When Family Gets in the Way of Your Music
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- Опубліковано 17 вер 2024
- Family and artistic endeavor often clash. Sometimes Family Gets in the Way of Your Music. Here's how to navigate these difficult waters.
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The one thing I learned about making music with a family and a full time job: make it quick! Find ways to simplify, speed the process up, spend less time on tech details, be prepared.
Bill knows what he’s saying with loved ones being top priority. My fiancé died a few years ago and I have no close family. Besides my job, all the time in the world. Having family to share your musical journey with is special and another reason to prioritize family.
It’s not that you don’t appreciate what you have, it’s that it’s hard to believe it can suddenly be gone so soon, in the blink of an eye.
Dude, you're telling the truth. Back when we were young and had time on our hands, we could afford vast amounts of foolish use of time and still learn our instruments, jam with friends, be in bands. Once you start to build a family, you have to put groceries on the table and a roof over big and little heads. I didn't pick up a guitar for twelve years once a got married. In retrospect, that may not have been necessary, but I believe that period taught me many lessons of life. When I picked the guitar up again, I had some life things sorted out, was able to approach the instrument with a fresh mind, and, most importantly for me, a much smaller ego. Summed up, your family supports your art. Rarely will your art support your family. I realize that as an artist, I need my art in order to be fully me, but it's not like I can't sacrifice for a greater cause. I'm 71, still playing, and still married to the same girl. Bill, you keep on with this, please.
Having a creative flow state interrupted can be irritating to downright painful. It’s a tough balance, but having an understanding spouse is huge.
Love this Bill. I've been getting up early to work on music before anyone else is awake. It gives me a set amount of time instead of staying up too late at night, which has helped me work more efficiently.
Great idea Craig!
Wow, that family pick sure does do wonders for me. I really hope to end up like this in my old age. Making zen guitar music, having a large Family and just existing in peace everyday.
Thanks so very much for your words of wisdom Bill. I agree family 1st. And use your spare time wisely. Take small steps to get where you want to go. I’m 71 and just released my first song on all the streaming services. Much thanks to you ✨💛🙏
Making a separate space and then setting up the gear so it all turns on with just a couple if switches really boosted my time spent playing. Plus, my wife makes quilts, so she appreciates when I disappear for a few hours.
We create music for our children, who will listen once we have left. Thank you.
"Let me tell you how to make more music..."
Literally saves your marriage and gives you the tools for a healthy life. 👍🏼👍🏼
Thank you. I do spend a lot of time nourishing my relationships with my children and my wife. I do work part time with my own coaching business and I try my best to just spend 10 minutes playing my guitar, which usually turns into an hour or so. Thank you for the great advice!
As a teen, I don't really have te responsibilities of a parent but I have learned alot, especially in terms of priorities. I often sit and doom scroll only to realise im out of time to work on my metal, ambient or synth stuff. I have learned alot from your priorities section. Thank you Master, I shall adhere to your teachings.
It's amazing how much you can get done in a short amount of time, probably the same as can in long session
"The job expands to fit the time at hand."
After forty years of self cultivation and custom made skills, the thousands of miles of knowledge made me unrecognizable. I have no nostalgia for forgotten footprints in time. My freedom changes lives and I will keep rockin🤟🎸
The children each must be given an instrument they like. They must be hamded some kind of musical instrument otherwise they’ll be neglected. They will surely join in. We’re working on avant-garde noise currently.
I just paused to address the epic family photo. This is fantastic! Chaotic, loving and so full of authentic smiles! Thanks for sharing your wisdom, brother! This video is priceless.
I really enjoy these videos on navigating being an artist with a balanced life!
You are clever Bill. Love your videos. Thank you for sharing and for your contribution to the world of music. Much respect and appreciation for all your hard work.
Wise words Bill! You are an inspiration!
Wise words there. I am a visual artist as well as a musician, and an "old guy" now at the age of 71. My wife and I have been married since 1978 (46 years) and together for even longer. One learns to make sacrifices if one wants to hang on to a relationship for that long. It is never easy (no one in their right mind would say otherwise). And, alas, even now, at my age I still have the occasional adult child moving home and invading my physical music/art space - it was once their (or one of their sibling's) bedrooms. So it goes. Fortunately, I can do a lot with just a computer (or a tablet) in a corner somewhere. True, it is not as immersive as playing in "quad" in my foam covered studio space, but good headphones will do for now. The biggest pain for me (especially because I am, as I said, an "old guy", is moving my mountain of gear out to a pile in the garage to gather dust, while my child makes up their mind on what to do next with their life. Moving all that gear is a tough chore for this old body of mine. It takes me a whole day. I have done this a number of times now. Our "nest" never seems to be completely empty. Our "boomerang" kids keep coming back and staying for months at a time. I hope I live long enough to see them settle and stay away on their own. They will have to do it eventually. In the meantime I make do with little moments of creativity in a corner somewhere. I am not happy about it. But, it is what it is.
Bless you for helping your boomerang kids. Love is always the first thing.
Fug dat. You lived a whole full life just to be pushed in the corner! I remember an old saying, "When you are young you go where you lead yourself but when you are old you go where other's may lead you. I am not criticizing you on a personal level, I only hope for you and myself peace and power in our older years.
Solid, Solid advice. Gear reviews are cool and all, but this kind of advice is invaluable. It especially resonates with me since I am getting back into music, now with a wife and four kids. One other piece of advice I would offer, is that if you're creating music with other people (like in a band setting) find people that are on the same level as you. If they have similar obligations as you (a family to take care of) then they wont expect more commitment than you're able to accommodate.
Excellent point!
Just excellent.
Fabulous post Bill! Thanks for the reminder.
Excellent, thoughtful video, as always, and an extremely important subject that's seldom discussed in the world of music. I've known professional musicians who were able to strike that balance between music and family, and those who, sadly, were not able to.
Fix your life to a background of ambient guitar - the sage of Orion
Needed this Bill; thank u friend
I second the small time chunk tip also from a creative point of view. It's also good to prevent getting bogged down in too much detail.
Sometimes I just sit down I think, "Ok, I don't have time to delve deep into this piece so I'll just write the drums." Or find a guitar or synth tone for that part I have a few ideas about.
These are all kinda "menial" jobs that I wouldn't want to waste time on when I'm deep into creative mode.
Good afternoon dear musical friend, Your words should be set in stone and read by everyone in the morning. I think much the same about family, children and now a 2 month old granddaughter. Fortunately, I already have the advantage that I have basically stopped my work activities after 35 years of managing my small companies. Photography is my lifelong hobby, I have a bag with appropriate photo equipment in every car. I regret only one thing, I devoted too much time and energy to work (I slept 4-5 hours a day, basically my whole working life, 10 weeks of vacation in 30 years..., partly at the expense of my health, but nothing fatal So I'll write this maybe a little selfishly, in the last quarter maybe I'm on my own (especially regarding my music, the creation of a small studio, etc.), of course, while fully respecting what you said in the beginning of your video. I wish you all the best Pavel CZ.👍👍👍
Totally agree, Bill
Very important topic.
Great relationship advice.
Your six week EP challenge is what launched my Ambient Music project.
I may take it up again but instead do six songs in six weeks. People consume music very differently today. I've had greater success with singles than EPs
a lot wisdom, for free 😊
Looking at those Family pictures... I'm thinking someone may have added something to the Brownies?
All great advice! Playing ambient guitar is the most addictive drug I've ever known. Hard to do in small chunks, but I've now got all my gear ready to go at the flip of a couple switches. Made a goal to play every day, even if it's just for 20 minutes.
Dude. You have no idea how much I needed to see this video.
I love the Music that you are creating in the background of these "talks".......
Something I need to learn how to do. THX much for your inspirations.
My kids are going to be my band. We’re just goofing but that’s how it starts. Much more rewarding creating with them than some band members I’ve had. My kids and I just have fun. They’re young and if they grow into it I’m going to have a BLAST.
I needed this video
thanks for your video bill..the greatest achievements in your life, always come from a balanced view..in whatever it is you are pursuing..and the best APP ,to connect your life with, is, ATTITUDE..PERCEPTION..PRESCENCE OF MIND...with these three balanced views..anything can be achieved..take care..tj
Happiness and joy, from having a family, is only temporary. You're also guaranteed some pain and suffering. On a lighter note, the music always keeps playing 😉
Solid advice brother. Thank you
Family #1
Music #2 (or 99)
(Statement from the perspective of a professional musician, producer, artist, sound engineer, editor.)
I make a song/theme in 1 to 1,5 hours in Cubase and store it.
Not every day, but that's how I make music
Mindfully push yourself
Nature photographer? Please share some of that, coupled with your music. Pretty please😜!
My wife has a tendency to talk alot so i just tell her i'm going to put my headphones on and she shuts up.
Music, family, and community are inseperable from music. For me my music comes from my family - my mother the origin, her mother hers. My children all play music, every moment is spent (outside of watching this video) on the practice of music.
I am living the bachelor dream!
Good for you man. I do not agree that there can be a balance. It's all or nothing. You're either in or you're out. This is delusion. Family are time bandits, once they're needs are met and the day is done you're toast. You do need time and lots of it to make music that doesn't sound like ass. It takes me a few hours just to warm up to play let alone to be in a creative frame of mind. You need peace of spirit and mind to focus on the muse and practice session. Sorry, playing with the wife and kids and constant interruption is just not going to get it. The great composer Gustav Mahler, use to get away from his family to his composer's shack to create. He told his wife, who was also a musician, that there can be only one composer in the family and he use to carry a gun to rehearsals to deal with unruly orchestra members. The Beastie Boys said it best. "You have to fight for your right to party."
Well what I do here at the trailer park is I remind them that it is my music that allows them to live in the Luxury that they are accustomed to now with the hundreds of dollars I make in a year selling more cassettes than Elvis and the Beatles combined! That they can have pork n beans with their tuna, all 15 of them in the two room mobile home with now some gas lanterns
I play an hour a week or less to work 50 hours and be a father. I just play to escape reality . And my wife doesn't mind my loud music as long as my fatherly and Hubbby doos are done...
I bought Ableton Live over 6 years ago, I still have no idea how to work it because my family is constantly interrupting me.
After 30 seconds i thought: don‘t know if music is worth what you are planing there 😂
sell family off and acquire gear from the proceeds. no family - no problem.
😂
If you're retired like me, and your wife/significant other has a hobby they love and you're empty nesters there shouldn't be a need to do any of what's suggested here IMO.
phewf !!.....by the title i thought this might of been about murder/suicide!
… what?
@@Taylor_King ...?? What?? ...obviously its hypobole for comedic effect ...the joke being family between you and your guitar would lead to extreme
mesures? now you get it?
@@gavrilopricip11 fair enough… i find it a very strange comment to make on a very sincere and sweet video about family/values; but ok.
@Taylor_King
Seems he meant his initial impression of the thumbnail before viewing the video. The thumbnail did raise question in me as well, especially knowing Bill is a family man.
t
Another look in the mirror!
From "Tommy." "Look in the mirror boy."