As someone who has a lot of experience, It only works for so long until they ask me the same questions. It's just one of the habits of interesting, like icing on a cake.
I agree with some aspects in this video but definitely not all. When I’ve just gotten to know someone, I wouldn’t want them to ask me questions such as what I’m thinking. Tbh, that would just freak me out because I don’t wanna tell some stranger that I just met what I think. We shouldn’t expect to dive into super deep conversations as soon as meeting people because most people won’t open up that quickly. For many, it needs a certain level of trust to have deep, interesting conversations. In my opinion, it’s much better to ask about people’s favorite things because this is something that they love and are passionate about so they will obviously like to talk about it. Ask them what they like about it so much or what they don’t like about something. Just in general, ask for reasons, but don’t be nosy. I found out it can really make for interesting conversations, especially when it’s something you don’t know much about or are opposed to (but don’t judge them then, try to understand them) because then you get to know new viewpoints and expand your own horizon. I also only agree partly about doing things not everybody does. Of course it can be really fun and interesting to tell someone about something you’ve done, eaten or read but only if the other person can relate to it in some way, so you can have a conversation. Conversations, however, won’t work out if it’s something so different that the other person can’t relate to it and won’t know what to say about it. Then it’s in my opinion better to talk about the new bestseller that everybody’s read. I think most important is just to be open to and interested in new things, new experiences and new people. :)
All I can say is THANK YOU Vanee. I have virtually all your videos. It helps me and I love going back to them over and over. I know I'm a work in progress and I believe I can be better, I will be better.
5:27 starts Ask someone about the weirdest thing they have ever eaten? What's on their bucket list? What/which movie changed their life ?? New skill they are learning? About their personal passion project??
I use alot of these videos in a high school social skills class I teach and I have loved them. The students seem to like them as well and I have defiantly noticed a few who really try to change using skills and steps given.
Same! When she said boring people eat at the same place, go on the same vacations, watch the same shows… haha that is me to a T. I don’t think that’s wrong. I like what I like. I do interesting things too though. We wouldn’t be here if we were really “uninteresting”.
Vanessa I'm reading your book. I've taken your quizzes, and I watch every UA-cam video I can find. I'm feeling so much better. I know what to do with my body. I feel more confident. I know it takes practice but I'm so thankful for your work...Thank you. Thank you Thank you! 😘
Fact is most people don't think their interesting when they are. The willingness to engage in conversation is key. Don't just answer questions, have some to ask. My 2cents.
you have to be what women want and find interesting. Thats it. It doesnt matter if youre doing what you love because if she doesnt find it interesting she will find you boring.
Hi, Vanessa , i thank god that i got you in start of 2021, i am very much impressed by your thoughts and movements. reayou are doing great things to pump up people life, your all videos are very interesting and see to understand, deep and encouraging , adv. sanjiv deshle , pune city, india
Watching the same Netflix shows can be a good way of finding similarity with people for bonding but that's not enough to be interesting past the bonding phase :)
Great video and I have to say I do work at this. I am retired and there is nothing more boring than being with retired people who only talk about their ailments, doctor appointments and meds. I am currently learning how to speak French because I always wanted to learn that. I workout 5 days a week, I facilitate a Bible study and I'm reading Captivate! Psalm 92 has something to say on this subject: they will remain vital and green and still bear fruit in old age. I live by that.
That's a good idea but I did that for college and I worked in an environment where almost everyone was Muslim so I do know a bit about other religions.
Starting from point 2:29, did you consider, introversion and how fast a person thinks when referring to "lazy in conversation"? Also...if that "lazy uninteresting" person is interested on having a conversation?
This was really good with practical ideas and tips. "Fight the laziness." I feel like tatooing that on my body to remind myself that although my mind wants the best for me, laziness is my worst enemy! I will not let laziness win now that I can identify it! She has a good voice, tone and pace too. Pleasant and easy to listen too. Not distracting.
Wow. I was interested bettering myself on one or two flaws but after watching your video I realize I am guilty on every count and feel so much worse. Thanks.
Hey Vanessa! I love your videos, and I already watched your course on LinkedIn. I'm curious to know what are the books, documentaries, podcasts, or anything that changed your thinking and, ultimately, your life. How do you learn? What advice you give to people seeking personality development? What skills you advice them to learn? Now I know how to be interesting; how can I be a person who wants to be authentic, self-aware, confident, and proud?
YOUR channel is also interesting.. I have seen your interviews with Tom beilyue.. impact theory and thought ur interesting that's y I subcribed ur channel.. happy Friday Vaneesa
Recommendation algorithms on social platforms (UA-cam, TikTok, ...) are making us less interesting as they only recommend things that align with our views/browsing histories. Have to turn on incognito mode to see some "interesting" new ideas
People are more consumed in their past and live and repeat their trauma events, I have not so great past either, but I noticed that no one will be having a great time listening to my sob story and traumatic past at least not early on in a friendship or a relationship. So better not start with that, in the end no matter how much ppl care they will find themselves walking away from someone who complains about their life, no one wants to hang out around those who complain all the time whether u like it or not.
The whole idea of trying to be interesting has a flaw. It is as if one wants to impress. That philosophy is bound to fail because it puts focus on wrong things. Instead what you really want to do is 1. Understand your audience (*what do they want to do* in given context, at party they want to relax, chill and have fun. In a meeting at office they want to solve a problem, in manager and your meeting manager wants to improve your performance, in networking they want to create new connections and have fun) 2. Understand your context (are you talking at office meeting, at home party) 3. Then according to audience and context, just talk and adapt your message. Experiment a lot and reflect what works. Typically shorter messages work better than long winded ones, etc
I am a blue collar person that mostly only deal with other blue collar people and this is a guide on how to make those people not want to be around you. Most people. Interesting people are interesting to all people and not just other interesting people
I agree with MOST of what you've talked about in this video, I did have a bit of a problem with how you framed it though. I came to this video because I'm dealing with social anxiety and depression and being called lazy really didn't hit me in the right way. Aside from that this is a great video and it actually has a lot of good tips, but being called lazy right at the start was a bit of a low blow. lol
Not going to lie, I kinda giggled when you had the little conversation bubble that said, "I'm strange!". HAHA!!! All jokes aside though, those were some great tips. I often struggle with what to say next after someone tells me something. Like I know I need to acknowledge what they said and then respond approproately, but I often struggle with how to respond. Do you have any videos to help with that?
Great question, Katie! You may find these articles on our website helpful: www.scienceofpeople.com/what-to-say/ www.scienceofpeople.com/have-hold-conversation/
Something equally important, don't be afraid to share interesting things about you! You may be the most interesting person ever, but if you don't let people know, they will think you're boring.
Thank you so much!!!! Can you tell about depression and how to fight it...seeing these videos I truely feel very confident and happy. And you are the most interesting person I can see right now..
Hi Vanessa, I am afraid that I sound so curious, I get carried away and scare people. I'm a female engenieer so typically not a boring combination. I have to find a balance in conversation. I sometimes ask myself: do I wanna know? I realy need to read your book. Cheers from Amsterdam
Your fear of being uninteresting makes you uninteresting. Every interaction becomes an apology. Your fear is stopping you from being interesting. Uninteresting people are lazy, they dont do interesting things, they expect you to do all the talking. 1. Stop doin boring uninteresting things. Dont do what everyone else is doing, dont watch what everyone else is doing. Create a bucket list and pledge to do 1 interesting thing each month, achieve a big goal. Go to a workout class, restaurant or movie theater you've never been to. 2. Ask interesting questions. Ask someone about the weirdest thing theyve ever eaten, what's on their bucket list? What movie most changed your life? What new skill are you learning? Do you have a passion? 3. Consume interesting things. What u consume make you who you are. Food, media etc read and eat unpopular things. Read a news source that's the opposite from tour point of view. Find a new favourite columnist. 4. Ask people what they are considering. What do they think? What intrigues them? How do they learn? What are they learning? Learn interesting things about other people 5. Hang out with interesting people. Who is the most interesting person you know? Funniest? Intelligent? Well read? Well travelled? Go hand out with them! Laziness is the enemy of interesting
That's extremely right all these ways it works I think when I'm gonna start to be like that I will find my self in another world, but the good one is to surround yourself with interesting people and change the thing you did usually than you can find out your self like them without feeling, keep up the good work.
Sometimes i feel that no one is really interesting but it's just a presentation, prefrence and attraction that makes it, or that person seem interesting. If everyone were interesting no one would be interesting. Right? Im trying to understand. I feel super unitresting but I've heard people talk about someone being intresting however i sat there and was like wow, none of that sounds interesting to me.
Learn how to be more interesting: www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-be-more-interesting/
Boring is not a personality. Boring is a set of bad habits. Vanessa summarized this well.
I may be boring to you but not to me and others. Who are you to decide that I'm boring? And who are you to say that my habits are bed ?
"To be interesting, be interested." Dale Carnegie
I love this
I needed that
@Karrie Dee I find that book is advocating being fake. Pretending and sucking up. Authenticity needs to be valued.
I love how to win friends & influence peeps. Suck a good book.
As someone who has a lot of experience, It only works for so long until they ask me the same questions. It's just one of the habits of interesting, like icing on a cake.
Interesting is absolutely equal self-improvement, exactly is when you work on yourself, your life and words become interesting!
I agree with some aspects in this video but definitely not all.
When I’ve just gotten to know someone, I wouldn’t want them to ask me questions such as what I’m thinking. Tbh, that would just freak me out because I don’t wanna tell some stranger that I just met what I think. We shouldn’t expect to dive into super deep conversations as soon as meeting people because most people won’t open up that quickly. For many, it needs a certain level of trust to have deep, interesting conversations. In my opinion, it’s much better to ask about people’s favorite things because this is something that they love and are passionate about so they will obviously like to talk about it. Ask them what they like about it so much or what they don’t like about something. Just in general, ask for reasons, but don’t be nosy. I found out it can really make for interesting conversations, especially when it’s something you don’t know much about or are opposed to (but don’t judge them then, try to understand them) because then you get to know new viewpoints and expand your own horizon.
I also only agree partly about doing things not everybody does. Of course it can be really fun and interesting to tell someone about something you’ve done, eaten or read but only if the other person can relate to it in some way, so you can have a conversation. Conversations, however, won’t work out if it’s something so different that the other person can’t relate to it and won’t know what to say about it. Then it’s in my opinion better to talk about the new bestseller that everybody’s read.
I think most important is just to be open to and interested in new things, new experiences and new people. :)
Alisa, four years ago you told the entire Internet how you thought.
@@peterjhartvideo just got it! 😅
All I can say is THANK YOU Vanee.
I have virtually all your videos.
It helps me and I love going back to them over and over.
I know I'm a work in progress and I believe I can be better, I will be better.
5:27 starts
Ask someone about the weirdest thing they have ever eaten?
What's on their bucket list?
What/which movie changed their life ??
New skill they are learning?
About their personal passion project??
I use alot of these videos in a high school social skills class I teach and I have loved them. The students seem to like them as well and I have defiantly noticed a few who really try to change using skills and steps given.
Oh that makes me so happy! Thank you for sharing my work with your students. ♥
I’ve been looking for videos about this topic, and none of them really helped me, but this one is actually really good!
The way she describes lazy people in a conversation, is a perfect description of myself sadly, lol know I know what I'm doing wrong thanks!
Same here bro ,you are not alone
Same! When she said boring people eat at the same place, go on the same vacations, watch the same shows… haha that is me to a T. I don’t think that’s wrong. I like what I like. I do interesting things too though. We wouldn’t be here if we were really “uninteresting”.
Vanessa I'm reading your book. I've taken your quizzes, and I watch every UA-cam video I can find. I'm feeling so much better. I know what to do with my body. I feel more confident. I know it takes practice but I'm so thankful for your work...Thank you. Thank you Thank you! 😘
Laziness is the enemy of interesting. Well said
Your tips actually do help me. Thank you a lot Vanessa
This is the best advice I have ever heard! Point blank! Thank you love. I love you because you hit great subjects.
Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed the video. Sending love! 🤗
Take a shot every time she says interesting.
That ought to make your night interesting 😶😂
I'd DIE
It’ll be your last night alive! 😂
Lol
Well, the title DOES say, " How to be more interesting." So........
I think that would make me the "most interesting man in the world"
Fact is most people don't think their interesting when they are. The willingness to engage in conversation is key. Don't just answer questions, have some to ask. My 2cents.
You're a GREAT inspirer, Vanessa! BIG THANKS!! :-)))
This is by far one of the most interesting videos I have ever seen. I am going to try this. Thanks V. 🤗
I always thought that if you want to be interesting, be interested.😘
that's a good tip
you have to be what women want and find interesting. Thats it. It doesnt matter if youre doing what you love because if she doesnt find it interesting she will find you boring.
I think a more effective and simple way to think about it is, "talk with the intention of having fun"
Feel called out, but that's why I'm here. Fitting all the boring categories and feel desperate to break out
Hi, Vanessa , i thank god that i got you in start of 2021, i am very much impressed by your thoughts and movements. reayou are doing great things to pump up people life, your all videos are very interesting and see to understand, deep and encouraging , adv. sanjiv deshle , pune city, india
Sometimes it's a challenge to be when you're dealing with depression or discouragement but I do like the idea and will try to keep my antennas up
I wish i could give this a 1000 likes, I love your work Vanessa!
Watching the same Netflix shows can be a good way of finding similarity with people for bonding but that's not enough to be interesting past the bonding phase :)
I just talk about the international banking conspiracy. It always gets people fired up.
Only for a one time conversation, in the end u won't be able to talk about it forever
Great video and I have to say I do work at this. I am retired and there is nothing more boring than being with retired people who only talk about their ailments, doctor appointments and meds. I am currently learning how to speak French because I always wanted to learn that. I workout 5 days a week, I facilitate a Bible study and I'm reading Captivate! Psalm 92 has something to say on this subject: they will remain vital and green and still bear fruit in old age. I live by that.
That's awesome! So inspiring :)
That's amazing.....
Try doing research and comparing different religions instead of going with the default
That's a good idea but I did that for college and I worked in an environment where almost everyone was Muslim so I do know a bit about other religions.
@Sharon worny
Ooh, I see...... wish you best of luck
I love it!
Vanessa is my favorite charisma teacher.
Great Video! Great ideas and with your bright energy! I hear it repeatedly!
2:00 The lazy law
5:25 Interesting Q’s
8:30 Who is the most interesting person you know?
You are an interested person. I like you and learns from you since Nov- 2020. 👍
Best wishes for your future endeavour.
Starting from point 2:29, did you consider, introversion and how fast a person thinks when referring to "lazy in conversation"? Also...if that "lazy uninteresting" person is interested on having a conversation?
You are interesting person! Enjoy learning from you Vanessa. Thank you
This was really good with practical ideas and tips. "Fight the laziness." I feel like tatooing that on my body to remind myself that although my mind wants the best for me, laziness is my worst enemy! I will not let laziness win now that I can identify it! She has a good voice, tone and pace too. Pleasant and easy to listen too. Not distracting.
Wow. I was interested bettering myself on one or two flaws but after watching your video I realize I am guilty on every count and feel so much worse. Thanks.
You are right mam. .....laziness is cause of being boring
Interesting 👍👍👍👍👍
Vanesaaaaa! Your teaching content and way of delivery are amazing. You are toppest in the top 1%. 💫💫💫💫
Very well put together speeches and videos. Great ideas and wonderful advice. Thank you!
You are so welcome! Thanks for watching ❤
Hey Vanessa! I love your videos, and I already watched your course on LinkedIn. I'm curious to know what are the books, documentaries, podcasts, or anything that changed your thinking and, ultimately, your life. How do you learn? What advice you give to people seeking personality development? What skills you advice them to learn?
Now I know how to be interesting; how can I be a person who wants to be authentic, self-aware, confident, and proud?
Grand slam home run, per usual. Gold. 👑
Your channel is so interesting and I'm glad I found you. Just subscribed!
YOUR channel is also interesting.. I have seen your interviews with Tom beilyue.. impact theory and thought ur interesting that's y I subcribed ur channel.. happy Friday Vaneesa
Do the axis need to be interchanged in "the curve of lazy and interesting" ?
Awesome, Vanessa! Thank you!
Recommendation algorithms on social platforms (UA-cam, TikTok, ...) are making us less interesting as they only recommend things that align with our views/browsing histories. Have to turn on incognito mode to see some "interesting" new ideas
People are more consumed in their past and live and repeat their trauma events, I have not so great past either, but I noticed that no one will be having a great time listening to my sob story and traumatic past at least not early on in a friendship or a relationship. So better not start with that, in the end no matter how much ppl care they will find themselves walking away from someone who complains about their life, no one wants to hang out around those who complain all the time whether u like it or not.
whoa...never thought of interesting and laziness being connected. but totally makes sense
Interest is something which give you the more power to do your best. Be interesting and become more powerful. Thanks
Yes, we must fight the laziness! In 2023, it is a common temptation for many of us.
Love it! And you are one of the most interesting on UA-cam! Thank you for you dedication! ❤️
i love this video. I really got so excited! Thank you!
Trista and I loved your recommendation on visiting the forest and Tea House while in Portland. Thanks Vanessa!
You are the most intresting person I know 😊
Just found your channel Vanessa. Great, easy to take steps here - and plus for the length of the videos! :)
The way Vanessa says interesting is the cutest thing! xD
Awesome, I love your videos Vanessa! Thank you so much!
The whole idea of trying to be interesting has a flaw. It is as if one wants to impress. That philosophy is bound to fail because it puts focus on wrong things.
Instead what you really want to do is
1. Understand your audience
(*what do they want to do* in given context, at party they want to relax, chill and have fun. In a meeting at office they want to solve a problem, in manager and your meeting manager wants to improve your performance, in networking they want to create new connections and have fun)
2. Understand your context
(are you talking at office meeting, at home party)
3. Then according to audience and context, just talk and adapt your message. Experiment a lot and reflect what works. Typically shorter messages work better than long winded ones, etc
Thanks Vanessa, I've just booked a hot air balloon ride when I go on holidays in August. That should be a great conversation piece.
That sounds like so much fun! I hope you have a great time =) it should be a great conversation piece!
Vanessa, do you have a book list that sparks ineterest in conversation? Much appreciated.
I think whatever is interesting to you falls under that list.
You are interesting, Vanessa. That's the reason why I watched your videos 🥰🥰🥰
🥰 thank you!
@@ScienceOfPeople Thank you too for sharing your expertise with everyone.
I am a blue collar person that mostly only deal with other blue collar people and this is a guide on how to make those people not want to be around you. Most people. Interesting people are interesting to all people and not just other interesting people
I agree with MOST of what you've talked about in this video, I did have a bit of a problem with how you framed it though.
I came to this video because I'm dealing with social anxiety and depression and being called lazy really didn't hit me in the right way.
Aside from that this is a great video and it actually has a lot of good tips, but being called lazy right at the start was a bit of a low blow. lol
Ahhh I feel your pain friend. I too suffer with quite bad Social Anxiety and Depression along with others.
Not going to lie, I kinda giggled when you had the little conversation bubble that said, "I'm strange!". HAHA!!! All jokes aside though, those were some great tips. I often struggle with what to say next after someone tells me something. Like I know I need to acknowledge what they said and then respond approproately, but I often struggle with how to respond. Do you have any videos to help with that?
Great question, Katie! You may find these articles on our website helpful:
www.scienceofpeople.com/what-to-say/
www.scienceofpeople.com/have-hold-conversation/
@@ScienceOfPeople Thank you so much!!!
I don't know why people put dislike for this interesting video .. I suspect you mentioned them in the video because they are lazy people hhhhhhhh
Me: What is your passion?
Them: Ummm I don't know for sure...
Good Topic Thanks
Glad you liked it!
I love this! Thank you!
i like the way how your content is so deep and so simple... :) thanks
U r interesting Venesa.. So nice explained. Thanks.
Something equally important, don't be afraid to share interesting things about you! You may be the most interesting person ever, but if you don't let people know, they will think you're boring.
So true!
Good.
Very interesting video Vanessa! I had to laugh watching it but it makes so much sense
Thank you so much!!!!
Can you tell about depression and how to fight it...seeing these videos I truely feel very confident and happy.
And you are the most interesting person I can see right now..
Amazing video, please keep it up...
Great video! Thanks! 👋👋
Excellent!!!!!
What about those that spot subliminal messages behind blockbuster movies?
Hi Vanessa, I am afraid that I sound so curious, I get carried away and scare people. I'm a female engenieer so typically not a boring combination. I have to find a balance in conversation. I sometimes ask myself: do I wanna know? I realy need to read your book. Cheers from Amsterdam
You are really very much changed in 4 years 🤗🤗
Your fear of being uninteresting makes you uninteresting. Every interaction becomes an apology.
Your fear is stopping you from being interesting.
Uninteresting people are lazy, they dont do interesting things, they expect you to do all the talking.
1. Stop doin boring uninteresting things. Dont do what everyone else is doing, dont watch what everyone else is doing. Create a bucket list and pledge to do 1 interesting thing each month, achieve a big goal. Go to a workout class, restaurant or movie theater you've never been to.
2. Ask interesting questions. Ask someone about the weirdest thing theyve ever eaten, what's on their bucket list? What movie most changed your life? What new skill are you learning? Do you have a passion?
3. Consume interesting things. What u consume make you who you are. Food, media etc read and eat unpopular things. Read a news source that's the opposite from tour point of view. Find a new favourite columnist.
4. Ask people what they are considering. What do they think? What intrigues them? How do they learn? What are they learning? Learn interesting things about other people
5. Hang out with interesting people. Who is the most interesting person you know? Funniest? Intelligent? Well read? Well travelled? Go hand out with them!
Laziness is the enemy of interesting
Good . Thanks
Brilliant, thank you Vanessa
I apply this advice. Now im become girl magnet! Tq coach. Mwahh
That's extremely right all these ways it works I think when I'm gonna start to be like that I will find my self in another world, but the good one is to surround yourself with interesting people and change the thing you did usually than you can find out your self like them without feeling,
keep up the good work.
You’re great at what you’re doing Vanessa! So interesting videos 😃👌
"Uninteresting people are lazy" -- Vennassa Van Edwardz
Its true that everyone Is interesting.
Very unique. Very interesting.
She called out a lotttt of people in this video, myself included
Very helpful! 🌹🌹
Great information and very interesting 😉
thank you for this knowledge
Hi Vanessa your videos is awesome. With videos learning english
This interestering person is very intersted in this interesting video from a very interesting person 👍
By this comment you are very interesting
You are so charismatic
There is a lot of powerfull practical knowledge i love it!
Polska Like
Sometimes i feel that no one is really interesting but it's just a presentation, prefrence and attraction that makes it, or that person seem interesting. If everyone were interesting no one would be interesting. Right? Im trying to understand. I feel super unitresting but I've heard people talk about someone being intresting however i sat there and was like wow, none of that sounds interesting to me.
Great video. Thank you.
Thank you mam, nice teaching...
Loved it !!
Awesome Vanessa 👏👏👏👏
Wow your cool! Thanks for getting us to be something because I was starting to get boring 😴
This is something interesting..thank u venessa 👍👍