Lessons from our exes... | Episode 116

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  • Опубліковано 12 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 194

  • @FAITH_CASSY
    @FAITH_CASSY Рік тому +197

    My ex taught me that no matter how good of a women you are you’ll never be good enough for a guy who isn’t ready to be a man

    • @edinahkendi9871
      @edinahkendi9871 Рік тому +15

      Thisssssss
      Or no matter how much you've worked on yourself doesn't guarantee that a good man will date you or you won't be in another toxic relationship

    • @dianavihenda3019
      @dianavihenda3019 Рік тому +2

      Thisssss is deep 😢

    • @lzgaks7825
      @lzgaks7825 Рік тому +1

      Sizzzzz. Very Corrrect
      We need to put this on a billboard.
      We all need to have this encrypted in our minds pre rship .

    • @catherinenaserian8830
      @catherinenaserian8830 Рік тому +1

      So true

  • @linetmutheu
    @linetmutheu Рік тому +152

    I met my husband on Bumble last year May. We got married in October, and I moved to the Netherlands this year Feb. I had my list of 19 non negotiable things that i wanted my future husbandto have. We celebrate 1 year Anniversary next week, all I can say is truly God CAN, AND WILL answer your prayers. Be very specific and don't be afraid to ask for the very best. He created all of us and knows the perfect person for you. My husband is everything I ever dreamt and more, from a life partner . I now just live in total gratitude everyday.

  • @vvvvvvw915
    @vvvvvvw915 Рік тому +24

    MY non-negotiables
    °Not violent and No anger issues
    °Emotionally intelligent and Available
    °Have A belief system[fear of God]
    °Compatibility
    °Financial responsibility
    °Caring and intentional with me and our relationship
    °Good conversationalist
    °Good hygiene practices
    °Can commit and be loyal
    °Not Selfish
    °Sense of family [healead or healing any parternal issues or sibling issues he has]
    °Sexually responsible
    °Make sure he actually likes and values me
    °Stability

  • @theshenanigans545
    @theshenanigans545 Рік тому +72

    Lesson from my ex: STAY MILES AWAY FROM BROKE/STINGY MEN. THEY WILL BE STINGY EVEN TO THEIR KID

    • @edinahkendi9871
      @edinahkendi9871 Рік тому +7

      Gurllll😂😂😂you screamt to the understanding gfs

  • @rachealwambui3413
    @rachealwambui3413 Рік тому +77

    I learnt from my ex that sometimes a man will need you when he's in a certain phase of his life and when he's done with the phase so is he with you.

  • @Rebeccamwas13
    @Rebeccamwas13 Рік тому +107

    My ex taught me that ,,never find love in a lonely place,it will have u settling for anything..
    Know urself,love urself n be happy with where u are that man is adding to what u already have

    • @joycemburu8041
      @joycemburu8041 Рік тому +5

      This!!! I'm in that space where I'm so lonely and I try to stay away from guys lest I fall out of desperation.

    • @cirutom
      @cirutom Рік тому +1

      A friend of mine once said 'usiende soko na njaa' 😂 it hit home so bad😅 coz I always wanted to get married so I always looked at the goal instead of the relationship

    • @ichooseviolence2532
      @ichooseviolence2532 9 місяців тому

      ​@@cirutomso what do you mean? We cheat first or

  • @trizarabuku
    @trizarabuku Рік тому +94

    When Jo said, 'Heal your dad wounds otherwise you'll keep dating your dad over and over again' Felt it to my core, yho😅

  • @wambuigachoki7645
    @wambuigachoki7645 Рік тому +18

    What my recent ex has taught me is ,you can be doing so well but one day they might wake up one day and not choose to be with you anymore,so love yourself a little more and move from that space asap

  • @RotchellMiller
    @RotchellMiller Рік тому +36

    When Lydia said “In my own personal growth I’m going to align more accurately to people who speak to my soul” 😭

  • @bettykubai927
    @bettykubai927 Рік тому +75

    What I learnt: Compatibility is not a You problem. They might be cute but you really have different core values and it is okay to move on to the next. 2. You can be the nicest person and have all the qualities, but you can not force a man to reciprocate, or choose you. Songa kama injili. Love the episode.
    Why are these partnerships sleeping on you. Advertise even cooking oil and we will engage with the content😅😅
    #TMI to the world for sure

    • @graciakinyanjui6937
      @graciakinyanjui6937 Рік тому +1

      exactly wel said

    • @SafariByHal
      @SafariByHal Рік тому +2

      Ata Royco… do a cooking podcast or a mukabang 😂😂😂 havé ketchup we will get that ketchup we love TMI

  • @allthingsengineering2121
    @allthingsengineering2121 Рік тому +14

    I have seen alot of growth on Murugis emotional experience ..she has become alot kinder and gives more grace to love.absolutely incredible

  • @traceytina357
    @traceytina357 Рік тому +56

    Watching this after a devastating heartbreak. Definitely what I needed to hear.
    A lesson I learnt from my ex is that you just have to be yourself. You don't have to change, you don't have to fall off from the things you like to accommodate a love that won't accept you.
    In tears, but holding on strong sistas!!!❤

    • @snyderarusa9148
      @snyderarusa9148 Рік тому +6

      You will be okay babygirl... Just grieve until it's all good,,, trust that you are going to be okay

    • @mercykiaritha350
      @mercykiaritha350 Рік тому +4

      Ughh going through it too ! We'll be fine

    • @traceytina357
      @traceytina357 Рік тому +2

      @@mercykiaritha350 yeap !!

    • @chidoshayanowako8776
      @chidoshayanowako8776 Рік тому +4

      Me too. He just ghosted me. No explanation whatsover

    • @zwad3423
      @zwad3423 Рік тому +2

      It's going to be okay, stay strong

  • @LookUpEverytime
    @LookUpEverytime Рік тому +4

    I have learned the foundation of a relationship usually determines the trajectory of that relationship. I recently broke form this lady who I found she was sharing nudes with another guy. I talked to her and forgave her only for her to feel guilty the next day. Also I have learnt that the best quality you should look for in a partner is a person who can be remorseful for their mistakes. Get someone who is kind. Let the sex be in sync and finally, a good communicator (Someone you can hold a conversation without being defensive).

  • @olivengaruiya7222
    @olivengaruiya7222 Рік тому +17

    congratulations on the win, I decided to hear you guys after seeing the award. I wondered what you guys talk about and decided to listen. After listening 3 podcast am here wishing you guys existed when I was at my 20s. You guys are big sisters for younger girls out here. My new fav podcast.

  • @yvonnemwangi2404
    @yvonnemwangi2404 Рік тому +15

    Ever since Lyd said that watching Ads earns you guys money...I never skip any ad...I love seeing you guys win❤

  • @LivingWithFareed
    @LivingWithFareed Рік тому +8

    Am going to throw my two cents and the conversation for men as much as you said that we are the chosers you still have to be chosen back in terms of whether the woman your interested in will actually have you. So just as much women are chosen but they also have the power to chose the guy back so both have power in terms of whether a relationship happens

  • @EvakarenMuriithi
    @EvakarenMuriithi Рік тому +48

    Thats it's okay to still love them and let them go anyway. Not all endings have to be ugly.☺️☺️

  • @MagrethAkilah
    @MagrethAkilah Рік тому +45

    People have started asking me......why do you always smile like that on Wednesdays 😂😂😂😂 common it's my favorite day in the week 😂😂😂❤❤❤

  • @maureenwambui2992
    @maureenwambui2992 Рік тому +18

    Lydia!!! Ding! Ding! Ding!
    I'm with you on the LISTENING!!😮‍💨😮‍💨
    I'm listening a lot more in this season❤❤❤❤❤

  • @nyatichiomwenga2536
    @nyatichiomwenga2536 Рік тому +21

    Lyd's reaction to Murugi's ex beating up the sister😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @ValaxyRealities
    @ValaxyRealities Рік тому +7

    One of my ex's taught me that true love exists and the other taught me the importance of self love.

  • @anyangolovenah7703
    @anyangolovenah7703 Рік тому +11

    I really enjoyed the conversation. I hope we all find love in the right place.

  • @abigaelrotich9688
    @abigaelrotich9688 Рік тому +30

    When yall said that ppl dont need money to treat you well. . .so i learnt that lesson from my last ex. He spent a grand total of sh 150 on me in the whole 5 months that we were together. He was a resident gynacologist in a big regional hospital. I still feel my gut wrench when i remember how much i tolerated just to be with a doctor. I still havent forgiven myself😅

    • @Mercyree344
      @Mercyree344 Рік тому

      Wuehh😂😂😭😭😭😭😭. Am triggered oh Lord

    • @ingridnatalie3545
      @ingridnatalie3545 Рік тому +2

      Grand total 😆😆

    • @Silentcheerlady
      @Silentcheerlady Рік тому +1

      I'm learning to forgive myself too!!!! A pilot strung me along and all our dates were in my parking lot ati because he liked my estate. Ghaiiiiii. Once I asked if we could go on a proper date (he had said he loves me mara kadhaaaaa) he said sure and we never did!!

    • @perismkala4275
      @perismkala4275 Рік тому +2

      150 shillings 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤦 for 5 months

    • @ichooseviolence2532
      @ichooseviolence2532 9 місяців тому

      It seems you were poor yourself that's why you looking into men's pockets

  • @GambaWithJ
    @GambaWithJ Рік тому +6

    Commitment manifests when the other person's verbal words and actions are married

  • @catemashamemoments2590
    @catemashamemoments2590 Рік тому +6

    Peaceful love exist where you can be yourself 100%, good men exist supportive and secure breed

  • @shammahnzaana214
    @shammahnzaana214 Рік тому +30

    And congratulations on the pulse award 😭💕🤭

  • @hadassahwanjira
    @hadassahwanjira Рік тому +7

    i have listened to every episode, thank you for recognising us. WE LOVE YOU!

  • @gretelbexmulekye84
    @gretelbexmulekye84 Рік тому +1

    The most important thing I have learnt from TMI is that it can get better. And it does.
    Thank you.

  • @sophiekabiru8361
    @sophiekabiru8361 Рік тому +5

    and this episode is after the plus award ....and we did it 🎉🎉🎉🎉 ...am so proud that I voted 😊😊😊😊 congratulations again my people ❤❤❤

  • @shammahnzaana214
    @shammahnzaana214 Рік тому +9

    Welcome back Lyd 🥰

  • @catherinecheptirim5476
    @catherinecheptirim5476 Рік тому +2

    Complacency: That is the truth. This makes you brew so much toxicity in a relationship.

  • @hamelynmotika2506
    @hamelynmotika2506 Рік тому +2

    Now I'm subscribed to Tmi with all my accounts. Someone show me where VIP followers sit, please. Anyway, I love your show guys, you keep it real on so many levels. Zile kidogo I might not agree with, I let slide.

  • @joyceyugi9266
    @joyceyugi9266 Рік тому +6

    CONGRATULATIONS ON THE PULSE AWARDS 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤❤❤❤💯💯💯.
    Very well deserved

  • @Perfectly_Abby
    @Perfectly_Abby Рік тому +8

    You Ladies are Phenomenal.
    Your content is Top tier relatable, thank you for the work you put in ❤❤

  • @feinussayid2938
    @feinussayid2938 Рік тому +18

    My ex taught me I’m the problem 😂 you know how u think people need fixing Alafu u sit back and reflect and realise that’s how it’s suppose to be it’s only your reality is messed coz of your traumas 😂 I walked around with the victim mentality but I’m the problem. I have anger issues. I am avoidant. I give the silent treatment. I believe it’s my way or the high way. Basically I’m fucked up🙈 but Atleast I know now and is willing to work on them in shaa Allah

    • @edinahkendi9871
      @edinahkendi9871 Рік тому +1

      The accountability tho👏
      I wanna be you...being responsible for our actions

    • @Nass_612
      @Nass_612 Рік тому

      Me and you both😂

    • @rachealwambui3413
      @rachealwambui3413 Рік тому +2

      yes. I've been trying to heal my daddy issues and a toxic childhood. In as much as I think my ex hurt me , I also acknowledge I played a major role in our relationship ending. I'm willing to work on my victim mentality, anger issues and trust issues. I want to be better for myself and also for my next man/relationship

    • @feinussayid2938
      @feinussayid2938 Рік тому

      @@rachealwambui3413go gurl 🎉🎉🎉🎉👏🏼💗

  • @Jadena589
    @Jadena589 Рік тому +1

    This is definitely the best episode of TMI i have watched,,but i refuse to believe it's the best, because the best is yet to come!! Greaatt topiiicc. I have learned alloottt fr

  • @marciajames9434
    @marciajames9434 Рік тому +3

    You all scored A's on this one; when Lydia talk about familiarity and unable to recognize the red flags as a result was like several LIGHT BULBs went on....stay sweet ladies

  • @bernicefenton
    @bernicefenton Рік тому +9

    y'all are doing the lord's work at making the dating pool tolerable

  • @eldabettanabucha9130
    @eldabettanabucha9130 Рік тому +8

    Just learnt about you during the pulse award, and im so glad to be among the new subscribers ❤❤❤ this was enlightening

  • @gracenjeri1917
    @gracenjeri1917 Рік тому +13

    Wednesdays are for TMI!!❤

  • @paulinewambui1538
    @paulinewambui1538 Рік тому +7

    So much wisdom from these ladies.. every episode i learn something knowledge, TMI is therapy to me

  • @hopemor1720
    @hopemor1720 Рік тому +10

    Please tell me why I've been waiting since morning for TMI😂😂😂😂, and it was uploaded and I watched it an hour later?😢😢😢 Ugh... Let me tell you Sally Mae, my favorite day of the week ❤❤❤❤❤❤ TMI TMI TMI TMI🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

  • @marieesther9362
    @marieesther9362 Рік тому +1

    Definitely the best podcast have ever come across

  • @wanjiru_m
    @wanjiru_m Рік тому +6

    Now I'm in love with Lydia's first boyfriend..... I genuinely hope he is happy 😊😅

  • @mercykiaritha350
    @mercykiaritha350 Рік тому +5

    The way these two women school me 😢 this topic was right on the money.

  • @lzgaks7825
    @lzgaks7825 Рік тому +2

    What i learnt from my ex . Being told he need time to put his "house" in order so that he can commit to you fully is just a brutal way of keeping you there 😂😂😂😂.
    The truth is his other rship has picked up and thriving .

  • @rachealmburu11
    @rachealmburu11 Рік тому +11

    Heeeh....my ladies, I have other core values but height is definitely one of them. I'm like 5'6 and I have an ex who was waaay shorter than I. He had both good and bad sides but the one that I didn't like the most was the attention seeking. He kept looking for that recognition in a crowd. Sorry to say but short man syndrome is a thing. Especially for men. They tend to over compensate for their height.

  • @QueenB376
    @QueenB376 Рік тому +2

    My ex taught me to put myself first regardless of the situation (AKA being selfish).

  • @estherkavindu
    @estherkavindu Рік тому +1

    I agree with that dating app situation. I like selecting what I want. Not waiting for someone to choose me

  • @enabennett3129
    @enabennett3129 Рік тому +12

    Everytime I listen to your episodes I’m reminded that I should start therapy😂

    • @Mercyree344
      @Mercyree344 Рік тому

      Yoh sis. Me toooo😂🥺🥺. I’m triggered

  • @nyamburakimani3726
    @nyamburakimani3726 Рік тому +1

    I have watched all episodes apart from 2 that was to triggering .you add value......I have learnt ,I have enjoyed and that's why

  • @elizabethwairimu9050
    @elizabethwairimu9050 Рік тому

    I extend a huge amount of grace to where people are placed,,,, I love this girl❤

  • @stacykaykenya343
    @stacykaykenya343 Рік тому +1

    Am that person who has watched all episodes of tmi and I go back to rewatch

  • @letstalkkenya2
    @letstalkkenya2 Рік тому +5

    Lydia's wisdom...❤❤❤

  • @itslovelytee2252
    @itslovelytee2252 Рік тому +4

    Not it’s a mass order going to every office across Nairobi 💀🤣🤣🤣

  • @genylachieng9856
    @genylachieng9856 Рік тому +4

    I'm that person who has listened/watched every single episode. I LOVE YOU GUYS keep going hard🎉❤

  • @ivonna7916
    @ivonna7916 Рік тому +2

    Ati tulisema we are commenting after watching🥲....... I will tho, in the meeantiimee🤣

  • @graciellahnjeri3368
    @graciellahnjeri3368 Рік тому +4

    You girls really make me happy. I just love you.
    ❤❤❤❤

  • @GambaWithJ
    @GambaWithJ Рік тому +2

    Love can absolutely be peaceful

  • @janetokumu4904
    @janetokumu4904 Рік тому +3

    Weh,this r/ship field has a loooot to learn and unlearn

  • @mirriammaina6860
    @mirriammaina6860 Рік тому +3

    My ex taught me that a man is who he is, not who I believe he is.

  • @bevstella
    @bevstella Рік тому +1

    Not me liking the video even before the intro, you guys😍

  • @mahorotatianah8186
    @mahorotatianah8186 Рік тому +19

    Not me tapping the like button even before I dig into the topic. Coz am 💯 sure it's a bomb. We learn to relearn those people whom we used to know 😂😂

    • @tmipodcastke
      @tmipodcastke  Рік тому +1

      😂😂😂😂

    • @mahorotatianah8186
      @mahorotatianah8186 Рік тому +2

      @@tmipodcastke anyways the lessons come only after we’ve left. So not settling for less(less care,love,empathy,less MONEY!!)will forever be my standing point.

  • @thisiswanjikusworld
    @thisiswanjikusworld Рік тому

    I learnt that love is being yourself in the relationship.

  • @albertinaallan5751
    @albertinaallan5751 Рік тому +4

    Its definitely tmiiiiiiiii🎉🎉❤❤

  • @beloncekamz2821
    @beloncekamz2821 Рік тому +1

    Karibu nyumbani Lyd☺️. It's Definitely TMIIII 🎶keep it 💯. If only i could subscribe again every episode, I would😎. Quality stuff✨.
    #WCW ❤❤

  • @EstherMuthamba
    @EstherMuthamba Рік тому +4

    Finalllyyy...its Wednesday😂❤❤my favourite day of the week because of you two😅

  • @dorothykanana2623
    @dorothykanana2623 Рік тому +3

    not 'Lady Danbury me' Lydia😂😂

  • @wendywairimu2060
    @wendywairimu2060 Рік тому +2

    It's the daddy wounds for meeeeee!!!

  • @GloryWawirak
    @GloryWawirak Рік тому +2

    Eeeeiii....y'all invested in SHOUTING in this episode😂

  • @katheywangui6813
    @katheywangui6813 Рік тому +4

    We love it here and we love you both 🤗

  • @kmusyokaruth3658
    @kmusyokaruth3658 Рік тому +3

    😂😂😂 aky lets ask about the relationship status two months in atleast. I once dated a man i previous knew. After 3 months i asked about our relationship..😢😢 weuh let me tell you maina. Am single 😅😭 kumbe i was dating myself with hopes

  • @janeritahbabirye1881
    @janeritahbabirye1881 Рік тому +1

    Girls winning 🎉🎉🎉
    Hi Lyd, Jen's already subscribed 2 years ago😅

  • @annamariakemigabo9875
    @annamariakemigabo9875 Рік тому

    Thank you guys for this show. For sharing. So grateful for this show. Coz I have learnt a lot on this episode.🤗👏👏

  • @cyndigomboya4230
    @cyndigomboya4230 Рік тому +6

    Always enjoying the show, good job girls ❤❤

  • @aumalucy1094
    @aumalucy1094 Рік тому +2

    Lydia's first reason is 💯

  • @paprika7930
    @paprika7930 Рік тому +2

    @57:25 When Lyd said "Take my mic, take my mic" 😪😩

  • @phoebewasike5397
    @phoebewasike5397 Рік тому

    Am always eager to learn from this podcast. You ladies are amazing and helping us alot

  • @janechukwu6682
    @janechukwu6682 Рік тому +4

    Why do y’all keep saying ‘Jane’ ? 😂 I love TMI! ❤ No cap!!!

  • @lilianakeyo3976
    @lilianakeyo3976 Рік тому +1

    Murugi being real ❤

  • @Sylviawairimu299
    @Sylviawairimu299 2 місяці тому

    I was once with a man for more than two years then he introduced me to his sister as a colleague ,, not even a friend!!!! always confirm please

  • @faithawino
    @faithawino Рік тому +1

    Oh Lydia 😅😅😅😅 ati "me nilianza tu kuitwa Mamaa" 🤦‍♀️🤣

  • @zwad3423
    @zwad3423 Рік тому +1

    Insightful conversation, I love it

  • @MeloXtie
    @MeloXtie Рік тому +2

    What a conversation, great❤

  • @Lucy......718
    @Lucy......718 Рік тому +5

    Make sure you ask the question of what are we before you do relationship stuff. Not after he has met your friends and slept with you. If it's for sex just say it's just that 😂😂

  • @StellaNyambura-qi2hb
    @StellaNyambura-qi2hb Рік тому +6

    Was just waiting 😍I love Wednesdays😍

  • @kemuntonyamwange
    @kemuntonyamwange Рік тому +2

    very educative. i am awed

  • @unapologeticallymega9936
    @unapologeticallymega9936 Рік тому +3

    Notification gang🎉🎉🎉love you gals❤

  • @gakuru_wambui
    @gakuru_wambui Рік тому +1

    What I learned from my ex that ended really badly, is that they don't have to give me closure..but this i realized much much later after I've healed myself..I really wanted to see the person and ask questions..
    Could it have made any difference,I don't think so....I had to unlearn that.

  • @kmusyokaruth3658
    @kmusyokaruth3658 Рік тому +2

    About online dating and dating apps... I'll first oops,!! Actually Lydia and murugi can do the bad and the angly about it. I know some people have met through dating online which is incredible but ...whats the percentage i guess less than 10% that lead to meaningful connections. Having conversations online is great but once you meet them is a flip 🙃 an opposite of the conversations. After several times trying to figure out online dating this is what I learnt.(ever been on bumble for sometime).Better date someone youve met one on one. Anyone can be anything online and on keyboard...untill you meet the toxic unhealed humans coming to seek self-gratification on online apps..
    A crazy world in this dating streets....

  • @ShilawNdunu-pj5rw
    @ShilawNdunu-pj5rw Рік тому

    Everytime I listen I feel alot wise and so much better and so intentional about my feeling and thing I do and that that mh feeling are validated

  • @carletteharriet9684
    @carletteharriet9684 Рік тому +3

    My ex taught me no matter the acrobatics you do in bed if you aint the one he wants you aint, and no matter how beautiful you are you cannot compete when the woman he wants. Cheers to lessons❤️❤️❤️

    • @rebeccawambugu4035
      @rebeccawambugu4035 Рік тому +1

      You can be the one he wants and he will still cheat 😂😂😂😂 lack of sexual discipline is a thiiiiiing🥲

  • @rosemarychege4992
    @rosemarychege4992 Рік тому +1

    This was so educative and amazing❤

  • @ShilawNdunu-pj5rw
    @ShilawNdunu-pj5rw Рік тому +1

    I love u guys # big sisters for life

  • @salomeshiran1660
    @salomeshiran1660 Рік тому

    Never ask a man what are we
    Thank you and welcome

  • @Tessthebaddie
    @Tessthebaddie Рік тому +2

    Wildebeests were just migrating then boom 😂😂😂😂

  • @susanwaweru8093
    @susanwaweru8093 Рік тому +1

    The last guy I dated tried so much trying to change my dressing code and at some point I found myself giving out them outfitse.....until I was like dude go date that person you're trying to make me be I just wasn't his rib😊😊

    • @ichooseviolence2532
      @ichooseviolence2532 9 місяців тому

      Seems like you wore ratchet clothes exposing yourself so much that's why he had to step in???

  • @preemuthoni5373
    @preemuthoni5373 Рік тому +1

    It's definitely TMI❤

  • @dreamer27-h8k
    @dreamer27-h8k Рік тому +2

    But why are we having 4 or 5 intimate relationships 😅 ? Heal a little 😊

  • @vivjerop
    @vivjerop Рік тому +1

    What I've been waiting for 😍😅