Yes I agree. Took me 7 years to figure it out. But I'm out and he's right. I was one of those women to think I can wait it out. I finally said enough ...im wasting my time when I should be available for someone else. Please ladies. It's going to hurt but I'm getting through it and it's a relief. You gotta let him go.
@@ladytee2017 Girl you have to be strong ..its tough for me as well,,,but I just remember that this is not what I want and going back will start something all over again...i want so bad to break but I pray and pray and listen to a lot of videos like this one. It helps to have a hobby too...and girl get one of those vibrators lololol seriously. Omggg
I honestly feel sorry for Anyone else Going through this... it’s really hard admitting to yourself that the man you love don’t fwy like you think. 🤦🏽♀️
I can agree and also on a scientific level. Women just produce more oxytocin during intercourse and become more attached. That's why I think it's so important to wait, not because sexual intimacy isn't important, but it is for our own mental health and to whom we give our attachment and vulnerability to. Otherwise we may find ourselves in situations we didn't want, can't get out of, and can't get over. Unfortunately, I wish I was more educated in relationships and life in general since communication wasn't really a thing at home
He Is 100% right. Even sex wasn't part of the equation, a woman finding herself doing all the work and the same is not given in return, stop it. Good Morning texts, making plans for both of you, even checking on him, etc. You always the first or only one. This man can care less about u.
Youre my personal relationship counselor...you don't tell me what I want to hear but what I need to hear!!! My mind is changing because of you..God Bless 🙌🙌
I know I played myself. He told me from the jump he didn't want a relationship/commitment but for sixteen months I thought I could change him. It was seven months before we ever had sex. We necked a lot though. I bought him nice gifts and cooked for him and anything he needed I would be right there. I lost 35 pounds from 140 down to 105 from worrying about this man. I couldn't eat or sleep just wanting him. I finally had to look in the mirror and own that what was happening was my fault, not his. Why wouldn't he want to keep me around when everything he wanted was right there. He had wifey privileges without lifting a finger. If everything would have been the same as it was for the first three months when he was love-bombing me it would have been great but everything changed. So yes, you are right I played myself and I own that crap. I also learned a very valuable lesson too.
The key here is... you learned the lesson. IMO, heal from this. It will evolve you. Now you know what you don’t want.. you know how VALUABLE you are.. you are THE PRIZE. Wifey privileges are earned. .. yet, you got some good practice. Now, you are heading to the big leagues. Take your time, listen to what they show you.. make them earn you.... no matter what. Your heart is tooo amazing to accept anything less. POWER to you
When u go against what God tells us no sex before marriage this is what happens.. Ladies our Creator know us better than we know ourselves he knows women are emotional and when they give thier bodies to men they will be attached.. so wait for a man 👨 to marry u before giving ur body away for FREE99
@@81sexislim I guess this is funny since there is countless sexually transmitted diseases, unwanted pregnancy, dysfunctional toxic relationships, sex trafficking, prostitution, rape, molestation etc... And you are looking at THIS CHANNEL for what reason?
You’re absolutely right! Us women need to take responsibility for the men we choose to allow in our lives. Accepting crumbs when you know you’re hungry is never going to satiate you! Took me awhile, but now I’m excited to dig deep into how a man is right for me and showing those that aren’t the DOOR expeditiously (T.I. voice) 😂
I agree. We as women hold so much power but give it away. He can't do anything to us if we don't allow it. Stop giving husband benefits to f- boys! I wish more women would love themselves enough to know when to walk away.
Honest to GOD truth..You're stringing yourself along when you continue to deal with a man who lacks integrity & puts forth little to no effort toward you. 🙌🏾
Depends on the situation if he lied to you about wanting a relationship or marriage and it’s been like 3-6 months then yeah he’s stringing you along but if he flat out says he doesn’t want a relationship or get married and you stay with him knowing he doesn’t want one then that’s on you
@@shutit4024 Yes, a woman would be foolish and stringing herself along if she pursues a relationship with a man that has clearly stated that he doesn't want to be in one or he just may not want one with her. I've come to learn that when properly dating someone, & taking the right measures to get to know them you will be able to decipher what kind of character/integrity/ambition/intentions they possess. A man could indeed be stringing a woman along, & lying about wanting any type of serious commitment/marriage within a 3 to 6 month period.. but a woman should be aware & able to pick up on those signs/red flags early or else she is playing herself also.
Facts💯 and many women are determined to try and keep the guy even when he is deliberately showing her he doesn't want her. They are determined that HE is the one they want even when he doesn't want them.
I kicked him too the curb now he is telling me he likes me alot am more established than he is but he tried to make me feel bad by just texting n saying hi n then nothing for days then he calls n wants to chit chat I chased him away now he is stepping up I have moved on 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️😁😁😁👌 on on off I even cooked showed him my home n kicked him out 😁😁😁😁I blocked him out n that's it I am blessed
Having a real Relationship or marriage is very rare some of us will never run into that in this lifetime. Some Men and women have become lovers of themselves material things worldly possessions and all the wrong expectations on what love really is and should be.
Yes, many times we keep ourselves prisoners in a toxic situation and ignore the signs sent by our conscience and our body. God would not send a man to hurt or neglect you.
I needed to hear this today. My ex texted me today we have not seen each other in 6 weeks I knew what he wanted . After this video I decided not to return his text. I feel I deserve better and a guy who wants to make an effort for me.
Women are told by society that they need a man and men take advantage of their by dangling relationships like a carrot on a stick. I agree women need to learn their value and stop sleeping around.
@@winning3329 and here's the thing; these women are offering up EVERYTHING the man wants and they don't get what THEY want! It makes absolutely NO sense!🙄 As a feminine woman, I place my wants and needs HIGHER than giving a man what he wants. I want and need exclusivity, commitment, and eventually marriage. I want and need to be cherished by a man. And I know that I won't get that by giving him sexual gratification. I WILL get used, abused, and run through, so no thank you! 😂
i saw this quote on Instagram that said " 80% of the hurt we experience in life is self-inflicted" could'nt agree more. It took me a while to arrive to this realization!!!
Appreciate you saying that it can be traumatic being used sexually by a man you wanted more with. No one has ever said that before. If a lady knows shes cant afford the pain dont share sex so casually. Make sure its clear the gravity after agreeing what type of relationship is being built first. Observe his character over a extended period, and if he keeps his word on basic things.If not he wont honor your feelings on sex.
Mmm. Yeah, that is a great definition of it...the wild coyote and the road runner...very fitting how they just keep chasing like that...knowing they will never get to catch him. SMH!
I always say this to my friends “stop victimising yourself”. Stop playing the victim and accusing all men of being trash. Take responsibility, accept that you are responsible for how you’re treated and move the hell on. Oh, and do better next time.
This is deep, because I have always found it hard to let a guy go once he starts losing interest in me. Mainly I think it is because I am always seeking validation and want to make things work so bad that I end up not seeing the bigger picture. I end up looking like a foolish young lady who doesn`t see her value or see that there are lots of fishes in the sea. I love love and I want to experience the best of it so I have made it my goal to give the guy I currently love back to the streets of South Africa and of the whole world lol!!!!! So ladies remember who you are!!!
This sadly starts from the home in how parents treat their children and neglecting them so the behavior becomes repeated by the time they seek relationships with people.
I completely agree with what youre saying on everything. I had to look inside myself and introspect about the part i played in my past relationships and how i could have prevented everything had i loved myself the way I’m suppose to. Now i cut them off easily. However, i get sad realizing I’ve never been with a man who gave to me the way it give to others. It only took me a month to realize the last man i was dating was just too selfish for me. Now he wants back and Ive run away. I just hope i will find him one day. I just want what i give in return.
“You can screw like an adult film actress and it doesn’t matter, if a man doesn’t want to love he doesn’t want to love” 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽 ITS THAT PART FOR ME KEV SO 💯💯. Thanks for the videos ❤️
My relative is in a 40 year marriage in which her husband blatantly said he doesn't want her numerous times. She is still there cooking, and washing his clothes. smh...
@Lori Joy Fine Art Channel I know quite a few guys that are married & miserable but don't have enough courage/ backbone to file a divorce. Whether it's financial reasons or they don't want to start their life over again.
@@sophisticatedmm3632 We have told her, but she is still there. It is really sad seeing her in this zombie state. Her self-esteem is low, and she has dark bags under her eyes from stress. He does not even hide his mistress or ulterior motives anymore...
@Lori Joy Fine Art Channel No one talks about these dead-end marriages that survive for decades without any love. It is really depressing to watch. My relative has had 40-years of turmoil...outside kids, cheating, abuse, etc. And I am not just blaming him, because she is tolerating this behavior.
I went through this situation where I strung myself and I played myself now I'm single trying to love myself !! Thank you for posting this wished I watched this when I strung myself along so it would knock some sense into me but I guess everything happens for a reason.
🗣🗣 Kev - put this on a T-shirt, hat and a billboard. Life is about choices. If I have to choose between being single and asking a Man for love/affection - it will always be me❤ 💅
These are Senior citizen men that text their private talk Krazy ask do you gas. Just block them Unbelievable to get that old and don't know how to talk to a woman .. RUN from a confused man
I will not be a victim to my own circumstances.. I just tried to have a conversation about this to my bf and got nowhere but in that conversation he stated if walk he’ll understand but he will still do for our kids.. I told him ok.. Nothing else’s needed to be said.. If my worth is not good enough nevertheless of day then walking is the best option.. I tried to keep my family together but that’s not worth doing anymore. I wish him nothing but the best
What you say is correct, I agree, and I try to live this way. There is an additional factor to this, though. If a woman delays the physical to get him to know and care about you, the guy’s gone. I’ve experienced this over 12 yrs now, since my ex. What you’re saying fits the women that have sex early on. For those that wait, the men will be gone by date 2-3 in favor of cheap and easy, which is abundant. But this video is so good I might be sending it to the guys that act this way 😂
Yeah....just leave his text or call from him unresponded and remain this way .... He will come back to your inbox in one year or two, bt you will be with someone else by then ...
Even though it hurts to maybe hear, this is some real talk. Take it as a privilege that someone tells you they don’t want anything serious. But also if you’re looking for a serious relationship yourself, you need to be able to hear the truth and understand game. Slowing things down will help protect yourself. But it’s also dumb to keep giving yourself sexually to whoever, hoping and wishing that your cookie is going to change their minds. Just don’t boo. Have standards and practice those for yourself with patience towards yourself. YOU ARE THE PRIZE. Stop giving yourself freely and natively.
So true, for men and women. Honestly wish I had this wisdom sooner but it’s not too late for me to have an amazing life even now, thank goodness. Truth hurts, but acknowledging it and moving on really does free you up to find better.
That’s it’s Bruh we are stringing ourselves along! We are giving away our power! That means we are conforming to them and not getting what we want! To thine own self be true! 👍🏽
Amen! The start of correcting our own behaviors is admitting that we make mistakes. Declaring victimization only perpetuates staying stuck, not growing. Preach the truth.
It's the inconsistency for me. I'm not interested in anyone who shows me he's not. Next, I DON'T have sex with em ever. I'll never understand this 30, 60, 90 day rule either, as if my body is a benefit given to "all" who WAIT. THINK ABOUT IT. It's a game "some males" play in order to lay you down. They will wait you out or get inconsistent the moment you get consistent in order to get you to chase them and PROVE yourself(have sex). Those who seek validation and attention fall for it every time and YOU DON'T HAVE TO if you validate yourself....keep hope alive like Jessie Jackson...see where it got him...JS
Kev thank you again for making this video! Great reality check for a lot of people. If they are not putting in any effort they DON'T LIKE YOU. Thank you NEXTT
Kev is too real!... I can literally resonate with every single one of his perspectives... He is so different from every other coaches I have listened to. 💖💖a bunch!🤗 Whenever I listen to him, my head becomes clearer. He just takes that clog away from my mind. Other coaches make things complicated with theories and psychological calculations, but Kev?? He just says it as it is and they are the working truth of all times, darn!!! and so I switched to listening to him and him alone!💯👌🤗🤗
No hate to my mum, but she had a tendency constantly instill in me this need to overly support and encourage anyone in our lives no matter how many times they beat us down. She felt that we must not give up on them. I was always the type that any form of rejection from anyone would be met with a proper goodbye and be done with. From an early age I was taught to be a people pleaser and to string myself along. Taught! That bled over into my relationships. So now at 35, divorce pending, I am unlearning that behavior and learning to trust my instincts once more and not give people indefinite chances. I'm not cold, just less inclined to please. Main point, many us of have to unlearn some behaviors that even our parents didn't understand themselves. I'm grateful for your channel. It has truly been a big help in helping me to recognize toxic individuals and stop stringing myself along and dumping my own toxicity.
Preach. Woman lets be accountable. You dont have to convince people to care. Discuss ur needs- if he dont get it well leave within days or week. Ur only hurting urself. U are not a passenger in ur life. Drive that sucker!!!
Very true and I accept full responsibility at myself stringing myself along turned out i kept repeating same cycle and kept chasing love and accepted breadcrumbs because thats how i was chasing my mother 😒 finally healing from my childhood traumas and moving forward! I know im worthy !
I appreciate this video. I’ve come to realise that one reason I haven’t experienced love is because (on my part), my standards are too low. It’s frustrating because I genuinely didn’t know better. I know how to attract men but I noticed that they never love me. I didn’t know I was giving away my power. Now being burnt by men 3 times. Never again. I’ve started polishing myself (I let myself go) and losing interest quickly when men are lukewarm with me. I pray that my new sense of confidence gets me the results I want. 💕
Some women are slow when it comes to men when will they get that words mean nothing the real question is are you going to allow that man to string you along because they already know the answer to your question
The voice of reason in my ear. Sometimes I don't be wanting to click on the videos but I end up doing it because I know it's for my own good as well as friends that I know. Thank you for giving us the painful truth because it will help us in the long run!
I am really concerned at the slow pace this important channel is growing. After much thought I am convinced that it has something to do with UA-cam algorithms. A bit stupid if you ask me because I see so much unnecessary advertisements whenever I log in. Surely this channel holistically talks to a subject matter which falls under mental health, life, relationships, love etc, collectively. UA-cam could do better. With so many people seeking a better life I doubt many know of this channel and UA-cam should actively promote it.
Please...he has 263 subscribers. That has nothing to do with youtube not promoting and everything to do with his subscribers not liking and sharing. Off everyone liked shared and subscribed his would be further along by now. But that being said UA-cam does have crazy algorithms and the old UA-cam was much better.
It’s been 9 months and all of a sudden he started going 1-2 days without reaching out. I politely told him I was gone. We had been down that road years ago (this was an ex) and it all seemed like Deja vu. No thanks.
I know some girls that got junk pics and when the guys treated them badly, they just passed the pictures on lol crazy world. If a guy passes the 😬 pic to me, he's a loser 🙄👎
These vids with the hard truth are the most helpful!!! After watching several UA-cam vids, seeing things for what they actually are, & giving myself time, I’m finally over a past situation!! I’ll still click on vids like this because the content is so real & good! Thank you!
Even though you have not answered I would like to ask you to make a video about women attracting men sexually without wanting it. I dress very decently and conservative but I somehow always end up in a situation where the men only wants sexual contact. Why!?
To be honest I dont think its you...there will always be men who will try it on if your a nice charming and attractive person. The only way it's an issue is if they dont back off if told that your not interested again that's not done to you. Or if they get it every time they try, that's on you.
@@shieldoffaith7099 the problem is that I am very conservative. I want old fashioned marriage and I don't believe sex is a part of "knowing each other". It hurts even more because of my belief and values. It is not once or twice, it is quite often. I have been writing with a highly educated guy and I truely wanted it to work out so when I was asking about his personality he would be a bit irritated and tell me that he has only known me from fb which I understand but I don't understand why he would call at night to talk about sex.
Hunny I go through the same thing. Once you are not allowing yourself to get into a relationship with them, then you are good. Ignore them! Tell them that you are not interested.
Guys overall attraction is in the physical...most of it. So you do not have to Try to be sexy to even be sexy is you're a naturally attractive lady. People that do not dress conservative and dress loose...yes, they may just attract more looser type of men. Men that only will want to have sex with them, and nothing else. But as far as you...based on what you said...as far as just how you was dressing and presenting yourself physically, there's nothing you did wrong. Idk what you said or other things...but based on what you said, you are good. You just happened to attract the guy's that probably aren't looking for a relationship at the time. Most of us guys date very casually at first. We date more casual...women tend to mainly date with a purpose most of the time...or so it seems. It seems like 80/20 on both sides flipped. So you just have to keep searching until you find that 20% who's dating with a purpose...like me in my 30s now. Lol. Not me per se... but you get what I'm saying. Lol 😄
Yesss! He’s not stringing you along! It’s YOU stringing you along! 🤦🏽♀️
Exactly
Ladies stop putting these "men" on pedestals they dont deserve it, make them put the work in ladies be the lady that you are and love yourself
YES!!!!!!
Don't be friends with someone who lies to you about what they want though. You can't trust someone like that.
Yes I agree. Took me 7 years to figure it out. But I'm out and he's right. I was one of those women to think I can wait it out. I finally said enough ...im wasting my time when I should be available for someone else. Please ladies. It's going to hurt but I'm getting through it and it's a relief. You gotta let him go.
Yes I been thru this just got over a 6 year relationship that went no where
Thank you Kev much needed to hear this message😊
I'm trying.....and now its lockdown I get lonely...when I go quiet he wont leave me alone....help lol
@@ladytee2017
Girl you have to be strong ..its tough for me as well,,,but I just remember that this is not what I want and going back will start something all over again...i want so bad to break but I pray and pray and listen to a lot of videos like this one. It helps to have a hobby too...and girl get one of those vibrators lololol seriously. Omggg
@@arkitamichelle2770 In going to really try. He actually text me about 10 mins ago....I think I need a vibrator for real 😭😂😂😂
I honestly feel sorry for Anyone else
Going through this... it’s really hard admitting to yourself that the man you love don’t fwy like you think. 🤦🏽♀️
Live with?? Geez!!! 😬
He just read my damn story going through it today....smh I feel like I am being watched at this point. 🤦🏽♀️
Love*
@@TEE78SR Wow!
@@jayc.7135 😂😂😂 i meant love... i don’t Live with him
You’re the only one responsible for what you allow. Always remember that.
Yes!!!
Sex before marriage shouldn't be negotiable, the truth females got attached soo much and that's why it hurts💔
Amen to that! 🙌🏾
I can agree and also on a scientific level. Women just produce more oxytocin during intercourse and become more attached. That's why I think it's so important to wait, not because sexual intimacy isn't important, but it is for our own mental health and to whom we give our attachment and vulnerability to. Otherwise we may find ourselves in situations we didn't want, can't get out of, and can't get over. Unfortunately, I wish I was more educated in relationships and life in general since communication wasn't really a thing at home
@romanticide, You are so right 😟.
@Lori Joy Fine Art Channel I agree with both of you guys you both made very good points
Amen👏🏽
He Is 100% right.
Even sex wasn't part of the equation, a woman finding herself doing all the work and the same is not given in return, stop it.
Good Morning texts, making plans for both of you, even checking on him, etc. You always the first or only one. This man can care less about u.
You have let a man prove themselves to you. You are the prize 💕
Period
“Be the change you want to see in your life”
No Effort = No Interest. Period.
Lmao yeah
Youre my personal relationship counselor...you don't tell me what I want to hear but what I need to hear!!! My mind is changing because of you..God Bless 🙌🙌
I know I played myself. He told me from the jump he didn't want a relationship/commitment but for sixteen months I thought I could change him. It was seven months before we ever had sex. We necked a lot though. I bought him nice gifts and cooked for him and anything he needed I would be right there. I lost 35 pounds from 140 down to 105 from worrying about this man. I couldn't eat or sleep just wanting him. I finally had to look in the mirror and own that what was happening was my fault, not his. Why wouldn't he want to keep me around when everything he wanted was right there. He had wifey privileges without lifting a finger. If everything would have been the same as it was for the first three months when he was love-bombing me it would have been great but everything changed. So yes, you are right I played myself and I own that crap. I also learned a very valuable lesson too.
Damn g
Been there before sis
The key here is... you learned the lesson. IMO, heal from this. It will evolve you. Now you know what you don’t want.. you know how VALUABLE you are.. you are THE PRIZE. Wifey privileges are earned. .. yet, you got some good practice. Now, you are heading to the big leagues. Take your time, listen to what they show you.. make them earn you.... no matter what. Your heart is tooo amazing to accept anything less. POWER to you
As soon as I hear those words I know all I need to know " he is not the guy for me ".
Please don’t beat yourself up, you had to go through that. Give back by teaching other women. The last stage of healing is to help someone else
When u go against what God tells us no sex before marriage this is what happens.. Ladies our Creator know us better than we know ourselves he knows women are emotional and when they give thier bodies to men they will be attached.. so wait for a man 👨 to marry u before giving ur body away for FREE99
LOL
@@81sexislim I guess this is funny since there is countless sexually transmitted diseases, unwanted pregnancy, dysfunctional toxic relationships, sex trafficking, prostitution, rape, molestation etc... And you are looking at THIS CHANNEL for what reason?
@@constancereynolds3110 I was laughing cuz I agreed silly 🤔
@@constancereynolds3110 this has nothing to do w anything you just said Lmaoo
💥Boom💣💥Best comment and revelation!!!
You’re absolutely right! Us women need to take responsibility for the men we choose to allow in our lives. Accepting crumbs when you know you’re hungry is never going to satiate you! Took me awhile, but now I’m excited to dig deep into how a man is right for me and showing those that aren’t the DOOR expeditiously (T.I. voice) 😂
I agree. We as women hold so much power but give it away. He can't do anything to us if we don't allow it. Stop giving husband benefits to f- boys! I wish more women would love themselves enough to know when to walk away.
Honest to GOD truth..You're stringing yourself along when you continue to deal with a man who lacks integrity & puts forth little to no effort toward you. 🙌🏾
Yep, no time to be a victim anymore.
@@chrissy1448 Agreed Sis! You become a victim by choice and will continue to get what you allow.
Depends on the situation if he lied to you about wanting a relationship or marriage and it’s been like 3-6 months then yeah he’s stringing you along but if he flat out says he doesn’t want a relationship or get married and you stay with him knowing he doesn’t want one then that’s on you
@@shutit4024 Yes, a woman would be foolish and stringing herself along if she pursues a relationship with a man that has clearly stated that he doesn't want to be in one or he just may not want one with her.
I've come to learn that when properly dating someone, & taking the right measures to get to know them you will be able to decipher what kind of character/integrity/ambition/intentions they possess. A man could indeed be stringing a woman along, & lying about wanting any type of serious commitment/marriage within a 3 to 6 month period.. but a woman should be aware & able to pick up on those signs/red flags early or else she is playing herself also.
@@DynamicallyDC I agree
Facts💯 and many women are determined to try and keep the guy even when he is deliberately showing her he doesn't want her. They are determined that HE is the one they want even when he doesn't want them.
👍. Exactly. I am stringing myself along. He gave up on me a long time ago. Lol. Okay, I’m done, he can go.
In that order. ✌🏽
I kicked him too the curb now he is telling me he likes me alot am more established than he is but he tried to make me feel bad by just texting n saying hi n then nothing for days then he calls n wants to chit chat I chased him away now he is stepping up I have moved on 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️😁😁😁👌 on on off I even cooked showed him my home n kicked him out 😁😁😁😁I blocked him out n that's it I am blessed
period sis
ILL!!! Yeah, too much game playing for me. I'm good on that. Guys dont play games like that if they are really interested in you. So F him. Lol. IJS
I'm experiencing the same thing girl he was soon sweet at the beginning but now he neither calls or text he goes for days no message or calls
Not necessary
How can we not love this Man? Hes honest,he’s funny and he give it to us REAL❗️❤️❤️🔥🔥 I love your channel. Please NEVER
STOP MAKING VIDEOS.
No sex before marriage is the only way to weed them out ! 😃
Straight up
AMEN
Facts
Oh yes
No way. Imagine if they are shit in bed and then you’re stuck with him. Yikes.
Having a real Relationship or marriage is very rare some of us will never run into that in this lifetime. Some Men and women have become lovers of themselves material things worldly possessions and all the wrong expectations on what love really is and should be.
Whew! We need to spread this word like the gospel. Women, we need to shed our victim mentality in order to glow up.
🤣 yes! 💅🏻
Yes, many times we keep ourselves prisoners in a toxic situation and ignore the signs sent by our conscience and our body. God would not send a man to hurt or neglect you.
I needed to hear this today. My ex texted me today we have not seen each other in 6 weeks I knew what he wanted . After this video I decided not to return his text. I feel I deserve better and a guy who wants to make an effort for me.
This is why sex before marriage doesn’t work. There is a reason why God told us to wait
Yesssssssss
AGREED! When are women going to figure this one out!🙄
Women are told by society that they need a man and men take advantage of their by dangling relationships like a carrot on a stick.
I agree women need to learn their value and stop sleeping around.
@@winning3329 and here's the thing; these women are offering up EVERYTHING the man wants and they don't get what THEY want! It makes absolutely NO sense!🙄 As a feminine woman, I place my wants and needs HIGHER than giving a man what he wants. I want and need exclusivity, commitment, and eventually marriage. I want and need to be cherished by a man. And I know that I won't get that by giving him sexual gratification. I WILL get used, abused, and run through, so no thank you! 😂
I've been celibate over 3 years. I can weed them out quickly who are disingenuous.
i saw this quote on Instagram that said " 80% of the hurt we experience in life is self-inflicted" could'nt agree more. It took me a while to arrive to this realization!!!
Appreciate you saying that it can be traumatic being used sexually by a man you wanted more with. No one has ever said that before. If a lady knows shes cant afford the pain dont share sex so casually. Make sure its clear the gravity after agreeing what type of relationship is being built first. Observe his character over a extended period, and if he keeps his word on basic things.If not he wont honor your feelings on sex.
That is why i think i am done with dating. Tired of trying to figure guys out
Mmm. Yeah, that is a great definition of it...the wild coyote and the road runner...very fitting how they just keep chasing like that...knowing they will never get to catch him. SMH!
I always say this to my friends “stop victimising yourself”. Stop playing the victim and accusing all men of being trash. Take responsibility, accept that you are responsible for how you’re treated and move the hell on. Oh, and do better next time.
This is deep, because I have always found it hard to let a guy go once he starts losing interest in me. Mainly I think it is because I am always seeking validation and want to make things work so bad that I end up not seeing the bigger picture. I end up looking like a foolish young lady who doesn`t see her value or see that there are lots of fishes in the sea. I love love and I want to experience the best of it so I have made it my goal to give the guy I currently love back to the streets of South Africa and of the whole world lol!!!!!
So ladies remember who you are!!!
"Be the change you wish to see" ....yes!! Love that, Kevin Hicks!! Thank you.
This sadly starts from the home in how parents treat their children and neglecting them so the behavior becomes repeated by the time they seek relationships with people.
“Holding on to their ankles” 😂
I completely agree with what youre saying on everything. I had to look inside myself and introspect about the part i played in my past relationships and how i could have prevented everything had i loved myself the way I’m suppose to. Now i cut them off easily. However, i get sad realizing I’ve never been with a man who gave to me the way it give to others. It only took me a month to realize the last man i was dating was just too selfish for me. Now he wants back and Ive run away. I just hope i will find him one day. I just want what i give in return.
“You can screw like an adult film actress and it doesn’t matter, if a man doesn’t want to love he doesn’t want to love” 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽 ITS THAT PART FOR ME KEV SO 💯💯. Thanks for the videos ❤️
My relative is in a 40 year marriage in which her husband blatantly said he doesn't want her numerous times. She is still there cooking, and washing his clothes. smh...
Absolutely Absurd. She needs to leave, I don't want to be somewhere that I'm not wanted
@Lori Joy Fine Art Channel
I know quite a few guys that are married & miserable but don't have enough courage/ backbone to file a divorce. Whether it's financial reasons or they don't want to start their life over again.
@@sophisticatedmm3632 We have told her, but she is still there. It is really sad seeing her in this zombie state. Her self-esteem is low, and she has dark bags under her eyes from stress. He does not even hide his mistress or ulterior motives anymore...
@Lori Joy Fine Art Channel No one talks about these dead-end marriages that survive for decades without any love. It is really depressing to watch. My relative has had 40-years of turmoil...outside kids, cheating, abuse, etc. And I am not just blaming him, because she is tolerating this behavior.
@@sophisticatedmm3632 Yep it is sad. I can't deal with misery. I would cut my losses and leave. But I see a lot of folks in unhealthy marriages.
Yes I was stringing myself along. Even though I never gave it up
2020 ladies. We don't hold on, or chase.
Sir, you are so right on with this message. And I am one of those ladies that was stringing myself along .
Me to but no more
Whew been there done that 🙌🏾 Get out of that situation before you end up a single mother‼️
I went through this situation where I strung myself and I played myself now I'm single trying to love myself !! Thank you for posting this wished I watched this when I strung myself along so it would knock some sense into me but I guess everything happens for a reason.
You're not a rope or a chord. Don't let them drag you into misery.
🗣🗣 Kev - put this on a T-shirt, hat and a billboard. Life is about choices. If I have to choose between being single and asking a Man for love/affection - it will always be me❤ 💅
These are Senior citizen men that text their private talk Krazy ask do you gas. Just block them Unbelievable to get that old and don't know how to talk to a woman .. RUN from a confused man
This is real talk! Being an adult is being responsible for yourself, your actions, period. 👏👏👏
Going through this right now. Thanks for the words of truth and reassurance that I’m doing the right thing to take care of me.
I will not be a victim to my own circumstances.. I just tried to have a conversation about this to my bf and got nowhere but in that conversation he stated if walk he’ll understand but he will still do for our kids.. I told him ok.. Nothing else’s needed to be said.. If my worth is not good enough nevertheless of day then walking is the best option.. I tried to keep my family together but that’s not worth doing anymore. I wish him nothing but the best
👏
What you say is correct, I agree, and I try to live this way. There is an additional factor to this, though. If a woman delays the physical to get him to know and care about you, the guy’s gone. I’ve experienced this over 12 yrs now, since my ex. What you’re saying fits the women that have sex early on. For those that wait, the men will be gone by date 2-3 in favor of cheap and easy, which is abundant.
But this video is so good I might be sending it to the guys that act this way 😂
Most guys don't wait for sex but you know he's not the one.
@@brownshuga71 it gets depressing sometimes when they keep leaving. You wonder why none of them liked you 😂
Wow that is story of my life. But my 🐱 is not worth 3 dates and no commitment
Yeah....just leave his text or call from him unresponded and remain this way .... He will come back to your inbox in one year or two, bt you will be with someone else by then ...
They all do it !!
Even though it hurts to maybe hear, this is some real talk. Take it as a privilege that someone tells you they don’t want anything serious. But also if you’re looking for a serious relationship yourself, you need to be able to hear the truth and understand game. Slowing things down will help protect yourself. But it’s also dumb to keep giving yourself sexually to whoever, hoping and wishing that your cookie is going to change their minds. Just don’t boo. Have standards and practice those for yourself with patience towards yourself. YOU ARE THE PRIZE. Stop giving yourself freely and natively.
Omg, i see my faults, did that, and learned my lessons. Thank you for sharing such good, and straightforward advice. Keep up the great job.
So true, for men and women. Honestly wish I had this wisdom sooner but it’s not too late for me to have an amazing life even now, thank goodness. Truth hurts, but acknowledging it and moving on really does free you up to find better.
Double standards all the time... smh. Gotta love society.
That’s it’s Bruh we are stringing ourselves along! We are giving away our power! That means we are conforming to them and not getting what we want! To thine own self be true! 👍🏽
Amen! The start of correcting our own behaviors is admitting that we make mistakes. Declaring victimization only perpetuates staying stuck, not growing. Preach the truth.
It's the inconsistency for me. I'm not interested in anyone who shows me he's not. Next, I DON'T have sex with em ever. I'll never understand this 30, 60, 90 day rule either, as if my body is a benefit given to "all" who WAIT. THINK ABOUT IT. It's a game "some males" play in order to lay you down. They will wait you out or get inconsistent the moment you get consistent in order to get you to chase them and PROVE yourself(have sex). Those who seek validation and attention fall for it every time and YOU DON'T HAVE TO if you validate yourself....keep hope alive like Jessie Jackson...see where it got him...JS
If he cant make and keep agreements with you others in his life sure sign hes not ready for a relationship much less be mature & respectful sexually.
Kev thank you again for making this video! Great reality check for a lot of people. If they are not putting in any effort they DON'T LIKE YOU. Thank you NEXTT
Video on point...absolutely, people are actually victimizing themselves..
Kev is too real!... I can literally resonate with every single one of his perspectives... He is so different from every other coaches I have listened to. 💖💖a bunch!🤗
Whenever I listen to him, my head becomes clearer. He just takes that clog away from my mind. Other coaches make things complicated with theories and psychological calculations, but Kev?? He just says it as it is and they are the working truth of all times, darn!!! and so I switched to listening to him and him alone!💯👌🤗🤗
The truth hurts but we need it to bring better men in our lives. Good talk Kev!!
Bruh you are preaching! Have mercy!
No hate to my mum, but she had a tendency constantly instill in me this need to overly support and encourage anyone in our lives no matter how many times they beat us down. She felt that we must not give up on them. I was always the type that any form of rejection from anyone would be met with a proper goodbye and be done with.
From an early age I was taught to be a people pleaser and to string myself along.
Taught!
That bled over into my relationships. So now at 35, divorce pending, I am unlearning that behavior and learning to trust my instincts once more and not give people indefinite chances. I'm not cold, just less inclined to please.
Main point, many us of have to unlearn some behaviors that even our parents didn't understand themselves. I'm grateful for your channel. It has truly been a big help in helping me to recognize toxic individuals and stop stringing myself along and dumping my own toxicity.
Preach. Woman lets be accountable. You dont have to convince people to care. Discuss ur needs- if he dont get it well leave within days or week. Ur only hurting urself. U are not a passenger in ur life. Drive that sucker!!!
Men will keep running through you like red lights and keep driving. Women, stop following along for the ride.
Hi Kev your advice is so much like an older brother's advice to his sister. You are the best.
@@scorpionbeatlesgirl87 thank you
I needed to hear this
Very true and I accept full responsibility at myself stringing myself along turned out i kept repeating same cycle and kept chasing love and accepted breadcrumbs because thats how i was chasing my mother 😒 finally healing from my childhood traumas and moving forward! I know im worthy !
That’s why you get what you want and leave. No feelings.
Too many emotions isn’t good.
I gotta disagree on that one sis... cant go through life with a gaurded heart forever because you're afraid...
Good reality message Kev. Even for us grandma's
Brutally honest today Kev! Savage! 🙏❤️
I appreciate this video. I’ve come to realise that one reason I haven’t experienced love is because (on my part), my standards are too low. It’s frustrating because I genuinely didn’t know better. I know how to attract men but I noticed that they never love me. I didn’t know I was giving away my power. Now being burnt by men 3 times. Never again. I’ve started polishing myself (I let myself go) and losing interest quickly when men are lukewarm with me. I pray that my new sense of confidence gets me the results I want. 💕
I know a woman now being done that way and giving the man a car to use after running into him and a woman in he’s house!
FACTSSSS. omg it was harshhh but needed. During the talk i was like " 🙉🙉🙉. But it made me better.
I've always enjoyed your videos, but lately, your videos have been on point!!!! You're not playing. Great video, Excellent message!!!
💝CUT !!!! THAT !!!! 😂😂😂
"STRING" !! THEN !! RUN !!💝
Some women are slow when it comes to men when will they get that words mean nothing the real question is are you going to allow that man to string you along because they already know the answer to your question
The voice of reason in my ear. Sometimes I don't be wanting to click on the videos but I end up doing it because I know it's for my own good as well as friends that I know. Thank you for giving us the painful truth because it will help us in the long run!
YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY CORRECT!
Damn! This was some real s**t 💥
Tell the truth wise young Man.
Sometimes its the "Low effort Guy".
Great video! Almost every woman needs to hear this message!!
I absolutely LOVE how honest you are. Thank you for that. I really appreciate your advice.
U R right! Great reality check! We break our own hearts by holding on to what's not really there from a man!
This helped me. I am guilty of this. Thank you.
That's so true Kev! Thanks for keeping it real for us women..i refuse to be strung along!
I am really concerned at the slow pace this important channel is growing. After much thought I am convinced that it has something to do with UA-cam algorithms. A bit stupid if you ask me because I see so much unnecessary advertisements whenever I log in. Surely this channel holistically talks to a subject matter which falls under mental health, life, relationships, love etc, collectively. UA-cam could do better. With so many people seeking a better life I doubt many know of this channel and UA-cam should actively promote it.
Please...he has 263 subscribers. That has nothing to do with youtube not promoting and everything to do with his subscribers not liking and sharing. Off everyone liked shared and subscribed his would be further along by now. But that being said UA-cam does have crazy algorithms and the old UA-cam was much better.
@Lori Joy Fine Art Channel I forgive you for your lack of comprehension. I will not dwell on negativity on this platform. Have a good day.
Stop being so blatantly honest 😂 lol I love watching your videos, you're to the point and provide plenty of wake up calls ♥️🇺🇸
Kev, Keep coming through with the hard truth and speaking the truth in love 👏🏼.
Ouch! Kev just gut punched my a$$ lol I was stringing myself along!! 🤯🤯 thanks Kev, for the truth!
Kev you speaking the truth.
When he pulls out, chucks you a cloth and rolls over, he ain’t yo man!!
It’s been 9 months and all of a sudden he started going 1-2 days without reaching out. I politely told him I was gone. We had been down that road years ago (this was an ex) and it all seemed like Deja vu. No thanks.
You are sooo smart and sensitive!
Thank youuuu! These precious advices coming from A Man!
I know some girls that got junk pics and when the guys treated them badly, they just passed the pictures on lol crazy world. If a guy passes the 😬 pic to me, he's a loser 🙄👎
That is so cold! 😂😂😂
Just like T.G say stay off yo back
These vids with the hard truth are the most helpful!!! After watching several UA-cam vids, seeing things for what they actually are, & giving myself time, I’m finally over a past situation!! I’ll still click on vids like this because the content is so real & good! Thank you!
Even though you have not answered I would like to ask you to make a video about women attracting men sexually without wanting it. I dress very decently and conservative but I somehow always end up in a situation where the men only wants sexual contact. Why!?
To be honest I dont think its you...there will always be men who will try it on if your a nice charming and attractive person. The only way it's an issue is if they dont back off if told that your not interested again that's not done to you. Or if they get it every time they try, that's on you.
I have had the same situation. It sucks.
@@shieldoffaith7099 the problem is that I am very conservative. I want old fashioned marriage and I don't believe sex is a part of "knowing each other". It hurts even more because of my belief and values. It is not once or twice, it is quite often.
I have been writing with a highly educated guy and I truely wanted it to work out so when I was asking about his personality he would be a bit irritated and tell me that he has only known me from fb which I understand but I don't understand why he would call at night to talk about sex.
Hunny I go through the same thing. Once you are not allowing yourself to get into a relationship with them, then you are good. Ignore them! Tell them that you are not interested.
Guys overall attraction is in the physical...most of it. So you do not have to Try to be sexy to even be sexy is you're a naturally attractive lady.
People that do not dress conservative and dress loose...yes, they may just attract more looser type of men. Men that only will want to have sex with them, and nothing else. But as far as you...based on what you said...as far as just how you was dressing and presenting yourself physically, there's nothing you did wrong. Idk what you said or other things...but based on what you said, you are good. You just happened to attract the guy's that probably aren't looking for a relationship at the time. Most of us guys date very casually at first. We date more casual...women tend to mainly date with a purpose most of the time...or so it seems. It seems like 80/20 on both sides flipped. So you just have to keep searching until you find that 20% who's dating with a purpose...like me in my 30s now. Lol. Not me per se... but you get what I'm saying. Lol 😄