I'm 100% sure that Nick, whilst alone at home, randomly, with no intention, no purpose, and no meaning speaks "Chinese" to himself without even thinking about it, as an autonomic function of his mind to stave off boredom, and maintain sanity throughout the day.
@@TomMyersComedy damn I wish I could the comment youre responding to, cause by itself it looks like you're calling Chinese people muslim, which is hilarious.
The mental image of what's being described combined with Nick's Chinese literally made me piss myself during my overnight shift yesterday, not a lot tho but a little
What makes this funny is that you don't think its Chinese teenagers doing that. You visualize its full grown Chinese men who are tourist wearing fanny packs that are throwing rocks at animals. Its hilarious, they most definitely are going to destroy us.
feel like its because you feel the whole way through that it was killed for some extremely petty reason but you never 100% know. Them stoning it to make it hop confirms our beliefs.
Nicks impression of what Chinese sounds like is really good. I don’t understand the language(s) but watching videos on Chinese news, that’s what it sounds like before we have some translator talking
It’s so bad but it was back in the late 90’s early 2000’s (not that it makes it any better) but whenever we would go to Chinese restaurants my dad would speak Chinese gibberish like Nick while we ate. After the food was brought so they couldn’t mess with it. God I miss my dad.
You know the funny thing about Chinese? I've lived in Hong Kong and no matter how much I heard it, it ALWAYS made me laugh 😂 Shit, I still laugh whenever I walk into my local Chinese restaurant
yeah i visited several of thes eprivate zoos in china over the years.. its insane.. you can by geese or ducks to feed to mangy bears and some are just concrete dust filled enclosures where theyll drive a sick looking donkey and then a dozen or so lions will eat it as people cheer and throw rocks.. haha its wild some animals are fake too .. fake snakes.. fake crocodiles ect.. where you walk past a pen and theres just fake animals there.. also you can buy and eat the animals .. there use to be a government zoo in beijing where you could pay hard currency to shoot at eat the animals back in the 1980s.. dont know when it closed down.. in north korea they still have one.. it was mostly stuff like badgers, foxes... dogs,, armadillo.. wild cats.. ect but i guess if you pay more you could have a bitter animal.. also in many zoos ive see bear bile and other stuff sold .. stuff like fox testicles and stuff..
Lol they threw rocks at it to make it hop, reminds me of an Ali G show bit were borat says something like “in my country we have a show where we get dog and cat and we make the floor hot so they jump” lmao 🤣 funniest shit Edit: found the video go to 45 seconds for the bit I referred to, but holy shit the whole videos funny ua-cam.com/video/iZ6vXq0Btbs/v-deo.html
If you're ever in the San Francisco area, swing by the Wing Kong Exchange in Chinatown; we'll arrange for a free tour for you. ....just ask for Miao Yin.
This reminds me of a story I heard recently where people on a beach in Texas harassed a beached dolphin and took pictures sitting on top of it rather than helping it get back out to water. They literally stressed it to death. 🤦♂️ People are so messed up.
I remember hearing that Nick knew Mandarin, havent heard him do it and mainly just never been able to get any of that info 100% confirmed, so I thought he was really speaking chinese.
Nick should read these 4 shortt stories Stephen King wrote under a fake name. There's one called 'the long walk' that's great. I think. and the other 3 are great too. but fucked up
What happens at the end of The Long Walk? Because I’m gonna be real with you guys, there’s no possible way I’ll remember to go read that m. Even if I somehow manage to get myself to want to read. But I would like to know why the ending is so insane.
Nick is speaking actual Chinese, sending out socialist codes to some key listeners
yeah well at least I am GAY tho am eye ryteee boyzee;)
"key ristener"
Indeed!
ACtivatu de sreeper cerrs
Gay sleeper agents
Shout outs to that kangaroo that chose to die instead of entertain Chinese assholes
Mad respect
It took the rocks and hit himself harder with em
im fucking crying dude
This is the funniest thing that I can never tell anyone.
There is a plethora of cum town content that I love but can never show it to any of my friends/family.
Why not
*Throws Rock 👲 🪨 🦘"You hop! You hop now!"
I tell this to people al the time. Stop being a pussy, be gay like the rest of us
I was excited to tell someone about this and then I couldn't think of anyone who wouldn't find this horrifying or sad lol.
Silver lining! The kangaroo no longer has to live in China!
Why did I assume they were tourists
-500 social credit score for this comment
🤣
They did say tourists.. So who knows
China rocks
I'm 100% sure that Nick, whilst alone at home, randomly, with no intention, no purpose, and no meaning speaks "Chinese" to himself without even thinking about it, as an autonomic function of his mind to stave off boredom, and maintain sanity throughout the day.
Bot stav and adam are simply parts of nicks imagination
Then the intent and purpose would be to stave off boredom and maintain sanity throughout the day.
Doesn’t everyone?
"maintain sanity" don't know about that...
Oh man he's just like me
Chinese people rock dude
no they rocked a kangaroo, get your story straight
@@noellesears10 that poor kangaroo got stoned to death yet wasnt even prostitute! Not a sin!
@@IGotYourBackBROTHER kangaroos are haram
@@TomMyersComedy damn I wish I could the comment youre responding to, cause by itself it looks like you're calling Chinese people muslim, which is hilarious.
@@TheTGOAC YEAH OK
*"WHY YOU NO HOP?!"*
Y U NO CHINEE?!
i was eating and immediately spat out my food when nick started impersonating a Chinese person stoning a kangaroo to death
Same I was trying to take a dab and blew water through my rig
Disgusting redditor
Same
SAME
We need a mashup of all of Nick's fake Chinese.
@@abberss fun fact: nope.
A mod for Jade Empire that replaces all of the voiced dialogue with Nick Mullen speaking fake Chinese :P
I wish my Chinese gibberish was half as good as Nick's
The mental image of what's being described combined with Nick's Chinese literally made me piss myself during my overnight shift yesterday, not a lot tho but a little
adam was scared of the frog cause he's a bug
😆
Kangaroos killed after visitors lob rocks, trying to make the kangaroo hop…
*insane Stav laughter*
That’s one of the best stav laughs
Nick's Chinese sounds like nothing but it really could be a dialect in some small Guangdong fishing village.
Fluent 潮汕话
Its sounds like Cantonese. So yeah, Guangdong fishing village sounds accurate
The "rottery " killed me
I'd like to think when that poor kangaroo died, nick was there in spirit.
That would be beautiful if true
Saying the N word
Laughing his ass off?
He was there dressed as Raiden with a Fu Manchu mustache, and he threw the first stone.
My friend worked at an animal park and he said the Chinese tourists squeezed a giny pig until it's guts came out.
what the fuck?!
@@pgmlivegameur Chinese people
I'm gonna give your comment a thumbs up even though your spelling of guinea pig is disgusting because the story is so good.
Did they eat it?
@@maxdurk4624 thank you sir
What makes this funny is that you don't think its Chinese teenagers doing that. You visualize its full grown Chinese men who are tourist wearing fanny packs that are throwing rocks at animals. Its hilarious, they most definitely are going to destroy us.
Holy shit the articles even more fucked
After they removed the rocks from around the exhibit people started bringing them in from elsewhere
>stones a kangaroo to death
BING CHILLING!
The Pelt and Reload Initiative
I work with a Chinese guy and he opens every sentence with “oohhh hahah ah”
You know they ate it after
Lmfao this got me good. Nice one my gay friend
Aussies do it too. Apparently it's pretty good
@@glurganergc4856 obviously they do. I’ve tried it too and it’s quite good. The joke is about the Chinese eating anything, the kangaroo is irrelevant
@@glurganergc4856 It's alright, practically identical to lean beef.
@@kermdeezy5330 Kangaroo meat is too close to real food. They probably left the kangaroo and just ate the Joey foetuses that were in its pouch.
My ex girlfriend was a militant vegan which is very annoying but the upshot was she absolutely hated Chinee
0:47 i cant even explain why what adam adds to the story makes it so much fucking funnier here. The kangaroo died by stoning instead of hopping away 😂
Boldly refusing the Bugmans demands to hop
feel like its because you feel the whole way through that it was killed for some extremely petty reason but you never 100% know. Them stoning it to make it hop confirms our beliefs.
@@I-Am-He. HEY! The only bugman here is Adam
Funniest part about this fucking video is that the UA-cam "heat map" spikes every time Nick starts speaking Mandarin.
There is a zero percent chance they didn’t eat the kangaroo after
Nick doesn't bust out laughing often, but you can tell he's going to as soon as Stav starts his story with "Chinese zoo"
It’s terrible that the hardest i laughed was when nick casually dropped “the rottery”
Hearing stories like this keeps my racism going.
Nicks impression of what Chinese sounds like is really good. I don’t understand the language(s) but watching videos on Chinese news, that’s what it sounds like before we have some translator talking
He lived with a Chinese family for 3 years
ho ho
HO HO
@Ben Garrison big fan of your work, Ben.
@@ScipioWasHerehe also learned mandarin for like a year im pretty sure
It’s so bad but it was back in the late 90’s early 2000’s (not that it makes it any better) but whenever we would go to Chinese restaurants my dad would speak Chinese gibberish like Nick while we ate. After the food was brought so they couldn’t mess with it. God I miss my dad.
Awesome.
@@bengarrison7780 thanks bro! Hahahahah
This is fuckin hilarious. I watched this on vacation in upstate New York and almost died laughing in the woods.
Nick speaking "Chinese" kills me.
The kangaroo should have strived to have a higher social credit score, no pitty from me, bing chilling
You know the funny thing about Chinese? I've lived in Hong Kong and no matter how much I heard it, it ALWAYS made me laugh 😂 Shit, I still laugh whenever I walk into my local Chinese restaurant
It's weird how Nick makes fun of Chinese people when pelting a kangaroo to death totally the sort of thing he'd love to see.
China sucks
Nick would unashamedly stone a Kangaroo to death and then take lead on the "we wanted to see it hop" angle when the cops show up
They do that in zoos for real. It’s really strange and upsetting.
upsetting for the animals
@@bahshas yeah because it doesnt work so they dont see anything cool and thats probably very disheartening.
Lmfao
yeah i visited several of thes eprivate zoos in china over the years.. its insane.. you can by geese or ducks to feed to mangy bears and some are just concrete dust filled enclosures where theyll drive a sick looking donkey and then a dozen or so lions will eat it as people cheer and throw rocks.. haha its wild some animals are fake too .. fake snakes.. fake crocodiles ect.. where you walk past a pen and theres just fake animals there.. also you can buy and eat the animals .. there use to be a government zoo in beijing where you could pay hard currency to shoot at eat the animals back in the 1980s.. dont know when it closed down.. in north korea they still have one.. it was mostly stuff like badgers, foxes... dogs,, armadillo.. wild cats.. ect but i guess if you pay more you could have a bitter animal.. also in many zoos ive see bear bile and other stuff sold .. stuff like fox testicles and stuff..
@@manchagojohnsonmanchago6367 hell yeah man
Xiangaroo
Pokémon Yellow told the truth all those years ago, you get to throw rocks in the safari zone
Nick is fluent in Mandarin, it's mind blowing.
I continue to watch this every time youtube reccomends it to me
Oh shit, it's exactly what I thought.
I love my best friends, dude.
I’ve listened to this every single day for the last 6-ish months
you missed the part where nick says throwing rocks at kangaroos should be an olympic event.
In 20 years time, we’ll all be the kangaroo
I wouldve KILLED to have been at that zoo 😂
I just need a 10 hour compilation of these guys talking about China.
Lol they threw rocks at it to make it hop, reminds me of an Ali G show bit were borat says something like “in my country we have a show where we get dog and cat and we make the floor hot so they jump” lmao 🤣 funniest shit
Edit: found the video go to 45 seconds for the bit I referred to, but holy shit the whole videos funny
ua-cam.com/video/iZ6vXq0Btbs/v-deo.html
What they don't tell you is that they served the kangaroo to the guests for lunch
Nick actually knows Chinese unlike Rosie O'Donnell
If you're ever in the San Francisco area, swing by the Wing Kong Exchange in Chinatown; we'll arrange for a free tour for you.
....just ask for Miao Yin.
It’s Miller time
It’s all in the reflexes.
@@Plazmalock
lol, It's a good knife. Goodbye, Mr. Burton.
ooh mirter lo pan nice to see you here
I live in SF, can I get a paid tour of this opium den/kangaroo coconut stall or whatever?
This clip came into my mind randomly and I burst out laughing in public and couldn't explain it to ANYONE because they'd think I was insane.
*in chinese voice* "Moll rike 5 am!"
“The rottery” slipped in there undetected
First gay here
But not gay actor Michael Douglas unfortunately.
Stav stepped on that punchline so fucking hard
That short story was quite interesting. I remember reading it, because we had to, probably in my early teens.
of course stav doesn't know what the doppler effect is
The start of this video makes me laugh hard every time.
I feel like Nick is half remembering “The ones that walk away from Omelas”
Similar story
That kangaroo probably said something racist.
Cafeteria probably cooked it
Cafeteria
Non-zero chance.
This reminds me of a story I heard recently where people on a beach in Texas harassed a beached dolphin and took pictures sitting on top of it rather than helping it get back out to water. They literally stressed it to death. 🤦♂️ People are so messed up.
so have they talked about the fatter uglier version of stav in Jackass 4?
Hey he's just fatter.
Amazed Adam didn’t chime in with a Shirley Jackson tidbit
The kangaroo should have strived to live
0:54 is one of my favorite stav laughs
Stav set up Nick like the boys in the wire
Probably ate that poor roo too
kangaroo is delicious
How is that worse? God says to eat everything you kill
The Safari zone is real.
Nick “Mike Mussina” Mullen
You mean a bunch of animals stoned a kangaroo to death.
CT Golden moment
Poor roo :(
“The Chinese are gonna fuck us up, dude”
I can only hope one day I'll speak mandarin fluently like Nick
There is a zero percent chance they didn't eat that kangaroo
Told my barber about TAFS and she said that she'd heard of it before. No you haven't.
Fattest Cities tour is just a tour of the south…
"The rottery obviously"
Rotery
Hell yeah dude
Bro I was loading the bowl at the start of the video then 0:50 happens mid bong rip holy shit that killed me
bugmen
Yeah I was forced to read that story and forced to watch the movie 😭😭
I'm Asian and I approve this message
Need to toss those animals in cages.
I remember hearing that Nick knew Mandarin, havent heard him do it and mainly just never been able to get any of that info 100% confirmed, so I thought he was really speaking chinese.
Insectoid sub humans
Like Adam?
"We not monkeys!".. stones animal to death in a zoo. I hate humans.
New bit idea: cut off all of Adams appendages with a saw then harvest and sell his organs to the Chinese.
Nick should read these 4 shortt stories Stephen King wrote under a fake name. There's one called 'the long walk' that's great. I think. and the other 3 are great too. but fucked up
Have you read Goosebumps??? Some are ok, some are super fucked.
the long walk rocks, the ending is insane
Are you being real. I would read this if true. It better not be some troll, like gay porn.
What happens at the end of The Long Walk? Because I’m gonna be real with you guys, there’s no possible way I’ll remember to go read that m. Even if I somehow manage to get myself to want to read. But I would like to know why the ending is so insane.
@@-Twotonepony- The main character loses his mind at the end, so when he reaches the finish line he just has a thousand island stare and keeps walking
It should be legal to be able to club the Chinese
wtf
Just do it they won't see it coming anyway
My favorite gibberish is the almost Chinese kind
Not all racism is irrational
Racism is irrational. Killing a kangaroo with rocks is irrational. Commenting on UA-cam is irrational. We are all irrational!!!!!!!!!!!!!