GriefTalk: The "What If's" and "Should Have Been's"

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  • Опубліковано 10 лют 2025
  • The second video of a small series talking about my own personal walk with grief for the past 12 years after losing my mom and now almost 4 years as a widow. Just sharing what I have learned along the way in hopes it can help someone else walking a similar path.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 243

  • @onlybev1
    @onlybev1 Місяць тому +62

    This is one of the most hearfelt videos I have ever seen. You would not believe how I cried when Matt died. He was "our Matty". He was someone who loved you with no reserve. We all knew it. Your journey has been our journey. Your recovery has been our recovery. You make me proud. You make me rejoice. I only want the best for you. And I wish you so much peace and joy with your new husband and your beautiful children. I love you from afar and know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Love Bev from Oklahoma

    • @jbigmamma3192
      @jbigmamma3192 Місяць тому +6

      Amen

    • @trapped7534
      @trapped7534 Місяць тому +6

      Amen and Amen

    •  Місяць тому +3

      My sister's birthday also on the 24th. 😓 Always Loved Never Forgotten. 💞

    • @lindybloom5
      @lindybloom5 Місяць тому +2

      Amen Sister no one could have said this better. We all loved and miss Matt .
      sending love and prayers to all our sisters And Matt’s beautiful family especially his most precious children ❌⭕️🙏🏻🙏🏻

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +6

      Matty loved you ladies so much!!!! He used to call you all that too...."the lovely ladies" with his crooked smirky smile and deep low voice! hahaha He used to have so much fun reading your comments..... burning his lips off for those hot chew taste tests! hahaha There is an emptiness in my kitchen without him..... I think thats why Mason likes to step in once in awhile....for his Daddy....we all feel it. I used to wonder HOW do I get that feeling to go away....and now, I embrace it. That emptiness is a spot for him that remains....as it should..... I love you Bev! Thanks for sticking with me though all of this. God bless you!

  • @Elizabeth45840
    @Elizabeth45840 Місяць тому +43

    I could really use some prayers. I lost my dad two days ago. It was very unexpected.

    • @trapped7534
      @trapped7534 Місяць тому +6

      Praying for you and your family.

    • @BlueberryGirl723
      @BlueberryGirl723 Місяць тому +4

      You and your loved ones are in my prayers, Elizabeth. Always keep in mind that love never ends. It is an eternal gift we give each other and participate in together. The love you shared in with your father is still alive and growing. It will always be flowing between you both. Your father is in the other side now, he has made that journey before you, and he is preparing something beautiful for you for the day farther in the future that you step through the veil to become a part of the Heavenly.🌹💐❤️
      God bless and give you comfort. My deepest sympathies, Blue~

    • @sameoldsonganddance
      @sameoldsonganddance Місяць тому +1

      @@Elizabeth45840 Don’t cry for his loss, Smile because he was.❤️

    • @lisaruben4954
      @lisaruben4954 Місяць тому +2

      Prayers from Wisconsin to You

    • @elizabethyounkin9156
      @elizabethyounkin9156 Місяць тому +1

      Sending hugs and prayers

  • @RollingTidePod
    @RollingTidePod Місяць тому +5

    My dad died on Christmas so this video meant a lot to me as my life has never been the same.

  • @Qwazier3
    @Qwazier3 Місяць тому +24

    In my heathen days I was a biker chick. True story. Want to quiet a group of drunks down? Get out scissors, magic markers, colored pencils, glue, adult coloring books and blank paper. They all start to gravitate to the table and even the most hardened individual will eventually get sucked in and sit down. Smiles break out all over along with giggling. It's a sight to behold. Art is therapy. God's got you. Art on sister....🤗❤

  • @barbarameehan113
    @barbarameehan113 Місяць тому +19

    Our 55 yr. Old daughter passed away suddenly 3 mo. ago. We adopted her when she was 5 weeks old. Her 56th bd was yesterday Dec. 21, 2024. We had church. I wish we all celebrated but we didn't. We kinda were all in our own grief. Thank you for sharing your grief.
    Also this yr. I am dx with an agressive cancer, my hubbie was dx with cancer also. I am also facing heart surgery. Our Maryann was with us through all of this. I miss her so much.
    Love you Heather.❤

    • @lindybloom5
      @lindybloom5 Місяць тому +3

      @@barbarameehan113 prayers are being sent up for you both. 🙏🏻⭕️

  • @prudencelay6067
    @prudencelay6067 Місяць тому +27

    I am grieving the loss of my 22 year marriage - not something I wanted. My entire life will look different. I am 65 years old and I am scared and I am devastated.

    • @diann546
      @diann546 Місяць тому

      I don't know if it would suit your life, but look up Butterfly Tracks. She has quite a following of women who have gone on after losing a husband to death or divorce. It is a travel channel, but I keep it in mind, when worries of what I would do, if something happened to my husband surface.

    • @SusanHenry-kx2cm
      @SusanHenry-kx2cm Місяць тому +4

      @@prudencelay6067 May God Bless your New Journey ahead... In Jesus I Pray 🙏 Amen

    • @sameoldsonganddance
      @sameoldsonganddance Місяць тому +2

      @@prudencelay6067 You are more whole now standing alone then you ever were with a man that didn’t cherish you. If at all possible go on a short cruise enjoy doing everything you wanted to do.

    • @reynamagana7907
      @reynamagana7907 Місяць тому +1

      I agree with you !!!

    • @onlybev1
      @onlybev1 Місяць тому

      I know this is a devasting loss for you but I am also almost 65 yo and I couldn't imagine living with a man again. I love knowing I can do something or do nothing. I can eat what I want, don't need another opinion. I retired this year (semi-retired). I am an RN and I work on the weekends to supplement my SS income. I have never been more content in my life. Good luck.

  • @calit4157
    @calit4157 Місяць тому +24

    I am glad you found love again and remarried. I lost my husband almost 2 years ago to complications from cancer and I can't imagine doing that or even getting close to someone again. This grief has ripped my heart out and I will never allow myself to possibly go through that again. I have never felt anything this bad in my life. He was the first person I've lost that I loved that much. Not even losing my parents hurt this bad.
    You said that the person you were before Matt died, died also. That is so true. I died and I haven't come back the living. I really don't feel that I will.
    I have given this grief to the Lord so many times and I've taken it back from Him that many times, if that makes sense.
    Thank you for sharing your grief with all of us. God is shining His light through you. May God bless you.

    • @i2sky532
      @i2sky532 Місяць тому

      Oh, somehow I missed that she had remarried! How wonderful ❤

  • @gloriavelebir9335
    @gloriavelebir9335 Місяць тому +13

    I lost a husband 11 years ago. My Mom and Dad are gone. Last night and into the early morning I felt the extreme grief. When I got up I made a plan to give some of my sewn gifts to others who are hurting. I will take them to the personally and tell them that I want them to know that I care and understand. ❤

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +4

      I think that is an amazing way to help heal your heart, and help heal others as well....what a beautiful, loving act of kindness....all in your beloved husbands name..... I am so sorry Sis. :(

    • @lindybloom5
      @lindybloom5 Місяць тому +3

      @@gloriavelebir9335 how very sweet of you. And my prayers are with you . When your heart hurts giving to others is always so healing. You blessing others is so so heartwarming. God bless you

  • @Modfrkt_75
    @Modfrkt_75 Місяць тому +2

    Today is 6 years since I lost my husband. I need this today. Thank you for using your grief to help others ❤

  • @AnastasiaAlonso-gt3fe
    @AnastasiaAlonso-gt3fe Місяць тому +13

    I suffered for you and with you. I donate for you and your kids.. i have cried for you and prayed for you… Thank You Lord for her healing and the strength you gave her 💕 she has a huge mission to raise her kids.. the ones you Lord entrusted her with. Amen

  • @amied8161
    @amied8161 Місяць тому +11

    I found you right before your accident. I am so sorry and so happy for you at the same time. You are such a beautiful child of God. Thank you for these words of wisdom ❤

  • @mlang3066
    @mlang3066 Місяць тому +10

    You are so beautiful inside and out! Thank you for all you share with us..

  • @JenJean1234
    @JenJean1234 Місяць тому +5

    Thank you for all your words of affirmation. It's been many years for me, but I was in a horrific car accident in 2006. I was on my way home from Bible Study and it happened in front of a church. I was hit head on by a distracted driver. I was alone in the car, thank the Lord. I was rushed to emergency surgery, and as I was being operated on my husband told me he prayed "Lord, if you let her live you can take me." As I was slowly recovering, he began to show signs of becoming sick. After a year long illness, he passed away in 2008. I had guilt on top of my grief. Many times I cried and asked God why he didn't take me. I can relate to everything you talked about. Even all these years later, it still hurts. My faith has carried me every day. Our suffering is never in vain. Thank you again for this beautiful testimony. ❤

    • @truejoie
      @truejoie Місяць тому +1

      I'm sorry, this is heartbreaking. So many times in near death testimonies, the person hears God telling them, it's not your time to go. Truly all of our lives are in his hands. I truly believe that despite your husband's passing and the turn of event, it was simply not your time to go. I pray you can have peace with that and know your life's purpose. God bless you.

  • @wildflowerwanderer535
    @wildflowerwanderer535 Місяць тому +10

    Thanks for the good cry. My flock of young hens was just brutally killed by a fox this week. They were my family, not just chickens. I am deep in the grief. God Bless your heart ❤️

    • @jeanstephens9555
      @jeanstephens9555 Місяць тому +2

      @@wildflowerwanderer535 prayers

    • @bsusie1
      @bsusie1 Місяць тому +1

      So sorry for your loss.

  • @countingthecosttofollowChrist
    @countingthecosttofollowChrist Місяць тому +11

    Wow. Im not alone.I keep crying. The grief has been overwhelming.

  • @marygenrich4253
    @marygenrich4253 Місяць тому +5

    I recently found your channel. I am a grieving mother. Lost my son almost 14 years ago. I didn’t know Jesus then but I do know Him now. Thank you for sharing your story. It has comforted me. Happy you have found love on earth again.

  • @ldchristenson1267
    @ldchristenson1267 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for making this video. It really helped change my perspective around. I lost my son to suicide 14 yrs ago and 4 yrs ago my marriage of 20 years. I have felt everything you talked about and more. God Bless You!! I call myself a christian, but I havent trusted God with all my pain...I am stuck!

  • @cindiemounsey4166
    @cindiemounsey4166 Місяць тому +7

    My birthday is Christmas Eve as well. This is the first Christmas without my dad and brother who passed last Christmas. It's been tough especially for my mother.

  • @RachelsPartyOf5
    @RachelsPartyOf5 Місяць тому +5

    Thank you so much for these videos. I'm not grieving a death but grieving the loss of a 37-year marriage. It isn't exactly the same, but it is very very similar. Your words of encouragement mean more than you know. God Bless you Heather.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +2

      I am so sorry, that will definitely leave you grieving......same thing, it is a loss of what you thought it would be like.... it's so so painful, especially when betrayal of any kind comes into play. I am divorced from my first marriage......I know what a sucker punch that can be. I am so sorry, Mama.

  • @bubblescashmere6030
    @bubblescashmere6030 Місяць тому +10

    Beautiful Heather thank you for being a North Star on navigating healing from such a deep and difficult loss as well as your light and love beyond the grief and suffering. It is so helpful to many of us. I carry you in my heart daily even though i am half way around the world. May you feel the love and hope and joy you being so many ❤

  • @annemariewalker6334
    @annemariewalker6334 Місяць тому +5

    Thank you. You are such a blessing. I hope you will continue talking about grieving once in a while. My parents, older brother and aunts & uncles are gone and none of my siblings or cousins have lost a spouse. They don't understand how hard the holidays and special occasions are.

  • @christyjohnson6967
    @christyjohnson6967 Місяць тому +5

    Heather, I don’t have the words to thank you! I lost my husband of 45 years last April. I have struggled so much to navigate this crushing grief. I’m doing my best to learn from others the lessons here. But YOU my dear have put things in a perspective that gives me HOPE. HOPE that I can find my way without him. Thank you so very much. I have followed your journey from the beginning. Back in the day when your “purpose” was to teach us all to bake beautiful things. Your higher purpose has been revealed and I am so grateful for you. God Bless You! And thank you from the bottom of my broken heart. ♥️

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      Thank you Father God for using me and my testimony to touch Christy and her shattered heart, Father God......be with her, let her feel your presence and that you will never leave her side. Hope! Faith! Love! The fruits of the spirit.....that your husband helped to plant and water for 45 years..... what a love story you must have had! Legend!!!!!! What a reunion you will have with your beloved one day. Praise GOD!

  • @mayasilliman1465
    @mayasilliman1465 Місяць тому +11

    Heather, tragedy is bad enough but when it happens on holidays etc. it makes it far worse. There are no words I can say to help but I CAN continue to pray and ask God to assist your family throughout the days, months and years. Your strong belief in Jesus has saved you much emotionally to heal but it's a daily battle to even smile or feel like going on. Know that you are so loved. Please continue to post these videos so that we may share in your pain and happiness. xx

  • @andreacooley9428
    @andreacooley9428 Місяць тому +1

    I love you Heather thank you so much for all the kind words and your love for others❤🙏🏼🫶🏽

  • @jayneweathers
    @jayneweathers Місяць тому

    Thank you for obeying Father and allowing Him to use you to bless us. I've watched you on and off for years and cried along with you when Matt passed. Little did I know I would lose my husband of 46 years to cancer 16 months ago. I needed this!
    I need to learn how to obey Him and allow Him to grow me through this. ❤ Thank you, and may God continue to fill you with joy. ❤

  • @meganmckissick2281
    @meganmckissick2281 Місяць тому +3

    My mom died in a horrific accident on Christmas Eve 2008 (of course, a drunk driver hit her) so I get it! God Bless you and your family! I hope the New Year brings you & your loved ones wonderful health, happiness & tremendous prosperity!

  • @cheyenneskylark
    @cheyenneskylark Місяць тому +10

    I think you should make a giant butterfly collage from the cards and frame it. To remind you, you're strong, resilient despite the life challenges.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +5

      I have hundreds and hundreds. I think maybe one day making a wallpaper out of them. There are too many for a collage! hahaha On hard days, I used to randomly pull from that crate, and read.....many times letters came with those cards and photos, stories of encouragement and healing. They are PRICELESS to me! Maybe I will make a special bookshelf for them, a card shelf....that I can randomly draw from!

    • @kathypickens3309
      @kathypickens3309 Місяць тому

      I love that idea!❤

    • @ItsKentuckyNaNasLife
      @ItsKentuckyNaNasLife Місяць тому

      @@TheKneadyHomesteader ❤️🫶🏻❤️

  • @RetiredLovingIt
    @RetiredLovingIt Місяць тому +3

    I cannot thank you enough for your transparency. This is going to be helpful to so many people. 🙏

  • @susan06860
    @susan06860 Місяць тому +5

    What a beautiful testimony you have to help so many. I could feel God's presence as you spoke❤️

  • @terriv2176
    @terriv2176 Місяць тому

    Your words and scripture are such a blessing. Thank you. God is definitely working through you. We are all together in this. Love to you and your family.

  • @michelle7352
    @michelle7352 Місяць тому +1

    I'm a subscriber and have been since before the accident. When you were recovering and starting to make little videos here and there, it was hard for me to watch as I had so much unresolved grief. It was scary to see your grief as I would then project scary thoughts in the future around my loved ones. So I took breaks from watching. But tonight I watched this video and you were speaking straight to my heart. I won't go into detail but I wanted you to know how important this was for me and how I feel a little nudging about how to go from here. And I noticed how much you have changed. You've grown, your spirituality has deepend, you are walking proudly on your path even though you don't know where it leads. I'm not scared to watch you any longer because you are handling your grief and it doesn't overwhelm ME. Thank you my dear for sharing and teaching.. You are doing good!

  • @sandyjolley9810
    @sandyjolley9810 Місяць тому +1

    You are the strongest lady I know! Love you Heather!!

  • @LisaR76
    @LisaR76 Місяць тому +8

    Heather, you’re a light in this world!!! ❤🙌🏻🙏🏻 Jeremiah 29:11 “I know the plans I have for you”, Declares the Lord, “Plans to Prosper you & not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE & a FUTURE.” (One that helps me, too.) We are so blessed from all you share with us!! God bless you all!
    ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤Love ya!

  • @Roostandrescue
    @Roostandrescue Місяць тому

    Your tragedy hit me HARD. Weird to say because we have never met in person & barely interact online. But as an empath, I immediately put myself in your shoes & FELT all of it. You’ve been such a light in my life. You speak so well, I could listen to you read books! God bless!

  • @danielledineen5891
    @danielledineen5891 Місяць тому +2

    Thank you so much Heather! The balm you've brought to my heart this morning is unfathomable. This was definitely a divine appointment video. It's exactly what I needed to hear when I needed to hear it.

  • @ashtorfarm8866
    @ashtorfarm8866 Місяць тому +4

    Thank you Heather for sharing such words of wisdom. Grief is supposed to be hard…🙏

  • @willieboswell1682
    @willieboswell1682 Місяць тому +1

    I lost my 1st husband in 2012 to the horrible disease of Parkinson’s! We were married for almost 50 years. Romans 8:28 was his favorite scripture. Your video brings back a lot of memories. I remarried, after saying I never wanted to marry again. My 2nd husband was so good to me. He had heart problems and a cancer survivor. I lost him in April. At 81 I’m adjusting to life alone which has not been easy. I’m thankful for my daughter who is a source of strength for me. God knows the future and I must trust Him! Blessings to you and your family! Your videos touch so many.

  • @staceydoten845
    @staceydoten845 Місяць тому +5

    Humbled to listen to your story and journey. So many layers, with learning and love. God bless you, Heather ❤️

  • @moonlighteternal8024
    @moonlighteternal8024 Місяць тому +1

    Dear Heather, that was a really deep and beautiful message you shared in your video to us and I thank you for that. Ifeel your pain but on the other side I salute you for your bravery and confronting your grief head on. You are correct, we all will suffer grief during this journey of ours and navigating it is not always easy but with our Lord beside us to call upon whenever we need, we can survive.
    Matty is always with you. I lost my Dad in February, He was 81. He had Leukaemia and fought hard for 7 years to stay with us. Losing him hurts but Iknow we will meet again. When I'm sad, I allow it. I allow myself to drown in those tears because he is worth it. You said the same thing that I said to my sister..'they are worth every tear we cry..
    You are so admired by me Heather and I am so glad I found you.
    I am happy that you have Danny to be there in Matt's honor. That is beautiful.
    I wanted to add also that you are looking really lovely and your hair is very pretty.
    When you get a chance, please let me know where you got your bibles.
    Thank You for everything, Heather. Blessings be Yours. With Love and Light from Michelle' in South Africa. xx

  • @bjrudder8538
    @bjrudder8538 Місяць тому +3

    I want to thank you I am still in need of grief counseling I will be going back to grief share in August but I will be right beside you for the grief sharing you are doing. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @pattyborden5400
    @pattyborden5400 24 дні тому

    Heather, I don't think I've ever heard more beautiful advice and heartfelt love shown. Also, your comment on depression and anxiety's causes was so deep. Years ago I heard a pastor say that when having guilt-filled thoughts, to ask: "Am I being condemned or convicted by this thought? If it is condemnation, it is from Satan; if it is conviction, it is from God. God convicts, but Satan condemns." That advice has saved me countless hours of self-bashing, and I'm sure your depression/anxiety comment will help those who struggle with that. Thank you for your caring heart and willingness to share despite the sorrow.

  • @trapped7534
    @trapped7534 Місяць тому +3

    I love you my friend. Thanks for these videos….they are much needed.

  • @liap1293
    @liap1293 Місяць тому +3

    You are such a comfort to the grieving. I especially appreciate your examples of what grief looks like in your thoughts & actions. Thank you.

  • @mishalea
    @mishalea Місяць тому +3

    Merry Christmas, sweetheart! ❤✝️🎁🎄☃️🦌 I pray the HS gives your heart a big hug from me. Love and blessings..💖

  • @comfortcreekranch4948
    @comfortcreekranch4948 Місяць тому +4

    Thank You Heather! 💕🌷

  • @suzystone244
    @suzystone244 Місяць тому +1

    Greetings from Northern California.
    Glad I found you.
    Heartfelt.
    Transparency is much needed in today's world.
    Grief is a topic well worth talking about. It's part of our healing. Being vulnerable.
    Here's an idea...
    Make a large collage with those cards and frame this.❤

  • @Bikerdogkash
    @Bikerdogkash Місяць тому

    It's so lovely you celebrate all the important anniversaries of your hubby for your kids. My daddy died when I was 7 yo, he was 33. I'm in my 60's now. I lost almost all of the memories of him before cancer. He died of sinus cancer which eventually manifest on his eye and cheek bone - it was scarey and horrible to look at. I only have memories after and not many of those. My mom didn't speak of my daddy while my brother and I were young, it was as if he didn't exist. I particularly watched my son in law and grandchildren when he was around that age just to witness what was probably going on in my life at that age. I've concluded that I lost my memory from that deep loss as I really lost my mom too. It was as if my dad never existed. There was no talk of grief or grieving although my mom clearly was. It was so badly handled. My mom had his body in a casket in our home which was small, it was a funeral home for 3 days. I wish we could have talked about him and celebrated all the special days. Just know your celebrating all Matt's special days is so good especially for your kids. I went to two hypno therapists to try to remember some good and I did remember one short memory of him teaching me to ride my bike. I was so happy! Maybe I should have continued to try more. You are in the same situation as my mom was. I really appreciate what you're doing with love ❤ - Shelly

  • @stephaniepapaleo9001
    @stephaniepapaleo9001 Місяць тому +5

    This is what I needed today. Grief of my parents, has hit me hard, pulling me back and I hide it from my family and thought, oh I’m ok but really, I’m stuck in that past, taking my joy…I need to pray and look forward to the new days ahead, staying grateful for what I do have, new grsndbabies and a great job, friends, I just needed to hear this from a perspective of someone who knows devastating hurt but lives in the sparkle and joy of life. Thank you so much. ❤rest in peace, Matt & happy birthday in heaven, please keep watching over your family.

    • @AnastasiaAlonso-gt3fe
      @AnastasiaAlonso-gt3fe Місяць тому

      @@stephaniepapaleo9001 i lost my parents as well 3 years ago… i guess i live in the past… depression and loss of joy of life has hit me hard. I even notice some new wrinkles stemming from sadness in my face …

    • @ItsKentuckyNaNasLife
      @ItsKentuckyNaNasLife Місяць тому

      ​@@AnastasiaAlonso-gt3feI feel that So Deeply 😮😢💔❣️... I don't even know who I am when I look in the mirror 🪞 Anymore, or Care to try n find myself 😭 anymore 😔❣️... ... Bunches of 💞💖💞 love n light ✨ 🕯️✨❣️

  • @bethfilighera855
    @bethfilighera855 Місяць тому +3

    Girl, you have touched my hard heart. Bless you.

  • @wingrdr21
    @wingrdr21 Місяць тому +2

    I lost my husband in 2022 and I went to grief share which was good. I never realized that when we go through hard circumstances it is trauma. Putting a name to the way I was feeling really helped. I also have the creative Bible. It is awesome. You are an inspiration with all you have gone through. I moved away to be with my granddaughter… just to have some peace and be with my great grandkids that bring joy. My problem is more regrets of things I should have done or said.

  • @marshalay-hs2zg
    @marshalay-hs2zg Місяць тому +2

    Simply beautiful, Heather.

  • @Honeybadger7
    @Honeybadger7 Місяць тому +1

    Amen! This was very helpful. Thank you.😊

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      This is why the Lord had me share. Makes my heart so happy knowing i could help on just the littlest way. ❤️‍🩹 Makes me feel like Matt’s legacy continues to serve a purpose. He didn’t die in vain. ❤️‍🩹🙏🏼

  • @sharonb.7867
    @sharonb.7867 Місяць тому

    PLEASE READ TO THE END. I love your authenticity 😢. It is Christmas day and I am 12:46 into your video I am going to watch the rest tomorrow. 😢 Five days ago we "celebrated " the 40th anniversary of my brother's death. Before I share about that I want to share the thought God gave me as I grieved deeply this year. The unsaved go through "bumps in the road" "tragedy" and whatever name you want to apply to deep loss and other hard and difficult situations. For and to what end? As believers the Bible is clear that we go through "trials", "tribulations" and "testing". 😢 As believers we have PURPOSE in those moments (and years). The purpose is to make us more Christ-like and to bring glory to a holy and righteous God! When God brought me that contrasting thought I was blown away and sat quietly in it. It eased the pain again as I have grieved my brother's loss this year. We were both at the same Bible college, he a handsome freshman and me a junior. I had waited with anticipation for a year and a half for him to come to be at college with me. To cut this a little bit short (I apologize I am long winded) he came and said goodbye to me at my work. I begged him NOT to head home for Christmas break because the weather was supposed to turn bad. . .but greater than that I had dreamed he died. Four hours later my daddy, a pastor, called my college dorm to tell me my brother had died in a single car accident. He passenger walked away with scratches and bruises. I could write so much. . .grief is a long and individual journey. Thank you again for sharing. You are a gift of rare form.

  • @lizelvlok5867
    @lizelvlok5867 Місяць тому +2

    You are such a blessings.❤

  • @rpal320
    @rpal320 Місяць тому +2

    Thank you! Big soft hugs! 💖💕🎄

  • @BlueberryGirl723
    @BlueberryGirl723 Місяць тому +2

    Words of wisdom so beautiful said. Thank you Heather! ❤️🌹Blue~

  • @SaveTheBees
    @SaveTheBees Місяць тому +3

    You know, I don’t always comment bc I know you’re busy reading so many but please know, I’m here for you and myself. Dec 14th was the 10 years mark of my first borns death. Adam was 39. So I think of him more at this time of year. Wow, you really get it Heather! Someone out there gets me. Thank you. So much
    🌺🐝🌺

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +1

      I really do get it.....you and I need to sit and have a phone chat one day.....maybe after the new year? I would love that, and love to hear about Adam. xoxoxo !0 years, seems so long ago you heard his voice yet the pain feels like you just lost him yesterday. Grief is crazy like that. I love when you comment, by the way. xoxoxox

    • @SaveTheBees
      @SaveTheBees Місяць тому

      @@TheKneadyHomesteaderyes, absolutely! I would be blessed to talk. Thank you. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you, Danny and children 🌺🐝🌺🐝🙏🏼

  • @rvnana6606
    @rvnana6606 Місяць тому +1

    We will always be with you. Recently after 3 years I have finally crawled out of my pit of grief after my husband graduated to heaven. I have finally accepted that there is still a plan for me. I pray for all that grieve.

  • @lisacrummett1279
    @lisacrummett1279 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for this video. I lost my 34-year-old son almost 3 years ago. It was a tragic accident and so sudden I couldn’t recover very well because I was so close to him. The only thing I could say when it happened was ‘I cannot do life without him.” I went into a dark place. I taught Grief and Loss groups for 4 years but that didn’t prepare me. My hardest question was, was this God or the devil I couldn’t talk to God for a long time, but I felt him holding me. Loss is inevitable so it helps to learn from others how to navigate.

  • @resurrectionsunday4164
    @resurrectionsunday4164 Місяць тому +2

    Thank you. ( said with a guarded heavy heart) ❤️

  • @Kathy-y7e
    @Kathy-y7e Місяць тому +3

    Soooooooooo love you and your children!
    Blessings in the New Year!
    Thrive in 2025!

  • @cgelmore488
    @cgelmore488 Місяць тому +2

    Grief is so hard when you lose a piece of your heart. I love your bibles and your hair. I found you on YT when your hardest video was in my feed. God is good and Mat is in heaven in perfect peace. You will all meet again soon. Life is short. XOX

  • @jillcoe4695
    @jillcoe4695 Місяць тому

    Thank you so much. It was the 1 yr anniversary of losing my husband of 36 yrs. 2 days ago. All my love to you.

  • @chrisnewland8059
    @chrisnewland8059 Місяць тому +1

    Prayers continous prayers for you and your family

  • @barbarafuoco1674
    @barbarafuoco1674 Місяць тому

    Wow that talk was great! I’ve been grieving my first husband’s death for 20+ years and can’t get past it. Even though I remarried and he’s gone now too I grieve more over my first

  • @janetatkinson9023
    @janetatkinson9023 Місяць тому +3

    Thank You Heather. Prayers please for a young lady her name is Ella

  • @kathyelam2196
    @kathyelam2196 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for sharing your heart, and all of your talents with us. Merry Christmas to you sweet Heather and your family as well ❤

  • @resurrectionsunday4164
    @resurrectionsunday4164 Місяць тому +1

    Thanks!

  • @henrycooks1883
    @henrycooks1883 Місяць тому +1

    Those are the most beautiful bibles I have ever seen. What kind thoughtful comments you have, such support, the comfort it gives you must be overwhelming. I’ve watched your journey, your loss, your recovery, and for you to share your pain, it helps us find hope for ourselves more than you know.

  • @floraledet6973
    @floraledet6973 Місяць тому +1

    I love you heart it’s so pure and beautiful. God is carrying you beautiful lady…day by day and it will only get better as time goes and as you allow God to take you DEEPER you will go to levels you will never fathom and through your channel we do it TOGETHER!!!! Praying for you sweet sister, God Bless You💕

  • @AlternativeHomesteading
    @AlternativeHomesteading Місяць тому +2

    Blessings

  • @bsusie1
    @bsusie1 Місяць тому

    Thank you Heather! Such a needed topic. I’ve been hit with grief since birth. Both parents left world early. Was put in orphanage at 5 years old. I won’t go into all the torture and pain I endured.
    Was difficult to mainly encounter believers that tried to say any negative encounters were my fault if I didn’t quickly act in ways they felt measured up to what the Bible teaches. It’s taught me to walk in forgiveness and not to assume people are always at fault when things are difficult. It’s definitely strengthened my relationship with the Lord, but to open my heart to people is still very difficult. Healing is a process. To encounter others that have been broken and walking it out helps along the journey.

  • @sarahcontento9516
    @sarahcontento9516 Місяць тому +1

    I have thoughts and feelings swirling around in my mind. Love ya girl.

  • @jglorytogod70sambo16
    @jglorytogod70sambo16 Місяць тому +1

    Heather you are such a precious sister in Christ!! God is using you in mighty ways. Thank you for your words they mean so much!❤❤❤

  • @Dolly9261
    @Dolly9261 Місяць тому +1

    I cried through half of this. Twenty months ago I lost my husband to cancer. We would have been married 40 years last month. I can relate to everything you talked about. The two verses you had painted I heard over and over in different places. I've dealt with what I call flashbacks. All of a sudden I would be remembering things from the past, things I had completely forgotten about. I had widows fog and depression, I've cried every single day since he died and I had moved farther away from God. I've recently started bible study and getting back on track with God. I couldn't wrap my head around why everyone kept talking about hope...I get it now.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +1

      oh Dolly, I am so sorry. I think everything you experienced is completely normal and expected, and so happy to hear you are moving back towards Him..... His love sustains it all. The widows fog is real! 40 years.....what a love story you must have had! And still have! Your love goes on.....

  • @googiesfairyfarm4834
    @googiesfairyfarm4834 Місяць тому +1

    You always bless me no matter what you say… Thank you so much!🙏🏻

  • @FBIagent22-q1d
    @FBIagent22-q1d Місяць тому +4

    You are gorgeous! I am sorry you are having to endure this.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +3

      thank you, it's OK! I appreciate you being here and listening to me. :)

    • @halfanewfie2
      @halfanewfie2 Місяць тому +1

      @@TheKneadyHomesteader May will be 15 years for me being widowed. By myself.. No kids, just me.

    • @FBIagent22-q1d
      @FBIagent22-q1d Місяць тому

      @@TheKneadyHomesteader I started watching you when I was looking for vids on how to make homemade vanilla. I loved how your husband supported you and ached to see you going through this horrible experience. You are truly a WonderWoman.

  • @JaneSmith-x4x
    @JaneSmith-x4x Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for sharing 😊

  • @jc10907Sealy
    @jc10907Sealy Місяць тому +1

    God bless you ❤ in this difficult transition and change of life in the loss of your husband and father of your children. Prayers for you and family. 🙏

  • @jackiegabriel6452
    @jackiegabriel6452 Місяць тому +1

    You are one Amazing woman! You really helped me today. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

  • @AmyLouiseDens
    @AmyLouiseDens Місяць тому

    I sure can appreciate what all this is like for Danny. He's a hero! I sing his praises ❤ May God richly bless your entire clan.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      He is the calm to my storm. He walked us through so many surgeries, and therapies. Our marriage was NOT built on passion and romance, that is for sure. hahaha God built it on a bedrock of love and compassion, tenderness and vulnerability, sorrow and yet laughter. It is incredible how our Father heals us.

  • @MiscMitz
    @MiscMitz Місяць тому +2

    🙏

  • @sheisbeetee
    @sheisbeetee Місяць тому

    ❤ I love your channel. New here a few months. My mom passed mother's day 2018 and I attended griefshare twice. I searched online for someone to talk to and this was best fit for me. Even today, a friend said see you later to his spouse and I suggested griefshare. For me, that was great timing. When she passed, I did not have time to grieve, long story, and had to shift, pack,move and not be homeless 😢. I cannot imagine losing a spouse. Interesting about your nde and thats comforting. 😊 yes we all need to ask for help.

  • @tammyglaim6733
    @tammyglaim6733 Місяць тому

    I've subscribed to your channel as of now..just came across the Hardest Video you would ever make...my heart is broken for you. I am so sorry it was hard to watch but I had to to feel your heart. i will continue to support your channel and pray fot you and your beautiful kids. love you beautiful soul xxxx

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      Thank you for watching and your kind words, I appreciate you. ❤️‍🩹

  • @dwtwo533
    @dwtwo533 Місяць тому +3

    Hugs 🤗 ✝️🕊️RIP ❣️🙏

  • @renaclements6634
    @renaclements6634 Місяць тому

    Heather, sweetheart, you are such a blessing. You are able to use the right words to help those who are in pain. Sometime, watch Joyce Meyer, she is the one that I was listening to 5 years ago, when I was led to open my heart to God. I always knew him, but I never followed in his footsteps Now never a day goes by that I don't thank him for who I am and all that he has done for me. I am 78 and he has kept me here for a reason. God bless you and your family, I hope you have a safe and happy holiday season.

  • @jules-marcdavis6843
    @jules-marcdavis6843 Місяць тому

    God Bless Your Family This Holiday Season. ❤ This was so helpful to me and i really appreciate when you share your process.

  • @ChristinaMelton-t8z
    @ChristinaMelton-t8z Місяць тому +1

    I’m telling you, I still think you’re an angel amongst us. You have helped me so much. My journey is completely different. (Not a death) But you always give me hope and keep me grounded. You are truly a blessing. ❤

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      you are so sweet....trust me, I am no angel....the more I learn about myself and my brokenness, the more I realize just how much I needed a savior! But I am so humbled that God can use my testimony for His purpose. All glory to Him!

    • @ChristinaMelton-t8z
      @ChristinaMelton-t8z Місяць тому

      I believe you have turned into one. Grief is something we all go through. I never thought mine would be losing three of the four I love the most in the world. My world came crashing down 3 1/2 years ago when our children decided they no longer wanted us. My councilor said it is worse than actual death. Because they are still alive and want nothing to do with us. No contact, their choice. The road for us is similar, all the different stages of grief. Also, the acceptance of no guarantee of closure. That's where our loving God comes in. And Jesus. He has picked me up so many times. Trust in him always. And I listen to you and see how much he has carried you and your family. I love how you explain everything. It's reminds me of how much we are loved as his children. May God bless you. I hope you liked the shawl if you decided to open it. 🙂

  • @texaslady7630
    @texaslady7630 Місяць тому

    ❣Thank you for your videos. Sending hugs and prayers. Merry Christmas. Also, you are such an inspiration and pretty young lady.

  • @faithunseen123
    @faithunseen123 Місяць тому

    Thank you for sharing this with all that are living with loss and grief. May God's Comfort be with all that lost loved ones.Hope you all have a Blessed Christmas and a Blessed New Year🙏💕

  • @carlworrall
    @carlworrall Місяць тому +1

    Keep your head up and keep smiling

  • @judyberends7021
    @judyberends7021 Місяць тому +3

    Merry Christmas 🎄🎁 to your family.

  • @meganmckissick2281
    @meganmckissick2281 Місяць тому +1

    My faith has been challenged when my mom was killed by a drunk driver Christmas Eve in 2008. You have helped me...

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      All glory to God!🙏🏼❤️‍🩹 I am so sorry about your Mom. 😭 You and I share a similar grief. I am so sorry. 💔

  • @GlamonaDime
    @GlamonaDime Місяць тому

    You are an amazing being of God. Thank you for this message!

  • @RetiredLovingIt
    @RetiredLovingIt Місяць тому

    This series is anointed

  • @lindybloom5
    @lindybloom5 Місяць тому +1

    Heather we are all with ya sister. My heart aches every single day for my mom and my dad . I had a very similar thing happen to me after my dad passed. He came to me and spoke out loud clear as a bell to me. I also had to reach out for help after my mom passed, same thing for the tools to get me through . We are so similar the more I share and the more you share. Love you 🙏🏻❤️❌⭕️🙏🏻.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому +1

      i love that, Lindy! Losing your two biggest pillars in your life, is so difficult..... your identity changes....I have talked to many who have lost their parents, it really is a feeling of being orphaned, even though you are grown! We always need our parents. I am so sorry, Sis.

    • @lindybloom5
      @lindybloom5 Місяць тому

      @@TheKneadyHomesteader our parents are our biggest fan And yes it’s a total emptiness. Thank you for always being so relatable. I love that about you. ! ❌🥰

  • @laurielivingston7160
    @laurielivingston7160 Місяць тому +1

    How wonderful of u to make these videos to help so many❤ I have followed u since ur tramatic accident as i was healing from my brain aneurysm/hemorrhagic stroke. Ur one of fhe strongest women i know. Our faith n God keeps us strong. Merry Christmas and many blessings ❤

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      I am so glad these videos are helping! ❤️🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 You are so strong! How are you recovering now? How are you doing?

    • @laurielivingston7160
      @laurielivingston7160 Місяць тому

      @TheKneadyHomesteader I'm doing great thanks to God! I'm truly blessed to b alive, I had a 50/50 chance. I will always have 'differentabilities' like short term memory issues arm weakness too much brain stimulation lol but I'm healing every day💪

  • @anneadkins4403
    @anneadkins4403 Місяць тому

    Thank you so much for being so bold to make this video. Every thing you speak has been in my heart. Thank you for ministering to me and others. Merry Christmas!🎄❄️☃️⛄️❤

  • @laurafitzpatrick9667
    @laurafitzpatrick9667 Місяць тому +1

    I am so very sorry for your loss. I just started following you since the fema post so I don't know the story. I thank you for sharing. I loss my daughter 44 years ago. Those moments will never go away. I do tell myself I can grieve two days a year. The day she was born and the day she died. I always tell myself it would not be fair to my husband and children if I was swallowed up in grief. And I certainly know the what-if. And what would she be like. Or how things would've been. I look at death differently now I'm older. Sending prayers for you and your family.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      Oh Laura, I am so very sorry for the loss of your baby girl. 💔 Thank you for sharing that with me. I am so glad you are here. My husband and two youngest kiddos, 5 and 8 at the time, were hit head on my a drunk driver. It was a 125mph impact. Killing him, critically injuring me and seriously injuring both of our babies. It happened Valentine’s Eve, 2021. 💔

    • @laurafitzpatrick9667
      @laurafitzpatrick9667 Місяць тому

      ​@@TheKneadyHomesteaderSo very kind of you to reply when you have so many followers on youtube. My heart breaks for you and your children. I believe God puts people in your life for a reason and who you need. So Thank you!

  • @lisasaruga2443
    @lisasaruga2443 Місяць тому

    I only just discovered your channel. My word, what a shining example of redemption you are. I am a fellow Michigander and trauma therapist. My book, The Trauma Tree: Going Beyond Survival, Growing Toward Wholeness releases Feb 11 of this year. Your story is a glowing example of the coexistence of lament and hope. You are beautiful inside and out. I would love to connect with you one day. My prayers are with you.

    • @TheKneadyHomesteader
      @TheKneadyHomesteader  Місяць тому

      LISA!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!! I want to ready your book!!!!!!! I am so excited for you! Will it be available on Amazon?