How to Build Emotional Safety in Relationships (The #1 Ingredient for a Successful Marriage)
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- Опубліковано 28 сер 2024
- HOW TO BUILD EMOTIONAL SAFETY IN RELATIONSHIPS (THE #1 INGREDIENT FOR A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE)
Here’s a guide on how to build emotional safety in relationships. Emotional safety in relationships is absolutely crucial. In fact, emotional safety in marriage is probably the #1 ingredient you need for a successful relationship.
So this video will give you some emotional safety definitions and emotional safety meaning to help you understand what it is.
And once you learn how you can create emotional safety, your relationship can begin to flourish.
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Hey guys! Thanks for watching and I hope that was helpful. Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 5 Proven Steps to Rebuilding Your Relationship/Marriage. (Warning: Spots are limited)
💪 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> relationshipsmastered.com/healing-partner-emotions
🗣 Join the FB Group! -> facebook.com/groups/1032426806961329/
I have watched literally hundreds of videos, read books and engaged in counseling sessions, Geoffrey's way of explaining things really hit home and breaks through barriers. I recommend his content to anyone wishing to grow. Though he speaks in the context of relationships, his information is relevant across all aspects of life, all communication, all relationships.
Thank you!
@@GeoffreySetiawan I'm confused where the 4 day training series is.. I see the Heal Your Partners Emotions Guide and a link to the masterclass, but in the video thumbnail it looks like a guide. Where is it?
I had never heard of emotional safety before, but it makes sense that it is such an important factor in relationships. Great explanation and insights.
Thank you for tuning in!
Such wisdom in this video. Thank you. My marriage is working through this after destroying any form of emotional safety. During intense moments, we’ve both lost our marbles. It’s truly a skill to self regulate to not emotionally react to intense moments. This what have saved us a year ago but alas…here and now the work begins.
I'm a woman and this explains not just my experience with my ex but also with my mom my whole life. Every time I said anything different than her thought, even when I was just suggesting another option for her, she took it as a challenge against her to get mad. Probably this is why I don't believe 'talking things out' is possible with anyone.😢
I love your advice on leading conversations! It's such a good skill to have!
Yes, definitely! Thanks for tuning in!
crazy how you post 5x per week! also, i love how you see things are able to explain it thoroughly! :)
Thanks! Haha. Lots of relationship issues to go over :)
Thanks for tuning in! What other questions do you have about emotional safety that isn't addressed in the video?
I would love to see more videos on this topic. I would project bad notions from my trauma when interpreting partner’s emotions actions.
Can't thank you enough Geffery. providing value like this for people who can't afford the coaching yet.
You make it seem so simple and easy, yet it is mind boggling how complicated, deep and true all you post is; how much I find most elements of my story in there.
Hi Geo Starters,
It actually is quite easy when you find the right ways. Take a look at my countless clients stories who have all learned how and have seen massive success in their lives.
ua-cam.com/play/PLQ8tvyhQlPzsNm-vC_g_8SWGcJRngefgU.html
@@GeoffreySetiawan yes. I will be enrolling. Hope it really helps me mend myself and maybe het family back. Take care!
Thank you so much i made this error for over 15 years in my relationship and now i have some info to help me get it back on track thank you.
Awesome, this is exactly why I created this content to be able to help people repair and thrive in their relationships like I have and as have my clients.
This video was chock full of impactful information. The topic of what you can control within the relationship is huge. Great video!
Thanks Elizabeth!
Emotional safety， that totally makes sense, just like the oslos hierarchy. This is the first step.
Definitely. Just take that first next step. Thanks for tuning in!
Thank you so much. I feel empowered by this video even in the mist of my struggle. Can't wait for the master class.
Man, this video's are nailing my relationship on point!
Great videos are very original insights on relationships.
I totally identify myself with that, and is a great alternative to superficial or manipulative fixes to difficulties in the relationship.
Emotional safety.. it was an interesting topic to think about. But I believe it is really important!! Thanks for the info!
Thanks for tuning in YJP Studio!
Very insightful. I learned a new term today!
Awesome!
Although your series has spun out of control into such an overwhelming informative channel , I still follow the five principals and love the results the rich nuggets of wisdom, to absolute golden advice ! Geoff Five steps = Greatness !
Thank You for this video. I struggle with how to receive negative feedback in conversations & will take the course.
You’re emotional intelligence and empathetic reasoning is incredible! Keep it up
Hey for such a young guy you have an amazing wisdom of what’s happening in relationships between couples. Your videos are awesome. Thankyou
Super honored to get this comment. Thank you Lain :)
You explained it so thoroughly! So much value here, thanks for sharing!
Thanks for tuning in!
this is great! really enjoyed watching your video and loving your channel! keep them coming brother :)
Thanks for tuning in man!
AWESOME Geoffrey. Another great video from you. Love your energy man!
Thanks my friend! Thanks for your support!
For the first time in my life I heard someone say something smart. I really wish some husbands would take this to heart and get their balls back.
You're teachings are a gift to humanity, cheers mate 👍
Hey Geoffrey, so much information. You're amazing! Really impressed. Do you do anything else besides making brilliant video's? I'm serious, I want to know how you find the time to do it. I post 2 per week and wish I could do it full time because I love doing it.
Relationship tips are always good, but I'm single and LOVE being single. I've had relationships, great ones and open to more, but I travel the world and LOVE my freedom!
See you soon,
rachel
Haha :) Yes, I love to read and my girlfriend and I do try to spend more time together as we both work a lot. But for the videos, I just try to batch it as much as I can -- I typically can get all 5 videos done, uploaded and optimized in a full 12 hour workday.
Your content has helped make alot of sense of my current rs challenges thanks
Thank you so much, I so need this. Thank you for helping so many.
I'm able to open my emotional feelings to my partner but my wife will not open up any of her emotions to me at all no matter what I've done in a 10 year marriage and now she's left and says she's filing for a divorce I don't know how to stop this
These are geared towards men. But I started watching them and am getting a lot out of them myself
Julie -- I am so glad! And yes, this should apply to both men and women :)
Great video and you describe very nice what emotional safety is in a relationship. I would really like to make a video about emotional safety during pregnancy.
Timely information for me. I've been selfish in my outlook. Thank you!!
This is very good stuff and one of the most important things. Thanks, Geoffrey. You have talked about being bullet proof during intense emotional outbursts during the emotional safety building phase and that is great. But, can you address the situation where a partner who is feeling emotionally unsafe starts asking questions in between their emotional outbursts. For example, if she is expressing something intense or even blaming my past mistakes because all that has been bottled up for some time, I just need to be emotionally resilient. But, if she starts asking questions during those outbursts, like, "Tell me what would you have done if so and so said or did such and such thing to you?" "Don't you think so and so is an asshole?" And if she is really insisting for an answer, what to do here? I don't agree with her, but I don't really want to invalidate her at this point. A video on communication strategies during emotional outbursts will be great.
Hey man! I would just respond with something like this: I would feel X, Y, Z. I am assuming this is also how you feel. Can you tell me more about that? (Again, repeat/paraphrase & ask to clarify)
@@GeoffreySetiawan Thank you the response. Your approach makes sense and is so simple in hindsight and yet I have never learned to communicate this way. Glad to find your channel.
Powerful and clear ! Thank you so much !!
Love it!
I find the video really amazing but the one thing I didn't get was if your partner no longer loves you or no longer find you artractive then what does it matter if you have or not emotional safety? at the end of the day it is not like if they are just expressing you that you did something that bother them but if they no longer love you having emotional safety won't make any difference
Great stuff!
Thank you Rania!
Thank you very much sir. Now I have a baseline on what to do
Hi Jonathan,
You are welcome brother! Happy this video has been helpful…
Rebuilding safety & trust is crucial to having a thriving relationship.
You speak very well. Amazing content 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Hey Bearded Ham,
Thanks for the support and comment. LOL love the name :)
@@GeoffreySetiawan 😂😂😂, your welcome. Blessings
I love you bro this is pure gold!
Your getting it my friend! What did you like about my video the most?
Great advice here Geoffrey.Thank you
Hi Starting over with Martha,
Thank you for your support, I will continue to do my best to try and provide you guys with the most informative content.
Really good information. How did you figure out all of this?
Thank you Geoffrey
You know what's funny is that I had alot of this when I was younger. It's almost like I lost it as I got older and further into my last relationship. So sad but I have to start from the beginning now to make sure not to mess things up this time.
Hi ChitoS,
What are you going to different this time, to keep from "messing things up the next time"?
@@GeoffreySetiawan I mean I know I have no excuse but I want to know how to talk to her even though it weirds her out so much but I've started to talk to her with my bpv so that she can trust to talk to me again. I didn't have my bpv when we were together and when I did it was so short term and for calmer situations. I'm still learning alot and have been rewatching the beginning stages videos over and over and also took notes on the master classes and even watched a couple already. I do have one question tho. Like I stated, she seems to be avoiding me atm. I can sense she wants to talk to me but it's obvious she just wants to. Should I give her her space? I don't want to bug her beyond what I should but I can't communicate if she doesn't want to talk to me. What do I do in this situation?
I've been watching a bunch of your videos, I'm going through a rough situation, I have a girlfriend who lives in Australia and we used to spend every day on xbox live watching movies and playing games and UA-cam videos she even came to visit me once, from what I've seen, I destroyed emotional safety, the problem is I didn't understand what was wrong until it's too late she gave me like 4 chances but things just kept getting worse. She says she just wants to be friends because she just wants to be alone she says she can be a good bestfriend but I don't want that, I don't treat her like a bestfriend if I did we wouldn't have gotten so close to begin with
I know I destroyed emotional safety, but she doesn't want to give us a chance, we are in this break up not broken up phase
I'm in alot of pain , I've asked her to try and give us a chance she says she doesn't want to try, and don't want to lie to her and say let's be friends knowing I want more
I really liked the relationship mountain video it explained alot, I wish I would have discovered you sooner
Never too late my brother!
How can I bring up the topic of emotional safety without making it seem like I'm blaming her?
What about when there is a pattern of the same insecurity brought up nonstop?
If someone is always concerned about “someone else”, at some point don’t you need to be like “you can’t keep harping on this issue, I’ve told you you don’t need to worry” ?
Hi Pride, please consider joining my free FaceBook group where me or a member of my team can help answer this question a bit better.
facebook.com/groups/1032426806961329/
she asked for space. when she reaches back out what exactly should your first conversation be? to start building the emotional relationship?
Hi VisionaryTribe,
Watch this video below first. Then provide me a follow up questions if you are still confused.
ua-cam.com/video/Gqb3S7GqPaY/v-deo.html
Hey Jeffrey ….if you can teach men not to stray sexually from their significant other would be perfect as this whole set of negative behaviors like resentment , stonewalling , anger …..would NOT interfere in that relationship ……it is almost impossible to get over on the other person who cheats sexually on you …. Thank you .
Can you creat emotional safety by texting or calling ?
Hi KirsiMooz,
Short answer.. no you can create emotional safety through texting. Come join me here in my free 90 min master class to learn a lot more on emotional safety and how to start creating it.
relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
Anyone know where the 5 part training link is?
hi Geoffrey I find all your content very valuable. I am dealing with partner issues currently and it is due to a lack of emotional safety where I get overly harsh and aggressive and see everything as a threat. My partner told me she does not feel safe and valued. Do you think that a way for me to instill more safety in arguments might be in my stance and posture? I've been thinking about this a lot whether simply standing shoulder by shoulder in a situation might make me realize i am not opposing my partner and making her a target or victim - but instead standing side by side and seeing a 'way out' together. I know its not enough but could this work? Thanks for your time.
So True!
Please describe this process when a narcissist is involved. They don't necessarily respond logically/as normal, reciprocal people do. They don't play by the rules.
Step 4head -- How do you know your are dealing with a biological narcissist, rather than someone who might be acting that way as a defensive mechanism due to lack of safety? The reason I ask is that statistically, much less than 1% of the population is a biological narcissist, but a lot of people seem to think their partner is. The numbers don't add up. What people think of as a narcissist is actually just a misdiagnosed defense mechanism.
Did he end the free masterclass?
Can this also be applied in friendships between guys? Or a friendship between a guy and a girl?
what about LDR. no possibility of in person contact or at least not until some trust or safety is built?
How do I create emotional safety?
My gosh this is both my wife and I
a video on psychological safety
Good evening.I would like to know how to deal with my partner who gets defensive when i ask him about his bad habits .
Change the way you bring up these topics. Learn the frameworks. Here's one: ua-cam.com/video/CLAETauyP40/v-deo.html
A few weeks ago i confessed to my significant other that i have been using drugs infrequently (Weed and Percocet) for about a month. She asked me to stop and the next day i quit cold turkey, flushed it all down the toilet and promised i would use only medications prescribed to me by my doctor. How can i make sure that she knows the sincerity of my promise to quit using while not coming off like a kid bragging to there parents that they havent misbehaved? Niether of us have mentioned it sense the revelation. I just want her to know there are NO Secrets between us now or ever again any help?
Hi Mike Wright,
Building trust is not about words or promises. Trust is time and consistency of actions.
Sure, would love to help. What about the mindsets and tools of how to rebuild emotional safety, having no secrets did you learn in this video and what can I help you with?
@@GeoffreySetiawan i would try to talk about difficult things but almost as soon as i begin a difficult subject my partner would tell me im pushing them away and get upset. To avoid seeing them upset i would drop the subject and say im ok (which was a lie). Over time the suppression of my own emotions and inability to express them caused our relationship to deteriorate. Your videos that have been helping me the most are about Emotional safety and psychological safety. I wont be seeing my Significant Other until next monday 8 days from now. I plan to try and use your videos to help me express how we need to feel safe in both ways i also plan to address some of the boundaries we've set up and talk about which ones we need longer and which ones we can begin to pull down. Thanks for replying your a heck of a guy!
How can one create safety when one partner is afraid of what the other one says in anger? Sometimes the partner steps across the line when angry.
Other than the obvious (don’t do that again) how can one partner make the other one feel safe that this behavior is being worked on?
Hi Joe Marougi,
Can you tell me how becoming emotionally bulletproof like I advise could be the answer here?
@@GeoffreySetiawan Yup. Once one has a grasp on their emotions then they won’t do it again.
I guess “time” is the only answer here since there’s no way to let your partner know you won’t do that again until enough time goes by so they can see for themselves that it doesn’t happen any more?
I was hoping there may be a way for them to feel safer sooner than having to wait in real time for it not to happen again. Until then they will still feel a bit threatened by it.
Can't see the facebook link on my phone
Hi Geoff. The Facebook link is kinda broken.
What is the best way to end a discussion/argument that has already escalated beyond reasonable emotional control?
Hey Geoffrey
Please read this it’s Important
Thanks a lot for your videos
I am following them my partner told me on 18th feb that she needs time while on 14th feb we meet and everything was really good i did not understand the space thing properly and hence I kept on messaging her then I ended up learning from ur videos about space and i started giving her time
Its been 8 march today I worked on my self she can see my changes but she says that see when we are not focusing on relationship we are doing good else we were just in a toxic cycle for 9 months but i dont agree i am working on myself do u think she will ever comeback ?
@geoffrey
Does the link not work anymore for the free guide?
Is should be working. What's the issue you're encountering?
How to build psychological safety?
But i dont know how to start a deeper conversatios .. because Everytime i start open a conversation she gets mad.. pls help me
ALEAH ADELITO, I want you to watch this video and see if this applies to your situation and come back and let me know.
ua-cam.com/video/AnLNVARvpU8/v-deo.html
@@GeoffreySetiawan thank sow much sir.. ok ill try its so hard to open an deeper conversatios with her because we are in long distance relationship as of now for 3years.. but were 6years last day.. and i dont want to loose hope .
I hurt my gf's feelings and shs holds pain, anger and sadness towerds me. She loves me and we still live together, she almost cheated on but i do not blame her, I played video games non stop.She cannot experience sexual pleasure and does feel to kiss me. She seems to want to rebuild out relationship. How can I make her trust me? Is it right that she cannot feel sexual pleasure because of her hurt feelings and emotional safety?
I need a partner that is emotionally stable. This is all a big headache
Why in the world does it have to be so complicated. Emotional safety was not a thing 20 years ago. The only reason why these are things is because people are wanting these things to be things. My wife works hard to get her feeling hurt making it impossible to talk to her. When I have to think so hard how to talk to her, I forget what it was that I wanted to say
Hi Trey,
While yes, 20 years ago emotional safety was not as evident as it is now. But being evident does not make it any less important.
Let me ask you, what is complicated about not being reactive in conversation and trying to understand someone other than yourself's point of view?
Seems kind of simple to me, but I may be missing something, I don't know. You tell me.
@@GeoffreySetiawan it’s not too bad when their perspective is not too far from reality and I can make sense of it. What’s bad is when it’s a bold face lie. These days unreasonable perspectives are manageable and different points of view are not difficult to discuss and understand. But the lies being offered as explanations and worst used as explanations and offered as reason for behavior. I have lots of trouble navigating conversations when I’m given for example “I’m distant and disengaged because my mother made me sleep in the dark” or “I don’t want to help with the kids because it reminds me of when I was bulled at school”. and for me to focus on it is abusive. I just walk away saying this is not serious
@@GeoffreySetiawan And I think that is what I’m saying. Is that when you cater to these type of feelings and emotions, you give it some legitimacy, that in reality it doesn’t deserve, nor is it beneficial to a healthy mind, or relationship. Thank you so much for replying
What if they don't want emotional safety? ...never did love you😪
Hi Sharon Fisher,
Through my enrolling 1500 clients a year and many many years of research I have yet to find anyone not wanting emotional safety. The question we have to ask ourselves is do they not want it from us? Then if not, how can we learn and grow in the right ways to be able to have them want to in the future?
澳洲有種族歧視？妳肯定未遇過澳洲