism245 Idk where you’re coming from with this “ez difficulty” crap, but all I’m saying is it doesn’t take much brain power to figure out why someone would be devastated to find out someone used their image for deep fake porn. The persons status is irrelevant - it’s called basic human decency. Just imagine if it was your mom, sister, or another loved ones image used against their will for porn. It’s fundamentally wrong.
@@Egocentrism245 You’re making a lot of assumptions there buddy. Having a GF doesn’t mean she is thinking for me - I was presented with the situation and responded accordingly. Calling someone “sheep blue pill” for having a conscious just shows you need to get off the internet and touch grass.
I guess porn is so normalized these days that’s why some of them lack empathy
@@Egocentrism245 dude, seek help
Young men are getting desensitized by porn and by the manosphere influencers. They don't see women as people. It's really scary.
Ex-cam model here. There are a lot of serious considerations you make when deciding to take part in adult media. Will family find out? Will future partners find out? Will future employers find out? Am I emotionally ready and willing to broadcast myself in this way? Am I at too much a risk of picking up a stalker? The only reason that my camming experience was anything more than traumatizing was because my answer to all those questions was "I'm cool with it." And coming to that place of being "cool with it" didn't just come from nowhere, either. It took months of careful consideration, of emotional processing and preparation. I can't imagine being in a situation where that kind of material is made about me without my consent. That sounds hellish. Consent is everything, especially with matters involving sex.
Thank you for this perspective!
@@ezaf5989 you realise that your comments are bullying, right? I don't know what you get from this, but consider if you really want to be that person in the discussion.
@@ezaf5989 what is wrong with you? Why do you feel the need to be vile to another human being for no reason?
@@ezaf5989 hey, thanks for litterally provide an example of that exact problem mentioned in the video
@@dande-lion its fucking maddening, I see this shit everywhere. Basically every Instagram post featuring a woman sharing her story/opinion/perspective is filled with intolerant, misogynistic crap like his comment. I think Dr. K hit the nail on the goddamn head here, we are suffering a crisis, and the indoctrination of male youth by red-pill manosphere types is just adding fuel to an already existing and growing bushfire
I've been unnerved by deepfake technology ever since it was just an idea.
often people are too easily scared by new technologies... deepfake is a different case. Deepfake was always a bad idea, both on paper and in real life. The memes are not worth it.
yeah me too
The problem is that the general public doesn't take things seriously until it's actually here. Whether it's privacy, or AI, or even growing political movements... it's always "oh that will never happen!" until it actually does, despite any amount of evidence you show them.
Same I don’t understand the point of it. It’s not solving or fixing anything just creating more false information and fear.
@@cleverman383that’s another problem. We’ve essentially taught these machines ourselves over the past decade using the internet…
I’m a woman with ASD level 1 and have CPTSD. I do NOT treat people like that. People need to take responsibility and be kind despite what happened to them. Women are people, too. We are bullied constantly, go through the same stuff. I am tired of people telling women they have no stress. The comment about the person hearing lots of people hearing bullies bully them happens to me on a weekly basis. But I don’t do revenge porn or any any revenge. No one is there for me now. I am resentful. But I remember that pain and don’t want to inflict it on others. So I don’t accept that as an excuse. I say they need to grow up and improve themselves. I did a lot of improvement on myself to make people interested. Now I don’t believe people when they compliment me. It’s shocking to me. But it does prove that people can like you if you are at your best.
Misogyny hurts everyone in some way. Just like racism. It’s makes society suck.
I'm a man who has level 1 ASD, and I agree. One of the most frustrating things is when people try using their disabilities or experiences to absolve judgment.
Having been falsely accused by a girl in my previous university of stalking her isn't something that I would take revenge for even after being told I could file a claim against her. I wouldn't hold any other woman accountable for this either, although I'd be lying if I said it's had no impact on my interactions with women.
I'm sorry that you have no one, I know first-hand how hard it can be to deal with stressful situations, but have no one to turn to. I hope things get better for you.
Thank you, precisely why many me are fed up. Women have been infantilized by society and are not held to the same standards as men are being held to. So of course it creates resentment from men. And that's not even to say women don't have their own issues that they have to deal because they do. But excusing bad behavior just because bad behavior was done to them isn't how to address it.
Hey, this comment really spoke to me for a few reasons not relating directly to me but to a relationship I had with a person in a similar situation to what you've described. Would you mind answering some questions?
As to what you said in the second part: I'm really sorry you don't have anyone there for you right now. And I also understand you don't believe people when they compliment you in any way, you think they're lying to you I am assuming? But, again having been in a relationship for a short while with someone in a very similar position to you, I can tell you that most of those compliments are true. I really get that it's a shock that anyone could think of you in a positive way, because you've experienced different for so long (I'm assuming?), but honestly that just proves how incredibly far you have come on your journey to healing. My relationship ended by the fact that this person was not yet ready to let go of the vengeful thoughts, anger and pure fury they felt for those who harmed them and as a result was closed off to my own feelings in the relationship because 'I've been mistreated so long that it's unfair that I still have to apologise or feel sorry [for things that I've done/have happened to others].'. And I get it, I truly do. But that's not something I am able to deal with in a relationship. I digress; To hear you say that you are resentful but you have worked on yourself to still have the ability to show empathy for others, is truly a HUGE accomplishment. Be proud of yourself for that! You probably still have a long ways to go, but hey. You're strong and you've come this far! And I'll tell you again, I know it's difficult to accept compliments, but they are usually true.
I also have CPTSD. I don't do things like that either. But I do struggle with resentment and hypervigilance and feeling extreme anger and fear when I get triggered/reminded of the past. I do feel a lot of empathy for people but if I'm intimidated/afraid it's like a wall comes up and I become hostile
I hope it gets better with time
I am still healing from fresh wounds
I can't afford therapy
Finally a sane take in this community, it’s honestly depressing that the only male streamers that have reliably made empathetic takes are Dr. K, Ludwig, and Charlie.
I don't think disagreeing that it *should* be so upsetting is an inherently unempathetic take, I understand why someone *might* be upset about something like this I just don't think it's reasonable- which is totally fine btw people are unreasonable sometimes it comes with the territory
I found xQc to be good as well. He fought back well against the creeps in his chat.
He didn't say anything of value. Do you really think that telling people on the internet "Hey, don't exploit these hot pictures of said person because she doesn't consent", that it will work ? You're out of your mind of you think that. Especially when you're talking about stuff which are accessible in 2 seconds. OFCOURSE people will exploit them. This is the real world. Bad People are out there.
I would really appreciate it if he said something like " Do not post your picture in the internet ESPECIALLY children" AT ALL. That would be a good advice because this is a reasonable precautions you can take.
If you preach to the fire how burning is bad and barbaric all day, fire will always burn. Instead, take precautions from the fire.
@@theoathman8188 To say empathy has no value is absolutely insane. Dr. K has experience with this particular moral bankruptcy. That is like half his channel. However the purpose of sharing the emotional impact is to educate the unaffected about the effects of their indulgence. Obviously most people who ENDORSE it will not shift their worldview in the face of empathy. This is different for the ignorant. Dr K's empathy has potential to allow those addicted to potential non consensual sw into perspective. It is Pokimane's passion and job to stream. People will inevitably find her attractive. This obviously doesn't mean she should quit her job. Most deepfakes are of people already in non sw industries. What the empathy and perspective does however, is to project the consequences and emotions of nonconseual videos upon those who are addicted to it, as those who indulge in the videos likely do not consider it as such. Its not for the producers. We all know they're long gone. Moreover, public outcry over such videos has actually caused uproar in legal considerations before. It is vital we spread this message so that women do not have to rely on flimsy copyright law to protect their faces from being plastered in sexual videos. It was just as vital to prevent revenge porn and fight back on that too in western countries. It is important as people, for lawmakers to hear it from victims, and to hear the effects and research.
@@monimon9460 You put it SO excellently. Thank you for that.
18:59 - 20:20 is so very profound. It's almost a disservice to have it so deep in the video. This needs to get clipped and shipped across the internet. So very powerful. This is succinct enough I think to try and convince people who do not feel the privilege that is prescribed to them to understand their actions.
Agreed; that segment definitely needs to be published as a YT short and/or TikTok
it needs to be clipped onto tiktok. Best way to get things like this out there to bigger audiences that need to hear it.
He's brilliant
Alternatively, it's not resentment from personal experience, it's the knowledge and realization that it really isn't a big deal. It's fake, who cares.
@@1OMEGA111 ironically, you ARE the one who needs this clip THE MOST
I’m probably much older than your average viewer and my gaming habits haven’t been disruptive to my life, but I appreciate the thoughtful, direct, no nonsense way you’re talking about the value of empathy and compassion.
How did you do that? Are you able to tip money to helpful UA-camrs?
@@RoseKnowss if you go to the bar under the video with like and share and scroll it to the left, you'll see a thanks button for donations (on mobile anyway, probably in the same place on desktop).
I'm almost 35 and I watch your content because it's one of the only positive places online for such an audience. Although I don't struggle with most topics, I am a recovering heroin addict who was homeless the last few years of my addiction but finally, after almost two decades on heroin, I got sober. I get bummed out with the state of youth on the internet (and adults lol) but your content gives me some much needed hope. People can make a positive change, I know. I just celebrated 2.5 years off heroin Jan 31st. Keep making positive content Dr. K!! We all need it.
@MisterBricks well done on working on your addiction and being sober for so long. Hope you enjoy your stay 😁
Thanks for sharing and congrats!
That is a Massive win for you man, congratulations on a huge life accomplishment!
I've never had any business with drugs, but I think Im also an addict
Just addicted to a different thing - the internet and technology.
So... Yeah, that sounds impressive to me, thanks for sharingn
Wow bro stay up. Some things in life shouldn’t feel too good. Balance is important and H has none in fact it’s only chaos. So good job man
I am so glad you brought up the cycle where men *are* having a harder time connecting and finding partners but ALSO seeing the fact that women’s distrust is necessary for their safety - a viciouscycle of loneliness and pain on both parts. But yes, blaming women is not the point or the way out.
@@IsomerSoma I fail to understand if this is meant to be a response to what I said or not
@@bready2crumble Seems like i have missclicked on your comment. I'll delete it.
It's a garbage argument.
The issue is often more social isolation and not being experienced interacting with others boundaries..e.g. respecting and probing for consent. Also women are just on average more afraid and the fear can be based on social media rather than reality.
I suspect a more real issue online dating thar makes respecting boundaries less real and less worthwhile.
@@tomwright9904 no I barely go outside I’m just like that lol and the few times I have with friends I’ve still had way to many encounters w genuinely creepy men as an underaged girl you say social media as if the things there aren’t reflective of real life the amount of harassment I’ve heard from my friends and people even younger than me around me even if they are innocent and don’t try to do anything out of their age range and look their age is terrifying women being on average more afraid just makes no sense? You say that like it’s a fact that is not connected to the things we go through we’re on average more afraid because we’re on average the victims of uncomfortable situations and sexual harassment
@@tomwright9904 Oh trust me our fear has been around long before social media. Men know too what some men are capable of, or why else are dads extra protective of their daughters? Why are brothers always looking out for their sisters?
Unfortunately most of us girls are raised from the start to be wary of strangers, how to look out for dangerous situations, creeps etc. And thank god for those kind of lectures, because even as a young girl I’ve only narrowly avoided certain situations and shady people. Imagine getting catcalled while you’re underage and walking in your school uniform. Getting stared at or touched. For alot of young girls this is a reality and therefore a fear they also take with them into adulthood, since it doesn’t stop there
I believe that spreading non-consensual deepfake porn should be a sue-able offense like defamation and libel.
Someone has to take that step to put this before a court of law. We did it with revenge porn and I think deepfake porn has standing for that reason.
I think deepfake porn should just be straight up illegal tbh. As Dr K said it nt only damages the person being deepfaked but the person watching it. Its exactly like smoking. Capitalism has found another way to make money out of suffering.
@@albal156 I think that banning deepfake porn from being made entirely would be extremely difficult to enforce. But if there’s a practical way to do that then yes it should be illegal.
@@brimstoner982 yeah getting it banned from being made would be incredibly hard. Getting it banned from being seen is slightly (and only slightly) less difficult. We could try a law that any porn site where viewers upload videos must immediately remove and report any individual that uploads a deepfake. So let's say hypothetically that actually works, we now have excellent monitoring on porn sites, videos are flagged and removed.
The next issue is deepfakers making their own websites to upload to. How do we stop that? Okay, we could try a law that any paid/free hosts must monitor video content uploaded to their servers (which is a lot to ask of them), however that doesn't stop someone from running their own private server from their home. All you need is server software on a hard drive you don't mind running 24/7.
*Maybe* restricting access to the point where they have to host their own content could drive enough deepfakers to not want to bother. But it's not a absolute solution.
If individuals could report websites to whatever internet provider they're under that might help. Then again as soon as you involve VPNs that get's way harder to do.
I’d prefer it be a criminal offense. You know, actually update our laws to address the tech landscape we currently live in.
I really hope this video receives more recognition and views because the rise in this a.i is being used for evil intent it's heartbreaking.
I know that AI is being used for so many other things but all I really am aware of is its use in making the human experience worse
As someone who is currently a bit of a loner, AI has personally elevated my life significantly in hobby, career, and creative pursuits.
I have yet to see any of the negatives of AI.
@@cheetman1 are you aware of how ai is being used in visual arts
@@ratchetandchank8648 it's because AI is expensive to develop, so all the companies that have the resources to make it are asking the question "Can I use it to reduce my overhead?" ie people.
@@cheetman1 I’m glad it’s helped you improve your life, but just because it’s helped you doesn’t mean it hasn’t had deeply negative effects on other people’s lives. There are multiple prominent artists whose entire portfolios have been fed as raw data to generators like stable diffusion and midjourney, either without permission or expressly against their wishes.
What a great video!
At the start of the pandemic, I was a guy full of hate, rage, envy, sadness, and loneliness through others and myself. Today I can say I learned to love and to have patience with myself. Healthygamer had a significant influence on me to make that happen. Let's don't give up hope. I think we all can get better :)
I'm genuinely thankful for this community, the healthyGamer's staff and coaches, Kruti and, obviously, for Dr.k.
Yeah I'm currently there rn. I have no idea how to get out and I'm also a teenager so legit everybody just says it's puberty and no one cares. Let's hope that changes one day.
I'm really happy to hear about your growth. I'm proud of you man
@@itsLantik it will!
I can recommend the teachings of stoicism of Marc Aurelius and Taoism, those helped a lot in gaining a new perspective
Happy to hear!
❤❤❤
I once had someone impersonate me on Discord with the same username (just a different tag number) and the same profile picture, spamming people with insults in dms and whatever as a sort of revenge for ignoring the impersonator's advances. That alone made me rage, frustrated, pissed and annoyed so much that it's hardly believable even though everyone involved knew after a few moments that it wasn't me. Deepfake or revenge porn is probably a lot worse. It's hard to imagine how much it affects you until you've been in such a situation.
would you have been mad if you and everyone else knew beforehand that someone was going to impersonate you?
@@mysticflow467 You'd always be mad about it even if you know it's going to happen eventually. You might have less of an initial shock if you're prepared for it, but you'd still be very agitated and frustrated. There's just a profound feeling of rage and powerlessness if someone impersonates you and you cannot do anything about it. And it's not like some small comedy sketch either and neither is deepfake.
We don't have to imagine, deepfakes are in essence edited videos that existed for decades it is just easier nowadays than it used to be 5 years ago through machine learning algos and way way easier than 10 years ago.
Edited faces of celebrities on pornography was easily accessible for years now but no one batted an eye now all of a sudden it's something extremely disgusting that we should do something right now !!!!
I don't say that it's not a problem but the sudden realization that this thing exists is hypocritical, people used it as a way to get clicks on their videos and news sites.
@@silotx that’s because more people are aware of these things now. personally i knew the existence of deepfakes but i thought we had strict laws that put the victims of such videos in an advantage if they decide to sue. but nevertheless its great that people are speaking up about how this is immoral. just because they didn’t do it sooner that doesnt mean they should not do it at all your logic makes 0 sense
There was a big case in France where a woman job-hunted for a few years until she found out the reason no one was hiring her was a small ring of resentful people who created fake social media profiles, impersonated her and spread misinformation. It took months for state-mandated experts to take off most of the stuff. I can't even imagine how it felt when she learned the truth, even though I hope it was partially relief at the reason not being worst luck ever plus her resume being fundamentally broken.
This is such an important video!! I had a friend who responded with ambivalence regarding the most recent Deepfake situation. He took the stance of, "It's better and less damaging then sexually harrassing people irl" and "People legally have a right to do what they want in their spare time."
He then asked me why I was so disgusted with the whole concept of Deepfake, and I admittedly did not have a great counterarguement beyond, "Neither of us know for sure it's not damaging to people involved... and in general it just feels REALLY, REALLY, wrong to make porn of people without their consent. Like there's no way it can feel this wrong and be OK."
You did an amazing job presenting what those feelings were trying to communicate in a logical, constructive, and empathetic way. I'll be sharing this with my friends, when appropriate, to continue the conversation. Thank you for everything you do!
Another good counter argument, “What if the deepfake wasn’t an adult?”
@@killertruth186 Good point! While not 1-1, I feel this this discourse is somewhat reminiscent of the debate regarding whether or not it is appropriate to show fictional minors in compromising situations.
Defenders of both seem hung up on the idea that it should not be able to do harm because it isn't "real." Moreover, not only is it not a problem, but a potential safeguard to preventing "real" tragedies from occurring.
I'm not expert on either, but from what little I know, I think science is saying otherwise.
your friend sounds like a psychopath to be honest. I would personally not try to debate morals and just steer clear of him.
@@killertruth186 oh god that one didn't even cross my mind. I can sadly already imagine disgusting people saying stuff like "but it's not a real minor, that means it's not actually real cp" or some other abhorrent shit, just like they already do with lolis🤢🤢
@@plasmodius9449 lol1 drawings are not real but deepfakes requiere to be trained on REAL people, not on the same level at all.
Don't know if this makes sense to anyone else, but the way I imagine someone who finds deepfake porn of themselves would feel is kind of a worse version of how it feels if someone tells everyone you know that you said or did something really bad or embarassing that you never actually did. Like if a bully befriends all of your friends and then tells them shit about you that is not true, but now everyone believes it. But even worse than that.
Like the digital (edit:visual) version of malicious gossip. I've always ignored gossip and have been lucky enough not to be drastically affected by it, but the deepfake stuff is on another level. If we all just ignored it, it would lose all it's power, which is how I've always felt about verbal gossip too, but it's hard to get the whole world on board with that
This exact situation happened to me in High School. A dude told everyone I gave him a bl*w job in the park next to the school and everyone believed it. The girlfriend of said dude was one of my best friends at the time and she never spoke to me again. I felt so helpless, depressed and defeated that no one believed me and the other dude just got away with ruining so many of my friendships (and potentially even future relationships because so many heard the rumor) simply because he wanted to use me as a means of winning brownie points with his buddies. He NEVER apologized. He never felt an ounce of regret or remorse. If anything he got some weird satisfaction out of ruining my freshman year.
I was thinking about that and then I read your comment. The level of unearned shame, I'd lose my fucking mind.
The only issue is that the majority of people are aware that they're fake. The websites usually have the word deepfake on them, like the guy who just quit because of this (mrdeepfakes)
@@Ash1eonYT im so sorry that happened to you
As someone who had my pictures obtained in a wrongful way and my personal photos were shared without my consent to HUNDREDS. THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS
A friend of mine had that happen to her. She moved to a different school. I felt so bad for her
I have had the opposite experience. I was accused of SA and it took a very long time and a whole lot of money to prove that i was literally on the other side of the country when she said it happened. It took even longer to get the accusation off my record. If she had used a deepfake as evidence, that process would have been 10x worse for me. And no, she faced no repercussions for the false accusation.
Damn gg
Get your 1's in with em. Hopefully legal system can work in like a class action lawsuit or defimation lawsuit against spreaders of known nonconsensuial(idk long ass word) pornography will be reigned in on a national level forcing a precedence in legislation
Someone made porn with my 7th grade school photos. With Photoshop, back in the day. A family member did this, and every one else told me to forgive him because "he hadn't actually touched you". I don't date and I'll probably never have children. Realizing there is something so wrong with me that my parent wanted to ... I feel broken by this. This is an awful thing to do people.
You've changed my mind about this, me personally I've never been interested in consuming deepfake porn or really porn in general as of lately. But my attitude toward this was more like the relationship between a drug dealer and the consumer. I can't blame/be shocked that the consumer is taking in this stuff, so unless these sites are gone I had a lack of empathy where I thought people should know that this would happen. But after watching this video I've learned that I should be more emotionally understanding to other people put in that position.
I know im just a random stranger, but i think its really great that you took the time to think about your opinions and reconsider them. ♥
I mean , on one hand you're not wrong. It's just not ground for apathy.
@@LadyMorrigan I think people like us who is a part of Dr K's community seem to be generally open minded people. You want to avoid following a single narrative especially in this day and age imo.
Thanks for the kind words though!
@@TripnotizeVM I agree completely. I think people should really always be willing to consider other opinions and positions, even if they at first seem wrong to you.
Have a great day!
Same to me as well. I'm just 16y.o. boy and all my life I have zero empathy until I saw something that didn't bother me but my rational brain thought shouldn't I be empathetic to this thing then I just started questioning my emotions and why I feel none. That moment I feel like my hidden/buried emotions started to show I suddenly feel emotional yet can't cry like something is hiding my emotions and just trying to stop me from crying. I still try to be empathetic and gain emotions because that's what makes us human but it's hard when your taught to not have emotions.
I've seen men devalue women when a tragic thing happens to them.
I've also seen women telling men that they are not being "a man" in situations.
The lack of compassion scares me.
This is the reason why people don't share their emotions to anyone anymore.
It's worse when we realize it's all around us. It's almost unavoidable... Another comment said that unnecessary kindness is the only hope to stop unnecessary hate.
@@itsLantik I'm stuck with indifference so best of luck in that working
It feels like we separated into tribes, and one side started attacking the other.
Then the other tribe retaliated, and we're stuck in escalation and petty arguments and distractions.
One small minority showed complete lack of compassion. And now it's escalated to the point where we're all screwed.
@@oshawott4544 Yeah the only hope is just trying to escape it all, because the problem is so big that some good Samaritan isn't gonna magically fix it. I don't understand why we live in a world like this.
@E The black and white thinking is unfortunately our programming from a young age now. It's getting worse with the advent of gender and race education, people obsessed with combating hate with more hate.
Fucking thank you! I have been screaming this my entire recent life. This is a spiral effect that will never stop unless we do something about it. And the AMOUNT OF TIMES I'VE BEEN TOLD "It's not your job" or "This is unhealthy, people shouldn't do this" or my favorite "You're just a simp" when I do it for EVERYONE! It's not only a disregard for compassion now a days, people are actively trying to discourage it, belittle those who reach out, and make them believe they're actually hurting people by trying to help. It sickens me any time I have to hear this. And just... thank you. Thank you for using your platform to talk about this.
It's all about breaking the cycle of hate. The best thing you can do is be the best human you can be and hope your empathy rubs off on others because we've all been hurt/are hurting. We live in a society that stigmatizes compassion for others. Calling others a simp or a pick-me girl for being empathetic to the plight of the opposite gender.
Compassion has little to negative value now. Its because of fearmongering, we all feel so exposed and afraid all the time, everything seems like an attack on the self, and hence if i try to show compassion to the "other side", I am betraying my side, I am a traitor to my side and a spy to the other, I am a double agent, because we are at war. Its amazing how with the rise of such mass media and social media and all the resources of communication, we are failing so spectacularly at actual communication, because all of this can be solved if only we started to listen. The only antidote to this extreme fear and hate is compassion, and that is prohibited. All I can do is try to speak to all the compassionate people in the world- Thank you, you are the warriors that will deliver us from this hell, you are the only ones trying to keep this circus together, and you are getting attacked by all sides for this. We see you for your courage and sacrifice, because you are prioritising 'need' over 'deserve'.
Great timing! That whole scenario about deepfakes made me extremely uncomfortable, and made me so sad for the girls involved (especially because they’ve expressed their disdain for being sexualized without their consent. I’m honestly afraid to post my face on the internet because of these kinds of technology. It’s a really cruel world
dont mean to be that guy, but its not just girls involved. even moistcritikal who made a huge video on it going through the situation has had deepfakes made of himself, except you could argue its even worse in his case considering he is a straight man and the 'activities' these people had his deepfake performing were homosexual gangbangs
At this point posting pictures of yourself on the net has become extremely dangerous (again).
Porn isn't the only problem, with those AI programs you can be shown to do pretty much anything, so someone could create a video of you committing a crime.
If your voice is also available they can even create a confession video to that crime.
Porn is by far not the worst that can happen
It also made me uncomfortable and I have to agree to Dr K - I realized that being so uncomfortable is also a result of feeling connected to all these people und thus part of a parasocial relationship. Why do we feel so involved in all these streamer dramas? Here's the answer.
People have been doing this with photoshop 15 years ago. I dont know why is everyone so surprised all of sudden.
@@simpsonovci95142 it was just brought to light by a youtuber accidentally showing he paid for a site. also the technology is getting exponentially better (well worse for its victims).
I'm glad you're covering this topic considering many twitch viewers seemed so unbothered by the whole thing, and you can have a great impact on young men
I don’t think people are unbothered, it’s more of there’s literally nothing they can do.
@@zyndustry No, a lot of men have been very vocal that they think it's stupid that the women are reacting negatively. They have no compassion for it whatsoever.
@zyndustry I've seen many people (mostly men) talk about how it's inevitable and the women affected should just suck it up since "its part of being a public figure"
sorry if my question seems kinda pushy, I really dont mean to dig but what happened?`I understand that this topic is harmful to people, could have guessed so before this video but why is it relevant now? Did something in particular happen or is this just general information
@@Owandres A big streamer got caught watching Deepfake porn. Big drama between the streamers...
Thank you so much for this video. I've been having paralyzing fear and anxiety over some pictures I had shared with an ex I didn't end in good term with although he never threatened with those ever. I was 18 and stupid and seeked his validation. Broke up at 22, and now at 25 I'm crippled by the fear of how badly it could affect my career if any of that lands up in the hands of the people who can impact my life. And for months I've been reading every other post on the internet about what happens to the people this happened to, how their career got ruined, and really nothing looks hopeful. I'm scared, way too scared at this point to even function properly let alone progress on my career.
i know your feeling. i shared my photos with someone for 8ish years, i was groomed my entire teens by him he was way older, and only when i turned 19 i realised how messed up it all was and i left. although he hasnt threatened me or anything, i am really scared that he will someday release those images. i know it would land him in trouble since i was young, but im scared he might release the photos i sent after turning 18. im an artist trying to build an online audience but i get really demotivated because he knows my accounts and im scared someday he will cripple all my effort and spread my images online or to my family with my username tagged. i want to start over and just make new accounts but he knows my real name so he can find me. i feel unfair not even being able to use my name online anymore due to the fear
@@mimikyu_ oh god! My heart goes out to you, I really don't know how anything can be done to protect us from the fear of humiliation and shaming, the world will tell us we deserve it for being naive. I like to believe no situation should be hard enough to keep someone who had no malicious intent down. However like he discusses in this video these crimes, the very public nature of it has never been experienced by humans ever before, we never truly know how it will unfold for every individual. Here's to hoping we stay safe and protected.
That's really rough. Look, let's be honest. No one knows what the future holds. We can only hope for the best and prepare for the worst. But, you really should not continue to read about this stuff because it's not healthy for your well-being. Anxiety is like a beast that wishes to be fed and is never satisfied...
I don’t know if this will make you feel any better but I’m in a similar situation on the opposite side. I dated someone when I was a teenager, got engaged to them and we broke it off when I was 22. We had made numerous videos together, hundreds that I had saved on my phone. The relationship ended very poorly and we haven’t talked since. As someone who has access to those kinds videos on an old phone, I have NEVER thought of doing that to her. No matter how much I hated her at the time, and sometimes do still have negative feelings towards her, there is nothing she could do to me that would make me feel like it’s ok to share those videos anywhere. I think most people understand the weight of sharing those things, and that understanding only grows with age. It’s likely that if you’ve grown as a person, they have too. You don’t have to, and I won’t presume to know your situation, but if it’s appropriate I would suggest maybe talking with them about it. Some closure goes a long way, I never got any, and I don’t think she did either, but in my situation I will never know as she still has me blocked on everything since we broke up. If it’s eating away at you as much as it sounds like it is, finding a way to have closure with your ex might be the best course of action. You’re not alone!
@@Blue-zb7fs I can't tell you how much this meant to me, idk how long it will hold up but your comment really gave me some much needed comfort.
The thing about my relationship is, I never saw him act so out of character ever in 4 years, from this always calm composed person to a complete wreck, it was hard to trust my judgement of people after that.
I did infact try to talk to him about it, after a year of our break up, he didn't try to assure me or dissmiss me neither threatened me, just had an "ya fine whatever I don't give a damn" attitude, so that wasn't much assuring. That door is closed.
However, thank you so much for your kind reply. Really means a lot.
SweetAnita provided a perspective about Deepfake I never thought of before. Essentially, Deepfake is making profit off of the copyright of someone else's image, and they're not even compensated for it.
This makes for a very interesting debate about passing legislation surrounding Deepfake if they approach it from the angle of copyright law, which will also involve Fair use and privacy law in the conversation.
Edit: No one's saying that there aren't other issues regarding Deepfake, nor is copyright the most important one. Deepfake is wrong on so *_many_* levels and profiting from someone else's image and not even compensating them is one of them and is a topic worthy of discussion.
I still think it's disgusting that photographs of people are property of the photographer, and the person photographed has no legal control over that photo, even if they didn't realize they were being photographed at the time. And it's entirely legal to go around taking photos of strangers without their permission, too. Deepfakes are just bringing this to a whole new level... Why doesn't the law consider us to own our own image?
We'll definitely see copyright implications, but that can only partially mitigate the issue. For example, a lot of the stuff being published isn't for profit, it's just out there for free titillation, and as these programs and PCs become more powerful, the paid content will become less and less a part of it. I would not be at all surprised to see apps in the near future that can do real-time deepfaking on any video based on a supplied face.
And then what can you do? This genie is out of the bottle, and I don't see any way it's going back.
I mean first and foremost it's breaking the copyright of the initial porn production company and there is no way that you can argue fair use with this. Their whole work is used (background, sound and the bodies of the actor and actress). That's basically like taking a book and replacing one chapter out of 20, that's not fair use.
@@demiserofd at that stage perhaps much of the harm has gone away. If it's not of the Internet to affect people's reputation...
This is why the sympathizers I’ve seen online for the people involved saying “but poki and maya aren’t lewd streamers!” Is so stupid. So if they did SW they deserve this? If someone stole someone’s idea at work and got a raise for it and then got everyone to see it as their idea they’d be rightfully pissed. But imagine on top of that the idea is your face in sexually compromising situations. It drives me mad that even the people condemning this STILL think that women deserve to be used if they do SW.
I fully agree with the part about people figuring out how to abuse our dopamine system for profit. I feel like this is becoming exponentially worse since I understood these concepts. I feel lucky to have (mostly) grown up in a world without streamers, dating apps and tiktok.
It's the logical expansion of an economic culture that values and rewards exploitation. This has been happening way before the internet and has been made into an urgent crisis due to the internet.
I second this.
so like virtual drugs
@@Zero-9909 I would argue that the internet has been worse for humanity's mental health than all of the worst drugs combined.
@@major7flat597 probably drugs can still have a stonger impact on an individual level, but since the internet affects so many people you are probably right. To be fair though, I would say that the internet also has many more positive effects than any drug ever could.
Exactly. I hate that I even saw "Feminist men." Saying that it comes with the territory. Yeah, it's understandable that if you're famous in some way people will find you attractive. But I only ever hear this when it's a woman involved. It just translates in my head as: "You should know, there's consequences for being a woman. You should expect that always."
That's a good way of putting it. I have often felt as thought I was being told throughout life that, as a woman, I should expect to be mistreated and I should be flattered by it. I should expect peeping Tom's, I should expect to be pressured to have sex or provide sexual photos, I should expect to be desired to the point that I don't really get a say and that I should be GRATEFUL for being wanted. I don't care how desired I am. The moment you take away my ability to make choices and make my entire life about how people want to have sex with me, you've taken away my individuality and my humanity. I don't want to live that way.
Why do you think only women are told this
There is suffering in life. Discussing who/what gender suffers more leads us nowhere. In the end we need to sit down with who we consider important in our lives and ask them what do they truly expect of us in a day-to-day basis. If we can deal with what is said, great. If not....we have two options. Work to maintain them in our lives...or cut contact. Up to you, have a great day!😊
I’m commenting because I really want this to be bumped up in the algorithm for as many people as possible. What you’re saying is SO true. We need to really look at ourselves and recognize why we’re okay with hurting other people. This scares me deeply, the state of the world :(
The scariest part is that it's an infinite loop. It's being perpetuated by everyone involved, even if subconsciously. It's scary.
Same. What gives me hope is that there's also good communities and people in this world like Dr. K, who are able to see what's going on and speak up about it. The world is always changing and evolving towards a collective equilibrium
Same. Extra bump.
Agreed
bump!
Thank you so much for speaking up about this, seriously. As a woman competing high-level in esports, I've experienced a fair share of uncomfortable interactions and men feeling entitled to my likeness. I can't fathom it being so much worse being part of deepfake porn... it's absolutely horrifying, as is the amount of my peers saying it's not a big deal. "This is not good for anyone involved," absolutely. All around very dangerous behavior.
I think an important point to make along with this is that some of these streamers rely on these kinds of people for their money. I don't disagree with anything Dr. K said in the video, but to play devil's advocate here, many streamers encourage parasocial relationships and prey on these lonely men for donations. That behavior itself has grossed me out on many female streamers to the point where I don't really watch them anymore, the culture of creepy men donating and the streamer going along with it or being nice to make sure they keep that stream of money is very disheartening to me. The point he makes at 22:15 really applies to how these streamers are treating men, so when those parasocial relationships are encouraged, it doesn't surprise me that the lonely men who feel a connection would turn towards something like that. It doesn't make it excusable, but I think pushing an audience away from that behavior as a streamer would do wonders against making stuff like this happen if we're concluding that the parasocial relationship is the reason for incidents like this. I think that's what most mean by "it comes with the territory." Don't know if that'll help with the horror you feel from your peers saying it's not a big deal.
@Alexander Grant FACTS. This is what I was looking for. Discouraging the behavior wouldn't get rid of the problem, but it would definitely decrease it significantly. But sadly these streamers won't do it because it's an easy way to make bank
@@Alexander_Grant yes this 🙌
@@Alexander_Grant I've always tried to be clear with viewers or fans of mine that we're no more than acquaintances unless we actually hang out outside of my content/tournament sets. I'm even asexual and never wear revealing clothing, already in a relationship (engaged), and typically just keep to myself and my friends aside from tweeting lol. Unfortunately even then, I've had to deal with a copious amount of inappropriate interactions with both men and women in person, but of course especially online. I agree that boundaries need to be more clearly set by streamers more, but unfortunately I know from experience that even if you do, some still feel entitled to you. It's rough :/
@@KiwiBurdie Yeah, it's by no fault of yours that those creepy experiences happen, that's certainly something you personally can't completely fix are the creepy ones. Setting boundaries is already much better than a lot of the streamers out there. It'd be interesting to me if Dr. K would actually talk about how to set boundaries as a streamer (unless he's already done it, I didn't watch his streamer interviews, they were boring to me comparing to the regular people) to help those who have this problem, especially since it seems common among female streamers. Thanks for replying, I certainly see your side of things, it seems like what you're saying is Dr. K's idea of parasocial relationships causing this problem may not be the entire issue? Even with not promoting parasocial behavior you still get harassed?
i cannot stress enough how comforting it is to see people like you on the internet giving such balanced opinions.
It’s not a balanced opinion and Neutrality is also a bias. He said men are in crisis and specifically centered especially the part at the end around men. Saying be empathetic and nice to people is not balanced idk. It’s right
Worst Dr. K video I've ever seen.
The hypocrisy is incredible.
What an absolute banger.
It might be good to do another video or two going more in-depth on how to actually be compassionate towards people when you just feel resentful. It can be a super difficult thing to overcome, even if you're aware of it. Even if you're convinced rationally that it's the right thing to do, it can FEEL so wrong in the moment because you feel like you're being betrayed, not listened to, and that there's a lack of justice or fairness. Personally, I think one step in the right direction is that more people (men and women) need to be encouraged/given opportunities to talk about their feelings without judgment. There's nothing wrong with feeling those things, it's how we act on them that matters, but I think a lot of people just don't ever talk about their feelings in the first place and just skip straight to lashing out. I know that approach has helped me, at least.
edit: to clarify, I don't think one should try to have that conversation with the person they're feeling resentful toward, at least not in the middle of the conversation that triggers those feelings. I've learned from experience that in those situations, people often aren't in the right emotional state to listen to YOUR concerns in a nonjudgmental, objective way, and you can just end up making things worse. I'm advocating more for people to find others (therapists, friends, family, coaches) who are willing to listen.
Well said Andrew. Very ensightful.
Banger of a comment you made here 💥
+1
My problem with this is that many times whoever is in the other end just isn’t interested in a genuine engagement. What do you do then? It’s not easy.
Yes
I’ve had enough bad experiences with men that it’s very hard for me to trust them anymore. Watching men tell the victims of deep fake porn that they shouldn’t feel any type of way about it has made it 10 times worse. Most of my bad experiences started with some dude ignoring what I said I was feeling, deciding he knew what I “should” be feeling, and then acting like that’s what I actually *was* feeling. There’s no more reliable signal that I can’t trust someone not to hurt me than that.
I can really understand this, growing up i noticed quite fast that i felt alot more emotional than the guys around me. To a point where i stopped being comfortable around them and felt alot more understood and comfortable around girls, while that did come with occasional extra bullying in school, it didn't really matter because the lack of toxicity and empathy really improved my life alot.
mhmh, i lived with suppressed feelings for a long time, so i didn't realize how bad it was for me to engage in arguments about how i'm feeling. When i say how i feel and the guy i'm talking to disagrees, i really shouldn't try to defend my position with logic about why my past experiences would cause me to feel like that. My feelings are not up for debate.
I felt like those men were so condescending in their assumptions that they understand my feelings better than me. It really is mind-boggling how otherwise reasonable people are suddenly so irrational. It is obvious that they have so much less data about the situation.
Wait your really bad experiences that made you trust no men was ignoring feelings? If that’s the criteria I should think women are the devil 😂
Give men more time. Set strong boundaries so you can only let the stable healthy man in your life. Don’t settle for less.
I am so careful in dating and so suspicious. It's so hard to vet people today. I move at a snails pace and I am always looking for red flags or manipulation. It feels like therr are no good guys left. . . And those that act like and say that they are are the ones that should be trusted the least.
i'm just so scared about my female friends. a lot of them have been in situations where nudes were spread without their knowledge or consent. now add to that that soon people will be able to create fake explicit stuff with their faces on it. this is gonna affect regular ass people so much. a streamer at least has the platform to spread the word that "hey, those are deepfakes" but with regular people it'll just ruin people's lives
Thank you! I'm so glad you made this video. The people who didnt see a problem with it cuz "it's not the real person anyway" or those who say "once you upload an image of yourself in the internet then you consent to people using it" were driving me insane.
"It counts as consent" is an argument for people don't have any moral standing but don't like being correctly called immoral.
@@VullVull You're not incorrect, but you're also giving into exactly what Dr. K describes here. Most of those people are most probably harboring resentment from past experiences and are unloading it on someone they perceive as "better off". If they get to see this video, actually give it a moment of thought, and then they see the comment section dumping on them as lacking any moral standing despite finishing the same video, it's not gonna help them in their introspection.
Someone needs to be the first to let it go and offer compassion instead of condemnation for this to even just begin to unravel.
While not giving consent, you're still opening yourself up to the horrors of the internet, consent or not. This is something that needs to be taught by parents AND ECHO'ed in school at an extremely young age. I'll be teaching this to any children I might have.
@@zeke7515 While it's important to protect yourself and be cautious, I think it's more important to address and fix the real issue at hand which is those who make the internet unsafe in the 1st place. Like what causes individuals to act such a way online? They're definitely not well-adjusted people so what issue is going on in their lives that influence them to behave this way?
@@EggEnjoyer It's not impossible it's just more harder than being cautious. Telling victims and potential victims to do all the work of having a fun and safe internet experience is just a flimsy bandaid for the problem, not a cure. Also yes, it's more important to teach people to not be a bad person instead of telling them they're responsible for any harm they experience.
I dont think teaching people to protect themselves inherently leads to victim blaming, but if others constantly push the idea that "your safety is your responsibility" (which only teaches us to be cautious) instead of "it's our responsibility as a collective to keep everyone safe" ( which teaches us to be cautious *_and_* to not hurt others) then you get situations where people blame a harmful event caused by someone else on themselves because they failed at self-protection.
I can not understate how comforting it is to hear a man saying these things. I'm literally crying. It's sad that it's so moving to hear someone who actually is compassionate and treats people as autonomous beings entitled to respect and dignity. It shouldn't be so rare but it is and I am grateful for your content and your mission. Thank you so much.
Most people obviously treat the people in their social environment like "autonomous beings entitled to respect and dignity", but with huge numbers of basically unknown people many dissociate from the fact that behind an online image there's an actual person behind it. This happens all the time online. Do you see how we treat each other online? How we insult and berate, how we judge and defame? Most of us would never do this in person and not just because we would see more direct consequences. Similar to how we havent evolved to deal with the hate from 10000s of people, we havent evolved to emotionally image 10000s of people feeling empathy towards them. This can go two ways. One is the one above. The other is people having actual issues with feeling empathy for sometimes millions of people at once. This leads to extreme psychological distress.
@@IsomerSoma Wouldn't it be better for someone to disassociate these images from a real person? Yeah it is in the likeness of the person, but if they believe that it isn't real, it becomes nothing more than fantasy.
I know these images are a problem, but there is little we can do about them but to bring awareness to them.
@@IsomerSoma there's a name for this: online disinhibition. people can react to each other with whatever emotion they feel like online, same as irl, but in the absence of immediate, real consequences people feel safer being rude to each other.
@@Zero-9909 What if they can't and they feel suicidal over the non consensual use of their likeness in sexual content? That's a heavy burden to face and what if it's not a streamer at all? What if it's deepfake porn of a regular person that is released and seen by their friends or family or employers. Now they have the burden of proving it's a deepfake and not really them. You think they can just forget it after? This is akin to SA or revenge porn. It's awful and while you might be right that not much can be done I do hope legislation can be passed similar to the ones passed about revenge porn. I think this is going to increase the division in gender relations. I would not be friends with or associate with a man who supports or uses deepfake porn.
@@ezaf5989 Hey, look at you taking one for the team by making the good doctors point. Thanks, bro!
The radical empathy in your videos is fantastic. I hope this gets more views.
Whether you're pissing everyone off or making everyone happy, you're spitting facts so keep it up, Dr. K.
All hands on deck! yessir!
“We’re screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who doesn’t deserve it” that one was a gut punch
I think its important to note that you can be as kind as you want to someone who may have been hurt before, but dont do it at the expense of your own health. you can be kind and still say that you cannot help the way they need it.
This video is desperately needed. This issue and many others inspires my actions as a philosophy student to try to revive empathy. Thank you Dr. K, for being a bastion of hope in the gaming space, your tireless efforts do so much in inspiring me and likely many others!
@@FreneticFolklore I don't think I can save the world haha, but I can aspire to do my best and have a positive influence on those who I can!
@@liamfletcher2636 thank you for using philosophy as it is meant, helping the world, and not getting wrapped up in “debating” and other ego-driven bs
You know what? There are a lot of people in this world who have not been shown the empathy that they deserved. Who have been abused and mistreated. And yet we manage to treat other people with decency.
Yes, different people respond differently to different things. Obviously it doesn't excuse them, but it's a good thing to notice and work on.
@@JB-mh5xy You misunderstand me. Treating people with decency is not the same as letting them walk all over you.
@@JB-mh5xy so, again. Treating people with decency is not the same as allowing yourself to be mistreated. Being overly empathic/forgiving/obsequious and being cold/cynical/angry are not the only 2 options.
Sounds like you swung from one extreme to the other.
That’s the exact kind of thing that he is saying is bad. You don’t need to one up rude people.
I don't consume in deep fake porn or any of that stuff but I realized from this video how much I do have a bit of a parasocial relationship with some online personalities and really made me think about it. thanks.
Wow, this segment just made me realize I'm damaging myself by carrying on a parasocial relationship with my ex by consuming our old videos. I've personally felt neglected and more resentful of my ex after consuming them even though they are no longer in my life and I know in my mind I cannot have any expectations that come from a relationship.
Your beating it to old videos of you and ur ex??? Bruh…
@@Macheako Who doesn't? lol
@@Macheako dude where is the compassion.. Vincent just had a profound realization and you're disregarding his feelings
@@Macheako ...
@@vane909090 ...
I am not a victim of revenge porn, but I remember being younger and sending nudes for the first time. I always made sure that my face was censored so no one would recognize me, but I remeber very vividly how I fighted this one guy who I shared my pics with, and being absolutely terrifed of the possibility that he might show my videos to someone else, and post it on the internet. I was extremely anxious, and alone at the time, so all I could do was crying and hoping that no ones sees it....
It's been a while now, and I currently have a boyfriend who I wholeheartly trust, but if one day he posts pictures of me... I have no idea how I'll cope with that. I cannot imagine how it must be for a victim to be humiliated like that, my heart goes to them.
I think it's because no matter how "liberal" a society becomes, us individual people will always still treat sex and related things as taboo / something to be ashamed of... in my opinion this requires much more analysis than done in the video to really get down to the root of the problem. Because people will always have something to be ashamed of, whether it's something they've said, done, their physical appearance or social status, and in part it comes with being aware we are always inadequate no matter who we are.
I would like to write a few more paragraphs about this but I really need to think deeper about it and currently don't have the time, so this will have to do for now.
If you keep your bf at good terms when you break up he most likely will still feel a level of attachment meaning that he would be unlikely to just release it and by good terms I mean never insult him or be rude just because you feel like it.
@@--LZ--- The problem is not that we are squamish about sexuality as a society. Or that we're just too easily ashamed. It seems you are hinting at / suggesting that if we were more open and shameless about sex the problem wouldn't be so bad. But you can't and shouldn't abolish shame as a human emotion. Sexual intimacy is intimate and not meant for public consumption. It is normal and healthy to desire privacy about one's sex life. Shame is the natural consequence of revenge porn. That's what makes it so bad in the first place.
@@rolandxb3581 " It seems you are hinting at / suggesting that if we were more open"
Were you imagining something while reading what I wrote?
You made something up that you imagined and continued to write a comment about it, basically talking to yourself.
If you actually read what people write and listen to what they say instead of inserting your own thoughts you might have a fruitful discussion.
@@--LZ--- I do believe if people would be more open about sex, this wouldn’t hurt as much, but we cannot deny the fact that revenge porn, specially for woman, affects her life in a way that could literally destroy her. Losing her job, being humiliated by her family… those are just one of the few things that can happen.
For me, the true problem about revenge porn is because sex is a very intimate and private thing, I do not enjoy nor do I consent sharing my pics or videos for everyone to see. It’s a violation of my privacy, and I feel really sad, and disgusted that someone shared it, and the fact that some disgusting person will get off of it. That’s the problem.
I hope that the people who need to hear this hear this. The thing you mentioned about men learning to better manipulate girls in red pill circles of the internet scares me. An old friend of mine that I fell out of touch with has gone hard into that stuff and we’re not close enough for it to feel right for me to call him out on it. But he says stuff about how he’s always manipulating people to get what he wants and he doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with it and it is just scary.
@@JB-mh5xy people forget manipulation has its consequences, and who's to say that friend is happy with himself and his life? sounds like a broken man who's manipulation will repel any real genuine relationships and make him lonelier than he already is
@@JB-mh5xy Id he has to resort to manipulation, then that means he's not getting what he wants
Why do you hate on a man trying to use the resources around him to better himself?
@@naglfar6305 he's not trying to better himself. Trying to achieve short-term and short-lived goals and pleasures maybe, but definitely not trying to help himself.
@@Thierce ultimately red pill is a tool. How you use it is up to you, if you use it for short term pleasure then that is what you'll get.
But you could still use those principles for long term goals, people only hate it because of the dating aspect of it, I doubt they'd feel them same if a person used it in academia or the workforce
damn, haven't seen dr. k this fired up in a long time. this was such an important conversation, thank you
I clicked this out of curiosity and honestly have never watched or barely even know anything about the Deepfake stuff, but something you said had such a huge impact on me so I felt like making this comment. I find I am often able to write off someone elses pain and not truly empathize with them. This has made it harder for me to connect with people. I need to reflect on where this is coming from for me. I think it could be due to me being an agreeable person that has had my fair share of situations where I am taken advantage of or lied to. Thanks Dr K, appreciate your wisdom and passion.
Thank you so much for sharing ♥
Im a women who is going through something not quite but very close to this, and the reaction to the deepfakes crushed me. Ive been doing better now, but its still a struggle. I was in therapy but haven't been able to go for awhile for various reasons, but one of the things I have personally been stuck on is my attacker. I don't want to describe the whole situation, but I don't know who my attacker is. They were in the wrong completely, but a part of me still feels empathy and it feels weird. I'm glad you made this video, since I've been so pulled by it. Part of me wishes I could just dismiss the person, but I just can't wish ill on people. Im personally somewhat satisfied by my feelings on it, but I'm glad to have them validated. A part of me hopes that person did grow to be a better person. I don't believe it'll happen necessary, but I can hope.
The fact that businesses (or not) have figured out these things about the human psyche and are exploiting them with every chance they get is increasingly disturbing for me. Psychology is something that people have failed to take seriously for a long time (way before the term was even invented), and that is literally the reason the world is so messed up today.
Especially with video games. And the investors doesn’t care about how a company makes a profit.
@@killertruth186 I guess the reason why this has yet to be seen as an actual issue is because all the companies are making the big bucks from it and none of them have the moral backbone to stop doing it and actually start fighting it in whatever way.
It is an extremely dirty and short-sighted way of doing business from a moral perspective, and if history has ever taught us anything, is that dirty shortcuts for short-term pleasures bring nothing but long-term catastrophe.
i actually don't think its the reason the world is messed up, thats a pretty complicated set of reasons. it might boil down to a mixture of ignorance and various forms of 'sin' across humanity, though even going into that is a big job, so so many variables
😭A few years ago, I was in a university library trying to pass time, and I was looking for a book on video games, since I had an interest in developing video games. I was hoping for any kind of book on the history of video games, maybe something about level design, even about psychological damage caused by video games. Heck, even a tiny book from the 80's about making games in BASIC would have interested me 😅
They had ONE book under non-fiction: video games
It was about *gamification*, not video games
and it was a book on all the ways you can psychologically imprison and trick people so they keep using your product
"use this kind of timer to create urgency", "give badges but space them out farther each time", "try using these colors", "use a sense of personal connection by using these elements..."
it was horrific and it scared me, I felt like I had opened a book of black magic
it was also EVERYTHING I hated about mobile games and their stupid manipulative in app purchases
of course the examples in the book were all "beneficial" like elearning, but it was clearly targeted at increasing consumption and fostering addiction
@@killertruth186 and there's the inevitable circle back to capitalism. Doesn't make you wrong though. 🙁
Thank you for sharing this I have friends who were victims of revenge porn and had their bits plastered all over stupid websites. One girl I knew even had to change her name and drop out of college because of the harassment she was getting. She wasnt a famous streamer or anything, just a person from a small town I used to go to school with and she reached out to me years ago about it after why I asked she changed her name on social and made a new profile. It was disgusting. All because she left an abusive partner… he doxxed her college information too… and it hurt her career for a while. I tried to help her get the website shut down bc tons of innocent women and men were up there but this was years ago before there were the laws and protections we have today. I’m not sure if it’s still up, but she’s in a better place now. But god it was so horrible what happened to her and what continues to happen to people. Hell, look at all the nasty secret camera stuff that happens in places like South Korea, I’ve heard some sick stories there too of women who rip cameras out of screw holes or ceilings…
The same bs happens to OF people too their nudes get abused and thrown around Reddit forums. People are just so gross and need to stop.
I’m not super active in the twitch community but when I heard about the deepfake drama I was so pissed. How low can you sink? And then to accidentally stay live? There’s ethical ways you can enjoy porn and sex ffs 🤦🏻♀️
I wrote a paper on hosting liability for image-based sexual abuse (I on purpose avoid the term "revenge porn", as the phenomenon is neither porn nor a retaliation for a wrongdoing) in my university years. The number one issue about this phenomenon, the way I see it, is the lack of a clear social unity against it. The fact that so many people don't even know it as a crime and fail to consider this a moral failure on the party who commits the abuse is honestly shocking, and a real problem. People need to stop viewing it as an edgy flavor of porn and instead recognize it for the abusive and dangerous behavior that it is.
would love to read the paper! is it available somewhere online?
Revenge does not imply rightfull action. Technically the crusaders and the Muslims ended up getting revenge on eachother but at some point it was revenge for something that isn't wrongfull.
Ilegal in NYS
I want this to be trending tbh. This is what the internet needs to hear. Like really badly.
Hey man, I love you and I love how you address issues that we are currently facing and how you find a way to continue to throw yourself headfirst into the fire over in over in an attempt to help people. Your passion, compassion, and zeal for humanity is an inspiration. Keep doing what you're doing Dr.K.
It takes a special kind of moral bankruptcy to paint your friend's face on a porno without their consent.
No matter what technology is used.
It's like the AI version of finding some kind of weird sexual effigy of someone in someone else's closet and both individuals are actually close friends and the target is unaware of this.
Truly freaky.
I'm really glad you talked about this Dr.K. I was super concerned when I first learned about this deep fake p*rn stuff and how dismissive people were of it, but it makes me feel a little better knowing that professionals are talking about the topic and breaking down how harmful it is to everyone.
People are dissmisve about most things, 🙄.
This was a really intense video and I think the topic is deserving of such intensity. I myself saw a lot of people giving the "it's not that big a deal" response and I just wanted to grab them by the shoulders and shake them until they understand how seriously dangerous this stuff is. This video is essentially that. And to your point at the end about empathy and inceldom, thank you, thank you, thank you. This was such an important video to make.
Incels get rejected by women long before they have the opportunity to have an empathetic moment with a women. The incel problem has nothing to do with empathy.
Explain to me how this is a "Big Deal" because of my indifference I don't see it as one. So please explain.
@@kajjak7001 it’s a big deal because of consent. someone did not consent to this content being made and distributed. that alone should be enough. consent matters.
@@FriedChickenKyla still not really convincing 🤔
@@FriedChickenKyla You don't need to consent to being made into art. It's a category error. It literally can be made and you would be none the wiser, you could live your whole life and never know about it. It inherently does not cause harm to you. You have no right to demand people people making things using their own property (computer hardware) to ask for your permission first.
Plenty of public figures (including but not limited to politicians) would LOVE for that to be the standard, to be rid of all the gross caricatures, torture images, porn art and photoshops, and so on. Freedom of expression cannot be curbed - Je Suis Charlie
I'd really appreciate an episode regarding this mentality of kids who have watched too much extreme porn and now believes certain things like "someone would leave me if i am small, I'll get cheated on, all girls are like that" etc (sexual trolling and harrassment victim kinda mentality.)
Damn, I've never seen Dr. K be so blatantly distressed, even angry about something. Deepfake porn is a line he is not happy to see crossed, and the compassionless responses seems to be a big danger sign to him.
How do you feel compassion for something you feel indifference for? When I heard about this drama I felt nothing. When I watched multiple streamers whine about, it felt nothing. After Dr. K made this video, I've rematch it a couple times and guess what? Nothing.
@@kajjak7001 Well, I guess it depends on why you feel nothing. If you are a psychopath (and im using that term here to mean someone who is unable to experience emotional empathy on an innate level, i.e. you were born without the capacity to have empathy as people commonly describe it as), then there's really nothing you can do about it. Empathy means to be able to put yourself in someone's shoes and see from their perspective, feeling the feelings they feel. How would you feel if other people could see "you" naked (and they genuinely believe it's you, even though you know otherwise), and have complete disregard for violating your own likeness? If your response to that is, "well I don't care if someone does that to me" (whether genuinely or because you can't really understand what it's like in that position because you've never experienced it before), then I don't know what else I can say.
Should you feel compassion? Sure. But do you have to? No, especially if you have tried and just cannot. People generally have a propensity to be upset at injustices that occur. This is why people get angry when others get bullied, or wrongfully convicted, or etc. I suppose though that not everyone experiences that. But at the very least, don't add fuel to the fire. I saw a comment above that said, aptly, "I think if deepfakes make a person feel unpleasant then thats reason enough for me to have empathy. The victims are struggling and even if its legal to deepfake someone that still doesnt make it an alright thing to make" (@a stove). Even if you cannot relate or understand why they are struggling, the fact that the victims were dealt an injustice and are hurting because of that means that their "whines" are valid and should be given weight to.
Even without compassion, you could still pity the victims that don't deserve to be put into this kind of humiliating situation.
@Kaj Jak If you really don't feel compassion, then I think you have two options:
A) If you think that's a problem and you want to develop your capacity for compassion, then find someone to help you with this (therapist, coach, etc).
B) If you don't think it's a problem and that's just how you are, then just steer clear of conversations like this. I'm not judging you at all, or saying that you're a bad person for reacting that way; rather that this may simply not be the right conversation for you to get involved with.
I suspect you fall more into A than B, because you asked the question to begin with. But I'd be interested to hear your thoughts either way.
@@Hemlocker I don't have the resources necessary to buy professional help, so all I have is myself and introspection. After rewatching the video I find I feel nothing for the streamers or this deepfake "issure" they are having.
@@Hemlocker You are like the first person I've ever seen on a UA-cam comment that's actually rational and offers logical solutions. Major props to you kind stranger!
I've never heard someone capture this kind of subject like this, u really hit all the spots, without making one gender only victem or only evil.
From my whole heart. Thank you.
Dr. K you’re spitting straight fire in this one. I’ve been noticing my own resentment not just for women but for all people to some degree lately and a big part of it is becoming more mentally healthy with medications, sobriety,and therapy, but this reinforces that even more for me. I think compassion isn’t always easy because sometimes it takes effort, but that’s the ideal I want or strive for. I hope this message reaches a lot of people because it’s the truth.
Top notch commentary on the situation. I’ve always tried treating people who appeared like assholes at first with compassion because I believe in the good human element of people, but I only ever do it to the point where I can’t get severely burned if they decide to take advantage of my compassion. The commentary in this video affirms to me that if everybody did this, the world would be a better place
Do your due diligence, but try not to over stress about the effects happening immediately. Sometimes the smallest interaction become fully realized way later in life
I am someone that before the drama, I didn't think deepfake porn was a big deal. What changed my mind were people talking to me with compassion. My original opinion wasn't out of malice, but rather out of ignorance. I didn't consider the possibility that deepfake porn could be sold as the real thing to defame people.
TLDR: keep being you. It may seem pointless sometimes, but I guerrantee you've helped a lot of people.
@@justinthenoob Yeah OP is an angel in disguise by talking to people with compassion when others only show hate. Love it, never stop being you!
Thank you for taking a firm stand on this, it's way too common seeing huge channels stear away from controversial or unpopular opinions for fear of the consequences, glad that didn't stop you.
“We’re screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who ‘doesn’t deserve it.’”
Holy crap… this has me staggering… it’s… true… we have to be kind to all…
@@JB-mh5xy Okay, so let's take the 'group' out of it. Entirely on the PERSONAL level, just YOU and you alone. Do you want to be nicer to women? Do you want to be nicer to men?
@@JB-mh5xy if your incapable of giving compassion to those who don’t deserve it; don’t get bitter when people refuse to give compassion to you. This is what you wanted
@@JB-mh5xy It's sad that you brought up such a good point and all people could do was jeer and make weak overly insulting responses. Not a single one of them had an actual rebuttal to your argument, which says something.
@@JB-mh5xy Oh you're definitely preaching to the choir here. I agree with almost everything you said (apart from the parts that are personal to you; those are obviously your experiences and I can't really do more than sympathize). But I overall understand what you're saying and fully agree.
I got into a pretty passionate argument with someone (and to be honest looking back I feel like I should have been a little more aggressive) during the fall of Roe v Wade. I said that it is absolutely ridiculous that women are coming out of the woodwork, entering mostly male spaces and demanding help from us to fix this problem of theirs. Not asking, DEMANDING as if we owe them this help and favor. All while conveniently forgetting the years of open and gleeful anti male rhetoric they flooded into the media and society as a whole. But suddenly now they want help. Absolutely ridiculous.
I don't hate women, I don't hate any particular birth-group, but I think there is a very obvious parasitic relationship between men and women that everyone seems to go out of their way to avoid acknowledging.
Men are supposed to be "good allies", we're supposed to put our physical and emotional labor, our careers, our friendships, and even our safety on the line in service to their deep cesspool of causes.
Yet what do they give in return? Nothing. Not even the bare minimum of gratitude for such service. They sneer at the idea of even expressing thanks and insist they "shouldn't have to be nice to us to receive help, because it's the right thing to do".
But the worst part of this is that men allow this maltreatment by refusing to stand up and demand better under the threat of withholding help. Too many will just rage at you if you even suggest it, or gaslight you into denying this dynamic exists at all, or give moral platitudes about how men "owe" women selfless sacrifice as reparations. Or you have someone like Dr. K who wants us all to hold hands and sing kumbaya...which, I'll admit is better than the other examples I gave, naive though it may be.
Anyway I'm sorry for the angry rant. It's just that your words resonated deeply with me and seeing another person feeling a similar way brought it all up to the surface again.
@Oreo He made a very good point and all you can do is mock him, which is pretty typical of this kind of discourse.
Like it or not, there is an unequal, almost parasitic relationship between men and women when it comes to this sort of thing.
Men are expected to be "good allies" and help women with their causes, empathize with their problems, and break our own spines bending over backwards to see that they are accommodated.
Yet the favor is so rarely returned. So many women seem to find even the idea of expressing gratitude towards men revolting. I can't tell you how many times I've heard
"I shouldn't have to be nice to you for you to help me. You should just do the right thing". Or "Oooh you did the bare minimum, do you want a cookie?"
There are countless others but all of them show a deep entitlement to men's help and a disdain for the idea of showing any reciprocation.
Everything you said is really true. I think mental health is the root of most issues. I have been feeling mentally well but I feel like keeping up with all these news stories and global events can really eat at my view of the world and fill it with negativity. I feel like humans weren't built to focus on so many issues, especially when they are already dealing with their own personal ones. It definitely leads to a helpless feeling when being involved and impacted by these huge issues, and I can't really say how to fix it.
For me, deleting most social media (except twitch and youtube) has helped, but even as much as I mark political videos with "not interested" I always find myself impulsively clicking them and getting wrapped up in them so maybe the algorithm just won't stop. It's strange to finally feel some peace in my personal life only to then shift my focus to other issues. I need to limit how much I focus on the wrong and maybe give it a time and place for worrying about it because it'll always be there and I'd like to enjoy myself.
Same here, but I think what helped was getting a neutral view on the news. Mean to say accept them in the moment and act if something really can be done about it
Dr. K, I’m in awe of your content and this one in particular, from the title, the way you address such delicate topics and your use of common language to explain complicated stuff. I’m not a gamer myself but dated a couple guys who are, and I feel for them. People who struggle with addictions of any kind need our support and understanding. I wish I hd known better back then. However, it’s because of great channels like yours that I’m in a much better place now. I can’t thank you enough 🙌🏻
Somehow this actually proves what I've been saying for a while now. There's a total lack of empathy in people and we're fucked if it's not gonna change. Thank you for saying all this! It actually made me feel like I'm not the only one who sees it.
I imagine it's a bit like something I went through in high school. I came of age right as social media was invented. My first year of high school, a site called Formspring came out. The sole purpose of the site was to send anonymous questions to people. Your profile and answers were public. Being still completely innocent, I thought maybe people who had crushes on me would tell me through Formspring, cute things like that. With any new technology there are unforeseeable ways bad people can use it to hurt others. Well, on that site personal details of my dating history were made public and I was called a wh*re among other ugly names. Then the bullying spread to other sites and to my IRL social life. Probably not nearly as bad as people thinking you have a sextape, but I did contemplate suicide and was bullied badly enough I had to switch schools so I could make new friends. Cyberbullying really hurts!
I like how Dr. K just casually drops a massive FWB tip mid-lecture at 11:10
Deep fake porn being made of women who have never made porn themselves is traumatizing also because women are, intentional or not, raised to constantly be aware of if they're performing to an invisible male gaze even in the privacy of our own home. And for someone to make deep fake porn is a violation of her privacy, and almost confirms that terrible feeling we've grown up.
What you said about the male gaze reminds me of this wonderful quote by Margaret Atwood:
"Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it's all a male fantasy: that you're strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren't catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you're unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else. You are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur."
I went into watching this video with the mindset of "I'm going to learn a bit about a topic I'm not too familiar with" and by the end of the video I learned a lot about myself. I think I've developed a parasocial relationship with a lot of streamers, including you. But in a friendship sort of way and it has negatively impacted my life to a certain extent. I've also learned about a deep resentment and lack of empathy I have and that I need to seriously work on. Thank you so much for all you do for us.
Meh, I learned nothing but perhaps I've been round this carousel before.
Basing your entire moral system on a single principle and viewing all problems as caused by this is hardly uncommon. Dr ks viewpoint of empathy (mostly directed towards women) with a dash of "get men to take responsibility" is pretty common in therapeutic circles. And it's easy cod compassion is nice.
But while principles help no one principles solve all problems. It applies better here than other places
"I've seen parasocial relationships destroy marriges" - I genuinly went "whaaat, seriously?" after this. I never even thought it was possible for parasocial relationships to ruin a real life marriage. Excellent video, thank you for speaking about these topics honestly and openly, people dehumanize each other in different ways all the time these days, it seems like social media makes us see other people not as real human beings, but as some sort of 2-D characters. I don't engage with social media that much and even I sometimes notice this illusion of getting a good understanding of a person from, say, looking at their account. It's very shallow and kind of gross and that is only one of the reasons I avoid active social media use.
I like one of his final statements.
Basically, saying we're screwed as humanity, unless someone is gonna be kind to someone who doesn't deserve it.
So just in case you're reading this. It's okay to feel anything you're feeling. Your hurt is real, and you deserve help and support. Much love ❤
I'm really grateful you're talking about this. Just the idea of deepfakes has made me afraid to show my face outside.
I am FLOORED that there are people that think that non-consensual videos are ok and harmless?! HUH?!
I've been following the recent drama pretty closely because I like the content creators involved. From what I've seen, very few people have been defending the site that hosted the deepfake porn, or defend the monetization/creation of AI porn in the likeness of real people in general. It seems pretty open/shut that its existence is gross.
The main point of contention in the community has been whether or not the individual who accidentally leaked a deepfake porn tab on stream deserves to be cancelled for it.
I get what you mean, but consent is irrelevant since it's just their image imposed on a body. It's creepy, but it's a somewhat gray area IMO.
The fact that ANYONE thinks it's okay absolutely fucking kills me inside
@@bbouncy12 I have seen tons and tons of men on reddit saying it's totally fine. Said that the only issue was that he was dumb for not using a different laptop. They justified watching it and claimed they will continue to watch deepfakes and its the same as any other porn.
It's easier than to admit they have a problem that needs treatment, and I don't blame them for it, this is a real struggle too
It's unusual to see Dr. K so worked up about a topic. 100% agree with him. Magnificent video.
Thank you, as always, for using your time, energy, expertise, and heart to educate so many young humans out here on the internet. It's really important to see men like yourself model healthy ethical behavior and reach the kinds of audiences you do. It can be all too easy to act a fool online and do real harm. Cheers to you, Dr. K.
It’s honestly so hard to stay mindful of my gut reactions. Even if I do manage to notice that I’m feeling resentful or spiteful toward somebody, it’s such an uphill battle to turn that impulse off.
But you know that, and you're trying - that's what's important. I'm really proud that someone is working on themselves.
It's so hard to believe that it's gonna get better sometimes, when you see all the hate pouring in. But then come people like you, honest about their struggle to change. And I feel like I'm not alone
Thank you
It may seem trite, but don't "try to turn it off". It might sound "woo woo" but you can't change the problem with the thing that caused the problem (let's say "the mind" abstractly). I believe you will find more relief if you really try to accept the feeling-reaction from an unbiased conscious place. Labeling it can be effective, "I am feeling X". At the same time, consciously notice the other things going on, like tension or shallowness of breath, tight muscles, etc.
Something strange happens when you don't resist and just observe. The "problem" just moves on like a cloud in the sky. Rinse and repeat, because those patterns don't just disappear in one go.
@@BASEDinMaine yeah I think that’s a much better approach, but I feel it is difficult in the very same way. It’s easy to recognize when you SHOULD be employing that tactic, but it’s a whole other thing to actually succeed in pulling it off. Thanks for the advice though. I’ll carry those words with me
@@willcooper8028 just want to share my idea on this. I also have struggles managing physical reactions caused by emotions, but I think I somewhat manage it better nowadays.
Imo external stimulus is much harder to resist than internal in some cases. We dont have control over what the environment can throw at us, maybe some random jerk come at us when we are sad or angry and no one knows what kind of reflex we will do at that moment. But when its just ourselves, just like the other person said, we can observe, and simply do nothing for the time being and process the emotion.
If I have to use bad analogy, it would be like trying to eat something bad (maybe tidepod lol). Some might feel the curiosity urge to try it, but for most that feel curious, all they have to do (to not do the bad thing, i.e. eat tidepod) is simply do nothing. Instead of external stimulus, like touching hot pan where we would react before we can think what to do. Both is a bad situation for us to be in, but technically speaking removing our hands from a hot pan shouldve been "harder" than doing nothing to not eat tidepod (esp if we are lazy people lol)
So in a way its "not hard", because all we have to do is nothing. But yes its quite a hard thing to get around :)
25 minutes in of pure gold and suddenly Dr. K drops the "we are screwed unless someone starts being nice to someone who doesn't deserve it". Literal goosebumps! Greatest video in a while
I like how you are empathetic to the perpetrators. I like how you are very straight forward with the damage that deep fake porn has on the people in the porn, like you just cut right through the bs and bring out the data and you are like "no this IS harmful".
And I like how you appeal to people's better nature and encourage them to do better for themselves and for others.
The real perpetrators are the ones making the content.
Bois you gotta learn this!!! People treating you terribly can teach you the wrong lessons, and that's okay, but keeping the pain going and hurting others isn't. You can be there for someone where others weren't there for you and it will help you heal too.
rules for thee but not for me
"Just shut up and let them abuse you"
I watch almost all of your videos and I think this is the most important yet. I try to practice compassion and forgiveness every day and I use a lot of the techniques and teachings you’ve mentioned to better my life. Its not perfect, but for the first time in years I’m happy. Genuinely happy.
Neither a dude nor a gamer.. I'm a 44 y/o married mom of two toddlers 🤷♀️.. I'm not even sure how I stumbled upon your content, but it had been highly relevant to my current life-experience & I thank you for sharing your unique voice & perspective 🙏🏻
“How could someone who’s not a victim of a deepfake understand the psychological impact of a deepfake is.” THIS!!! It’s like accepting an apology from someone when you’re not the one being apologized to. They can’t say that it’s fine because they’re not the ones who are hurt in this situation-and it’s so, so frustrating when they insist that that their opinion holds as much, if not more, value as the real victim.
It's called abstract thought, you don't need to actually be in a situation to accurately imagine what it would be like.
@@friendguy13 Don’t give me that, man. That can be applied in certain situations, but not this one. Especially not this one.
These degenerate perverts are saying there’s nothing wrong with all this shit, but they aren’t the ones having their lives ruined over deepfakes that they didn’t make or consent to being shared on THE INTERNET. The fucking audacity 💀💀💀
@@friendguy13 Abstract thought is a gift, but it's not a substitute for actual experience. Imagination is supposed to promote empathy, trying to put ourselves in someone's shoes and trying to imagine how they would be feeling, asking them if this is how they feel, and that we understand and see their pain. It's supposed to help us look past the end of our noses, not to tell people that their experience doesn't match our thought process.
@@asthajindal5275 holy shit, this was so well put, I'll save it in my google drive :D thank you so much for this!
Jesus Christ, the last part of this video is a grim premonition that's being more real day-by-day. The deepfake situation in itself is very horrible but like you said, what's more horrible is that this event is one big part of the main issue happening right now in regards to online discourse where compassion and understanding between various genders (M, F, LGBTQIA+, etc.) keeps getting divided.
Psychological manipulation through dopamine addiction, the tendency for social media to elevate the most disturbing/depraved opinions under the guise of "conversation" (internet traffic yay...?), the rising movement of self-help gurus that motivate men towards psychological manipulation with such a disconnect for understanding +compassion, feminism discussions that end up being "all men bad" and I can't blame em for that, but it's also another side in the ouroboros cycle of sociological downfall which feeds in more to the "manosphere" rhetoric since other men that weren't part of that sphere to begin with end up in them eventually because their feelings get dismissed due to negative perception towards being male.
Not only is this a main problem between M vs F discourse, it’s happening in LGBTQIA+ communities as well with the toxicity of queer discourse online coinciding alongside political fuckery that puts this community in the same bucket as pedophiles for the most homophobic, transphobic, etc. reasons you can think of.
Everyone’s mental struggles are valid but I also just wish that people would be more willing to look past damning generalizations of a huge gender chunk of the human population, no matter how small that chunk is, and actually help people get out of these psychological rabbit holes, lest we end up with more new gender categories for mass shooting challenge runs /s.
TL;DR: thank the cosmos I don’t engage with online discourse that much since my autistic ass is just quietly lurking and watching these horrible trends play out and happen like one horrible cinematic experience.
great video, great message. i hope many people will see this video and reflect more about themselves and their actions
Just commenting to Thank you Dr. K. It’s really important to have role models like you talking about these issues and the matter of consent in general. As a victim of SA I’m really tuched by this topic and I hope this video reaches many people.
Thank you for covering this, Dr. K. Sincerely appreciate it. ❤️❤️❤️
I’ve never seen this channel before- but thank you for addressing this topic. You are really strong toned and defensive for the victims. I think that’s really important here because I am sure there is a sense of being powerless to victims.
Thank you - I've always been surprised at the community and how men don't treat women like human beings in some cases. Within moments of encountering them. We needed this message of compassion.
Excellent timing as always. I think a lot of people today are obsessed with getting revenge on each other and putting others in their place, and doing so under the guise of a righteous (or at least harmless) motivation. Hurt people hurting people is unfortunately a very real phenomenon.
thank you for talking about this. this is the reason i ended my 10 year relationship. he was disgustingly self serving with his consumption of women online, and i stupidly stood by and was told "this is what guys do, youre so jealous and sensitive."
naw buddy. youre a control freak that doesn't treat humans like humans.
Do you think it's possible to find a man who doesn't watch porn?
Instantly subscribed at “talk to people not about people”
All of Dr K’s content is great, but this video is absolutely top tier - I feel like it’s the most meaningful and important video I’ve seen on UA-cam, period.
I feel like the people who say "its not your body" don''t understand that its still a violation and even fi it'snot to the same extent as other forms of violation, it has a very real impact. Also another issue is that our default response as a society is "you shouldn't feel that way" instead of "what makes you feel that way".
Dr.K's analogy of having your reputation smeared was the perfect way to describe it to jaded men. Men as a whole generally value being respected by others to a high degree.