The Real Story of Jesus' Birth | Kevin Bridges: The Brand New Tour
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- Опубліковано 11 гру 2022
- Kevin's Debut Novel - The Black Dog - is out NOW.
Available on Amazon, at Waterstones, and all the book places.
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Joseph must have been a very VERY mentally strong individual.
Comedy superstar Kevin Bridges returns to the stage in 2018 with his sell out new show -- The Brand New Tour. The show was filmed as part of Kevin's UK and Ireland tour and his 19 night residency at the Glasgow Hydro.
It's written and performed by a comedian at the top of his game with Kevin giving his take on the modern world, social media, anxiety, religion, conversations with his dog and having Barack Obama as his support act.
This is by far Kevin's best show to date and really is a stand up masterclass.
Welcome to the OFFICIAL UA-cam channel of stand-up comedian Kevin Bridges. Where you can watch clips, compilations and full shows, along with more EXCLUSIVE content.
Subscribe to the channel here - bit.ly/3e93URd
Visit my website for future news and tour dates - www.kevinbridges.co.uk/.
#KevinBridges #StandUp #Comedy - Комедії
Doesn't matter how many times I see this clip, I enter up crying laughing, fucking genius writing Kevin
'I END up crying..'. How the devil does 'Enter up' make sense in English?
@@christopherwheeler688 obviously a typo you pedant, get a grip mate!
@@christopherwheeler688 maybe it was one of them very popular things called 'a typo' I wouldn't get too worked up mate.......or he could have just been off his tits and typingwith his forehead, we've all been there
@@christopherwheeler688lol be quiet I’m a Christian aswell but not a single part of this was offensive go to a Ricky gevais comment section
@@christopherwheeler688lol be quiet I’m a Christian aswell but not a single part of this was offensive go to a Ricky gevais comment section
This is by far one of my favourite stand up bits. Never gets old, no matter how many times I've watched it.
So good!
"Not a plasterer in Bethlehem made a penny" LMFAO
class,
Probs cos they lived in Nazareth lol
What's a plasterer
@@franklinmt3680 A person who puts plaster on walls. Back then they decorated walls too.
This is one of the best comedy segments I have ever seen. Well done Kev
so true
Mary's virgin explenation made joseph suspect upstairs neighbour
That's how i remember my planets
there are nine planets... you missed the "p" planet.
what is the "p" being suspected?😀
@@rob664664 Has Pluto been promoted back to planet status again?
@@thelibraryismyhappyplace1618 did my planets while at school in the 70s... and Pluto was still an A lister. Clearly someone hasn't read the 2006 memo on Pluto's demotion. Thanks for bringing me into current reality.
@@rob664664 I also learnt 9 planets back in the day. My nieces came home with new rhymes and mnemonics when the changeover happened.
Mary's virgin explanation made Joseph suspect upstairs neighbor's prick. There. Done. You're welcome, Pluto. Let's see the naysayers steal your glory now.
Having worked a number of sites, I can imagine the conversation being at least that bad. However I do think that any site would come back when he said about turning water into wine by asking why not beer.
I imagine the wine was Buckfast 😂😂😂
@@ocdmusic 😂😂😂 without a doubt!
Beer was an Egyptian thing at that time.
They would be like can you not make a Mans drink.
"Not a plasterer in Bethlehem made a penny out of Mary's announcement!!" Utter genius!!!
You're killing it Kev! Love it.
Joseph, the first simp
Fantastic! 😂👏👏👏
Love the way he skirts around blasphemy without it really being blasphemy. Far cleverer than straight up blasphemy!
Blasphemy 😂😂 in the age of reason
It's All truth about the sky Wizard stories made up by who exactly???
It is straight up blasphemy, ya weapon. That's what makes it funny ffs.
No such thing as blasphemy ...😊
Blasphemy is a victimless crime.
Jesus was supposed to be a carpenter but couldn't pull a nail out to save his life!
😆
@@BrotherChad 🤣
Too many splinters to endure afterwards. So Jesus remained nailed.
Dude!! I was watching this and just glanced down at the comment and almost wet myself ....belter lol
😂😭
Love this one, Kevin! It's always funnier when someone just calls a spade a spade and doesn't care about the candy-coated absurdity.
PS: Your accent broke UA-cam's closed captions! Hahahahah!!!
I noticed that. You'd better be able to understand Kevin's accent, because you're not getting shit for help from the captions LOL.
@@62swampboy62 he tones it down, down south; like Billy Connelly did. His original albums needed a translator.
Yeh... looking forward to his take on Mohammed becoming a prophet.
When you get cervical cancer, it will be a punishment from God
His accent becomes a running joke with chat show hosts. Jonathan Ross always brings it up every time he is on his show specially, every single time.
Pure genius. This is one of Kev's best ever.
I'm catholic and by all rights I should be well offended but that is absolute quality. I've seen it before but it always makes me laugh!
Hail hail
@@remyfriel4748 I don't know what that means but I'm sure its hilarious.
Why should you be offended? Your god is big enough to fight it's own battles and the world still seems to be spinning since Kev.I.N told these jokes so I guess the 'big guy' isn't too bothered by it all.
Totally agree 🎉❤
Somehow I don't think that either God or Jesus are/were Catholic so they won't be offended.
Greatly presented - very funny I guess the others on the building site couldnt rush home during lunch break to tell their wives about crazeee Mary... as they also had to wait for their wives to get home from junior high school too.
Perfect ....this tickled my almighty sense of humour over here this morning; a Monday morning at that! It went sailing off into the nebulous because I had something fun, something cleverly put together for our amusement and entertainment: God love you, Kevin Bridges!
[season's greetings from across the great oceans]
Lived over 2000 years ago and we still talk about him like we all knew him. Quite a guy that Jesus.
Aye, pretty good going for a fictional fairy tale character right enough.
Thank u for helping start the day little less heavy....this is absolutely superb
This had me absolutely crying laughing last night. One of the funniest things I've ever seen 😂👏🏼
This is hilarious, thanks for making me literally laugh out loud x
First time I've seen this - best yet! Literally, nearly pished masen. Fkin brillyant Kevin!
Genius writing. Right up to the line yet never over. Point made perfectly too.
Not according to the whiny God-botherers in the comments...
"Joseph, I got impregnated by God"
"Didgye, aye?"....
I love Kevin Bridges and this is a great routine. I'm sure he wouldn't mind me pointing out that at least some of the inspiration must have come from 'The Crucifixion' by Billy Connolly from 1974.
I was thinking the same thing.
Fabulous 🤣🤣🤣
Actually tremendous standard of quality this guy keeps up
One of the best stand up routines ever !
😂👏😂👏 The wee man
Brilliant Kev,👍 Now do one on Mohammad.
Comedians have not got the bollocks to go there. They no what will happen.
@@theunionofjackbeanie2464 spot on mate, pretending to be edgy but actually on safe ground. Although I did laugh. If there was such a thing as Christian fundamentalists here ,he wouldn’t have opened his mouth.
@@bigbird6039 Totally agree. Good that you pointed it out.
As an Englishman I love Kev taking the piss out of my country and the fools who run it 👍😃
Does he do a different routine when he’s playing Wales, N Ireland or Ireland where he jokes about their country and those in charge?
No one in Wales or NI are in charge of their country Nige.
@@ianmacewan9416 Or England.
Nah. We all think you're cunts 😉
Just love this episode... Its hilarious😂😂😂
you kill me dude !!
That's a new and original take on the virgin birth story.
It seems so ripe for comedy, yet I've never seen it presented in this way before. lol
I really hope he stretches that routine out beyond this meagre clip, so much so I'm now going to seek out & watch the entire thing! 😁
Job done, Kev!
Not only a great ad for your video, but I've now subscribed to your UA-cam channel and intend to follow you on twitter, if I don't already! lol*
*I probably do, tbh! 😁
love you Kevin Bridges from New Zealand
This is one of his best.
This might be one of the smartest and funniest jokes ever told.
Kevin Bridges. You're an absolute fucking legend. There's something in that Glaswegian water.
It's called Scotch Whiskey.
@@Firedog-ny3cq I hope Scotland stay in the UK. They are just the best, hard working salt of the earth people. With the greatest sense of humour. It would be like your favourite, funny as fuck uncle dying in front of you to a bear mauling.
A great single malt to try. "The Singleton" cracking sip.
@@Firedog-ny3cq I think you mean a "Botla Bucky "
In tears! Brilliant. I'm going to send this video all over the place. Thanks Mr KB.
Big Jesus fan. That was great. Pretty much exactly what everyone would have thought then. Considered preaching???
Kevin bridges and now the much missed Sean lock , best we’ve had for years I think
This man allows me to go to bed with a smile.....funny as fuck
Funniest bloody comedy sketch I’ve ever heard!
Absolutely dead 😂
You, literally make my life livable, funny as fuck....thank you😅😅
Merry Christmas 🎁🎄
Could you imagine the staying power Mary had to have to keep that story going for so long 😮
On the money, Mr Bridges 🙂
Blasphemously beautiful. Better than anything you'd find in the Wholly Babble or the Buy Bull.
This is hilarious!!!!
This has to be the most brilliant segment of stand up comedy ever written and executed
It's good, but for me the "bus stop" story has the edge 😂
Look for 'The Cricifixion' by Billy Connolly. It's this on steroids.
Bus stop is the OG!
Too think we all were brainwashed by these extraordinary stories..
Good point
Quality 😝🍻
Crying, brilliant
This needs to be made into a film 🤣
Hilarious!
I'm absolutely scunnered was meant go see him in November there daughter got tickets Xmas last year . I couldn't go had let daughter n her pal go see him .. il be there next time but defo .. pride of Glasgow. Our very own kev.i.n bridges absolute legend.. and good TIM LOL HAILHAIL
I think the comedian whose work most has ‘actual genius’ written on it is Kevin Bridges. This is the purest humour.
Sam Kinnison called - wants his bit back.
3:58 and 4:31 killed me and never fail to make me laugh 😂
A god sized green hat 😂😂😂 on which 10000 alpacas tap dance...
We know with some degree of accuracy when “John the Baptist” was born, thus from that fact We can deductively reason that Jesus was actually born in late September.
We don't 'know' anything about Jesus. Most likely a myth or a compilation of different tales about different people.
It's all bullshit anyways.
"As shepherd's watched their flocks by night "
I love this guy....
Man I wish he would come to Texas! Or if I could see him in the UK somewhere
That joke in Texas? Do you want Kevin dead mate?
@@vishavkishore Of course not! But nah he can do that joke in the big cities lol i wouldn't recommend going anywhere else 😅
@@vishavkishoreatheist community of Austin Texas...😉😉😉
If he came out with this trash in Texas, he would be going home in a body bag
@@MB-eg3fi it's possible, but I doubt the radical christians would come to see him anyway
That was hilarious
What a F&#@ing star!!!
This is brilliant 😆
Good set
Mary was heard "Oh God!!"
Genius
This is how 16 years old boy for Glasgow looks. 🤣
Absolutely BRILLIANT!!!!
Love this guy batting away at Jesus, looking forward to his routine hammering Allah I believe he’s studying the Koran at the moment for material
He js batting away at Joseph. Also "Allah" is word for god, same god as in this story. Also Mary, Joseph and Jesus are part of Islam and koran
@@alasarcher400 And the story is nonsense whoever tells it.
@@alasarcher400 who taught you that?
@@user-sz5lr3lb7i which part?
Hahahahahahahahahaha classic and makes sense 😅
Let's see him do a skit about Mohamed
Brilliant.
Baaaah haah ha! So good 👌🏻 My favourite kind of Christmas content, taking the piss out of the reason for it's existence
⛪🖕🏻😂
To have the bridge between where our understanding stops and our belief continues is Faith. The good part is go 33 years later and the Son in Question only goes and rises from the dead after a public execution which may of had some saying "Naa naa naa that is CGI mate!" only to have onlookers of the day say " CGI! What on Gods' Green Earth is CGI" for them to say " I don't really understand it but I have faith that is what we are looking at it must be GCI no body has come back from death before!"
lol
Your heavenly brother Lord of the Apocalypse Charles Andrew Oyedele Ososami.
With the grace and for the glory of God
1
Peace.
Only "Christmas" is made up by the Christians. The reason YULE exists is ancient, pagan and based on the winter solstice, not anything Christian. As always, they appropriate other festivals to pretend it's theirs and just like their bible, nobody bothered to erase the plot holes to at least make the lie make sense! 😂
@@godalmighty5331 psycho patter
@@LadyAxe13 it's a well know saying that pretty women get away with murder non the less we are on the 1098th day of the Apocalypse in the Revelation of God. You'll only need to click my profile to see a screenshot of the Apocalypse announcement on 11th of December 2019 3 years 1 day ago. Christmas day is the 1111th day all credit to our creator maker of the Holy Bible.
When it comes to Yule Tide , I learned that the Yule log was soaked in Oil and then lit to see how long it would burn.. #Yulelog
Cheers
and hey plot holes well sometime it's gaps in our understanding but either way. Our intention has more volume than our action so if you feel its the right good thing to do or say then hurray! your going the right way.
1
xx
Peace
@@godalmighty5331 where as I don't share your faith, it would be rude of me and unfair to castigate you for yours. I know the spiritual path if not the religious one. I understand the need to look for signs in numbers, feathers , other associated signs. However any interpretation of god by man is sure to be flawed and therefore better that you come to meet the creator in your own context than the context of others. The bible, is just a book,written by man and so distorted by man. Any attempt by man to understand the divine is like an ant attempting to contemplate the mona Lisa. However I will reflect and share with you the peace.
That accent & that niffty suit (tailored to fit)👏
Love the guy
Really funny. When/where are his routines for the other religious icons? I bet they are a hoot!
You got any material on those religions that people will get?
@@huwguyver4208 Sorry Huw, is that aimed at me? If it is, I'm not a comedian, though I do know some jokes. Just none in his league!
He grew up in a Christian environment ya melt. Give over.
Mary was only a kid, she probably didn't know anything about pregnancy until it happened.
Joseph wasn't keen on paying maintenance so just went along with it.
This guy is so clever.
Come on we find a blind cnt watch this one 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
kev I am. Aye!!!!!
hilarious, just hilarious
It was the ........ "Ejaculate Conception" ????????
😂😂😂
Jesus walked into a hotel, slapped a bunch of nails on the reception counter and said “can you put me up for the night”
In very poor taste. Have you any Mohammed jokes?
Enjoy this sketch while its on here....I give it a week before its removed
One of KB finest moments pure genius
Probably a Brickys the gods of the building trade
Wake up the wee man🤣🤣
Jesus went to the inn with a box of nails and said to the innkeeper "can you put me up for the night".😂
Very poor taste. Have you any jokes about Mohammed?
@@robrenwick4591 yep, he was a paedo, oh wait 🤔 that's not a joke that's the truth.
As tedious as it is that Kevin keeps uploading the same clips from his gigs, this segment is always gas. Tied with the Friends Like Greece and Bus Stop stories
Wee hoose rice completes the set
Trolling up with skinny kev in the pic
😂 the best about 💯
Great act Kevin. Now lets see you do the the same for the fella from the Horn of Arabia
YAWWWN, Comedy has to be relevant to the understanding of the audience. Why the fk would He make the jokes about a religion the audience barely understands? Also, He is a comedian, not a preacher or political commentator .
@@manu-tonyo9654 Good cop out! That's how you chicken out of a conversation. The reality is! He said something about Islam.. he'd be hunted! Plain and simple! They donot tolerate bullshit about Islam! God on them I say!
@@manu-tonyo9654 Oh everyone understands the world's most intolerant superstitious beliefs system and the quisling apologists who jump to excuse it.
Why should he? Jesus, Mary and Joseph and the virgin birth are also in the Quran, so with this sketch he's also poking fun at Islamic beliefs.
We know he's not poking fun at any Islamic beliefs here. Just like every other supposedly irreverent comedian or rebellious musician who will go to town on Christianity, he daren't go anywhere near a certain other religion with the same disrespect because he hasn't the balls. By the way, I'm not religious in any way myself.
Tooooo funny. And probably closer to the truth.
Been saying this for 40 years
I love Sweaty humour! 😂
Kevin is so funny 😂😂
People say Jesus had no vices, he was a carpenter of course he had vices
I just wonder what wacky backy they smoked in those days.😅😅
I bet Jesus was on that cross thinking Joe wouldn't have asked him to die for anyone's sins.
Respect to Mary for the long haul;
teaching Jesus magic tricks, and actually making him start a religion, and convince people he's the son of said supposed father in the sky.
We can conclude from this, however... that either the milkman or the postman is God.
It was the shepherd.
I am putting your photo on a paedophile hunting website
Except they wrote about his coming in the old testament. No religion was started with the birth of the saviour; he only explained that the way to God was through him. The first time people actually started referring to themselves as anything other than Jews following Christ was around 200AD, and even until 400AD the term 'Christian' didn't come up. Me thinks you should brush up on your history, because even objectively speaking your heresy isnt substantiated to any reasonable degree. Next!