years ago, while riding motocross, I had a "duh" moment, forgot to check the fuel in my bike, ran out over a huge jump, and crashed hard. Several hours of surgery, the docs put me back together. Recovering in the hospital, friends and family bring get well cards and balloons, the usual. My cousin though, brought a gas can. I laughed so hard I nearly split my stitches!
When my kids have the hiccups and want to know how to get rid of them, I always tell them that there is only one way that works every time. Just hold your breath till they stop.
If at first you don't succeed… Then Airborne definitely isn't for you. Also, I found it isn't ALL Soldiers that get the dark humor. The POGs generally find dark humor unacceptable. Like, in EO Leader Course, it was me and another infantryman surrounded by POGs and we were talking about sexist jokes. The instructor asked if we knew any sexist jokes to try and get us involved...said there would be no judgement. So...I raise my hand and say "Why can't Hellen Keller drive a car?" to which i get responses like "cause she's blind/deaf/whatever" and I said "......nah.....it's cause she's woman". Then they all just looked shocked. So I was like "nah...i'm just kidding. it's cause she's dead". Apparently.....that was NOT a judgement free zone.
I will point out that there's a difference between dark and warped. Jokes about death at sea or under fire are a thing - jokes about somebody's competence or character are not.
They asked for a sexist joke, so WTH is the problem with some other slightly distasteful one. I never found anyone in the Army that was uptight like that, POG or not. BTW, that wasn't bad. I might remember to use that one.
I was at a suicide with my Sgt., and a rookie I was training. A buddy of mine had hung himself in his garage next to his 70 GTX. The orange extension cord had stretched over night, then snapped, and dumped him on the floor. The rookie says "why is he lying on the floor?" I just blurted out "He clearly didn't want to hang around any longer." My Sgt. punches me in the right shoulder and said "Shut up. His wife is still inside the house." Then he chuckled.
@ It was. He owned a 69 Road Runner and the 70 GTX. I owned a 69 Charger. They were both B body cars so we could trade parts when we needed them. I was sad to see him lying there. Edited: Spelling.
@@bartmitchell It was black with black interior. I believe it was originally a 440 auto car but was converted to an 833 and a six pack. His Road Runner was a red 383 auto car.
We lost friends over in afghanistan, and when we all got back home and regrouped, some of us had come out of training to grieve. I remember all of us being so sad, and in mourning, thinking about the girlfriends and wives. The parents of the fallen. All of us in such a depleted state of morale. Our first sergeant walks in, also clearly visibly upset, but without breaking stride after talking about our losses, he says “Nick had one of the biggest heads I’ve ever seen. I mean, his noggin was huge!” That got many of us laughing. I still remember how much that helped me and my buddies cope. He DID have a gigantic head.
I remember rolling up on a motorcycle accident. The man's right leg was mutilated and before my brain could over ride my mouth, I said "dude your leg kept your bike from getting a scratch. Way to go." The people that don't understand our humor (or lack of) have never had their hands where we have had ours. Stay safe everyone.
I ride motorcycles and that is exactly the type of thing I would say.. Lol. What makes it worse is I would laugh at my own joke. Some people just don't get it.
Me too I would have found that hilarious. At least eventually 😂
4 роки тому+9
My first call as a volunteer firefighter and first responder back in high school was a jeep that flipped with groceries in it. They warned me it was a bad one. Ground hamburger and brains in the road, worst yard sale ever.
When my mom was dying of colorectal cancer, at one point, she looked me dead in the eye, and she said, "Colon cancer is such a pain in the ass." I was stunned, not sure how to respond, and then she cracks a smile and burst out laughing, saying, "You should see the look on your face!" My mom was awesome, and she was a total champ up to the end. She knew dying was easy, but living with loss is hard, and I think her humor not only helped her cope with a hopeless situation, but also made it easier for me to accept her fate and move on with my life. 54 is just too young to die, but she lived life with a smile and laughter, and made me realize that even when on Death's doorstep, it's okay to light a paper bag of dog doo on fire, ring his doorbell, and run like mad!
Been there last year. Ovarian with mine though. Lost at 59. Maybe humor could have helped. Sometimes I stare off into space when left alone with my thoughts. Taken months to regularly distract myself again instead of being perpetually consumed by memories those last few weeks she had. Props to your mom for joking on the way out. Waking up miserable is something I don't recommend. Guess it's something to remember to do for your kids before times up.
I pat myself on the back for coming up with this one: "did you ever kill anyone while you were in the military? "let me put it this way, the only person I ever had the chance to kill was me, and I couldn't even pull that off." I don't often get a laugh out of that one, but I think it's hilarious.
True geezer tale. After my father's funeral a bunch of us had gathered at the house with mom. All my siblings and spouses etc. Anyway everyone solemn and very, very quiet. Pop was our Gibraltar and especially for me. We had gotten very close over many hours of fishing together, just the 2 of us and he told me things I know he never entrusted to others because in his vernacular, I "could hold my mud". WE were literally just milling around trying to console my mother and dealing with our grief when sirens started being heard. Multiple sirens just going on and on for endless minutes. One of my self righteous sisters said "What could all those sirens be about. OMG they won't stop. Why won't they stop?" I said "It's Pop. He's on his way home because he's not done yet". If looks could kill I'd have been roasted on the spot. Pop would have laughed. He was a WW II vet that survived 3 years in the Pacific island hopping with the bad asses. He didn't tell me but one of his buddies told me at his funeral "Somewhere your old man has a box full of medals"
In 19 years, I’ve seen and heard a lot of horrific things, but last month I had my heart ripped out by a 5y/o. After we called DOA on the parents, my supervisor called me next door to check on the kids. The 5 y/o looked up as his older sister was talking to LE and said “He killed my mommy and daddy. I have nowhere to live.” Rips your heart out. But there are happy times in EMS too. It’s not all bad. I had two Cardiac Arrest saves in a month several years ago, and that is also something that will stay in my head. Unfortunately we don’t get as many of those back as I wish we did, but like a lady told me, if God wants them, there is nothing you can do about it. But I do want to thank you John for including EMS. Keep up the great work.
Lol not all ER nurses are created equal. Rolled in a little old lady who fell face first into a concrete park bench, caved in her face... As I'm telling the triage nurse what we've done, I mention that she's bleeding from her eyes, and that i think her dentures have broken and she interrupts and demands to know why I didn't remove them. She stomps over as I tell her that her face is a broken mess, but her airway is fine, she fishes in this lady's mouth grabs the broken dentures pulls them out with this bloody spaghetti looking shit that I can only assume to be sinuses, drops them on her face and runs off to puke... An ER doc hears us laughing and asks where the triage nurse went, and all that came out was "I think she had spaghetti for lunch"... 😂
You're exactly right! I'm also an ER nurse and it warms my heart to no end when some sweet innocent looking female ER nurse cracks the darkest joke in the midst of cops and EMT. The looks on their faces....
While taking care of a man in the E.R. years ago, after he had been run over by a car. The man suddenly convulsed really hard, and puked straight into the air, what looked like a whole lot of spaghetti. Some of that, being deflected by his E.T. tube holder, goes sideways and lands in the hair of a fellow Respiratory Therapist's "big hair". She started running and squeeling etc,,, and I looked across the patient at the Doctor and said, "I wonder what they've got for lunch down in the cafeteria", and he looks at the patient, now covered in his own puke and says, "for some reason I've got a hankerin for spaghetti". A second or two later, the guy convulses again with the same result. A huge amount. So, I look at the Doctor again and say, "looks like they've got some kind of an all you can eat deal going on wherever this guy had lunch".
Turquoise Cheetah the ones laughing aren’t the ones fucking up. It’s more likely the over confident I know it all types that are super serious all the time.
Turquoise Cheetah lack of compassion? If you refer back to the story, while the respiratory therapist ran out of the room abandoning the patient, who was left bedside and tending to the patient? That’s right, the man that “lacks compassion”. Fuck off.
An Engineer (12B type, not the slide rule type) teaching my Master Breacher class said, "Remember, if you screw this up, a fine red mist feels zero pain." I mean, he wasn't wrong!
Thanks for the message, John. 24 years in EMS taught me the principles of Body Substance Isolation (BSI, gloves, mask, etc.). Unfortunately there is no way to isolate oneself emotionally from the horrors we experience as part of the job. Extreme Emotional Detachment works for those with no soul, and those devoid of empathy. The rest of us resort to gallows humor with mixed results. The best man from my wedding also worked in EMS. Late last year he took his own life. It was devastating for the entire EMS community. Caring for others takes its toll on a person, both physically and emotionally. I've sacrificed two knee joints, lumbar discs, and a 27 year marriage for my community. Exposure and exhaustion from the job has twice given me pneumonia, (the last time was very nearly fatal.) I contracted meningitis from a man who died from it and a slightly surly disposition from an up close and personal evaluation of the human condition. And I laugh at inappropriate things. Like the sign posted by a coworker at quarters that read: "Sexual harassment at this location will not be reported, it will be graded." Thank you for the message. Please keep up the good work.
Fire/Rescue, I assisted on a self-inflicted GSW to the head. after making it to the hospital I turned to a nurse in the ER and said “I just couldn’t see what he was thinking.” She just shook her head and walked away.
When I worked in the cemetery in college, we were given a lawn motor and told to go mow. I'll never forget one day having lunch a couple walking by, stopped with a look of horror. My coworker was sitting on a headstone having lunch. The couple said with disgust, "what are you doing!?" He replied, "I'm having lunch with Grandma" 😮
Retired Paramedic. I love it when someone asks if they're gonna die. My standard answer is, "YES" They didn't ask WHEN. So I didn't tell them Asystole ....its a very stable rhythm If it's wet and sticky and not yours...don't touch it.
I remember one of my fellow officers relating a call he responded to where a guy's throat was cut when he went through a plate glass window. He told me the guy looked like a "human Pez dispenser." I thought it was the funniest thing I'd ever heard until I repeated it at a family gathering and was informed, "That's not funny, Jerry."
I told a similar story a short while back at dinner with friends. One couple (retired LEO and Dispatcher) got it, my wife (retired LEO) and boys (well duh) got it; but the other couple (civilians)... well, let's just say I was reminded that not everyone sees the world in the same way. BTW, in my story the guy was only "mostly dead"... and the ensuing fight was... festive.
So I was at a social gathering when I mentioned that one of the best ways to go was to burn. The crispy critters are always smiling and waving. We ended up leaving, the wife was mortified. I think I was too hip for the room.
Had a old woman freeze to death in her backyard, literally frozen to the ground. Ambulance rolls up and I'm like don't need you guys. There replie, "We're pretty good." I reply, "Not that good though."
My buddy once said in an ambush..."If i dont die today I will live forever with Olga!" ...we had a rolling joke in the legion. He's Russian and always joked that Russians joined the legion to get away from marrying a Olga. Lol
We had one guy we called "The Wiemanerian (pronounced "why-mannerian") Pig Fucker because he was always banging fat German chicks in Frankfurt. This was the early '90s when the Wall came down.
As a paramedic thanks for not forgetting us in EMS. 👋 My graveyard humor story: I just finished running my first code as a solo medic (the patient remained deceased) and my EMT partner went to fist bump me and told me, "killed it!"
It made the bad times worse...... That made them funny. Give me hand will you, will pulling a body out of the rubble after bombing the hell out of it (Stinking). Then out of nowhere a hand hits me in the chest with a cartoon slap and drops into my lap. The longest 3 seconds of my life before someone giggles and we carried on as if nothing happened.
Keep laughing or start dieing. Trench humor is gods gift to the warriors tortured soul. It lets pressure off of the hell inside and out. It had to happen or worse thjngs happen.
Responded to a call some years back re: a guy who’d had a heart attack while in a bathtub. He’d apparently been in there for a few days. Without going in to specifics, we had to find a way to mentally disassociate from the tragedy. One guy called him “Stewie.” We cracked up. Unless you’ve been a cop or military you would never comprehend the graveyard humor.
Of all the things I’ve seen, bodies that have been in water too long are hands down the worse. Nothing like grabbing them to have the skin slide off like an onion 🤢
Even prior to my time in the Navy and my wife becoming a paramedic, this has always been my form of humor. You either have people that understand it or you get to see the shock value of it.
The image of Evan being consoled and carried away by John... “It’s ok, we can do this” literally killed me. Something about being in uniform has warped my sense of humor when I’m around other uniformed people I know closely.
I will NEVER apologize for having a sense of gallows humor. It has helped me get through a lifetime of hardship. My Oma lived through WW2 Berlin and she had a great dark and self effacing sense of humor about it all. I always respected that.
Life has taught me that God thinks irony is hilarious and his sense of humor is often darker than mine. But I should expect no less, The Lord is a warrior and his name is the Lord.
Sitting around the campfire with friends I told a funny anecdote from a call earlier that week. I later learned that everyone was traumatized to some extent from the story. People not on the job just don't understand.
Traumatized from a story? Disgusted, angry, insulted....I could maybe see, but traumatized? Wow, a very large part of this country has become weak and pathetic.
@@sheepdog8395 Well, in mixed company some kind of adverse reaction should probably be expected. Fortunately about the worst reaction I get from my wife is something like "that's gross," accompanied by some funny faces, and insincere disgust....and that kind of reaction is far from any kind of deterrent, quite the opposite.
When I or my siblings got hurt when we're were little kids, our dad would say, "You'll surely die after that." It freaked us out until we realized what he meant. Growing up with that warped since of humor has served us well through the years. Two police officers and one fireman in the bunch.
Heck my Dad was SRT(SWAT) and then was in charge of the homicide division, and my mom was an ER nurse. From the time I was born graveyard humor was our dinner talk. I never had a chance to be normal.
My wife and I are retired law enforcement. I have two boys (16 and 12) and they don't really recognize dinner time without this kind of humor; almost always from their mom. No one really wants to be "normal", as normal accomplishes nothing. Sounds to me like you had an extraordinary upbringing and that is much better.
True story: someone was signing off a FaceTime call, and said, “Any last words?” “Right before I die, I’m gonna eat 400 unpopped popcorn kernels so the guy who cremates me gets scared.”
@@bobk1456 A lot of people after this pandemic will need supplemental oxygen. And if they laugh so hard their tubes come out and don't stop laughing... well lets call it 99.6.
My grandfather passed away early in the a.m. of 9/11. He was a salt of the earth type; always wore a smile, never met a person he didn't like, give you the shirt off his back type of guy. We were driving to his house when the plane struck the first tower. The compound effect of those two great tragedies was more than me or my siblings could really process without a little graveyard humor. While our parents met to make funeral arrangements, we kids made jokes. We laughed, cried, and confirmed that if we were indeed going to hell, this would be the reason, but that laughter really helped us.
I remember at airborne school the black hats telling about our reserve chutes. If that reserve chute don’t open up, airborne, you’ll have the rest of your life to figure it out.
When I worked for the ME's [Office of the Medical Examiner's], field investigations were sometimes very sad and upsetting. To release the tension, we would use this type of humor.
Thanks for this video. Helps me feel like I'm not the only one. I'm not military, police, or EMS. I'm a tradesman. While I don't get shot at regularly for work, I still deal with stuff that will kill you before you even realize you're getting killed. An abundance of dark humor is found on our jobsites. I noticed a long time ago that the things that actually make me laugh are very dark and bleak. My wife doesn't understand, and at times will get pretty damn mad when I crack a joke about "something that isn't funny," but it's quite literally a coping mechanism for me. She's come to sort of understand it, but it still makes her uncomfortable most times. Good to know I'm not alone!
Yeah, being both military and EMS, I've gotten my fair share of "holy crap did he just say that" looks from friends and family. We don't mean to sound horrible, but you have to find humor in the terrible in order to cope with it.
Being a hospital pharmacist this is a standard part of my job! What's always hilarious is that department management types in healthcare rarely understand or approve of such humor because it doesn't follow all of the feel good official mission statements of the hospital but it's high stakes/high stress stuff that we do and you can either laugh or you can be a ball of stress and anxiety.
I’ve been working in emergency departments for the last few years. It’s pretty much universal in this setting too, among docs, nurses, techs - everyone. People who have a problem with it never last long.
Right on brother. Thank you for addressing the topic of graveyard humor, also known as gallows humor. I am a military veteran and a former firefighter. I also have friends in law enforcement and have worked in joint incidents with law enforcement. You are 100% true that graveyard humor is part of the glue that binds members of these groups together. I have observed that each of these groups are a true brotherhood/sisterhood within the group. They share the same unshakeable belief in themselves and each other. They perform heroic deeds, not for themselves, but for their brothers and sisters. There is a deeply held ethos in each group that I will have your back because I know you have mine. Unfortunately, I don't see the same respect and commitment between these groups. I have participated in many incidents where two or more groups were working the same incident. It too often became a contest between groups rather than a mutual commitment to get the job done. An example is that on many incidents each participating agency would hold its own "classified" briefing, excluding representatives of the other groups. I remember an occasion where I saw a poster in a law enforcement office that said "The reason God made police officers is so that firefighters would have someone to look up to". Perhaps that is another example of graveyard humor, but I find it disturbing that these groups who are so bound together within themselves are suspicious of, and sometimes outright hostile to, other groups who are also working to the same goal of saving lives, property, and providing security. Come on guys and gals, work together and respect each other. You are all fantastic, have the same core values, and same goals.
During a particularly wicked firefight where we were trying to take cover behind pebbles, the corpsman screamed at his Marines to put those cigarettes out because "THOSE DAMN THINGS WILL KILL YOU!!"
While my Dad, Brothers and I were choosing a coffin for my dead mother; I was doing stand-up for the funeral director and his lovely assistant. I understand the entire dynamic of the humor and morbidity cocktail all too well. My stepdaughter is a funeral director. When she drinks, she says stuff that'll curl your hair.
When I was in the Border Patrol, I found a decomposed corpse in the desert. So, I called it in. Me: I have a dead body northwest of Gordon's Well. Supervisor: Are you sure he's dead? Me: Well, I honked the horn and he didn't get up.
I had a t-shirt back in the day, it said "It's a green thing, you wouldn't understand". I did thirty years in the Patrol, I get it. Just wondering if it's the same Gordon's Well, or if it's one of those "blue gate" things.
So my Uncle passed away at the same time my wife was in labor. A few days later we were going to his funeral and we passed the cemetery he was going to be laid to rest in. My wife asked “How far from your grandparents is your uncle going to be?” Without skipping a beat I said “A tombstones throw away.”
Exactly. Thank you John! I was blessed to work with two Army colonels, then side by side with a retired major general who became my mentor and my best friend. As a corporate nurse at the time we were first responders to more than I could have imagined. He let me know that our humor was not only okay, but it was the essential valve on a pressure cooker. As an attorney for over 20 years now, I realize how that gentle but fierce general's attitude gifted me with salty wisdom and grit, yet essential smiles.
Ive found that this humor has helped get through some of the stuff I’ve seen as a volunteer firefighter. It has gotten me some dirty looks from people when I say something not thinking about who’s around me.
When I was in Afghan with the Seabees We would Entertain ourselves by finding a local with fingernail polish or other "clues" and point to our LPO And tell him fiki fiki while we touch the tips of our index fingers together. We would find his response of confusion and outrage hilarious 😂🤣😂🤣
First one that comes to my mind was on a house fire a few years ago, we're watching it, knowing it's beyond saving, we know there's bodies to remove and our safety officer is wandering around and he says "Hey! It kinda smells like barbeque! Where's the sauce?" and incident command chuckles and says "Sir, there's bodies in there" and the Safety replies "well there's gonna be another one if the chef doesn't bring me my gosh darn barbeque sauce!" and I couldn't help but laugh. It was 4 am, we watched that fire since 10 PM and it was incredibly refreshing to have some humor despite the situation
When I was in the base honor guard we ran on this stuff. The team would never cut up in front of a grieving family but that van ride to and from the cemetery could get pretty raw. Our motto was "We put the fun into funeral".
I am a retired Submariner, did a career change now work EMS. A wierd sense of humor is definitely a survival mechanism. Only those who work in these fields can understand. It isn't us being cold, it just let's us vent in a way that is bearable.
After 30 plus years in EMS as a medic, air medic, Fire Dept. I was in the military as a medic also but that was easy stuff. I have heard a lot of graveyard humor and it helped me get through the grind of seeing the worst stuff. I am now retired and when the night comes I still see dead people and remember all the crap I saw and dealt with for all those years. It never leaves you. When I was at work it was easy but now retired not so much. Great video John.
“Have no regrets. The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.” - unknown From a retired RN
Vietnam vet friend of mine was shot 2 times in 'nam, both in the same engagement. He ended up killing his shooter which was a little vietnamese woman with a 03 Springfield rifle. You should hear some of the jokes he makes about this...
Really appreciate this video. As an ER nurse and EMT for the last 30 year, graveyard humor gets you through the shift and the day!! Thanks for all your great videos!
That's kind of like an Army friend of mine told me 1 day when I die he wanted my paint horse. I freaked him out with my reply that he could have my paint horse only if he killed me. Otherwise he would have to ask my wife. He thought for a few minutes & then replied how do you want to die cause I don't want to talk to your wife. LOL
Been at it for almost 20 years. I have to be really careful how I joke around “normal” people. It’s kind of funny to see the looks one their faces when something slips past my filter
That's the first I have heard of that one. Are we really calling it that? It's starting to get appropriate. Not quite yet, but if this keeps up it could.
A story I will never forget took place about a year and a half ago. We were called to the graveyard of a nearby town with our ambulance and an emergency physician. We were told the undertakter had collapsed on the graveyard and his apprentice was performing CPR. We arrived and found the undertaker in cardiac arrest, at the entrance of the graveyard in his suit and tie, with the apprentice performing CPR as we were told. We took over and continued advanced CPR for more than half an hour but didn't succeed in bringing him back and discontinued trying after his wife, whom his apprentice had called in the meantime, told us on the phone that her husband, our patient, had a severe heart condition. Over here in Germany though, EMS isn't allowed to transport a patient after they've been declared dead and we couldn't just call the local undertaker because, well, he wasn't really able to do his job right now - or ever again. So we decided to pick him up and carry him to the nearby chapel located on the graveyard - almost every graveyard here in Germany has one - and put him on the table where they usually display the coffin during the funeral. We even took some medical suture and sewed his shirt, which we had cut open, back together and fixed his tie. On our way out our physician turns to the rest of our team and, without a motion on his face says: "At least he's dressed for the occasion". That was when we all started bursting into laughter on that graveyard and I'm probably going to hell for that - but it was a relief we needed.
Im a paramedic. Had a girl with a dead baby hanging out of her once. After the call my partner started cracking jokes about red frog legs...I made the choice to laugh & let the humor push aside the sadness I felt over the gravity of the situation. It's a total coping mechanism. Thanks John! Love your stuff.
My Dad died two months ago from Kidney Failure because he wasn't able to get a dr's appt thanks to Covid. I remember my uncle told me, with the most serious look on his face, "don't worry, the kidney did its job... he won't be needing another transplant." We all started laughing
I once worked at a graveyard. It was a pretty rewarding job and I had a lot of people under me.
Congrats! Good graveyards are in high demand.
People are dying to get in.
Lol!
I like what ya did there. Smart.
That was just cold. Stone cold.
I spit my beer all over my screen when i read this joke haha
years ago, while riding motocross, I had a "duh" moment, forgot to check the fuel in my bike, ran out over a huge jump, and crashed hard. Several hours of surgery, the docs put me back together. Recovering in the hospital, friends and family bring get well cards and balloons, the usual. My cousin though, brought a gas can.
I laughed so hard I nearly split my stitches!
Legit been there, first moto forgot to turn my fuel switch on...
Dude your cousin is hilarious!
Mate, your cousin is epic.
Gotta love your friends . Lol, that was funny
Saw a pic online the other day of someone that works in a morgue wearing a t-shirt that said "Last Responder". XD
I have a buddy that runs a mortuary. I need to find that shirt for him.
We're the last to let you down
@@jimviens-realtor Dark humour at it's finest.
Now THAT is damn funny !!
🤣🤣🤣
"Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back."
- Marcus Aurelius
You are a little soul carrying about a corpse.
MARCUS AURELIUS
Everyone should read Meditations. Especially professions mentioned in the video.
Nice
I won't forget it.
Death smiled his black tooth grin at me already, & I kicked him in his Boney Crotch ..
As an EMT we have a saying. All bleeding stops eventually.
When my kids have the hiccups and want to know how to get rid of them, I always tell them that there is only one way that works every time. Just hold your breath till they stop.
Not if you have enough packed cells and a Belmont infuser, you could keep that bleeding going indefinitely!!!!
I'm a dialysis tech. I've said something similar. "All problems solve themselves" lol
Asystole: the most stable of all cardiac rhythms.
@@NoNo_Notlikethat rotflmmfao!! 😂😂🤧
Combat medic says to a wounded solder "I've got band-aids, aspirin and a .45. How bad does it hurt?"
That one must be old lol
That's an old one. I can tell because the joke now would have Motrin not aspirin. The docs dish out Motrin like it was candy.
I knew that one back in the day as Navy Corpsmen.
.45 definitely makes it old
If at first you don't succeed… Then Airborne definitely isn't for you.
Also, I found it isn't ALL Soldiers that get the dark humor. The POGs generally find dark humor unacceptable. Like, in EO Leader Course, it was me and another infantryman surrounded by POGs and we were talking about sexist jokes. The instructor asked if we knew any sexist jokes to try and get us involved...said there would be no judgement. So...I raise my hand and say "Why can't Hellen Keller drive a car?" to which i get responses like "cause she's blind/deaf/whatever" and I said "......nah.....it's cause she's woman". Then they all just looked shocked. So I was like "nah...i'm just kidding. it's cause she's dead". Apparently.....that was NOT a judgement free zone.
The Army has gotten too PC, and full of the perpetually butthurt.
I was in the Navy and we used dark humor all the time. Way more so working on an ambulance tho
lmao really? i guess the AF isnt that bad we'd of laughed at that, that shit was funny
I will point out that there's a difference between dark and warped. Jokes about death at sea or under fire are a thing - jokes about somebody's competence or character are not.
They asked for a sexist joke, so WTH is the problem with some other slightly distasteful one. I never found anyone in the Army that was uptight like that, POG or not. BTW, that wasn't bad. I might remember to use that one.
Some of my favorite humor is the type that can be followed up with, "Too soon?"
I was at a suicide with my Sgt., and a rookie I was training. A buddy of mine had hung himself in his garage next to his 70 GTX. The orange extension cord had stretched over night, then snapped, and dumped him on the floor. The rookie says "why is he lying on the floor?" I just blurted out "He clearly didn't want to hang around any longer." My Sgt. punches me in the right shoulder and said "Shut up. His wife is still inside the house." Then he chuckled.
Lolz tragic
Oof
@ It was. He owned a 69 Road Runner and the 70 GTX. I owned a 69 Charger. They were both B body cars so we could trade parts when we needed them. I was sad to see him lying there.
Edited: Spelling.
Tell me more about the 70 GTX.....
@@bartmitchell It was black with black interior. I believe it was originally a 440 auto car but was converted to an 833 and a six pack. His Road Runner was a red 383 auto car.
We lost friends over in afghanistan, and when we all got back home and regrouped, some of us had come out of training to grieve. I remember all of us being so sad, and in mourning, thinking about the girlfriends and wives. The parents of the fallen. All of us in such a depleted state of morale.
Our first sergeant walks in, also clearly visibly upset, but without breaking stride after talking about our losses, he says “Nick had one of the biggest heads I’ve ever seen. I mean, his noggin was huge!”
That got many of us laughing. I still remember how much that helped me and my buddies cope. He DID have a gigantic head.
I remember rolling up on a motorcycle accident. The man's right leg was mutilated and before my brain could over ride my mouth, I said "dude your leg kept your bike from getting a scratch. Way to go." The people that don't understand our humor (or lack of) have never had their hands where we have had ours. Stay safe everyone.
I ride motorcycles and that is exactly the type of thing I would say.. Lol. What makes it worse is I would laugh at my own joke. Some people just don't get it.
I would have laughed.
Me too I would have found that hilarious. At least eventually 😂
My first call as a volunteer firefighter and first responder back in high school was a jeep that flipped with groceries in it. They warned me it was a bad one. Ground hamburger and brains in the road, worst yard sale ever.
I bet everytime he tells what happened he says he saved his bike.
When my mom was dying of colorectal cancer, at one point, she looked me dead in the eye, and she said, "Colon cancer is such a pain in the ass." I was stunned, not sure how to respond, and then she cracks a smile and burst out laughing, saying, "You should see the look on your face!" My mom was awesome, and she was a total champ up to the end. She knew dying was easy, but living with loss is hard, and I think her humor not only helped her cope with a hopeless situation, but also made it easier for me to accept her fate and move on with my life. 54 is just too young to die, but she lived life with a smile and laughter, and made me realize that even when on Death's doorstep, it's okay to light a paper bag of dog doo on fire, ring his doorbell, and run like mad!
Been there last year. Ovarian with mine though. Lost at 59. Maybe humor could have helped. Sometimes I stare off into space when left alone with my thoughts. Taken months to regularly distract myself again instead of being perpetually consumed by memories those last few weeks she had.
Props to your mom for joking on the way out. Waking up miserable is something I don't recommend.
Guess it's something to remember to do for your kids before times up.
Shouldn't we be waiting until after the virus runs its course to do the 2020 census?
"Obviously, what a silly question..
What kind of dead-beat wouldn't see the sense in that"!?
As a US postal worker... my thoughts exactly.
And will there be a Citizenship question then?
yes i LOL'd at that one.... such a rational, simple question.
I won’t count on it.
I pat myself on the back for coming up with this one:
"did you ever kill anyone while you were in the military?
"let me put it this way, the only person I ever had the chance to kill was me, and I couldn't even pull that off."
I don't often get a laugh out of that one, but I think it's hilarious.
As someone who worked in a propulsion powerplant with radiation, high voltage, and high-pressure steam, that is quite cute.
“Yes, but only for food”
Bryon Mosier thank you, I’m stealing that 😂
That's the important thing. It makes you crack up F the rest!
It was because of all that suicide prevention training lol
Yes Military/First Responders humor is extremely dark. We see things at times though, that if we don't laugh, we would cry.
That's exactly it.
If its worth crying over, you should cry over it.
@@WarPoet-In-Training if you dont laugh you will go crazy and into deep depression
I tell the Newjacks coming on "laugh every day because a day will come when all you can do is cry"
Very well said
True geezer tale. After my father's funeral a bunch of us had gathered at the house with mom. All my siblings and spouses etc. Anyway everyone solemn and very, very quiet. Pop was our Gibraltar and especially for me. We had gotten very close over many hours of fishing together, just the 2 of us and he told me things I know he never entrusted to others because in his vernacular, I "could hold my mud". WE were literally just milling around trying to console my mother and dealing with our grief when sirens started being heard. Multiple sirens just going on and on for endless minutes. One of my self righteous sisters said "What could all those sirens be about. OMG they won't stop. Why won't they stop?" I said "It's Pop. He's on his way home because he's not done yet". If looks could kill I'd have been roasted on the spot. Pop would have laughed. He was a WW II vet that survived 3 years in the Pacific island hopping with the bad asses. He didn't tell me but one of his buddies told me at his funeral "Somewhere your old man has a box full of medals"
Sounds like your old Man was pretty awesome.
I'm sure your dad got a chuckle out of it. God bless you and your family. Thanks for sharing that.
So sorry for your loss...he was a national treasure from "The Greatest Generation."
In 19 years, I’ve seen and heard a lot of horrific things, but last month I had my heart ripped out by a 5y/o. After we called DOA on the parents, my supervisor called me next door to check on the kids. The 5 y/o looked up as his older sister was talking to LE and said “He killed my mommy and daddy. I have nowhere to live.” Rips your heart out. But there are happy times in EMS too. It’s not all bad. I had two Cardiac Arrest saves in a month several years ago, and that is also something that will stay in my head. Unfortunately we don’t get as many of those back as I wish we did, but like a lady told me, if God wants them, there is nothing you can do about it. But I do want to thank you John for including EMS. Keep up the great work.
Bratton Arnette : I was under the impression we were talking about graveyard humor. Glad I didn’t see any here.
Sabre Tom I was explaining why EMS has graveyard humor.
The part that bothers most new people is finding out the hard way that you can do everything right and people still die.
Thank you
As a paramedic, I have to say to give a shoutout to ER nurses. Most of them can keep up with the best of us.
Lol not all ER nurses are created equal.
Rolled in a little old lady who fell face first into a concrete park bench, caved in her face... As I'm telling the triage nurse what we've done, I mention that she's bleeding from her eyes, and that i think her dentures have broken and she interrupts and demands to know why I didn't remove them. She stomps over as I tell her that her face is a broken mess, but her airway is fine, she fishes in this lady's mouth grabs the broken dentures pulls them out with this bloody spaghetti looking shit that I can only assume to be sinuses, drops them on her face and runs off to puke...
An ER doc hears us laughing and asks where the triage nurse went, and all that came out was "I think she had spaghetti for lunch"... 😂
You're exactly right! I'm also an ER nurse and it warms my heart to no end when some sweet innocent looking female ER nurse cracks the darkest joke in the midst of cops and EMT. The looks on their faces....
While taking care of a man in the E.R. years ago, after he had been run over by a car. The man suddenly convulsed really hard, and puked straight into the air, what looked like a whole lot of spaghetti. Some of that, being deflected by his E.T. tube holder, goes sideways and lands in the hair of a fellow Respiratory Therapist's "big hair". She started running and squeeling etc,,, and I looked across the patient at the Doctor and said, "I wonder what they've got for lunch down in the cafeteria", and he looks at the patient, now covered in his own puke and says, "for some reason I've got a hankerin for spaghetti". A second or two later, the guy convulses again with the same result. A huge amount. So, I look at the Doctor again and say, "looks like they've got some kind of an all you can eat deal going on wherever this guy had lunch".
Sean-s k-baunis sounds like the patient surely was trying hard to.
@Turquoise Cheetah You gotta do better than that weak shit.
Turquoise Cheetah the ones laughing aren’t the ones fucking up. It’s more likely the over confident I know it all types that are super serious all the time.
Maybe the one running away and shrieking is more culpable?
Turquoise Cheetah lack of compassion? If you refer back to the story, while the respiratory therapist ran out of the room abandoning the patient, who was left bedside and tending to the patient? That’s right, the man that “lacks compassion”. Fuck off.
An Engineer (12B type, not the slide rule type) teaching my Master Breacher class said, "Remember, if you screw this up, a fine red mist feels zero pain."
I mean, he wasn't wrong!
Irishman to William Wallace: "God tells me He can get me out of this, but he's pretty sure you're fooked!"🤣🤣
Minuteman4Jesus I would say that, but I’m training to be a chaplain and that won’t go over well 😂😂😂
Ha. I just commented this. I should known there was no way I was the first to remember this gem.
STEPHEN IS MY NAME!!!
“In order to find his equal, an Irishman is forced to talk to God” - Stephen “The Irishman”. 😉
Favorite movie line ever!
Thanks for the message, John. 24 years in EMS taught me the principles of Body Substance Isolation (BSI, gloves, mask, etc.). Unfortunately there is no way to isolate oneself emotionally from the horrors we experience as part of the job. Extreme Emotional Detachment works for those with no soul, and those devoid of empathy. The rest of us resort to gallows humor with mixed results. The best man from my wedding also worked in EMS. Late last year he took his own life. It was devastating for the entire EMS community. Caring for others takes its toll on a person, both physically and emotionally. I've sacrificed two knee joints, lumbar discs, and a 27 year marriage for my community. Exposure and exhaustion from the job has twice given me pneumonia, (the last time was very nearly fatal.) I contracted meningitis from a man who died from it and a slightly surly disposition from an up close and personal evaluation of the human condition.
And I laugh at inappropriate things. Like the sign posted by a coworker at quarters that read: "Sexual harassment at this location will not be reported, it will be graded."
Thank you for the message. Please keep up the good work.
Thank you for all your sacrifice and service to us all.
So sorry for your many sacrifices. It sounds so insignificant to say thank you for so many years of service, but Thank you! God Bless.
"Dark humor is like food: Not everybody hets it." - Jospeh Stalin.
You gotta proof read that badboy Butch.....
Huh?
Stalin was death incarnate so I see the dark humor in this
Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.
😂
Fire/Rescue, I assisted on a self-inflicted GSW to the head. after making it to the hospital I turned to a nurse in the ER and said “I just couldn’t see what he was thinking.” She just shook her head and walked away.
When I worked in the cemetery in college, we were given a lawn motor and told to go mow. I'll never forget one day having lunch a couple walking by, stopped with a look of horror. My coworker was sitting on a headstone having lunch. The couple said with disgust, "what are you doing!?"
He replied, "I'm having lunch with Grandma" 😮
I laughed way too hard at this 😂😂😂😂😂
Lolz
Lmao!
I seriously laughed out loud.. lol
That's pretty funny.
Retired Paramedic. I love it when someone asks if they're gonna die. My standard answer is, "YES" They didn't ask WHEN. So I didn't tell them
Asystole ....its a very stable rhythm
If it's wet and sticky and not yours...don't touch it.
Except on the weekends
I remember one of my fellow officers relating a call he responded to where a guy's throat was cut when he went through a plate glass window. He told me the guy looked like a "human Pez dispenser." I thought it was the funniest thing I'd ever heard until I repeated it at a family gathering and was informed, "That's not funny, Jerry."
I told a similar story a short while back at dinner with friends. One couple (retired LEO and Dispatcher) got it, my wife (retired LEO) and boys (well duh) got it; but the other couple (civilians)... well, let's just say I was reminded that not everyone sees the world in the same way. BTW, in my story the guy was only "mostly dead"... and the ensuing fight was... festive.
Jerry...that is funny
@@cougar2997
"This guy is only _mostly_ dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead, and all dead."
Anyone who can finish this is made of cool.
He stole that off of a movie
@@HuntingTarg Princess Bride quote. Lol.
It's like we say in the submarine community when asked how deep we can go.. "well.. we can go all the way to the bottom one time". 🤣
So I was at a social gathering when I mentioned that one of the best ways to go was to burn. The crispy critters are always smiling and waving. We ended up leaving, the wife was mortified. I think I was too hip for the room.
You nuked them lolz
LMAO... yeah, that's it... you are way too hip.
Oh my gosh. The fire department will love this
At a crash scene that resulted in a decapitation: "Some assembly required huh?"
Niteshift36 or that's not going to buff out, or they ain't putting Humpty Dumpty back together again. Former Deputy here.
@@davidenorth Former Deputy also..."Winner by a nose!"
You found the easiest 5-piece puzzle in the world.
missing a ................................. nope here it is .
Had a old woman freeze to death in her backyard, literally frozen to the ground. Ambulance rolls up and I'm like don't need you guys. There replie, "We're pretty good." I reply, "Not that good though."
My buddy once said in an ambush..."If i dont die today I will live forever with Olga!" ...we had a rolling joke in the legion. He's Russian and always joked that Russians joined the legion to get away from marrying a Olga. Lol
Was that his way of asking you to shoot him?
We had one guy we called "The Wiemanerian (pronounced "why-mannerian") Pig Fucker because he was always banging fat German chicks in Frankfurt. This was the early '90s when the Wall came down.
As a paramedic thanks for not forgetting us in EMS. 👋 My graveyard humor story: I just finished running my first code as a solo medic (the patient remained deceased) and my EMT partner went to fist bump me and told me, "killed it!"
John exercises social distancing by visiting a graveyard, which in itself is graveyard humor. 💀😂
It made the bad times worse...... That made them funny.
Give me hand will you, will pulling a body out of the rubble after bombing the hell out of it (Stinking). Then out of nowhere a hand hits me in the chest with a cartoon slap and drops into my lap. The longest 3 seconds of my life before someone giggles and we carried on as if nothing happened.
My wife and her coworkers (nurses) say "they're having cupcakes with Jesus" when a patient dies.
Yeah, sometimes you also want to die if you think about it.
That’s adorable. Lol
We like using the term "celestial discharge"
@@nieseba2 ours transferred to the ECU Eternal Care Unit
There's also a saying that "Nurses eat their own" so they can be a cruel breed altogether --- at least the female variety.
Done CPR hundreds of times at work. There is a lot of graveyard humor and talking about other things while we do our thing. It does help.
“Don’t worry buddy, God told me you wouldn’t have to eat another MRE in heaven”
😂😂😂😂
So the Devil introduced the Veggie Omelet to the US Army.
So, you have that going for you...
Do you get constipated in heaven? God I hope not.
Just curious, are MRE's that bad?
Keep laughing or start dieing. Trench humor is gods gift to the warriors tortured soul. It lets pressure off of the hell inside and out. It had to happen or worse thjngs happen.
Responded to a call some years back re: a guy who’d had a heart attack while in a bathtub. He’d apparently been in there for a few days. Without going in to specifics, we had to find a way to mentally disassociate from the tragedy. One guy called him “Stewie.” We cracked up. Unless you’ve been a cop or military you would never comprehend the graveyard humor.
My uncle told me a similar story about responding to a cardiac in a sauna, the guy had been in there all night, slow cooking.
Had a VERY similar situation but we called him “blew eyes” ... one blew this way, one blew that way 😂🤣
Joe Blow Yeah...you folks more than see your fair share of those things. I apologize for the omission.
I've been neither, but hail from a proud military and LEO family and I think it's hilarious. These comments are killer!
Of all the things I’ve seen, bodies that have been in water too long are hands down the worse. Nothing like grabbing them to have the skin slide off like an onion 🤢
5:17 "I'm not throwing rocks at a culture" you don't need to John they already do it to themselves😂😂
Even prior to my time in the Navy and my wife becoming a paramedic, this has always been my form of humor. You either have people that understand it or you get to see the shock value of it.
The shock value is pRiCeLeSs!
The image of Evan being consoled and carried away by John... “It’s ok, we can do this” literally killed me.
Something about being in uniform has warped my sense of humor when I’m around other uniformed people I know closely.
That was great! I work with a few prior service, and we get warped in our humor a lot.
Some of the best story tellers I have ever met I met while I was in the Marine Corps.
"Never point your gun at anything you don't want to destroy" John: Stares down barrel of a cannon.
If that cannon had a 140 year hang fire I bet Evan would have puked.
When they packed M18s on transport planes, they would put them in the rear so that in case they detonated, it wouldn’t hurt the crew’s ears.
I will NEVER apologize for having a sense of gallows humor. It has helped me get through a lifetime of hardship.
My Oma lived through WW2 Berlin and she had a great dark and self effacing sense of humor about it all. I always respected that.
Life has taught me that God thinks irony is hilarious and his sense of humor is often darker than mine.
But I should expect no less, The Lord is a warrior and his name is the Lord.
my absolute DEEEEEPEST RESPECT to the special breed....THANK YOU for caring about others
Sitting around the campfire with friends I told a funny anecdote from a call earlier that week. I later learned that everyone was traumatized to some extent from the story. People not on the job just don't understand.
You sh!t on thier bubble lolz
Traumatized from a story? Disgusted, angry, insulted....I could maybe see, but traumatized? Wow, a very large part of this country has become weak and pathetic.
@@hermesten1000 I'm joking, but I shouldn't talk about an 8 ball hemorrhage in mixed company.
@@sheepdog8395 Well, in mixed company some kind of adverse reaction should probably be expected. Fortunately about the worst reaction I get from my wife is something like "that's gross," accompanied by some funny faces, and insincere disgust....and that kind of reaction is far from any kind of deterrent, quite the opposite.
It has a way of culling the herd real quick.
When I or my siblings got hurt when we're were little kids, our dad would say, "You'll surely die after that." It freaked us out until we realized what he meant. Growing up with that warped since of humor has served us well through the years. Two police officers and one fireman in the bunch.
Heck my Dad was SRT(SWAT) and then was in charge of the homicide division, and my mom was an ER nurse. From the time I was born graveyard humor was our dinner talk.
I never had a chance to be normal.
My wife and I are retired law enforcement. I have two boys (16 and 12) and they don't really recognize dinner time without this kind of humor; almost always from their mom. No one really wants to be "normal", as normal accomplishes nothing. Sounds to me like you had an extraordinary upbringing and that is much better.
Cougar 299 I wouldn’t change it for the world. I’m 28 now and my 8 and 5 year old now share in my dark humor.
My wife just laughs and shakes her head.
True story: someone was signing off a FaceTime call, and said, “Any last words?”
“Right before I die, I’m gonna eat 400 unpopped popcorn kernels so the guy who cremates me gets scared.”
Hey private, just leave your foot locker unlocked, save us from having to cut the lock when we get back.
My favorite line to relieve the tension of the younger guys: “Relax; why die all tensed up.”
When this whole corona virus thing is over, we're all going to have a big laugh over it............well, some of us will. ;)
It's too late @NDNEWC. Soon there will only be 99.97 of us left
@@bobk1456 A lot of people after this pandemic will need supplemental oxygen. And if they laugh so hard their tubes come out and don't stop laughing... well lets call it 99.6.
This is why we sang "Blood on the risers" at Jump School.
My grandfather passed away early in the a.m. of 9/11. He was a salt of the earth type; always wore a smile, never met a person he didn't like, give you the shirt off his back type of guy. We were driving to his house when the plane struck the first tower. The compound effect of those two great tragedies was more than me or my siblings could really process without a little graveyard humor.
While our parents met to make funeral arrangements, we kids made jokes. We laughed, cried, and confirmed that if we were indeed going to hell, this would be the reason, but that laughter really helped us.
Come on now John. You know Graveyard Humor is a dead issue.
J Hutch it isn’t an issue in the first place.
I'm mortified!!!
@@CentauroVII That was the joke.
J Hutch well aren’t I slow.
At least he was Army, not Corps.
It was also true in my 26 years in Corrections, State Prison, we were, and still are when we see each other, very "sick".
"Wanna see a dead body?" Always gets a chuckle no matter how many times you experience it
I remember at airborne school the black hats telling about our reserve chutes. If that reserve chute don’t open up, airborne, you’ll have the rest of your life to figure it out.
Telling the NEW guy, "Wow, this looks dangerous. You go first!".
When I worked for the ME's [Office of the Medical Examiner's], field investigations were sometimes very sad and upsetting. To release the tension, we would use this type of humor.
Accurate, if you can't stare in the face of death and crack a joke you're in the wrong profession.
Thanks for this video. Helps me feel like I'm not the only one. I'm not military, police, or EMS. I'm a tradesman. While I don't get shot at regularly for work, I still deal with stuff that will kill you before you even realize you're getting killed. An abundance of dark humor is found on our jobsites. I noticed a long time ago that the things that actually make me laugh are very dark and bleak. My wife doesn't understand, and at times will get pretty damn mad when I crack a joke about "something that isn't funny," but it's quite literally a coping mechanism for me. She's come to sort of understand it, but it still makes her uncomfortable most times. Good to know I'm not alone!
Yeah, being both military and EMS, I've gotten my fair share of "holy crap did he just say that" looks from friends and family. We don't mean to sound horrible, but you have to find humor in the terrible in order to cope with it.
Before stepping out on a mission, my element lead said, "Hey Cajun! If you don't make it back, can I have your stereo?"
Being a hospital pharmacist this is a standard part of my job! What's always hilarious is that department management types in healthcare rarely understand or approve of such humor because it doesn't follow all of the feel good official mission statements of the hospital but it's high stakes/high stress stuff that we do and you can either laugh or you can be a ball of stress and anxiety.
I’ve been working in emergency departments for the last few years. It’s pretty much universal in this setting too, among docs, nurses, techs - everyone. People who have a problem with it never last long.
“I just want people to save money..”
John: “well these people can’t.”
*points out to the graveyard*
I WHEEZED
Right on brother. Thank you for addressing the topic of graveyard humor, also known as gallows humor. I am a military veteran and a former firefighter. I also have friends in law enforcement and have worked in joint incidents with law enforcement. You are 100% true that graveyard humor is part of the glue that binds members of these groups together. I have observed that each of these groups are a true brotherhood/sisterhood within the group. They share the same unshakeable belief in themselves and each other. They perform heroic deeds, not for themselves, but for their brothers and sisters. There is a deeply held ethos in each group that I will have your back because I know you have mine. Unfortunately, I don't see the same respect and commitment between these groups. I have participated in many incidents where two or more groups were working the same incident. It too often became a contest between groups rather than a mutual commitment to get the job done. An example is that on many incidents each participating agency would hold its own "classified" briefing, excluding representatives of the other groups. I remember an occasion where I saw a poster in a law enforcement office that said "The reason God made police officers is so that firefighters would have someone to look up to". Perhaps that is another example of graveyard humor, but I find it disturbing that these groups who are so bound together within themselves are suspicious of, and sometimes outright hostile to, other groups who are also working to the same goal of saving lives, property, and providing security. Come on guys and gals, work together and respect each other. You are all fantastic, have the same core values, and same goals.
(lady w/ GSW) "AHHHHHHHHH"
(medic) "ma'am don't worry...its just a flesh wound."
(lady w/ GSW) "HAHAHAHAHA"
During a particularly wicked firefight where we were trying to take cover behind pebbles, the corpsman screamed at his Marines to put those cigarettes out because "THOSE DAMN THINGS WILL KILL YOU!!"
While my Dad, Brothers and I were choosing a coffin for my dead mother; I was doing stand-up for the funeral director and his lovely assistant. I understand the entire dynamic of the humor and morbidity cocktail all too well. My stepdaughter is a funeral director. When she drinks, she says stuff that'll curl your hair.
When I was in the Border Patrol, I found a decomposed corpse in the desert. So, I called it in.
Me: I have a dead body northwest of Gordon's Well.
Supervisor: Are you sure he's dead?
Me: Well, I honked the horn and he didn't get up.
I had a t-shirt back in the day, it said "It's a green thing, you wouldn't understand". I did thirty years in the Patrol, I get it. Just wondering if it's the same Gordon's Well, or if it's one of those "blue gate" things.
It cracked me up😂😂😂
So my Uncle passed away at the same time my wife was in labor. A few days later we were going to his funeral and we passed the cemetery he was going to be laid to rest in. My wife asked “How far from your grandparents is your uncle going to be?” Without skipping a beat I said “A tombstones throw away.”
Exactly. Thank you John! I was blessed to work with two Army colonels, then side by side with a retired major general who became my mentor and my best friend. As a corporate nurse at the time we were first responders to more than I could have imagined. He let me know that our humor was not only okay, but it was the essential valve on a pressure cooker. As an attorney for over 20 years now, I realize how that gentle but fierce general's attitude gifted me with salty wisdom and grit, yet essential smiles.
I have resolved that if I am ever in a car that runs off a cliff, I'm going to say, "Oops."
So, you're a Kennedy?
Ive found that this humor has helped get through some of the stuff I’ve seen as a volunteer firefighter. It has gotten me some dirty looks from people when I say something not thinking about who’s around me.
When I was in Afghan with the Seabees We would Entertain ourselves by finding a local with fingernail polish or other "clues" and point to our LPO And tell him fiki fiki while we touch the tips of our index fingers together. We would find his response of confusion and outrage hilarious 😂🤣😂🤣
First one that comes to my mind was on a house fire a few years ago, we're watching it, knowing it's beyond saving, we know there's bodies to remove and our safety officer is wandering around and he says "Hey! It kinda smells like barbeque! Where's the sauce?" and incident command chuckles and says "Sir, there's bodies in there" and the Safety replies "well there's gonna be another one if the chef doesn't bring me my gosh darn barbeque sauce!" and I couldn't help but laugh. It was 4 am, we watched that fire since 10 PM and it was incredibly refreshing to have some humor despite the situation
"Knock knock"
*Who's there*
"Not your husband... Also I'm sorry for your lost"
When I was in the base honor guard we ran on this stuff. The team would never cut up in front of a grieving family but that van ride to and from the cemetery could get pretty raw. Our motto was "We put the fun into funeral".
We didn’t throw rocks, we threw grenades. But hey, to each his own I suppose.
I am a retired Submariner, did a career change now work EMS. A wierd sense of humor is definitely a survival mechanism. Only those who work in these fields can understand. It isn't us being cold, it just let's us vent in a way that is bearable.
While I thought that I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die. ”
- Leonardo da Vinci
After 30 plus years in EMS as a medic, air medic, Fire Dept. I was in the military as a medic also but that was easy stuff. I have heard a lot of graveyard humor and it helped me get through the grind of seeing the worst stuff. I am now retired and when the night comes I still see dead people and remember all the crap I saw and dealt with for all those years. It never leaves you. When I was at work it was easy but now retired not so much. Great video John.
Graveyard humor ALWAYS comes out when your with your buddies........in a bar.
Guaranteed!!!
“Have no regrets. The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.” - unknown
From a retired RN
Vietnam vet friend of mine was shot 2 times in 'nam, both in the same engagement. He ended up killing his shooter which was a little vietnamese woman with a 03 Springfield rifle. You should hear some of the jokes he makes about this...
Let's....
Well, were waiting...…...lol.
@@WhoWouldWantThisName Don't wait too long. That's how she died! 🤣
@@TacticalTerry Haha, of old age?
Really appreciate this video. As an ER nurse and EMT for the last 30 year, graveyard humor gets you through the shift and the day!! Thanks for all your great videos!
That's kind of like an Army friend of mine told me 1 day when I die he wanted my paint horse. I freaked him out with my reply that he could have my paint horse only if he killed me. Otherwise he would have to ask my wife. He thought for a few minutes & then replied how do you want to die cause I don't want to talk to your wife. LOL
Been at it for almost 20 years. I have to be really careful how I joke around “normal” people. It’s kind of funny to see the looks one their faces when something slips past my filter
1:00 This makes me comfortable about the Flugaloo already.
You bastard! Flugaloo is *mine* 🤬
I prefer Boogaflu.
That's the first I have heard of that one. Are we really calling it that? It's starting to get appropriate. Not quite yet, but if this keeps up it could.
A story I will never forget took place about a year and a half ago.
We were called to the graveyard of a nearby town with our ambulance and an emergency physician. We were told the undertakter had collapsed on the graveyard and his apprentice was performing CPR.
We arrived and found the undertaker in cardiac arrest, at the entrance of the graveyard in his suit and tie, with the apprentice performing CPR as we were told.
We took over and continued advanced CPR for more than half an hour but didn't succeed in bringing him back and discontinued trying after his wife, whom his apprentice had called in the meantime, told us on the phone that her husband, our patient, had a severe heart condition.
Over here in Germany though, EMS isn't allowed to transport a patient after they've been declared dead and we couldn't just call the local undertaker because, well, he wasn't really able to do his job right now - or ever again.
So we decided to pick him up and carry him to the nearby chapel located on the graveyard - almost every graveyard here in Germany has one - and put him on the table where they usually display the coffin during the funeral.
We even took some medical suture and sewed his shirt, which we had cut open, back together and fixed his tie.
On our way out our physician turns to the rest of our team and, without a motion on his face says: "At least he's dressed for the occasion".
That was when we all started bursting into laughter on that graveyard and I'm probably going to hell for that - but it was a relief we needed.
I use it in the office and have slowly made my co-workers accept my type of humor🤣
EMS 28 years lots of Graveyard Humor in that time, We use to have a restaurant we could all hang out at, I should have recorded that place.
Im a paramedic. Had a girl with a dead baby hanging out of her once. After the call my partner started cracking jokes about red frog legs...I made the choice to laugh & let the humor push aside the sadness I felt over the gravity of the situation. It's a total coping mechanism. Thanks John! Love your stuff.
My brother and I loved our mom who passed away immensely- every year we call each other on that day and say (tongue in cheek) “happy anniversary!”
For God's sake use code WARPOET!
My Dad died two months ago from Kidney Failure because he wasn't able to get a dr's appt thanks to Covid. I remember my uncle told me, with the most serious look on his face, "don't worry, the kidney did its job... he won't be needing another transplant."
We all started laughing