Exactly said! 👍 Totally agree most of them are same. I appreciate mother in law who treats daughter in law as a, family. Really bow, down to such humans!
What about things we get to hear constantly..how to stop hearing.Even if we don't react and do our duties silently still they find some or the other things to point out. It affects our mental health. After hearing so much, You start questioning your abilities. There was a time when I started thinking I am not good enough.
Totally agree. But that silence also they can't take it from us. They go mad till we, react. Oscar winning roles by these people. Most of the cases not all!
My mother is law is super clever , great actress , and tries always to help , she is a monitor of the house , she knows here you put your dirty underwear , controlling means - knowing all , observing all..... and making little comments in order to help.... and makes herself a victim ...coz she does all with love......
Same! I feel it would be better if she just directly fights to me instead of drama. I'm a straight forward person i can't just deal with this type of people
So many times I feel , in today’s world,when most of the women are given the privilege of their choice and identity.A woman only treats other woman so badly and disrespectful way that I feel what is the essence of celebrating the Woman’s Day. ? ? ?
My mother in law decides the way i should dress. I wear pretty decent dress i don't like wearing lot of jewels. Whenever i get ready for a function, she'll come and say don't you have anything better to wear? Can't you wear more jewels? Idk it's irritating. My husband doesn't say anything about my dress. Then i understood, she just wants me to have a low self esteem. Even if i cook tasty she'll say it's but u should have done that or this. Giving opinion in everything . She wants me to be her little puppet😊
That's my story too. Usually what I do is, I say this is what I like or want. We should keep our boundaries strong no matter how many times they tell the same thing trying to manipulate us but in an assertive way.
My mother in law is a mental patient.. emotional blackmailer.. such a selfish woman who doesn't love her son at all bcz she afraid her daughter in law takes away her son from him
My hindu mother in law came to uk in 1963, and brought all her ideals with her. When my husband got married to me in 1994, she soon started to behave like those bossy, rude, entitled Bollywood types tyrants. I packed my bags and went back to my flat. Her son followed me. The rest is history. This is the modern world. People have human rights. Slavery was abolished. The old fashion way of treating daughters in laws is CRUEL and is nothing more than slavery.
I got married in 2019, my mother in law has still not changed in 4.5 years...she still wants to rule the kitchen and her son. She still plans trips without me with her son. Whenever I have a fight with my husband, she would take him out on a trip
I use to do that.. pray when will my mil be gone. But it never made any difference until I started praying for my happiness. Why pray for something negative for others. Why not pray for something positive for ourselves.
Do you think middle class in laws torture their daughters in law? Do middle class men cheat? There is a perception that middle class people are nicer because they have values, is it true?
As a mother of 1 son, I understood the feeling of a mother. I think, it all depends with mind set and the environment. These mother became also a wife and they also suffered from abusive MIL, and now they're doing it as a revenge of their past experience. I thinks This has to be stopped by educating and counseling. Not because they're mother, and they have all the rights, or Better keep their son, no need to marry. And also to DIL, don't give up easily, coz once you become a mother you will understand, but it doesn't mean you will do the same as your MIL treats you, instead help your son and his wife to grow, because their success will be your success. If they failed, it's also your failure. This has to be done by a positive and smart mind set. Amazing and joyful environment gives long life while Unhealthy behaviour and habits shorten life. God bless.
How do you know? Sometimes they learn it from their own mothers, how they were raised I seen my exes grandma and his mother. Man both of them are the same, I’m so annoyed
If a mother in law stops behaving like the owner of a daughter in law, half the mess is gone. I dont know how they start feeling like they adopted an orphan helpless girl and they have full control over her. Its the fault of the parents who 'give away' their daughter on the pretext of some traidition. Everybody treats the a woman like a property. If this stops, all the mess will stop.
Mam if mother in laws think like you. Than the earth will be a heaven place for every daughter in law. But unfortunately situation is completely different. Mother in laws made puppy to his son and after marriage they completely ruined daughter in law life.
They put their whole efforts to keep their son against DIL so that there will be no strong bonding between the two and their relationship will jump out the window
Yes exactly and mine turned disgusting after she started living with us. My husband and I, we have love marriage but now I don't even want my husband to touch me. I hate him so much. Everything his mother says and does, he always says to ignore her comments and behaviour because she doesn't know what she's saying according to him. He keep insisting me to talk to her over the phone. She made my pregnancy days hell and due to that behaviour she lost the respect which she used to get. I hate my husband and his family. I don't even want to talk to my husband on any topic apart from our baby's health.
I know the fact . Just clear one theory in mind that if you go against nature , you gonna face obstracles . every spacies in the world separate from father and mother after maturity and this is the nature . We Indians know the practical things lately .
I am in an abusive marriage where my mother in law wants me to be her replica, I don't idealise her based on the choices she made in her life. All her children are suffering from bad marriages after her advice. My husband listens to her all the time and our discussions does not remain all between us. I wanted a companion but I am getting an ignorant man who is just concerned about his mother and siblings. I did everything to make him happy - cooking, cleaning, giving him massages, serving him with utmost care but I got nothing but disrespect. I still feel honestly that if he stops following the guidance of his mother we can live happily. Venting out from my system because there is nobody with whom I can share.
You are completely right because my brother is living in your husband’s scenario right now. And I had to cut out the “guidance” from my mother because it was fruitless and only continued to hurt people, and her advice undoubtedly fails every time. Im not sure how his mother is, but mine acts selfishly because of a lack of foundation, she’s in survival mode, spirituality goes right over her head. And this is why I give her grace, yet again and again, I do not want to concern myself with even my own mother because I see the consequences of her actions.
I listened to my mother about only a few things before I was married to my wife, but even that harmed my relationship with my wife. A man should not have to report to his original family about the new family he started when he departed from them. They are in no intellectual position to propose anything to you. He must come to realize that his mother is not doing the right thing and he must adjust. I, having that similar mother, am in a difficult position. But most the time, I do not want anything to do with her energy because it brings us all down, even if she is my mother. My mother should want me to grow and thrive and be happy, and if she interferes with such, she doesn’t want my best! So therefore it is best to distance yourself, I don’t want to burn the bridge, but with so much continual drama, I think of it.
I apologize if this is too much! But my wife was in the same position you are, trying to everything she could to support me and help me and I would disrespect her because I felt that there was too much pressure on my life. I should have realized, at the time, that a boy listens to his mother but a man listens to his spirit, this is my opinion. We as men must graduate from this to be liberated from it mentally, but the mother in law will still be there doing the same old thing. It is then you decide what you’d like to do. My wife had many difficult conversations with me and she’d be mad at me and rightfully so! Drama is not needed and it’s not beneficial. It is not auspicious to hang around in a snake pit unless you know how to convert venom into nectar. But sometimes I don’t feel like doing such intense practice! You are not locked in, you both have a choice. Again sorry for so much text but this spoke to me because I’ve lived it and am still living through it. The holidays were good with her, which is a step in the right direction. But we could tell it was hard for her in the beginning, but she was trying to absolve the wound and trying is all you can hope for in someone sometimes. Much love
The only way to deal with narcissistic people is to behave narcissistically with them. That's the only boundary they understand but don't do that fully. Be a very sweet narcissist.
In laws should allow the young couple to stay separatly after marriage .Let them lead their life and be happy. In laws blessings is required not their control. Daughter in law is a daughter. Give your love and support to their families and maintain the healthy relationship till the end for the well being of all.
Please help!! My mom is destroying my relationship with wife. She is too much dominating. I cant leave her as she is old and how can she take care of herself. It will be rude. I hope god gives strength to my wife to take all this shit.
You can't do anything, just watch your life destroying, You might thing it will be over in a year or two but till then your wife will be changed. Either give birth to a female child or if you want boy, bring 2. Because being a single son is not easy
@@Abhishek.ranjan don't tolerate your mother's shit . Take care of her but ignore her tantrums . Tell her if she doesn't stay in boundary then you will be forced to leave the home .
Even I have mother but she will never support to the wrong things My husband is not loyal to me and his mother is supporting to him Is this role of a mother ? My mother in law is very very very kanjus and don’t know what is her agenda for our marriage life From the beginning she just want us to be separated Yuk family i got
Sometimes I wish to disappear from this world... I don't have an energy to stop the way she's treating me... My best advice please marry someone who doesn't have mom and dad/ better stay single....i promised my mom to marry him. But i feel regret now. Sometimes I feel working under the law of a slave. There is no love and care 🥺I miss my Singlehood life.... 😭😭😭i never treated anyone badly in my life.. But why my life is 🙂🙂🙂am I sinful soul
Same here😭. Always she taunts me about my things which i have brought from my father's house.. But when anyone is there then she treats me like i am her daughter to show other people that she is so humble and nicest mother in law😢. But always she demands money from us and she doesn't even want a single paisa invest on me by her son. 😭😭😭😭. There are many things which i can't explain.why a mother have 2 character. Why i dont understand. All say mother is greatest than anything then why she (mother) have 2face😞😭
I am about to marry a man with toxic in-laws who wants to live in our home. I don't speak their language, they don't speak mine nor English. I am so sad of knowing I need to let him go, if he doesn't put me first. But he won't. He will give all his resources to them, allow me to be in a house where I can't understand what they are talking about. Expecting me to carry on with all home duties and work and learn their language. I feel exhausted of just thinking about that. If you read this comment, give your opinion. I am really in love with this individual, but I can't stand the future. I just want to have our own family, not interference. Is it that healthy. I live in Ireland and my future in- laws don't work. I would love to have two children and work part time to be with them and help them grow. Is it selfish?
Same here I miss my single life mine was love marriage..I didn't think about consequences before the marriage..my husband is not lovable as before he loves his mom more than anything and I come secondary for him..he loves me but somewhere in his mind.. I'm fed with my new life and I hate staying at my husband Home..it feels like I'm in a concentration camp..i can't adjust with my mother in law she's rude and judgemental and sometimes I feel like a slave working there..and when I complain my husband gets angry on me and shout at me and I try to make him calm because I stay there's house...it feels like killing myself...I just want to die and started to hate my new married Life...worst ever.. after marriage girl going husband's house system must be banned first....I miss my home ..but no longer I will keep this silence..
Dear my heart goes out to all of you. I know the feeling being treated like a slave. 😔 Never do the mistake of hurting ur self. I know what u are feeling and going through. I lived with my mil who was double faced. She use to bitch at the back of me and in front acting as if she never say anything bad about me. I use to tell my husband abt her and he always turns around and tell me “just keep quiet she is old and dont know what she is saying”. I had 1 child and was also working. Morning had to wake up early make breakfast for mil, shower the little baby feed and put to sleep before going to work. After coming back make dinner, clean and get baby ready for bed and feed baby. After baby sleep ill go and clean the kitchen. It was a hell for me, when my husband use to come back after work, eat and sleep. I had never talked back to my mil. If she use to fight with me i use to just go in the room and sit there. My room was the only place I could find peace. When my little girl was 4yo my husband had a stroke. He couldn’t walk or eat himself. He only depended on me while his mother sits in front of him feeling discussed seeing his food coming out of his mouth covering his tshirt. Being a mother she could say that for her son.. after a few months my mil was diagnosed with breast cancer and she had to go for therapy. Now not 1 but there were 2 people that i had to take care of not including my little girl that was not getting the love and care that im suppose to give her. Then came covid and lockdown. That when I started going down until i felt like killing my self. But I couldn’t let my loved once my mother and sisters and my little girl to suffer for something that is not my fault. That when i told my self let see. Every time i go to temple the priest will say god always help those who believe in him. Lets see if god really come to help me. I prayed every day before even i go out of the room ill pray and ill ask for my and my little girl’s happiness and freedom to live how we want and no one to tell us what we are supposed to do. When i use to pray ill always imagine me and my daughter happy living in the house and just the 2 of us. I use to even get angry with god especially on those days when i am frustrated. But i still continue doing my prayers. I took it as a test of loyalty towards god. This went on for 4yrs. Husbands condition got worse and my mil cancer spread to her heart. She had blood and pus coming out from her cancer tumour which i had to do dressing for her. My mil got weaker and her sister came to stay with us to be there with my mil. When i will take mil to toilet in the morning mil sister use to quickly go out of the room because she dont want to help me to open mil dyper. After mil shower ill go and clean husband and give him breakfast. While mil and her sister sitting on the dining table eating breakfast and gossiping about me. Shit, blood, pus and urine all i clean and still she will talk bad about me. Best part while all this happening i got to know my husband was having affair with his cousin sister and this was going on since before i got married. What was I suppose to do in this situation. I was very frustrated felt like leaving the house but then thinking of my mother, what not people are going to tell her. What people are going to see is i left a disabled husband to suffer because i dont want to take care of him. No 1 is going to think from my point of view. Months passed by mil became weaker and had to take her to hospital. After 2 days she was supported to come back home and on that day morning she passed away. Many people would have thought i am happy that she is gone but the truth was i felt very bad for her. Her final days where she could do prayers and ask for forgiveness she spent gossiping. After mil passed away husband also passed away. I wouldn’t say i was happy but it felt a bit relieved that i dont need to go through the hell that i did for the past few years and now im able to give the love that my daughter deserves. I can give my 100% concentration to her. I could decorate the house how i want to which I couldn’t do before. The only thing that gave me the courage to wake up every day and go through it again and again was PRAYERS, BELIEVE IN GOD THAT HAPPINESS WILL COME and a friend whom i never meet before. I started chatting with a friend online. I use to tell her everything that i feel.. all my frustration and anger i use to tell her. She use to tell me not to keep anything in my heart if i feel angry then just let all the anger out to her. It was a relief for me to talk to someone that dont know me who will not judge me and will just listen to me when i needed her. Again ill advice you never ever again think of taking your life. If you are not the bad person then why should you suffer or why should your loved once suffer. Will anything change if you kill your self. Take this as your past karma that you have to go through and the only way to ease it is by praying. If you need someone to talk to or let your frustration out message me, talk to me.. i have gone through it.. i know what you feel.. imagine you going through a dark tunnel, you will reach to the other end only if you dont stop walking. Ill pray for you, for god to give you the strength and for your happiness.. 🙏🏼 ♥️
I have came to my mil living for 1 and 1/2 day not even two days she makes my life hell in 36 hours I can't even sit on chair can turn on the fan can't even looked at the window she is driving me crazy I didn't even eat for 36 hours keep crying and thinking it's all my fault I don't know I don't feel like living
Sadhguru spoke a lot here without saying anything really. I guess people will hear what they want to hear and be satisfied if you say it in a tone that signals what you are saying is profound and mysterious.
I am American and I just avoid my mother in law. Ok I honestly think she's jealous too of my looks and I'm full of life and funny. She's boring and not very pretty. ❤ But I just be nice and ignore her. You can't let others get a reaction out of you. I really have just cut her off. My hubby goes over there with kids but I refuse because I'm tired of putting effort into relationships. I always put my all into relationships and nothing back. It's a common theme of my life. I've since then cut most of my own family off too. They are toxic jealous of me and on drugs. I just can't with any of them me and my boys are so 😊 happy. We don't have to deal with family lol from either side. I work weekends and my hubby goes over there but I am at work. He works during the week but I about to work a second job during week too while kids are at school. ❤❤❤ I love avoiding people I am the definition of anti social.
@@Liii-44 i don't care about looks I've gained weight and now lost 27 lbs my mother in law cares too much. She's getting older too so I'm sure it sucks. I'll be old soon too. But I am not comparing myself to others like her. I just be happy with what I have.
Am trying the same. In the very initial stage of my marriage and I tried my level best to be all nice and sweet, but then I realized she's taking my sweetness to be a ticket pass to invade into our bedroom and interfere in our conversations. This infuriated me, and I voiced it out as a concern. Now all I can hear is my husband and her having a bad fight. I feel guilty starting it but I would ever horrible if she continued this behavior. I have no idea why am typing this down here but I really want this out of my system.
I met my ex ,who was divorced because of his mother already, ended up splitting with me too because of his mother. She has groomed him to be a mummys boy since he was small ..she is twice divorced herself and controls my ex who turns 50 next year! He will never change and neither will she. They have an enmeshed relationship and ge takes care of her. Even when she travels, he will still do her bidding.
This material acts as a catalyst for personal growth and expanded perspectives. A book with like-minded subjects transformed my outlook. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
They attack their sons love for his wife. They are working from a place of control and jealousy. Toxic and abusive is what most of them are. Not all but most!
Mother-in-law who tourchers her daughter in law in all the way and make her insecure feel and give her pain and tears the same thing in happen to her own daughter karma is working instantly....
I was searching many books and online content for this... Unfortunately there is no books or classses for this... Many family are suffering due to this
My mother in law is witch as a mother in law but she was daughter in law once she used to be a witch daughter in law even though her mother in law was good
@@ranjitdhinsa8603 lol, there is nothing more important than being a mother in law. That is what nature is created you for( transmit your genetic information and contribute to the survival of human being) by mating with a man that your mother in law created , Not to be a doctor, a lawyer or a rich woman or anything else ( that is created by man to assist in the survival and better genetic selection). 😂😂
This confuses me. Just how moms don’t have favorite children and love them all equally. When one of my sons friends, a young lady into our family, I instantly see her as one of my children.. I love and accept her through all of her flaws just like I love and accept the children I gave birth to.
Mother in laws have always been an issue, wives need to remember to be respectful, keep respectful distance, keep respectful in your OWN home where MIL isn't allowed and keep it respectfully moving. That's your husbands issue to resolve, nothing you do will be good enough unless the son sets expectations with his mother.
As far I know Sadhguru did not stay with his family after marriage. Moreover, the matter is yes "Mother in law" loves,but only her child, and "thinks as mine" only her child. She never accepts daughter in law as her child. This difference of love and care pains the daughter in law who has left her parents and shifted to a new family and looking for some support and love from her new "mother"
I was a puppet all my childhood to my aunt who I stayed with manipulated me, beaten me for her personal issues or just compared me and belittled me 24/7( Bec my parents were poor and they were in a village where there is no school).. Then till I got married, my mother suddenly who took charge of me after schooling, tried to make me a puppet Bec she thought I am an error human 😂 she could never understand me because I was rebel and I had my voice. I was not like other girls who are very sweet etc.. and I got married to an amazing guy.. I thought all my problems are end.. But but but my MIL is very very controlling just like my mom did .. correcting my dressing choices 24/7 my maid dresses better than me 🤣🤣 I don’t even have a style . I don’t say a word back.. Bec she is very problematic .. I wear comfortable and lose clothes that are very dull.. still she has a problem.. I am just losing interest in my life… why is always someone there to REFORM me.. I am fine and comfortable for who I am.. I am simple person with no lavish expectations or no much desires in life and never bother anyone.. why am I being a punching bag to someone always.. it’s so painful.. my husband says don’t involve me , you stand for yourself in MIL issue.. I wish I am a MALE
Me too. I am always being controlled by my mom now she is controlling my wife. I always support my wife. But as a husband if i get involved too much relationships of my wife and my mom gets more complicated.
Your husband is right . Don't involve him . Solve the issue on your own . Ignore your MIL as much as you can or live separately . She isn't going to change so change yourself . Learn how to tackle her .
Should I tell my mother about my mother in law's problm ....my husband keeps telling me that don't carry his family affairs to my family .....well I'm not understanding, bt something is not feel right to me . Is it toxic? Pls tell me guys
Yes he wants to control u But until u stand for yourself and tell your family his real nature he will not change I went into depression by hiding things
As a woman I will say never hide things from your family . Especially to your mother . Even my own mother advice other girls like your husband . It's a tactic to control . I know my own mother's nature . She is a narcissist .
But now that my boys are turning ten this year. I feel like they will date people and I will have to deal with daughter in laws ❤ so I'm starting to have sympathy for her even though i don't know why she criticizes me. Buys me clothes that are too big to tell me I'm fat. Idk why makes fun of me for being white and American. Makes fun of my cooking. Dresses up all the time to make me look bad. Says I have acne all over my face. I might seem over confident but I'm not. I am tired of being picked apart. She too acts like she's better than everyone else and I don't like people like that. We are all one. ❤
@@AmazonQuickNotes 🤣🤣 she's really confusing for sure lol. I don't even want to be with her son he loves me way more. I'm just done with relationships in general. ❤️❤️❤️ I will try to be a good mother in law. I just want my kids to be happy.
We all blame our mother-in-law. We blame her for raising his son like this and no one even blames father-in-law!! Mother-in-law: who gets suppressed by husband when tries to object his stupidity, who gets treated like a slave/ unpaid labour, surrounded by people who says" be successful" to her but silently brings all the useless work to her!! She is the one who doesn't get help with a single chore or raising a child be it as less as 5 min!!! And yeah!! Let's all blame "women-in-laws"
Lekin meri sans to apni beti ko bhagwan manti h meri nnd itni ameer h Or hm dono yha berozgaar h abhi fr bhi wo apni beti ko yha se itna deti h meri nand bhi lalchi h mujhe nhi pta mujhe bura kyu lgta h wo unki beti h dene do but fr bhi mujhe lgta h ki ye glt h pta nhi kya shi h kya glt mujhe to Meri nnd ameer hone ka ghmnd dikhata h mujhe ki mere pas to itne kpde h ye h wo h Or yha apni maa se le jati h itne sare suit vgra Kya kru m M glt hu kya??
@@suryakantibiswal nhi meri aaisi soch nhi h m apne mayke sekbhi kuch nhi lati unpe q bojh banu m ab unne shadi kr di meri abhi pdh rhi hu jldi hi job mil jayegi m meri bhabi k liye kbhi presani nhi banu
I hope bad mother in laws have less aura lives less and have more pains and loneliness ,i wish i wish !!! I hope the HUSBANDS who r the momma boy will witness the same pain other way or someday from their own kids and realize how it feels same like to be treated like his motherinlaw and him being this motherinlaws support and defending us (victims )!! I hope i wish ( telling because i cant bare the pain i feel sorry for myself sometimes even think about divorce cos of her but i m left in a room with no windows its not abt room i speak its about the suffocation yet the door is there the beauty of relationship is destroyed cos there is no hope just bare)
I have read all comments, I am surprised to read all comments about Mother in law. Not all mother in laws are venomous. If they are nice,generous,not greedy,still they are treated so badly as they are not part of the family.I feel all the own mothers are very warm till she becomes MIL These feelings are there only because, we as DIL want to only reap not nurture the families .
when a man is trying to make sense of a mil, what on earth is he saying loool, it has nothing to do with love if you abuse and harm the wife of you son. Its about control/fear/trauma etc etc
Meri mother in law ne apne bete ki married life kharab ki huyi hai due to her insecurities. Ki ab mera ghar or bete dono uski wife ka ho gya hai. Mai ab kuch bhi ni hu. Meri koi importance or value , attention kuch ni raha. Mai jobless bhi hu, old bhi hoti ja ri hu, mere future ka kya hoga. She is so selfish.
My mother in law calls so much from India she allways calls to complain about other family members…. My husband says way don’t you talk to her or call her . 😅 I don’t need to talk to her she has him to talk to . . When she does call she never asks to speak with me . Once so way should I have to all ways be the person to play nice . She lives in India with her husband . Most of the time she calls my husband and never ask to speak to me if she is calling she can talk to me as well . I sometimes think way get involved in drama if I say something to my husband I will look like the bad guy . I really think his mom has problems of her own her other son left India as well so it’s her and her husband she is alone in the house most of the time so all she does is has a little phone book ready and just calls realatives all day to talk about them behind there backs 😅 I don’t need that kind of energy in my life . The less I communicate with her the more it’s better for my peace of mind . Am I the bad guy here what do you think .? Even when I do talk to her it’s small talk how are you what’s the weather like that kind of stuff I don’t go to deep with her .
It's not applicable to all the mother in laws it's because of some nonsense n forceful relationships which don't workout and simply try to blame mother in law ......
If mil is so insecure of son taking wife side and taunt a dil for everything n destroy other women life ,better not to marry her son !! It is a good option n they can pay someone to take their taunts n do household chores!! People wan’t everything free of cost
Mother in law's be like property main bech di lekin kitchen ka design mere hisaab se hi hoga 😂😂. For those who don't understand once you marry off your son you have no business in his and his wife's life
Ye mother in law bhul jati h ki daughter in law bhi kisi ki beti hai jisko ek uske jaisi mother ne hi paida kiya h or bhut mehnat se paal pos ke bada kiya hai. Ek bahu ka jeevan narak banan me ek auratein ek bar bhi nahi sochti. Khud ye jis phase se guzri hoti hain ye apni bahu ko bhi aise hi suffer krwana chahti hain. Mera bhi ek beta hai or kal ko uski shadi hogi to mai kabhi bhi ye sare din usko nhi dekhne dungi
If Mother in law has two sons then she makes sure one remain in control,for that she starts instructing his son how to torture wife, don't listen her problems, Don't give money Act innocent but keep troubling & act as per what i say To those husbands please never fall into this trap (i know she is your mother but ur brother taking care of his wife,ur father taking care of ur mother but who left alone is -ur wife ) With time u will see the real thing that ur mother does not care for u but want control only and for that she and you ruined relation with wife who really cared for you Once she decides to move on whatever u say nothing gonna work 🙏 And for now u think u have mother father siblings but everyone has their own family and as your age will increase ,no one will stand with u except ur wife but if you ruins thing badly worst then not even her
Mother in laws if they truly love their son they will let him live a good life with his wife. This is true love of a mother. But some mother in laws are so stupid and selfish just don’t get it!
My mother in law is a very Horrible person. She Treats me like a kamvali bai. She wants me to do each and everything. She don't even cook food for me on a days where i am very sick. She Cook's for her son, her husband and for herself only. I eat maggie or some snacks. My husband is not ready to stay seperate with me. My mother in law and my husband says we can't be apart from each other. My sister in laws are married but they both come and stay for 15 days every month.. My mother in law wants her married daughter to stay with her. She wears her married daughters saree, jewellery which is bought by her husband and everything to showoff. I don't understand what type. Of love is this? If mother wants her married girl to stay in mom's place only why do they want her to get marry? On each festival or even normal haldi kunku function, marriage, birthday parties, in any type of functions also my mother in law holds her married daughter finger and take her to every event. She dont event do formality and ask me to come. My husband don't find any thing wrong in this. I fight for these things. I wanted my mother in law to do household things with me equally. But she dont want to do any work. According to her now i am daughter in law and i show serve her every thing and she is my mother law so she has a right to do anything wrong. My husband has beaten me for questioning his mother and fighting with her for my rights.
By the way she's Mexican. Lol. Im white so I don't have a lot in common with her anyways. ❤ I refuse to learn the language too. I'm just beyond stubborn 😔😂😂😂
A mother in law as per my opinion feels scared of dilution of power. A wise lady would keep her on the throne and be her manager who does everything for her. So, the plan is still urs because u suggest it everytime but when u ask her" mummy g lets do it this we" she feels included and respected thats all she wants. Inclusion and respect.
My MIL fought with me on road abused me very badly, said things like '2 kodi ki ladhki' , 'hmashe mere ladhke ke peeche padi rahti h uske &*$* mein gussi rahti h'. And i have to still live with her, and everyone wants me to be happy with it.
When I was born God gave me wisdom and I used it Judicially. Occasionally he appreciates that. 1) Avoid Marriage thus Avoid women. 2) No In Law. No Wife to control me. 😂😂😂
Mother in-law are always venom snakes who spoils their own son's married life by intruding their personal stuff!
Really
I wish ur son realises this soon....
True 😮
Exactly said! 👍
Totally agree most of them are same.
I appreciate mother in law who treats daughter in law as a, family.
Really bow, down to such humans!
True doing the same with me
A woman who destroys another woman is called a mother in law. 😭
Yes true
And men. My wife's mother is a mole.
Very true toxic inlaws r everywhere
Exactly true in most of the cases.
Additional bonus sister in law like my case!
Very true
For those who have problem with in laws, solution is to talk less, involve less and do the reasonable duties towards in laws. This is my opinion.
Still they will not let you live.
Exactly
Still somtime it irritate u most ..even doing all
What about things we get to hear constantly..how to stop hearing.Even if we don't react and do our duties silently still they find some or the other things to point out. It affects our mental health. After hearing so much, You start questioning your abilities. There was a time when I started thinking I am not good enough.
Totally agree.
But that silence also they can't take it from us. They go mad till we, react.
Oscar winning roles by these people.
Most of the cases not all!
My mother is law is super clever , great actress , and tries always to help , she is a monitor of the house , she knows here you put your dirty underwear , controlling means - knowing all , observing all..... and making little comments in order to help.... and makes herself a victim ...coz she does all with love......
True yaar
@If you are sad,talk to me kya... Thum ache se apni padaayi pe dhyan do.. aur ek acha job doondo...
OMG ! are you talking about your MIL or my MIL?
Same! I feel it would be better if she just directly fights to me instead of drama. I'm a straight forward person i can't just deal with this type of people
Yes. She loves and the least are her so called blessings.
My mother in law is a real witch
😂😂
my mother in law is not that bad but my mother is.
Same
I can relate fully
Mine too 😂😂😂😂😂
So many times I feel , in today’s world,when most of the women are given the privilege of their choice and identity.A woman only treats other woman so badly and disrespectful way that I feel what is the essence of celebrating the Woman’s Day. ? ? ?
My mother in law decides the way i should dress. I wear pretty decent dress i don't like wearing lot of jewels. Whenever i get ready for a function, she'll come and say don't you have anything better to wear? Can't you wear more jewels? Idk it's irritating. My husband doesn't say anything about my dress.
Then i understood, she just wants me to have a low self esteem. Even if i cook tasty she'll say it's but u should have done that or this. Giving opinion in everything . She wants me to be her little puppet😊
Same happens with me
You don't be puppet you be yourself you better argue
That's my story too. Usually what I do is, I say this is what I like or want. We should keep our boundaries strong no matter how many times they tell the same thing trying to manipulate us but in an assertive way.
These mother in laws are totally insecure. Most of these MIL 's don't like responsible DIL's. They pin point bad from good.
I got married 2 months back but these things happen to me everyday. Even my husband supports her saying she is just teaching you you should adjust.
My mother in law is a mental patient.. emotional blackmailer.. such a selfish woman who doesn't love her son at all bcz she afraid her daughter in law takes away her son from him
My situation is very bad. Bcoz of my husband my mother in law fights with me too much. I am alone.My husband never supports me.....
Same she is a depression patient
Same situation is with me......
@@rabiahere1901 Yes
@rabiahere1901 Due to toxic husband and toxic in laws.........i am suffering from thyroid......
My hindu mother in law came to uk in 1963, and brought all her ideals with her. When my husband got married to me in 1994, she soon started to behave like those bossy, rude, entitled Bollywood types tyrants. I packed my bags and went back to my flat. Her son followed me. The rest is history. This is the modern world. People have human rights. Slavery was abolished.
The old fashion way of treating daughters in laws is CRUEL and is nothing more than slavery.
I got married in 2019, my mother in law has still not changed in 4.5 years...she still wants to rule the kitchen and her son. She still plans trips without me with her son. Whenever I have a fight with my husband, she would take him out on a trip
He is her new husband @@shiprasarkar6123
@@shiprasarkar6123Congrats you married a man with no actual independence and leadership skills.
@@shiprasarkar6123 ur MIL is his 1 st wife u are 2nd
How can mother in law become my true mother ? Its non sense
Same as a daughter in law cant become a daughter..vise vera
its a trap of those who say m.i.l is the mother. total lie. I know none of the guys will ever understand it.
The most critical person in the world is mother in law. Don't know when I will get rid of her.plz god help me.
I use to do that.. pray when will my mil be gone. But it never made any difference until I started praying for my happiness. Why pray for something negative for others. Why not pray for something positive for ourselves.
She ruined my life
Get divorce..
Do you think middle class in laws torture their daughters in law? Do middle class men cheat? There is a perception that middle class people are nicer because they have values, is it true?
I think if i go through all the comments i will definitely find one from my wife too.
As a mother of 1 son, I understood the feeling of a mother. I think, it all depends with mind set and the environment. These mother became also a wife and they also suffered from abusive MIL, and now they're doing it as a revenge of their past experience. I thinks This has to be stopped by educating and counseling. Not because they're mother, and they have all the rights, or Better keep their son, no need to marry. And also to DIL, don't give up easily, coz once you become a mother you will understand, but it doesn't mean you will do the same as your MIL treats you, instead help your son and his wife to grow, because their success will be your success. If they failed, it's also your failure. This has to be done by a positive and smart mind set. Amazing and joyful environment gives long life while Unhealthy behaviour and habits shorten life. God bless.
How do you know? Sometimes they learn it from their own mothers, how they were raised I seen my exes grandma and his mother.
Man both of them are the same, I’m so annoyed
If a mother in law stops behaving like the owner of a daughter in law, half the mess is gone. I dont know how they start feeling like they adopted an orphan helpless girl and they have full control over her. Its the fault of the parents who 'give away' their daughter on the pretext of some traidition. Everybody treats the a woman like a property. If this stops, all the mess will stop.
So true 👍🏻
Good advice 👍
Mam if mother in laws think like you. Than the earth will be a heaven place for every daughter in law.
But unfortunately situation is completely different.
Mother in laws made puppy to his son and after marriage they completely ruined daughter in law life.
If you think your relationship is strong - bring YOUR MOTHER IN LAW TOO SEE HOW STRONG YOU ARE .....
They put their whole efforts to keep their son against DIL so that there will be no strong bonding between the two and their relationship will jump out the window
Is mil thinks like this she wouldn't have married her son I think you have imaginary problems@@amandeepkoursaini9832
Yes exactly and mine turned disgusting after she started living with us. My husband and I, we have love marriage but now I don't even want my husband to touch me. I hate him so much. Everything his mother says and does, he always says to ignore her comments and behaviour because she doesn't know what she's saying according to him. He keep insisting me to talk to her over the phone. She made my pregnancy days hell and due to that behaviour she lost the respect which she used to get. I hate my husband and his family. I don't even want to talk to my husband on any topic apart from our baby's health.
No maintain a long distance from mother in law.
Than couple can live happy married life.
India should follow separate family only 3people husband wife and kids
So true!!!
I know the fact . Just clear one theory in mind that if you go against nature , you gonna face obstracles . every spacies in the world separate from father and mother after maturity and this is the nature . We Indians know the practical things lately .
I am in an abusive marriage where my mother in law wants me to be her replica, I don't idealise her based on the choices she made in her life. All her children are suffering from bad marriages after her advice. My husband listens to her all the time and our discussions does not remain all between us. I wanted a companion but I am getting an ignorant man who is just concerned about his mother and siblings.
I did everything to make him happy - cooking, cleaning, giving him massages, serving him with utmost care but I got nothing but disrespect. I still feel honestly that if he stops following the guidance of his mother we can live happily.
Venting out from my system because there is nobody with whom I can share.
Can we talk ?
You are completely right because my brother is living in your husband’s scenario right now. And I had to cut out the “guidance” from my mother because it was fruitless and only continued to hurt people, and her advice undoubtedly fails every time. Im not sure how his mother is, but mine acts selfishly because of a lack of foundation, she’s in survival mode, spirituality goes right over her head. And this is why I give her grace, yet again and again, I do not want to concern myself with even my own mother because I see the consequences of her actions.
I listened to my mother about only a few things before I was married to my wife, but even that harmed my relationship with my wife. A man should not have to report to his original family about the new family he started when he departed from them. They are in no intellectual position to propose anything to you. He must come to realize that his mother is not doing the right thing and he must adjust. I, having that similar mother, am in a difficult position. But most the time, I do not want anything to do with her energy because it brings us all down, even if she is my mother. My mother should want me to grow and thrive and be happy, and if she interferes with such, she doesn’t want my best! So therefore it is best to distance yourself, I don’t want to burn the bridge, but with so much continual drama, I think of it.
I apologize if this is too much! But my wife was in the same position you are, trying to everything she could to support me and help me and I would disrespect her because I felt that there was too much pressure on my life. I should have realized, at the time, that a boy listens to his mother but a man listens to his spirit, this is my opinion. We as men must graduate from this to be liberated from it mentally, but the mother in law will still be there doing the same old thing. It is then you decide what you’d like to do. My wife had many difficult conversations with me and she’d be mad at me and rightfully so! Drama is not needed and it’s not beneficial. It is not auspicious to hang around in a snake pit unless you know how to convert venom into nectar. But sometimes I don’t feel like doing such intense practice! You are not locked in, you both have a choice. Again sorry for so much text but this spoke to me because I’ve lived it and am still living through it. The holidays were good with her, which is a step in the right direction. But we could tell it was hard for her in the beginning, but she was trying to absolve the wound and trying is all you can hope for in someone sometimes. Much love
The only way to deal with narcissistic people is to behave narcissistically with them. That's the only boundary they understand but don't do that fully. Be a very sweet narcissist.
True...they always want to stick with their son and ruin the privacy of they son and dil
The fact that everyone talks about this shows its a serious problem and it aides in divorce rate issues and unhappy couples
Most irrirating ,jeolous,sweet poison, person in this universe is mother in law.
100%
The most hated creature on this planet- MIL😜
Yes...
For me disguisting creature...
😂yeasss
Totally agree in most of the cases!
With personal experience totally agree!
Distance is key as a husband from mother outlaw
In laws should allow the young couple to stay separatly after marriage .Let them lead their life and be happy. In laws blessings is required not their control. Daughter in law is a daughter. Give your love and support to their families and maintain the healthy relationship till the end for the well being of all.
Please help!! My mom is destroying my relationship with wife. She is too much dominating. I cant leave her as she is old and how can she take care of herself. It will be rude. I hope god gives strength to my wife to take all this shit.
Hey can we talk about this matter
You can't do anything, just watch your life destroying, You might thing it will be over in a year or two but till then your wife will be changed. Either give birth to a female child or if you want boy, bring 2. Because being a single son is not easy
@@Abhishek.ranjanbro I am a single son😭😭😭
@@itsakingfisher4354so what's d problem..if you marry then try to treat her wife like a family member not as slave
@@Abhishek.ranjan don't tolerate your mother's shit . Take care of her but ignore her tantrums . Tell her if she doesn't stay in boundary then you will be forced to leave the home .
Sometimes it is so hard to understand what Sadhguru wants to convey..
Bcoz He doesn't know the answer to every question.
When I married my wife I wasn’t joining her family I was starting my own . End of !
Even I have mother but she will never support to the wrong things
My husband is not loyal to me and his mother is supporting to him
Is this role of a mother ?
My mother in law is very very very kanjus and don’t know what is her agenda for our marriage life
From the beginning she just want us to be separated
Yuk family i got
Me 2. My mil tried to prove that I am mental patient
Sometimes I wish to disappear from this world... I don't have an energy to stop the way she's treating me... My best advice please marry someone who doesn't have mom and dad/ better stay single....i promised my mom to marry him. But i feel regret now. Sometimes I feel working under the law of a slave. There is no love and care 🥺I miss my Singlehood life.... 😭😭😭i never treated anyone badly in my life.. But why my life is 🙂🙂🙂am I sinful soul
Same here😭. Always she taunts me about my things which i have brought from my father's house.. But when anyone is there then she treats me like i am her daughter to show other people that she is so humble and nicest mother in law😢. But always she demands money from us and she doesn't even want a single paisa invest on me by her son. 😭😭😭😭. There are many things which i can't explain.why a mother have 2 character. Why i dont understand. All say mother is greatest than anything then why she (mother) have 2face😞😭
I am about to marry a man with toxic in-laws who wants to live in our home. I don't speak their language, they don't speak mine nor English. I am so sad of knowing I need to let him go, if he doesn't put me first. But he won't. He will give all his resources to them, allow me to be in a house where I can't understand what they are talking about. Expecting me to carry on with all home duties and work and learn their language. I feel exhausted of just thinking about that. If you read this comment, give your opinion. I am really in love with this individual, but I can't stand the future. I just want to have our own family, not interference. Is it that healthy. I live in Ireland and my future in- laws don't work. I would love to have two children and work part time to be with them and help them grow. Is it selfish?
Same here I miss my single life mine was love marriage..I didn't think about consequences before the marriage..my husband is not lovable as before he loves his mom more than anything and I come secondary for him..he loves me but somewhere in his mind.. I'm fed with my new life and I hate staying at my husband Home..it feels like I'm in a concentration camp..i can't adjust with my mother in law she's rude and judgemental and sometimes I feel like a slave working there..and when I complain my husband gets angry on me and shout at me and I try to make him calm because I stay there's house...it feels like killing myself...I just want to die and started to hate my new married Life...worst ever.. after marriage girl going husband's house system must be banned first....I miss my home ..but no longer I will keep this silence..
Dear my heart goes out to all of you. I know the feeling being treated like a slave. 😔
Never do the mistake of hurting ur self. I know what u are feeling and going through. I lived with my mil who was double faced. She use to bitch at the back of me and in front acting as if she never say anything bad about me. I use to tell my husband abt her and he always turns around and tell me “just keep quiet she is old and dont know what she is saying”. I had 1 child and was also working. Morning had to wake up early make breakfast for mil, shower the little baby feed and put to sleep before going to work. After coming back make dinner, clean and get baby ready for bed and feed baby. After baby sleep ill go and clean the kitchen. It was a hell for me, when my husband use to come back after work, eat and sleep. I had never talked back to my mil. If she use to fight with me i use to just go in the room and sit there. My room was the only place I could find peace. When my little girl was 4yo my husband had a stroke. He couldn’t walk or eat himself. He only depended on me while his mother sits in front of him feeling discussed seeing his food coming out of his mouth covering his tshirt. Being a mother she could say that for her son.. after a few months my mil was diagnosed with breast cancer and she had to go for therapy. Now not 1 but there were 2 people that i had to take care of not including my little girl that was not getting the love and care that im suppose to give her. Then came covid and lockdown. That when I started going down until i felt like killing my self. But I couldn’t let my loved once my mother and sisters and my little girl to suffer for something that is not my fault. That when i told my self let see. Every time i go to temple the priest will say god always help those who believe in him. Lets see if god really come to help me. I prayed every day before even i go out of the room ill pray and ill ask for my and my little girl’s happiness and freedom to live how we want and no one to tell us what we are supposed to do. When i use to pray ill always imagine me and my daughter happy living in the house and just the 2 of us. I use to even get angry with god especially on those days when i am frustrated. But i still continue doing my prayers. I took it as a test of loyalty towards god. This went on for 4yrs. Husbands condition got worse and my mil cancer spread to her heart. She had blood and pus coming out from her cancer tumour which i had to do dressing for her. My mil got weaker and her sister came to stay with us to be there with my mil. When i will take mil to toilet in the morning mil sister use to quickly go out of the room because she dont want to help me to open mil dyper. After mil shower ill go and clean husband and give him breakfast. While mil and her sister sitting on the dining table eating breakfast and gossiping about me. Shit, blood, pus and urine all i clean and still she will talk bad about me. Best part while all this happening i got to know my husband was having affair with his cousin sister and this was going on since before i got married. What was I suppose to do in this situation. I was very frustrated felt like leaving the house but then thinking of my mother, what not people are going to tell her. What people are going to see is i left a disabled husband to suffer because i dont want to take care of him. No 1 is going to think from my point of view. Months passed by mil became weaker and had to take her to hospital. After 2 days she was supported to come back home and on that day morning she passed away. Many people would have thought i am happy that she is gone but the truth was i felt very bad for her. Her final days where she could do prayers and ask for forgiveness she spent gossiping. After mil passed away husband also passed away. I wouldn’t say i was happy but it felt a bit relieved that i dont need to go through the hell that i did for the past few years and now im able to give the love that my daughter deserves. I can give my 100% concentration to her. I could decorate the house how i want to which I couldn’t do before. The only thing that gave me the courage to wake up every day and go through it again and again was PRAYERS, BELIEVE IN GOD THAT HAPPINESS WILL COME and a friend whom i never meet before. I started chatting with a friend online. I use to tell her everything that i feel.. all my frustration and anger i use to tell her. She use to tell me not to keep anything in my heart if i feel angry then just let all the anger out to her. It was a relief for me to talk to someone that dont know me who will not judge me and will just listen to me when i needed her.
Again ill advice you never ever again think of taking your life. If you are not the bad person then why should you suffer or why should your loved once suffer. Will anything change if you kill your self. Take this as your past karma that you have to go through and the only way to ease it is by praying.
If you need someone to talk to or let your frustration out message me, talk to me.. i have gone through it.. i know what you feel.. imagine you going through a dark tunnel, you will reach to the other end only if you dont stop walking. Ill pray for you, for god to give you the strength and for your happiness.. 🙏🏼 ♥️
I have came to my mil living for 1 and 1/2 day not even two days she makes my life hell in 36 hours I can't even sit on chair can turn on the fan can't even looked at the window she is driving me crazy
I didn't even eat for 36 hours keep crying and thinking it's all my fault I don't know I don't feel like living
Sadhguru spoke a lot here without saying anything really. I guess people will hear what they want to hear and be satisfied if you say it in a tone that signals what you are saying is profound and mysterious.
I am American and I just avoid my mother in law. Ok I honestly think she's jealous too of my looks and I'm full of life and funny. She's boring and not very pretty. ❤ But I just be nice and ignore her. You can't let others get a reaction out of you. I really have just cut her off. My hubby goes over there with kids but I refuse because I'm tired of putting effort into relationships. I always put my all into relationships and nothing back. It's a common theme of my life. I've since then cut most of my own family off too. They are toxic jealous of me and on drugs. I just can't with any of them me and my boys are so 😊 happy. We don't have to deal with family lol from either side. I work weekends and my hubby goes over there but I am at work. He works during the week but I about to work a second job during week too while kids are at school. ❤❤❤ I love avoiding people I am the definition of anti social.
I feel you. I can’t wait yo work to have excuses not to be with anyone on weekends
@@Liii-44 good. She's not either. She's same way. Facade.
@@Liii-44 i don't care about looks I've gained weight and now lost 27 lbs my mother in law cares too much. She's getting older too so I'm sure it sucks. I'll be old soon too. But I am not comparing myself to others like her. I just be happy with what I have.
@@JOVI08 🤣🤣🤣 plus my job is security and I work solo lol 🤣🤣🤣
@@kristinayoung6535you're comparing yourself by not being like her you don't know actually how to live life
I resisted and I won. It took years of locking horns, but she couldn’t grasp me ( slippery fish) and eventually gave up.
Am trying the same. In the very initial stage of my marriage and I tried my level best to be all nice and sweet, but then I realized she's taking my sweetness to be a ticket pass to invade into our bedroom and interfere in our conversations. This infuriated me, and I voiced it out as a concern. Now all I can hear is my husband and her having a bad fight. I feel guilty starting it but I would ever horrible if she continued this behavior.
I have no idea why am typing this down here but I really want this out of my system.
Mein is helicopter mil she doesn't want to see us Together, happy and sound.
🤣
My mother in Law is Kali nagin and sweet poison.
Mine though no sweetness only venom
Few decades later u will get the same words of appreciation by someone...
@@meghana736 same
@@AntiJihadi bold of you to assume she has a son
@@Abaddon-u1i Not at all my friend.....Karma is not just a bitch, its a bitch with ability to compound cause into effect......
Mother is mother. No law can make another mother
I met my ex ,who was divorced because of his mother already, ended up splitting with me too because of his mother. She has groomed him to be a mummys boy since he was small ..she is twice divorced herself and controls my ex who turns 50 next year! He will never change and neither will she. They have an enmeshed relationship and ge takes care of her. Even when she travels, he will still do her bidding.
This material acts as a catalyst for personal growth and expanded perspectives. A book with like-minded subjects transformed my outlook. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
They attack their sons love for his wife. They are working from a place of control and jealousy. Toxic and abusive is what most of them are. Not all but most!
God give me the strength, empathy, patience and kindness to be able to be the best MIL for my DIL.🙏 I definately don't want to be like my MIL.
Mother-in-law who tourchers her daughter in law in all the way and make her insecure feel and give her pain and tears the same thing in happen to her own daughter karma is working instantly....
Yes it does. I witnessed it.
I was searching many books and online content for this... Unfortunately there is no books or classses for this... Many family are suffering due to this
Try Toxic Mother in law by Dr Susan Forward
@@HarshitGupta-th4qu thank you
My mother in law is witch as a mother in law but she was daughter in law once she used to be a witch daughter in law even though her mother in law was good
I just can't stand my mother in law. She's so annoying!!!!! Let alone everytime she opens her mouth
my mother in law is sick
Not all MILs are evil, but unfortunately most are :)
99% are evil .. I’m having issues now.. I only stayed 5 weeks with her
I hope one day you will be blessed enough to be a mother in law. 😂
@@ranjitdhinsa8603 I hope one day you will be blessed enough to be a mother in law and join the 99% 😂
@@tamertesera8648 I have bigger and better goals in life than be a mother in law.. you sound really sad .. you should find some goals in life
@@ranjitdhinsa8603 lol, there is nothing more important than being a mother in law. That is what nature is created you for( transmit your genetic information and contribute to the survival of human being) by mating with a man that your mother in law created , Not to be a doctor, a lawyer or a rich woman or anything else ( that is created by man to assist in the survival and better genetic selection). 😂😂
My mother in law has rhuined our marriage.
I’m so sorry, mine is ruining mine as well sMh
Same.
Mine too
Mine too
Mine too.she is toxic
This confuses me. Just how moms don’t have favorite children and love them all equally. When one of my sons friends, a young lady into our family, I instantly see her as one of my children.. I love and accept her through all of her flaws just like I love and accept the children I gave birth to.
Why in law's family don't want that there is a healthy relationship between husband and wife
Mother-in-law always wants a attention from his Son 😢.....and you want 24/7 a free servant😔😞
Seeemaaaa
It’s rightly said being a girl is a sin
I wish we come across a time where no girl should exist
No girl should agree for marriage.
Mother in laws have always been an issue, wives need to remember to be respectful, keep respectful distance, keep respectful in your OWN home where MIL isn't allowed and keep it respectfully moving. That's your husbands issue to resolve, nothing you do will be good enough unless the son sets expectations with his mother.
Why only mil ? Fil nothing less
As far I know Sadhguru did not stay with his family after marriage.
Moreover, the matter is yes "Mother in law" loves,but only her child, and "thinks as mine" only her child. She never accepts daughter in law as her child.
This difference of love and care pains the daughter in law who has left her parents and shifted to a new family and looking for some support and love from her new "mother"
I was a puppet all my childhood to my aunt who I stayed with manipulated me, beaten me for her personal issues or just compared me and belittled me 24/7( Bec my parents were poor and they were in a village where there is no school)..
Then till I got married, my mother suddenly who took charge of me after schooling, tried to make me a puppet Bec she thought I am an error human 😂 she could never understand me because I was rebel and I had my voice. I was not like other girls who are very sweet etc.. and I got married to an amazing guy.. I thought all my problems are end..
But but but my MIL is very very controlling just like my mom did .. correcting my dressing choices 24/7 my maid dresses better than me 🤣🤣 I don’t even have a style . I don’t say a word back.. Bec she is very problematic .. I wear comfortable and lose clothes that are very dull.. still she has a problem.. I am just losing interest in my life… why is always someone there to REFORM me.. I am fine and comfortable for who I am.. I am simple person with no lavish expectations or no much desires in life and never bother anyone.. why am I being a punching bag to someone always.. it’s so painful.. my husband says don’t involve me , you stand for yourself in MIL issue.. I wish I am a MALE
Same issues I'm facing
Me too. I am always being controlled by my mom now she is controlling my wife. I always support my wife. But as a husband if i get involved too much relationships of my wife and my mom gets more complicated.
Your husband is right . Don't involve him . Solve the issue on your own . Ignore your MIL as much as you can or live separately . She isn't going to change so change yourself . Learn how to tackle her .
Should I tell my mother about my mother in law's problm ....my husband keeps telling me that don't carry his family affairs to my family .....well I'm not understanding, bt something is not feel right to me . Is it toxic? Pls tell me guys
Yes he wants to control u
But until u stand for yourself and tell your family his real nature he will not change
I went into depression by hiding things
As a woman I will say never hide things from your family . Especially to your mother . Even my own mother advice other girls like your husband . It's a tactic to control . I know my own mother's nature . She is a narcissist .
But now that my boys are turning ten this year. I feel like they will date people and I will have to deal with daughter in laws ❤ so I'm starting to have sympathy for her even though i don't know why she criticizes me. Buys me clothes that are too big to tell me I'm fat. Idk why makes fun of me for being white and American. Makes fun of my cooking. Dresses up all the time to make me look bad. Says I have acne all over my face. I might seem over confident but I'm not. I am tired of being picked apart. She too acts like she's better than everyone else and I don't like people like that. We are all one. ❤
sounds like yours is from hell
@@AmazonQuickNotes 🤣🤣 she's really confusing for sure lol. I don't even want to be with her son he loves me way more. I'm just done with relationships in general. ❤️❤️❤️ I will try to be a good mother in law. I just want my kids to be happy.
We all blame our mother-in-law. We blame her for raising his son like this and no one even blames father-in-law!! Mother-in-law: who gets suppressed by husband when tries to object his stupidity, who gets treated like a slave/ unpaid labour, surrounded by people who says" be successful" to her but silently brings all the useless work to her!! She is the one who doesn't get help with a single chore or raising a child be it as less as 5 min!!! And yeah!! Let's all blame "women-in-laws"
Is it the only power they have in life ??
People but my MIL entirely different she used to hide all provisions, food, she will not allowed me to cook a glass of milk also.
Someone said if the evil enter in your house,he through you out of the house.
Lekin meri sans to apni beti ko bhagwan manti h meri nnd itni ameer h Or hm dono yha berozgaar h abhi fr bhi wo apni beti ko yha se itna deti h meri nand bhi lalchi h mujhe nhi pta mujhe bura kyu lgta h wo unki beti h dene do but fr bhi mujhe lgta h ki ye glt h pta nhi kya shi h kya glt mujhe to
Meri nnd ameer hone ka ghmnd dikhata h mujhe ki mere pas to itne kpde h ye h wo h Or yha apni maa se le jati h itne sare suit vgra
Kya kru m
M glt hu kya??
Nanad ke jagah khudko rakho . Kya tumhe bura lagta ?
@@suryakantibiswal nhi meri aaisi soch nhi h m apne mayke sekbhi kuch nhi lati unpe q bojh banu m ab unne shadi kr di meri abhi pdh rhi hu jldi hi job mil jayegi m meri bhabi k liye kbhi presani nhi banu
But there do exist many women who have the ability to win over daughters in law as daughters. They are never praised for what they do.
If there are such MILs then they are considered as 😇 Angels😇
Rare breed of women.
I hope bad mother in laws have less aura lives less and have more pains and loneliness ,i wish i wish !!! I hope the HUSBANDS who r the momma boy will witness the same pain other way or someday from their own kids and realize how it feels same like to be treated like his motherinlaw and him being this motherinlaws support and defending us (victims )!! I hope i wish ( telling because i cant bare the pain i feel sorry for myself sometimes even think about divorce cos of her but i m left in a room with no windows its not abt room i speak its about the suffocation yet the door is there the beauty of relationship is destroyed cos there is no hope just bare)
I have read all comments, I am surprised to read all comments about Mother in law. Not all mother in laws are venomous. If they are nice,generous,not greedy,still they are treated so badly as they are not part of the family.I feel all the own mothers are very warm till she becomes MIL
These feelings are there only because, we as DIL want to only reap not nurture the families .
when a man is trying to make sense of a mil, what on earth is he saying loool, it has nothing to do with love if you abuse and harm the wife of you son. Its about control/fear/trauma etc etc
Simple and wise law of mil -- I haven't said in the way u think 😂🙏
I am a son my mother is been very strict but I have headache by her curse of words what shall I do
Can’t stand mine 😒 God 🤦🏾♀️
Sorry to say that Sadhguru who is considered so wise is generalizing and giving wrong example by quoting mother in law as the problem..really sad..
Their son is a problem for not putting his WIFE first over any other woman including his own mother.
Are you sure he has to put wife as first than mother ? Why is it so?
You didn't gave any solution?
Meri mother in law ne apne bete ki married life kharab ki huyi hai due to her insecurities. Ki ab mera ghar or bete dono uski wife ka ho gya hai. Mai ab kuch bhi ni hu. Meri koi importance or value , attention kuch ni raha. Mai jobless bhi hu, old bhi hoti ja ri hu, mere future ka kya hoga. She is so selfish.
My mother in law calls so much from India she allways calls to complain about other family members…. My husband says way don’t you talk to her or call her . 😅 I don’t need to talk to her she has him to talk to . . When she does call she never asks to speak with me . Once so way should I have to all ways be the person to play nice . She lives in India with her husband . Most of the time she calls my husband and never ask to speak to me if she is calling she can talk to me as well . I sometimes think way get involved in drama if I say something to my husband I will look like the bad guy . I really think his mom has problems of her own her other son left India as well so it’s her and her husband she is alone in the house most of the time so all she does is has a little phone book ready and just calls realatives all day to talk about them behind there backs 😅 I don’t need that kind of energy in my life . The less I communicate with her the more it’s better for my peace of mind . Am I the bad guy here what do you think .? Even when I do talk to her it’s small talk how are you what’s the weather like that kind of stuff I don’t go to deep with her .
My Indian mother in-law made me wear her old wedding dress in my wedding function 😢
My mother in law is very toxic even her own daughter she also can't handle her mother s tourcher
Sir I want to ask u if a girl is married and her husband's vibes not matches with her mother
It's not applicable to all the mother in laws it's because of some nonsense n forceful relationships which don't workout and simply try to blame mother in law ......
If you are so worried about MIL then why not marry a Orphan?
I will
That's good idea
If mil is so insecure of son taking wife side and taunt a dil for everything n destroy other women life ,better not to marry her son !! It is a good option n they can pay someone to take their taunts n do household chores!!
People wan’t everything free of cost
Well, just marry someone who's not a mommas boy and who is ok with living far from all the in laws !
The mother should marry her own son. Problem solved . A little gross but it works!
A women who feels jealous always with daughter in law is called mother in law
Mother in law's be like property main bech di lekin kitchen ka design mere hisaab se hi hoga 😂😂.
For those who don't understand once you marry off your son you have no business in his and his wife's life
I call mine "old chimpanzee" 😜
Mine looks like a chimpanzee
My mil stole money from me but yet she prays
The problm is we say women empowerment but women cause more problems in another women's life
Ye mother in law bhul jati h ki daughter in law bhi kisi ki beti hai jisko ek uske jaisi mother ne hi paida kiya h or bhut mehnat se paal pos ke bada kiya hai. Ek bahu ka jeevan narak banan me ek auratein ek bar bhi nahi sochti. Khud ye jis phase se guzri hoti hain ye apni bahu ko bhi aise hi suffer krwana chahti hain. Mera bhi ek beta hai or kal ko uski shadi hogi to mai kabhi bhi ye sare din usko nhi dekhne dungi
If Mother in law has two sons then she makes sure one remain in control,for that she starts instructing his son how to torture wife, don't listen her problems, Don't give money
Act innocent but keep troubling & act as per what i say
To those husbands please never fall into this trap (i know she is your mother but ur brother taking care of his wife,ur father taking care of ur mother but who left alone is -ur wife )
With time u will see the real thing that ur mother does not care for u but want control only and for that she and you ruined relation with wife who really cared for you
Once she decides to move on whatever u say nothing gonna work 🙏
And for now u think u have mother father siblings but everyone has their own family and as your age will increase ,no one will stand with u except ur wife but if you ruins thing badly worst then not even her
Mother in law
Not
Mother in home
Mother in laws if they truly love their son they will let him live a good life with his wife. This is true love of a mother. But some mother in laws are so stupid and selfish just don’t get it!
My mother in law is a very Horrible person. She Treats me like a kamvali bai. She wants me to do each and everything. She don't even cook food for me on a days where i am very sick. She Cook's for her son, her husband and for herself only. I eat maggie or some snacks. My husband is not ready to stay seperate with me. My mother in law and my husband says we can't be apart from each other. My sister in laws are married but they both come and stay for 15 days every month.. My mother in law wants her married daughter to stay with her. She wears her married daughters saree, jewellery which is bought by her husband and everything to showoff. I don't understand what type. Of love is this? If mother wants her married girl to stay in mom's place only why do they want her to get marry?
On each festival or even normal haldi kunku function, marriage, birthday parties, in any type of functions also my mother in law holds her married daughter finger and take her to every event. She dont event do formality and ask me to come. My husband don't find any thing wrong in this. I fight for these things. I wanted my mother in law to do household things with me equally. But she dont want to do any work. According to her now i am daughter in law and i show serve her every thing and she is my mother law so she has a right to do anything wrong.
My husband has beaten me for questioning his mother and fighting with her for my rights.
By the way she's Mexican. Lol. Im white so I don't have a lot in common with her anyways. ❤ I refuse to learn the language too. I'm just beyond stubborn 😔😂😂😂
Mother in law can never give love to her daughter in law. So sadguru's preaching arr useless. Why is he giving gyaan about love
A mother in law as per my opinion feels scared of dilution of power. A wise lady would keep her on the throne and be her manager who does everything for her. So, the plan is still urs because u suggest it everytime but when u ask her" mummy g lets do it this we" she feels included and respected thats all she wants. Inclusion and respect.
My MIL fought with me on road abused me very badly, said things like '2 kodi ki ladhki' , 'hmashe mere ladhke ke peeche padi rahti h uske &*$* mein gussi rahti h'. And i have to still live with her, and everyone wants me to be happy with it.
I am so sorry Pallavi . You need to give her a present - pack some odonil for her, because she stinks like gutter. Nobody should disrespect you.
@@Salman.785 sadly .. everyone wants me to forget and that's what i did
Stand up for yourself and ask your husband to man up and take whichever side is correct.
EXIT
No for my husband , she is goddess now also
My mother in law destroy my life ... 💔
My mother always creates problems and misunderstood my wife and accused her of everything
All these women complaining about mother in laws will do the same in couple of decades 🤣
Mother in law and daughter in law .... we shoulf remove " in law" and call its mother in love and daughter in love 😂
I don’t understand what is he saying
🙏
When I was born God gave me wisdom and I used it Judicially. Occasionally he appreciates that.
1) Avoid Marriage thus Avoid women.
2) No In Law. No Wife to control me. 😂😂😂
Nice😁...enjoying single life😂😌
My mother in law is very narcissistic. She is very bad.
Basically sadhguru also could not answer this question 😅
Great, but daughter in laws are not supposed to have to deal with their bullshit lol.