Ohh! Love that: “don’t have to think about who I am all the time. I can just be…” yeah, I for sure felt/feel that. I’ve felt that growing up too. But I feel I’m still in it actually. Like I’m painfully ‘acting’ like Arvin instead of just beeeeeiiing Arvin. Thanks for sharing this video :)
I explain it like this. People have ways of life INFLICTED on to them by their parents, familes, schools, religons, governents, etc. This has cuased me so much anger, hatrd and resentment that i have flu like symptoms for years. Now i think i am on edge of enlightment because i see it's time for me to life MY live 100% the way i want too. As long as i don't break any laws or use physical violence it is my right to do as i please. I want the past 20 years back of being sick
I've felt this way for a long time and I have a physical representation of pain that after years of pain, I have realized that it is related to my nervous system being in constant state of fear and worry, and through learning about myself, I'm seeing what I've always felt since I was a child. Everything feels like I'm at the store. Everyone wants a piece of my money for materialistic joy, but no one wants me. Socializing is just that, a game. And, I've always been bad at it, because I don't try to play.
Thank you Julie for your affirming insight. I also experienced what you talk about as young person, feeling the things that occupy our time are artificial and often the opposite of my true desires. As I got older it was easy to become distracted with society, biology, and industry, and I doubled down on the quest to be like others, at the expense of the thing that was inside all the time. The world will still tell us that if we could just be like this, or like that, then people would approve of us. That people would like us if we are someone (or something) else becomes the subliminal message. What I found was that when everyone else approved I was left feeling very very unfulfilled. I can no longer carry that massive load of delusion. Thanks to people like you who have the courage to "be" I become able to also be brave.
Waking up is extremely challenging in this life and apparently I must have made a contract or choice at some point to do so. And yes, Ive felt this world to be illusory and/or something similar to the matrix as in the movie. Being human is so uncomfortable and way harder than I imagined it would be. And I havent played this human game well at all. Ive been neither mindfull nor skillful....to the point I feel theres not much left for me here and simply wish I could move on. Especially coming into what appears to be a very dark time on the planet. After much loss and trauma I kind of feel like Cipher (from the Matrix) was right.....ignorance is bliss. Sometimes I wish I could be one of these people that seem happy with the shallow, disconnected, and superficial society that is the mainstream. Seems an easier path.
"Every soul/self shall taste death. And verily you shall be satisfied with your wages on the Day of Standing. So whoever is removed from the Fire and entered into the Garden has become victorious. And what is the life of the world except the enjoyment of delusion." [Quran, 3:185]
This is a reality, and where artistic endeavour comes from, and the broader and deeper forms of philosophy, and religion even. There is never a finding of the 'authentic self' but just a keeping close to it and approaching it in a process where what you can perceive yourself to be, let alone think or say about yourself, is already gone before you even can start to focus on it. R.D. Laing might be the closest a writer has come to 'explaining' this inexplicable reality.
You're the one that's created the illusion. Nature is your design. It's so you can experience it and also see if you can see through it. You passed your own test.
I spent years giving my father everything he wanted and as soon as I cannot keep doing that, he makes me feel terrible for it. It's like I have to be there for others all the time, but if I need someone, then no one is there. You know life is just an illusion but it still hurts sometimes. In what reality would pain even exist? I don't understand.
How much conditioning do you feel is too much of a compromise for the inner freedom, for you? I know some sages say we may keep playing the part of the character even after the inner freedom is realized, but isn't it too strange? For whom does infinity put on clothing, obey traffic signs, and talk to their dream family, right? Do you still feel like your parent's child and play that part for their sake and, if so, are you really free?
Great questions. It i easy to get wrapped up in the head about all of these, but always bring it back to your actual experience in the now, and not what someone else said. It can never be understood by the mind and it must be ones own experience that is ultimate truth.
I agree with that, but that’s also why I’m asking not generally and universally “what should somebody do?“ But I’m actually asking specifically what your experience in your own life is like with work, family, relationships, etc. and awakening. Personally, that’s how I discern true teachers from folks who might still be integrating experiences acedemically. I look for examples of if awakening has been integrated into the life of the person who is claiming awakening. Personal examples of the serenity, joy, creativity, freedom, etc. Is the person actually living that way or are they just talking about it, know what I mean?
I’d like to clarify slightly… My premise would be that probably most people watching channels like these have already had some experience of their true/non-dual nature, and it seems as though the experience happens spontaneously anyway. I have found the greater challenge is to authentically live with a fully opened heart and quiet mind while still coexisting with people who have closed hearts, and busy minds. This is the feedback I’ve gotten from friends who have had awakenings as well… The true nature is fairly easy to briefly experience. What is hard for most people is all of the mental conditioning within relationships and daily life that pull the mind away from the authentic self
Julie , yes ,but as i told you before i am not yet awakened and during my few recent meditations i felt like i was able to sense a sense of iness with other thoughts , so i will see where this takes me ,and you ?
Ohh! Love that: “don’t have to think about who I am all the time. I can just be…” yeah, I for sure felt/feel that. I’ve felt that growing up too. But I feel I’m still in it actually. Like I’m painfully ‘acting’ like Arvin instead of just beeeeeiiing Arvin. Thanks for sharing this video :)
I explain it like this. People have ways of life INFLICTED on to them by their parents, familes, schools, religons, governents, etc. This has cuased me so much anger, hatrd and resentment that i have flu like symptoms for years. Now i think i am on edge of enlightment because i see it's time for me to life MY live 100% the way i want too. As long as i don't break any laws or use physical violence it is my right to do as i please. I want the past 20 years back of being sick
I've felt this way for a long time and I have a physical representation of pain that after years of pain, I have realized that it is related to my nervous system being in constant state of fear and worry, and through learning about myself, I'm seeing what I've always felt since I was a child. Everything feels like I'm at the store. Everyone wants a piece of my money for materialistic joy, but no one wants me. Socializing is just that, a game. And, I've always been bad at it, because I don't try to play.
Very relatable 🙏🏻
Same. I haven't wanted to play this human game for a long time now. Most of it just seems ugly and fake.
Thank you Julie for your affirming insight. I also experienced what you talk about as young person, feeling the things that occupy our time are artificial and often the opposite of my true desires. As I got older it was easy to become distracted with society, biology, and industry, and I doubled down on the quest to be like others, at the expense of the thing that was inside all the time.
The world will still tell us that if we could just be like this, or like that, then people would approve of us. That people would like us if we are someone (or something) else becomes the subliminal message. What I found was that when everyone else approved I was left feeling very very unfulfilled.
I can no longer carry that massive load of delusion. Thanks to people like you who have the courage to "be" I become able to also be brave.
I agree and I resonate with that too. The unfulfilling experience take many on a deeper path 🙏🏻
Waking up is extremely challenging in this life and apparently I must have made a contract or choice at some point to do so. And yes, Ive felt this world to be illusory and/or something similar to the matrix as in the movie. Being human is so uncomfortable and way harder than I imagined it would be. And I havent played this human game well at all. Ive been neither mindfull nor skillful....to the point I feel theres not much left for me here and simply wish I could move on. Especially coming into what appears to be a very dark time on the planet. After much loss and trauma I kind of feel like Cipher (from the Matrix) was right.....ignorance is bliss. Sometimes I wish I could be one of these people that seem happy with the shallow, disconnected, and superficial society that is the mainstream. Seems an easier path.
miss your UA-cam
"Every soul/self shall taste death. And verily you shall be satisfied with your wages on the Day of Standing. So whoever is removed from the Fire and entered into the Garden has become victorious. And what is the life of the world except the enjoyment of delusion."
[Quran, 3:185]
This is a reality, and where artistic endeavour comes from, and the broader and deeper forms of philosophy, and religion even. There is never a finding of the 'authentic self' but just a keeping close to it and approaching it in a process where what you can perceive yourself to be, let alone think or say about yourself, is already gone before you even can start to focus on it. R.D. Laing might be the closest a writer has come to 'explaining' this inexplicable reality.
Miss your videos 🥲🙏🏻
You're the one that's created the illusion. Nature is your design. It's so you can experience it and also see if you can see through it. You passed your own test.
I spent years giving my father everything he wanted and as soon as I cannot keep doing that, he makes me feel terrible for it. It's like I have to be there for others all the time, but if I need someone, then no one is there. You know life is just an illusion but it still hurts sometimes. In what reality would pain even exist? I don't understand.
When we heal these wounds (of which is the source of that pain) we attract different people 🙏🏻 the answer is in integration of pain
I feel that you'd be a great speaker of Norwegian.
Better than English 😄
@@theexpansivejourney3570 Åhå?!?!?! xD
How much conditioning do you feel is too much of a compromise for the inner freedom, for you? I know some sages say we may keep playing the part of the character even after the inner freedom is realized, but isn't it too strange? For whom does infinity put on clothing, obey traffic signs, and talk to their dream family, right? Do you still feel like your parent's child and play that part for their sake and, if so, are you really free?
Great questions. It i easy to get wrapped up in the head about all of these, but always bring it back to your actual experience in the now, and not what someone else said. It can never be understood by the mind and it must be ones own experience that is ultimate truth.
I agree with that, but that’s also why I’m asking not generally and universally “what should somebody do?“ But I’m actually asking specifically what your experience in your own life is like with work, family, relationships, etc. and awakening.
Personally, that’s how I discern true teachers from folks who might still be integrating experiences acedemically. I look for examples of if awakening has been integrated into the life of the person who is claiming awakening. Personal examples of the serenity, joy, creativity, freedom, etc. Is the person actually living that way or are they just talking about it, know what I mean?
I’d like to clarify slightly… My premise would be that probably most people watching channels like these have already had some experience of their true/non-dual nature, and it seems as though the experience happens spontaneously anyway. I have found the greater challenge is to authentically live with a fully opened heart and quiet mind while still coexisting with people who have closed hearts, and busy minds. This is the feedback I’ve gotten from friends who have had awakenings as well… The true nature is fairly easy to briefly experience. What is hard for most people is all of the mental conditioning within relationships and daily life that pull the mind away from the authentic self
So I would personally find it to be the most helpful to hear about how you’ve integrated the awaken state into daily life
Julie you feel like you are creator of the thoughts or thoughts come on their on ?
What is your experience? Do you consciously think?
Julie , yes ,but as i told you before i am not yet awakened and during my few recent meditations i felt like i was able to sense a sense of iness with other thoughts , so i will see where this takes me ,and you ?