Cristela Alonzo - Barely Catholic

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  • Опубліковано 30 гру 2018
  • Cristela Alonzo on being BARELY Catholic. Cristela Alonzo stand up from the Just For Laughs Festival in 2016. Subscribe: bit.ly/1ShFiDP
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  • Комедії

КОМЕНТАРІ • 114

  • @yassqueen4069
    @yassqueen4069 5 місяців тому +1

    Cristela Alonzo you are so wonderful that i cannot get tired of listening to you. Blessings from Puerto Rico.

  • @bettymoreno7348
    @bettymoreno7348 3 роки тому +22

    She has beauty, brain and a beautiful voice
    💚💙💜🧡💛💚💙🧡

  • @lilwinged5291
    @lilwinged5291 3 роки тому +85

    She's not getting the laughs she deserves.. low key crowd..😃
    Seriously about Santa ... why does he take the credit when you work so hard to get your kids gifts ...😃

    • @g.gonzalez6138
      @g.gonzalez6138 3 роки тому +2

      I thought the same thing. But she's in Canada. A lot of the humor is geared towards American humor 😆

    • @williamkirby1940
      @williamkirby1940 3 роки тому

      She's not funny. Dont blame Canada,

    • @DallasStorm43
      @DallasStorm43 3 роки тому

      @@williamkirby1940 She is hilarious! That wasn't her best set. Look her up and watch other stuff by her. She is really super funny!

  • @KletoReese
    @KletoReese 3 роки тому +83

    The crowd was hopeless, Canadians are clueless. She was certainly Hilarious!!

  • @xxdarkgamerxx3929
    @xxdarkgamerxx3929 5 років тому +80

    Holy cow she the voice character from cars 3 the yellow car i'm like speechless

    • @iamdenislara
      @iamdenislara 4 роки тому +2

      Really? Now I have to watch that movie

    • @ibggetsemani1206
      @ibggetsemani1206 4 роки тому +3

      Barely saw it (like ended 10 minutes ago) I didn't even know there WAS a cars 3. That's why I'm here I didn't know her

    • @amininshassi6370
      @amininshassi6370 4 роки тому +6

      Yup, Cruz Ramirez.

    • @Drakel8603
      @Drakel8603 4 роки тому +4

      Cruz

    • @avatarazul5020
      @avatarazul5020 3 роки тому

      That's all I'm hearing, the banana car

  • @EJofLA
    @EJofLA 2 роки тому +4

    Love her material. Love her delivery. Thanks!

  • @adams1030
    @adams1030 5 років тому +68

    Love her!! I identify with some of what she says, and sometimes she says something gently mocking something I am (shopping at Whole Foods...) and I'm forced to be like... yeah lol fair point. 😂

  • @michaeleberry8663
    @michaeleberry8663 3 роки тому +7

    SHE'Z HILARIOUS ADORABLE 🥰 !!!

  • @luistentindo6334
    @luistentindo6334 5 років тому +18

    I love her material! Keep up the great work.

  • @carlosc2498
    @carlosc2498 5 років тому +13

    Loved it!

  • @tti3360
    @tti3360 3 роки тому +3

    You're something else 👏👏👏

  • @Smarteagle2008
    @Smarteagle2008 3 роки тому +12

    I love her! She is hilarious.

  • @elsuperguapo971
    @elsuperguapo971 3 роки тому +3

    Love her, la adoramos! 😘❤️

  • @JustineCarissa
    @JustineCarissa 5 років тому +14

    Good job Christela!

  • @Smarteagle2008
    @Smarteagle2008 3 роки тому +1

    👏👏👏The best!

  • @CRAIGKMSBISMARCKTIRPITZ533
    @CRAIGKMSBISMARCKTIRPITZ533 5 років тому +8

    I Love Cristela

  • @burningbunny370
    @burningbunny370 3 роки тому +2

    She makes me smile and wean her fans laugh it makes her happy 😊

  • @josesegura2090
    @josesegura2090 3 роки тому +34

    Please be aware this video could be harmful to your health! Whatever you do please don't eat and watch at the same time, I almost choked to death laughing, true story!

    • @addielo823
      @addielo823 3 роки тому +3

      You say as I eat and watch this video lol

  • @anaalarcon1875
    @anaalarcon1875 3 роки тому +3

    Awesome woman lots of blessings to u cristela

  • @Protectobot
    @Protectobot 3 роки тому +7

    My job MADE me a vampire cos I do graveyard shifts. Please don’t hate me, Cristy! 😂 😆

  • @frankmunoz8592
    @frankmunoz8592 2 роки тому +1

    Maybe see her so in Houston soon!! Very funny 😆

  • @zerubiszeus4687
    @zerubiszeus4687 5 років тому +20

    She's Catholic, but she has my vote 😂😋

  • @boxingipo9841
    @boxingipo9841 5 років тому +14

    She's awesome

  • @mariettaborders8468
    @mariettaborders8468 3 роки тому +4

    We still celebrate Kings Day in my family😁😂

  • @Drakel8603
    @Drakel8603 4 роки тому +6

    Cruuuuuz Ramirez

  • @tomfrazier1103
    @tomfrazier1103 3 роки тому +1

    My Mom's parents were 1st generation Americans, Russia, Italy, Russia.

  • @Protectobot
    @Protectobot 3 роки тому +5

    AWWWW, come on, Cristy: quinoa is ONLY $10 an ounce! 😂

    • @edithdlp8045
      @edithdlp8045 3 роки тому

      True. I once went to whole foods and bought an 8oz juice for $4. 😲
      And just bought it because I was already there and felt the pressure to buy something.

  • @clementevaldez1271
    @clementevaldez1271 8 місяців тому

    Estoy enamorado de ella....es una fantasia hecha realidad....I LOVE HER !!!!...

  • @MichalBreslau
    @MichalBreslau 4 роки тому +12

    So she is voicing that rabbit Hester in His Dark Materials.

  • @geostyma
    @geostyma 4 роки тому +9

    All mexicans went through this in America during Christmas.

  • @Flower4833
    @Flower4833 2 роки тому

    🙌❤️

  • @MugethiGitau
    @MugethiGitau 3 роки тому +2

    Jo jo jo!

  • @JazzyPantsINC
    @JazzyPantsINC 7 місяців тому

    “No Latinos in space?………..ok……..”
    Po Dameran: *sits in the corner and cries*

  • @user-bx4ti6ig3i
    @user-bx4ti6ig3i 4 роки тому +8

    Is this Cruz Ramírez?

  • @tequilagarciarodriguez6111
    @tequilagarciarodriguez6111 2 роки тому

    2:17 Oof.

  • @acchaladka
    @acchaladka 5 років тому +7

    Some very good stuff in here though “What’s up canada?” as an intro doesn’t really work in Québec...we’re soooo provincial guys.

  • @alainart
    @alainart 5 років тому +5

    ... why does her shirt say Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday?

    • @mr.nobody9697
      @mr.nobody9697 5 років тому +1

      lmfao that's hilarious! Her shirt is funnier than her routine.

    • @Protectobot
      @Protectobot 3 роки тому

      HAHA! I didn’t notice. I took Spanish in high school: not French!

  • @flaregun81
    @flaregun81 5 років тому +1

    ah canablisom

  • @scottbuckley823
    @scottbuckley823 4 роки тому +9

    Mostly funny but the 'no latinos in space' makes no sense Oscar issac is from Cuban /, Guatemalian backround

    • @Protectobot
      @Protectobot 3 роки тому +1

      So she missed one?! 😂 technically, the ppl in Star Wars aren’t humans but just look like them 😂 ‘a long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away’ or somethin’

    • @edithdlp8045
      @edithdlp8045 3 роки тому

      There was a latino in space, Diego Luna.

    • @quietnerdything
      @quietnerdything 2 роки тому

      This set is from 2016, but the material was probably written before The Force Awakens which came out the year before this.

  • @cesariogalicia2136
    @cesariogalicia2136 10 місяців тому +1

    We Mexican r good for three things singing comedians or boxers no bs u guys

  • @angiebega2444
    @angiebega2444 2 роки тому

    🤣👍

  • @ketket0725
    @ketket0725 3 роки тому +9

    These folks have no soul how are they not pee-laughing??

  • @michaeleberry8663
    @michaeleberry8663 3 роки тому

    I WOULDN'T!! YOU'D NEVER KNOW WHERE THEY'VE BEEN!!! LIL GRINZ...

  • @ladymarycrawley6613
    @ladymarycrawley6613 Рік тому +1

    She's too realistic and makes us laugh about our choices and mistakes. And honestly sci-fi is believable and rom-com not, why why why

  • @MrBrownnn696
    @MrBrownnn696 2 роки тому

    Haha

  • @thepubkin1775
    @thepubkin1775 4 роки тому +1

    Eh.

  • @melvina628
    @melvina628 5 років тому +5

    How expensive is a piece of fruit?

    • @Protectobot
      @Protectobot 3 роки тому

      A lot more than a bag of fruit gummy candy (I love both) and esp. organic fruit. Veggies are cheaper but stuff like quinoa and other ‘health foods’ are expensive 😵

    • @melvina628
      @melvina628 3 роки тому +1

      @@Protectobot Typically, people who go vegan have stopped eating processed food made in laboratories. So, eating candy and processed "health foods" is not an option. The point of eating vegan is to eat healthy food. Eating healthy food typically means eating fresh, organic produce, which is less expensive than processed, lab food.

    • @Protectobot
      @Protectobot 3 роки тому

      @@melvina628 Honestly I'm not sure about what's cheaper. I argued that vegetables overall are cheap except when they're organic. I tried eating vegetarian once in college and it felt expensive. Hormone-free milk tends to be expensive, e.g. Shopping around helps. Ppl can't even agree on whether organic food is healthier either.

    • @melvina628
      @melvina628 3 роки тому

      @@Protectobot I addressed the organic issue. Is hormone-free milk from animals? If so, it's not vegan. Almond milk, rice milk, and coconut milk are examples of vegan "milk".

    • @edithdlp8045
      @edithdlp8045 3 роки тому

      I once went and it was $1 for ONE apple. I thought it was for a pound.

  • @alexpastor8582
    @alexpastor8582 6 місяців тому

    the crowd was ok

  • @gswizzy17
    @gswizzy17 4 роки тому +3

    SHe does not sound like someone from Texas

    • @JuanRamirez-rc3ce
      @JuanRamirez-rc3ce 4 роки тому +13

      Im from Texas, and she does. Texas is big, and diverse. Not everyone sounds like Matthew McConaughey.

  • @HenryEarthbound
    @HenryEarthbound 10 місяців тому

    She made a January 6 joke in 2016

  • @eloinaseguro5230
    @eloinaseguro5230 3 роки тому +1

    CRISTELA, YOU SO WRONG MÉXICO IS AMERICA TOO, SO WE LIVE IN THE SAME CONTINENT SO YOU ARE U.S CITIZEN AND WE ALL AMERICANS WE NEED MORE GEOGRAPHY THEN JOKES 🙉😝😟

    • @annaolivarez2578
      @annaolivarez2578 Місяць тому

      You need to improve your grammar and punctuation. Hopefully, you will be able to teach others about the USA and Mexico. By the way, it is common for Mexicans in Mexico to call the Hispanics from the USA: Norteños. Personally, I don’t recall anybody from America calling Mexicans the “people of the South”, or whatever.

  • @cryingemoji681
    @cryingemoji681 5 років тому

    Why does it look like she's trying to do sign language...

  • @raystaar
    @raystaar 2 роки тому

    Healthy food is in the produce aisle and it's the cheapest stuff there is.

  • @monsterjambrony
    @monsterjambrony 5 місяців тому

    Why does Cristela always talk about being from Mexican heritage? I don’t care where my family came from!

    • @deechicago25
      @deechicago25 3 місяці тому

      It’s for material and try to relate. Plus 1st gen Mexican American are usually cultured and are very connected to the roots. That’s very sad you don’t care. You prob white? Rite

    • @monsterjambrony
      @monsterjambrony 3 місяці тому

      @@deechicago25 Yeah, I’m white. I am either 4th or 5th generation Italian-American, by the way.

    • @deechicago25
      @deechicago25 2 місяці тому

      Yea usually after 2nd gen the culture is long gone.

  • @nubianeagle8634
    @nubianeagle8634 3 роки тому +1

    come to Africa.It's cheap to live healthy because we eat a lot of organic natural food.
    No need for false labeling.

    • @nubianeagle8634
      @nubianeagle8634 3 роки тому

      @303StreetMachines😂😂😂who told you that would happen?
      Besides you can by straight from market places or a farm that grows them.
      (The ones in my area are not crowded don't worry)

    • @keithbannister9271
      @keithbannister9271 3 роки тому

      The water in Africa is horrible, and the electrical system sucks!!!!

    • @nubianeagle8634
      @nubianeagle8634 3 роки тому

      @@keithbannister9271 where have you been in Africa. You know not all African countries are the same.

  • @gear14
    @gear14 3 роки тому

    Go vegan and suddenly food is cheaper lol

  • @edber4391
    @edber4391 5 років тому +2

    I wish I could take my view back

  • @moo7445
    @moo7445 5 років тому +3

    What are they laughing at

  • @arcticridge
    @arcticridge 5 років тому +6

    BOOOOOOO

  • @Hangar101
    @Hangar101 4 роки тому +3

    She's barely funny, she needs to ask Angela Johnson for some tips.

  • @margaretlisboa563
    @margaretlisboa563 3 роки тому

    Sorry I didn’t think she was funny at all

  • @daleholbert3111
    @daleholbert3111 5 років тому +1

    Booooo

  • @FooseontheMove
    @FooseontheMove 4 роки тому

    why are so called comedians not funny now a days? I thought in order to be a comedian you had to be funny.

  • @seanbaugh3239
    @seanbaugh3239 5 років тому +3

    "Cristela Alonzo: Barely Funny" would have been a better title. The skid marks in my boxer shorts have more substance than her material !!! Keep trying !!!
    *"NUFF SAID"*