I came to the comments to complain that this video needs FAR more turtle footage. If I saw a turtle at a job interview, it would have my full attention and I would likely start off the interview by asking if he’s friendly and likes pets and if so can I pet him please what’s his name what’s his favorite food can I feed him Might work for an interview for a job working with turtles…
Exactly! She didn't even LOOK DOWN at Master Oogway! And Oogway would be the easiest one to acknowledge and greet for me personally since animal body language is a lot less overwhelming than human body language! Master Oogway is a blesséd soul who must be greeted also!
Master Oogway really gets around, I was very impressed by his speedy travels! How could you not say hello?! He even **walked over to her** and she didn't say hi.
@jeffbrownsclassroom and you can see why, and empathize with a normal human inclination to congregate with folks who see the world through the same lens as us... And also say "no, diversity brings troubles and strife, it's hard sometimes, but we know that trekking through those tiny, huge, social hardships makes groups more creative, more resilient, and just better, so get over yourself." Which is... arguably, marginally easier to say than to do 🤣
Look, it really isn't about any prejudice anyway, of course there isn't any, I have lots of neurotypical friends so I don't mind them at all, but with something like teaching it just makes them completely unsuitable for the job, if they can't infodump to the class then how on earth could they teach properly? The students wouldn't learn anything, and students would probably find the constant eye contact offputting and distract from the learning, so I just have to turn down the neurotypicals from the job although I'm sure they are fine people usually
@@theduchessofdarknessofficial Yeah it was fully a joke lol, and ik, that's kinda part the punchline - getting rejected a job because you make too much eye contact and such
I want your favorite awesome random facts! I'll start: Kangaroos start out with two vag*nas (censoring anatomical term because youtube hates science lol) and develop a third one after they get pregnant
@@ItsAsparageese 😮 🤩Nature is so amazing! My random awesome fact of the moment: it took homo sapiens sapiens several thousand years to develop the use of 90° angles in architecture. There's sites in Syria where you can see the entire development in the archaeological strata
@@nyarparablepsis872 Ooh interesting lol, I imagine because a whole structure has to be square if you're gonna use that theme pretty much anywhere ... I'll have to look more into that, thanks for the info!
Neurodivergent: this is a time i felt not great Neurotypical response: do you feel better now? Did you stop feeling not great? Neurodivergent response: this is a time i also felt not great! It was so awful! I'm glad we can relate on how unsavory the human experience can be sometimes :)
I genuinely feel like this is an American thing (I'm not American but my American colleagues have really had to dial it down in order to not be ostracised here, and they were popular smiley etc back in America) because as an AuDHD person I don't have problems with forced positivity & small talk in my country
@@sfmaslfkasl Yeah American culture leans towards allistic behavior, unfortunately. Or like, allistic people have less difficulty than we do (not saying they have none, I’m saying relative to autistic people)
Isn't it a tortoise? Anyway, I would have spoken directly to the tortoise and become fixated by its passage around the table - so much easier than looking and speaking to people!
@@dragonscale46Tortoise are slow. If you saw a turtle running you would understand the difference. Also yeah I realised after you said it is indeed a tortoise(I didnt really look at it when I said the comment assuming they knew difference between turtle and tortoise big mistake) but doesnt change that tortoises are slower than turtles. But for a tortoise it is fast.
@exosproudmamabear558 that’s a normal speed for a tortoise. Tortoises are a lot faster than a lot of people think. Maybe not as fast as some other turtles, but still quick when they want to be. Evidence: ua-cam.com/users/shortsvZ86Eao5J54?si=G0RsQcVTWaMtRNhs Also all tortoises are turtles.
@@colleenwilliams1689 yay! It's a big issue across the gap! Neurodivergent people often like to share a similar experience, as a way to relate to the story being told. But neurotypicals can take this as trying to change the conversation to being about yourself when they're sharing something going on with them.
Me too! I would love a place where I wouldn't be bothered with constant interactions, small talk, eye contact, etc., I could just be like the lady doodling. And I'm quite a social person in that I like company, but I like to keep to myself, I listen but I can't sit still and keep eye contact, and that the other person keeps to themselves, but we just share the space together. 🤷♀️
I was diagnosed autistic in first grade. I was able to sell being Neurotypical well enough during my job interview for my last retail job, but not actually during the job itself. I liked that job because the whole job was helping people. I did my job well because I cared about the care our customers received. But management didn't like me because even though I did the job of customer care well, if they wanted something done on the cleaning/maintenance side of things, they had to tell me first. Other employees, management could just leave them to their own devices and they'd 'find something to do to keep useful' but with me, my brain doesn't work that way. If you don't tell me something needs done, I'm not gonna know to do it, and I'm not gonna seek out something to do without being told to. But when they did tell me, I tried to put just as much effort into whatever job they told me needed done. With that being said, most people aren't anywhere near 100% efficient at work, with a good chunk of your time being spent either in transit (moving from one place to the next), in contemplation (thinking about what work you've done, what needs done, what order to do work in, etc.), or in upkeep (eating or using the bathroom). So when they fired me saying that out of the 100 hours I clocked over the last month, 3 of the hours during that time I spent clocked in but not actually working, I was surprised they'd fire someone for being 97% efficient when normally people are less efficient than that. Normal people will be clocked in despite not working for an even greater amount of time than that if my coworkers were anything to go by, so I'm convinced they just wanted to get rid of me in a way that I wouldn't be able to be hired again since they didn't wanna deal with having to tell me what to do all the time, no matter how good at my job I actually was. If I were to put it in a metaphor, they had me, a sharp knife that did the job well but management had to sharpen regularly in order to utilize, and then they had a dozen other duller knives that did the job worse but were autonomous and didn't require sharpening, and they chose to throw away the sharp knife. How these people's minds work, and how they keep companies running with this attitude, I'll never understand.
I feel you.. though I am hsp not autistic, I've been having similar problems. Through many different jobs, I've learned that if you want to be seen as a 'good employee', you need to intentionaly let others see how hard you work, and put a lot of emphasize on the 'show'. Which is exactly the reverse of what I am and my ways, coz I like to do the job as best as I can, and It is the thing I concentrate on, not on the showing and telling everyone how much I've done, and so on:/ but if you do not rub it in in their faces, they automaticaly presume that you are not doing your job, or that you do it poorly and lazing around.. one of the worst things for me is to market myself, so well.. let's say I struggle;)
I am very bad at telling my coworkers what I did and yes, the result is, they think I am lazy. I would love a manual on how to "rub it in their faces" 😂 Because it is so true, that's what they want 😮🙈😅
Ah yes the neurodivergent job experience. You put in way more work and skill than your neurotypical peers who barely do anything, but if you get caught doing something “abnormal” you’re viewed as the worst worker ever.
I quit my last job because I wasn't being given enough work. I was finishing my tasks far ahead of schedule and never had complaints about my actual work. After continually asking to be given more work I was told I needed to work more hours first to prove myself.
I (with probably ADHD) literally just had an interview and the interviewer and I both kept getting sidetracked and off topic. I straight up at one point asked “so how much ADHD you got?” when he asked if I have any questions. He laughed with me abt it. I’ve never clicked with an interviewer so much, I’m honestly really excited.
Person: I had a negative experience/feeling. Neurotypical display of empathy: Apology, sympathetic remarks, express desire for negative state to be temporary Neurodivergent display of empathy: share a similar type of negative feeling-experience to demonstrate a personal understanding of how the other person is feeling, the sharing is evidence of thoughtfulness and proof of empathy rather than assumption It’s unfortunate that the neurotypical view is that we don’t have empathy. The sharing is a demonstration of active listening. When we display empathy to fellow neurodivergent people, the result is catharsis. It evokes feelings of “I’m not alone,” and “This person gets me.” That builds connection, emotional intimacy, which is important for healthy relationships. But when we display empathy to neurotypical people, we are often told we are selfish and uncaring and rude and make everything about ourselves. Perhaps those who would say that should think of a time when they said something intending to be positive and supportive, but someone else took it the wrong way and assigned malicious intent to them.
YES! YT's algorithm recommended a video to me earlier that asserted the way I show empathy is a "charisma killer" that employs "conversational narcissism" and "unsolicited advice." When a loved one shares their negative experience, I share my own to let them know they're not alone and I'm here to help them get through difficulties together. And if something worked for me, I'll offer it as a potential solution. How is it narcissistic to highlight commonalities in the human experience and want to offer solutions? Isn't it less empathetic to say a curt, "I'm sorry, I hope that gets better," without engaging in the distressing issue and offering support to work through it? I was feeling really bad about myself after watching that, but this video and the comments have helped a lot. Thank you!
I’ve come to find I am different in wanting to feel listened to and heard. I have had so many people claim they understood me, but they didn’t and were cramming me into a box based on assumptions and their ultimate message belittled my experience. Like waving away concerns or calling something I’m doing a phase I’ll get over.
That's a display of "I know what that feels like" which does have an air of empathy to it. As in, you think of how you would feel in a similar situation. That's step one of empathy and usually internal (attunement). However, according to the empathy experts (Marshall Rosenberg and Brene Brown), it's still an empathy miss because empathy is about listening and reflecting understanding of *their* experience.
@@LKaempen how did you perceive the turtle then? I'm assuming you don't see a turtle in the interview room everyday right? You would've had your thoughts or feelings about it, right? Would you just not state them as some form of politeness? I mean they explicitly introduced him, so acknowledging it wouldn't have been rude, impolite or weird. Isn't realizing that a social cue? No offense, but this is why don't get this ND people and social cues cliché. In this video there were so many that flew over her head. Like how they wanted her to react to the quotes. I wouldn't have recognised them either, but I would've asked, if I wouldn't have felt anxious, which I can't say yet. And what's all this feigned enthusiasm worth if the words are so so empty? She likes to travel only to tell other people about it? What? Didn't even name a single country she's visited. Is that really so ND to find her unapproachable? Genuine question, no judgement, sorry if it sounds like that, btw.
I act just like the interviewee in interviews, but I'm just masking. I taught myself to do that to have a better chance of getting the job. I would have definitely asked a lot of questions about the turtle though!
And then I go home and take a nap. I get the job! But a couple of months later it becomes clear what an abject disappointment I am as an employee because I never remember to say, "Good morning," to people, and I can't figure out whether to follow the handbook versus the contradicting verbal instructions (Is it neither? Or somehow both?)
@@Lobotomobillionaire I'm the one automatically telling people, "Me, too" after they say, yes, they also have or do something I've already info dumped about.
NT: small talk is how you establish trust, because crazy and dangerous people cant talk about the weather. ND: so if i can talk about the weather you're making positive moral assumptions about me? Arent serial killers really good at faking that stuff to get close to strangers? NT: why are you talking about serial killers?
Oh I felt that in my bones! 😂 "I'm not taking about serial killers! What part of I'm using that to demonstrate an important point don't you get? I'm talking about the point/principle. What I use to illustrate it is not the focus." NT's often seem to miss a point or principle by getting distracted by the topic of a part.
That, and small talk is something anyone can do with the bare minimum emotion or even faked or misleading intent. Talking about something more meaningful establishes actual trust and interest in talking with a person because it shows that you're willing to share something more personal with them. Someone who has malicious intent wouldn't want to do that, why would they want to share personal interests or experience with someone they dislike? But ofc NTs will see this as being weird or even selfish!
I worked as an elementary school teacher with autism. It was very difficult. I started at a school that understood my diagnosis and went out of their way to assist me (and I honestly regret leaving). My second school was hellish. My principal actually told me, to my face, that she thought I was too mentally slow to be a teacher. When I asked her if she remembered I had autism, she went white as a sheet. She never spoke to me again while I worked there (which was only a month longer) and did everything in her power to get me fired. I quit before she could. But yeah, be careful neurodivergent teachers, some administration will actively try to get rid of you while simultaneously pretending to be inclusive. Oh and that second school I worked at was a title one school that worked with autistic and special needs kids. So the fact that the principal could be that cruel to a member of her staff that had the same condition was unforgivable. I honestly didn’t even get into the stuff I went through working for that horrible judgmental woman. I quit teaching forever due to that experience.
I'm so sorry that you were treated so horribly, It's those kind of experiences that make me want to train more schools. I've been traveling to schools training them about ND kids and staff.
It is terrible to hear that you went through that. I was harassed at a job for other reasons but I went the legal route. It is not comfortable, but it prevents others from going through the same experience. Additionally, you're eligible for unemployment if they fire you, which is why they try and make you quit, so it saves their organization money. Even without a lawsuit, unemployment can give relief and breathing room to find a new job where you are treated as you deserve to be treated.
Wow, I was very amused by this and also sad to know what a common experience this is for so many of us. Before I knew about my neurodivergence, I just assumed I was grossly incompetent compared to those around me, even though on paper I was just about "as impressive." I lose hope sometimes that I'll find a profession where I "fit." A kind neighbor of mine, who I suspect may also be neurodivergent, is an instrument repairman. He let me tag along to some of his jobs. The thought of entering a space to perform a service on my own terms and then promptly leaving sounds about as ideal as work can get, so I hope I can learn more.
my family has an heirloom violin, and we had to take it to be repaired a few times, the repair shop we took it to was so magical looking! all these colorful vials of mysterious liquids, jars of stuff, etc. I've concluded that instrument repair is 1. a form of wizardry and 2. a career only a neurodivergent person would truly excel in. I wish you the best of luck if you decide to be an instrument repair wizard!
I’m a machine tech (most of the time, jobs in machine shops means many hats, hah) and a lot of people in that line of work are very neurodivergent! Most of my coworkers are unabashedly neurospicy in some shape or form, and it comes in handy in our line of work because having the ability to take experience with one kind of machine and extrapolating that laterally onto other machinery is valuable. I often get the impression that many folks in the repair field are neurodivergent because of this, as well as the intricacies of parts and processes - and how particular every single tech I meet is, lol. A very opinionated bunch we are 😂
As an autistic person who's been jobless since I finished my university 1,5 years ago... I feel this pain so, so much. I always knew this was going to be the case and dreaded it... I'm the most depressed I've ever been. And the most fun part is that when I used to have a job back in the day, constant masking makes you so tired that it's like you are working 3 jobs at once but only get paid for one. No masking equals being ostracized. Im registered as unemployed and the lady at the office doesn't understand why it's so hard for me to get a job.
I understand that stress. No matter how talented , skilled, knowledgeable in the work I performed in the midst of NT work places, the stress of masking was exhausting. Perform too high and their social status or ego is threatened. That creates stress for them. Performing below your personal standards is stressful for you. I've always worked best when working for myself, untethered by the constraints of unwritten NT work rules. Might be best to not limit yourself by working for someone else.
Holy shit you put it into words. I can do carpentry and be on my feet 7+ hours a day and I'll have bit of back pain or muscle aches sometimes, but I'm generally fine. Put me in a customer service job or have to be surrounded by other (very talkative and younger) students and I am exhausted. It does feel like working 3 jobs
I kinda wish job interviews were done like a normal conversations. It would be less stressful. I hate the very structed conversation when my working memory SUCKS and I forget what I was supposed to say. Also, the dog infodumping is so real. I have to stop myself or I'll talk for AGES. I usually either write no comments on UA-cam or absolute essays. There's no in-between. I'd say it kinda is like that in real life. I may never start a conversation but if you start one with me I either will be slightly uncomfortable because it's a topic I don't enjoy much so I don't know much about it or I'll love that topic and I could talk with you about it for 3 hours straight.
I was in several interviews on company side and actually, being casual and direct was very positive, not only to me but also my colleagues. It depends!!!
Whenever I was the interviewer, I did more casual style interviews. I found them helpful, cause I got to know the real person and I also found them less stressful! Win-win
Same, the only good interview I've ever had was with a manager at a pet supply store who framed it like a friendly conversation, asked me questions about my passion for animals, & was like - 'you'll be perfect for this!' Sadly, I found out that I had been passed over when the next week, I was there doing my job at an adoption event with my local cat rescue, & saw a bunch of new hires being shown around the store...probably because they could already work a cash register etc, like always... But still! I wish all interviews were like that!
The only thing I would add is this: “Did you notice how much she smiles?” “Oh, yeah, that was super weird!” “Even after you said you’d been sick.” “Yeah.” “What was she smiling about? Job interviews aren’t fun!” “Yeah, it was like she wasn’t taking this seriously.” “I’ll be honest, I felt like it was about me. I don’t think I can work with someone who’s secretly laughing at me, like in their head. Not again.” “Right, right, that’s the worst.” “Smiling for no reason is so toxic.” Also I’ve subscribed.
I always have the impulse to share a story about a similar bad experience when someone else is having a hard time but then it always becomes "way to make it about YOU." I no longer share anything in fear of getting that reaction... but now when someone confides in me I don't know what to say which seems just as bad.
I feel bad because I do this too, but I get very frustrated with my parents (both undiagnosed but almost certainly also ND) who also do it. I've come to realize there's a difference between telling a short story and explicitly relating it back to the person with "so I can/can't imagine how hard x must be" (depending on how similar my experience was), and derailing the entire conversation to talk about my problems. 😅 I've been learning to catch myself before I derail conversations. It doesn't always work because some people will never appreciate the attempt, but it feels like a better compromise to me than just completely suppressing myself.
I feel bad because I do this too, but I get very frustrated with my parents (both undiagnosed but almost certainly also ND) who also do it. I've come to realize there's a difference between telling a short story and explicitly relating it back to the person with "so I can/can't imagine how hard x must be" (depending on how similar my experience was), and derailing the entire conversation to talk about my problems. 😅 I've been learning to catch myself before I derail conversations. It doesn't always work because some people will never appreciate the attempt, but it feels like a better compromise to me than just completely suppressing myself.
Wow I've never watched anything that illustrated so clearly the ND/NT divide. That disconnected, performative, AI speak the NT's do with all the inflections and smiles and eye contact is so robotic. 😮
I overly research about job interviews cos it stresses me out to no end. I always make a script and feel like I have to pretend to be a robot 😅 it’s so odd that a robot is what they want
@@summero-my5in Yep, I had to teach myself to do it. I overheard coworkers complain that I don't say, "Good morning," or ask them irrelevant personal questions. I was 28 and that was my first clue I was "supposed to" do that. Another time, I read a book that discussed the cultural practice of (women mostly) giving reciprocal compliments on attire ("I love your shirt!" "Oh thanks, your scarf is adorable, where did you get it?" -- I don't wear scarves, but apparently that doesn't matter). Anyway, I tried it out on the grouchy payroll secretary, to very good effect! She was always helpful to me and never grumbled at me after I started doing that. I also almost got fired one time for failing to recognize a supervisor's suggestion (He said, "I suggest.... ") as a direct order. Another boss got annoyed with because I didn't use the word processor he liked, but did not require. I need people to just tell me what I need to do, because I do not speak Hint-ish.
"AI speak" -- Interesting. Does the text generated by AIs sound so artificial in part because it mimics neutrotypical responses? To me such attempts to sound friendlier come across as insincerity.
The hardest question to answer for me has always been, "Where do you see yourself in five years." Dude, I'm still bracing myself for what you might say five minutes from now, I can't plan for five years.
Standard interview questions you can train yourself for & cater to what the interviewer wants to hear. This particular question is an invitation to talk about a possible future career with the people you’re being interviewed by. And trust me, NT people also prepare their responses in this canned way- it’s expected. (Ps I learned this from a Matt Rose video)
Whenever I hear anyone ask me about my Five Year Plan, I think of Soviet Russia, and grow anxious. Suddenly, it feels more like an interrogation than an interview.
I was introduced to a new colleague yesterday. I hated it. I literally said "I'm nice". I'm 40 years old. How am I not better at this by now. I was also introduced "as kind of a hermit". I mean, it's true, but damn.
@SeveralGhost Thank you. From now on, I will remember your comment any time that awkward situation pops into my mind (which based on past experiences, will be a lot in the years to come). Thank you for a different point of view 😊
🐢TORTOISE! 🐢 "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present." A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo. Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️ Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae. "Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱 And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄 "There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢 The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤ Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵 "We called him tortoise because he taught us." 👩🏫🐢 Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides. 😡🙄🙂☺️ "The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself." 🙏 Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
This I so incredibly relatable… I really would love working with other neurodivergent people. That way I won’t feel self-conscious about the way I converse…
🐢TORTOISE! 🐢 "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present." A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo. Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️ Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae. "Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱 And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄 "There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢 The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤ Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵 "We called him tortoise because he taught us." 👩🏫🐢 Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides. 😡🙄🙂☺️ "The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself." 🙏 Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
It looks like the camera angle of the interviewers was either blandly or coldly color graded or it had no color grading which contrasts the warmer look of the interviewee’s angle. Interesting creative choice. I also like that the interviewers have movie posters behind them and they kept making references
Awww I love the part about Jerry, I love dogs, my girls are Avery (her full name is Avery "Mouse" Lee though) and Pantera (known mostly as Pants or The Wugget), Pants is 14 and she's a cattle dog mix and Avery will be 13 in a couple of months and she's a pyrenees mix and they're really smart and Avery used to climb fences and trees but now she doesn't try that stuff anymore since she's older (which I'd say is the only good thing about any dog getting old) so it's kind of funny because Avery was always the problem child (I called them "perfect child" and "problem child" for ages) but now that they're older they've totally reversed roles and Pantera is a troublemaker now lol she's started eating random objects out of nowhere (just a few weeks ago she puked up a cat toy from her brother's house!) oh and their brother is Butters, he's my ex's dog and we're all still best friends and we visit a lot (Avery is really the one who made us adopt him ("him" being Butters, not my ex)), he's probably a lab/pit/maybe rottie/maybe sharpei type of mix (also referring here to Butters and not my ex), just a big blocky butterbean (his full name is Butters Samuel Bean) and he's actually the sweetest of the three, he's really sensitive and gets anxious sometimes (we called it "getting agitatered" which became "tatered" and now when one of us is tatered about something we say stuff like "don't be a tater, be a bean!") and actually all three have a whole extensive array of nicknames with cute etymologies lol but omg I almost forgot to share that BUTTERS NURSES ON BLANKIES which is INSANELY CUTE, this blocky big 100-lb pibble-lookin' vanillabean nursing on a blankie to calm himself every day, especially when he has one of his hoodies on, it's the best, he's so cute, they're all such good dogs, well except Pantera sometimes now that she's in her Sassy Pants era lol, but anyway I really liked this video and I love dogs and Jerry sounds like a great dog and if anyone read this far then do you have a dog?
I don't have a dog. I have 2 cats, but I like dogs. Maybe if I had enough land and house I might have a dog too if my cats wouldn't hate it, but they probably would. Cats are Genie and Gidget, sisters, all grey. We got them from a shelter when they were about 8 months old. They're such sweeties. Gidget is definitely the smarter of the two, also more nervous. She will go hide if anyone comes to the house that doesn't live here. Genie is the not as bright cat that is sweet and social. Anyone comes to the house, she will think they came to see her in particular. Gidget is recovering from over grooming; probably from the stress of having my mother-in-law live with us for a while. My mother-in-law would not have anything to do with petting the cats or letting them on her lap, only insisted on feeding them, which I think confused poor Gidget greatly.
Thank you for telling us about your dogs! I don't have any dogs. I had a cat who was basically my life partner, she was so snuggle and purr, we knew each other so well, I could even ask her "show me" when I didn't understand her and she'd show me what she wanted (half the time, it was to take a nap with me XD). I lost her a few months ago and it's been really hard. I started volunteering at a cat shelter, though, and I asked to foster their meanest, fussiest cat, and when I brought her home her personality suddenly changed completely! She's now so wonderfully sweet and purry. I learned so much from my old cat how to make this cat feel comfortable and happy and how to help with her medical issues, it's a balm. I still really miss my old cat, though. I love them both so much, even though they'd probably dislike each other intensely (my old cat always hated cats, though she liked dogs).
What is truly interesting is that neurodivergent individuals communicate better with other neurodivergent people, than neurotypical individuals communicate with other neurotypicals
@jeffbrownsclassroom oh, no, I meant an online school both run by neurodivergent staff and serving neurodivergent students I figure it might be more enjoyable for neurodivergent students, since a virtual classroom wouldn't involve the sensory distractions and if another student is messing with you, you can just remove them from your vision and hearing
@@MawdyDevIt's not a bad idea, but I worry it would be kind of isolating. I may not have high social needs, but some neurodivergent people do. This idea might cause similar issues as traditional homeschooling where students often feel isolated and just different than other students due to the lack of public socialization.
@@callmepiee2009 my idea was for a virtual classroom, the student would effectively be sitting at a virtual desk with the ability to see the models of their classmates and hear what their classmates say. If another classmate is being distracting, they can opt to remove the other student from their sensory input, but by default everyone would be visible and audible Edit: the models wouldn't have to actually look like the students, of course.
Oh goodness! It's been so hard to try unlearning the "reciprocal communication style" thing. I never realized it was considered rude or self-centered. I thought I was communicating that I could relate, without going captain obvious with, "oh I can totally relate" surface level blah
I haven't been diagnosed but I know I'm neurodivergent, I either have ADHD or autism, or both, and I'm planning on going for a diagnosis. Funny thing is I try to mask and do a terrible job of it. I for example make small talk about the weather and share a bunch of statistics like the record high and low and averages for that date and then a bunch of other records for that month. Or some kind of event going on space-related and I go on an impressive tangent. I love to talk about space stuff so much I forget to swallow when talking. I'm so thankful the interview process went smoothly for the jobs I have, I work at a planetarium and also do astronomy-related independent research. I suppose it's a field where a lot of us reside. Sometimes I like to joke that I'm an alien from another planet studying Earthlings as my real job. -I hope nobody discovers my secret, haha-
I thought it was so funny that at the time you were talking about things being awkward, the turtle was awkwardly slipping into the crack as he walked 😂
I loved Mrs Darris when I was in school, she's an incredible english teacher and helped me feel more comfortable in class when I came out as trans. Love the video!
I would accept defeat at the part with dog info dump. It would break my expectations of this social activity and require me to spend more energy than I had anticipated. I can completely understand where the interviewer comes from, but this is a job interview, I wired my brain to do the business talk and caught up on my formal expressions, prepared my part of the dialogue, and then you suddenly jump to semi-friendly dog talk? Get me out X) It's nice to compare the experiences, because, even in differences, I can relate to these people. Thank you for the video!
Why didn't they see the interviewee was masking? I don't know what she was like behind the mask, but it was obviously a mask. That's why when I am interviewing I do my best to have at least some time during the interview where the interviewee doesn't have their mask up as much. (Since I'm in computer science, that usually involves sticking an interesting problem in front of them and watching/listening to them work it out) And I know staring at people can make them feel awkward, but how can I understand what makes them tick If I don't watch them? I don't make eye contact to seem trustworthy - I grew up with cats! I make eye contact because I am watching the facial micro gestures. I am very good at pattern recognition. Admittedly, if I were being interviewed, I would probably have changed my technique when I saw my eyes were making them nervous, but I probably still would have gone back to staring as soon as I needed to read body language again. 🙃 Now, not enjoying the movie quotes would definitely be a problem culture-wise. As a person who doesn't watch the same movies as others, I definitely didn't enjoy being surrounded by people doing movie quotes constantly at a previous job 😂
Yeah I'm a masking autistic myself which is why i do more eye contact then the other two interviewers who are just acting autistic. Didn't want to muddy the waters to much with this but you may like my video on masking here: ua-cam.com/video/nCRIM7LVlYs/v-deo.html
Thankyou. 😊🙌 I was wondering how long the turtle worked at the school, and happy that movie quotes are an integral part of communication! also , I love that other humans try to relate by sharing experiences (good or bad) to show empathy, I thought it was just me. I would love to just be drawing and doodling when speaking with people, but I am not that brave.
Please don't judge and discriminate against a person just because you assume they have neurotypical disorder. She's human, too. And she can't help it, she was born this way. Show some sympathy for her, she's wasting countless hours of precious lifetime on small talk, while never being able to experience true joy while babbling on about an interesting topic for hours on end. At least give her a chance, maybe she'll learn to mask her disorder and to better fit in. If she really keeps staring into other peoples eyes, you can just fire her and instead hire someone who doesn't think society has to constantly cater to their special needs. (Jokes aside, I never realised talking about similar experiences was a neurodivergence thing. I thought it was normal to demonstrate you can relate to their suffering ...? 0_o )
QUOTES?! "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present." A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo. Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️ Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae. "Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱 And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄 "There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢 The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤ Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵 "We called him tortoise because he taught us." 👩🏫🐢 Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides. 😡🙄🙂☺️ "The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself." 🙏 Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
Is that a sulcata or a box turtle? Can I use comic books to teach English? Actually can I let the students teach me about their favorite books instead?
This is amazing. Really related to the "sharing experiences of being sick" as the natural and empathetic thing to do. (Or rather not do, in the NT world.)
As an AuDHDer I do wish these examples wouldn’t insist that “eye contact is a big nono for everyone” because you can also be on the opposite end of that spectrum, and I sometimes make neurotypical people uncomfortable with how much eye contact i make to show them “im definitely paying attention to you! Im being so attentive!” And sometimes it helps me actually concentrate on what they’re saying and remember it easier.
Totally get that. I'm an AuDHDer also and high masking. I tend to look people in the eyes too much. I didn't want to muddy the waters too much with this particular video but I did talk about it in this one on masking: ua-cam.com/video/nCRIM7LVlYs/v-deo.html And it will feature in future videos as well
Lol, as a neurotypical who works closely with a lot of neurodivergent people, this really made me laugh so hard. This is just like normal interactions between us all and I guess we're all just used to each other and don't realise how funny it is, lol.
makes me shutter to think that "professionals" actually sit around and rudely judge me about petty things like eye contact in the irrelevant setting of a job interview
Yes too all of that! The interview process as it stands is good if you want charming, chatty, outgoing people to fill your ranks. You're just going to be stuck trying to herd them back to their work tasks rather than socializing.
My sister just introduced me to this channel. Thank you! I’m an autistic high school math teacher. It’s so refreshing to find someone who gets it. Also, I talk about my dog like that.
This was just recommended to me and I loved it! Reading that you yourself are AuDHD makes me feel so much more comfortable because I am too! I'll be sharing around your videos and website!
I hate that the interviewee just sounds exactly like me during a job interview, despite me being autistic, because I mask just like that in order to get a job.
Yep. But we need to respect Master Ooway's body boundaries. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ No touching without consent 🐢TORTOISE! 🐢 "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present." A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo. Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️ Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae. "Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱 And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄 "There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢 The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤ Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵 "We called him tortoise because he taught us." 👩🏫🐢 Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides. 😡🙄🙂☺️ "The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself." 🙏 Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
I actually find eye contact to be rude because in my experience pointing your ear at someone makes it easier to hear them, which is a sign that you want to hear what theyre saying. Eye contact creates an arena where one can pretend to listen but not actually be by just nodding and making listening sounds, and that to me is disingenuous and disrespectful
@@jeffbrownsclassroom im not sure if it's true of all native cultures but in my tribe, the Smelqmix, and some other Salish tribes, we tend to have conversations side by side instead of while facing each other. It follows the same logic, that we are listening to each other, and that we are looking in the same direction. I think it's not just neurodivergent but also culturally important. I think we also have a tendency to react more when facing the person were trying to communicate with. We should be able to acknowledge our emotions but direct them away from other people so they can be released without gaining resentment. I think our energetic direction is a super important thing in terms of how we communicate - this is even true when training dogs, or leading groups of people. Often groups of people will follow your direction and the way you're walking. My dogs will often follow me off leash because I focus on my body direction and they pay attention to it even when they're out of my eyeline. They know from something deep in nature what the direction is, like some sort of magnetic thing. And I think it affects us more than we think too
@@jeffbrownsclassroom in my native tribe, the Smelqmix, and in other Salish tribes, we tend to have conversations side by side. I think we are trying to listen to each other talk while avoiding reaction by not facing one another. I think it's also a way of petitioning the Great Spirit to oversee our conversation and help us come to peace. We are releasing our concerns to the wind so we don't release them to each other, and I think it's the best way to communicate
🐢QUOTES?!! 🐢 "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present." A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo. Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️ Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae. "Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱 And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄 "There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢 The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤ Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵 "We called him tortoise because he taught us." 👩🏫🐢 Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides. 😡🙄🙂☺️ "The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself." 🙏 Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
I was asked in an interview what i didnt like about my previous job. I told what i didnt like (how i was terminated a week after handing me 401k paperwork). I was denied for talking negatively about my previous employer. Apparently i was just supposed to lie. Why even ask a question when every succesful answer is going to be a lie
yes unfortunately this is an area you are supposed to lie. Interviewing is a game that is focused on neurotypical social rules which is what frustrates me and so many of us. It's why I made this video.
It is definitely a bit of song and dance, unfortunately. When I was an interviewer, I often would ask this question to see if there were any immediate red flags such as a culture fit issue or if I felt like the reason they left is too similar to the kind of environment that my org would be. We also had someone who told us that they had been working in a job where they weren't doing anything for years and proceeded to demonstrate a skills gap that led us to passing on that candidate.
I didn't even realize the movie quote thing was like a neurodivergent thing. It's just something I do and every time someone catches the reference, an angel gets its wings.
The only truly unforgivable thing is that she didn’t show any interest in the turtle. She didn’t ask about him at all or even say hello to him!
as an autistic person i would have OPENED with the turtle. i want to know about master oogway. is he nice? does he like people? I NEED TO KNOW
@@kigut7443how often will I have the pleasure of working with Mr. Oogway if hired??
Likes dogs, but gives the turtle nothing?! Speciesist. Would not hire.
Hahaha 😂
I came to the comments to complain that this video needs FAR more turtle footage. If I saw a turtle at a job interview, it would have my full attention and I would likely start off the interview by asking if he’s friendly and likes pets and if so can I pet him please what’s his name what’s his favorite food can I feed him
Might work for an interview for a job working with turtles…
She didn’t even address the turtle in the room 😭
Exactly! She didn't even LOOK DOWN at Master Oogway! And Oogway would be the easiest one to acknowledge and greet for me personally since animal body language is a lot less overwhelming than human body language! Master Oogway is a blesséd soul who must be greeted also!
Master Oogway really gets around, I was very impressed by his speedy travels! How could you not say hello?! He even **walked over to her** and she didn't say hi.
very disrespectful, i would be immediately on to the next candidate
yep, i would have had far more interaction with the turtle than with the interviewers. 😃
I know!
"I'm not, like, prejudiced about neurotypicals, but sometimes they're a bad cultural fit for the team, that's just the way it goes sometimes 🤔"
Exactly what happens
@jeffbrownsclassroom and you can see why, and empathize with a normal human inclination to congregate with folks who see the world through the same lens as us...
And also say "no, diversity brings troubles and strife, it's hard sometimes, but we know that trekking through those tiny, huge, social hardships makes groups more creative, more resilient, and just better, so get over yourself."
Which is... arguably, marginally easier to say than to do 🤣
Look, it really isn't about any prejudice anyway, of course there isn't any, I have lots of neurotypical friends so I don't mind them at all, but with something like teaching it just makes them completely unsuitable for the job, if they can't infodump to the class then how on earth could they teach properly? The students wouldn't learn anything, and students would probably find the constant eye contact offputting and distract from the learning, so I just have to turn down the neurotypicals from the job although I'm sure they are fine people usually
@@NearlyInfinitythis is probably a joke but you guys know that jobs ask you to make eye contact or you don't get the job right
@@theduchessofdarknessofficial Yeah it was fully a joke lol, and ik, that's kinda part the punchline - getting rejected a job because you make too much eye contact and such
Man, maybe if these three interviewed me, I'd finally get a job.
Ditto!
Ughhh hard same 😅😭 I think we would vibe so well together.
I was thinking the same thing
I have an interview in two weeks at a place that I don't think will care about how bad I am at interviewing, so I really hope I get the job!
@@HeWhoWatchesTheStarsgood luck!! 🍀
"I had so many awesome random facts to share, and she didn't ask ONCE." I feel so seen.
I want your favorite awesome random facts! I'll start: Kangaroos start out with two vag*nas (censoring anatomical term because youtube hates science lol) and develop a third one after they get pregnant
@@ItsAsparageeseI can’t even stay on the bit that’s genuinely news to me and *wild*
@@ItsAsparageese 😮 🤩Nature is so amazing!
My random awesome fact of the moment: it took homo sapiens sapiens several thousand years to develop the use of 90° angles in architecture. There's sites in Syria where you can see the entire development in the archaeological strata
@@nyarparablepsis872 Ooh interesting lol, I imagine because a whole structure has to be square if you're gonna use that theme pretty much anywhere ... I'll have to look more into that, thanks for the info!
@@ItsAsparageese why kangaroos got 2 peepees?
I love that turtle just casually cruising around the table 😂
He is super awesome
@@jeffbrownsclassroom Master Uguay ❤
IT'S A FUCKING TORTOISE MAN
Neurodivergent: this is a time i felt not great
Neurotypical response: do you feel better now? Did you stop feeling not great?
Neurodivergent response: this is a time i also felt not great! It was so awful! I'm glad we can relate on how unsavory the human experience can be sometimes :)
And then there's the arsehole response: the thing making you feel not great is your fault. Also you're overreacting by feeling not great.
I genuinely feel like this is an American thing (I'm not American but my American colleagues have really had to dial it down in order to not be ostracised here, and they were popular smiley etc back in America) because as an AuDHD person I don't have problems with forced positivity & small talk in my country
I agree, no one is like that in France. People love to talk about not greatness
@sfmaslfkasl & @M_SC Thank you both for chiming in! This is absolutely a bias
@@sfmaslfkasl Yeah American culture leans towards allistic behavior, unfortunately. Or like, allistic people have less difficulty than we do (not saying they have none, I’m saying relative to autistic people)
The way I would have immediately asked about the turtle's diet and care instructions when he was introduced as part of the interview team...
You're hired!
Isn't it a tortoise? Anyway, I would have spoken directly to the tortoise and become fixated by its passage around the table - so much easier than looking and speaking to people!
It is a tortoise. And we would be cool with that
Yes! The way that she didn't even engage with the tortoise suggests that she's just not a team player 🤭😬
Oh I didn’t even think of that! 🤦
I just wanted to coo at it, stare at it, and ask if I can give it pets. I need to brush up on my interview skills!
that turtle is so fast
He can actually go much faster when he wants to.
Turtles are fast bois,tortoises are slow.
@@exosproudmamabear558he is a tortoise, and tortoises are speedy.
@@dragonscale46Tortoise are slow. If you saw a turtle running you would understand the difference. Also yeah I realised after you said it is indeed a tortoise(I didnt really look at it when I said the comment assuming they knew difference between turtle and tortoise big mistake) but doesnt change that tortoises are slower than turtles. But for a tortoise it is fast.
@exosproudmamabear558 that’s a normal speed for a tortoise. Tortoises are a lot faster than a lot of people think. Maybe not as fast as some other turtles, but still quick when they want to be.
Evidence:
ua-cam.com/users/shortsvZ86Eao5J54?si=G0RsQcVTWaMtRNhs
Also all tortoises are turtles.
How do we even KNOW she felt empathy? She didn't even share anything! 😂
She didn’t SHARE!!!!
Perhaps she just had boundaries & didn't feel comfortable sharing personal information with strangers
Not even kidding I learned something about how I (neurodivergent) and neurotypicals express empathy today through that one segment of the video.
@@colleenwilliams1689 yay! It's a big issue across the gap! Neurodivergent people often like to share a similar experience, as a way to relate to the story being told. But neurotypicals can take this as trying to change the conversation to being about yourself when they're sharing something going on with them.
@@elleinvestigates and yet I can’t stop doing it. How will they know that I know how bad it is if I don’t tell them my experience with it!!! 😂😂😂
This makes me wish I could always work in a neurodivergent workplace! Things would be much less confusing and needlessly alienating.
I totally agree. Luckily my teacher friends that surround me are either NDs or ND allies.
Get into computer science. 😆
@@jonathanmurray2986some of the worst interviews, but worth it.
My son told me he heard of a guy who only hires neurodivergent people. I was wondering where his business is.
Me too! I would love a place where I wouldn't be bothered with constant interactions, small talk, eye contact, etc., I could just be like the lady doodling. And I'm quite a social person in that I like company, but I like to keep to myself, I listen but I can't sit still and keep eye contact, and that the other person keeps to themselves, but we just share the space together. 🤷♀️
I was diagnosed autistic in first grade. I was able to sell being Neurotypical well enough during my job interview for my last retail job, but not actually during the job itself. I liked that job because the whole job was helping people. I did my job well because I cared about the care our customers received. But management didn't like me because even though I did the job of customer care well, if they wanted something done on the cleaning/maintenance side of things, they had to tell me first. Other employees, management could just leave them to their own devices and they'd 'find something to do to keep useful' but with me, my brain doesn't work that way. If you don't tell me something needs done, I'm not gonna know to do it, and I'm not gonna seek out something to do without being told to. But when they did tell me, I tried to put just as much effort into whatever job they told me needed done. With that being said, most people aren't anywhere near 100% efficient at work, with a good chunk of your time being spent either in transit (moving from one place to the next), in contemplation (thinking about what work you've done, what needs done, what order to do work in, etc.), or in upkeep (eating or using the bathroom). So when they fired me saying that out of the 100 hours I clocked over the last month, 3 of the hours during that time I spent clocked in but not actually working, I was surprised they'd fire someone for being 97% efficient when normally people are less efficient than that. Normal people will be clocked in despite not working for an even greater amount of time than that if my coworkers were anything to go by, so I'm convinced they just wanted to get rid of me in a way that I wouldn't be able to be hired again since they didn't wanna deal with having to tell me what to do all the time, no matter how good at my job I actually was. If I were to put it in a metaphor, they had me, a sharp knife that did the job well but management had to sharpen regularly in order to utilize, and then they had a dozen other duller knives that did the job worse but were autonomous and didn't require sharpening, and they chose to throw away the sharp knife. How these people's minds work, and how they keep companies running with this attitude, I'll never understand.
I feel you.. though I am hsp not autistic, I've been having similar problems. Through many different jobs, I've learned that if you want to be seen as a 'good employee', you need to intentionaly let others see how hard you work, and put a lot of emphasize on the 'show'. Which is exactly the reverse of what I am and my ways, coz I like to do the job as best as I can, and It is the thing I concentrate on, not on the showing and telling everyone how much I've done, and so on:/ but if you do not rub it in in their faces, they automaticaly presume that you are not doing your job, or that you do it poorly and lazing around.. one of the worst things for me is to market myself, so well.. let's say I struggle;)
I am very bad at telling my coworkers what I did and yes, the result is, they think I am lazy. I would love a manual on how to "rub it in their faces" 😂 Because it is so true, that's what they want 😮🙈😅
Ah yes the neurodivergent job experience. You put in way more work and skill than your neurotypical peers who barely do anything, but if you get caught doing something “abnormal” you’re viewed as the worst worker ever.
I quit my last job because I wasn't being given enough work. I was finishing my tasks far ahead of schedule and never had complaints about my actual work. After continually asking to be given more work I was told I needed to work more hours first to prove myself.
This is litterally so true, i'm glad im not alone :')
I (with probably ADHD) literally just had an interview and the interviewer and I both kept getting sidetracked and off topic. I straight up at one point asked “so how much ADHD you got?” when he asked if I have any questions. He laughed with me abt it. I’ve never clicked with an interviewer so much, I’m honestly really excited.
That's amazing! They are probably really excited to have someone they can relate to on board.
So...did you get the job?
@@natyboops yeah, I really like it so far
Yay! Happy story! Congrats on your job. ❤
@@edgard142ndofwelshdale7 🥳💚 fantastic
Person: I had a negative experience/feeling.
Neurotypical display of empathy: Apology, sympathetic remarks, express desire for negative state to be temporary
Neurodivergent display of empathy: share a similar type of negative feeling-experience to demonstrate a personal understanding of how the other person is feeling, the sharing is evidence of thoughtfulness and proof of empathy rather than assumption
It’s unfortunate that the neurotypical view is that we don’t have empathy. The sharing is a demonstration of active listening. When we display empathy to fellow neurodivergent people, the result is catharsis. It evokes feelings of “I’m not alone,” and “This person gets me.” That builds connection, emotional intimacy, which is important for healthy relationships. But when we display empathy to neurotypical people, we are often told we are selfish and uncaring and rude and make everything about ourselves. Perhaps those who would say that should think of a time when they said something intending to be positive and supportive, but someone else took it the wrong way and assigned malicious intent to them.
YES! YT's algorithm recommended a video to me earlier that asserted the way I show empathy is a "charisma killer" that employs "conversational narcissism" and "unsolicited advice." When a loved one shares their negative experience, I share my own to let them know they're not alone and I'm here to help them get through difficulties together. And if something worked for me, I'll offer it as a potential solution. How is it narcissistic to highlight commonalities in the human experience and want to offer solutions? Isn't it less empathetic to say a curt, "I'm sorry, I hope that gets better," without engaging in the distressing issue and offering support to work through it? I was feeling really bad about myself after watching that, but this video and the comments have helped a lot. Thank you!
That's how neurodivergents show empathy. It's totally good and not conversational narcissism. Glad the video helped.
I’ve come to find I am different in wanting to feel listened to and heard. I have had so many people claim they understood me, but they didn’t and were cramming me into a box based on assumptions and their ultimate message belittled my experience. Like waving away concerns or calling something I’m doing a phase I’ll get over.
That's a display of "I know what that feels like" which does have an air of empathy to it. As in, you think of how you would feel in a similar situation. That's step one of empathy and usually internal (attunement).
However, according to the empathy experts (Marshall Rosenberg and Brene Brown), it's still an empathy miss because empathy is about listening and reflecting understanding of *their* experience.
(I'm a Highly Sensitive Person under the neurodiversity umbrella) 🙂
I’m a neurotypical therapist, and I feel this is so helpful for perspective taking! Thank you for sharing!
I'm so glad that it's helpful. Feel free to use it in any way that is helpful for you.
I also strongly recommend the pixigags skits. I relate so much with the ASD, ADHD, and depression cats
very true. I was shocked (as a neurotypical) at how many comments there were about the turtle.
@@LKaempen how did you perceive the turtle then? I'm assuming you don't see a turtle in the interview room everyday right? You would've had your thoughts or feelings about it, right? Would you just not state them as some form of politeness? I mean they explicitly introduced him, so acknowledging it wouldn't have been rude, impolite or weird. Isn't realizing that a social cue? No offense, but this is why don't get this ND people and social cues cliché. In this video there were so many that flew over her head. Like how they wanted her to react to the quotes. I wouldn't have recognised them either, but I would've asked, if I wouldn't have felt anxious, which I can't say yet. And what's all this feigned enthusiasm worth if the words are so so empty? She likes to travel only to tell other people about it? What? Didn't even name a single country she's visited. Is that really so ND to find her unapproachable? Genuine question, no judgement, sorry if it sounds like that, btw.
As an AuDHDer who has worked a long time in academia, I absolutely loved this video! I laughed so hard when she started going on and on about the dog.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Hey new best friend. I’m in it now. 😅
Same! I'm AuDHD and I had a husky. I had to put him down two months ago, but I have lots of stories about him.
what is AuDHD and why instead of ADHD
@@myrmiadAutism + ADHD
“i just don’t think we can work with somebody who doesn’t get our movie quotes” is so so SO real 😭
Story of my life
I'm neurodivergent and I wouldn't know the movie quotes. Movies are not one of my special interests.
@@ruthhorowitz7625 that’s fair, i think if you had something else to quote (shows, internet memes, books, etc) you’d be able to get by
@@MrsAnnThropy I can quote science facts🤣
I suspect I subconsciously hired someone based on this before. Such a relief
I act just like the interviewee in interviews, but I'm just masking. I taught myself to do that to have a better chance of getting the job. I would have definitely asked a lot of questions about the turtle though!
Yeah I'm a masking autistic and have exhausted myself from doing so. I made a video about it here: ua-cam.com/video/nCRIM7LVlYs/v-deo.html
same lol i go in there and just lie 😌🙏
And then I go home and take a nap.
I get the job! But a couple of months later it becomes clear what an abject disappointment I am as an employee because I never remember to say, "Good morning," to people, and I can't figure out whether to follow the handbook versus the contradicting verbal instructions (Is it neither? Or somehow both?)
@@O2lifeThe conflicting instructions, YES. I want to scream when I get things 'wrong' because I did precisely as instructed.
@@O2lifeI totally relate!
The woman masking immediately while not looking or not doodling is me in person.
and then infodumping about my dog for an hour
@@Lobotomobillionaire I'm the one automatically telling people, "Me, too" after they say, yes, they also have or do something I've already info dumped about.
NT: small talk is how you establish trust, because crazy and dangerous people cant talk about the weather.
ND: so if i can talk about the weather you're making positive moral assumptions about me? Arent serial killers really good at faking that stuff to get close to strangers?
NT: why are you talking about serial killers?
Oh I felt that in my bones! 😂 "I'm not taking about serial killers! What part of I'm using that to demonstrate an important point don't you get? I'm talking about the point/principle. What I use to illustrate it is not the focus." NT's often seem to miss a point or principle by getting distracted by the topic of a part.
@@carla8478preach
MF, *you* brought up "crazy and dangerous people"
That, and small talk is something anyone can do with the bare minimum emotion or even faked or misleading intent. Talking about something more meaningful establishes actual trust and interest in talking with a person because it shows that you're willing to share something more personal with them. Someone who has malicious intent wouldn't want to do that, why would they want to share personal interests or experience with someone they dislike? But ofc NTs will see this as being weird or even selfish!
People who talk about the weather and work are sociopaths . Yuck, and don’t ask me about my family
I worked as an elementary school teacher with autism. It was very difficult. I started at a school that understood my diagnosis and went out of their way to assist me (and I honestly regret leaving). My second school was hellish. My principal actually told me, to my face, that she thought I was too mentally slow to be a teacher. When I asked her if she remembered I had autism, she went white as a sheet. She never spoke to me again while I worked there (which was only a month longer) and did everything in her power to get me fired. I quit before she could. But yeah, be careful neurodivergent teachers, some administration will actively try to get rid of you while simultaneously pretending to be inclusive. Oh and that second school I worked at was a title one school that worked with autistic and special needs kids. So the fact that the principal could be that cruel to a member of her staff that had the same condition was unforgivable. I honestly didn’t even get into the stuff I went through working for that horrible judgmental woman. I quit teaching forever due to that experience.
I'm so sorry that you were treated so horribly, It's those kind of experiences that make me want to train more schools. I've been traveling to schools training them about ND kids and staff.
Name and shame. No ND kid deserves to be subjected to an administration that malign.
Dont be shy drop the school name
@@jeffbrownsclassroomThank you for your efforts in that department. It is certainly needed.
It is terrible to hear that you went through that. I was harassed at a job for other reasons but I went the legal route.
It is not comfortable, but it prevents others from going through the same experience.
Additionally, you're eligible for unemployment if they fire you, which is why they try and make you quit, so it saves their organization money.
Even without a lawsuit, unemployment can give relief and breathing room to find a new job where you are treated as you deserve to be treated.
Wow, I was very amused by this and also sad to know what a common experience this is for so many of us. Before I knew about my neurodivergence, I just assumed I was grossly incompetent compared to those around me, even though on paper I was just about "as impressive." I lose hope sometimes that I'll find a profession where I "fit."
A kind neighbor of mine, who I suspect may also be neurodivergent, is an instrument repairman. He let me tag along to some of his jobs. The thought of entering a space to perform a service on my own terms and then promptly leaving sounds about as ideal as work can get, so I hope I can learn more.
my family has an heirloom violin, and we had to take it to be repaired a few times, the repair shop we took it to was so magical looking! all these colorful vials of mysterious liquids, jars of stuff, etc. I've concluded that instrument repair is 1. a form of wizardry and 2. a career only a neurodivergent person would truly excel in. I wish you the best of luck if you decide to be an instrument repair wizard!
Unfortunately it is super common. I hope this works out for you it sounds like a good plan.
I’m a machine tech (most of the time, jobs in machine shops means many hats, hah) and a lot of people in that line of work are very neurodivergent! Most of my coworkers are unabashedly neurospicy in some shape or form, and it comes in handy in our line of work because having the ability to take experience with one kind of machine and extrapolating that laterally onto other machinery is valuable.
I often get the impression that many folks in the repair field are neurodivergent because of this, as well as the intricacies of parts and processes - and how particular every single tech I meet is, lol. A very opinionated bunch we are 😂
3:38
"He likes to eat people."
Be momentarily inattentive, and you'll miss it.
relatable
"he's a little Chihuahua mix, he likes to eat people ..." 😂
Wait, I misheard that as 'he likes to eat pizza' XD
Inattentive is my middle name!
As an autistic person who's been jobless since I finished my university 1,5 years ago... I feel this pain so, so much. I always knew this was going to be the case and dreaded it... I'm the most depressed I've ever been. And the most fun part is that when I used to have a job back in the day, constant masking makes you so tired that it's like you are working 3 jobs at once but only get paid for one. No masking equals being ostracized. Im registered as unemployed and the lady at the office doesn't understand why it's so hard for me to get a job.
I'm so sorry I know how demoralizing that can be
I'm so sorry. I hope you get the workplace environment you deserve!
I understand that stress. No matter how talented , skilled, knowledgeable in the work I performed in the midst of NT work places, the stress of masking was exhausting. Perform too high and their social status or ego is threatened. That creates stress for them. Performing below your personal standards is stressful for you. I've always worked best when working for myself, untethered by the constraints of unwritten NT work rules. Might be best to not limit yourself by working for someone else.
Holy shit you put it into words. I can do carpentry and be on my feet 7+ hours a day and I'll have bit of back pain or muscle aches sometimes, but I'm generally fine. Put me in a customer service job or have to be surrounded by other (very talkative and younger) students and I am exhausted. It does feel like working 3 jobs
@@MVance-k9pcan I just say, that was a perfect example of ND empathy ❤
I kinda wish job interviews were done like a normal conversations. It would be less stressful. I hate the very structed conversation when my working memory SUCKS and I forget what I was supposed to say.
Also, the dog infodumping is so real. I have to stop myself or I'll talk for AGES. I usually either write no comments on UA-cam or absolute essays. There's no in-between. I'd say it kinda is like that in real life. I may never start a conversation but if you start one with me I either will be slightly uncomfortable because it's a topic I don't enjoy much so I don't know much about it or I'll love that topic and I could talk with you about it for 3 hours straight.
I was in several interviews on company side and actually, being casual and direct was very positive, not only to me but also my colleagues. It depends!!!
Whenever I was the interviewer, I did more casual style interviews. I found them helpful, cause I got to know the real person and I also found them less stressful! Win-win
Same here! I also do love your Grian pfp!!! :D
Same, the only good interview I've ever had was with a manager at a pet supply store who framed it like a friendly conversation, asked me questions about my passion for animals, & was like - 'you'll be perfect for this!' Sadly, I found out that I had been passed over when the next week, I was there doing my job at an adoption event with my local cat rescue, & saw a bunch of new hires being shown around the store...probably because they could already work a cash register etc, like always... But still! I wish all interviews were like that!
I think casual would be stressful for me as I wouldn't know the proper decorum as the interviewer or interviewee.
The only thing I would add is this:
“Did you notice how much she smiles?”
“Oh, yeah, that was super weird!”
“Even after you said you’d been sick.”
“Yeah.”
“What was she smiling about? Job interviews aren’t fun!”
“Yeah, it was like she wasn’t taking this seriously.”
“I’ll be honest, I felt like it was about me. I don’t think I can work with someone who’s secretly laughing at me, like in their head. Not again.”
“Right, right, that’s the worst.”
“Smiling for no reason is so toxic.”
Also I’ve subscribed.
I always have the impulse to share a story about a similar bad experience when someone else is having a hard time but then it always becomes "way to make it about YOU." I no longer share anything in fear of getting that reaction... but now when someone confides in me I don't know what to say which seems just as bad.
I feel bad because I do this too, but I get very frustrated with my parents (both undiagnosed but almost certainly also ND) who also do it. I've come to realize there's a difference between telling a short story and explicitly relating it back to the person with "so I can/can't imagine how hard x must be" (depending on how similar my experience was), and derailing the entire conversation to talk about my problems. 😅
I've been learning to catch myself before I derail conversations. It doesn't always work because some people will never appreciate the attempt, but it feels like a better compromise to me than just completely suppressing myself.
I feel bad because I do this too, but I get very frustrated with my parents (both undiagnosed but almost certainly also ND) who also do it. I've come to realize there's a difference between telling a short story and explicitly relating it back to the person with "so I can/can't imagine how hard x must be" (depending on how similar my experience was), and derailing the entire conversation to talk about my problems. 😅
I've been learning to catch myself before I derail conversations. It doesn't always work because some people will never appreciate the attempt, but it feels like a better compromise to me than just completely suppressing myself.
Same
The chairs squeaking the whole way through... *shudder*
But really, this is amazing! As a education student, I am dreading the interview process.
Oh, should I turn sound on or just not bother bc it's such a horrible sound?
Wow I've never watched anything that illustrated so clearly the ND/NT divide. That disconnected, performative, AI speak the NT's do with all the inflections and smiles and eye contact is so robotic. 😮
I hate the fact that I do that… 😂 but I feel like I have to
I overly research about job interviews cos it stresses me out to no end. I always make a script and feel like I have to pretend to be a robot 😅 it’s so odd that a robot is what they want
@@summero-my5in Yep, I had to teach myself to do it. I overheard coworkers complain that I don't say, "Good morning," or ask them irrelevant personal questions. I was 28 and that was my first clue I was "supposed to" do that. Another time, I read a book that discussed the cultural practice of (women mostly) giving reciprocal compliments on attire ("I love your shirt!" "Oh thanks, your scarf is adorable, where did you get it?" -- I don't wear scarves, but apparently that doesn't matter). Anyway, I tried it out on the grouchy payroll secretary, to very good effect! She was always helpful to me and never grumbled at me after I started doing that.
I also almost got fired one time for failing to recognize a supervisor's suggestion (He said, "I suggest.... ") as a direct order. Another boss got annoyed with because I didn't use the word processor he liked, but did not require. I need people to just tell me what I need to do, because I do not speak Hint-ish.
"AI speak" -- Interesting. Does the text generated by AIs sound so artificial in part because it mimics neutrotypical responses? To me such attempts to sound friendlier come across as insincerity.
That smile weirded me out. Too many teeth.
The hardest question to answer for me has always been, "Where do you see yourself in five years."
Dude, I'm still bracing myself for what you might say five minutes from now, I can't plan for five years.
Standard interview questions you can train yourself for & cater to what the interviewer wants to hear. This particular question is an invitation to talk about a possible future career with the people you’re being interviewed by. And trust me, NT people also prepare their responses in this canned way- it’s expected.
(Ps I learned this from a Matt Rose video)
Me fighting the urge to say "Your mom"
I said I'd I might be retired and I was.
Whenever I hear anyone ask me about my Five Year Plan, I think of Soviet Russia, and grow anxious. Suddenly, it feels more like an interrogation than an interview.
@TheChadXperience909 amazing reference, from another history nerd lol
I was introduced to a new colleague yesterday. I hated it. I literally said "I'm nice". I'm 40 years old. How am I not better at this by now. I was also introduced "as kind of a hermit". I mean, it's true, but damn.
That's actually a pretty witty response if you were just introduced as a hermit
@SeveralGhost Thank you. From now on, I will remember your comment any time that awkward situation pops into my mind (which based on past experiences, will be a lot in the years to come). Thank you for a different point of view 😊
I have to agree with SeveralGhost. You gave the perfect response to being introduced that way! 🏆
This is the funniest youtube comment I've ever read.
😭 so many of these are like. how I've learned to behave but like. SHE DIDN'T EVEN SAY HI TO THE TURTLE
🐢TORTOISE! 🐢
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present."
A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo.
Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️
Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae.
"Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱
And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄
"There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢
The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤
Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND
you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵
"We called him tortoise because he taught us."
👩🏫🐢
Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides.
😡🙄🙂☺️
"The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself."
🙏
Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)!
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
I know -- she completely ignored the turtle!
I’m appalled at her indifference toward the turtle 😿
Fr. Stop ignoring the beautiful turtle :(.
If interviews were like this I wouldn't have as much anxiety
This I so incredibly relatable… I really would love working with other neurodivergent people. That way I won’t feel self-conscious about the way I converse…
It is nice to have ND co-workers but my NT ones are very supportive as well luckily
The turtle!🐢
🐢TORTOISE! 🐢
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present."
A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo.
Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️
Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae.
"Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱
And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄
"There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢
The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤
Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND
you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵
"We called him tortoise because he taught us."
👩🏫🐢
Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides.
😡🙄🙂☺️
"The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself."
🙏
Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)!
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
1:53 The turtle coming in 😭💕
Hilarious 😂😂😂
It looks like the camera angle of the interviewers was either blandly or coldly color graded or it had no color grading which contrasts the warmer look of the interviewee’s angle. Interesting creative choice. I also like that the interviewers have movie posters behind them and they kept making references
Awww I love the part about Jerry, I love dogs, my girls are Avery (her full name is Avery "Mouse" Lee though) and Pantera (known mostly as Pants or The Wugget), Pants is 14 and she's a cattle dog mix and Avery will be 13 in a couple of months and she's a pyrenees mix and they're really smart and Avery used to climb fences and trees but now she doesn't try that stuff anymore since she's older (which I'd say is the only good thing about any dog getting old) so it's kind of funny because Avery was always the problem child (I called them "perfect child" and "problem child" for ages) but now that they're older they've totally reversed roles and Pantera is a troublemaker now lol she's started eating random objects out of nowhere (just a few weeks ago she puked up a cat toy from her brother's house!) oh and their brother is Butters, he's my ex's dog and we're all still best friends and we visit a lot (Avery is really the one who made us adopt him ("him" being Butters, not my ex)), he's probably a lab/pit/maybe rottie/maybe sharpei type of mix (also referring here to Butters and not my ex), just a big blocky butterbean (his full name is Butters Samuel Bean) and he's actually the sweetest of the three, he's really sensitive and gets anxious sometimes (we called it "getting agitatered" which became "tatered" and now when one of us is tatered about something we say stuff like "don't be a tater, be a bean!") and actually all three have a whole extensive array of nicknames with cute etymologies lol but omg I almost forgot to share that BUTTERS NURSES ON BLANKIES which is INSANELY CUTE, this blocky big 100-lb pibble-lookin' vanillabean nursing on a blankie to calm himself every day, especially when he has one of his hoodies on, it's the best, he's so cute, they're all such good dogs, well except Pantera sometimes now that she's in her Sassy Pants era lol, but anyway I really liked this video and I love dogs and Jerry sounds like a great dog and if anyone read this far then do you have a dog?
❤❤❤❤❤
That's some awesome stuff going on there
I don't have a dog. I have 2 cats, but I like dogs. Maybe if I had enough land and house I might have a dog too if my cats wouldn't hate it, but they probably would. Cats are Genie and Gidget, sisters, all grey. We got them from a shelter when they were about 8 months old. They're such sweeties. Gidget is definitely the smarter of the two, also more nervous. She will go hide if anyone comes to the house that doesn't live here. Genie is the not as bright cat that is sweet and social. Anyone comes to the house, she will think they came to see her in particular. Gidget is recovering from over grooming; probably from the stress of having my mother-in-law live with us for a while. My mother-in-law would not have anything to do with petting the cats or letting them on her lap, only insisted on feeding them, which I think confused poor Gidget greatly.
No because my landlord doesn't allow it but I hope to in the future. And a goat, a donkey, and some chickens.
Thank you for telling us about your dogs! I don't have any dogs. I had a cat who was basically my life partner, she was so snuggle and purr, we knew each other so well, I could even ask her "show me" when I didn't understand her and she'd show me what she wanted (half the time, it was to take a nap with me XD). I lost her a few months ago and it's been really hard. I started volunteering at a cat shelter, though, and I asked to foster their meanest, fussiest cat, and when I brought her home her personality suddenly changed completely! She's now so wonderfully sweet and purry. I learned so much from my old cat how to make this cat feel comfortable and happy and how to help with her medical issues, it's a balm. I still really miss my old cat, though. I love them both so much, even though they'd probably dislike each other intensely (my old cat always hated cats, though she liked dogs).
What is truly interesting is that neurodivergent individuals communicate better with other neurodivergent people, than neurotypical individuals communicate with other neurotypicals
I'm very tempted to try setting up some sort of neurodivergent-specialized online school that gamifies the learning process
That sounds interesting. Teach schools about neurodivergents.
@jeffbrownsclassroom oh, no, I meant an online school both run by neurodivergent staff and serving neurodivergent students
I figure it might be more enjoyable for neurodivergent students, since a virtual classroom wouldn't involve the sensory distractions and if another student is messing with you, you can just remove them from your vision and hearing
@@MawdyDevIt's not a bad idea, but I worry it would be kind of isolating. I may not have high social needs, but some neurodivergent people do. This idea might cause similar issues as traditional homeschooling where students often feel isolated and just different than other students due to the lack of public socialization.
@@callmepiee2009 my idea was for a virtual classroom, the student would effectively be sitting at a virtual desk with the ability to see the models of their classmates and hear what their classmates say.
If another classmate is being distracting, they can opt to remove the other student from their sensory input, but by default everyone would be visible and audible
Edit: the models wouldn't have to actually look like the students, of course.
I meant that I teach schools about neurodivergents . It was a typo. Your idea sounds awesome.
The "not it!" Nose touch was always my bane. I was always 'it' 😂
Oh god, me too, it's actually such a relief to realise I'm not alone with that
I wonder who will be 'it', when you guys meet.
This needs to go viral SO BAD
Oh goodness! It's been so hard to try unlearning the "reciprocal communication style" thing. I never realized it was considered rude or self-centered. I thought I was communicating that I could relate, without going captain obvious with, "oh I can totally relate" surface level blah
I genuinely don't understand how surface level blah is 'better' than sharing a similar experience
I haven't been diagnosed but I know I'm neurodivergent, I either have ADHD or autism, or both, and I'm planning on going for a diagnosis. Funny thing is I try to mask and do a terrible job of it. I for example make small talk about the weather and share a bunch of statistics like the record high and low and averages for that date and then a bunch of other records for that month. Or some kind of event going on space-related and I go on an impressive tangent. I love to talk about space stuff so much I forget to swallow when talking.
I'm so thankful the interview process went smoothly for the jobs I have, I work at a planetarium and also do astronomy-related independent research. I suppose it's a field where a lot of us reside. Sometimes I like to joke that I'm an alien from another planet studying Earthlings as my real job. -I hope nobody discovers my secret, haha-
I feel seen. Haha
I thought it was so funny that at the time you were talking about things being awkward, the turtle was awkwardly slipping into the crack as he walked 😂
I didn't realize that, master Oogway is an amazing actor
They didn’t interrupt her once. UNREALISTIC!
If they would be mor ADHD they would have interrupted.
I loved Mrs Darris when I was in school, she's an incredible english teacher and helped me feel more comfortable in class when I came out as trans. Love the video!
Agreed. Ms. Darras is awesome!
her answers were suspiciously well-constructed and to the point. She must have been lying.
This is eye opening in a lot of ways
I wish more interviews were like this tbh.
I FEEL SO SEEN, the whole "She didn't even share a time she was sick" thing!!!!
I lost it at the "passionate" question..."she only talked for a few seconds" 😄
“Edna mode. And guest. “ after the incredibles quote really got me good 😂 so real
I would accept defeat at the part with dog info dump. It would break my expectations of this social activity and require me to spend more energy than I had anticipated. I can completely understand where the interviewer comes from, but this is a job interview, I wired my brain to do the business talk and caught up on my formal expressions, prepared my part of the dialogue, and then you suddenly jump to semi-friendly dog talk? Get me out X)
It's nice to compare the experiences, because, even in differences, I can relate to these people. Thank you for the video!
Why didn't they see the interviewee was masking? I don't know what she was like behind the mask, but it was obviously a mask. That's why when I am interviewing I do my best to have at least some time during the interview where the interviewee doesn't have their mask up as much. (Since I'm in computer science, that usually involves sticking an interesting problem in front of them and watching/listening to them work it out)
And I know staring at people can make them feel awkward, but how can I understand what makes them tick If I don't watch them? I don't make eye contact to seem trustworthy - I grew up with cats! I make eye contact because I am watching the facial micro gestures. I am very good at pattern recognition. Admittedly, if I were being interviewed, I would probably have changed my technique when I saw my eyes were making them nervous, but I probably still would have gone back to staring as soon as I needed to read body language again. 🙃
Now, not enjoying the movie quotes would definitely be a problem culture-wise. As a person who doesn't watch the same movies as others, I definitely didn't enjoy being surrounded by people doing movie quotes constantly at a previous job 😂
Yeah I'm a masking autistic myself which is why i do more eye contact then the other two interviewers who are just acting autistic. Didn't want to muddy the waters to much with this but you may like my video on masking here: ua-cam.com/video/nCRIM7LVlYs/v-deo.html
@@jeffbrownsclassroom which are the 2 that were just acting autistic?
I'm the one in the middle, the other two are just acting
Thankyou. 😊🙌 I was wondering how long the turtle worked at the school, and happy that movie quotes are an integral part of communication! also , I love that other humans try to relate by sharing experiences (good or bad) to show empathy, I thought it was just me. I would love to just be drawing and doodling when speaking with people, but I am not that brave.
excellent questions. The tortoise has been here for two years. And you'll fit in quite well with the movie quotes and empathy.
Please don't judge and discriminate against a person just because you assume they have neurotypical disorder. She's human, too. And she can't help it, she was born this way.
Show some sympathy for her, she's wasting countless hours of precious lifetime on small talk, while never being able to experience true joy while babbling on about an interesting topic for hours on end.
At least give her a chance, maybe she'll learn to mask her disorder and to better fit in. If she really keeps staring into other peoples eyes, you can just fire her and instead hire someone who doesn't think society has to constantly cater to their special needs.
(Jokes aside, I never realised talking about similar experiences was a neurodivergence thing. I thought it was normal to demonstrate you can relate to their suffering ...? 0_o )
The creaking chair would upset me so much omg
Ooh, love this! I so would have loved this interview! Think it would have gone quite differently though.
I'm sure we would've hired you
I wonder how many interviews for programming positions go like this.
"Did anyone else notice she didn't catch any of our movie quotes?" Amazing. Why do I kind of relate to all of these people?
QUOTES?!
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present."
A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo.
Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️
Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae.
"Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱
And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄
"There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢
The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤
Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND
you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵
"We called him tortoise because he taught us."
👩🏫🐢
Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides.
😡🙄🙂☺️
"The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself."
🙏
Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)!
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
Is that a sulcata or a box turtle? Can I use comic books to teach English? Actually can I let the students teach me about their favorite books instead?
Excellent questions. It's an Eastern Hermann's Tortoise, but yes on the others
"Actually can I let the students teach me about their favorite books instead?" isnt that just a book report?
This is amazing. Really related to the "sharing experiences of being sick" as the natural and empathetic thing to do. (Or rather not do, in the NT world.)
04:44 is KEY to social awareness, this video is like oscar deserving.
Having just gotten passed over for yet another job after an interview that seemed to go well enough but just fizzled out...
I'm so sorry that happened so much for my daughter also
@jeffbrownsclassroom I'm sorry to her as well! It's really painful. It feels so personal.
NOOOO not the movie quotes 😂
As an AuDHDer I do wish these examples wouldn’t insist that “eye contact is a big nono for everyone” because you can also be on the opposite end of that spectrum, and I sometimes make neurotypical people uncomfortable with how much eye contact i make to show them “im definitely paying attention to you! Im being so attentive!” And sometimes it helps me actually concentrate on what they’re saying and remember it easier.
Totally get that. I'm an AuDHDer also and high masking. I tend to look people in the eyes too much. I didn't want to muddy the waters too much with this particular video but I did talk about it in this one on masking: ua-cam.com/video/nCRIM7LVlYs/v-deo.html And it will feature in future videos as well
😂 I would LOVE working with you!!
You should come teach with us!
Genuinely lol'd at the "eye contact" bit :) Great to be seen, thanks all
Lol, as a neurotypical who works closely with a lot of neurodivergent people, this really made me laugh so hard. This is just like normal interactions between us all and I guess we're all just used to each other and don't realise how funny it is, lol.
Beautiful! So well done! I’m agreeing and giggling. Love it!💕
“It was crowded… and loud.” Lol that’s the way I describe every experience outside my house!
I didn't realize I did that, but I always totally want to hear when people go through the same issue as me.
Yes! This! Very spot on, very accurately reversed. I love this!! Plus, I laughed a lot even the sixth time I watched it.
Glad you enjoyed it!
makes me shutter to think that "professionals" actually sit around and rudely judge me about petty things like eye contact in the irrelevant setting of a job interview
Yes too all of that! The interview process as it stands is good if you want charming, chatty, outgoing people to fill your ranks. You're just going to be stuck trying to herd them back to their work tasks rather than socializing.
She didn't even tell any stories about when she was sick, how do we know she felt empathy? That hits home so hard!
This was so affirming and just… I might cry. Thank you for normalizing us!!! ❤️❤️❤️
"How was home coming?"
"Loud. . ."
"Crowded. . ."
YES!
This *needs* to become the new standard!! 😊
My sister just introduced me to this channel. Thank you! I’m an autistic high school math teacher. It’s so refreshing to find someone who gets it.
Also, I talk about my dog like that.
I'm so glad you found the channel. I totally get being autistic and a teacher. I'm hoping to do some more videos on that.
I love the space tie!
Thanks, my wife made that for me, so I let her know what you said.
This was just recommended to me and I loved it! Reading that you yourself are AuDHD makes me feel so much more comfortable because I am too! I'll be sharing around your videos and website!
I hate that the interviewee just sounds exactly like me during a job interview, despite me being autistic, because I mask just like that in order to get a job.
Does it work?
Yeah I'm a masking autistic also. It's how I teach unfortunately ua-cam.com/video/nCRIM7LVlYs/v-deo.html I'm learning to unmask
"Do you have dogs?"
"Yes I have dogs"
"Me too!" After just having told everyone about my dogs is the most relatable thing I've ever heard lol
Punching the like button so hard
Who else just kept focusing on the tortoise and wishing they could pet it?
Yep. But we need to respect Master Ooway's body boundaries. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ No touching without consent
🐢TORTOISE! 🐢
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present."
A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo.
Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️
Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae.
"Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱
And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄
"There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢
The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤
Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND
you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵
"We called him tortoise because he taught us."
👩🏫🐢
Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides.
😡🙄🙂☺️
"The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself."
🙏
Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)!
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
I love the Turtle!
The tortoise is so real, personally I'll just have a random plant
This video makes me feel seen, in a good way ❤
I'm so glad. That's the whole purpose is so that we are all seen.
I woulda been answering the questions looking at the turtle and like the turtle was asking. 🐢
I actually find eye contact to be rude because in my experience pointing your ear at someone makes it easier to hear them, which is a sign that you want to hear what theyre saying. Eye contact creates an arena where one can pretend to listen but not actually be by just nodding and making listening sounds, and that to me is disingenuous and disrespectful
Yeah I'm planning to do another video about this.
@@jeffbrownsclassroom im not sure if it's true of all native cultures but in my tribe, the Smelqmix, and some other Salish tribes, we tend to have conversations side by side instead of while facing each other. It follows the same logic, that we are listening to each other, and that we are looking in the same direction. I think it's not just neurodivergent but also culturally important.
I think we also have a tendency to react more when facing the person were trying to communicate with. We should be able to acknowledge our emotions but direct them away from other people so they can be released without gaining resentment. I think our energetic direction is a super important thing in terms of how we communicate - this is even true when training dogs, or leading groups of people. Often groups of people will follow your direction and the way you're walking. My dogs will often follow me off leash because I focus on my body direction and they pay attention to it even when they're out of my eyeline. They know from something deep in nature what the direction is, like some sort of magnetic thing. And I think it affects us more than we think too
@@jeffbrownsclassroom in my native tribe, the Smelqmix, and in other Salish tribes, we tend to have conversations side by side. I think we are trying to listen to each other talk while avoiding reaction by not facing one another. I think it's also a way of petitioning the Great Spirit to oversee our conversation and help us come to peace. We are releasing our concerns to the wind so we don't release them to each other, and I think it's the best way to communicate
@@amelioravictoriadionyssia3323 That seems very thoughtful and would be ideal for me!
"I asked her what she was passionate about, and she only talked for a few seconds. What is she trying to hide from us?!"
Hahaha kind of nice to see things reversed
3:52 I feel so validated right now. I make so many obscure movie quotes all the time and nobody ever gets them.
🐢QUOTES?!! 🐢
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. 🎁That is why it is called the present."
A distinction between the two that’s worth unpacking, imo.
Tortoises are land-dwelling creatures from the family Testudinidae. Unlike turtles, which are semi-aquatic and have webbed feet or flippers for swimming, tortoises have sturdy, elephant-like legs and domed shells designed for terrestrial life. They’re the slow-moving champions of dry habitats, perfectly adapted to trudge across land. 🏜️
Turtles, on the other hand, need their flatter, more streamlined shells for cutting through water. Sea turtles belong to the family Cheloniidae (e.g., green sea turtles) or Dermochelyidae (e.g., leatherback sea turtles). Freshwater turtles are often part of the family Emydidae (e.g., painted turtles) or Trionychidae (softshell turtles). Snapping turtles are in the family Chelydridae.
"Turtles had it easy. Turtles had the sea. A tortoise on its back was a tortoise that's going to die. But turtles could swim, flip, and bob away."🦅😱
And if course MASTER OOGWAY is the Tortoise from🥋🐼 Kung Fu Panda (released in 2008, by the way-same year as the first iPhone launch, if you want a timeline connection). Oogway is the ultimate representation of tortoise wisdom and serenity, sitting calmly in his lush, terrestrial habitat. ⛩️🐢🌄
"There are no accidents."🦺⛑️🐢
The oldest tortoise, Jonathan, is estimated to be around 192 years old. Jonathan is a Seychelles giant tortoise (Aldabrachelys gigantea hololissa) who lives on the island of Saint Helena in the South Atlantic Ocean. He arrived on St. Helena in 1882. Jonathan is blind and has no sense of smell, but he's otherwise healthy. He has good hearing and finds his way around by sound. His favorite foods include 🥒, 🥕, 🍎, 🍌, and 🥬❤ . What would it be like if a NT job candidate tried to impress a tortoise like Jonathon in an interview. 🤣🤣🐢❤
Imagine walking into a job interview, and the interviewer is a tortoise AND
you accidentally call them a TURTLE, or worse, TREAT them like one. You suggest they’d thrive with a water feature in the office, compliment their "flippers," or offer a glass bowl of water for their comfort. Disaster! The tortoise, a deeply terrestrial being, would feel completely misunderstood. They might sit there silently (as tortoises do), but you’d sense the vibe shift. What you’ve done is show you haven’t taken the time to understand their core needs and nature-a major faux pas.🙈🙉🙊🐵
"We called him tortoise because he taught us."
👩🏫🐢
Now let’s zoom out: mistaking a tortoise for a turtle is a lot like mistaking a neurodivergent person for a neurotypical one. It’s easy to fall into what’s called the double empathy problem-a mismatch in understanding between different neurotypes. Neurodivergent folks often experience the world in unique ways, just like tortoises are adapted to land rather than water. Assuming everyone processes things the same way (like assuming a tortoise wants to swim) leads to frustration on both sides.
😡🙄🙂☺️
"The thing about being a tortoise was that, when you are locked on your back, there is no right way up. The world stays stubbornly upside down. You have to be a turtle to have even a vague chance of righting yourself."
🙏
Thanks for sharing and commenting on a clip that emphasizes the need to respect the distinct adaptations of tortoises and turtles, & similarly the strengths and needs of neurodivergent individuals.📊💭💬 Misunderstanding or mislabeling either can result in lost opportunities for connection. So, learn about tortoises! Take the time to notice and honor differences (esp 🐒 vs 🐠, obs)!
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍
I wish job interviews were like this 😂😂😂
The only unrealistic thing was that the the woman interviewer didn't already know her colleague had a dog 😂
I was asked in an interview what i didnt like about my previous job. I told what i didnt like (how i was terminated a week after handing me 401k paperwork). I was denied for talking negatively about my previous employer. Apparently i was just supposed to lie. Why even ask a question when every succesful answer is going to be a lie
Wait, they're telling you *why* you went accepted?
yes unfortunately this is an area you are supposed to lie. Interviewing is a game that is focused on neurotypical social rules which is what frustrates me and so many of us. It's why I made this video.
@@sleepyote honestly that was a big shock. Mustve been a thing because it was through an agency
It is definitely a bit of song and dance, unfortunately. When I was an interviewer, I often would ask this question to see if there were any immediate red flags such as a culture fit issue or if I felt like the reason they left is too similar to the kind of environment that my org would be. We also had someone who told us that they had been working in a job where they weren't doing anything for years and proceeded to demonstrate a skills gap that led us to passing on that candidate.
Good vibes only, after all. Seriously, why should any person or employer in your background be above criticism?
I'm totally subscribing! That was so hilarious.
I would have not been able to hold a conversation without snuggling the turtle. I want to know more about Master Shifu!
That would have gotten you hired!
I didn't even realize the movie quote thing was like a neurodivergent thing. It's just something I do and every time someone catches the reference, an angel gets its wings.