Everything I'm Leaving in my 20s
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- Опубліковано 29 вер 2024
- We're growing up over here! Let me know what things you're leaving behind :D
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Hey, I'm Adella! I encourage women with thought-provoking conversations, lifestyle content and oversharing with vlogs. Consider subscribing if you like my content.
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TIMESTAMPS:
Yeah so according to my maths, I'm actually 40 years old 🙃
😂😂 It got me too
Girl … isn’t it 16 years though ? Not 26 … the math ain’t mathing 😂 Love this video. I’m about to turn 30 I mean … in a year and a half 😅. I’m working on myself I wanna have a glow up from the inside out. 💁🏾♀️
Girl I watched this back so many times and didn't even clock my mistake LOOL
I came to the comments for this exactly 😭😭 14+26=40 I was confused
Damn Adella is really gorgeous 😍
🥹 thank you
Great video Adella! Love your Jamaican patois. Jamaican here 🇯🇲.
Hehe thanks!
Girl I am 27, and therapy has been a game changer for me. I started working on saying no, and not people pleasing like I did before. My therapist made me understand that I am person like everyone else who's feelings and needs are just as important as the other people's feelings ive put ahead of mine and it was exactly what I needed to hear to prioritize myself and needs. Im still a work in progress, but if you have to seek professional help to help you overcome this, take this as a sign to do so. And another thing that helps with low self esteem, and self sabotage is to believe in yourself. It really is that simple. But if you have told yourself lies and believed them for years, you will have to unlearn that and practice affirmations daily to rewire the way you think and feel about your. Love your videos Adella, you are my favorite UA-camr!
Your faveee?? Thank you ☺️ and what your therapist taught you is sooo helpful! Glad therapy has helped you too!
She just called me out as a 23 year old….I dilly dolly a lot but I’m in university
Loool
I’m dilly dallying by watching this video when tasks affi be completed 😭 Imma start once I’ve finished this video lol. Sidenote, I loveeee your top 🤩
Haha this doesn't count it's educational 👀
@@AdellaAfadi 🤣 you right, you right!
Adella, thank God that you're 6 years older than me because I feel like we are really alike 😂😂 So I get to learn and reflect after watching these types of videos. The 5 points you have made really sum up most of what I am working on in myself. I am still figuring out my career, hobbies, navigating friendships, family etc. Thank you for making this
Haha love that for you. Please learn from alllll my mistakes!
On the note of learning to live with something that isn't good, i've spent 12 years hiding my arms lol. That is one part of my body I can't stand and my clothing decisions have been based around that. The weather has been great lately and yet i'll always reach for the long sleeve. It's crazy to think about choosing to be overheated and denying myself of really beautiful clothes all because I don't want to show my ams. I really want to get over this one day
Sorry you're dealing with that and I hope you find a way to overcome it. We really are wasting so much time and energy with these things it's not fair to ourselves 🥹🤎
"Enough chit chat" 😅. I couldn't not smile!
😂
The dilly-dally point is so real. When you know what you need to do and you don't, it's like fighting against yourself
Exactly!
I am 27 and I relateee!! I think for me it's feeling like I'm on a race. Need to slow down!
Oh interesting one!
That fear of failure is so real, It’s been holding me back for too long! I just turned 31 so it’s definitely time for me to make those changes. Great video!
You got this!
Yesssss. I love this video and I feel like I am in the same space. I turned 31 this year and I also have a list of things I’m working on to live the life I actually want to live! We can start being our best self no matter what age or where we are in life. I was sharing with someone that we tell children they can be anything and do anything they want but when we are adults and actually have the ability to make those dreams happen we don’t. We think we can’t when we absolutely can! Anyway, I’m done rambling, great video as always 🫶🏽✨
That's such a good point. Life has a way of humbling us but we really need to actively fight against it!
Girl this is so good!! Can you give some practical tips and tools on how you’re planning to leave this behind. Especially the male gaze, dilly dallying & fear of failure. is it therapy we need😭the girlies are struggling out here
I will do! As i figure it out lol
In many ways we’re alike from people pleasing to body consciousness to fear of failure.
Your videos are always so informative & helpful. I’m 26 so to me your conversations feels like an elder sister giving me a warm hug, telling me that all will be well.
Thank you Adella! ❤❤
The pp is a trauma response 😩😩 still trying to be ok disappointing others it feel like life or death with my close friend but they know I struggle with it and don’t try to take advantage of
This is perfectly put!
Adella, as a fellow 30 year old woman who occasionally stares at her tiny fine lines under her eyes like crazy - nobody, I swear, nobody is giving as many f*cks about those lines, and those grays, and the perkiness of our boobs as much as we do. In fact, the vast majority barely notices these "imperfections" at all (I dislike this term because these are just our natural features, but you get what I mean). The beauty industry wants us to go crazy over every little thing, but it's a waste of our brain space. Personally I think you're positively gorgeous, and you deserve all the confidence in the world!
Thanks so much and I knowwww literally nobody cares but we obsess over it nonetheless. It makes no sense!
@@AdellaAfadi I just remember how I look at my loved ones: my partner, my friends, or even some random interesting faces outside. I don't search for every little imperfection like 'omg there's a fine line, omg there's a gray hair!' etc. I just see them in their full glory, the way they are, and I find them beautiful/handsome. It reminds me that this is, in fact, the way others see me as well. :)
30 for women is like 40 for men. Yall like 10 years ahead of us mentally😂
I love your energy ❤you so funny 😂
We appreciate the girlies in the socks and tabis 😂
Haha yeah because you get it! 😎
Money affi mekkkkk
🤑🤑🤑
😂 I’ll just apologise innit?
Okay that one about having to make a decision hit me too because I want to make the right decision one- why should I anticipate it being wrong? And that does cripple me too… arg great advice from Keith
I know! It's so hard to comprehend for me too
turning 30 in august and this message was TIMELY. like how long have you been living inside my head?
Lol we all out here living the same life!
Apologising is a BIG one. I'm turning 30 in...a week lol, all of these Adella were so relevant to me. The worse thing about people pleasing too, is other people KNOW you're trying to please them but you continue, so now we're both stuck in an unpleasant awkward situation. As for dressing, I love dressing elevated and feminine (somewhat), because of how it makes me feel and gives me a confidence boost like no-one can CHAT to me but the male gaze is not something I care for, I really get offended when men even look at me and I have a tendency now to use my hands to shoo any man away. We have moves to be making, money to make, friends to see, places to travel to, laughter to be laughed. My only goal now, is to pick the best perceived choice for myself in every moment and be self-aware and like your friend said, if its wrong apologise and correct it (even if its apologising to yourself!). My 30th birthday present to myself will be therapy. My only addition is - in your 30s you need to get a HOLD of your finances, you can't be spending just to spend...we've grown out of that now.
Adella ya look goooodttttt!! Love these revelations, 100% rooting for you babe! 💕
Thank youuuu!
Loved this video Ady! I’m 26 but what you’ve mentioned I this video resonates with me.
How did you settle on a therapist ? How do you know when to stop or take a pause on therapy orrr is it a life long commitment??
Thanks ❤
working on many of these things but major growth moment happened just now when i realized i no longer identify as a dilly dallyer! just as someone who tries her best 🥰
wait Adella did you do the maths properly 😂
LMAO I watched it back so many times and still didn't clock 😂
Hiyaa, what do you edit your intro/videos with❤
1:32 my jaw was on the floor
Right! 🥲
Love these video so much - thanks for dropping gemss 💕💕
Glad you like them!
Please make a video about your opinions on Dr Umar’s takes on racial politics, specifically interracial relationships and his belief that all white people are racist (but not necessarily bigoted).
I don't really follow his content so I'm not informed enough
Also I don't want to lol
That was helpful! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I'm so glad!
I just love how real you are ❤️
🤎🤎
You're trying to let go of your need to people please so that you can please different people (not wanting to be embarrassing)?
She wants to focus on and prioritize her own happiness before that of anyone else
Nope that's not what I meant
@@AdellaAfadi oh okay ❤️🎈 glad, would've unfortunate for you to fall back into the same trap
Adella you are simply gorgeous 🫶🏾
🥹 thank you!
The video is very helpful. Thank you so much for that.
But tbh I didn’t get the part about figuring it out. Can someone explain please ? 🥹
I believe Adella wanted to say that some of us use the excuse of "I'm just Figuring It Out" when we're actually procrastinating/too afraid to start or do something etc. It gives us this excuse to not treat our work and commitments with all due seriousness. Some of us are genuinely in this phase, but many have already Figured It Out, they know what they want to do and why - so they should truly focus on that instead.
Yep exactly what Aimee said 😊