My abusive figure skating life
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- Опубліковано 4 бер 2018
- Figure skating will always be an important part of who I am, but it didn't go without some hardships. I will say, that my experience will not be the same as everyone else's. Not all coaches are bad, I have had some coaches who will remain my friends for life. They are wonderful people. It is still a competitive sport though, and with that comes some conflicts. You just have to be wise and respond in a responsible manner.
Music provided by Epidemic Sound
TOM AND JAMIE - / tomandjamie
Hello, my name is Jamie, I do art, “how to” videos, crafts, fun silly things, and random stuff.
I love Disney, Studio Ghibli, Nintendo, Mario, visiting fun places, my chinchillas, Da Vinci, fine art, laughing at modern art, and Merlin
Also I’m married but still a massive child :’) and that’s okay
That coach sounds very creepy. I really hope he’s not coaching anymore.
HER OUTFIT IS REALLY CUTE IM CRYING
Whalenie yasssd i just wanna know where its from !!!!
Jamie how do you even survive being talented in so many ways!! We love you so much, I'm so sorry about all the corruption you had to go through 😖❤ that coach sounds awful.
I honestly feel sick from the way that coach treated you 😖 thank you for telling us about this when I'm sure it was really hard for you. ❤❤❤❤ You're amazing 😁 xxx
Zoe Ellen 〈3 that's so sweet to say to her!
My husband has deformed feet from hiking in combat boots (he's a combat veteran). I find them very cute and unique. I admire people who have done something difficult and skillfull in their lives and the sacrifices they make. I definitely haven't done much of that in my life.
A_Little_Me Don't worry! It's not the combat boots themselves. They'd literally hike 20-30 miles a day, with skirmishes and operations in between. Sometimes they'd be out in the field so long that their socks would wear thin and stuff like that. I love my Doc Marten's!
Rebecca M Thank you :) We all make sacrifices in some way! They're just normal people doing a job.
Thank you so much for trusting us with your story. I know its painful but the more stories people hear will hopefully de-stigmatise abuse~
it really means a lot to me to see big UA-camrs talking about abuse- both Physical, and emotional, as well as the impacts these leave via mental health/eating disorders~
The Anorexia hit me very hard. Seeing someone who develops Anorexia, can be distressing and we don't know how to help that person, and so we feel awkward. Having had Anorexia 4 years ago, it pains me to see that certain sports, can perpetuate a certain 'ideal' into an individual, (Not always. But it can.) I hope that girl you skated with is ok now. And I hope that you are ok too. xxx
Ellie Berry what is anorexia???? Is it an eating disorder????????
Safa Nanji Anorexia is a mental health illness that, perhaps due to difficult trauma, or perhaps to stress in your own life, the anorexic makes you obsess over your body, how it looks and feels, and think that you should lose lots of weight through starving yourself and exercising your body until it physically aches. (Anorexia is different for everyone, but the main points are obsessively counting calories and food choices, trying to eat as little as possible.)
Ellie Berry omg that's so sad! Thanks
Safa Nanji that's honestly ok. If you would like to find out more information, there are lots of websites and people who are sharing their stories on UA-cam if you would like to hear a first person account of how it feels like.
I feel the same way. I actually left a similar comment separately. I struggled with anorexia for a lot of my life, and haven't had major issues for around 10 years but it still affects a lot of my decisions today -- except now, I have to make choices to avoid reactivating those unhealthy thoughts in my head. I may not have worded that correctly but since you're in a similar situation, I imagine you understand what I'm trying to say :) I also hope she was okay, and I hope Jamie is okay too, and I also hope you're okay, Ellie Berry!
I’m so glad you were able to get yourself out of that abusive situation
Agreed! its inspiring :]
Sorry you had to go through all of that. Figure skating is my favorite thing to do everyday, but when you are going through all of that I get it’s not fun! Thank you for sharing you experience with us. Love your channel and your personality!! Happy you are living a great life now! 😘😊
Eye Katie oh hi Katie 💖
Katie~ Meh favorite UA-camr :D
Katie you are so sweet!
Please, people, if you see this video and you or someone you know is going through a similar situation, remember that it is NOT okay for a coach to act like that. It doesn't matter how good their results are. IT IS NOT OKAY.
Please tell someone -- your parents, another parent, another coach or teacher -- so they can help you.
Or even the police if the people in your circle aren't listening to you, that kind of abuse of power is never acceptable
Can we just talk about what a beautiful person she is, inside and out!! ❤
Gracie Dreams She’s such a beautiful and inspirational lady 💕💜
I see you everywhere! From BananaJamana to Doodle Date 😂
Me or Gracie Dreams? 😂👌🏻
I completely agree about your "coaches always know best" point. I had the same thing happen to me when I went from competition to recreational dancing and when I dropped out of speech at college. My coaches wanted me to be a national champion. I just wanted to have fun, and my grades were more important than winning.
As someone who has been through sport abuse, (mine being soccer), I feel you. But you know what? We’re survivors. And we have done so many good and impressive things ever since we left the unfair situations. We’ll miss it. We’ll miss the good and sometimes we’ll miss the bad. But we can never loose sight of what is really important, our happiness. Maybe the sport will come back to our life, but because we have experience we know how to make it enjoyable. Go forth, conquer the world, use those bad times to make new good ones for yourself. I admire you greatly ❤️❤️❤️
This was such an insightful video, there's actually so many similarities to dancing life too, so I totally get you!
I can hardly stand socks that press my toes together, I buy shoes a half size large so my toes have wiggle room. Figure skates sound like my personal hell 😂
Kristen wakefiej SAME! 😂
I don’t have a problem with the shoes being to little but omg my ankles are so sensitive! I always have to adjust my skaters because it begins to hurt
you should try pointé shoes 😂
I was gonna say don't go en pointé 😂
@@bookmilla8616 Yeah. Been there.
"I'm proud of those scars, it means I work hard."
I admire people like you, strong people who can talk about their struggles and the pain they went through, while still being themselves, happy and optimistic and wonderful.
I wish you would have shown us some, you sound like you were amazing at it, it would have been nice to see :) great message to everyone.
I was a professional figure skater and experienced all the abuse you talked about. My coach was and still is very famous in Southern California. I was homeschooled so I could skate full-time and I relate skaters very much to the movie Black Swan. We are treated as innocent children, and couldn’t relate to the “normal” kids our age. As I got older and my body slowly was breaking down, constant knee problems I couldn’t quit because at that time I was one of my coaches “favorites” and was winning competitions. But as soon as that changed I was thrown away like trash. Now I am much older, in my 40’s and suffer from residual injuries. But even today, coaches everywhere abuse their skaters to make them better. It’s sad and although it makes you better because you work harder out of fear it isn’t right.
Thank you for being so brave and sharing your story that I’m sure you realize is just one of many but it can help others and yours is very important. Every experience bad or good you can never forget. My only advice is any type of abuse is not your fault nor because of anything you did but because the other person is sick. I don’t know if you got help in counseling or not but it’s a great help! And remember you have so much opportunity in front of you don’t let that terrible man keep you from achieving great things!
Thank you for being so open and honest about this. I’ve been the victim of sexual abuse and it’s very true that one often feels at fault and guilty. But you’ve become such a wonderful person even in the few years I’ve spent watching you. You’ve grown, and learned, and have such thick skin now. You’re absolutely incredible, and I’m so proud of you. Thank you again for sharing!
Little bit curious about your feet now. Sorry
I think her boots were just not right for her because my boots are comfortable and I do a lot of tricks which can have a lot of impact
If you google skaters’ or dancers’ feet I’m sure you’ll get plenty of images that give you the general idea of what she means XD (even if they’re not her exact feet)
I think out of respect for her wishes (and out of her respect for the lot of us), it would be best not to ask about them.
When I saw the words 'Physical Abuse', my heart dropped. I look up to you so much Jamie, and the fact that someone would treat you, or anyone that way is terrible. I'm glad you continue to enjoy the sport, and even more so on your own terms. Lots of love.❤️
my heart is aching while hearing these horrid stories... skating is the passion of my life and i'm so sorry your skating took such a turn. BUT you found your life passion! painting! and you are INCREDIBLE.
i've been subscribed to your channel for a few years now and i come back to this video from time to time.
#BringBackTheByesByesByes
stay don't stray
thanks for sharing your story! im also an ex-pro skater turned artist, hehe. I honestly loved skating to death, almost literally. when my dad told me I was a waste of time and money after getting runners-up for the National Team when I was twelve, I became suicidal. got worse after he forced me to quit.
figure skating is such a toxic sport underneath all the lululemon sweats and flashy rhinestone dresses. hearing how you had to deal with that coach's abuse is so mind boggling to me since I personally viewed my old coach as a second mother. could never imagine her doing anything like that to any of her students. so glad to hear that skating was something that you enjoyed and not felt burdened with :)
My heart is breaking listening to this (may or may not be crying)
Me too, I just want to hug her
I'm sorry you had a bad time about the skating but I'm glad you had good times
I frikkin' love your personality and how wise you are and how wonderful and fantastic and extremely HUMAN you are. Thank you so much for sharing your life here on UA-cam ❤
This was heartbreaking. Thank you for having the strength to share your story.
I strive to live a life of peace. That story about your abusive coach... makes me want to abandon that.
Jamie I am honestly so proud of you for sharing this💖I know it must have been extremely hard to tell us all of this but at the same time you are shedding light on this because its helping others to know they can talk to someone💖so much love and support💖💖💖
Jamie.. this is heartbreaking! I’m so proud of you for how far you’ve come! You’re such a wonderful and inspiring person and good gosh, well done for talking about and being so open with us!!
We love youuuuuu✨💕
Thank you so much for sharing your story Jamie! We’re so proud of how far you’ve come ❤️❤️❤️
I'm glad you've shared this story. I'm sorry about your bad experience! It was a little painful to watch, as it reminded me a lot of my sport experience. I had good times, but so much bad stuff and drama! I hope you talking about it was a little therapeutic!
Aww, I'm sorry you had to go through those things.
I was a competitive ballroom dancer as a kid and into my teens, and I went through similar things. It's really frustrating how something so fun can subject you to such terrible things.
I'm glad it didn't ruin your fun completely though!
Thanks for sharing!
I'm so sorry you had to go through this
Thanks for sharing, Jamie. I’m glad that you still had a lot of good times even with all of the awful things involved. I have danced for about 15 years and definitely understand some of the pressures involved. I came to love dance even more when I stopped competing and just did it for fun. Love you :)
This video is so good! You are so brave for talking about these experiences. Some of these are horrible stories (especially the one about the coach), were so sad to hear about, but I'm glad you liked the skating xx
I found you about 4 years ago because my friend showed me your awesome painting. It's been SO amazing to see you grow throughout these years, I'm so glad I found you & I'm endlessly thankful for everything that you do.
Jamie, I think you have a heart of courage for sharing this video with everyone. I know it's going to really help a lot of people who have gone or are going through a similar situation. Thank you!:)
Aww...this made me so sad. You’re such a talented young person and having gone though this is unbelievable! You are still a ray of sunshine. Wow! You’re inspirational!
Damn i’m so sorry about all the bad things you’ve been through. I’m glad you kept going. You’re very talented Jamie✨✨💐
You're so brave for sharing this, I adore your paintings and video's and to see this, I'm so happy with all the choices you managed to make throughout your life. You seem so happy now and I'm very convinced that you are. You produce awesome work and are an amazing human being. Keep up being you, and everything you love c:
I’m glad you decided to open up, I’m sure it wasn’t easy. It’s terrible that you had to go through some of these things just because of the wrongs of other people but I am happy that you can now enjoy it.
Love
I'm so sorry you had to go through so much, but well done! You came out on the other side as a still-wonderful person❤
Thankyou so much for sharing this!! I'm sorry you went through that, it definitely brought me back to certain things when I was a competitive cheerleader. I would LOVE to see a video of you skating!!! 💕
Jamie you're such an inspiration
❤
Thank you so much for sharing your story and being brave enough to do so ❤️ I would LOVE to see some footage of you skating! X
I’m really glad you feel comfortable about sharing this with us. Figure skating always fascinates me and although I know I’m not going to be the person to get into it.
Despite all of this I hope you can occasionally skate for fun sometime.
I’m sorry you had to go through those negative aspects of what you love to do... you are so strong, and an amazing person, I love you 😊
You are absolutely brilliant and brave. Thank you for sharing your story. I know it's hard. 💜💜💜
So sorry you went through all that! It takes a lot of courage to talk about your personal life and experiences on camera and put it on the internet! I salute you :D
Thank you for your insight. I feel like this can be applied to many other situations. It is so horrible to hear about what that coach did to you.. I am glad that you now have such a great appreciation for the things you love. ❤
Thank you so much for sharing. As a former figure skater (who was, albeit, nowhere near your level) I now realise the impact of some of these things on my peers and myself which I never would have picked up on before. Thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart, for trusting us with your story. I do hope your experiences will provoke change so that others will only have a positive experience in the sport. 💙💚💜
I love your top in this video and appreciate you being so open and honest with this content. You’re such a well rounded and beautiful being and to see you open up and try to shed light on a topic that not many may know about is awesome.
This video touched my heart in so many ways. I love figure skating ⛸ but completely relate to everything you’re saying. Thank you for being so brave and sharing your skating story xx
i’m so sorry you had to endure such things, especially at such a young age. i hope that figure skating will stay a positive outlet for you ! don’t let horrible things ruin something you love :)
Thanks for making this video! I also skated for 10 yrs, though only competitively for 3. I think that people don't realize how hard, and often abusive, the sport can be. I feel very fortunate that I had an amazing experience with skating and my coaches were amazing and I never really felt any of the negatives from the sport, but I know skaters that did and I met coaches that were really not good people. My experience actually led me to write an anthropology paper on skating and the effects it can on skater's bodies and minds. Thank you again for the video
Jamie. Every video I watch of yours I am reminded of how much of a strong person you are. I am so sorry that you had to deal with all of this, but am so happy to see that you prevailed and came out on top. You can do anything. Keep it up, beautiful.
Thank you for sharing your story! You're an amazing person and it's your good and bad experiences that shape you into who you are today.
You are so incredible for sharing this journey. 💗 This was very personal and you're so great for sharing.
I’ve been looking into starting to figure skate so thank you for describing some cons that come with it, it’s really helpful knowing more information about it. ♥️
Thank you so much for talking about this side of skating, I went through something similar with one of my coaches and to hear someone else know those feelings makes me feel less alone.Figure skating is an amazing sport and I agree with everything you said about it being an outlet, it just has some terrible people in it. All the love to you!
Jamie I admire you and thank you for being brave and share your experience, I send you all my love💗
You're such an amazing person, Jamie! You have an amazing personality and you're so talented, I'm so sorry about what you had to go through but I'm glad you felt that you could share this story with us. We love you!
Thank you for sharing that part of your life!
It’s wonderful to hear about those things cause we get to know you more.
Second. Please bring back the “byes, byes, byes”!! That was my favorite!! 💜💜💜
I can relate almost everything from this to my dance experience. I’m sorry you had to deal with this too! You’re not alone!
I love you Jamie,your so strong! Those hardships make you, you. You been through so much and I happy your over it❤😊
Jamie, you're picking up a British accent and as a Brit I love it. 10:15 you say "lot" differently xx
Thank you for sharing this personal experience with us! You are loved!
My husband: "What is she wearing?" Me: "Milk." *husband giggles* Thanks for sharing! Sorry you had to put up with the garbage. Bleh.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. It's incredible how strong you are today! Really love watching your videos.
I took ice skating lessons for three years, I know it's no much but I got exposed to that world andI started hating it. The teachers had their favorites who were the ones who were *mean* to the others. Everyone hated everyone and made bad comments. But I still love skating!
Sometimes these things have to happen to get you to where you need to be. I have gone through so much stuff myself and now I’m at my happy spot. I’m so glad your happy now! Love you ❤️
Thank you for sharing your experience and trusting us with it; you are the sweetest, strongest artist I've have the pleasure to see in my life and I'm happy you still enjoy figure skating after all of your experiences with it. You're an inspiration 💕
Thank you so much for talking about this! ^^ It helps so much the timider of us when braver speakers like you discuss topics these, especially emotional and physical abuse. Stay strong friends
awe omg you're adorable and perfect in every way!! you have the power to inspire others with your stories
This is probably one my favourite videos you ever uploaded. So honest and genuine... I just love you so much. 😘😘😘
Thank you so much for sharing that part of your life with us! Also I would looooove love love to see a video of you figure skating! If even a 10 second video :D.
I really enjoyed this video! At the edn when you talked about all the drama, I think that can be said about anything people do. When I was in high school there was drama in band, theater, journalism, anything I was involved in, there was drama. Even now, as an art major, there is drama in my class. There is even drama in places that many people, including me, try to combat it. I'm so sorr about what you've been through but I'm so happy that you now have a positive out look on it.
Thank you for sharing your story! Also I love all the pink in this video, it's so cheery and your eye and lip makeup look so cute with the milk shirt!!
We love you so much and just know that we are here supporting you.I love your amazing new and talent and I generally just admire you as human being.Honestly it the world would be a better place if it were filled with more people like you.All I want to say is thank you for being strong and brave and trusting us enough to tell the other side of the story in figure skating.
Jamie Jo you are such a beautiful and inspiring person. I’m so thankful that you make videos like this to show your audience that we can be strong 💕💜
You are an amazing person and so brave to talk about the abuse in your figure skating and not everything in it is glimmer and gold. Your are such a strong person to be able to go through all this and come out the other end 💜
You are so awesome, Jamie! You’re such a strong individual and so talented. Keep being you!!
I was not ready for that at all we know so little yet so much.
The story went from wow,
to that makes sense,
to am happy you got away from that,
to am sorry you had to go through that,
to this doesn't change how awesome you are.
You never really know what someone else is going through and how life is for them and learning something new can tell you soooooo much about about a person. So just because someone isn't going through what you are going through doesn't mean they don't have bad days to. I love your channel and your artwork and your videos and personality really does help me relax when things start to overwhelm me and I just wanted to say thank you for that.
so sorry to hear how your coach treated you! im lucky im now training at 31 with my old coach who trained me when i was 11 :) she is lovely . You are a very talented lady and i love your vids x
Thank you for being so open about this! this was a great video
Thank you for sharing this with us. I'm glad that you felt comfortable enough with us (as your audience) to share this part of your past. You should be really proud of this and your figure skating. Also, completely unrelated but your hair looks fabulous in this!! c:
You look SO BEAUTIFUL!! I LOVE your new hair cut and the color.
jamie, thank you so much for sharing your story; it couldn't have been easy. i'm so sorry that you had such a poor experience whilst skating, but i'm so glad you came out of it retaining your love for skating. you've come quite far since then
You've survived so much, your a beautiful and strong young lady
Thank you so much for sharing such a personal and sensitive subject, hopefully it will help others to speak out if they are going through the same. 💗⛸💗
Jamie , you are so beautiful inside and out . I'm extremely proud to see how you've changed despite those horrible experiences . I'm glad you trust us to share your story , and I'm glad that I'm here to hear them 💕💕💕 you will always be an inspiration in my life 💛
I’m so glad you trust us enough to open up in a video. I feel so sorry for everything that you have gone through. No one should ever have to go through that. I’m glad you realize now that none of that was your fault. You are so strong. And I hope you continue to live life for yourself because you know what’s best for yourself and you are the only one that can determine that. I love the fact that you love Disney and animation and it makes you the cute, lovable person that you are. ❤️
i am so sorry that you had to go though all of this. i am glad however that you could overcome this and that skating is something you do and can enjoy.
I'm so sorry that happened jamie you are such a lovely person x
It sounds like you have gotten your life together. Just know that talking about it can help start the healing. I appreciate you sharing and will continue to follow your channel because I know that you are an extraordinary young person and are getting stronger and stronger.
Thanks for bringing this up! Some of what you talked about echoed some of the things that I went through as a competitive horseback rider growing up. Definitely good stuff, but also a lot of unnecessarily cruel or intense things too, especially for kids
You are so brave for sharing! I am a gymnastics coach and have left a gym because similar things were happening, I tried to get the head coach fired but I was the only one who really saw the treatment as emotional abuse and was willing to do something. The more people talk about it the more people will realize what is ok and what isn't. You are helping figure skaters and other athletes everywhere by sharing your story so that it doesn't happen to them. Thank you :)
I want to give you the biggest warmest hug ever, I'm so sorry you had to go through such a horrible situation
I can truly understand all the abuse you've suffered. Since I have a long history of being abused.
Jamie, you are a very strong woman and I am very proud of you for telling your story. You never know who is watching this and telling your story will and can help others in huge ways.
I tell my story too, not only to heal myself but to give hope to others who think there is'nt any. And truth be told if it was not for doing research online trying to figure out what is going on. Reading blogs/videos from other emotional abuse survivors, has helped me become stronger. And learn how to deal with these bullies.
Plus praying and reading my bible helps a ton. Listening to praise and worship music and doing things that make me feel good about myself. And defeating being in victim mod which I was in for years. And getting out and socializing as well. And having a mentor who is leading and guiding me as I deal with these bullies. And people showing me that I am not a trouble maker.
And learning these bullies are mad at me because I have happiness, confidence, and empathy in my life and they do not.
Jamie, you have grown so much and I can tell you are getting stronger every day. I can hear the confidence in your voice, bless you dear one. And always know you are the strongest person you know. 💚☺
Praying for you and your family and friends and all involved my friend. I hope you feel better and recover soon. I hope all goes well for you. I wish you the very best of luck. God bless you my friend. God loves you.