Do You Have the “Agreeableness” Personality Trait?
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- Опубліковано 30 лис 2023
- Dr. Peterson discusses how agreeableness influences team dynamics, negotiations, and even salary discrepancies between genders.
Watch the full video - • 2017 Personality 17: ...
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According to your personality test I have 0 in agreeableness and I don't agree with that at all.
Can we agree to disagree
Me "No"
That's just unreasonable!
That's hilarious 😂
If stubbornness was included, I'd score a 0 in that as well. And I won't be convinced otherwise.
@@davidanobleit’d be 100 dummy…
This is the Jordan Peterson I miss
I agree. His passion, enthusiasm and humour were gripping
Same, he's an expert in psychology and psychotherapy, and I love to hear what he has to say about it. I don't agree with him on God and some collaboration with some of the right-wingers
@@lesterdilworth1174 Don't agree with his stance on Ukraine and Jews
Same
My whole life since a child I was a very agreeable person. Too much to the point I cared more about everyone around me than myself. I thought that was the right way for a long time. Now, I am 40 yrs old and very resentful. I wish I knew the way to fix this…
Be careful. People our age wanna flip that switch. But I know enough fortunately that once you flip it, you just sent yourself down the river🤣 idk maybe it’s being saved for the “right” person in the right place at the right time 🤣
You are already nearly fixed, you are aware of and have the strength to accept your lack of aggression. Now you just need to practice being more assertive, perhaps your resentment will be helpful in that but do not go too far the other way, going over the line a few times to really know where the line is may be necessary
It's ok that you are resentful. For now. Probably a lot to be resentful about. Just don't decide to settle down and stay there.
Think if it as a precursor to forming boundaries. It's a roller coaster of feelings and thoughts most which are greatly amplified due to years of saying yes instead of no. This too shall pass.
While on the path to forging new boundaries you will likely be confronted with the real reason behind all the agreeableness. While it may be pleasant to think one is just a decent person there is likely other motives and they are often about fear of something happening if you were not. Be willing to look at that and understand the part you played in the story. 🙂
As another person said, assertiveness is the answer. Assertiveness is loving/respecting yourself and loving/respecting others when you communicate. Resenting things is a symptom of a passive communication style. Passivity is not loving/respecting yourself, but you do love/respect others. It leads to "bottling it up" and exploding in anger or becoming depressed.
Just to finish the list, aggressiveness is loving/respecting yourself but not others, and passive-aggressiveness is not loving/respecting yourself or the other party.
Please look up assertiveness. There are a lot of online guides on how to be more assertive. It has changed my life. There are completely appropriate ways to stand up for yourself that don't trample on others.
Wellp, from an open and optimistic Child to a pessimistic, shut in resentful adult - in 20 years.
*we have p r o g r e s s ! ! !*
Intimate positive relationship and conflict avoid...exactly thats what agreeable people want and care about!!
It's not about winning arguments It's about finding the truth
Yes!!!
Very few Americans will agree with that.
@@carnakthemagnificent336 because the others are still searching the *"American Dream"* xD
Somehow reminded me exactly of that
No, human interpersonal conflict is almost always about winning. It's never about solving problems and reaching a solution that's mutually beneficial, because that means not having total power. It's not about solving problems, it's about CAUSING them in order to show power--to dominate and humiliate other people to show you're the biggest monkey at the zoo.
If it were about reaching an optimal/beneficial/harmonious solution, the existence of authority/police would not be tolerated. It wouldn't be opposed, either. It would just be studiously ignored until it went away.
I've done his personality test, I'm in the 99th percentile of agreeableness. Honestly it checks out, and I find it very frustrating. I'm trying to become less passive.
I'm a man in the 99th percentile neuroticism. What to do! Seriously though, comments welcome :)
@@thomasbayer1843 We're in the same situation. If neurotic people focus more on the negatives and disregard the positives, then a more realistic and helpful way of thinking will feel incorrect to us. Like trying to convince yourself of something that is untrue.. but, if we bear in mind that we're wired to think negatively, we have an excuse to disregard the negatives even if it _feels_ wrong to do so. We can assume we're barking up the wrong tree by default. In other words, neurotic people are good at gaslighting themselves, so we can assume our immediate reactions to things is inaccurate and unhelpful, rather than taking our feelings as a reflection of reality.
kek, literally me for the first 20 years of my life
it's really quite the challenge trying to push back against those natural instincts and be more concerned with myself, but I do think it's generally made me a better person.
Where is his personality test?
@@thomasbayer1843 You need an outlet for the tendency to be detail-obsessed and intensely involved in something highly detail-oriented. If you're under 40 you could try being a religious zealot. If you're over 40 you could try starting a loud, angry death metal band :)
There is so much truth in this.
Whoever made the title and thumbnail of the video either doesn't understand this clip or is fine with making it inaccurate in an attempt to get more clicks. Looks like Peterson needs to vet the title and thumbnail before clips are uploaded
It depends on who I am dealing with. I can be agreeable but can also be disagreeable when I see the need for it. If I feel that I am being used, I can be very disagreeable. I try not to get involved in stupid arguments. They must first show how they are right with a good argument. I do not need to agree with them If I have a good counter argument. But I will respect them more for having a logical argument. I know I can be wrong sometimes so do not force an issue unless it has a bearing on my ability to live a peaceful life. Sometimes you need to fight for that.
Same here.
I've been glued to Jordan's lips for a few years now, but he seems to be struggling in this lecture, his mind seems to be erratic, I'm so glad that now, in his podcast and in interviews, he's alot sharper!
I have taken the test about 8 times, and I consistently get 98% in Agreeableness and Openness to Experience
I am in the 96th percentile in both. Does not make for an easy life.
im 0% agreeableness, 99% openness.
@@notloki3377 That’s cool. Can I ask you what you think it means to be a hyper-disagreeable person?
Me being a hyper-agreeable and open person basically means I’m so sensitive to other people’s suffering and pain, that I’m much better at spotting it than other people are, and I’m much angrier at injustice and neglect than other people are. I’ve always described myself as being someone who has to know about someone else’s pain and suffering, I can’t stand pretending it doesn’t exist or matter.
How do you perceive the world as someone who is extremely disagreeable?
@@Gar96229 I'm driven more by things that enhance myself and my goals than i am with other people's concerns. I tend to speak bluntly and honestly, and not have much tolerance for people being rude or wrong around me. this includes being rude or wrong for hypothetically nice causes.
i do care about other people. i just understand that sometimes people don't necessarily know what they need, so i try to give them what they need rather than what they think they want. i apply a more universal logic to every situation rather than assuming someone's feelings are 100% accurate.
i also tend to be kind of selfish, not out of spite, but because i know that if i stretch myself too thin i will
1.) not be able to advance
2.) will be limited in my ability to help anyone at all.
@@Gar96229very insightful, I find I share many of these qualities and am left feeling so terribly alone and confused when others don't seem affected by the neglect they witnessed or experienced themselves. I'm right to be furious, they are forlorn and deeply corrupt. We should be excising from society all those who enable or participate in abuse.
Very interesting video and not only for women but for all people who are agreeable...!
Awesome!
Oldie but Goldie
I'm not concerned with other people's problems, up until i'm presented with it... Then I kinda apply it to myself somehow. But it also depends on the problem
TIL: It is spelled "ExtrAversion" and not "ExtrOversion." I did a bit of Googling and found this on the Scientific American website:
"Folklore has it that when Carl Jung was once asked which was the correct spelling-ExtrAvert or ExtrOvert-Jung's secretary wrote back something like, "Dr. Jung says it's ExtrAverted, because ExtrOverted is just bad latin."
One of the first times Carl Jung introduced the term is in 1917, in his book "Die Psychologie der Unbewussten Prozesse", he spelled it "ExtrAvert"."
Yes, it's definitely extrA. IntrO and extrA. If you spell "extraverted" properly, your Web browser will bitch at you for it :)
So true, especially about women and being agreeable.
That was nice
If the negotiation was for my company, then I would understand the "no go" zones, consult with colleagues and be firm, but try to get to agreeable terms. If I am dealing with my own money, then I listen, try to gain better information, and perhaps yield towards the other party or fair points when affordable.
I scored high in agreeableness ugh! I'm often described as sweet nice loyal to a fault, a good listener etc. I just wanna be a brawdy broad so ill stop attracting
the Machiavellians! Lol!
I took the test separately for my personal and professional life. Outside of work I’m highly agreeable, low conscientiousness. At work I’m below the mean in agreeableness, high in conscientiousness, and I have to be or I’ll get fired. This conflict creates a lot of neurosis for me. In hindsight I chose this kind of work to balance out my high agreeableness because I get taken advantage of a lot to the point I avoid people in order it combat this problem. I also have to be cautious at work because when I get too comfortable with people I start to treat them like they’re my friends. I don’t work in a place where it’s safe to be friends with coworkers if you want to get ahead. Probably no one does.
My wife is 100% in agreeableness category . Her sister allegedly a sociopath .
Abusive relationships train you. Personally I usually deal with situations where I am confronted with the issue or person, and my instinct is not to agree to anything, deny little outright and nod, to distract with interrogative, and then to leave. It’s not perfect, because it makes me seem cowardly. Regrouping is a valid option, and people seem surprised when I am not on their side. I am however careful not to lie.
Might it be that her sister is simply very different to the rest of the family? If they are all highly agreeable and she is much less so, the contrast may be so stark that she appears to be disordered.
Highly agreeable people are often the most disingenuine. Because they're so concerned with how others perceive them and whether or not they are doing what they feel they need to be doing in order to be a "good" person. There needs to be a balance.
@@levity90 I agree. One must accept that being honest will sometimes result in conflict. And why do people feel so entitled to put others on the spot; expecting them to validate the opinion of another? My experience with this has often been that someone has a rather indefensible stance and is desperate for justification. It’s callow and divisive.
“The Unique and Its Property “, Max Stirner,1844/2017 Landstreicher translation ended this noise 180 years ago. JP try to keep up.
I am agreeable with honest people. Too bad if you can't handle the truth.
Was waiting to hear the word "extravert"...it never came.
Most people need to be more disagreeable.
98 extrovert 73 agreeable
I do not care if someone likes me or not. I like myself enough to not care what others think of me. Better to be alone than feel I need to please people.
Just like everyone else, I feel as though I have something I could add to JPs “teachings”;
Don’t be your own false idol, I learned this the hard way
Nevertheless, agreableness is a tendancy that assess how the individual face opposition,
new social interaction. Indeed, agreabless
is criteria of the personality wich try to predict how could be an social interraction where
some individual criteria of personality, like resoluteness or creativity, try more to
predict how stand a personality on its own.
Agreableness can also be a pretext to an individual to hide his thought and lie in his
thought and convinction, giving more credit to his direct interlocutor but give a much long
term meaning privation.
To be effective agreableness should be predominant in the personality in conjonction with
predominant empathy which would regulate the agreabless at a reasonable level of expresson,
preventing to going into circle of lie without degrading the quality of relashionship.
At personality level, agreabless criteria alone dont predict so much and need to be associate
with some others criterias.
I think I suffer from this problem, I just loose my own identity and interests and later down the road I find myself resentful for not carrying out my own will, I am now sort of disassociating from persueing others interest without being an asshole it's a bit challenging but for others it seems quite natural.
I'm very agreeable, in the very high end, and I am constantly baffled when I walk down the street and see people getting into pointless arguments with each other. I absolutely couldn't imagine doing it!
It's lose not loose god dammit! (yes I'm disagreeable)
@@randomisedrandomness😂
I save all my compassion for my immediate family and animals…otherwise I could care less
I’m going to say it… people like you aren’t good for western society. Hopefully you’re on a short-list somewhere.
Everyone thinks in (Dis-)Agreeable way to specific kind of persons. You are not 100 % this or that. How could you stay agreeable when I predator comes your way ?
What if you care about other people's problems but because you're nosy and not necessarily because of compassion? Lol
This video is the perfect explanation as to why men are turned off by temperamentally disagreeable women. If she has a penchant for arguing in the workplace, she'll bring that same energy into the household and that's how you end up being tied down to a perpetual migraine whose only relationship contribution is nagging.
I used to be very agreeable. I'm the complete opposite now.
Enough is enough.
Me too. I am no longer a doormat. I take a more aggressive approach when dealing with people.
Bonkers jordan dear boy your are always correct but these days you surly must be getting it depends on the moment and character of opponent
CGJ
Conscriptableness.
I like the video. But the title and thumbtail are misleading
Jordan "Do you have..."
Me "No"
No I do not!!! 😂
“You don’t want to do it *too* disagreeably because then he’s going to think that you’re a son of a bitch…”
😂😂😂
The Stoic channels have something to say about the pitfalls of agreeableness.
I know what I'm about to write is nonsense but just for ironic fun, the way so many people swallow the idiotic things from their covernment and acociates as I think they might do at the moment, more than half is, on some level, pretty agreeable.
Ha I agree with you sentiments (ironically 😂) entirely. The way that many, many people don't think independently for themselves whilst presenting as 'disagreeable' is astounding. I see this a lot in MBTI communities where a so called 'disagreeable' INTP will be like 'I relate to this so much' lmao 😜- where's the critical thought process?
What if I am only interested in other people's problems in order to mock them mercilessly?
When you figure it out, let me know. 😆
Sounds like narcissism to me
@@pat1x179 Complete misdiagnosis. You don't need to be a narcissist to be a sociopath.
And it is OK, I only do it with my friends.
It doesn't matter if you are agreeable or disagreebale in Canada, I still got deported even though I spent 6 years between studying and working to get my RP status. I was looking forward to apply for citizenship to become a UK citizen like all the legal or illegal immigrants, because Canada welcomes everyone from contractor workers, students or refugees and asylum seekers for a century. I was deported even if I did everything they told me, so yeah it doesn't matter.
I scored 1 on Agreeableness, 0 in Politeness and 21st in Compassion
lowest possible agreeable score gang!
Lol this combo is literally what defines sociopaths. Don’t kill me please.
@@Hexadeci being disagreeable isn't equal to being sociopathic, it just makes it more likely. I've known plenty of agreeable people way worse than me, because their compassion misaligned them with truth.
5:30 I just understood girl math lol
No, I'm not agreeable! How very dare you? 🤣
Pójść na ugodę.
Rozwiązać problem.
I think I am the most polite disagreeable person there is. :D
I’m disagreeable
This is free therapy ❤
Yes. Definitely far from the middle but im not in jail so thats good.
Compassion or politeness? Certainly not in a debate which resembles more like a game of chess. In interpersonal contacts however it's different. I would chose a 3rd option that is the truth of oneself in each moment. Remember also we were all born to be different. There's a lot that is a mess in our world and so there is a desire to reform like correcting a mistake. Also, it's not because someone has problems caused by exterior circumstances that he is a problem. He/her.
Intuition likes to be trusted, but do not do for the wrong kind. Be a light in the dark for yourself and remain aware of the subtle shifts of energy around and inside you. Some people comment to other people thinking that the recipient is just like them on an intellectual or spiritual basis (if they even have one consciously because that space gets filled one way or another; take gambling for instance, drugs, sports, etc. they all occupy a dedicated space that should be used wisely) and they are something else they can't even conceive. If only they had faith, maybe they would get invited but be warned of deceptive intent or immature behaviors. If you are not open to possibilities other than what you know, how can you even meet them if not in derision and scoffing?
Pretty sure it's spelt extrovert..
No
@@pat1x179 Americans and their improper spelling when using the "English language"
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I disagree. :)
That depends on what level the agreeableness is implemented, women will pursue a taken man over a single man 90% of the time no matter how they measure up
Hahaha oh god bro. I wish there was a cynicism poisoning percentage as part of this test. Praying for you
No. I don't agree.
No. I'm the personification of unagreeable.
Well this noise passes for science. God help students when try to apply this in any meaningful way to actual reality.😊
i feel dizzy watching your videos
Matriarchal hHELL
Two types of people:
Those who are dead in their sin (unrepentant)
Those who are dead to their sin (repentant)
🙌JESUS SAVES🙌ALLELUIA🙌A-MEN' 🌿
Peterson is a lightweight, semi-coherent mouthpiece for all kinds of nonsense. Take everything he says with a bucket of salt.
I find the other traits much more straightforward, whereas agreeableness is a bit confusing in my world. I’m the typical sensitive creative (very high in openness, high in neuroticism though tending lower now, and low in conscientiousness though tending higher now). My results said I was moderately high in agreeableness. I find that I am very high in compassion, this is clear, but can be all over the place with politeness because I often don’t respect authority, though due to my sensitivity I don’t like conflict/confrontation with people I don’t know well. Because of this I can play along with being polite and agreeable and smiling and nodding, especially in the workplace or with anyone I don’t know well. It’s easier to assume this role because of having a highly agreeable mother. Another factor is due to being very low in extroversion (and also higher neuroticism is probably a factor) I can be stubborn in not speaking (which can sometimes be less agreeable and not as socially harmonious). Confusing mix.
@@Jesuspiecelike911 no. I’m gonna make my own guess about you and say you’re projecting some image you have of a certain woman or women onto me? I am not this brat throwing a fit when they don’t get their way. I’d say I’m agreeable to a fault, most of the time, even for example, when I feel I’m not being respected and valued at work. I know intellectually it’s not ok, but there is a fear of confrontation and conflict due to my own sensitivity and lack of assertiveness. It’s something I’m working on. In intimate relationships I feel safer and better able to confront problems, speak up, and negotiate. I’d say I’m fairly healthy here and not throwing fits when I don’t get my way. At the end of the day, I seek truth, not to get my own way.
I get where you're coming from. I'm agreeable to a point & can present a facade of agreeableness as often times I have a lot of foresight & being overtly disagreeable isn't going to benefit the situation; below that thin veneer is a very critical mind. Of course being overtly agreeable all of the time isn't beneficial I'd just like to think that I only utilise being overtly disagreeable when it's necessary. I think there's somewhat of a happy middle road where you can air your grievances without being so obtuse about it as then people become needlessly defensive and that closes down a discussion...I can be outright disagreeable if I don't see any degree of reciprocation but I believe it's better generally to be a bit more discerning as to how one goes about it.
I find it confusing too, personally. I can be totally unagreeable with authority figures who I perceive to be “blind” figureheads or charlatans. For example, the cop who ticketed me recently at a speed trap in front of my house, with no other cars on the street, after he gave me a speech about how he’s a good guy and just trying to keep the streets safe. Safe from who, myself? I pay taxes for this? (I live in an area where this is easy money for him, because you can get shot writing these sort of tickets a few miles away).
If I don’t buy it, I’m not playing along. On the other hand, I’m an empath and these emotions come from that space. The idea of powerless people being harassed against their will really strikes me to my core. MLK was a huge inspiration to me as a kid, and I’m white 🤷♂️ I need to take this test because I have no idea where I fall.
obviously everyone has a bullcrap boundary. agreeableness =/= robot who always says yes
So if I dont care about other peoples problems, but at the same time I want to be polite (to an extent), where do I fall? lol
Higher on politeness but lower on compassion. Each Big-5 trait has two aspects that further divide into several facets. It's sort of like a tree with several branches. Anyway, agreeableness has two aspects, politeness and compassion, that determine how high (or low) someone is in the higher-order overall trait of agreeableness -- and everyone is a different mix.
For reference, I have the opposite profile super-low in politeness but a bit higher in compassion, for an overall agreeableness percentile somewhere in the 60s. Hope that helps?
I'll agree with you if you're right, not if you're wrong. If I think you're wrong, but I can't prove it, I'll disagree with you politely. Unless you're UA-cam, in which case I will threaten you.